The Online Right as Bad Performance Art, Only With Extra Suck

Red State brings the funny:

Remember the mystery of the missing flags?


Now granted, their candidate is internet challenged, but surely our correspondents from Red State, the premier online site for conservative activism, can not be internet challenged as well. Because perusing the mystical intertrons that elude McCain so easily, I found lots of flags. From Atrios:

You don’t have to look too closely to see what can be described as a SHIT TON of flags on display during Bill Clinton’s speech last night

From the Denver Post:

Hrmm. Flags are indeed elusive at the DNC.

I could go on and on, but you get the point, and unlike John McCain and Red State, you understand the internet. Go have fun and find your own flags. It isn’t hard.

On the other hand, this may explain why the Bush administration never found any WMD in Iraq.

Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don’t Jonah Goldberg Is A Blithering Idiot

This is kind of awesome. Jonah Goldberg, 12:15 PM:

All I have to say is that if it was deliberate — and I really, really doubt it was — then that is the most substantive proof so far that Obama’s youthful arrogance is getting the better of him. The text message ploy on its own was kind of dumb. But if it was a way to tweak Clinton, it was beyond self-indulgent. And the fact that the message went out at 3:00 AM at all is a sign the whole thing was too clever by half.

Jonah Goldberg, 1:29 PM:

You know what? Even if it was a mistake, some grownup over there should have said “3:00 AM? You know what they’ll say, right? Don’t do it at 3:00 AM, it’ll seem like a juvenile jab at Hillary.” Instead, it seems that it didn’t occur to anyone or someone said, “3:00 AM, hah! Take that Hillary!”

So let’s recap. If the text was deliberately sent at 3:00 AM, Obama sucks. If it wasn’t deliberately sent at 3:00 AM, Obama sucks.

It is almost like there is nothing Obama can do to make Jonah happy!



David Freddoso, one of the minions at K-Lo’s House of Crazy, dedicates an entire piece in the WSJ to this:

According to the Chicago Tribune, Mr. Obama’s petition challengers reported to him nightly on their progress as they disqualified his opponents’ signatures on various technical grounds — all legitimate from the perspective of law. One local newspaper, Chicago Weekend, reported that “[s]ome of the problems include printing registered voters name [sic] instead of writing, a female voter got married after she registered to vote and signed her maiden name, registered voters signed the petitions but don’t live in the 13th district.”

One of the candidates would speculate that his signature-gatherers, working at a per-signature pay rate, may have cheated him by signing many of the petitions themselves, making them easy to disqualify.

In the end, Mr. Obama disqualified all four opponents — including the incumbent state senator, Alice Palmer, and three minor candidates. Ms. Palmer, a former ally of Mr. Obama, had gathered 1,580 signatures, more than twice the 757 required to appear on the ballot. A minor, perennial candidate had gathered 1,899 signatures, suggesting the Obama team invested much time working even against him.

The act of throwing an incumbent off the ballot in such a fashion does not fit neatly into the narrative of a public-spirited reformer who seeks to make people less cynical about politics.

Not only have we heard this story over and over an over again, does anyone else find it amusing that law and order Republicans completely get their knickers in a twist because…. Barack Obama followed election laws? I mean, I understand the GOP has become a lawless party of criminals and reprobates, but I didn’t know they were openly advocating NOT following laws.

At any rate, Mr. Freddoso, after watching you and your cohort tongue-bathe the current administration’s perenially lawless and criminal behavior, you might be surprised to find folks getting less than worked up about a candidate who, as you say in your title, played by the rules. It would be a refreshing change.

Redefining Regional

Sign found at our “regional conflict” in Iraq

Old talking points: “Stopping Al Qaeda in Iraq is the key to winning the Greater War on Terror.”

Older talking points: “We have to win in Iraq to spread democracy across the middle east.”

Oldest talking points: “We have to invade Iraq to prevent Manhattan from exploding in a mushroom crowd. Plus, they have tubes and unmanned planes to bomb us with chemicals.”

New and Improved Talking Points: “Iraq is just a regional conflict and Georgia is the true epicenter of the glorious struggle for western civilization.”

The stupid just never, ever stops.

The Comedy Never Stops

Lisa Schiffren, at K-Lo’s House of Crazy, bent out of shape because illegal immigrant vendors won’t sell McCain paraphernalia:

As it happens, most of the counterfeit purses, sunglasses, and some other shlock are sold by West Africans, most of whom are here illegally. In recent days, around the city I have noticed a new addition to their wares: rows of baseball caps with an “Obama” logo. No McCain caps — ever. If you ask, they laugh in a none too friendly way. It’s not that I don’t get it. But you would think that some of these children of God would carry “McCain” caps or t-shirts, if not in recognition of his support for them, then merely because some people might buy them. Market principles dictate that. And you would be wrong.

Not only are they here illegally, but clearly they hate McCain and capitalism equally!

NRO, the nadir of modern conservative thought.