Cloud Compass Canoeing

If not for the bow, it would be impossible to say which was the sky and which the reflection.

Also, Badger naps dangerously:

I don’t voluntarily sleep with my nose in such close proximity to Daisy’s ass. She’s a gassy critter.

This thread doesn’t have to be about dog farts. Use your imagination — open thread!

Florida Recount: Ballots Are the New Caravan

I’ve been too busy scraping, sanding, painting, unpacking, rearranging, etc., to pay much attention to what’s happening with the Florida recounts. To be honest, I don’t expect anything to change after the mandatory recounts; my guess is Rick Scott and Ron DeSantis will be certified as the winners of the senate seat and governor’s office and that Democrat Nikki Fried will maintain her lead for ag commissioner — maddeningly the only statewide win by a Democrat in Florida this cycle.

My wingnut county went for the Republicans overwhelmingly, as expected. Local reports say the recounts here are proceeding without controversy. Even the Democratic official overseeing the county recount says he trusts the Republican supervisor of elections to complete the job with integrity.

Contrast that with the screeching from Rick Scott and the orange fart cloud in the White House. Scott has always been a crook and jumped on the Trump bandwagon early. But one thing he’s done that struck me as smart politically was to cast himself as a hardworking, capable businessman rather than a Fox News ideologue, even if that’s what he was all along.

He dropped that ruse this go-round, absurdly (and ironically, given his own shady business history) crying “rampant fraud” before the damned votes were even counted the first time and going on the Hannity show to gin up hysteria and anger about the recounts. It looks orchestrated from the top since Lil’ Marco has irresponsibly joined in.

The orange fart cloud foolishly declared this morning that the ballots in Florida are “massively infected” (ballots are the new caravan) and that officials must stop state law-triggered recounts and declare election night calls the official tally. Real Banana Republican stuff.

Similarly, Scott ordered the state’s department of law enforcement to investigate fraud and was promptly told there’s no fraud to investigate. Their source of that information is the Republican secretary of state. Now Crooked Pam Bondi has joined in, sending a letter of concern to the department of law enforcement (headed by a Scott appointee!) since they declined to join the hysteria. Possibly this is her US AG audition tape, who knows.

It’s Trumpification at the state level. It echoes the dangerous split between career law enforcement employees at the federal level and their duties to citizens that is caused by Trump trying to press them into service as political props and enforcers. No good will come of any of it. It’s not surprising, but it’s dangerous and disturbing.

There’s a “massive infection” alright, but the disease vector isn’t the ballots in South Florida. The opportunistic infection is Trump in a host weakened by Republican parasites. Only their utter defeat will ensure the survival of the patient.

The Latest Coffee Boy

Good God, what an omnishambles of an administration:

How many Scaramucci Units will Whitaker last?

My Pet T-Rex

Did you know some of the founding fathers kept birds as pets and livestock? It’s true — you can read all about it in the Federalist Papers. The right to keep and bear birds is as American as apple pie.

Now, some people claim that the right to keep chickens, parrots, ducks, peacocks, etc., shouldn’t extend to a right to keep and bear a T-Rex that has been cloned from DNA found in blood consumed by a mosquito that was fossilized in amber.

That’s an anti-science way of looking at it. Everyone knows modern birds are descended from dinosaurs like the T-Rex. On a DNA level, there’s very little difference between a parakeet and a T-Rex.

While it’s true that a T-Rex can bite people’s heads off and slaughter dozens in just a few minutes, a parakeet could kill you too, or at least peck out your eye if you didn’t stop it.

Every now and then, someone’s pet T-Rex gets loose and kills a bunch of people. It’s a tragic thing caused entirely by irresponsible T-Rex owners. So why punish responsible, law-abiding T-Rex owners for something they didn’t even do?

Owning a T-Rex is thrilling and manly. Maybe if everyone had their own T-Rex, we wouldn’t have to offer up our thoughts and prayers about these tragedies involving rogue T-Rex owners so frequently.

A T-Rex-armed society is a very polite society. Or at least a very STILL one.

[Image from Chicago Reader.]

Our White Women Problem

I’ve seen a bunch of “WTF, white women?!?” takes today after exit polls showed the majority voted for troglodytes like Kemp, Cruz, DeSantis and Scott. College-educated white women have been a key part of the anti-Trump resistance in many of the suburbs where Democrats won.

But about half of white women — and in some places, distressingly huge majorities of them, if the exit polls are accurate — keep voting for Trump enablers and can eventually be counted on to vote for Trump again.

Martha Crawford, LCSW, tweeted the best explanation for our persistent white women problem that I’ve ever seen. Thread starts here on Twitter. I’ve rendered it in paragraph form below:

I had two maternal figures: Mom divorced in 1974 – lived as a single mother, worked the rest of her life in a gas station and hid immigrant workers without documents in our basement providing shelter, home medical care and food.

Whoever she was or wasnt she “ran with wolves”

She lived a life that was authentic and a mess and all her own.

My step-mother- extremely conservative, extremely patriarchal- profoundly concerned about status – her own and her sons- told me I was ridiculous to even think of a career when I should “just marry a powerful man”

My step-mother, I heard through the grapevine, (I no longer speak to her directly) voted for Trump – which is what I would have assumed.

It is absolutely unsurprisingly to me that more than half of all white women are like my step-mother.

