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Floriduh Woman

You are here: Home / Archives for Floriduh Woman

Floriduh! Woman Or Cat Blogging? You Make the Call

by Adam L Silverman|  September 11, 20199:14 pm| 30 Comments

This post is in: Cat Blogging, Humorous, Open Threads, Popular Culture, Floriduh Woman

We report, you decide!

THERE IS A SIAMESE LOOKING CAT CLIMBING UP MY SCREEN CAGE AND WALKING ON MY LABIA pic.twitter.com/LALB0K6Q9e

— Best of Nextdoor (@bestofnextdoor) September 11, 2019

Obligatory:

Open Thread!

Floriduh! Woman Or Cat Blogging? You Make the CallPost + Comments (30)

Get offa my lawn!

by Betty Cracker|  August 19, 20192:21 pm| 200 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, Floriduh Woman

Well, dock, to be more specific:

The river is just below flood stage, which this gator interpreted as an invitation to hoist itself up onto the dock for a snooze. I interrupted its rest, first with a photo, then by performing my version of the “lion’s roar” from Kung Fu Hustle. It skedaddled.

The National Weather Service predicts water levels will drop back toward normal this week. Good!

Open thread!

Get offa my lawn!Post + Comments (200)

Floriduh! Woman: Concealed Carry Edition

by Adam L Silverman|  August 17, 201911:09 pm| 60 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, All Too Normal, Floriduh Woman

I don’t think this is allowed even with a valid Florida Concealed Weapons License!

Officials say a Florida woman who pulled a small alligator from her yoga pants during a traffic stop and illegally possessed numerous other wild animals was sentenced to probation after pleading guilty to four charges. https://t.co/wMGJH4Is0k #odd

— AP Oddities (@AP_Oddities) August 15, 2019

Take it away WNDU!

PUNTA GORDA, Fla. (AP) – Officials say a Florida woman who pulled a small alligator from her yoga pants during a traffic stop and illegally possessed numerous other wild animals has been sentenced to probation after pleading guilty to four charges.

Florida prosecutors say a Charlotte County sheriff’s deputy stopped a pickup truck in May after it ran a stop sign. The driver, 22-year-old driver Michael Clemons, told the deputy he and his 25-year-old passenger, Ariel Machan-Le Quire, were collecting frogs and snakes under an overpass. He gave the deputy permission to search bags in the truck.

When the deputy found 41 3-stripe turtles in a “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle” backpack, he asked if Machan-Le Quire had anything else. She pulled the 1-foot gator from her pants.

Officials say the Clemons case is pending.

I hope she was at least using a holster!

Open thread!

Floriduh! Woman: Concealed Carry EditionPost + Comments (60)

All That’s Missing From This Story Is an Alligator, a Golf Cart, and Several Kilos of Cocaine: Approaching Peak Floriduh! Man

by Adam L Silverman|  August 11, 20199:24 pm| 78 Comments

This post is in: Ammosexuals, Because of wow., Gun nuts, gun safety, Guns, Open Threads, Floriduh Man, Floriduh Woman

Welcome to the Gunshine State!

Is that a GLOCK in your orgy party outfit pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Take it away Daytona Beach News-Journal!

A 9 mm Glock was taken from a bedroom during a sex party, in which guests wore masks during the orgy and were encouraged to use code names, deputies say

A handgun was swiped from a Deltona home during a weekend sex party and the gun owner couldn’t give detectives any names of possible suspects because the culprit — like the 20 or so other guests at the party — was wearing a mask, deputies said.

“We’re probably not going to solve this one,” Volusia County Sheriff’s Sgt. Todd Smith said during a public meeting Thursday. “And DNA (identification) is not going to be an option.”

The 9 mm Glock was holstered and lying on top of a nightstand in the master bedroom when it was stolen, the homeowner told deputies. It was taken during an orgy, in which the theme was anonymous sex, according to a report.

Guests who were invited to the party near Saxon Boulevard were encouraged to “come and go as they pleased” throughout the weekend and were told to bring friends and acquaintances if they so desired, the report stated.

Additionally, guests were told to use fictitious names or no name at all, the homeowner told the Sheriff’s Office.

The orgy took place July 19-21 and deputies were contacted a few days later. On July 26, the detective assigned to the case called the homeowner for more information, but he seemed “apprehensive” about giving further details.

The homeowner eventually told the detective that 20 or so people were in his house that weekend and he guessed that he only knew five or six of them, the report stated.

The party was advertised on a social media site, deputies said.

All this needed to achieve peak Floriduh! Man is an alligator, a golf cart, and several kilos of cocaine!

Open thread!

All That’s Missing From This Story Is an Alligator, a Golf Cart, and Several Kilos of Cocaine: Approaching Peak Floriduh! ManPost + Comments (78)

FloridDuh! Woman: Electoral Edition

by Adam L Silverman|  August 3, 201911:40 am| 38 Comments

This post is in: America, Crazification Factor, Domestic Politics, Election Year, Open Threads, Politics, All Too Normal, Assholes, Clown car, Clown Shoes, Floriduh Woman, General Stupidity, Not Normal, Our Failed Political Establishment, Shameless self promotion, The Wingularity

This is a little too on the nose for even Florida if you ask me.

