Got myself hosed off and threw on the dress overalls, made sure I had my voter registration card and driver’s license, and loaded up the family truckster and headed on over to the County Courthouse. When I got there, there were about three ladies and a grumpy old man (not my dad) ahead of me, and as I waited, a couple more women trickled in behind me.
The wait was brief, about ten minutes, and the county clerk said they had already had 150 voters and it was only 11:30, which is quite a lot for my neck of the woods. Because I am rule breaker, when she said that, I announced loud enough for everyone to hear that “I’m sure there are a lot of people like me who are pretty darn sick and tired of a certain you know who” and the clerk hushed me because no politicking and several of the women there giggled and two of them nodded at me in agreement.
Finally got in the booth and was filling my ballot out and the grumpy old man (again, not me or my dad) was fussing with his thing as he reviewed his votes and then bellowed “I didn’t want to vote for that damned Donald Trump” and an attendant rushed over to reset it, and it was my turn to giggle. I was also pleasantly surprised that he was voting for Biden because I just sort of figured he was the Trump demographic.
I reviewed my ballot, printed it, and handed it to the county clerk and told her “I normally don’t vote for people running unopposed because I don’t want to encourage them, but you seem to have it really well put together here so I voted for you anyway,” and she blushed and shushed me again.
And my civic duties are complete for 2020. Fuck Donald Trump.
Then went to my favorite hole in the wall and got a garden omelette with hash browns, a black coffee and a large ice cold glass of milk, flirted with the homely waitress and then overtipped. Headed out in pursuit of a non racist barber.. Wait. Did I tell you my barber story? I don’t remember.
A couple weeks ago I ventured out of the bunker to get my hair did, as I had been shaving it myself all year, and figured I might as well get a cut before the third peak of covid, and went to my barber. I’ve been going to here for over a decade, since I moved back to Bethany, and we were friendly and she did pet rescue and the like. I knew she was a Trump supporter in 2016 and she knows I am a pink commie who will argue with her and not take her shit, but we had come to terms with it. At any rate, halfway through the cut she asked me what I thought about Black Live Matters and I said “They do and I support it” and she started into a racist tirade about looting and “those people just don’t want to work” and things like that. I was kinda shocked into silence, and just got up, paid, and left, called my dad because he goes there too, and said “we need to find a new barber.” Kinda sad, because I have only had two barbers since 1992, but I can’t support that shit. I guess what I have learned is you scratch any diehard Trump supporter and underneath you find a Klan hood.
At any rate, headed to the city of Steubenville, which has a decent sized black population (at least for around here), and was going to go to a black owned barbershop, the logic being they were less likely to be RACIST AS FUCK than all the white ones around here, not to mention the best haircuts I have ever had were by the black barbers in the Army and by the one Kuwaiti guy who cut my hair on base in the Persian Gulf. Alas, they were closed, so I will have to try again in the next few days. I took a picture of their hours so next time I won’t fuck it up and show up on the wrong day.
And the annual voting tradition is now over.
Amanda in the South Bay
grimaces in Oregonian at that foreign phrase
WereBear
Shocking, but so often proven to be true.
AntiCliche
i think you should write a book. maybe just compile all the best posts ever and slap a cool title (like one of the rotating chyrons here) on it. as for content, “tire rims and anthrax” comes to mind. and this one.
Maeve
I voted Monday which was the first early voting day in Alaska. Took 57 minutes. Probably could have had less of a line if I waited a few days, but I couldn’t wait.
Ruckus
It’s what’s in the hood that’s important. Of course you are right about what’s always under the hood.
pinacacci
I want a picture of the half-a-haircut.
Omnes Omnibus
From what we have seen of you and what you have said to us over the years, what makes you think you are able to judge the quality of a haircut?
trollhattan
Feels good, doesn’t it? (Getting the voting done and dusted, IDK about that other mess and haven’t had a proper haircut since it was technically still winter.)
