One of my biggest regrets was never becoming a dad. In my generation, coming of age in the 50s and 60s, it just wasn't something very available to gay men, even those in couples. But I'm happy I could still be "Uncle George" to so many.
— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) June 20, 2021
I had a fairly warm relationship with my old man, not least because one of his greatest gifts to me was that he admitted, as far back as I could remember, that he wasn’t very good at fatherhood (but he was still willing to give it his best shot). He taught me to love sf, to mock everything, and that taking a three-hour nap after dinner meant you’d be able to stay up for the Twilight Zone and other late-night viewing.
The replies to Mr. Takei’s tweet are mostly heartwarming, and sometimes heartbreaking…
It's ok. Some of the best father figures , aren't their own fathers.
Happy Fathers Day Uncle George❤
My Dad was a fan and we always watched when we had our monthly visit. Thank you for being you pic.twitter.com/gk0USV7TvM
— StickyEpiphany (@EpiphanySticky) June 20, 2021
(Note: Mr. Takei does a lot of voice acting, and I assume that’s where those images are taken from.)
Honus
I had four aunts and two uncles who never married and are just as much fathers and mothers to me and my five siblings as our own dearly loved mother and father. They cared for us, protected us, educated us and loved us. You are a complete person uncle George.
WaterGirl
Hopefully John will put up a Father’s Day post, too, as he usually does.
This is my favorite of all the Father’s Day photos Cole has put up in the past. I can’t believe Devon got in trouble for that, she was just trying to water daddy on what was surely a hot day.
Villago Delenda Est
TFG, greatest loser in the history of the United States, wished a “happy Father’s Day” to “the Radical Left, RINOS, and other Losers of the world. Hopefully, eventually, everyone will come together.”
Yes, asshole, to celebrate over your dead body.
rikyrah
Watching the 1500 m freestyle.
Got another one of those folks.
He is not as deep as Ledecky.
But, Finke came in and the rest of the field couldn’t be seen.
I will say it again…
Can’t see anyone else AT THE OLYMPIC TRIALS ???
John Revolta
I have to admit: Naps are the Key, what is Best in Life. Give in to the Snooze! (You know you want to)
zhena gogolia
Happy Father’s Day, everyone!
I had a great father, a real character. I think about him and talk about him pretty much every day, although he’s been gone for 37 years.
laura
I’m one of those barren aunts and I lean in to the whole role-for the family treasure and the children of our larger family of friends. You show up, you do your best to be a stable loving safe space for the hard stuff that children face. Though my experience may be limited, I’m convinced the kids are alright.
I sure miss my dad today and find comfort in being a loved and wanted child AND the Giants remain in first place- which we would’ve discussed all through today’s game.
Gin & Tonic
My own father passed when I was a relatively young man, so he never got to hold any of my children – I guess just as I never knew a grandfather. I have now lived longer than he did, and have spent lots of time with my two (so far) grandkids, so I am thankful. But thinking that when my father was my age he was dead, is kind of weird.
All the best to those who are, or take on the role of, fathers.
WaterGirl
Anne Laurie, I love your description of your dad. I bet he was a real pistol.
Did the apple fall far from the tree? I think not! :-)
(meant in the nicest possible way)
debbie
@WaterGirl:
Dads can be testy when you least expect it!
Dagaetch
My father never knew his father, who died when my dad was 10 months old. He didn’t really have a father figure in his life. Somehow he turned out to be a pretty great dad, whose example I can only hope to live up to. Think I’ll give him a call and tell him that.
WaterGirl
@Dagaetch: You are so lucky to be able to do that. No doubt you will make his day.
Jeffro
I actually have a (repurposed) t-shirt ready for this, that’s how much I’m looking forward to the day.
zhena gogolia
@Jeffro:
I have a “DUDE GOTTA GO” T-shirt that I just love — it’s all cotton, V-neck, a really nice green color, just a perfect T-shirt. But now I feel I can’t wear it for fear it will be interpreted as referring to Biden!
Danielx
Another reminder, as if it were needed – family is not defined by blood alone (praise be to the one), but those who you take to your heart.
Although actual family can produce some of the best jokes. My father was noted for having a sense of humor so dry it could turn Congo rain forest to Libyan desert. One evening we’re at the traditional dinner table (mom pop my sister and myself). My sister was 14 and possibly more (permanently) annoyed by my 10 year old self than I was with her. Anyhoo she was (to me) showing her superiority by going on about something she had read about Pavlovian conditioning. I rudely interrupted and asked what Pavlov’s dogs had done. Pop looked at me without cracking so much as a curled lip and said “they ate a lot”.
