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You are here: Home / Economics / C.R.E.A.M. / Schadenfreudelicious Link: “”The Stink of His Family Is Nearly Impossible to Get Off”: Jared and Ivanka’s Final Chapter in Washington Demolished Their Future”

Schadenfreudelicious Link: “”The Stink of His Family Is Nearly Impossible to Get Off”: Jared and Ivanka’s Final Chapter in Washington Demolished Their Future”

by Anne Laurie|  January 9, 20214:06 pm| 147 Comments

This post is in: C.R.E.A.M., Excellent Links, Trump Crime Cartel, Lock Him Up...Lock Them All Up

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“People used to fear Trump’s wrath,” a former friend of Ivanka’s said. “Now they fear his affiliation.” https://t.co/qknf6igfb0

— Liam Stack (@liamstack) January 8, 2021

Of course, chances are that the younger Trump/Kushners will be miraculously rehabilitated no later than the 2020 midterms, but it’s nice to know they’re currently suffering the worst such can suffer…

… Ivanka and her husband, Jared Kushner, have spent the past five years performing a mincing dance around reality, spinning their own parallel universe instead. When it suited them, they were the loudest, most trusted voices in President Trump’s ear, with outsize presences and responsibilities. When it was less advantageous, they shrunk out of sight. As for their influence, well, there was only so much they could do, they’d say. Dad would ultimately be dad…

There aren’t many friends left, but as of this week, there were plenty of people who would either tolerate Javanka or at least bite their tongues: people who had known them for years, people who’d hold their noses to do business with them, people who didn’t much care for their administration but certainly didn’t mind the lower tax rates, the deregulation, the proximity to power. As such, they kept their disdain quiet, at least beyond their immediate social circles.

That changed on Wednesday…

Other longtime friends told me on Thursday that many people who hadn’t wanted to get political were looking to get their feet wet. “It feels like everyone on the Upper East Side is texting me today. Suddenly they all want to join the Resistance,” the former friend said.

It’s unlikely that Sommer and Kloss and the uptown Resistance have suddenly grown consciences in the last day. Rather, Wednesday’s depravity and the couple’s role in it officially made them radioactive. For the last four years, it was easier to say nothing. Last week I could have written a story about Kushner’s role in the Middle East peace process and Ivanka’s positioning for a political future in Florida. But by Wednesday evening, that had all changed. Having any association with them suddenly became the more difficult option. “People used to fear Trump’s wrath,” another former friend of Ivanka’s told me. “Now they fear his affiliation. The stink of his family is nearly impossible to get off. How do you associate yourself with the worst, most toxic people in U.S. history?”…

His daughter and son-in-law lost their power along with him. It didn’t help that they looked craven while everything burned, people around them noted. Ivanka had seemingly been trying to launch her political career, campaigning in Georgia and posting old photos of herself handing out vegetables in Florida, they said. “The finance world knew Jared was in the Middle East when all of this was happening, too, so their self-serving was laid bare,” one person told me. “The narrative going around is that Jared & co. plan to buy up all the distressed assets created by the pandemic he created, like a fucking oligarch.”

Optically, it didn’t help that someone caught a moving truck outside their Kalorama home in Washington on Thursday morning. A man lugging boxes from the garage loaded them into an orange truck with “College Hunks Hauling Junk” printed across the side. A spokesman could not be reached for comment.

Someone just sent me this photo of moving trucks at Jared and Ivanka's house. pic.twitter.com/fll6OiiBHX

— Hunter Walker (@hunterw) January 7, 2021

From commentor Mary G, early this morning:

Ivanka’s on Parler shilling for contributions to Trump Media and bragging they’ve already sold $100,000 coffee mugs. How the mighty have fallen. At the beginning of Twitler’s term she was pushing a $10,000 bracelet from her jewelry line, now it’s something that costs $1.59 to make that they get $15 at most for.

Elsewhere, Melania mourns that now she will never be known as ‘the GOP Jackie Kennedy’…

"Her disinterest in addressing the country was indicative of being 'checked out,' said another White House source, who added, 'she just isn't in a place mentally or emotionally anymore where she wants to get involved.'
Except with the furniture." https://t.co/IbmC6vl6L7

— Kate Bennett (@KateBennett_DC) January 8, 2021


(She was actually supervising a photo shoot for a projected coffee-table book on her White House renovations when the Trump Insurrection took place.)

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Reader Interactions

147Comments

  1. 1.

    rikyrah

    January 9, 2021 at 4:10 pm

    🤗🤗🤗

    Since the terrorists so rudely interrupted our joy, let's take it back.Democrats will control the White House, the House, and the US motherfucking Senate.Thanks, Georgia. pic.twitter.com/Zl68362Ggx— Florida Chris (@chrislongview) January 9, 2021

  2. 2.

    Wapiti

    January 9, 2021 at 4:11 pm

    Sucks to be them.

    (and 2022 midterms?)

  3. 3.

    rikyrah

    January 9, 2021 at 4:11 pm

    I still want Jarvanka in matching orange jumpsuits 😒

  4. 4.

    Bruuuuce

    January 9, 2021 at 4:13 pm

    I have no doubt that AG Tish James has them in her crosshairs, too. Banging some grains (Pratchett reference, y’all thirteen-year-old boys!) while I lean back and watch.

  5. 5.

    MattF

    January 9, 2021 at 4:13 pm

    It’s now physical revulsion towards the Trump family. You can’t fix that with a photo op.

  6. 6.

    dr. bloor

    January 9, 2021 at 4:19 pm

    @MattF:  Sadly, I suspect you’ll be amazed at what a little time and a lot of money will do.

  7. 7.

    Betty Cracker

    January 9, 2021 at 4:19 pm

    Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but I think Donald Trump inciting a deadly riot at the U.S. Capitol will make the Trumps radioactive in a long-term sense. There will always be a disturbingly large number of drooling loons who idolize them, but those aren’t the sort of people the Trumps aspire to associate with. I suspect more stories that put them in a horrible light will come out over the weeks and months ahead, so the present madness won’t go down the memory hole any time soon.

