Weird how I’m caught off guard by Christmas every year. It’s an event that appears on the calendar, yet somehow it blindsides me. Right now our fake tree is mocking me from across the room, its component parts rudely protruding from the storage box while awaiting assembly.
Our annual Drunken Aunties Cookie Night will be Drunken Aunties Cookie Day this year (in fact, tomorrow) because there was no Saturday in December when everyone was free. We old aunties increasingly must accommodate the schedules of teens and young adults. It was easier when we could just order the little shits around. (Honestly, I’m grateful that THEY still put up with US.)
It will be a brunch event this year, and I have a feeling the schedule change will result in fewer drunken aunties and higher cookie production. That’s probably a good thing. Here are the featured goodies:
- Spritz cookies
- Cranberry pistachio biscotti
- Coconut macaroons
- Sugar cookie cutouts
- Buckeyes
- Espresso cookies
- Amaretto cookies
We have dozens of cookie cutters for the sugar cookie dough. Every year someone brings a few new ones, and we’ve been doing this since the turn of the century, so they accumulate. We’ve got Christmas-themed cutters, of course, but also dinosaurs, dragonflies, squirrels, Millennium Falcons, etc.
My favorite thing these days is making spritz cookies with the cookie press, which I call the “cookie gun” because it resembles and operates exactly like a caulk gun. So easy, so good!
Anyhoo, time to get off my ass and assemble that tree! Open thread!
Amir Khalid
It’s close enough to the holiday for the famous Austrian Christmas carol Stille Nacht, all six verses.
OzarkHillbilly
I want that cross stitch (first time I typed that it was “crass stitch” that might be more accurate.) also, who says “dinosaurs, dragonflies, squirrels, Millennium Falcons” aren’t Xmas themed?
JPL
Although little imp is only ten months, he is eating some solid food since he has six teeth. Anyway his dad won’t allow him to have sugar, but I think his grandma might be able to sneak him a sugar cookie X-Mas eve.
jeffreyw
@OzarkHillbilly:
She needs a Die Hard cookie cutter.
O. Felix Culpa
@JPL: Go for it! I remember when my sons were little and we went to a friend’s two-year-old birthday party. The poor kid’s puritan mother baked a sugar-free birthday cake. Most disgusting thing ever. As in all things, moderation, including allegedly “healthy” eating. ;-)
delk
For just the second time in 20 years we have a tree. My husband is Jewish and I am lazy. We were going to have one last year but between Gav dying and me fracturing my wrist it didn’t happen. We had our first tree 19 years ago and after two moves a true Christmas miracle has happened: all the lights are still working!
OzarkHillbilly
@jeffreyw: I got mine when they first came out. Greatest Xmas movie ever. Blows Rudolph right out of the sky.
jeffreyw
@OzarkHillbilly:
Yippee Ki Yay, M.. My good man!
OzarkHillbilly
@jeffreyw: Now I have a machine gun. Ho Ho Ho.
Miss Bianca
Ooh, cranberry pistachio biscotti! My dear companion D is quite the bisco-baker, and we have been looking for a holiday recipe! Do share, please!
Sab
Mincemeat filled oatmeal cookies!
@OzarkHillbilly: We love our shark cookie cutter. Also, I use the round biscuit cutter to make guinea pigs with red cinnamon candy eyes.
Jay
With family this year for the first time in a decade, so will be contributing to the sugar hoard.
Double Chocolate Dark Cherry Biscotti,
Candied Ginger Stained Glass Sugar Cookies,
Chocolate Sea Foam Tarts.
and because we will/are spending time with a Dog, ( the Perfect Gentleman, Axl), Dried Duck Liver Snaps.
OzarkHillbilly
@Sab:
I love it, would never have thought of that.
OzarkHillbilly
Holy shit, I just remembered. I have to make a poteca next wkend.
Steeplejack (phone)
@Betty Cracker:
Sign me up for the cranberry pistachio biscotti! Espresso and/or amaretto cookies accepted as backup.
Barbara
I will be making a couple of kinds of cookies, and not doing much else. My son has so much time off this year we decided to go skiing before Christmas, come back the day of and hopefully have a nice day after doing things we should have done the day before.