I shut up and my sister sneered.
Apologies if I’ve told that story before.
Ruckus
@Gin & Tonic:
A good buddy of mine for almost 50 yrs will celebrate his 75th birthday this year and will have lived to be older than his dad.
I answered a comment on twitter about Father’s Day with this.
This is my 20th Fathers Day without dad.
30th if you count the Alzheimers.
He taught me how to precision machine metal. He got his employees to teach me to swear. (Not sure that was actually his intention) I did use that once when he almost hit me in the foot with a big spit of chew. And yes that was very disgusting. He taught me how to run a business. And not into the ground, a somewhat important point. He taught me to enjoy what makes you happy. He taught me how to learn, and damn if that one wasn’t one of the most important. He taught me that skin color, language, gender was irrelevant, people are people and you have to respect them so that they can respect you – and you can respect yourself. Most of this was by way of example.
Elizabelle
I had to turn off the CNN special on the roots of the insurrection.
Too much concentrated ugliness and stupidity. No thank you.
It premiered tonight at 9; will be shown several more times.
boatboy_srq
Dad’s been gone a long time now, and I couldn’t get home to leave flowers. My neice and I are estranged. A little late for me to adopt. Best I can do is play the Old Man to my younger coworkers.
Wag
I don’t know who the other three images are, but upper right is The Mandolorian, a Star Wars character who is the protector and father figure for Baby Yoda. I am not aware of any connection to Uncle George.
edit
and George is an amazing man.
HumboldtBlue
I spoke with my 89-year-old dad this morning. We have an interesting relationship, and I’m sure glad he’s still around.
He fathered nine children and enjoys 11 grandkids and five great-grand kids. He’s lonely though. Mom’s gone, his older brother recently passed, and his friends have steadily passed as well.
He’s an interesting man who impacted in profound ways the lives of a lot of people.
ThresherK
Called my Dad, we’re all hopefully getting together at my sister’s next weekend for his b’day. As one can expect, we haven’t done anything but chat on phone for a year. A hug will feel very comforting.
I am a not-young and knew I wasn’t put on earth to raise a human being. A kitten? Yes, I can almost handle one of those. So a big round of applause to those who have the knack of doing this. I’ll just pay my taxes, vote for support and education referenda, and appreciate those who can propagate the species.
brendancalling
There’s a card and a shirt coming, but I’m one of the families separated by Covid, and haven’t seen my kid in over a year because Canada can’t get its shit together.
ive remarked on this before—I moved to fucking Hippyville, Burlington VT, land of Performative progressivism so I could see my kid in Montreal every weekend. I can’t stand it here—I’m living John Prine’s “Crazy as a Loon” in real life—and it’s been one false promise after another from Canada. “Next month we relax restrictions… well, maybe next month… well, check with us in two months… lol, did we say April? We meant June… well, maybe more like July… HAHA, we meant September.”
On and on and on. You can’t blame Alberta and Ontario forever. Eventually, Justin, you have to actually govern and bring your rogue provinces to heel.
Im missing his high school graduation, which is Wednesday. I’m betting when all is said and done, it’ll be Spring 2022. Two lost fucking years. Two precious years down the fucking drain.
Two tears in a bucket, motherfuck it. But if Cole is wondering why some people are angry, hurtful, and bitter, <a href=“https://youtu.be/6YMeZSxNWV8”>I got a right</a>.
Mike in NC
Weird new ‘dramedy’ on AMC called “Kevin Can F**k Himself” fails miserably both as a comedy and a drama. The laugh track is particularly painful.
C Stars
@Ruckus: All that AND precision metal machining. He sounds like a really good dad.
C Stars
I went out for lunch with my dad today halfway between where we both live. It was a cool day with a healthy bay breeze, after a couple of scorchers. So we ate outside with a nice view, but all our utensils kept getting blown off the table. Kinda seemed like a good metaphor for something to do with our relationship. He’s kind and loving one day, cranky and enigmatic the next (it’s always been that way; this isn’t age). But overall, it was good. He’s 70 now, which is hard to believe.
