A cabbage, a fox, a male legislator who refuses to be alone with a woman at any time, and a woman just trying to do her job are trying to cross a river. In what order should you move them across?
— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) July 11, 2019
no one wins!!!
— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) July 11, 2019
some words from the cabbage https://t.co/rMTi87bbQm
— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) July 11, 2019
… You understand, I have this horrible condition. I have had it for years. I am incapable of seeing women as people. It used to be possible to get by in political life in this country with this condition. You would just move around a smoky room, speaking only to men, and you could have a nice career. But now, oh, these things, these things are everywhere. Holding elected office, performing jobs, playing soccer! You must understand my agony when I behold this. So much good meat, delicious meat, wonderful meat —
It is with difficulty that I shamble into the company of people every day. It is with difficulty that I convince people that I am, after all, a human being, not a wild animal, the mad, helpless victim of an uncontrollable lust. I cannot, I dare not — oh, it is with difficulty that I write these words now, knowing a woman may read them. The mere thought of my words moving before her unprotected eyes sends me into a frenzy. Ffffffft rrrrrrrrr graaarrrfll rrrrrr…
Do not let me out of the house! Or if I am so honored to be elected by you the people, the governor’s mansion!
But. Seriously. Petri’s Washington Post colleague, Alyssa Rosenberg:
… Foster’s quickness to condemn the discussion of his decision as a communist plot to bring down America lends the merest hint that his intentions here were less about preserving the sanctity of his marriage and more about ginning up the sort of culture war controversy that could be a boon to his campaign fundraising…
Part of what made Foster’s request to Campbell seem disingenuous is that it would be somewhat unusual for any candidate to be alone with any reporter under any circumstances, much less a whole day that includes a long ride… Fortunately for Foster, he has a male campaign director, Colton Robison, who would presumably be going on this day-long trip anyway to keep an eye on things…
And yet I’ll bet there are internet mischief-lovers already scouring Foster’s browser history for… clues. Two wetsuits and a dildo? Farm animal abuse? Murphy the Trickster God is the patron of Rule 34…
I feel pretty good odds some future arrest story will definitely have the phrase “previously best known for his refusal to be interviewed by a female journalist unchaparoned.” pic.twitter.com/WbJdpGjQjX
— Schooley (@Rschooley) July 11, 2019
Friday Evening Semi-Respite Open Thread: Just Another Jeebus-Humpin’ Repub…Post + Comments (78)