Jay
ThresherK
I may do some baking for Xmas but not sure yet, as our kitchen and oven are very small.
Non-standard seasonal traditions for us: The Ref, Laurel and Hardy’s Babes in Toyland, Blink 182’s I Won’t be Home for Christmas, and (despite its flaws) Trapped in Paradise.
JPL
Thanks to all of you who suggested the Howard Stern/Hillary tape. I found the entire tape on you tube.
Betty Cracker
@Miss Bianca: Here’s a link to the recipe we use.
@Steeplejack (phone): Will have to get back to you; my sister has the recipe cards for those two. The espresso cookies aren’t pretty. In fact, they look like petrified panda turds. But they taste good!
Dorothy A. Winsor
For several years after our son grew up and we went to his place for Christmas, I didn’t put up a tree. I just didn’t feel the need for Christmas cheer. Then one year, I saw small, artificial trees in Target and decided to buy one with the lights already on it. I’ve been putting it up and decorating every year since, and in the course of doing that, I realized we make our own cheer.
gene108
@Amir Khalid:
Singing it in middle and high school German class, when my voice was changing, is probably the funniest thing I have ever done, given the uproarious laughter from classmates and teachers
jeffreyw
Bah! Humbug!
Too soon?
Kayla Rudbek
For the Twin Cities jackals: https://www.twincities.com/2019/12/09/mounds-theatre-stages-its-an-honorable-life-a-klingon-variation-of-the-classic-film/. I was force fed the original movie every year in Catholic grade school so I absolutely hate that movie, but if I was visiting my parents, I’d take a chance on the play.
Jay
@JPL:
Tape? Batamax?
what’s next, AOL?
brantl
@Jay: I want all of those recipes.
JPL
@Jay: ha!
Steeplejack (phone)
Got up this morning to discover that my Internet connection is dead. Neither wired nor wi-fi connection is working. Tried resetting the cable modem and the router, no joy.
Had a tediously slow on-line chat with a Cox Cable rep. Person was friendly (as much as you can tell on a chat) but not super helpful. Basically IT Crowd “Turn it off and turn it back on.” Yes, thanks, I’m a techno-weenie; I did that.
So now I’m taking a break before I try to troubleshoot the cable modem. One useful thing the Cox rep did say was that this modem has been in use since September 2012. So it’s a bit long in the tooth. The lights are lit on the front of it, so it’s not dead, but my memory is that the rightmost one should be blinking, and it’s not. And when I turn the modem off and then back on, the lights don’t dance around before settling; they just come on in a fixed pattern. Again, my memory is that there should be a little light show before they settle.
So I need to look up my exact model number and get on the Google to do some research. Might be time to buy a new cable modem. Merry Christmas to me!
Jay
@Betty Cracker:
at least it’s not Wombat poop.
do you bake a loaf, cut it, then double bake it, or are they just formed and baked?
MattF
I’d have expected Baby Yoda cookies would be everywhere— but astonishingly, it seems that Disney was caught off-guard by the popularity of the little fella. So, we’re back to hand-made. Chocolate covered raisins for the eyes, bite off the ears first.
Baud
Via Reddit, I hadn’t seen this cartoon before but it is apt.
https://i.imgur.com/klNztXW.jpg
Steeplejack (phone)
@Betty Cracker:
Thanks, but don’t strain yourself at this stressful time of year. I’m good with the biscotti recipe.
Miss Bianca
@Betty Cracker: Muchas gracias!
MattF
@Steeplejack (phone): We had a power outage in the condo common areas last week. Power to the wiring cabinets failed, the backup battery system failed. Internet, VOIP phone service, TV service all went dead. So, people were introduced to the mysteries of personal hotspots. It took about a week to get back to sorta normal, including episodes of yelling at the disembodied voice in the Verizon phone tree.
debbie
@ThresherK:
I got a pint of Graeter’s Peppermint Stick and a jar of Bittersweet Chocolate Fudge Sauce. I’m set.
Aleta
From a lightweight Post article about cookies in the US. It has links to a few regional recipes.