  8. 8.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:20 pm

    (insert tongue firmly in cheek)

    They richly deserve all that is coming to them.

    (return tongue to default position)

  9. 9.

    rikyrah

    January 9, 2021 at 4:23 pm

    Now we know why he left

    More: A senior Justice Department official, at the behest of the White House, called Trump-appointed U.S. Attorney Byung J. Pak and told him he needed to step down because he wasn’t pursuing vote-fraud allegations to Trump’s satisfaction. w/ @aviswanatha https://t.co/Rc5qdMzBXI— Sadie Gurman (@sgurman) January 9, 2021

  10. 10.

    Emma from FL

    January 9, 2021 at 4:23 pm

    @dr. bloor: They don’t have that much money, they’re in debt up to the eyebrows, and there’s a $400 million bill due next year.

  11. 11.

    Baud

    January 9, 2021 at 4:25 pm

    @Betty Cracker:

    Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but I think Donald Trump inciting a deadly riot at the U.S. Capitol will make the Trumps radioactive in a long-term sense.

    Until they appear on Dancing with the Stars.

  12. 12.

    Kent

    January 9, 2021 at 4:25 pm

    @Bruuuuce: I have no doubt that AG Tish James has them in her crosshairs, too. Banging some grains (Pratchett reference, y’all thirteen-year-old boys!) while I lean back and watch.

    Just like Al Capone and Enron and a bunch of other white collar crooks, taxes is what will finally bring them down. It is the ultimate black and white. You either paid them or you didn’t.

  13. 13.

    debbie

    January 9, 2021 at 4:25 pm

    I won’t be satisfied until they are refused admittance to parties on Martha’s Vineyard.

  14. 14.

    JaySinWA

    January 9, 2021 at 4:26 pm

    Somebody in a prior post suggested this as a way to harvest the law breakers.

    Dangle pardons for contact info.

    https://twitter.com/PeterCorless/status/1347965109075730434

    So who dun it?

  15. 15.

    Geminid

    January 9, 2021 at 4:26 pm

    @Bruuuuce: Can the New York AG bring criminal charges? I know she has wide ranging civil jurisdiction.

  16. 16.

    rikyrah

    January 9, 2021 at 4:26 pm

    As I look up the voting history of the individuals identified and arrested for the Capitol attack, I'm struck by the fact that none of them are regular voters, most didn't vote before '20. The Republicans made a deal with the devil and America is paying for it.— Tom Bonier (@tbonier) January 9, 2021

  17. 17.

    Kent

    January 9, 2021 at 4:27 pm

    @Geminid:@Bruuuuce: Can the New York AG bring criminal charges? I know she has wide ranging civil jurisdiction.

    Of course.  For state crimes.  Like state tax evasion.

  18. 18.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:28 pm

    Do they make a bottle the size of, say, the Washington Monument?

  19. 19.

    Cameron

    January 9, 2021 at 4:30 pm

    @Baud: I dunno if they’ll let Trump use a golf cart.

  20. 20.

    dr. bloor

    January 9, 2021 at 4:31 pm

    @Emma from FL: Dad is likely broke.  Kushner is a career criminal from a family of criminals.  He’s probably forgotten all the places he has money stashed.  I’d bet the same goes for Ivanka, and none of the stuff she’s put in place in other countries over the past four years will automatically evaporate on the 21st.

  21. 21.

    Dorothy A. Winsor

    January 9, 2021 at 4:31 pm

    I think the Trumpists will want to rally around him, but frankly, I think he’s physically and mentally deteriorating. He’s not going to show up well. If he tries to start a new social media platform, I expect it to do as well as Sarah Palin’s TV channel did.

    I’ve been ranting about the coup attempt on twitter and I noticed today that I’ve lost a few followers. I assume those things are related. It can’t be helped. This week’s actions can’t be overlooked.

  22. 22.

    Scout211

    January 9, 2021 at 4:31 pm

    https://www.cnn.com/2021/01/09/politics/donald-trump-dangerous-capitol-riot/index.html

    This is a sort of “think piece” on CNN that was interesting to read. Although it ignores the fact that at least 50% of Americans realized how dangerous Trump was from day one.

    The day America realized how dangerous Donald Trump is

     

    When the history of the 45th presidency is written, Wednesday, January 6, will go down as the day America realized how dangerous President Donald Trump really is.

    In the span of hours, the country finally witnessed the price of its five-year experiment turning its election process into a reality show that produced an unhinged megalomanic as commander-in-chief who amassed so much power through his lies and fear-mongering that he was able to engineer an insurrection as a final act that left democracy dangling by a thread.
    Wednesday’s siege at the Capitol marked the culmination of Trump’s years-long quest to cultivate a fiercely loyal base that would do anything for him by playing on their fears and resentments as he lured them into believing his incessant lies about the sinister motives of government, election fraud and his own conduct.

  23. 23.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:33 pm

    @JaySinWA

    (shyly raises hand)

    Guilty as charged.

    :)

  24. 24.

    Bruuuuce

    January 9, 2021 at 4:33 pm

    @Kent: I’m fairly certain that while taxes are a part of what’s going on (especially the revauation scheme), there’s more to it for both Donnie and Trump:TNG. They perpetrated all sorts of financial frauds, and it’s going to be a pleasure to see all of it laid bare for the world to see.

  25. 25.

    rikyrah

    January 9, 2021 at 4:33 pm

    Receipts brought 👏👏

    Thread. @hughhewitt has this to say about those of us who believe the president should be impeached."Whatever the impeachment chorus is, it isn’t principled, it isn’t concerned with justice and it isn’t concerned with the future."Some thoughts 1/https://t.co/sUKhUCrPBK— Stephen Hayes (@stephenfhayes) January 9, 2021

  26. 26.

    Benw

    January 9, 2021 at 4:35 pm

    @dr. bloor: at my most cynical I think ABC will wait a discreet 6 months before offering Trump and his asshole kids $5M each to star in…. THE PRESIDENT’S APPRENTICE.

    Each week contestants compete to be Trump’s “chief of staff of the week”, but watch out! If the Trump kids vote you “the whistleblower”, you’re headed home!

