Anne Laurie has already mentioned the Pets on Newt 2012 (#maynotbeitsactualname) website.
You may not know it is now up and running. I stumbled upon it today and need to share it with you, because I am a vengeful old cow. I will excerpt the relevant parts, for those of you who don’t want to give Newt the hits.
The very first thing you see is this:
If someone could tell me what species of lemurs those are on Newt, I’d be delighted. I couldn’t find the information on his website, presumably because latinate binomial nomenclature is the work of Satan and his helper Darwin – although it may be because I have been in Amsterdam for three days. Draw your own conclusions about my mental state.
I could go to wikipedia to identify the furry little fuckers, but frankly I can’t be fucked.
I do feel sorry for the poor, adorable things. The one perched on Newt’s hand is clearly working out how to get the fuck off the Gingrich bandwagon as soon as possible, while the one on his shoulder has given up entirely and is refusing to do anything but show its arse to the world. Meanwhile, Newt (depending on what music you play in your head) looks either:
(a) terrified that the rat-thing he holds in his hand is going to piss on him, then claw its way up his arm and scratch his eyes out; or
(b) like Benny Hill eyeing off a particularly juggulous pair of boobs two seconds before being sprung by a policeman with an inflatable hammer, two half-naked nurses with blond bobs and a man in a polar bear suit. Wackiness ensues.
You are going to have to draw your own analogies with the Gingrich campaign. See above, in re “can’t be fucked”. Read more