Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

It’s a tarp!

Forty-two’ said Deep Thought, with infinite majesty and calm.

We Survived Breitbartpocalypse!

Han shot first.

Almost as fun as hiking the Appalachian Trail.

Today in our ongoing national embarrassment…

This Blog Goes to 11…

We have all the best words.

This is how realignments happen…

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity.

No one could have predicted…

This blog is Obama’s Katrina.

Where tasty lettuce and good mustard aren’t elitist.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

We still have time to mess this up!

Not all heroes wear capes.

Mission Accomplished!

How has Obama failed you today?

This is a big f—–g deal.

Militantly superior in their own minds…

Saul Alinsky is my co-pilot

Verified, but limited!

Dinky Hocker Shoots Smack!

I personally stopped the public option…

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Late Night Horrorshow Open Thread: “How did the Republican party arrive at this place?”

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Late Night Schadenfreude Open Thread: Be Best, Baltimore!

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… Trump was addressing students at the B’More Youth Summit on Opioid Awareness at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County (UMBC). The event was part of her “Be Best” initiative on issues affecting children, including bullying and the dangers of opioid use…

The first lady was met with boos when she walked onstage after her introduction. The audience remained noisy through most of her five-minute speech.

She was once again booed loudly when she finished her speech and walked offstage, according to reporters at the event and a live video (around the 5:30 mark)…

President Donald Trump came under fire earlier this year for a racist tirade against Baltimore in which he called it “a disgusting, rat and rodent infested mess” where “no human being would want to live.”

He also criticized Rep. Elijah Cummings, who represented a large portion of the city prior to his death last month. This prompted the Baltimore Sun editorial board to refer to the president as “vermin” in a scorching editorial…

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Repub Stupidity Open Thread: Another ‘Forthright, Outspoken Conservative’ Disappoints the Pundits

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A little late-night nostalgia bait for those of us who used to hang around TBogg’s site, back before Cole got smarter. Alternate title: ‘Another GHWB-vintage rightwing icon tries to update their Q score, overshoots, embarrasses former supporters’…

Sorry Ms Malkin (Coulter, Ingraham, Palin), you’ve aged out of attracting the coveted 18-34 demographic, now. So you’re condemned to the Fox News networks where your *old* fans like Rick Lowry and Hugh Hewitt still remember the pre-social-media ‘starbursts’ you inspired…

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Late Night Schadenfreude / Rumormonging Open Thread – Walter Reed Edition

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“Oh, like sitting on the can for an hour or so furiously texting isn’t work?”

I personally subscribe to the theory that, after a bad news week, the Oval Office Occupant had a massive panic attack, complete with chest pain and shortness of breath. But since he’s a uniquely powerful fat old man — and since another 20202 candidate recently suffered ‘chest discomfort’ that turned out to be an actual myocardial infarction — he got hauled off to Walter Reed ASAP, just in case. Didn’t wanna gloat too soon last night, but since there’s no been no honest updates…

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The Chucklefuck Clown Cavalcade

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¡Buenas noches, Juicers! Yeah, I was going to start things off with my usual elan and graciousness, but due to circumstances where I really wish I could slap the stupid out of people’s genes, I’m going to commence with rant and we’ll do the formal howdy doody and cat pics the minute we get images to work on the blog? Ok? Good talk, glad we’re on the same page.

Lo, the ultrafuckery. And it’s not even CNN?! I can’t tell if I’m marveling at CNN not delving into this level of commentary or disappointed at NBC News for grabbing a shovel and digging right to the Marianas Trench level of analysis. Deep Stupid, indeed.

Whenever I’ve said I was against impeachment, even to the point of don’t discuss impeach club, the media was why. We don’t have great journalism. We never had universally great journalism, but we had a standard that managed to keep mostly on target. Regular old journalism is boring statement of facts. Some obvious, some not, & some you have hunt them down because they’re hella elusive. Instead, we have a packs of styrofoam peanuts shoved into Hugo Boss suits always looking for a hot mic. The American press is always looking for the highest highs, the flashiest story. Much like watching McG’s cinematic oeuvere, they think everything should be the noisiest, most explosive drama, no matter how serious the issue is. When our media behaves like this, no wonder we’re pretty far gone into fascism. I can’t see a future where we survive this mess and the press stays the same. I’ve watched it locally and seen how it mirrors the national media. Reporters, pundits, analysts – they want flash & smoke. What they don’t get is that this teaches people who need to be told about the facts, that the issues aren’t really that important. …

It’s a good profession, journalism. Pity so few are actually working in it.

Maybe somewhere, a batch of good journos are trying to do something about this mess bourne of 24/7 news channels and the idea that news should be as glitzy as tv show. I bid them good luck. And I chuck a hefty twitter brick at this media analysis about impeachment hearings needing PIZZAZZ.

For real pizzazz, Jonathan Allen should just watch Joel Grey & Gonzo do Fosse.
THAT’S PIZZAZ!

Dems shouldn’t be required to put on a carnival for members of the 4th estate to do their duty on reporting cleanly, smartly and accurately so we have an informed citizenry.

alright, I’m trying to finish 3 pages today, back to work.

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Another Red State Report

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I haven’t been posting much lately due to the 5,000 mile road trip I took last month. Most of it was through fairly rural red states, or the rural part of purple states. I have an insight that I will share with you beautiful people, and you alone: the smaller and poorer your town, the more Jesus and/or abortion signs you’ll have. If your town is in the rural Midwest or Plains states, they’ll be abortion signs. If it’s the South or Texas, you’re gonna see a slogan about the Lord. Just like Dollar General, Jesus/abortion signs are a real tell-tale of the economic health of an area, if you missed the shuttered retail and broken windows. More after the break.