Martin
After the Rudy pics and watching some of AOCs twitch stream last night, I’ve decided that nobody over the age of 40 should be allowed to vote. We blew it guys. It’s clear we’re just not responsible enough.
Mary G
It feels good to have it done, finally. Feels more like 40 years we’ve been waiting.
James E Powell
Ya done good, Johnny!
Martin
@Omnes Omnibus: Well, he references the Army, so I think ‘do I still have hair’ means ‘good haircut’.
Ann Marie
I was planning to vote in person here in Philadelphia but now I may be acting as one of the Democratic Party’s observers for counting the ballots (which will not leave time for in-person voting). Fortunately, I already have my mail-in ballot and can drop it off at City Hall. I was looking forward to voting in person.
?BillinGlendaleCA
I doubt I could find my voter registration card…I moved my registration from Ventura to LA county back during the Reagan administration.
Redshift
The sheer laziness of racists is always striking. WTF does “those people don’t want to work” have to do with protesting against getting shot by police? If you’re going to use a tired racist stereotype in response to protests that your propaganda network is telling you are burning down cities, at least have enough self-respect to come up with violence rather than laziness when you’re pulling vicious lies out of your ass.
Redshift
@Martin: Hmm, or maybe proportional weighting of votes according to how many years you’re likely to have to live with the consequences of who wins…
Omnes Omnibus
@Martin: Nah, one can get a good haircut in the army. One just has to try.
mrmoshpotato
@Martin:
Riiiiight. Because governing is about playing video games and not, ya know, counting votes and taking care of your constituents’ concerns.
Btw, I’m under 40.
And why would you lump all people over 40 in with that ghoulish perv?
Omnes Omnibus
@Martin: Don’t fucking lump me in with Rudy.
SiubhanDuinne
Brooke County has more than one grumpy old man?! I’m shocked, is what I am.
Martin
@mrmoshpotato: It wasn’t about playing video games. It was about getting half a million people to attend a GOTV event using a mechanism that most politicians have never even heard about.
mrmoshpotato
@Martin: Fair enough. Creative GOTV tactic.
Omnes Omnibus
@Martin: You still have no right to equate us with Rudy. I expect an apology.
mrmoshpotato
@Omnes Omnibus:
@Martin: And 40 is your cut-off age? I wouldn’t want 40-year-olds making decisions about Medicare and Social Security that I rely on.
mrmoshpotato
Plausible.
kindness
Good riddance to idiot barbers. Don’t give losers your hard earned monies.
different-church-lady
Someone on the now-deleted Rudy-texting-with-Ivanka post was asking about a Social Security number scam. Info:
https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/blog/2018/12/fake-calls-about-your-ssn
“…(often, he says it happened in Texas)…”
charon
Received my ballot the 13th, filled it out that evening. Postman picked it up on the 14th.
Checked the status this AM, it has been signature verified and counted, so DONE!
This is in AZ, Maricopa county where most people vote by mail.
Ken
I always wondered how the society in Logan’s Run came about.
To be serious though, I trust the under-40 crowd more than I do McConnell, Mnuchin, and company.
different-church-lady
@Ken: I was in fifth grade when Logan’s Run came out. And I and all my friends agreed that mandatory euthanasia at the age of 30 was actually a really great idea.
Omnes Omnibus
@Ken: Would you trust a 38 y/o McConnell or Mnuchin? I thought not.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Omnes Omnibus: What if they were on Twitch? Adds instant credibility.
Omnes Omnibus
@different-church-lady: Die young, stay pretty.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@different-church-lady: Don’t trust anyone over 30, man.
Ceci n est pas mon nym
Too chicken. Instead, I just ordered men’s hair ties because it’s gotten to about that stage. And will likely stay that way till at least spring.
We got our mail ballots a little over a week ago and took them directly to the county election office instead of mailing back. There was a steady stream of voters doing the same.