Laura Loomer files to run against Rep. Lois Frankel. Running Loomer’s campaign: Trump’s 2016 Florida state director, Karen Giorno

FL-21 is a blue district, based in Palm Beach County, home to Trump’s winter getaway club, Mar-a-Lago pic.twitter.com/srDjzZtvu4

— Marc Caputo (@MarcACaputo) August 2, 2019

Loomer is originally from the Miami area, but who has lived in Arizona and New York as well, has, apparently recently moved back Florida just to run for Congress. The Democratic incumbent is Lois Frankel, who has been representing this district,  since 2017 and prior to that represented Florida as the representative from District 22, which after redistricting is now represented by Congressman Ted Deutch.  Frankel has also been the mayor of West Palm Beach, and was the minority leader in the Florida state House of Representatives.

From what I know of Loomer – deliberatively and almost shamelessly provocative, racist and bigoted, especially against Muslims, friendly with either those in the alt-right and extreme right circles playing footsie with white supremacists and neo-NAZIs or actually with white supremacists, neo-NAZIs, the men’s rights nutbars and Milo, as well as being a fantacist and a conspiracist – I think the real reason for Loomer’s run is both to suck up money through donations and to force social media platforms to let her back on. I fully expect that she is going to use her candidacy to try to force twitter, Instagram, and YouTube to let her back on and monetize those platforms because if they don’t they’re aiding her political opponent in the election. All while monetizing her election as an income stream because she doesn’t actually have any actual employment.

Open thread!

FloridDuh! Woman: Electoral EditionPost + Comments (38)

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
6h 1206142497493307392

New Post added at Balloon Juice - Sunday Morning Garden Chat: Flowers of the Rainbow Goddess -https://www.balloon-juice.com/2019/12/15/sunday-morning-garden-chat-flowers-of-the-rainbow-goddess/

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RookieCityCop avatarRookie City Sergeant@RookieCityCop·
25 Nov 1198968926245441536

Grabbed a coffee mug this morning to walk my daughter to the bus stop.

Took my coffee with me and drank it while I talked to other parents for about 10 minutes.

The coffee mug was from my wife's bachelorette party.

It said "Same Penis Forever".

So how's your Monday?

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
11h 1206072343153586176

New Post added at Balloon Juice - Extremely Stupid Watergate Open Thread: It'd Be Funnier If He Didn't Have the Nuclear Codes -

Balloon Juice | Extremely Stupid Watergate Open Thread: It'd Be Funnier If He Didn't Have the Nuclear Codes

This is so pathetic it may even make a few MAGA-heads wonder if maybe he’s not well. https://t.co/KgJkmmClYX — Dana Houle (@DanaHoule) Decembe...

www.balloon-juice.com

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
11h 1206064663198388225

then why the fuck are you here

then why the fuck are you here
CNN Politics@CNNPolitics

"I'm not trying to pretend to be a fair juror here": Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham predicts Trump impeachment will "die quickly" in the Senate https://cnn.it/2ROMKkt

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
12h 1206054158509465600

New Post added at Balloon Juice - Open Thread: "But It's Xmas for *Us*, Too..." -

Balloon Juice | Open Thread: "But It's Xmas for *Us*, Too..."

BEWARE! If you see this walnut-sized mass on your Christmas tree, make sure to cut it off and take it outside. It is actually a cluster of hundreds of...

www.balloon-juice.com

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GaryLegum avatarGary Legum@GaryLegum·
13h 1206036101238054914

Yeah, but Hoover looked better in a nightie. https://twitter.com/JasonSCampbell/status/1206035853094662144

Twitter feed video.Yeah, but Hoover looked better in a nightie. https://t.co/sfdhXFbWaU
Jason Campbell@JasonSCampbell

Jeanine Pirro says James Comey has surpassed J Edgar Hoover as the most corrupt FBI director in history

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ag_due avatarD’Ag due@ag_due·
22h 1205907904999690240

Cenk Uygur is a Republican-funded, Armenian genocide denying, misogynist pig with zero progressive credentials beyond a mythology created by his own media outlet. His entire schtick is about revenge for being rejected by accomplished democrats, his audience is Rand Paul incels. https://twitter.com/cenkuygur/status/1205619909331308544

Cenk Uygur@cenkuygur

No, I have a history of being a strong progressive advocate. That is all I was known for until this attempt at character assassination by corporate Democrats & media. This is an attempt to wipe away decades of work with a couple of out of context smears. End the corruption! https://twitter.com/KTLA/status/1205618124403249152

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
15h 1206009805321768960

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
16h 1205991637291347968

I GUESS WE ARE TOTALLY FUCKED WHEN BERNIE RUNS IN THE NEXT UK ELECTION

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Johngcole avatarJohn Cole@Johngcole·
18h 1205959380635725829

New Post added at Balloon Juice - One Month Out: Last Call on Site Rollout Issues -

Balloon Juice | One Month Out: Last Call on Site Rollout Issues

The new site rolled out a month ago, and I’d like to get a feel for where things stand in terms of any remaining problems with the way the site ...

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