John Cole Presents “This Fucking Old House”

First things first- that bullshit stunt Trump signed about police reform isn’t worth the paper it was written on so there is no point talking about it.

Now to the important shit- I posted some pictures of the backyard and everyone was “Screw the yard what about the birds?” Ask and ye shall receive.

Geranium nest is active and occupied:

Dead Fern nest #1 is active and occupied:

Live fern nest appears to have been abandoned:

Dead fern nest #2 is similarly abandoned:

The nest at the top of the column has had its inhabitants move on, and the birb house on the porch is now home to a wasp nest, which I am just going to let be because wasps gotta live somewhere and that’s as good a place as any.

Once the occupants of the dead fern nest #1 move on, and I am going to move the nests into live ferns in case they came back for a second litter. Is it called a litter? I don’t know, but that is what I am calling it. Regardless, I am composting the dead ferns and transferring the nests into new plants so they don’t feel like the landlord just up and kicked them out. I don’t know if that is how this works I am not a bird specialist but that is how I am gonna approach itr.

“Don’t Bogart Them Birbs,” They SaidPost + Comments (170)

Manhandling this:

And that handful of wildflower seeds I dropped in the front yard a few years ago:

What Has John Cole Been Doing?Post + Comments (72)

I am pleased to report that my front porch is now at 100% occupancy. There are nests in both dead ferns, a nest in the live fern, a nest in the geraniums, a nest in the corner above the column, a nest in the petunias (which have only been there two weeks), and a nest in the actual bird house.

I’m going to need to hang more plants while we wait for the oak and maple tree to mature enough to be nestworthy.

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This has been developing for a while now, but I didn’t want to tell you all since there is so much awful going on in the world, but I feel like I sort of have to so if something does happen, it will not come as a huge surprise out of the blue.

Rosie is not doing very well this year. Her hip degeneration has been worsening over the past few years, and for the past few months she has been really losing weight. I took her to the vets a while back for a battery of tests, and all her bloodwork was fine, so nothing showed up there. However, even though she is eating, she is losing weight, just not herself, and has been drinking a lot of water, and just slowly deteriorating. I’ve watched her fall down the stairs a couple times, and she just sits there afterwards with a sort of sheepish “god damnit” look on her face- the same way I felt when I fell through the deck the day I bought the house.

I’ve spoken with Harry, and he thinks she may have cancer, but there is not really anything we can and should do for it, because with her hip degeneration, any treatment might kill her, and she is too frail to really have surgeries to begin with. So we’re basically just keeping an eye on her, keeping her on her pain meds, and making sure she is still living her best life. I made her some scrambled eggs for lunch, and she is eating like a champ, so that is always good.

Again, there is nothing imminent, but I wanted to let you all know.

Some Not So Good NewsPost + Comments (121)

We had FOUR whole days where I could open the windows. FOUR.

It went from 45 to 65-70 to now FUCK YOU HOT.

This is bullshit.

Also, with all the sun coming into my house I am able to see all the filth I have been wallowing in for six months.

Happy Memorial DayPost + Comments (53)

Lots of awful in the news, our President is still a fucking loser asshole sociopath, so I am not going to talk about any of it. I will talk about the very vivid dream I had last night.

I dreamt that I had a 90 year old tortoise who had been passed down through generations, and I was very attached to him. His name was Gary. At any rate, Gary developed some rare disease and his shell started to deteriorate into gel, and I had to have his upper shell removed to save his life. I then fashioned a temporary shell out of a very large copper mixing bowl that I found at the consignment store, and then had a friend fashion an elaborate permanent replacement shell with a 3d printer.

In other news, the wildflowers I planted in the front yard walkway bed three years ago are back with a vengeance:

If I lived in the country I would just plant fields of wildflowers.

*** Update ***

No sooner did I hit publish on this post when I turned around and found this majestic motherfucker:

I love him so much.

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Apparently two weeks ago I left my ferns out on a night that it frosted, and it killed all the ferns I got dirt cheap. I guess they were dirt cheap because they knew it was going to frost again and they wanted to get rid of them without a loss. At any rate, I was going to take them down and try to trim away the dead stuff and see if they could be saved, but it looks like I am just going to have to let them be because we have several families who have moved back in:

Additionally, the bird’s nest in the corner of the column that I left up all winter was a couple weeks ago torn down- I walked outside to go do something for my parents, and it was gone. A couple hours later I returned, and it was rebuilt. I have not taken out the stepladder and inspected it yet, but I know there is a lot of activity going on because the top rip is lined with bird poop and small downy feathers, so I know there are some more babies in there.

I was going to take a picture, but I got distracted because Thurston was raising a ruckus in the back yard, and it appears he found a garter snake. I had to chase him into the house (the neighbors got to hear me yell “NOOO LEAVE THE SNAKE ALONE”), and I went back and the snake was still alive, so I made sure Steve was inside and then closed the doggy door.

Full time job keeping everything alive around here. At any rate, super excited that in just two years we have gone from one bird nest on the front porch to now THREE! Next year maybe we can get closer to max occupancy for the spring rentals out front.

Operation Birb 2020Post + Comments (77)