I’m not saying most #NFTs are scams operated by grifters and money launderers. I’m just saying Melania Trump is launching an #NFT.
— Richard Hine (@richardhine) December 16, 2021
Alexandra Petri, at the Washington Post — “Melania Trump’s new NFT is the perfect holiday g(r)ift”:
… From the family that bought you An Organization That Will Give Some Undetermined Amount of Money to Children’s Cancer, But Mostly Won’t, and the malign, sentient random-word generator that produces all headlines now, comes: Melania Trump’s New NFT Platform!
Do you want to give to a charity, but not too much? Do you understand NFTs, but not too much? Well, rest easy: “Melania Trump is pleased to announce the Melania Trump non-fungible token (NFT) platform, which will release NFTs in regular intervals exclusively on MelaniaTrump.com.”…
You know, initially I was a little worried there might be something not entirely aboveboard about Melania Trump’s new NFT venture, which also claims it will somehow provide children from foster care with computer science skills. (Are the NFT platform programmers children? I assume they aren’t, but also this is not not how you would word it if you were trying to discreetly inform the public that your programmers are children.) But now that I know they are selling amulets, I am utterly reassured!…
“A portion of the proceeds” (definitely doesn’t need to be more specific!) “will assist children aging out of the foster care system by way of economic empowerment and with expanded access to resources needed to excel in the fields of computer science and technology.” Once again, I do not think, from the way this is worded, that you can rule out that Melania Trump has hired a specific child as her computer programmer and this is how she is describing paying their salary and letting them use a computer to set up her website…
At least it doesn’t seem to be as heinously ugly as those Bored Ape thingies…
Resale royalty 100%? Lmao pic.twitter.com/6TRr7nwbI3
— Funk S◎L Brother ☀️ (@witheredwizard) December 16, 2021
Who knew Kenau Reeves would turn out to be the smart one?
Keanu Reeves’ reaction to this question about NFTs is priceless.pic.twitter.com/xlDnaZo8Og
— Dare Obasanjo (@Carnage4Life) December 10, 2021
Actual king shit pic.twitter.com/G32PLC6HHH
— BENJI ???? / Holiday patrol (@AllNewBenji) December 14, 2021
nfts didn’t even exist a year ago i think people can probably still live a more or less full life without spending $400,000 on a hideous ape jpg
— flglmn (@flglmn) December 16, 2021
prostratedragon
For a pioneer of the “X shopping days til Christmas” tactic. Where is he now?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
My takeaway from the Melanie story is that she thinks she’s gonna (or at the very least may) need an independent income stream in the not-too-distant future. I know she renegotiated her pre-nup before agreeing to move to DC in 2017, but I wonder how much of old Fred’s money, the real money, is tied up in trusts with some kind of “descendants only” language
I have a vague feeling that someday I might need to understand crypto, but I can totally, now and forever, ignore the NFT thing, right? I mean, if Vanguard establishes and NFT fund and my guy tells me to put 5% in there, I will, but other than that, this is like Beanie Babies and Pokeemons and Gamestop?
schrodingers_cat
Digital art but not NFT
Leto
Anyone who doesn’t think he simply played himself in Bill & Ted? :p
He’s a genuinely smart, compassionate person who does a ton of good things simply because he can. Understand, and to a certain point agree, the criticism about his “acting”, but he’s def on point about this. There’s a reason he’s a beloved figure around most of the internet.
SiubhanDuinne
Just trying to picture Michelle Obama……
Baud
I’m starting to wonder whether I made a mistake putting my entire 401k into NFTs.
cthulhu
Interesting way to start a sentence: “Regardless of how valid the criticisms are…”
Leto
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: I have my Garbage Pail Kids cards all in plastic and at the ready to offload for my post 62 retirement fund.
Baud
@schrodingers_cat:
Why isn’t it an NFT? You could probably get at least six figures.
prostratedragon
@prostratedragon: That is, Charlie Mole.
Scout211
In non NFT news, but Open Thread news: The FDA just announced that they are lifting the ban on mail order prescriptions for medical abortions.
germy
germy
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@germy: is that Navarro from Bannon’s podcast today?
I wonder what the J6 Committee, and Bannon’s lawyers, thought of that
Geminid
Christmas is now only nine days away, and Boxing Day is ten. I am wishing again for a special Boxing Day “Regrifting” post.
Ken
No, because with those you would at least end up with a stuffed animal, card game, or shares of a penny stock. With NFTs you get nothing. (Insert GIF of Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka yelling at Charlie.)