…
…
debbie
@Steeplejack (phone):
My six-year-old modem died this year. I can’t deal with researching yet another thing, so I just had Spectrum give me whatever they use. The installer promised I wouldn’t have to pay more than I have been (the connection’s no speedier), but I am steeling myself for a price hike (and an argument) in the new year.
Jay
@brantl:
the Double Chocolate Dark Cherry Biscotti is just a standard chocolate biscotti recipie, except:
– slaked cocoa is used instead of regular
– Bakers Bittersweet Chocolate blocks are added for mor Chocolate!!!!!!
– unsweetened dried half cherries are added, then,
– when fully double baked and cooled, they are either half dipped in melted white chocolate, ( kids or sweet tooth), or just drizzled with melted white chocolate.
the Stained Glass Ginger Sugar Cookies are just any old sugar cookie recipie but:
– chop up candied ginger into 1/4 in or smaller chips and chunks and add to the dough. ( you can add fruit peel and candied cherries if you want the colours and more sweet),
– roll into a “log” in waxed paper and semi freeze,
– whirl around 1/4 candied ginger and 3/4 sugar, until fine and let sit,
– cut as thin as you can, sprinkle with the gingered sugar and bake.
the Chocolate Sea Foam tarts are just mini chocolate soufle ( I double the sugar) baked in a sweet tart shell.
the dog biscuits are just a standard liver dog biscuit mixed, with duck liver instead of beef liver, rolled very thin, rather than chunky.
Kirk Spencer
We had a small bake-off at work, so I made lemon bars. Only took second (by close vote) because the cheesecake that was brought was pretty close to perfect.
Unfortunately my beloved spouse has declared I must make more, soon. And more when that’s done.
Barbara
@MattF: We have a second house in an area with very suboptimal internet service options, and when we go there we always use personal hotspots. It’s actually less expensive and more reliable than the alternatives, at least if we are not there for an extended period of time. My personal favorite story is coming after hours to a hotel and them failing to leave me with the internet password, and me needing to get work done. We drove to a local McDonalds that was one of the only things still open, and I just sat in my car in the parking lot tapping into their Internet and drinking coffee.
dmsilev
My mom requested I bring fresh fruit when I visit for the holidays, since Southern California has year-round farmers markets with fresh berries and Boston …doesn’t. So, I was looking up whether a pound or so of strawberries would cause me grief with the TSA and found an exhaustive guide to what was and wasn’t allowed, including this:
Are airline policies different if it’s an emotional-support lobster?
Steeplejack (phone)
@debbie:
That’s a sub-issue for me. After seven years I can’t remember exactly, but I think I went out to a Cox store and bought the cable modem so I wouldn’t have to rent it at their exorbitant rate. But that may have been the router. Anyway, that’s an issue for after I determine whether the modem is really dead.
chris
This blended family will need all the cookies.
(Testing. Chrome vs Firefox)
Barbara
@debbie: We have been a customer of FIOS for so long that they usually fed ex us any replacement equipment that we need. That is pretty old for a router. The last time we had a problem, though, they actually had to reinstall the equipment that comes into the house.
Steeplejack (phone)
@MattF:
I’m using my phone now via cellular data, and I did think that I could set up a mobile hotspot, but I want to find out if the cable modem is really dead first.
Jay
@dmsilev:
yes, no bag, no water, no ice, they must wear their vest at all times and be on a leash. They are permitted to be exercised under their owners control once passengers are allowed to walk around the cabin.
No pooping or peeing is allowed.
No hot butter, nutcrackers, meat forks or bibs allowed.
Omnes Omnibus
@dmsilev: Aren’t all lobsters emotional support lobsters in their own way?
PST
We are on tree number seven. My wife likewise is Jewish, and after more than a half a century of no Christmas Trees, by marrying me she was able to throw herself into the fun of decorating one without letting the side down because it’s honoring my tradition. For a novice, she really surprised me with how definite her ideas were about how a tree should look.
dmsilev
@Omnes Omnibus: As in “Now that I’ve eaten a tasty lobster roll, I feel much better”?