    Jeez I just gave myself the creeps writing that

  27. 27.

    Leto

    January 9, 2021 at 4:35 pm

    @rikyrah: America made a deal with the devil in 1788 and 1877. We’ve been renewing that agreement every 2-4 years.

  28. 28.

    Chetan Murthy

    January 9, 2021 at 4:36 pm

    In a previous thread, a commenter wrote: “I had to turn Maddow off on Thursday because I just couldn’t stand the snap judgment that no one was doing anything.”

    I’d be happy to be corrected by Adam, lordy I would, but: thousands of enemies of Democracy invaded our Capitol and tried to murder our elected representatives, pervert the course of our democracy.  Will all of those thousands be identified?  It seems to me the ones that are least likely to be identified, are those that are most dangerous: the ones who were careful to be nondescript, didn’t circulate their images on social media, and were there for a mission.

    I sure hope that law enforcement is going to do everything necessary to find the plotters and leaders, as well as the participants.  And to that comment: Hawley still sits in his office; so does Cruz, and so do 100+ GrOPers in both houses, who voted to destroy our democracy.

    Rolling up the yahoos and other “chaff” distracts from the fact that the actual leaders are getting away.

  29. 29.

    debbie

    January 9, 2021 at 4:37 pm

    Trump set aside his lifelong aspiration to be a member of upperclass society when the thrill of absolute power presented itself. Now, disillusioned by the rabble’s lousy sense of fashion and his power quickly draining away, I think Trump imagines a return to the society pages that no longer exist and the socialites who will now openly mock him to his face. All he has left are sycophants.

    Once he’s safely away from the nuclear codes and government secrets, I will enjoy watching Trump’s decline into abject dissolution.

  30. 30.

    Bruuuuce

    January 9, 2021 at 4:37 pm

    @Geminid: I’m pretty certain that her investigations are on the civil side, and that the criminal side has been left in the purview of the Manhattan DA’s office. As I’ve mentioned before, the current DA, Cy Vance, Jr., has a record of going soft on high rollers, but his office is up for election this year IIRC, and all of the leading candidates have made it clear that they want unimpeded shots at the Trumps. It’s going to be a very rocky road for the family, and I would be pleased if they were stripped of every penny, with the booty being distributed among BLM, Planned Parenthood, the SPLC, and CAIR.

  31. 31.

    Comrade Colette

    January 9, 2021 at 4:37 pm

    @Dorothy A. Winsor:

    I think he’s physically and mentally deteriorating

    I think he’s sitting on the floor of the Oval Office, building a wall with Duplo blocks and Tonka trucks and making vroom-vroom noises while Melania plays house at the other end of the building.

  32. 32.

    LuciaMia

    January 9, 2021 at 4:37 pm

    Since when did Melania EVER act like a GOP Jackie Kennedy?

  33. 33.

    Vhh

    January 9, 2021 at 4:40 pm

    It’s like France after the Allied landing in Normandy in 1944. Overnight, most French became part of the,Resistance

  34. 34.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:40 pm

    @Benw

    ABC

    Not a Rubicon the Mouse is apt to cross.

    IMHO.

  35. 35.

    JaySinWA

    January 9, 2021 at 4:40 pm

    @Chetan Murthy: Rolling up the small fry is generally how an investigation starts.

  36. 36.

    Leto

    January 9, 2021 at 4:40 pm

    @rikyrah: Hugh Hewitt is Miracle Whip come to life.

  37. 37.

    p.a

    January 9, 2021 at 4:40 pm

    There will be those who will be willing to associate w them, but they will be the kind of botoxed, bronzed, embalmed, older Mar-a-Lago sycophants who hang around dad, not the kind of NY café society types they want to consider their peeps.  Assuming they don’t have to decamp in a no-extradition locale.

  38. 38.

    Emma from FL

    January 9, 2021 at 4:42 pm

    @dr. bloor: Kushner is an financial idiot. He ran his dad’s newspaper to the ground and overpaid for a New York building with the unfortunate address of 666 Fifth Avenue to the tune of 1.6 billion. Little Ivanka lives off her phony “clothes” lines and Daddy’s money. There’s no there there.

    (also) they have been fudging their New York taxes for a while. Good times.

  39. 39.

    debbie

    January 9, 2021 at 4:42 pm

    @Benw:

    I don’t think so. They’re toxic and the outrage from the public will not be worth the price ABC would have to pay.

  40. 40.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:42 pm

    @Leto

    Tapioca.

    ;)

  41. 41.

    Kirk Spencer

    January 9, 2021 at 4:43 pm

    @Chetan Murthy: So an anecdote.

    I belong to a list of fellow veterans. When the insurrection attempt kicked off there was a wave of anger from various people on the list who’d been supportive of Trump as little as a week earlier.

    “I haven’t been as angry since Saigon,” said one, and others concurred.

    I do think it was an eye-opening experience for a number of people who were trying hard to believe they weren’t with the bad guys; that they hadn’t been wrong.

    And human nature being what it is, I expect those individuals to be the reason the guilty fall hard. Because for a lot of people being able to blame others for your failure is a powerful drug.

    I just hope it doesn’t get too ugly.

  42. 42.

    John Revolta

    January 9, 2021 at 4:43 pm

    “A former friend of Ivanka’s”

    “Yeah, be sure to put that in there!”

    “Okay but you’re anonymous anyway”

    “Nevertheless”

  43. 43.

    debbie

    January 9, 2021 at 4:43 pm

    @Leto:

    Ick.

  44. 44.

    HalfAssedHomesteader

    January 9, 2021 at 4:44 pm

    I hope College Hunk Hauling turns out to be an FBI front and they just turned over a mountain of evidence.

  45. 45.

    Comrade Colette

    January 9, 2021 at 4:45 pm

    @Vhh: Yup. I’ve heard various formulations of the idea that the main myth of the Resistance is that there even was one. The further in time we get away from events, the more heroism and widespread resistance there was in misty hindsight. This time, though, there’s a much more extensive record – photographic, online media, and social media – to connect the people who were willing to socialize and do business with the Trumps back to them, no matter how fast they run now.

  46. 46.