Leto
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: please proceed,
dirtbagshitheel.Ken
@cthulhu: Reminiscent of this xkcd.
SpaceUnit
It’s going to be the Merriest Griftmas ever!
Seriously, every fool who lines up to toss their money at this dipshit clan of two-bit hucksters and carnival barkers deserves to get taken to the cleaners. Hopefully it will be an education.
Ken
That could be fun. Imagine the suits and countersuits as the various spawn try to force the others to take DNA tests, and the inventive reasons they give for refusing.
germy
One can only imagine…
Raoul Paste
This seems like a good opportunity to complain about Matt Damon hawking Cryptocurrency on television
” They drove a dump truck full of money onto my driveway. I’m not made of stone…”
Chief Oshkosh
@Baud:
Wattamaroon! Everyone knows that that’s last Thursday’s strategy. If you want to REALLY profit, you have to subscribe to my newsletter to find out what THIS week’s strategy is! Operators are standing by!
Old Man Shadow
The bare minimum they will be required to give by law.
Lord Fartdaddy (Formerly, Mumphrey, Smedley Darlington Mingobat, et al.)
A “portion of the proceeds,” huh? I’m guessing that “portion” is 0
Who else is with me on this?
Old Man Shadow
@Leto: I think we were all a bit suspicious of the Zen personality after Steven Seagal adopted it while simultaneously being a stupid asshole.
VeniceRiley
@Baud: The real money is in lending your NFT out with interest, I’m told. /s
Frosty Fred
@schrodingers_cat:
An image from my youth.
Ken
@Lord Fartdaddy (Formerly, Mumphrey, Smedley Darlington Mingobat, et al.): No, I agree with Petri: “Melania Trump has hired a specific child as her computer programmer”. Also remember that one of the few “charitable donations” made by the Trump Foundation before its… troubles was a $7 payment to the Boy Scouts the year that Junior joined, which happened to be exactly the amount of the enrollment fee. So I’m guessing the “child” is Bannon.
Fair Economist
@Raoul Paste:
That campaign slogan stinks, too. “Fortune favors the brave” – meaning getting a credit card that can draw from your crypto assets, destroying the only meaningful benefit from a crypto wallet, which is improved online security? Oh, and with obviously ponzi-style cashback percentages?
mrmoshpotato
@germy:
LOL! Throw yourself into the Sun, Pete.
mrmoshpotato
@Raoul Paste:
And on YouTube. And I beat you to the punch by at least a week. :)
Yeah, WTF? Matt, are you broke as fuck?
Spanky
@SpaceUnit:
Narrator:” It never is.”
Spanky
Barron.
ETA: Okay, Okay. Beat to it again.
SpaceUnit
The Trumps’ outreach to children in foster care sounds about as legit as the Jeffery Epstein program for wayward teens.
Those kids will probably be sold into slavery to the Saudis.
Raoul Paste
@mrmoshpotato: okay, this topic has already been beaten to death, but probably without the Krusty the Clown quote
So there
Doug R
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
All of Fred’s money, including the chips he bought to prop up donnie’s casino is GONE.
Why do you think the trumps were acting like they were broke until the Russians “lent” them piles of money? Because they were.
Anoniminous
All you really need to know about American’s grasp of science and technology:
67% of Americans reject the actual Theory of Evolution. (source: Pew Research)
So they are ripe for any flim-flam scam
Elon Muska huckster is pushing. Melanoma is only One More grifter a’comin’ through the rye.Leto
@Old Man Shadow: understandable, but if you (general “you”) spent even five minutes reading anything about Keanu, you’d know he’s pretty much the anti-Segal. He recognizes how fortunate he’s been in life, and has tried to pay it forward/give back.
https://www.ladbible.com/news/celebrity-keanu-reeves-is-a-not-so-secret-charitable-badass-20181215.amp.html
dmsilev
@germy: The “best-spoken” First Lady stole large chunks of the text for her first big speech from her predecessor. It went downhill from there.
WaterGirl
I am not the least bit sorry to hear that NFTs are over!
Comrade Colette
@mrmoshpotato:
Tell me I’m wrong.
Anoniminous
@Old Man Shadow:
Context: I am absolutely, violently, allergic to American celebrity knob-slobbing.
Statement: Kenau Reeves is actually a Good Guy.
Alison Rose
I still don’t understand the point of NFTs. I don’t. Understand. The point. Who gives a single solitary fuck who “owns” a freaking pic on the internet??????? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ugh kill me.