Miki
Sounds like a fun time – please post pics (of the goodies, not necessarily the drunken aunts).
These are my Cranberry Pistachio Biscotti – I keep a stash of them in the freezer all year long. (Recipe I use is here.)
Tomorrow I’m making World Peace Cookies, Pistachio Cranberry Icebox Cookies (wanting something sweeter and more cookie-like than biscotti) and I might try these Unfussy Sugar Cookies (which I might fussify anyway). Drunkeness follows baking or it’ll never get done.
Steeplejack (phone)
@PST:
?
germy
Omnes Omnibus
@dmsilev: For example….
PST
@Steeplejack (phone): I’m perfectly okay were her tree ideas as long as we follow three simple rules: no tinsel, no tinsel, no tinsel. I don’t even know if they still make the awful stuff. One of my least favorite childhood Christmas memories is the annual ritual of taking tinsel off the tree and carefully restoring it to the package it came in so it could be used forever. My parents never got over being depression kids. This will be the first Christmas without either of them.
Suzanne
Funny, I’m doing cookies today, too. And spritz!
So I grew up living with my mom and her parents. My grandmother was a sour old lady, and she did the cooking until I was about twelve and she had a stroke. Anyway, she was a terrible cook, and she hated cooking, but didn’t want to let anyone else do it because she interpreted that as people showing off that they were better than she was at cooking. The psychodrama was ridiculous. Anyway, she made spritz cookies every year, and she always made a huge deal about how much effort it was. And she would make them, like, the first week of December and then not let anyone eat them until Christmas Day, and by then they were stale, of course. So I like to make a shitload—they’re incredibly easy and low-work, despite what she said—and share them with people.
So, if you’re crossing my path, please come over for some Irish coffee and spritz this evening.
germy
@PST:
Jesus! I thought I was the only one who had to do that. I remember what a letdown it always was. First the frustration of trying to get it neatly into the old package, and also the disappointment that Christmas was over.
mrmoshpotato
Can’t beat the traditional cookie cutter shapes passed down through generations – like the Millennium Falcon.
JMG
The small tree in the family/TV room and the outdoor wreath are up and decorated. Next, rearranging living room furniture for the big tree and setting it up to spread out before decoration tomorrow.
Kay
Yum. Expresso cookies. I don’t generally make cookies and I don’t care for store bought ones, but homemade cookies are delicious. I just make one Christmas cookie- rolled sugar cookies- exactly like my mother’s- then you decorate them with colored icing. My favorite part of the whole thing is mixing the food coloring with the icing. We’re not doing much this year because 3 of our 4 aren’t coming home and my daughter and son in law’s baby is due in 3 weeks so I took all my Christmas time off and put it toward baby time off in January. I bought him/her a book and a sweater already. The tiny sweater is adorable.
donnah
Great descriptions, as usual, Betty! Merry Christmas!
I actually put our artificial tree up a few days before Thanksgiving for the first time ever. We usually wait until after turkey day. We host a Thanksgiving dinner for family every year, and I wanted to show off. And I make sure not to take it for granted by sitting down every evening with all of the other lights in the rest of the room turned off, just to focus on our pretty tree and the ornaments we’ve collected over the years.
I’m on to bake cookies this Wednesday, with “help” from my mom. She’s 84 and has never been a great baker, so I usually have her sit at the kitchen table to keep me company. Her measuring skills are haphazard at best and she no longer has the strength to stir the stiff cookie dough, so we just chat while I do the work. she ends up taking nearly all of the cookies with her, though.
I hope everyone can have the best holiday possible. The political landscape is a constant storm, but I hope we can take a few moments to just find peace.
Gin & Tonic
@debbie: Graeter’s is the only thing worthwhile about Columbus.
Baud
@Omnes Omnibus:
Obligatory.
Miss Bianca
@dmsilev: Wow, that’s intense. And specific. I remember traveling with live lobsters from Maine back to Chicago once upon a time, but I don’t remember the process being that regimented. Just a bag full of lobsters, and a bunch of seaweed (to keep them…um…fresh.)
Of course, that was before 9/11.
