Guys, I’m starting to think there’s something to this Buzzfeed story about Trump suborning perjury and obstructing justice:

Hold up, Gidley — let a pro show you how to deflect:

Except last week Trump said actual supermarket tabloid rag The National Enquirer is more credible than The Washington Post, and The National Enquirer was running interference for Trump during the 2016, as we now know.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders is the only one who remembers the go-to strategy of straight-up lying:

Well, lying is her full-time job. Anyhoo, I hesitate to say it, but this feels something like a turning point. We’ll see.

Disturbing the Peace (Open Thread)

Last night, the mister and I took a sunset cruise in our little swamp boat and annoyed this innocent anhinga:

The bird is clearly saying “FUCK YOU!!” at the 24-second mark.

Anhingas are also called “snake birds” because they swim with their heads sticking out of the water, resembling a snake. After swimming, they roost in trees or on snags to dry their wings. Cormorants do the same and closely resemble anhingas, only cormorants have a curved beak. Here’s one we saw on the same excursion:

Got any big plans for the weekend? Is anyone participating in one of the Women’s Marches taking place nationwide? I was just reading a depressing account of the national Women’s March org — Women’s March Inc. Sounds like they’ve managed to fuck up the whole thing. Le sigh.

We’ll probably hang out at home, maybe go annoy some more swamp critters. You?

Trump is on Twitter fomenting anti-immigrant hatred. Maybe he’s trying to change the subject from the revelation that he committed a felony by directing an underling to lie to Congress, or maybe he’s trying to distract the media from the snowballing effects of the Trump shutdown. Or both. Maybe neither.

He’s claiming that ranchers are finding “prayer rugs” on the border — likely he’s narrating some Fox News reportage, which intersperses clips of interviews with American crackpots and shots of correspondents yelling “CARAVAN” at random pedestrians in Central America.

Rugs, though. That’s some scary stuff. Why, just yesterday, I tripped on a rug with an upturned corner and very nearly stubbed my toe on a coffee table leg.

Anyhoo, open thread.

Dick Maneuver

To retaliate against Speaker Pelosi for taking away his TV time, Trump revealed a previously secret plan for a congressional delegation to a war zone, possibly endangering lives, and has denied Pelosi and other members of congress who were to be part of that delegation permission to use military planes to visit Afghanistan. No, really:

From The Post:

Pelosi was planning to leave for Afghanistan on Thursday afternoon, according to a Democratic aide, but it was unclear whether Pelosi’s trip included the other destinations mentioned by Trump. The aide requested anonymity to discuss plans that had not been made public…

Trump didn’t explain what authority he has to cancel Pelosi’s trip, but it would likely require the use of military aircraft controlled by his administration. He said Pelosi could fly commercial if she wanted to go forward with the visit.

Southwest has a DC-Kabul flight, right? That people use for routine “excursions” to Afghanistan?

Good God, what a petty dickhead.

UPDATE: Pelosi’s deputy chief of staff, Drew Hammill, responds via Twitter:

The CODEL to Afghanistan included a required stop in Brussels for pilot rest. In Brussels, the delegation was scheduled to meet with top NATO commanders, U.S. military leaders and key allies–to affirm the United States’ ironclad commitment to the NATO alliance.

This weekend visit to Afghanistan did not include a stop in Egypt.

The purpose of the trip was to express appreciation & thanks to our men & women in uniform for their service & dedication, & to obtain critical national security & intelligence briefings from those on the front lines.

The President traveled to Iraq during the Trump Shutdown as did a Republican CODEL led by Rep. Zeldin.

Pitch perfect.

May’s Brexit deal defeated

From The Post:

Breaking news: With just 73 days to go until Britain is scheduled to leave the European Union, lawmakers voted down the withdrawal deal that had been painstakingly negotiated between Prime Minister Theresa May and the European Union. May has until Monday to come back to Parliament with a Plan B.

Optional musical accompaniment:

What happens now?

Derp State

That we have a scabrous, demented swine thrashing around the Oval Office causing untold domestic and international turmoil is on the American people, the Republican Party, and the Russian Federation (in no particular order). But assuming our little experiment in democracy survives and committees are impaneled to study what the fuck happened in the detail such a calamitous clusterfuck warrants, should the role of our national security organizations and their political apparatuses be scrutinized too?

Hell yes, they should. It’s already clear Trump is a Russian asset. The only remaining question is how long and actively he’s been in on Putin’s con. That such a destructive, incompetent, addled and compromised fool got within a country mile of the fucking White House points to national security failures as vast as those that allowed the 9/11 attacks to happen and enabled Cheney & Co. to falsely portray Saddam Hussein’s Potemkin nukes as an existential threat.

Like those monumental fuck-ups, I suspect the lapse that allowed a malignant orange clown to seize personal control of the world’s most fearsome nuclear arsenal was more a failure of imagination than a lack of dedication or skill, particularly on the part of the people doing the actual work. In other words, it was a strategic cock-up rather than a tactical one. But yeah, we’re gonna need a truth and reconciliation panel on national security too.

Fox News is Radio Rwanda

Is that hyperbolic? Maybe. But listen (if you can bear it) to this clip from the Blonde with Two Boobs on a Couch* from this morning:

Partial transcript:

“A few things really hit home, when you think about how hard YOU work, trying to put food on the table, many folks go to a job they don’t like, and then you look at the numbers, and you’re spending about $80K…over the course of one of those illegal’s lifetime to keep them here in the United States — you’re paying for them, and you’re working hard to pay for them. Then you look at the numbers of people that are doing illegal drugs here. A lot of the drugs are coming from the southern border, and the president highlighted that last night.

And then you hear him talk about, he said, “Imagine if this were your child that was killed by an illegal alien” because we hear Kate Steinle’s parents and the parents of, the fire chief parents, in Knoxville, Tennessee, their young son was killed by a suspected illegal immigrant, and you hear about Officer Singh in California…the president highlighted the Air Force veteran who was raped and murdered and beaten to death by an illegal alien. He talked about the Georgia illegal alien that killed his neighbor and beheaded him and dismembered him, he talked about the MS-13 gang members in Maryland who are unaccompanied minors who were arrested and charged with stabbing and beating a 16-year-old girl.

You hear all of that, and you wonder why Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer are calling this, are saying it’s immoral to build a wall, they’re saying it’s not a crisis. Look at the video! Listen to the numbers!”

It’s no coincidence that Trump and Fox & Friends name-checked states from coast to interior to coast. They want to incite fear and loathing from sea to shining sea. Fox & Friends is Twitler’s favorite program, and together they form a continuous feedback loop of hate.

Anyhoo, Ainsley Earhardt, ladies and gents — a Leni Riefenstahl minus talent serving a fuhrer without brains. Let us hope their incompetence and stupidity contain the damage.

*H/T: Adam

Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Here’s Badger looking all bad-ass:

If my area of Florida is destroyed by a hurricane next summer and Trump tours this neighborhood, I know my Badger would sink his fangs into the shitgibbon’s nutsack if he wandered onto our property. Badger has heard Mom and Dad cursing at the Bad Man on TV all his life!

And he’ll hear it again this evening. We’ll definitely tune into the carnival of stupid. You?

I’m looking forward to the Chuck and Nancy rebuttal. And while I generally despise it when pundits — especially neocons! — suggest what Democrats should say in a given situation, J-Rub’s suggestions here are pretty damned on point, IMO. “It’s the lying, stupid!”

Also, a little bird told me that if you want to watch a shouty, finger-wagging rebuttal by a non-Democrat, such a spectacle will be streamed live for your viewing pleasure. That I will skip.

Anyhoo, open thread!