Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

There will be lawyers.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Shocking, but not surprising

Verified, but limited!

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if I ever tried to have some of you killed.

The math demands it!

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Where tasty lettuce and good mustard aren’t elitist.

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

I’m going back to the respite thread.

Too inconsequential to be sued

Let there be snark.

How do you get liars to care about the truth?

The willow is too close to the house.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

Nevertheless, she persisted.

They are all Michael Cohen now.

Fuck if i know. i just get yelled at when i try it.

I did not have this on my fuck 2020 bingo card.

I’m only here for the duck photos.

This fight is for everything.

I really should read my own blog.

We still have time to mess this up!

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Kannon Recreates a Famous Painting

Kannon Recreates a Famous Painting

by | 111 Comments

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satby, aka Grandma Sharon, sent these this morning.
Too awesome not to share.


BARTOLOMEO PASSAROTTI, PORTRAIT OF A MAN WITH A DOG, 1585, MUSEI CAPITOLINI


KANNON (LAST NAME WITHHELD), PORTRAIT OF A YOUNG MAN WITH A DOG, 2020, BALLOON JUICE

*****

Kannon had one of those art projects for school where they recreate a famous painting.  This was his. Great job, Kannon!  Another Artist in Our Midst?

If we’re lucky, Kannon and Pat and Holly might join us and tell us how they made the costume and how they got the pup to sit still long enough to take the pictures.

Open Thread.

Reader Interactions

111Comments

  4. 4.

    scav

    GOOD Dog!! Good sitter!

  8. 8.

    West of the Cascades

    Fabulous!! Thank you!

  10. 10.

    satby

    @Roger Moore: close, according to mom Holly. Took about two days of training and several outtakes.

    That’s the puppy that Holly found tied to a tree about a month (?) ago. WaterGirl shared his sweet “just rescued in the car” picture on a pet thread.

  11. 11.

    SiubhanDuinne

    That’s wonderful! Thanks!

    I wrote the lyrics to a song called The Ronavirus Blues. Have sent the text to my country-rock musician brother to come up with a tune for it, or at least some chords.

    Well, I got no Rona symptoms,
    And I’m feelin’ pretty fine.
    But it’s gettin’ mighty borin’
    When I walk that Rona line.
    I got the Ronavirus-19 blues.

    I had some cabin fever.
    All I did was ask.
    But they said, “No, you can’t go outside
    Without you wear a mask.”
    I got the mask-wearin’ Ronavirus blues.

    Couldn’t see no doctor,
    Couldn’t see no nurse.
    The Rona gonna make me sick
    Or maybe sumthin’ worse.
    I got the mask-wearin’, stay-inside, Ronavirus blues.

    Well, my man done up and left me,
    He took the pickup truck.
    He took the dog, the cat, the gun,
    But I don’t give a fuck,
    Because I got the blues, the mask-wearin’, stay-inside, hope-he-gets-the-Ronavirus blues.

    Now I ain’t scared of dyin’,
    I ain’t got no fear:
    But I’m low on toilet paper,
    And I’m runnin’ out of beer.

    So listen, all you children,
    Here’s the modern drill:
    If the Rona doesn’t kill you
    Then the isolation will.

    I got the stay-inside, quarantine, wash-your-hands, wear-a-mask, social-distance, touch-me-not, runnin’-low-on-toilet-paper, Ronavirus-19 blues.

  20. 20.

    Sab

    OT: Our metroparks levy passed 3 to 1. Also, the crazy lady in the reopen zomby picture at the Ohio Statehouse lost to her more normal Republican competitor. She was the challenger. He was the incumbent. She had to go over the top to win but it failed. Hope she didn’t bring virus back to her county.

  25. 25.

    WaterGirl

    @SiubhanDuinne: That is truly awesome.  Front page-worthy one might say.  Perhaps Saturday night?

    edit: that gives your country-rock musician brother 3 days to come up with a tune, record it, and post it on YouTube so we can link to it here, with the lyrics.  I hope he’s not a slacker like you!  :-)

  27. 27.

    Kay (not the front-pager)

    @SiubhanDuinne: I was eating almonds! Do you know how hard chewed up almonds are to clean off my monitor???

    Seriously, I hope you get that set to music, cuz I really want to hear it. That’s even funnier than the sweet young music teacher who wrote a song that consisted of a scream.

  31. 31.