Spanky
@Alison Rose: The point is that some tech dudes came up with a new scheme to fleece the rubes. Not really a new scheme, but they dressed it up in tech-talk to impress, well, the rubes.
It’s a scam, and that’s all the point you need to know.
Baud
Does anyone know why that interviewer was talking to Keanu about NFTs?
Comrade Colette
@Alison Rose: Yeah, I’m with you. The blinding stupidity of both NFTs and cryptocurrency have me constantly hopping up and down pointing out that the Emperor is completely fuckin’ NAKED. How can everyone not see this?
Baud
I can’t believe I used to give away dick pics for free.
Idiot!
Kalakal
For those who would like to see the criminal waste of skin that is Boris Johnson get it in the neck keep an eye on the result of the North Shropshire bye election tonight/early tomorrow. If the Tories lose or it’s very close the toads toast status goes from crispy to cremated in an instant. Uk constituencies have roughly 70,000 voters, last election the Tories had a majority of 23,000, they have been in control of the constituency for 188 years out of its 190 year history. The exit poll was ‘too close to call’.
WaterGirl
When I hear words like “NFT” or “cryptocurrency” or “neoliberal” I just tune it out. I am like the dog in the Far Side cartoon who hears “blah blah blah Ginger! blah blah blah Ginger!
Alison Rose
@Spanky: I’m baffled as to how so many people eat this stuff up.
Alison Rose
@Comrade Colette: Right????
Baud
@Kalakal:
Exciting! I’m sure out resident Brits will comment on it soon.
Baud
OT, via Reddit. Cool CRT art.
https://i.redd.it/g7olvk3i7z581.jpg
Another Scott
@Alison Rose: You don’t own the picture. You own a token that the artist sold. It’s a 21st Century Modern Way to give money to people.
I think of it as kinda like gifting/naming/owning a star or an asteroid or a goat.
The bottom line for me with these things is always – if they’re such great investments, why aren’t the hucksters buying them all up??
Cheers,
Scott.
Leto
@Alison Rose: so in a simple context, it would give proof of ownership to an original image. Unlike a Rembrandt, a digital work of art isn’t a physical object. So if you purchase a work, how do you know it’s 1) the original and 2) the only one? On the surface, an NFT would be “proof of purchase”.
“I have the original, you have a copy.”
But that’s not what’s happening here. In fact, you have thief’s stealing artists work from their pages, claiming ownership, selling it with the NFT, and absconding with the money. Or like with the stupid ape pics, just a bunch of shitty pics being hyped up with FOMO baked in.
NFTs had a chance to be useful, but within about 5 seconds of introduction, turned into another shit grifter scheme.
Leto
@Alison Rose: FOMO, fear of missing out. People read about crypto dorks who are millionaires just from… nothing. People want in on that. I think for a lot of people it’s like the stock market. Just “invest” and you’ll be rich!!!
Steeplejack (phone)
@Baud:
Very cool.
Anoniminous
Like blockchain NFT started out as a not very well thought-out solution to a very real problem. The Internet is gutting the ability of content providers: artists, musicians, essayists, etc., to make a living. Like blockchain NFT became a scam roughly 3.5 nanoseconds after the idea was launched on the internet.The musicians I know have resigned themselves to the fact they ain’t gonna make diddlysquat with recordings. The actual cash will come from live gigs: ticket sales and ancillary goodies — which includes but is not limited to recordings.
Sure Lurkalot
This is how NFTs work.
WaterGirl
@Anoniminous: I t seems like Patreon is a useful way for artists to bring in some money.
NotMax
@Leto
Still elicits snickers. The Keanu School of Acting.
;)
Shana
@Baud: Probably because the topic seemed somewhat relevant to an actor promoting the latest Matrix movie? That’s all I can come up with.
Nutmeg again
Isn’t Reeve’s GF an actual artist, or curator, or related? In other words, she might actually really know something about art, and the art world. Potentially, she may have shared that knowledge with him!
Other Suzanne
“PT Barnum was right”
(seen on the interwebs)
gwangung
Judge tosses legal protection of Sacklers
raven
@NotMax: The preacher who did my bills funeral played football at Clemson and was Reeve’s stunt double.
raven
@gwangung: Man, that Dopesick is depressing.
Gary K
@VeniceRiley: @Baud: A longer clip reveals that the interviewer was asking them about 10,000 NFTs that had been released in conjunction with “The Matrix Resurrections.” The demand broke the website.
WaterGirl
@gwangung: Great news!
Gary K
One web site I checked out had the Keanu interview video clip playing twice in succession. Perhaps this was a deep comment: Was the first clip the valuable NFT and the second a worthless copy?