    Mary G

    January 9, 2021 at 4:46 pm

    I made that comment! It’s on the front page, thanks AL.

    Since Ivanka is her Daddy’s girl, I enjoy imagining that she’s sent the dog, the kids, and their nannies off to a play date so she can scream obscenities at Jarad over the secured phone and break things around the house.

  47. 47.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:46 pm

    @p.a.

    Can guarantee they will NEVER be spotted in a Publix.

    “Whaddaya mean there isn’t an Elitex?”

    ;)

  48. 48.

    Benw

    January 9, 2021 at 4:47 pm

    @NotMax: @debbie: hopefully!

  49. 49.

    dr. bloor

    January 9, 2021 at 4:49 pm

    @Emma from FL: Well, obviously, I have no idea what their balance sheets look like, although if you conflate business failure with private cash stash, you’re ignoring an important variable.  But there’s no scenario where Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump end up in a double wide outside Tampa after having served jail time.  It ain’t gonna happen.  It’s a big, corrupt world.

  50. 50.

    Alison Rose

    January 9, 2021 at 4:51 pm

    I wonder if Ivanka will suddenly decide to take her hubby’s name. I mean…”Ivanka Kushner” is still gonna stand out, but not as immediately for many people as her papa’s shittified name.

  51. 51.

    Ian R

    January 9, 2021 at 4:52 pm

    @LuciaMia:  I think she meant that she was hoping for his assassination.

  52. 52.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 4:52 pm

    @dr. bloor

    Luxury condo on Devil’s Island?

    “All rooms come with ocean view.”

    //

  53. 53.

    WaterGirl

    January 9, 2021 at 4:53 pm

    @Geminid: I believe she has said in the past that if she finds criminal issues she notifies the appropriate office that can then pursue them.

  54. 54.

    Leto

    January 9, 2021 at 4:53 pm

    @HalfAssedHomesteader:  “Haha, my shirt says: FBI! Means “Federal Body Inspector”! Funny, right? Ok, what do I need to take away?” – pitch to the producers of a tv show coming in 2022 which at first would’ve been laughed out of the room but is now seen as entirely plausible because it actually happened…

  55. 55.

    Wapiti

    January 9, 2021 at 4:55 pm

    @Kirk Spencer:  I think images like someone taking down a US flag and putting up a Trump flag strike that cohort viscerally.

    And anyone with military time understands a leader who commits people to a really bad idea and then walks away from the damage is not someone you want as your leader. They can look at those willing dupe veterans and sympathize a little, but re-center their own oath at the same time. All enemies, foreign and domestic.

  56. 56.

    Emma from FL

    January 9, 2021 at 4:56 pm

    @dr. bloor: I didn’t mean to imply that they would. But what the Trumps want, what they have always wanted, is to be included among the New York upper crust. Not the flashy high society, the really old money that hands out multi-million dollar art collections and botanical gardens like so much Halloween candy. And their best chance was being “daughter and son-in-law of powerful former president”. Even the high flash won’t give them the time of day. And they’ll always be one step from a lawsuit or a criminal prosecution.

  57. 57.

    Mallard Filmore

    January 9, 2021 at 4:59 pm

    @Chetan Murthy:

     

    Rolling up the yahoos and other “chaff” distracts from the fact that the actual leaders are getting away.

    If the situation still looks like it does today, after Biden had been in office for a month, I will share your concern.

  58. 58.

    Mike in NC

    January 9, 2021 at 5:01 pm

    So looking forward to Monday — even thought I have a dentist visit — like a kid waiting for Santa Claus to arrive on Christmas Day.

  59. 59.

    Elizabelle

    January 9, 2021 at 5:01 pm

    You guys might have posted this already: CNN:

    Derrick Evans, the West Virginia state lawmaker who was allegedly among the rioters who stormed the US Capitol on Wednesday, resigned Saturday.

    Evans has been charged with one count of knowingly entering or remaining in any restricted building or grounds without lawful authority; and one count of violent entry and disorderly conduct on Capitol Grounds. … Evans, a supporter of Trump, recorded a Facebook Live video in which he can be heard shouting, “We’re in! We’re in, baby!” while moving among a crowd of rioters as he walked through a doorway of the Capitol.

    …. The chair of the West Virginia GOP on Saturday said Evans “made the right decision” to resign.
    “The actions of Derrick Evan were unwise and unbecoming of an elected official,” Chairwoman Melody Potter said in a statement.

    Melody’s probably hoping no more shoes drop. Stay tuned.

  60. 60.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 5:02 pm

    @Emma from FL: And since someone mentioned Ivanka’s jewelry line, I’m also wondering how long it will be before China finds a problem with the paperwork for those special trademark deals.

  61. 61.

    boatboy_srq

    January 9, 2021 at 5:05 pm

    Melania isn’t even on track for remembrance as the GOP Edith Wilson or Sarah Childress Polk.

  62. 62.

    David 🎅🎄Merry Christmas🎄🎅 Koch

    January 9, 2021 at 5:06 pm

    It’s so bad Ivanka is going to reverse all her extensive plastic surgery, so no one can recognizer her.

  63. 63.

    boatboy_srq

    January 9, 2021 at 5:06 pm

    Who knew the real-world equivalent of the kid who cried out “but he hasn’t any clothes” would be hundreds of tRumpets trashing the Capitol and trampling each other to go scavenging for souvenirs?

  64. 64.

    Chetan Murthy

    January 9, 2021 at 5:07 pm

    @Mallard Filmore:

    If the situation still looks like it does today, after Biden had been in office for a month, I will share your concern.

    Very fair.  And if we learn that all the celltower logs, the video recordings from critical locations in the Capitol, were deleted, yeah, again, I’ll be very suspicious.

    I get that we can’t expect anything out of this regime: it ain’t called an autogolpe for nuthin’.  Which is why I’m of a like mind with Rachel: we all need to demand full, thorough, deep-reaching investigations that find all the perps.  All of them.  B/c we can’t expect that to happen all by itself.  Which, in itself, is an indictment of government that I hate/hate/hate.  But it is what it is.

  65. 65.

