Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe.

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

This fight is for everything.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

‘Forty-two’ said Deep Thought, with infinite majesty and calm.

Good luck with your asparagus.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

No one could have predicted…

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

The willow is too close to the house.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Cillizza, who will never be asked to bring the noodle salad to the mensa picnic…

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

You are here: Home / Archives for Betty Cracker

Florida woman, boxer wrangler and football hooligan currently deep-fat frying something in a humid swamp somewhere.

Betty Cracker has been a Balloon Juice writer since 2012.

Squishable Morning Open Thread

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Say you’re a flack for an organization that’s weathering a PR nightmare. For example, you represent a canned beans company, and a customer posted a viral TikTok of finding a dead rat in a can of your beans. You know a rival organization plans a high-profile media attack that includes a rat-free beans ad.

So, what’s your strategy? Maybe you’d line up your best spokespeople to offer a counter narrative. Perhaps you’d skip town and keep quiet, hoping the whole thing blows over.

What you probably wouldn’t do is let the most clownish dopes in your organization lead the response. But that’s what the Republican Party did yesterday. Via Rolling Stone:

Reps. Matt Gaetz (R-Fla.) and Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) don’t feel too bad about what happened on Jan. 6. The far-right lawmakers on Thursday hosted what they described as the Republican “response” to a slate of Democratic events commemorating the anniversary of the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol.

Predictably, they said some really dumb, damaging things. They downplayed the mayhem Trump supporters caused and made wild accusations, such as that the FBI fomented the riot.

But in this case, it’s hard to imagine the seemingly poor crisis communications strategy causing a ripple. Gaetz and Greene, two of the most odious individuals in Congress, are echoing the twice-impeached, two-time popular vote loser who is their party’s leader. Also, their message isn’t appreciably crazier than what up-and-coming party leaders like Ron DeSantis are saying.

It all makes sense when you know the Republican Party isn’t selling a product to a broad consumer base, something like canned beans. The rat is the product.

Open thread.

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Don’t go away mad…

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Just go the fuck away:

Third statement! Trump’s smarter sociopathic clone DeSantis is slamming the “New York DC media” for “milking January 6” to “smear” Trump supporters. So the Trumpers perceive Biden’s speech and the ongoing media coverage as an attack. Good. That confirms my perception that Biden gave the right speech and the MSM is striking the right tone.

Sort of related, Josh Marshall published some thoughts yesterday about whether or not deplatforming Trump and refusing to amplify his comments in the media is a negative or positive for the deposed demagogue:

It’s become doctrine for many right-thinking people that people shouldn’t “amplify” what Trump is saying. That only does his work for him, we’re told. This is the logic that got him booted off social media. But if what Benjy says is right, this state of affairs, which has clearly driven Trump to distraction, has also proved almost the best of all possible worlds for him. Trump’s supporters hear his message loud and clear: through NewsMax, OANN, talk radio, Facebook and to a significant degree on Fox News. But for the rest of the political world it’s muffled. So the horror and craziness of Trumpism recedes from public consciousness while people are focused on the day to day imperfection of the Biden presidency.

This hasn’t made Trump any weaker. His hold over the institutional and electoral GOP has only intensified since leaving office. The very small number of elected officials who refused to support the Big Lie have mostly been drummed out of the party. Trump’s Big Lie propaganda has become unassailable in heavily state-legislative-gerrymandered states where it will matter most. In short, the “don’t amplify” doctrine has allowed Trump to speak freely to his supporters and intensify his hold over the GOP, while keeping the incendiary messages that mobilize a majority of the country against him largely off mainstream airwaves.

All of the upside and none of the down.

Marshall concedes there are other ways to look at it, but he may have a point given the fragmented media environment. We all hoped the orange fart cloud would dissipate, and in a way, he did. As I’ve mentioned here before, when Trump got kicked off Twitter, it felt like an airhorn that had been blowing in my face for four years suddenly fell silent. I didn’t follow the shit-stain, but he was inescapable.

But the airhorn is still blaring on the propaganda outlets, and its odious source still controls one of the two viable political parties in this country. That matters. I don’t know what will happen next or which is the right approach on this specific issue. What do y’all think?

Open thread.

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1/6 Accountability Update

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Stephanie Grisham was Trump’s press secretary for just a few Scaramuccis before being fired and then taking on the role of Melania Trump’s chief of staff. The latter job must have been every bit as challenging as babysitting a potted fern.

But Grisham was in the White House when the insurrection went down, and perhaps she’s the source of the firsthand accounts of Trump’s activities Liz Cheney alluded to on last week’s Sunday shows. Today, Grisham will visit the 1/6 committee, per CNN:

Former White House press secretary Stephanie Grisham will meet Wednesday evening on Capitol Hill with the select committee investigating the January 6 insurrection, according to multiple sources familiar with the meeting.

Grisham’s meeting with the committee came after the former White House aide and chief of staff to first lady Melania Trump had a phone call with committee member, Democratic Rep. Jamie Raskin of Maryland, during which Raskin encouraged her to meet with the panel.