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Friday Night Impeachment Watch: Nancy Pelosi Talks to Steven Colbert

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Good for Madam Speaker, now and forever…

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Wednesday Morning Open Thread: New Story (Old Narrative)

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Meanwhile, across the aisle: ‘… Because our lips get tired!’


SRSLY:

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G7 Open Thread: Good News (If We Can Keep Him to It)

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More immediately:

If you’re in a paranoid mood (remember, even paranoids have real enemies!): It has been widely assumed that Trump’s ‘special guest nation’ at this G7 would be… Russia. What price a scenario where Putin rejects his puppet’s down-at-heels hotel, and tells him he’d prefer to introduce his own ‘security arrangements’ at Camp David?

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PSA Open Thread: Must-*Not*-Watch Video

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Over the weekend, those second-tier benchwarmers not required to fluff His Lardship during his hatefest trifecta got together (at a Trump property, of course!) to throw themselves a fan-fest. Complete with ‘volunteer’ videos, including a (possibly deliberately) amateurish parody of the Kingsman movie, showing Trump as a fit’n’focused James Bond character shooting up a church full of ‘media figures’. This — I know, you’re shocked — didn’t go over well with the media in question. (AMPFest has since disavowed the video, FWIW.)

You’d think the Trumpsters would be a little more cautious, given present circumstances, about pissing off the already-getting-bored media figures required to facilitate their attempts to steal another election, but then: High-quality hires are not a Trump trademark.

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Much further down the political food chain, the Sanders campaign announced they’d be hiring independent video producer Matt Orfalea because his extremely enthusiastic pro-Bernie YouTube commercials were so viral. Unfortunately, outside researchers soon discovered ‘#Orf’ had also produced a wealth of deeply cringeworthy material, including a 2-minute ‘parody’ clip-cut entitled ‘MLK: I Have A Wet Dream’. Which I am not linking, not even to one of the many tweets decrying it, because it is every bit as disgusting as you’d imagine, or worse. (Public obscenity standards have relaxed a lot since the days when Sanders was writing rape-fantasy ‘think pieces’ for his local newspaper.) When neither the ‘can’t you people take a joke’ or the ‘when I was young and irresponsible… ‘ defenses defused the critics, the campaign hastily un-hired Orfalea. So, if the Sandernistas are lucky (and can keep from relitigating it all over social media), this glitch in the primary matrix will go unnoticed beyond the obscure realms of the Politically Engaged Online.

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Saturday Morning Open Thread: Don’t Just Protest, Do It Fabulously!

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From the Washington Post, “A spice company spent more money on impeachment ads on Facebook than anyone not named Trump”:

… On Wednesday, Axios published a list of the entities spending the most money on Facebook ads on both sides of the impeachment debate. They included the usual suspects of the political war roll call, including Trump himself (he was top of the list, of course, at $718,000), Democratic presidential candidates Tom Steyer and Elizabeth Warren, and both the National Republican Congressional Committee and the National Republican Senatorial Committee.

But one name jumped off the screen for its sheer one-of-these-things-is-not-like-the-other factor: Penzeys Spices, the nation’s largest spice retailer, had dropped $92,000 from Sept. 29 to Oct. 5 on ads championing impeachment. That was more than self-funding millionaire Steyer, more than hard-charging Warren — more than anyone else other than Trump…

For many Penzeys fans, it comes as no surprise. The company has a history of unabashed liberal activism. Its founder, Bill Penzey, greeted Trump’s election with an email calling the president an “openly racist candidate.” As Helen Rosner noted in a New Yorker story last year, that set him far apart from the rest of the business-leader pack. He was “quite possibly the first to publicly call Trump’s election an ‘embrace of racism,’” she wrote. “And he was definitely the first to do so while hawking a free bottle of Quebec Seasonings with any five-dollar purchase.”…

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Accidental Open Thread (Texas)

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This outdated partial draft got front-paged while I wasn’t around. I’d take it down now, if not for the conversations in the comments. Won’t happen again, I *hope*!

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https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/take-texas-seriously-gop-anxiety-spikes-after-retirements-democratic-gains/2019/08/02/d9e9942c-b4b8-11e9-8949-5f36ff92706e_story.html

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Gun Safety PSA: Back to School Essentials

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Trigger warning — this spot is almost too effective…

Seriously good work by the Sandy Hook Promise people — I learned about it from a spot on the local news, and I suspect it’s going viral on the airwaves as well as in social media.

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Thursday Morning Open Thread: Smash the Green Lantern (Theory)

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Late Night KKKlown Car Open Thread: The GOP Retreat (But Trump Found Them Anyway)

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Even though it meant not live-tweeting during the DNC’s Houston debate, where he was guaranteed a (considerably less flattering) large audience. Per the Washington Post:

… With the president speaking here Thursday to a closed-door retreat of House Republicans, scores of protesters gathered to express opposition to White House policies and outrage at Trump’s recent tweets calling Maryland’s largest city “the Worst in the USA.”

The visit by the president — who maligned Baltimore as a “disgusting, rat and rodent infested mess” where “no human being would want to live” — was limited to a dinnertime speech kicking off the GOP retreat at the Baltimore Marriott Waterfront Hotel in Harbor East.

House Republicans selected Baltimore as the location for their three-day conference long before the president’s attack on the city, where Democrats outnumber Republicans 10 to 1. Well before the White House announced that Trump would attend the conference, a coalition of advocacy groups calling themselves the Baltimore Welcoming Committee had planned days of rallies to protest GOP policies on immigration, climate change and other topics. There was to be a singalong, a light show and a dance party. Organizer Sharon Black said Trump’s scheduled appearance “upped the ante.”

“This is about the remarks about Baltimore and his policies. You can’t really separate the two,” she said…

Of course, Donny Dollhands goes nowhere without a few of his devoted sycophants…

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