    JMG

    January 9, 2021 at 5:09 pm

    Jared and Ivanka have purchased property on one of those islands for the superrich in Biscayne Bay. They’ll fit right in MIAMI society!

  66. 66.

    topclimber

    January 9, 2021 at 5:10 pm

    @Leto: Well, in all fairness to the Founding Fathers, if the South had treated slaves as 3/5ths of a person for ALL purposes, and not just for apportionment, it would have been a huge improvement over the 0/5ths treatment that prevailed for another 70 years.

    How great would it have been if black couples had a 3/5th right to legal marriage, the option to keep 3/5ths of their families from being sold down the river, been allowed to avoid being killed or raped at massa’s will 3/5ths of the time, etc.?

  67. 67.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 5:15 pm

    @David Merry Christmas Koch

    “I’m Jewish now. Want to come out of here looking like Golda Meir. By the way, I’ll be paying in cash.”

    //

  68. 68.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 5:16 pm

    @Comrade Colette: I think he’s sitting on the floor of the Oval Office, building a wall with Duplo blocks and Tonka trucks and making vroom-vroom noises

    Setting up the incapacity defense, eh?

  69. 69.

    Gary K

    January 9, 2021 at 5:17 pm

    will be miraculously rehabilitated no later than the 2020 midterms

    Aw jeez I hope we’re not in some Groundhog loop.

  70. 70.

    Bruuuuce

    January 9, 2021 at 5:17 pm

    @Ken: No, just a day ending in “y”

  71. 71.

    HumboldtBlue

    January 9, 2021 at 5:21 pm

    @Betty Cracker:

    There will always be a disturbingly large number of drooling loons who idolize them, but those aren’t the sort of people the Trumps aspire to associate with.

    That’s my sense as well, Betty, and I am encouraged at the backlash Cruz and Hawley are currently getting, particularly from their own side.

    They want the respectable wealthy to allow them into the rarefied air of upper crust society, instead they get Cletus and wannabe Confederates.

    And don’t forget, folks, that after Trump gave his incitement speech he and his shitty clan retreated to a tent to watch it unfold.

  72. 72.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 5:21 pm

    @HalfAssedHomesteader: @Leto: “College Hunks Hauling Junk” sounds like it could be softcore porn (possibly gay-themed), so “Federal Body Inspector” works.

  73. 73.

    SFAW

    January 9, 2021 at 5:22 pm

    @Leto: @NotMax:

    I thought he had been deemed an “ambulatory cream cheese sculpture,” and my recollection is it was Betty Cracker who coined that phrase (or at least she was the first person I saw using it).

  74. 74.

    MattF

    January 9, 2021 at 5:22 pm

    @Ken: Playing with the Capitol Invasion Lego set. I’m told the set includes a dozen Lego turds to decorate the Capitol floors and walls.

  75. 75.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 5:23 pm

    @HumboldtBlue: instead they get Cletus

    Can we drop this insulting name, now that Trump has suggested “low-class”?  Surely they can’t object to being called that, when Trump himself uses it?

  76. 76.

    zhena gogolia

    January 9, 2021 at 5:24 pm

    A friend just shared this insightful tweet:

    Someone made the point that the insurrection had a festive air to it – like "hey this is fun!" This is spot on. And it's the *exact* same type of energy their grandparents brought to the lynching.— Charles W McKinney, Jr. (@CharlesWMcKinn2) January 8, 2021

  77. 77.

    SFAW

    January 9, 2021 at 5:24 pm

    @boatboy_srq:

    Melania isn’t even on track for remembrance as the GOP Edith Wilson or Sarah Childress Polk.

    What about as Mrs. James Buchanan?

  78. 78.

    JanieM

    January 9, 2021 at 5:26 pm

    Ivanka looks more like an animatronic figure  than a human being. And presumably has spent a fortune making herself look that way. It’s like she doesn’t actually have any familiarity with what real human beings are like. Jared is about as bad, with his frozen plastic face.

    Or something.

  79. 79.

    Leto

    January 9, 2021 at 5:27 pm

    @Ken: I’ve seen that moving service advertised around here on those little poster boards beside the road. Doesn’t mean it still couldn’t be a soft/hardcore porn title :P

    @SFAW: I remember that, now that you mention it; I think both are fitting!

  80. 80.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 5:29 pm

    @JMG: Jared and Ivanka [will] fit right in MIAMI society!

    The part consisting of drug smugglers and sex traffickers, you mean?

  81. 81.

    prostratedragon

    January 9, 2021 at 5:30 pm

    The day America realized how dangerous Donald Trump is
    was the day he debuted that TV show.

  82. 82.

    Bruuuuce

    January 9, 2021 at 5:31 pm

    Speaking of animatronic figures,. is Disney going to remove the Orange Waste from the Hall of Presidents? Gods know, it would be the right thing to do.

    Also the right thing to do would be to pass Rep Joaquin Castro’s bill to prevent any federal property from being named after this anti-American disaster. Right after voting rights, civil rights, gay rights, healthcare, reversing the tax cuts for corps and the wealthy, etc.

  83. 83.

    Ruckus

    January 9, 2021 at 5:32 pm

    @LuciaMia:

    In their own minds they are the cream of humanity.

    The cream has soured, rotted, molded, and stinks.

    Of course it wasn’t ever good cream, it was the stuff at the very bottom of the bucket, the slop that isn’t useful for anything, that which gets poured down the drain, and pollutes everything it touches.

  84. 84.

    Parfigliano

    January 9, 2021 at 5:35 pm

    @Leto: Hugh Hewitt is still making excuses for Nixon.

  85. 85.

    boatboy_srq

    January 9, 2021 at 5:38 pm

    @SFAW: That would have been William Rufus King. Still a less ignoble figure IYAM.

  86. 86.

    Ruckus

    January 9, 2021 at 5:38 pm

    @JanieM:

    Anyone as rotted inside as the entire family is has to have intensive work done to hid the fact that they stink, in every possible way that word can be used. Even shitforbrains has work done, it’s just that he’s so cheap and skank that even the best mortician can’t make him look good, and he’s to cheap and broke to hire a good mortician to even try.