My mom took wild risks, forsook so many “comforts” turned her back on extraordinary wealth, worked as a manual laborer, shopped for shoes and clothes at the swap meet, her car was always breaking down. She was often afraid.

But she died without any regrets at all.

My step-mother made choices consistently organized around security and power for herself and her biological off-spring, sons.

Her “power” came was vicarious power – and if you add up their assets and belongings. -their medical care and comforts- my step-mother came out ahead.

My point is that a large number of these 54% of white women are completely enmeshed with the supremacy of white men – their very comforts rest upon it.

My mother gave up EVERYTHING to flee from it – and struggled in freedom- for the rest of her life.

My mother’s choices and outcomes CONFIRMED my step-mothers in her mind.

We arent every going to peel those white women away from the desire for dominance for their husbands and sons.

Freedom can costly. If you have no inherent drive for it – it is a very hard sell.

We arent going to convince them that freedom and sharing is a purer way to live if it costs them their meat freezer in the garage, their speedboat and their membership at the club.

We have to build our coalition with less than half of white women – they like their comfy cages

Resign yourself to that “more than half of white women” uphold oppression. They have found ways to make their own disempowered lives quite comfy with layers and layers of vicarious power.

They don’t yearn for freedom at all. They find it repellant.

There is a lot more I could say – but cannot say about all the many oppressive outcomes that grew out of my step-mother’s choices, the power her sons gathered, the expanding generational oppressions that emerged out of her comfortable embrace of white patriarchy.

All expectable

White patriarchy keeps its women close by rewarding them.

Liberation offer no regularly scheduled feedings.

To get white women to reject freedom all you have to do is gild the cage.

They will prefer to be first in line for table scraps, hoarding all the resources they can, rather than ever forage themselves

And they will see the authentic challenges and complexities of liberation as PROOF that they are safer in their indentured contract.

lots of typos as always – but hopefully you get the jist.

I think it is important that we stop “being surprised” by this.

It is a dilemma as old as the hills. It is not surprising at all. Not one bit.

Interestingly, I happened to notice that I lost followers as a result of this thread.

I guess we know who left.

I’ve left lots of such people behind more times than I can count – and like my mother, I’ve never regretted it.

I also had a fiercely independent mother who took risks and made her own way, and I have a stepmom who scurries to the fridge to fetch a refill when my father rattles the ice cubes in an empty glass at her. Maybe that’s why this rang so true to me.

Crawford is right. We’ll have to build our coalition with less than half of white women. The majority won’t be coaxed from their gilded cages, not even if you lock them in with a revolting pig like Trump.

Hate them or pity them, but for the love of God, don’t count on them. I’m embarrassed it took me until 2016 to fully figure that shit out.

Allow me to explain…

I can help you out there, Laura. Here’s why I’m feeling a little doomy and gloomy: This mouth-breathing, quarter-witted, mini-Trump motherfucker will be my new governor:

And this Skeletor-looking, Medicare fraud-sucking motherfucker will join Marco Fucking Rubio to rep me and mine in the US Senate:

It’s true that the results are pretty close to what was predicted nationwide. And there are many genuine bright spots, including the defeat of odious Scott Walker, awful Karen Handel, treasonous Dana Rohrabacher and obnoxious Dave Brat.

But this shouldn’t have been a normal, predictable election, not with Mango Mussolini lying nonstop about America being overrun with fictional brown hordes and directly inspiring multiple deadly hate crimes within weeks of the vote. Not with a smirking crook like Brian Kemp openly rigging an election in his own favor.

America had a chance to resoundingly reject Trumpism. It had the opportunity to tell a party that has fully embraced racist demagoguery to go fuck itself, and it sent mild regrets instead. That’s not enough.

We’ll press on, of course. No choice. And it’s truly a wonderful thing to regain control of the House. I look forward to watching Paul Ryan pass the gavel to Nancy Smash. I’m thrilled that Democrats will chair committees that will issue subpoenas to expose this thoroughly corrupt administration. I’m relieved that Trump’s House stooges can no longer interfere with Mueller’s investigation.

But it’s going to take me a few days to stop feeling sick about what could have been. Please bear with me.


I should just shut the fuck up about what’s going to happen in tomorrow’s election because I was wrong wrong wrong in 2016. On the basis of that wrongness alone, I have no business predicting the outcomes of elections, just as Bill Kristol should be forever banned from opining on Middle Eastern wars of choice.

And besides, maybe jinxes are really a thing? Nah, I don’t believe in that either. Okay, here’s the thing: I feel really optimistic about tomorrow.

I’m not telling anyone but y’all because I know you’d all crawl over broken glass and swim through gator-infested swamps to vote for Democrats. There’s absolutely no danger of you saying, “Well, Betty Cracker, who predicted a landslide victory for President Hillary Clinton, says it’s in the bag, so no need for me to vote!”

You won’t do that, so I feel free to say that I think we’ll have a huge win tomorrow, despite the maps that are not in our favor, the cheating, the demagoguery, etc. I just had to tell someone.

Take it with a dump truck-load of salt, friends. I know you will, dog bless your cynical, battered and wounded hearts. That is all. Open thread!

ETA: Obligatory Badger pic as requested:

The dummy tried to taste the freshly painted wall yesterday, so I had the pleasure of scrubbing yellow paint off his black lower lip. Neither of us was entertained by the exercise.