THE BOOK OF TRUMP
Chapter Three
1 Now there was in those days a wise and just ruler of the land, who was known as Barack Hussein of the Tribe of Obama. And he was beloved of the people.
2 But there were those who hated Barack, for his skin was of a dusky hue; and among them was Donald, who asked, How can this man be your leader when he was not born in your land? 3 And he said, If this man Barack be your rightful ruler, let him produce sheets of papyrus with markings upon them to prove his place of birth; and let the high priests set thereupon their seal.
4 And when he was much worn down by such foolish demands, Barack of the Obamas did produce papyrus and markings and priestly seals, which did prove his place of birth; but Donald said, these may be false markings, and all those who say they are true markings are themselves false scribes. And he said these words again in a loud voice, saying FALSE SCRIBES! FALSE SCRIBES!
5 Now as the days of Barack’s rule neared their rightful end, the people grieved; for they would miss him. And Donald said, I alone can rule this land. 6 And with his wife Melania, he stepped upon a moving staircase of gold, and he descended to the level of the people, and said unto them, Be sore afraid, for the land called Mexico sends wicked men to our country, to rape our women and plunder our cities; and some, I assume, are good people.