Sigh.
Jay
So, with print and even digital media “failing”, or being bought out, how your Media Sausage get’s made has gone from “going pro” to “going weird”,
Newsweek, the venerable Time Clone has recently front paged Op Ed Pieces by Charlie Kirk and Andy Ngo.
Charlie Kirk is the “freeze peach on Campus” TPUSA grifter and Trumpista most famous in the twitterverse for having a Chapter wear adult diapers and drink milk to “own the Libs”. In anti-facist circles he most infamous for organizing radical KKKonservative speakers with Nazi “Security” to stage “events” on Campus that see innocent people assaulted and killed by the Reich Wing.
Andy Ngo is a danger to our communities and provides kill lists to AtomWaffen. He poses as a “journalist” to incite and provide highly edited propaganda for Nazis and has become an MSM “expert” on the non existant Antifa Organization and a media celebrity for getting a milkshake tossed at him after inciting a crowd, then faking a brain injury and raising over $120k from the Gullibillies and Comity pushers.
so anyway, back to Newsweek:
https://www.pastemagazine.com/articles/2018/03/newsweek-financial-engine-fora-cult.html
WaterGirl
@Steeplejack (phone): Dead or not, 2012 = it’s time for a new one. IMHO
narya
I’ve been baking 9-10 types of cookies, to pair with beer. (Annual tradition at a bar I frequent: they do tastes of 8-10 beers.) The last three batches are cooling in the fridge before I bake ’em all. I would be more enthused if I hadn’t over-served myself last night.
Miss Bianca
@Suzanne:
OMG, that sounds EXACTLY like my mother. Except she did make a few good things. For example, at holiday time I really wish I had her recipe for sherry cake. That thing was sweet enough to send you into sugar shock, but oh, yum!
MomSense
I just bought a fake tree. I have gone to the dark side.
Just One More Canuck
@germy: what about the fun of pulling it out of your cat’s ass after they ate some? Good times
i think that’s why they don’t make it anymore
MattF
@Baud: Classic essay by David Foster Wallace, Consider The Lobster.
WaterGirl
My tree has been up since before Thanksgiving. I have not decorated it yet. Betty, your post might give me just the boost I need in order to get that done. Might. I will be so happy once it’s up, yet I can’t seem to get myself to do it. Holiday blahs?
Jay
@germy:
yup, me too.
when we have a tree, there is however, tinsel on the tree, always. Victorian silvered metal tinsel, thin twisted sheet metal with hooks. Easy on, easy off, stores in a cardboard tube, no cats crawing around dragging poops still attached by threads of tinsel, no holiday Vet ER visits.
JPL
@Suzanne: I read the overnight thread and congrats might be in order.
Jay
@narya:
beer?
cookies?
both?
WaterGirl
OT, but I added comments and quotes to the General Stuck thread – for efgoldman, Schlemazel, Schlemizel, General Stuck, greennotGreen and Scotian.
Very excited to be able to report that ALL efgoldman original comments are not gone! It looks like we lost a big patch of them in 2016, but they appear to be there for 2017 and 2018!
Anyway, in case anyone wants to check back on that thread to see what was added:
https://balloon-juice.com/2019/12/13/general-stuck-comments-in-no-particular-order/#comment-7513564
Miss Bianca
@MomSense: And you live in Maine, tsk! For shame!//
Actually, our “Christmas tree” is a little glass light-up one (LED lights for the win!) that we ritually put in the window after the first of December. Since we are surrounded by evergreens up at the Mountain Hacienda, we can’t be bothered to cut one down and drag it into the house. We do enough tree-cutting all summer to make our firewood!
WaterGirl
Cookie production is important, of course! But am I the only one who is slightly disappointed that Drunken Aunties Cookie Night may be slightly, shall we say, less festive?
Brachiator
@delk:
I am not big on Christmas these days, but on my evening walks I pass by a lot selling Christmas trees. It’s fun to see little kids excitedly fast walking (’cause parents say “don’t run!”) among the trees, or soberly evaluating a tree selected. And many of the families smile with a kind of “mission accomplished” grin when they and the staff on the lot tie the tree everyone has decided on to the roof of the family’s vehicle.
delk
@PST: I kept telling him the first time that we had no ornaments or lights and that it’s a lot of hard work. I was working as a bartender and I told my regulars that I needed ornaments and everyone brought one in for me.