Baud
@Gary K:
Oh wow. What were people buying when they bought those NFTs? That seems even dumber than buying an NFT of an ugly monkey.
raven
In case you missed this obit
El Paso, TX—A plus-sized Jewish lady redneck died in El Paso on Saturday.
Of itself hardly news, or good news if you’re the type that subscribes to the notion that anybody not named you dying in El Paso, Texas is good news. In which case have I got news for you: the bawdy, fertile, redheaded matriarch of a sprawling Jewish-Mexican-Redneck American family has kicked it.
gwangung
And it comes to mind that the Sacklers are another example of Leverage making its villains look CLEANER than in real life.
NotMax
Numbskulls For Trump.
Leto
@NotMax: haha, that was good; the SNL Celebrity Jeopardy one was good too.
hueyplong
Since Nov 2016 there is literally no description of stupidity or credulity that I won’t believe.
We’ll see someone limbo under the boldly placed stick of the NFT. Soon
NotMax
FYI. Compiling for dollars.
trnc
If there’s a better example of answering the question you almost asked, I’d love to know what it is.
Another Scott
@Sure Lurkalot: ?
Cheers,
Scott.
Citizen_X
@raven: That was brilliant! Sounds like she was a real firecracker. “Preceded in death by Don Shula,” lol.
Arclite
All of the Keanu anecdotes that pop up from time to time have him marked as a very generous, kind, and thoughtful human being.
Alison Rose
@Another Scott: But with those things, it’s not like literally anyone else on the planet could also have it. Like…I can right-click on a stupid pic or screenshot it & then I have it, too.
PaulB
Yeah, that thread by Anil Dash has to be one of the dumbest things I’ve read this week:
Let’s replace one word, shall we?
Or, perhaps:
Sorry, Anil, but contrary to your confident assertion that, “if the only way thoughtful people engage is by condescending to well-intentioned participants, then we’re all screwed,” no, *we* aren’t “all screwed.” The only ones who are screwed are the “well-intentioned”
foolsparticipants who fall for this scam. The rest of us will be just fine.I don’t have to “engage” with people who are all gung-ho about NFTs any more than I have to “engage” with the victims of people like Bernie Madoff. All I have to do is ignore them, laugh at them, or, more rarely, pity them. My life is otherwise completely unaffected by “web3”, NFTs, crypto-currency, and blockchain technology. And I say this as someone who spent over 30 years in the tech world.
Chbnna
@Anoniminous: this can’t be true…really? What are we hanging on to if it is.
NotMax
FYI. Let the backlash begin.
Another Scott
@Alison Rose: Right. That’s why buying a NFT isn’t like having “ownership” of some jpeg. Anymore than sending $50 to YouOwnThisStar.com gives you ownership of whatever star they say is “yours”. Some other Joe can copy that ugly monkey Jpeg and your having an NFT piece of paper isn’t going to stop them.
Buying an NFT gives you an NFT. It’s not at all clear that it’s tied to anything tangible.
The MITTechnologyReview link above says:
What could go wrong??
Cheers,
Scott.
Anoniminous
@WaterGirl:
I don’t know anyone using Patreon so I can’t say. The people at Girl Genius and wossname at Questionable Content have Patreon links. They also do a lot of huckster rooming at various Cons. They seem (?) do be doing OK. (?)
A friend of mine, a nationally known and multi-prize winning graphic artist, uses Kickstarter for the money he needs to get a book out. The real money comes from sales at the San Diego Comic Con and some through his website.
mrmoshpotato
@Raoul Paste: Haha. Didn’t recognize the Krusty quote.
GregMulka
@mrmoshpotato: As an elder millennial, this is probably my and my cohorts fault for not going to ponderous movie about two meatheads stabbing each other because one of them raped a woman more recently than the other. In a theater. During a pandemic.
Ken
“We’re going back to our original plan of in-game purchase of weapons and upgrades, for which payers — er, players — can use credit cards, direct debit, and some of the more widely-traded cryptocurrencies.”
Ken
I’ll guess Romeo and Juliet.
Citizen Alan
@gwangung: That scream you just heard was from a friend of mine at St. John’s whose LL.M. thesis on 3rd party releases was just invalidated. :)
Ruckus
@Baud:
Charged what yours were worth did you?
Anoniminous
@Chbnna:
I deal with this stuff everyday & it beats my pair of Aces.
China had 4.7 million STEM graduates in 2017, ~80,000 Ph.d.