Since I found out about this site tracking early voting, I’ve been obsessively checking it to see whether our PA county was registering the votes. It has been stuck at 1% of ballots returned for days and I was beginning to get anxious.
Today it jumped to 14% (most other counties in the state are around 30-50%) so I’m slightly less anxious.
Overall, 1.2 million PA ballots have been returned, 72% of them from Democrats.
?BillinGlendaleCA
@Omnes Omnibus: Worked for James Dean(who was a Bruin).
WaterGirl
Oh my god, can’t you guys keep your hands off your peckers at least until the previous threads about guys fussing with their thing have gone off the front page???!!
Omnes Omnibus
@?BillinGlendaleCA: Apparently.
SiubhanDuinne
Old person here. What the fuck is Twitch? FFS, I’m not even used to Tick-Tock yet. In fact, Twitter just seems like a briefer, lazier form of email.
Harrumph.
Ceci n est pas mon nym
Years ago, I was working a job at a Navy base. We were installing experimental equipment on several ships. Due to long hours and general neglect when it comes to getting my hair cut, I was getting pretty shaggy. And then we went to sea for several weeks of exercises.
So I decided to ask the ship’s barber, a young enlisted sailor, to do my hair. He was really thrilled to have so much hair to work with. Couldn’t stop talking about it.
It probably was a decent haircut, but I don’t remember. Mainly I just wanted it shorter till the next time. See “general neglect when it comes to getting my hair cut.”
MisterForkbeard
@Martin: I think I’d be happy with my last ever presidential vote happening for Biden and against Trump. :)
different-church-lady
The only thing more insufferable than the olds dissing on the youngs is the the youngs dissing on the olds.
And vice versa.
matryoshka
I voted today too, the State of Misery (hallooo Ozark & others). I guess I can say I have something in common with Cole, besides being so tired of this shit I could scream. I actually have pretty good hair.
WaterGirl
@SiubhanDuinne: Sorry SD, but twitter is just links with pictures.
MisterForkbeard
@SiubhanDuinne: Twitch is for livestreaming yourself playing games, mostly. Not something I spent much time on, but I have a few acquaintances who do it and make a small amount of money at it.
SiubhanDuinne
@MisterForkbeard:
Okaaaay. Thanks.
SiubhanDuinne
@WaterGirl:
I don’t have a Twitter account, but there are a few people I “follow” (except I don’t think it can accurately be called following) — Daniel Dale and Aaron Rupar, for instance, both tell me what le canard à l’orange is up to without my having to actually watch.
Patricia Kayden
RaflW
I delivered our household’s two ballots to Minneapolis City Elections on Monday. We’d requested mail ballots, and decided to vote ’em but not post them. The drive up/park/drop outside to a staffed location was easy.
In MN, one can deliver up to three signed, sealed ballots in addition to your own. You have to provide ID for dropping anyone else’s ballot, and record the info on a page with your own info and signature, so that any ‘ballot harvesting’ claims can be handled later. ID is not required to vote or deliver your own ballot in MN. We defeated that at the polls in 2012 (along with defeating an anti-marriage bill).
The outdoor queue to vote early in person was moderate, but it was also 33 deg and flurrying enough to be annoying but not accumulating. Love the hearty MN voters!
eta: By Tuesday night, I could see on the MN s.o.s. web site that my ballot was accepted and is awaiting counting on election day. So I feel like I’ve successfully voted. Yay!
ant
On the over 40 bit…..
I have this pet hypothesis:
Pretty much, everyone older than that has had brain damage from leaded gas. The wires in your brain that connect the feeling you get from guilt/remorse to you, got degraded in everyone older than this.
Of course women have more robust circuits in this area from genetics. But there has been a shift toward anti-social personalities/sociopathology in everyone aged 40-80 years old, with a particularly noticeable affect on people aged 45-60 from the higher lead levels in the years of their childhoods.
We are ruled by sociopaths with no conscience.