Frankensteinbeck
None of those characters are Takei’s. They are all characters who took on the role of father and are fan-favorites because of it. I don’t know the top left, and feel like a fool because someone’s going to identify him and I’ll go “OH.” Top right is the Mandalorian, who has a whole show about taking care of Baby Yoda. Bottom left is Uncle Iroh, the wholesome, wise, and kindly uncle of the villain on Avatar: The Last Airbender, that spends the series slowly nurturing and straightening out his nephew who was badly fucked up by his biological father. And lower right is Piccolo, the antihero from Dragonball Z who for all he’s a shitty parent to Gohan, is 10,000% more devoted than Gohan’s actual father Goku.
dmsilev
@Wag: Lower left is from Avatar: The Last Airbender. He’s the uncle of one of the main characters, and acts as a substitute father.
Lyrebird
@Villago Delenda Est:
Things are stressful right now bc my father is not doing very well and due to Covid and small children and stuff I can not see him right now. I am trying not to let it eat me up.@brendancalling: I am sending lots of good wishes your way, that would eat me up, too!
But back to Villago’s point:
My father is human and has faults. I have all of the same ones. He is a million times better father than TFG can even imagine. I’m glad they’ll probably never meet bc that criminal does not deserve to impact any other decent people. He has done enough damage.
Hugged my kids and let them watch a little extra TV. Sent pictures of them to the Dadster. Ranted here. A good day, right?
dexwood
@C Stars:
Hell, I’m 70 now which is hard to believe. Had a beer and something to nosh on with my son, his wife, and my favorite wife at a great brew pub.
Mike in NC
@Lyrebird: I’m convinced that these idiotic messages that the Fat Orange Clown puts out are composed by his ball-washer Stephen Miller.
A Ghost to Most
Here’s to all of you who had a real father. Mine was a nasty drunk, and I breathed a sigh of relief the day he died. I basically raised myself, which explains my semi-feral nature.
Lyrebird
@Mike in NC: Totally believable. Too much thought behind them to be Orange Menace, and SM has the same poisonous views as the boss.
CarolPW
@Frankensteinbeck: Top left I think is Auron from Final Fantasy X, who served as a father figure for Tidus the main character.
Steeplejack
New Ricky and Morty starting now!
Ken
Coincidentally (?), that was the theme of our pastor’s sermon today. The text was Mark 4:36-41, where Jesus is trying to take a nap but the disciples wake him up.
NotMax
Reminder for any who might be interested that Prime Days begin at midnight Pacific time and run for 48 hours thereafter.
Guide to the goings on; if the past is any measure, will be constantly updated in real time. And another, with a more, um, florid design.
Also, info on simultaneous savings deals offered by competing outlets.
Steeplejack
@NotMax:
Thanks for the links. I can’t think of anything I need, but you never know.
NotMax
As for fathers, the less uttered from this quarter about either (factory issue or step), the infinitely better.
NotMax
@John Revolta
Yowza! Managed to move from “I’ll just rest my eyes for a few minutes” to waking up five hours later today. 11:30 to 4:30. Can’t think of anything more satisfying which might have filled the time.
At this point I’ll happily take sleep whenever it deigns to arrive.
Ben Cisco (onboard the Defiant)
Dad’s been gone for four years now. I take solace in the fact that he loved to laugh and make others laugh as well. Been easier to find my joy since Inauguration 2021, and I laugh in his honor and on his behalf.
Happy Father’s Day Baba Cisco. I carry on in the name of the ancestors.
Ohio Mom
Brendancalling:
Every time I read a comment from you about being so near yet so far from your son, my heart breaks for you.
Like a lot of people, I’ve idealized Canada. The mess they’ve made of their Covid response has me rethinking that.
NotMax
@Ohio Mom
Better having to contend with poutine than with Putin.
:)
Omnes Omnibus
I had a great weekend with my dad. He is recovering nicely; he is planning to challenge himself at his cardiac rehab appointments (my mom told the rehab people that the challenge for them with him was not to let him go too hard too fast). I cut my parents’ ;awn on Saturday – probably the first time I cut a lawn in 28 years. My brother and my nephew are also taking turns. I’ll do it again when I visit for the Fourth. I was really glad to still have a dad around with whom I could celebrate. He liked the Penzey’s spices.
Fear the Deer!
Omnes Omnibus
@Ruckus:
Hey, I hear you retired. Congrats. Now am I still allowed to tell you to fuck off or are there new rules? Life is complicated.