    WaterGirl

    Note sent by satby, surely written by someone who was there for the “filming”:

    The only part of this that took a lot of prep was making the white collar, and then training Odie to sit and stay for two days. We finally got the picture when we stopped trying to get his paws on Kannon’s chest lol.

  36. 36.

    Kay (not the front-pager)

    Young Man with a Dog 2020 has a very knowing, Mona Lisa-like gaze and smile. I’m sure he and his pup are up to something… ;-)

    I use those washable Crayola markers to mark fabric in sewing because they really do wash out. Great use of materials.

  38. 38.

    WaterGirl

    @Yutsano: I know!  How does anyone tie a dog like that (or any dog) to a tree and leave them there with a sign???

    But we won’t dwell on that, since Odie got himself a good home.

  45. 45.

    Kay (not the front-pager)

    @WaterGirl: Aw, what a cutie! I’m no dog person, but he looks like some kind of terrier mix? A good dog for a young man anyway, and the by look he’s giving he clearly adores him.

  46. 46.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @WaterGirl: We’re doing a Zoom family reunion tomorrow night. I’ll ask if he thinks he can cobble something together by the weekend.

  51. 51.

    Elizabelle

    @SWMBO:   His link, to satirist Andy Borowitz:

    Pence Starts Wearing Mask After Fauci Says It Will Protect Him from Women
     

    WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Vice-President Mike Pence has started wearing a mask after Anthony Fauci told him that it will protect him from women, Fauci has confirmed.

    After seeing video of a maskless Pence touring the Mayo Clinic, on Tuesday, Fauci said, “I knew I had to come up with something fast” to get through to Pence.

    Fauci immediately got on the phone with the Vice-President and informed him that “clinical research” had demonstrated that a mask is “an effective female-repellent.”

    “I told him that wearing a mask would protect him from 99.99 per cent of all women,” Fauci said. “He seemed very impressed.”

    In an official statement, the Vice-President thanked Fauci for his excellent advice and indicated that he would start wearing a mask at all times, including at home.

  58. 58.

    laura

    @WaterGirl: if that face does say please love me I’ll eat a bug. That portrait is so beautiful and probably going to be a cherished family memory of a terrible time made better by love and art.

  59. 59.

    Kay (not the front-pager)

    @SiubhanDuinne: Twitter Actually I guess it’s TikTok but I saw it on Twitter so that’s where I linked to.

    ETA I see someone already added a link to the Tik Tok original. I’m slow today (as I am every day).

  60. 60.

    TomatoQueen

    Oh Odie you sweet pup, landed on your paws, didn’t you. So glad for you and your new and loving family.

  62. 62.

    Major Major Major Major

    RWNJ twitter is flipping out over this De Blasio tweet, which rightly puts the ultra-orthodox community in Brooklyn on blast for continuing to have huge gatherings. Each funeral creates more funerals.

  69. 69.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    @Zzyzx: It occurs to me that for some reason Trump hasn’t yet written an Executive Order for a statue of himself on the Mall. Maybe replacing Lincoln’s in the Lincoln Memorial.

  71. 71.

    Ceci n est pas mon nym

    Lock-in deep thoughts: Today I learned that being beaten in the head with a wagging tail is a very strange sensation.

    My frequent hangout these days is the living room sofa, and the dog has adopted as his hangout the top of the sofa behind my head, where he can look out the front windows and keep us safe from arriving packages, people walking by, squirrels on the porch, etc.

    He’s usually snoozing up there or barking hysterically (preferably within a couple of inches of my now-deaf left ear), but today my wife came in and started talking to him, which triggered the above-mentioned furious tail wagging.

    As I said, very odd sensation.

  77. 77.

    mrmoshpotato

    Hilarious, harmless oops = good.

    Send link to associates showing application of force majeureRealizes link is about Victoria's SecretSends email emphasizing that ONLY SENDING VICTORIA'S SECRET EMAILS IN STRICT CONTEXT OF CONTRACTUAL ANALYSISAssociates: pic.twitter.com/E03rAFopCi— MilestoneAchievingHat (@Popehat) April 29, 2020

  79. 79.

    Brachiator

    Coming late to the thread…

    KANNON (LAST NAME WITHHELD), PORTRAIT OF A YOUNG MAN WITH A DOG, 2020, BALLOON JUICE

    Great job!

    A fun bit of whimsy to start the day.

  80. 80.

    hedgehog the occasional commenter

    @Zzyzx: What the fuck?