The vast majority of these people live in the closet with their condition, and were mostly politically apathetic in the pre-Trump days.
Pollsters have difficulty accounting for them because they are all to a one pathological liars.
Paul W.
A little sad that Paula Jean’s name didn’t come up once on this blog that is founded by a West Virginian, yeah I get her odds are low but… so are McGrath’s and several other candidates we discuss and fundraise for.
Anyways, gripes aside glad to hear from the big guy!
Quaker in a Basement
I am continually amazed by the number of white people who know fuck all about Black Lives Matter.
Nora Lenderbee
@ant: OTOH, over-40s had a lot less exposure to 24-7 TV and violent video games, the brain-rotting effects of which are obvious to everyone except the under-40s.
mrmoshpotato
@Ken:
I agree with this in so far that the under-40 crowd will fuck things up through selfishness and idiocy (Ewwwww! Hillary! Bernie would’ve won!) instead of being outright flamethrower-carrying crooks burning everything they can’t steal.
Omnes Omnibus
@ant: So you are saying that, if I kill and eat you, I have an excuse?
mrmoshpotato
@different-church-lady: Definitely not handing the keys and credit cards over to 10-year-olds. ?
mrmoshpotato
@WaterGirl: LMAO!
WaterGirl
@Quaker in a Basement: It’s not hard. It’s right there in the F-ing name!
WaterGirl
@mrmoshpotato: Oh, good. I thought maybe my comment was invisible. :-)
bluefoot
@MisterForkbeard: My nephew has his chess games on Twitch – he’s been competing in the youth leagues. It’s pretty fun, actually, to listen to the commentary.
(Yes, I am a nerd.)
ant
No.
I still expect you to be able to use logic to calibrate your moral compass. You should still be able to figure out that spending the rest of your life in prison is not in your best interest.
You could always do like Eddie Gallagher for example. Or become a State Department security engineer like Byron Smith, or a prosecutor, or a cigarette company CEO, or a Cop, or any other number of possibilities if you wish to kill people without consequence.
Or you could just be the garden variety type like this women: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bz6pvm-GxoI
or the man in the background here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HEFmFOlSaQ
Omnes Omnibus
@ant: I am 56. By your theory, I’ve had a lot of lead. I might fancy my chances.
opiejeanne
@different-church-lady: My mom was 30, Dad was 32 when I was born, so that doesn’t work.
Also, had the second kid at 29 (husband age 32), 3rd at 32. So that doesn’t work so well either.
mrmoshpotato
Well played, Bubble Genius. Well. Played.
What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us?
I had my Caucasian hair cut at one of the local black-owned and operated barber shops here in Takoma Park, MD. It didn’t go well. I chalk it up to the fact that there is a vast difference between my hair, which has but a gentle wave, and tightly curled AA hair, and someone who spends 99.9% of their time cutting the latter is a little bit out to sea when dealing with the former. Maybe I should try one of the other ones and see how it goes.
J R in WV
@Ceci n est pas mon nym:
When I was in the Navy, not long before my discharge I had an injury for which they put me in a rigid neck brace. So for the next several weeks I just combed my hair back, under that medical equipment.
Then came my appointment with the clerk to prep for my discharge the next day. He was a PO2 lifer, and said if I wanted my discharge to process the next day I needed to show up with a regulation haircut !
So my next stop was with the base barber shop, where I got the high and tight cut that was the only one they were authorized to give. All was good, the next day I became a civilian, albeit one with short hair.
. . . . . . . . . ;~)
ant
possibly.
Are you a gun nut that sits around daydreaming about how you could get away with killing somebody under the color of law?
The stand your ground people need not worry about regret, or guilt, or any of that mushy stuff other people have to deal with.
They also have nothing to fear from lie detector tests.
Dan B
My Mike-guy and I voted mail ballots in drop boxes. There were so many great candidates! And the Biden / Harris goodness, YES!