US graduated 551,067 with 33,759 Ph.d, with some percentage of the latter Chinese.
China is investing $2 trillion (US) in Artificial Intelligence research and development.
The US is spending $1 billion, up from $500,000. Even tossing in the ~$30 billion thrown at AI companies by the private sphere its not that the US is losing the race, the US isn’t even at the track.
Another Scott
@Anoniminous: I don’t think those are the right metrics, myself. They have 1.45B people vs 334M. They should be graduating more and investing more than us. And they are rapidly growing because much of the population still has very low living standards. Google tells me China’s per-capita GDP is $8,840 while the US’s is $56,200. (One can shift those numbers around if one uses purchasing power parity and the like.)
If we try to match them on total graduates or total investment or similar metrics, we’re going to fail. And it’s not necessary. We need to invest enough, and more than we have been. But we need to also not be looking for enemies to try to justify excessive investment in things that have little utility outside DoD.
Apple wasn’t first with a MP3 player, or downloadable music service, or smart phone, or … Sometimes it makes a lot of sense to be a “fast-follower”. Once someone shows that it can be done, then it’s much easier for those who follow. And the pioneers often end up being forgotten. (Philo Farnsworth, anyone?)
Plus, China’s political system constrains (to some extent) the type of free inquiry and invention that is possible in the USA. They’re getting better – no doubt, but we still have lots of advantages. But yes, we need to do more to keep our edge.
My $0.02.
Cheers,
Scott.
Bill Arnold
@mrmoshpotato:
He committed (during the pandemic when he had the POTUS’s and staff’s ears) mass stochastic homicide, which cannot be forgiven. The autocoup work for DJT was similarly unforgivable, Enemy-of-the-United-States of America (grade unforgivable. The world would be a better place if he (voluntarily!) dove into a wood chipper, but we’ll probably have to settle for him going loopier and loopier until he starts drooling too much to be a video show guest, unless he has exposed himself legally.
(I loath that arrogant addled egotistical twit, to be clear.)
(In the first few months of COVID-19 (Jan/Feb at least) he was speaking truth about COVID-19’s potential. (obvious truth, but still) Then he sadly started misreading the research literature and going down rabbit holes, unable to accept corrections or pushbacks.)
q
Tulip bulbs often grow into pretty flowers. NFTs are inherently worthless. I’m surprised that this idiotic trend has taken so long to implode.
GregMulka
@Ken:
https://variety.com/2021/film/news/ridley-scott-blames-millennials-last-duel-flop-1235117654/
billcinsd
@Anoniminous: When have most musicians made money by anything but playing live frequently?
q
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: Tulip Bulbs! That’s the SAFE place where I’ve invested my billions.
NotMax
@billcinsd
Muzak. Also too movie, TV (animated and not), and nowadays gaming soundtracks.
;)
NotMax
@NotMax
FSM only knows how much Paul Anka raked in over the years from writing the theme for The Tonight Show.
;)
Hmd
Nothing about sending bitcoin to a Trump in return for No F Thing could possibly be corrupt.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@NotMax: I did not know that.
dm
In fairness to Anil Dash, he wasn’t talking about NFTs, he was talking about Web3.
I’m not exactly sure what Web3 is beyond vague descriptions of “decentralized means of hosting and distribution in an attempt to get out from under the thumb of Facebook, Google, and their corporate counterparts in China”. But different from the early days of the web somehow.
Blockchain comes into Web3 as a means of establishing validity of claims (by being witnessed by a bunch of people — in the 90s we talked about PGP and its web-of-trust, maybe it’s something like that?). I suppose, maybe, you don’t have DNS root servers, instead you have a DNS where the information is trustable because lots of people attest to its veracity? You can trust Certificate Authorities, not just because they’re the default in your web-browser, but because the blockchain-mediated web-of-trust suggests you can?
But then blockchain brings along the smell of cryptocurrency and NFTs, and that makes the Web3 playground smelly.
Craig
@Leto: Keanu really is a good dude. Really funny too.
Nice Marmot
NFTs are bourgeois Pet Rocks.
Matt McIrvin
“By into our Ponzi scheme now, because yes it will screw you, but it will become the basis of the world economy someday and you’ll be forced to buy in later. And since it’s a Ponzi scheme this will screw you even harder!”
I see a problem with this reasoning.
TheTruffle
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: This is an excellent point. I also wonder if Barron Trump is even mentioned in the will.
Normally, Malaria Trump could hope to go the Kardashian route and simply license her name, but beyond the MAGA crowd, who would want to buy her brand?