    In other news, got the “Hey I sent you munnies!” letter from Fat Bastard.  Right to the recycle bin.

    In happier comments, lurv Kannon and pup!

  81. 81.

    Brachiator

    @hedgehog the occasional commenter:

    In other news, got the “Hey I sent you munnies!” letter from Fat Bastard. Right to the recycle bin.

    I was thinking of saving mine for emergency toilet paper?

    Damn, the self-aggrandizing SOB doesn’t let any opportunity slip for an ego-stroke.

  84. 84.

    cain

    The guy in the original painting looks like a total start up tech bro. Just need to add a macbook somewhere nearby.

    Great job by Kannon ! :)

  87. 87.

    Barbara

    When I see the reconstructed pictures — and this is a really good effort on Kannon’s part — I am usually struck by how amazing the original was.  The expression on both the dog’s and the human’s face in the original are striking, and what really comes through is the bond between the two.  My dentist had copies of original Vargas and Lempicka pictures, side by side with “reconstructions” to show the effect of various cosmetic enhancements.  The originals were just so much better at depicting the personality of their subjects.

  89. 89.

    Brachiator

    @schrodingers_cat: 

    From the morning thread. Irrfan Khan died of complications due to cancer, he was 54.

    As I noted in another thread, I did not know his work well, and have a couple of his films on my watch list.

    I note how respected and loved he was by many of his colleagues. This message really stood out.

    Khan’s fellow Bollywood star Sonam Kapoor shared a photo of them together on Instagram, declaring: “You have no idea what your kindness meant to me at a time I was at my least confident.”

    A great loss, but it is good to see the degree to which his memory is treasured by so many people.

  90. 90.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    @Zzyzx:

    The White House Gift Shop is a private, for-profit company based in Lancaster County, PA. It has no connection to the White House, the Secret Service or any part of the U.S. government. It’s somewhere between the Franklin mint and a scam.

  91. 91.

    J R in WV

    @Kannon: 

    Great job, the set up, costumery, makeup, good dog, nice photo.

    If any of the out-takes are funny, please send them in as well, humor is the best defense against our situation.

  92. 92.

    Barbara

    I looked at the IHME stats, and on April 27, they predicted that “the COVID-19 epidemic’s first wave could cause 74,073 cumulative deaths (estimate range 56,563 to 130,666) in the US. The total from today’s release is higher than average predictions published on April 22 (67,641, with an estimate range of 48,058 to 123,157), though the uncertainty intervals still overlap considerably.”

    The lower range of 56,563 was exceeded by the day on which they changed the estimate.  I don’t understand what data they are relying on.

  94. 94.

    Baud

    Very cool.  I do like the various recreations of paintings I’ve seen on the tubes.

    I hope this doesn’t mean we have to make Balloon Juice safe for minors.

  96. 96.

    Another Scott

    The BBC tells me that BoJo and his fiancee have a new baby boy today.

    But Number 10 won’t say how many children in total BoJo has now…

    “Oh that Boris, he’s such a loveable rake!!”

    Hmmm…

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  100. 100.

    WaterGirl

    @Baud: I haven’t read the morning thread yet but I heard you have the weird foot thing that can be part of COVID.  Quite distressing!  But I’m very glad to know that you don’t seem to have the other symptoms.   As always, I 💕Baud.

  102. 102.

    eddie blake

    oy. will read the other comments inna bit.

    just gotta vent. sandernista dead-enders are ALL over facebook pushing the reade allegation, despite oh, pretty much ALL the facts in the matter, and if you push BACK?

    you’re a ‘rape-apologist’.

    ok, not ‘you’. me.

  103. 103.

    Baud

    @WaterGirl: Thanks!  My doctor says they are seeing an uptick in that particular reaction. I may get an antibody test at some point to confirm whether I’ve had the virus, but I’m not going to make an unnecessary trip to the lab since I’ve being doing well otherwise.

  105. 105.

    LeftCoastYankee

    The next picture after this is “I’m going to lick that stuff of his face, it’s got to be food….”

    Very cool!

  111. 111.

    susanna

    @schrodingers_cat: One of my favorite actors, whom I first saw in the series, “In Treatment, Series 3,” then “The Lunch…” and found him captivating and stealing the spotlight from anyone else when he was performing.  That a loss!

    I’d like to know which of his films you’d recommend?

Comments are closed.