  87. 87.

    Feathers

    January 9, 2021 at 5:39 pm

    @HalfAssedHomesteader: That would be a real laugh. The gasp I had was “holy fuck, they are cheating out on their movers?” I mean, actual rich people would have white glove movers with the minimum legally required company name on the truck door. This is you have unpaid intern handling this shit, not a competent and qualified household manager. This is the sort of thing that lets other rich people know that you aren’t really rich. Personal assistants everywhere are probably laughing their asses off

    ETA: They only have a three star rating on Yelp. I would have been raked on the coals for hiring them in one of my assistant jobs.

  88. 88.

    Baud

    January 9, 2021 at 5:40 pm

    @zhena gogolia:

    This is accurate. (Trigger warning, photos of lynchings)

  89. 89.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 5:40 pm

    I understand the College Hunks took one look at the portraits in the attic and promptly projectile vomited.

    //

  90. 90.

    UncleEbeneezer

    January 9, 2021 at 5:40 pm

    College Hunks Hauling Junk?  Hopefully P*rnhub will delete the inevitable parody video that is, ahem, surely to come…

  91. 91.

    NotMax

    January 9, 2021 at 5:42 pm

    @Feathers

    Four Seasons Moving and Haulage was booked solid.

    Or so they said.

    :)

  92. 92.

    HumboldtBlue

    January 9, 2021 at 5:43 pm

    @zhena gogolia:

    And it’s the *exact* same type of energy their grandparents brought to the lynching

    I texted a very similar reaction to the family thread this morning. It has all the hallmarks of white people smiling beneath the mutilated corpse of a tortured black man.

  93. 93.

    HumboldtBlue

    January 9, 2021 at 5:46 pm

    @NotMax:

    I’m Jewish now. Want to come out of here looking like Golda Meir

    Watched an excellent three-part series on the Yom Kippur war. Golda smoked a lot was one thing I learned.

  94. 94.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 5:48 pm

    @Ruckus: the cream of humanity.

    “Or at least something found floating on top.” – Terry Pratchett

  95. 95.

    Suzanne

    January 9, 2021 at 5:51 pm

    @Betty Cracker: Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but I think Donald Trump inciting a deadly riot at the U.S. Capitol will make the Trumps radioactive in a long-term sense.

     
    Absolutely. The Trumps now are only loved by stupid crackers. Those aren’t the circles they want to travel in.

  96. 96.

    prostratedragon

    January 9, 2021 at 5:54 pm

    @Feathers:  Had that same thought, with a chuckle, when I saw the truck. And they seem to have thought they had people fooled.

  97. 97.

    lowtechcyclist

    January 9, 2021 at 5:58 pm

    @JanieM: Barbie and Ken dolls brought to life.

  98. 98.

    🐾BillinGlendaleCA

    January 9, 2021 at 5:59 pm

    @Leto: WRONG, ambulatory cream cheese* is the correct answer.

    *h/t to Betty Cracker.

  99. 99.

    Captain C

    January 9, 2021 at 6:00 pm

    @NotMax: They didn’t want to get stiffed on the bill.

  100. 100.

    prostratedragon

    January 9, 2021 at 6:01 pm

    @zhena gogolia: Absolutely. More on this point from some Black officers of the Capitol Police.

  101. 101.

    Central Planning

    January 9, 2021 at 6:01 pm

    @Ken: I don’t know who said it, but I’ve heard “The cream rises to the top. So does the scum.”

  102. 102.

    zhena gogolia

    January 9, 2021 at 6:05 pm

    @prostratedragon:

    Wow. That is very difficult to read.

  103. 103.

    What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?

    January 9, 2021 at 6:07 pm

    I still can’t get over this dynamic…Trump unleashes a murderous mob that expressed a desire to execute Mike Pence, and they came pretty close to having the opportunity to make that happen. And, it’s pretty frickin obvious it wouldn’t have stopped there. Moscow Mitch, Susan Collins, Lindsey Graham…all their neck were on the line, literally. Just about the entire GOP coalition probably was under threat. And yet.. they’re still won’t impeach the bastard. Like, they’d rather die than lose their next election or something. It’s certifiable. And for what? They have no agenda whatsoever save more tax cuts for the rich.

  104. 104.

    JanieM

    January 9, 2021 at 6:13 pm

    @What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?:

    George Will, of all people, last June:

    In life’s unforgiving arithmetic, we are the sum of our choices. Congressional Republicans have made theirs for more than 1,200 days. We cannot know all the measures necessary to restore the nation’s domestic health and international standing, but we know the first step: Senate Republicans must be routed, as condign punishment for their Vichyite collaboration, leaving the Republican remnant to wonder: Was it sensible to sacrifice dignity, such as it ever was, and to shed principles, if convictions so easily jettisoned could be dignified as principles, for . . . what? Praying people should pray, and all others should hope: May I never crave anything as much as these people crave membership in the world’s most risible deliberative body.

  105. 105.

    Almost Retired

    January 9, 2021 at 6:17 pm

    @SFAW:  Ah, but there was no “Mrs. James Buchanan” to tend to his needs while he ignored the oncoming Civil War.  The closest thing was his “roommate” William Rufus King, who was referred to as “Miss Nancy” by none other than Andrew Jackson.  This is the kind of stuff I took away from Sophomore history class.

  106. 106.

    Leto

    January 9, 2021 at 6:19 pm

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA: we keep saying the same thing: Miracle Whip/ambulatory cream cheese/milk left out in the Iraqi sun for a month and then brought back inside to pontificate. See? It’s all the same thing!

  107. 107.

    Brachiator

    January 9, 2021 at 6:20 pm

    Other longtime friends told me on Thursday that many people who hadn’t wanted to get political were looking to get their feet wet. “It feels like everyone on the Upper East Side is texting me today. Suddenly they all want to join the Resistance,” the former friend said.

    Opportunistic hypocrites. They would eagerly suck up to Trump had the coup succeed.

  108. 108.

    Geminid

    January 9, 2021 at 6:23 pm

    @Elizabelle: You asked the other day about the interviews of Abigail Spanberger and Don McEachin on WRIC TV8. I found them by looking up “spanberger news.” The story was at the bottom of page 2 this morning. The interviews were done Wednesday night.

