I am back from the

I am back from the wedding, and it was a blast. Nemacolin is beautiful, and it was fun hanging out with 200 people all dressed in tuxedos. Should resume posting (ranting) tonight.

No more posting until tomorrow.

No more posting until tomorrow. I am heading to my good friend and roommate of three year’s wedding, so I will be out of the loop.

More details on the awful

More details on the awful tribal gang rape in Pakistan:

Clad in traditional, loose-fitting trousers and blouse and covering her face with a black shawl, the victim said she was sitting in her house on June 22 when her maternal uncle came to their house and asked her to appear for a tribal council to “apologize” for her brother’s alleged sexual encounter.

“When I appeared before the tribal council, an elder of the council … said that since the girl has come here, therefore, we should pardon her,” she said. “But suddenly a man stood and said we will rape her.”


I have not heard the

I have not heard the official numbers lately, but I am willing to bet that the unemployment rate is going up.

Why am I betting that? Because I have a sure-fire barometer for the unemployment rate. When it is below 5%, every one at McDonald’s looks like they are drooling, going to drool, or have drooled onto my food. When it is over 5%, the workers are under 21, have acne, and speak marginal english- but they are not droolers. Over 6%, and they are 35 and have a liberal arts degree (usually history or theater).

At any rate, tonight I had a pimply faced 21 year old, so I am betting unemployment is near 5.6%. Just a guess, though.

The Best Office Memo Ever

The Best Office Memo Ever

This memo was in my box when I came to work today:


To: Department Rumor Mill


Since it took less than 24 hours to foment a great deal of gossipyes, indeed the rumors are true. My wife and I are divorcing. If youd like to receive all the gory details so that they may become the topic of happy hour and late night discussion, please place specific requests in my mailbox and Ill try to respond as quickly as possible.

Have a nice day!

One way to deal with an issue head-on and to stop all the silly gossip.

This is just absurd Bush

This is just absurd

Bush administration officials have told key lawmakers not to expect a U.S. attack on Iraq before the fall elections, allowing time for Congress to debate the possibility of war.

The assurances square with Pentagon estimates that it would take until early next year to have the weapons, intelligence and forces in place to take on Iraq’s 375,000-man army. One key factor: U.S. soldiers can’t fight in Iraq’s summer or autumn heat wearing protective gear against chemical or biological weapons attack.

Hogwash. Bullshit. Balderdash. Nonsense.

I was in the Kuwait desert during the summer. It was miserable hot and we had to take precautions. Yes, I watched my buddies urinate to make sure their urine was not a thick yellow, and if it was, I sat them down and made them drink water. Yes, I had to wear leather gloves every time I touched a tool because otherwise I would burn the hell out of my hands (the sun is that hot). Yes, I had to wear long sleeves and a floppy jungle hat to keep from getting roasted. Yes, I had diarrhea from bad water for a month. Yes, it was 140 degrees inside an M1A1, and at points I thought I was going to dry up and blow away. Yes, I was cold at night when the temperature dropped to 90 (imagine the temperature dropping from 70 to 20- the same difference from 140 to 90).

All those things were true. But anyone who suggests that I would have been incapable of doing my job when ordered to, even with the extra burden of an NBC suit and protective mask, is a moron and a liar and seriously underestimates the training and spirit of the armed forces.

This article is as insulting as it is stupid.

The new Playboy has the

The new Playboy has the NFL Preview, and the Steelers have been picked to win the Superbowl.

Here we Go Steelers, Here We Go!

And yes, I do read the articles.

Just to remind you, yesterday

Just to remind you, yesterday Senator Robert Toricelli was ‘admonished’ after a lengthy investigation by the Senate Ethics committee. The NY Times editorial page says nothing about it. They even find time to write about Pilot Whales.

George Bush is cleared in an SEC investigation 10+ years ago. The NY Times editorial board calls for an independent prosecutor to review the matter.

Andrea Harris at Spleenville World

Andrea Harris at Spleenville World Domination Headquarters has some great suggestions for dealing with a special group of cowards, musicians and other artists who are backing out of going to Israel to perform.

Right on Andrea.

Senator Billary opened her mouth

Senator Billary opened her mouth this weekend

and a long high-pitched wail was emitted. Or maybe that was her thighs rubbing together. At any rate, the partisan shrew had many fun things to say about Bush and this adminstration wrecking her hubby’s record. Yawn.

*** UPDATE *** The Dailypundit discusses the foul wench and her comments. I will stick to ad hominems.

Paging Mr. Raines Don Rumsfeld,

Paging Mr. Raines

Don Rumsfeld, and thus, the administration, has stated that Saddam Hussein is a bad man with nasty toys. It is now official. On the record. Could we please have your permission to attack now?

Senate Panel Admonishes Torricelli for

Senate Panel Admonishes Torricelli for Accepting Gifts

The Senate Ethics Committee on Tuesday “severely admonished” Democratic Sen. Robert Torricelli of New Jersey for accepting gifts from a campaign contributor and businessman that the lawmaker aided.

So, Robert Toricelli is a lying, cheating, unethical toilet treat- enough so that his fellow sewer trout on the Senate Ethics committee could not gloss it over. That means at least 1% of the Senate is hopelessly corrupt- so if we apply the same reasoning the Democrats and the NY Times used during the recent corporate scandals, we should ba ble to tar and feather the entire Senate. Seems fair, doesn’t it? When less than 1% of the corporate world is exposed as lying scum, we have a national stroke and write new laws to police their behavior. One percent of the Senate is now officially a snake- better call in business leaders from across the country to re-write the Senate ethics rules.

I doubt this will happen.

I was away when this

I was away when this was first posted, but everyone should read it. Driving tips from Cold Fury.

Donahue is a smarmy, condescending,

Donahue is a smarmy, condescending, self-righteous bastard,

but I am sure glad he is on television again. AT first I was opposed, but when I thought about it, I actually was quite pleased. Why? Because he admits he is a liberal, and people might begin to associate his idiotic ideas with the failed experiment that modern liberalism has become. This is a good thing- quite unlike the liberal NY Times, which merely distorts every libertarian and conservative position without admitting they are liberal.

Donahue is out there spouting off at the mouth, inundating the airwaves with his limousine liberalism, and we can all laugh at him, and thank goodness that his ideas have no traction whatsoever. I hope the Streisand/Clinton crowd keep cheering him on when he spouts the Democrat party line- it makes my job easier to out your stupid solutions.

BTW- I really like Jerry Nachman’s show. I disagree with him on a GREAT number of things, but I think he is very fair with his guests, very respectful, and I like the fact that there is little or no shouting. I did get a slight chuckle tonight when he mentioned the beached whales in Massachussetts. I am sure you can figure out why…