Late Night ‘News of the Weird’ Open Thread

Let’s be fair: The programmers behind this stunt are, statistically, liable to be lousy dancers themselves. We won’t even discuss their concept of ‘popular music’…

Trumpworld Stupidity Open Thread: Another Trial Balloon Made of the Finest Lead

Her hometown paper says Nikki Haley may be up to a million dollars in debt — being UN Ambassador is an expensive hobby! — and (Murphy the Trickster God willing) it’s not gonna be anywhere near as easy to cash in on Trump ‘contacts’ after the midterm elections. And the CREW people are complaining that she took private flights paid for by SC business executives, which would be unseemly for a government executive but not a professional lobbyist.

But, hey, the Oval Office Occupancy will never let a potential publicity/grifting opportunity go to waste!…

Politico is on it!

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Kavanaught Open Thread: A Lot Can Happen in A Week…

There’s an old parable about a philospher, condemned to death, who obtains a stay of execution by persuading the king that, given time, he can teach the king’s favorite horse to talk. When the philosopher’s friends ask him why he would make such an outrageous promise, he says, A lot can happen in that time. I could die naturally; or the king might die, and then my sentence would waived. Or perhaps the horse might talk!

The horse (derrière) in today’s iteration would be Brett Kavanaugh. While the FBI takes a week — or whatever — to investigate the allegations against him as his victims have always asked, McConnell might find a lever to pry the nomination loose for an equally revanchist but less blatantly compromised candidate. Or King Donald might decide to demand… something that will require the GOP senators to rejigger. Or perhaps the loving family and strong band of friends that Kavanaugh cited will look at the video of his disgraceful performance yesterday and perform an intervention to get him into locked-door treatment for anger management…

But then again, look at the takeaway from Matt Schlapp:

Our Failed Legacy Media Open Thread: Infinite, Fractal, Recursive Fvckup-ery!

Fortunately, the attempt to defenestrate Rod Rosenstein seems to be going nowhere — for the moment. But what in the name of Murphy the Trickster God could the NYTimesmen responsible for starting this rumor have been thinking?

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Post-Racial Open Thread: “Well, He Never Called ME That Name… “

The scramble to (once again) cover up the sorry truth that the Oval Office Occupant is a lifelong racist (BUT IF HE DIDN’T USE THE N-WORD IT DOESN’T COUNT!, goes the ritual incantation) is stirring up even the most sluggis bottom feeders…

Because they can’t be sure there isn’t a tape… and that is a depth to which even the professional Repub Defenders would prefer not to sink. Per the Washington Post:

Asked whether there is a tape anywhere of Donald Trump using the n-word, as former White House aide Omarosa Manigault Newman has claimed, White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders pointedly and repeatedly declined to rule it out. At one point she even said, “I can’t guarantee anything.”

White House spokespeople have occasionally emphasized that denials were coming from the president and not from them personally — apparently not wanting another false denial to damage their own credibility — but on Tuesday it was crystal-clear exactly what was happening. Sanders, like others in President Trump’s orbit, including Kellyanne Conway, wanted no part of ruling out the president having used such a racial slur, just in case there is actually a tape…

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