After November 4th it could be very rough. Our “gay-married” friends with kids are terrified.
RSA
I had an odd barber experience several years ago, when living in a different city. In the nearest strip mall to my house there was a barbershop that almost always had people in it, Black barbers and Black clientele. One day, on an errand at a nearby store, I realized I needed a haircut and stopped in. It ended up okay but not great—my barber seemed to be an expert with clippers and razors and such, but never once used scissors. So I learned something about how I want my Asian/European hair to be trimmed.
HumboldtBlue
James Randi has died.
Low key fuck 2020.
J R in WV
@HumboldtBlue:
Well, he was 92… that’s a pretty good run for anyone. RIP to a great magician!
Nora Lenderbee
Time for some ant pie.
namekarB
I’m 73 years old and f I hear someone make a racist comment I call them out. I do not call them a racist but I do remark that their comment sure sounded racist. The best comeback I ever heard about Black Lives Matter was when a friend asked another how to tell the difference between protests and riots. The answer was that Fox news reports about either white protesters or black rioters and looters.
Ruckus
@Ceci n est pas mon nym:
As I really don’t grow hair on the top of my head, and haven’t for some time, I just cut mine short with a trimmer (hair, not hedge) and be done with it. A cousin went fairly bald in his twenties and he now has far more hair than I do, because he hasn’t lost any more. Anyway, I got to the don’t worry about it stage a long time ago and it’s made my life a lot easier.
Ruckus
Double post.
Uncle Cosmo
Just FTR: E-mail from MD State Board of Elections sent 11:56 21 Oct 2020: My ballot rec’d by Baltimore City BoE yesterday. Should be counted & banked well before E-Day. From mail-in ballot request to notification of ballot receipt, elapsed time 11 days. In a time of COVID and USPS woes, not too shabby.
(ETA: Will be getting shorn by my Sicilian barber this weekend, should set up right nice for the holidays, such as they will be in The Year Of Perfect Hindsight.)
Rand Careaga
@Martin:
It’s clear that Martin is taking himself out of the franchise here, but like others, I ain’t buying it. I have been voting against Republicans for president for longer than most of the regulars here, and for longer than several of you have been alive. Yeah, I went third-party forty years ago, and John Anderson was a decent man, but that’s a vote I’d take back if I could. Hard to believe, but there was a time when “President Ronald Reagan” seemed as outlandish a notion as “President Donald Trump.” But although my Boomer cohort includes a lot of deplorable old farts, there are plenty of us who soured on the GOP back during Nixon’s political resuscitation, and who have kept the faith. Unfortunately, the latter category is perhaps under-represented in the Upper Midwest/Rust Belt.
We have learned by now, I trust, never to underestimate the potential depravity of the American electorate. Vote early and often!
grandmaBear
I dropped my ballot off at the local board of elections last Friday and the web site still doesn’t show it as received. The website says it can take up to 10 days to show on the site. Grrrr.
Ramalama
@Amanda in the South Bay: Yeah, like WTF is that? I’ve lived & voted living in 4 different states. Never a voter card. Never a fekkin voting cahd.
Suzanne
My voter registration card arrived in the mail today! This tipping-point state got three new diehard Dem voters.
Ramalama
This passage reminds me of the most excellent book I’ve read (okay, one of 4) this year: What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Blacker. I slow-read it, not wanting it to end, that’s how good it was. Is. It’s sooooo good. Funny as all get out. Compelling. Heartbreaking. I loved this book.
I love this post.
Chief Oshkosh
@ant: Meh. Everyone has a hypothesis. Or three. The key is: How’re you go to test it?
EmbraceYourInnerCrone
@Paul W.: I have donated to her on my own a couple times and will again today
Felanius Kootea
@Ceci n est pas mon nym: Completely off topic, but every time I see your nym, the Awilo song “Je m’appelle, comment tu t’appelle” pops into my head and I can’t get rid of it. Drives me crazy.