Trump-Sanders Debate, Dog Help Us (Updated)

So last night on Jimmy Kimmel, Donald Trump kinda agreed to debate Bernie Sanders “for charity,” and Sanders tweeted, “Game On. I look forward to debating Donald Trump in California before the June 7th primary.” Two questions — the first rhetorical, the second sincere:

1) Is Sanders out of his fucking mind?
2) Any chance this debate actually happens?

Fox News is the network that was going to sponsor the California Clinton-Sanders debate before Clinton declined to participate, which is what frontrunners do when they develop an insurmountable lead. I’m sure Fox News would field impeccably impartial moderators with 100% fair questions that advanced no partisan agenda whatsoever. Not.

Trump left himself plenty of wiggle room in his comment to Kimmel, but if I were him, I’d damn sure try to make this thing happen – what a golden opportunity to ingratiate himself to Sanders dead-enders while bashing Clinton nonstop. It’s all upside for Trump.

Oh, and let’s pause for a moment and imagine the ear-splitting hissy fit the Sanders people would pitch if Hillary Clinton agreed to debate Trump before the primary ends. This kind of shit right here is what made me evolve from “I’m glad Sanders is in the race — he’s pulling Clinton to the left” to “STFU and go away, Bernie.”

UPDATE: From CBS: “Multiple sources told CBS News Thursday morning, however, that the presumptive nominee [Trump] was just kidding about debating Sanders — it will never happen, they said.” H/T: Commenter Mike J.








Today in Bernie Bullshit

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Ole Bernie has decided to force Kentucky to recanvas the entire fucking state, when at most he will gain one delegate, but probably none at all:

According to the Associated Press article, there is only one delegate remaining to be assigned in Kentucky. That’s in the sixth congressional district, where Clinton currently holds a slim 500 vote lead. Certainly, they should get that count right and assign the delegate accordingly, but otherwise the two candidates split the delegates evenly, 27 to 27. Sanders doesn’t stand to gain any delegates by forcing a recount of all 120 counties in Kentucky. He isn’t fighting for every last delegate. He’s just making up a controversy to throw sand in everyone’s eyes.

This isn’t adult behavior. I hate to say it, but it’s just not.

I wish Clinton could just release a statement that says “If Sanders is going to be such a giant WATB, just give him a fucking delegate and save the money.”

Fucking asshole.








Your Daily Bernie Bullshit

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The Calvinball revolution:

The Democratic party and its Chicago convention were torn apart in 1968 over a fundamental cleavage over the Vietnam War. The Sanders camp is going to blow up the convention to push debate schedule reform? That’s amazing. Reform of the primary process is a much more substantive matter. But remember, as I’ve argued before, the parts of the process most in need of reform (Caucuses and post-election day shenanigans) are the ones helping Sanders the most! Now his whole campaign is based on getting the superdelegates – which for most of the campaign he has said constitute the core anti-democratic aspect of the process – to hand him the nomination. Consistency is an overrated commodity in much of life, especially in politics. But you can’t make the logic of your arguments so structurally unsound that they collapse under the weight of their own ridiculousness.

***

From what I can tell, the current Sanders campaign is riven between people who are increasingly upset or bewildered by what we might call the resurgent “burn it down” turn of Sanders outlook and others who are fully immersed in the feedback loop of grievance and paranoia that sees all the political events of the last year as a series of large and small scale conspiracies to deny the rectitude and destiny of Bernie Sanders. I’ve seen many, many campaigns. People put everything into it and losing is brutal and punishing. Folks on the losing side frequently go a little nuts, sometimes a lot nuts. The 2008 denouement really was pretty crazy. But it’s not clear that this time we have any countervailing force – adulthood, institutional buy-in, future careers, over-riding pragmatism to rein things in.

Only nihilists, college students who are living off their parents, and white employed men with nothing to fear from the Trump administration have the luxury of thinking like this. In other words, the Bernie coalition. Since Jane is on his payroll and also got a nice 200k golden parachute for destroying Burlington College, Sanders will be fine, too.

In case I’m not clear, fuck these guys.








Mansplaining Feels The Bern

Not to put a downer on the site after the quadrapedal delights below, but this nugget from the festering gob of one Jeff Weaver caught my attention:

While he was not at Saturday’s convention, Weaver said that based on the account of Sanders surrogate Nina Turner, the reports of a violent atmosphere had been overblown.

“She said, no one went on the stage. No one had the right to feel threatened,”

Oh no — no right at all to think a howling claque might do harm, wasn’t already doing so.

Thomas_Gainsborough_-_Study_of_a_Woman_in_a_Mob_Cap_-_Google_Art_Project

Instead, Weaver argues, it’s all the fault of those facing what he sees as righteous fury:

“What happens is when you rig the process, and you get an angry crowd, you know they’re not used to that.”

Again with the bullshit about a rigged process — one in which Bernie’s folks failed to show up, didn’t register, and all that.  But that’s beside the point here.

Rather…what the f**k?

Here’s some  middle aged white guy telling those — headed by a women — running a meeting what they get to feel, what they’re allowed to view as a danger.

Makes me weep for my Y chromosome, as well as my party and my country.

I know this is piling on the Balloon Juice Bernie-bile, but I have to say — this one makes the MRA strain in the Sanders campaign shine in high relief for me, and it ain’t pretty.  More to the point — it ain’t what Bernie asked folks to sign up for months ago.  Power — just the whiff of power — corrupts even (or especially) those convinced of their own sanctity.

Image:  Thomas Gainsborough, Study of a Woman in a Mob Cap, undated (before 1788). [Sorry — couldn’t resist the pun]



Pretty Amusing

In case there are a few Sanders supporters I haven’t alienated yet, this from Alexandra Petri is pretty funny:

If Sanders supporters complained about other things the way they complain about election results

CHESS:
This game is rigged. The pawns get to move almost NOWHERE, whereas the QUEEN (DETECT ANY RESEMBLANCE HERE???) can just move wherever she likes with no apparent rhyme or reason. She’s not a bishop or a rook. Why does she move like one? Also, the black pieces have to move second, which is TOTALLY unfair and needs to be looked into, unless I am playing with the white pieces today.

SCRABBLE:
I played exactly the same word as my opponent, using exactly the same letters, and received fewer points for it — just because I wasn’t on some pink square, which my opponent claimed gave you DOUBLE the points. Pretty sure that’s the definition of rigged. Why would you just randomly have squares all over the board that counted for MORE or FEWER points when it’s just the same words? Also my opponent had two BLANK tiles, which just got to be WHATEVER letters she wanted. This seems made-up. Milton Bradley are shills who are trying to prevent the revolution. Also, “BERN” is totally a word.

TENNIS:
Sometimes when the ball lands it is worth 10 points and sometimes it is worth 15 points? This is not consistent. Also, sometimes you only need to win, like, 18 games? But other times you need to win maybe 30? The rules should not be like this. I hear that this game was invented by kings, and now I know why: BECAUSE IT SILENCES THE POINTS OF THE LITTLE GUY. Plus, to win you need ads, and you know who pays for ads.

HEARTS:
THIS GAME IS EVEN MORE RIGGED THAN THE ECONOMY. Hear me out. Usually when you get a heart or the queen of spades, it is an obvious negative, but somehow if you get ALL of the hearts and the queen of spades, you win? This is a blatant lie meant to disenfranchise voters, except for the time when it happened to me by mistake, then it was good.

I chuckled.