  109. 109.

    Suzanne

    January 9, 2021 at 6:25 pm

    @Alison Rose: From what I understand, she already goes by Ivanka Kushner is certain settings.

    I’m sure Tiffany has already called an attorney and filed the name change papers.

  110. 110.

    Sm*t Cl*de

    January 9, 2021 at 6:27 pm

    @JanieM:

    George Will, of all people, last June:

    George Will was calling for conservatives to campaign against Trump back in 2016. Called for a 50-state Republican loss as “condign punishment” for whoring themselves out to Trumpism.

    Will writes “condign punishment” so often, I swear he has a macro installed in his word processor so he only needs a single keystroke.

  111. 111.

    Steve in the ATL

    January 9, 2021 at 6:28 pm

    @SFAW: Charles Pierce, IIRC

  112. 112.

    mrmoshpotato

    January 9, 2021 at 6:31 pm

    The stink of his family is nearly impossible to get off.

    LOL!  SAD!

    We could’ve told you this five years ago, and New Yorkers with a longer history with this trash in their city probably could’ve told you this fifty years ago!

    Cry harder trash that associates with trash!

  113. 113.

    SFAW

    January 9, 2021 at 6:41 pm

    @boatboy_srq:

    I knew Buchanan was a bachelor, did not know he was, as they say, a “confirmed bachelor.” Never heard of King until now, thanks for the history lesson.

  114. 114.

    Kent

    January 9, 2021 at 6:41 pm

    @Bruuuuce:@Kent: I’m fairly certain that while taxes are a part of what’s going on (especially the revauation scheme), there’s more to it for both Donnie and Trump:TNG. They perpetrated all sorts of financial frauds, and it’s going to be a pleasure to see all of it laid bare for the world to see.

    Well, sure.  But one of the main reasons to do fraud in the first place it to cheat on your taxes.

    But yes, they are an equal opportunity fraud organization.  They happily defraud their customers and partners as well as the government.

  115. 115.

    SFAW

    January 9, 2021 at 6:41 pm

    @Steve in the ATL:

    Thanks.

  116. 116.

    zhena gogolia

    January 9, 2021 at 6:43 pm

    @What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us?:

    I cannot get over this. It’s staggering.

  117. 117.

    mrmoshpotato

    January 9, 2021 at 6:49 pm

    Elsewhere, Melania mourns that now she will never be known as ‘the GOP Jackie Kennedy’…

    I can’t even laugh at this comment from the gold-digging birther bitch.  The lack of self-awareness here isn’t funny.  It’s just sad*.

    *For the record, I still think she can go fuck herself.

  118. 118.

    JanieM

    January 9, 2021 at 6:52 pm

    @Sm*t Cl*de:

    Will writes “condign punishment” so often, I swear he has a macro installed in his word processor so he only needs a single keystroke.

    LOL. Probably a bunch of other phrases too. But I did like that line about how praying people should pray, and others should hope….

  119. 119.

    burnspbesq

    January 9, 2021 at 6:53 pm

    @Chetan Murthy:

    Assumes facts not in evidence. And I’m sure you know that’s what you’re doing. The question is why.

  120. 120.

    WaterGirl

    January 9, 2021 at 6:55 pm

    @prostratedragon: Holy fuck.  They looked and acted like an angry lynch mob.  That black officer – pretty sure he was scared for his life, unlike the fucking white copes who shoot black men in the back as they are walking AWAY from the cops.

    We need a reckoning.

  121. 121.

    WaterGirl

    January 9, 2021 at 6:56 pm

    @zhena gogolia: That video was terrifying, and it’s just a video, I’m not in the middle of it.

    Fighting them off for 2 hours with no help. I am enraged.

  122. 122.

    Suzanne

    January 9, 2021 at 6:57 pm

    @SFAW: I think he and King called one another “Miss Nancy” and “Aunt Fancy” or some such. Buchanan’s niece, Harriet Lane IIRC, did all the FLOTUS stuff.

  123. 123.

    WaterGirl

    January 9, 2021 at 6:58 pm

    @SFAW: Is confirmed bachelor double-secret code for gay?

  124. 124.

    🐾BillinGlendaleCA

    January 9, 2021 at 6:59 pm

    @Leto: We have norms here at Balloon Juice that must be upheld, when you get rid of norms, then next thing you know they’re storming Cole’s place in WestbyGodVirginia!

  125. 125.

    The Thin Black Duke

    January 9, 2021 at 7:01 pm

    @WaterGirl: The Civil War never ended.

  126. 126.

    Suzanne

    January 9, 2021 at 7:04 pm

    @WaterGirl: LOL, yeah, “confirmed bachelor” was the way it was polite to refer to gay men before Stonewall and gay liberation movements. It’s not secret code.

  127. 127.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    January 9, 2021 at 7:05 pm

    @WaterGirl: It was once upon a time, when nobody admitted to the existence of gay people. Your older relative who was in his 50s and had never been married nor, so far as anyone knew, been on a date.

  128. 128.

    Anne Laurie

    January 9, 2021 at 7:06 pm

    @Mary G: Attribution added, since you’ve outed yourself!

  129. 129.

    mrmoshpotato

    January 9, 2021 at 7:09 pm

    @JaySinWA: There actually is an Office of the Pardon Attorney!  WTF?  Who named this office?  Who needed to lay off the gangster movies?

  130. 130.

    WaterGirl

    January 9, 2021 at 7:10 pm

    @The Thin Black Duke: Trayvon Martin was my first clue.  My god, that was 9 years ago.

  131. 131.

    Anne Laurie

    January 9, 2021 at 7:14 pm

    @LuciaMia: Since when did Melania EVER act like a GOP Jackie Kennedy?

    What a lot of (vapid) people remember about Jackie is that ‘She classy-ed up the White House, filled it with French antiques & stuff, and got to do a big prime-time TV special about it.’