A source tells CNN that Grisham and Raskin had in-depth phone call about her knowledge of events behind-the-scenes at the White House on January 6. The source told CNN that Grisham was “candid” about events in the White House at the time, many of which Grisham was present for, including knowledge of conversations involving former President Donald Trump that day.

Grisham resigned in protest after 1/6, and IIRC, she’s made critical noises about the Trumps ever since, so it’s not surprising she’s willing to spill the tea. Good.

Between Grisham’s cooperation, Meadows’ generosity with texts before belatedly clamming up, and coup plotters helpfully outlining their strategies on TV, maybe the committee can piece the larger story together.

Meanwhile, it’s not just Do Something Twitter criticizing AG Garland’s handling of the investigation into the attempted coup; Rep. Ruben Gallego (D-Arizona) is fed up too:

I have no idea if Gallego’s criticisms of Garland are on point or not. But I share his urgency about addressing the “ongoing, slow coup” taking place in legislatures, boards of elections and recorders offices.

Garland is speaking about the January 6th attack at 2:30 ET. I’ll add a live stream if no one else does and/or I’m not busy cleaning up puppy shit. It should be fascinating.

Open thread!

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Hill Squawking (Open Thread)

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As we know, Chuck Schumer scheduled a debate on doing a filibuster carveout to pass voting rights this month. When reporters asked for his thoughts about the prospect of reform, Joe Manchin disemboweled a sacrificial animal and read the steaming entrails to divine his own opinion:

“Being open to a rules change that would create a nuclear option,* it’s very, very difficult. It’s a heavy lift,” Manchin told reporters when asked about using the “nuclear option,” in which Democrats would change the 60-vote legislative filibuster on their own.

“I’m talking. I’m not agreeing to any of this. … I want to talk and see all the options we have open,” Manchin said, adding that it was his “preference” that any rule changes have Republican support.

Blah blah blah. No one but his donors know what that lunkhead will do. Chuck Schumer either doesn’t know or is dissembling:

Hopefully he’s right since our democracy literally depends on it. Let’s also hope the president weighs in early and often in this fight. The bully pulpit has its limits, but it’s not nothing.

Meanwhile, Mitch McConnell continued to NOT spontaneously combust and then run screaming and in flames in panicked circles under the Rotunda before collapsing into a smoldering heap due to white hot hypocrisy despite labeling the attempt to create a filibuster carveout to protect elections “genuine radicalism.” He also said this:

Good on Semrau for adding that very salient context. As I shared in a comment in the morning thread, I’m not super optimistic that we’ll get voting reform done. But we’ve got to try.

Open thread.

*PS: Fuck whoever came up with the term “nuclear option.” And fuck Manchin for repeating it in this context. I’d have more respect for the man if he said, “Look, the people who funnel millions of dollars into my (and my family’s) pockets think it’s better for business if the US Senate is paralyzed, so the filibuster stays.”

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Just like Jackie…

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In the morning thread, valued commenter Jim, Foolish Literalist drew our attention to a first in U.S. history* — the former escort** who is also a former first lady is hawking a pre-owned hat online:

Just like Jackie...

It is described as “The White Broad-Brimmed, High Blocked Crown Hat”*** that was worn during a state visit with France and will be signed by the Third Lady herself. (Probably with a Sharpie.) Other items to be auctioned include possibly another white hat (or maybe the same one; it’s not altogether clear without clicking through, and fuck that), plus a watercolor by some French guy because why not?

Some commenters speculated the Third Lady may be trying to raise funds to escape The Beast. She’s every bit as horrible as he is, but that doesn’t mean they don’t despise each other, so maybe that’s why she launched Head of State QVC and NFT-grift-o-rama. (Tempted to add “I REALLY DON’T CARE DO U?” but that’s been done to death.)

No matter what ultimately becomes of the republic, we’ll always bear the degradation of the Trump grifters’ tacky spectacle and tawdry fingers all over the U.S. presidency. That’s a shame. Still, it’s a nice touch that the Third Lady is hawking these wares on a platform from which her odious husband is still banned.

Open thread!

* As far as I know. 

** No disrespect intended toward escorts. Unless they are Fords. 

*** Why the hyphen between broad-brimmed but not high blocked?

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Evolve. Adapt.

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Schumer lets Senate Dems know they’ll “debate and consider changes to Senate rules on or before January 17, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, to protect the foundation of our democracy: free and fair elections.”

Good. If Manchin and Sinema (and possibly others) value the filibuster over democracy itself, let that position be on the record. Republicans have already made their choice, and time is growing short.

Open thread.

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Revenge of the Flight Attendant (Open Thread)

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Drunk, nicotine-deprived, anti-mask rage-baby picked the wrong flight crew to abuse:

The duct tape sound effects were particularly enjoyable. This flight attendant should be on all the planes.

UPDATE: The commentary section of the video is a spoof from a comedian. But there really was a drunk idiot who got duct-taped to his seat.

Open thread!

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