C Stars
@dexwood: Happy Father’s Day! I believe you had a good one.
frosty
@Omnes Omnibus: I believe “Fuck off!” or variations on the phrase are always acceptable Balloon Juice greetings, even more so when the greetee is retired and the greeter is not.
hitchhiker
My father’s been gone for 20 years, and for the 30 years before that I was the child who escaped the family drama by lighting out for the west and not looking back.
He was — insecure. Smart but not educated, capable but lazy, generally not equal to the messes he made, and always trying to get over. He was the sort of person who lets a professional take a studio portrait, then keeps the proof and puts it in a cheap frame but never buys pictures. He fathered eight of us and even liked a few of us … not me, usually. I wasn’t a pretty girl or a popular teenager, which would have impressed him, and he didn’t enjoy knowing that I could think circles around him.
I didn’t enjoy that either, tbh. I was maybe 35 by the time I realized that it was okay that I wasn’t the daughter he’d have picked; he wasn’t the dad I’d have picked either, but we managed to make the best of it.
The father of my own children is about as unlike my dad as a person can be. We all adore him.
trollhattan
Think of dad every time I do a house project, because he could do anything, better and several times faster than I. (Except plumbing–his drains never drained right.) I “helped” by watching and assumed that the knowledge would seep into my brain and be there when needed. Sigh. Miss you, dad.
Because I’m blessed my kid came home for the weekend and I harvested a solid Father’s Day hug and we walked down to the Mexican joint for burritos. Ole!
Bless all you dads.
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus:
I am already fucking off, it’s my life’s goal to be so old that I can’t remember what fucking off is like. I’m not holding my breath as that seems counter productive.
HumboldtBlue
It’s a Nike ad, but it’s still really good.
Richard Williams coaching 9-year-old Serena Williams.
Ruckus
@Omnes Omnibus:
Also, life is not complicated.
It is fucking messy and sometimes it hits you right in the crotch, a lot harder than seems necessary.
But really, the rules are simple.
One, be a nice person. Doesn’t mean bend over whenever just don’t be a dick.
Two, pay your bills. The corollary is don’t spend more than you have. Now this one can be tricky and business is often trying to fuck you big time so you have to pay attention.
Three, save for retirement, you really can’t count on anyone else being there for you, or what might happen before you get there.
Four, marry for their personality because that’s the part that ends up meaning the most to you on a day to day basis. And if you have kids that will help them the most.
Five, do honest work. At the end of the day you won’t have to apologize to anyone for your life.
Six, if the boss is a dick, find another job, there is almost always a better one out there.
Seven, whatever type of music you enjoy, make sure that you get enough every day.
Eight, be a better person, even if it is hard, or seems impossible, it will make someone’s day at some point and damned if that doesn’t feel the best.
Nine, OK here is the most important – ready?
Fuck Off Omnes…… Gotcha!
Bruce K in ATH-GR
Something popped up in my memory: an episode of M*A*S*H, “Sons and Bowlers”. Hawkeye’s father goes in for surgery in Maine, and Hawkeye frets while trying to connect with him, while Charles provides uncharacteristic moral support (“be thankful that only distance is separating you; my father and I could be twelve thousand miles apart in the same room”). The line that sticks with me:
“My father’s a good man. He always wanted what was best for me. But where I have a father … you have a dad.”
Just One More Canuck
@brendancalling: so what do you suggest Justin do that he actually has the power to do?
dnfree
@hitchhiker: my husband and I both came from larger baby-boom-era families. I didn’t know too many people from families with only two children until college. At that point I noticed that parents in those families appeared to generally care about and pay attention to both of their children. No one seemed to get temporarily written off or ignored. I know this is an overgeneralization, but it made me look at family planning differently, with a focus on quality of the relationship rather than quantity of children.
My husband and I decided to have no more than three children, that seeming to be the number above which children generally seemed to get lost in the shuffle.
Yes, I know there are big families that attend to each and every child, and small families where the parents are uncaring or incapable. This was a rule of thumb that I still find to be fairly accurate.
dnfree
@Omnes Omnibus: having done cardiac rehab, tell your dad not to try to overachieve. During my rehab, twice men (yes, men) quit exercising next to me and had nurses rush over. In both cases, they were immediately hauled into surgery. The biggest impression I got from these incidents was TAKE YOUR MEDICINE faithfully. The first questions the staff asked were “Did you take your medications this morning? How long ago?”