    It’s certainly what Melania aspired to, insofar as she could bring herself to associate with the WH at all — ‘classy’ state dinners, ‘classy’ xmas decorations, a new updated ‘classy’ Rose Garden.  She really *was* planning a coffee-table book about how she’d redecorated (after Those Obama People, ugh)… but if she actually had a contract, I suspect it’ll be quietly torn up before January 20th.

  132. 132.

    burnspbesq

    January 9, 2021 at 7:29 pm

    Keep in mind that the most relevant part of Merrick Garland’s resume is running the Oklahoma City investigation and prosecution. Shit is going to get all too real for the insurrectionists.

  133. 133.

    Suzanne

    January 9, 2021 at 7:29 pm

    @Anne Laurie: To be fair, each FLOTUS is supposed to acquire some art and antiques for the White House collection, partly to have some sort of aesthetic associated with each administration. Also partly because, especially at the federal level, it’s thought that showcasing and preserving high-quality art of the current moment is an important task on behalf of the American people. In most public architecture and cultural projects, there tends to be an emphasis on lowercase-m modern aesthetics. It carries on to the design of the Library. So it isn’t necessarily laughable that a FLOTUS would want to have a book that showcases that effort. Melania specifically is fulla BS because, to the best of my knowledge, she didn’t do much to put any sort of stamp on the place, other than make the Rose Garden kind of gross.

    Trump himself signed some douchey statement saying that he wanted federal architecture to be in neoclassical style, and everyone in that cohort just rolled their eyes.

  134. 134.

    Anne Laurie

    January 9, 2021 at 7:35 pm

    @Ceci n est pas mon nym: It was once upon a time, when nobody admitted to the existence of gay people.

    People forget, but… Until AIDS became widespread, lots of nice normal decent people honestly believed that they’d never even met a gay person.   I had that very statement made to me, back in the early 1980s, by someone who didn’t realize that at least two other people at that dinner party were… not straight!

    In a weird cartoon fashion, the Trump Maladministration has been like that, but for racism.  Lots of nice, decent white people who honestly believed ‘Nobody *I* know is racist’ have witnessed ugly meltdowns among their loved ones revealing, whoops — hardcore white supremacists.  Of course they always knew that, well, Uncle Jayson had grown up in a different era… but now their young cousins are sharing memes about ‘PInochet helicopter rides’ and ‘Six million was not enough.’…

  135. 135.

    Bruuuuce

    January 9, 2021 at 7:36 pm

    Belly laugh of the day: Trump considering Giuliani and Dershowitz for impeachment defense team

  136. 136.

    tokyokie

    January 9, 2021 at 7:53 pm

    @Baud:

    Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but I think Donald Trump inciting a deadly riot at the U.S. Capitol will make the Trumps radioactive in a long-term sense.

    Until they appear on Dancing with the Stars.

    Where fatso will stomp on his partner’s feet and fall over, then claim that the judges were biased and the whole show is rigged.

  137. 137.

    Kent

    January 9, 2021 at 8:17 pm

    @burnspbesq:Keep in mind that the most relevant part of Merrick Garland’s resume is running the Oklahoma City investigation and prosecution. Shit is going to get all too real for the insurrectionists.

    As well as the Unabomber and Atlanta Olympics bombing investigations and prosecutions.  There is probably no one in the government who has spent more time prosecuting white supremacist terrorists.  Or at least not very many.

  138. 138.

    A woman from anywhere (formerly Mohagan)

    January 9, 2021 at 8:48 pm

    @JMG: Aren’t those islands going to be flooded pretty soon due to global warming? Oh, so sad.

  139. 139.

    glc

    January 9, 2021 at 8:49 pm

    @Gary K: Well we are, actually, but not the specific one you’re worried about.

    Next Groundhog Day, if I see my shadow, I will remain indoors for 6 more months.

    Actually, if anyone reports seeing their shadow on Groundhog Day, I will remain indoors for 6 more months.

  140. 140.

    Don P.

    January 9, 2021 at 8:51 pm

    @Betty Cracker: I think there’s a chance that DJT may end up radioactive in a Polonium sense.

  141. 141.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 9:44 pm

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA: next thing you know they’re storming Cole’s place in WestbyGodVirginia!

    In retrospect, it was foolish of him to post that map showing the fields of fire of the gun emplacements.

  142. 142.

    Ken

    January 9, 2021 at 9:45 pm

    @Don P.: Novichok’s cheaper.

  143. 143.

    Sm*t Cl*de

    January 9, 2021 at 10:02 pm

    @JanieM:

    But I did like that line about how praying people should pray, and others should hope

    If you encounter a clever phrase or a bon mot from George Will, there is a good chance that he stole it from J. K. Galbraith (along with “condign punishment”).

  144. 144.

    Etaoin Shrdlu

    January 9, 2021 at 10:04 pm

    @Emma from FL: I can’t imagine that Trump, being Trump, was ever admitted or would ever gain admittance to that level of New York society. And if he believed that was possible he’s even dumber than I thought he was.

  145. 145.

    boatboy_srq

    January 9, 2021 at 10:10 pm

    @SFAW: There’s little “confirmation”, but Buchanan and King were… close. There are hints of more, but apparently there’s also been deliberate destruction of correspondence and journals, so it is impossible to do more than suggest that there was something deeper than typical between the two. Political opponents tried to make hay of the relationship, and historians ever since have speculated, but no actual proof. Still, there were no women in Buchanan’s life after an early flirtation with Anne Coleman, and King was a regular guest at Buchanan’s WH.

  146. 146.

    SFAW

    January 9, 2021 at 10:14 pm

    @WaterGirl:

    Is confirmed bachelor double-secret code for gay?

    So I was told, many years ago. Whether that term is still in use, I have no idea.

  147. 147.

    SFAW

    January 9, 2021 at 10:18 pm

    @Don P.:

    I think there’s a chance that DJT may end up radioactive in a Polonium sense.

    At first, I was going to pooh-pooh that idea, because I thought Putin would not do something so obvious. Then I thought about how Putin’s primary goal was to destabilize/divide the USA, and that poisoning his asset would drive the RWMFs through the roof, thinking that the Lie-berals did it, even if there were photos/videos of Kislyak forcing it down Trump’s throat.

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