PST
@Just One More Canuck: I used to have a cat who loved to eat ribbon, so even after my tinsel days were done I still had the Christmas joy of pulling ribbon from a furry dispenser.
rikyrah
@MattF:
I am still unclear as to why Baby Yoda is a popular Twitter meme.
West of the Rockies
Our new dog, Sadie, a 12-week-old Sheepadoodle knows it’s Christmas. We’ve taken her on her first trip, two nights in Nevada City, CA. She adores the creek and floofy plants–perfect for sinking into and frolicking!
debbie
@Gin & Tonic:
Which is why I was so surprised to see Buckeyes on Betty’s baking list.
MattF
@rikyrah: NYT TV critic did a think-piece on that question.
debbie
@Miss Bianca:
My mom make great spritz cookies every Christmas, but she gave 99% away as gifts. We felt very unappreciated.
Miss Bianca
A propos of nothing in particular, I would just like to point out that all my open tabs on *both* browsers at this point (yeah, Safari and Firefox, each are better for different things, don’t judge) are either political articles or recipes.
Oh, except for the ones on endurance riding, since I am doing an article on an endurance rider this week.
MomSense
@Miss Bianca:
I needed to replace all my string lights this year and we are experiencing torrential rain and flash flooding so I just bought a pre-lit fake tree on sale instead of the lights.
I put it in the back of the house – my neighbors don’t need to know!
MomSense
@Brachiator:
You don’t see them later when they have to cut half the tree off to fit it in the house and they can’t find the saw. Then they can’t turn the stupid screws in the tree stand, the tree won’t stand straight, and the needles end up everywhere.
Bah humbug!!
jeffreyw
@Jay: Beer pairs well with this classic cookie.
Jager
My old man was a North Dakota farm boy, his Christmas classic story is set in 1926. Dad was 6 years old when the little family set off to spend Christmas in Iowa with gramps family in a brand new 1926 Model T. The car had to be pulled by a team of horses up to the gravel county road through 2 feet of fresh snow. The Model T had no heater, dad and grandma were wrapped in quilts and blankets while grandpa scraped the inside of the windshield for 675 miles each way. 2 lane roads at an average speed of around 20 mph. Their first and last Christmas trip to Iowa
WaterGirl
@debbie: Bad mom! :-)
My mom almost never baked, at least not until we were all grown up and out of the house. We always felt deprived because dessert wasn’t really a thing at our house, which I’m sure is why we love our sweets now!
We also felt deprived because our mom worked, when no one else’s mom worked. But my parents owned a neighborhood tavern, so of course she had to work, and she did laundry in the back room of the tavern every Monday.
Steeplejack (phone)
@WaterGirl:
Could be.
chris
@MomSense:
Same here in NS. Glad it’s not snow but jeez…
Sloane Ranger
@Steeplejack (phone): Probably suggesting something you’ve already thought of, but have you checked your phone line?
I had something similar few years ago and it turned out to be an issue with the cable before it entered the house.
delk
The tree
MomSense
@chris:
And the wind is howling. I thought of going to look at the waves but the flooding is bad on the coast.
Sloane Ranger
Just finished decorating the tree. Artificial but it looks good, even undecorated.
When I was clearing out my brother’s house after he passed away last year I found the tree ornaments our parents used when we were children so I’ve hung several of my favourites on my own tree this year.
It looks very festive but, if previous years are any guide, I’ll be fiddling with it all the way up to Christmas Day.
Miss Bianca
@delk: I like the sock monkeys at the foot of the tree – very festive touch!
Ruckus
@jeffreyw:
Never too soon.
However……
When it gets to be almost too late,
Bah Fucking! Humbug!
Kathleen
@debbie: Great idea
I love Graeters.
delk
@Miss Bianca: my husband broke the bowl the day before so I made a little amphitheater for them with it. ?
raven
For some reason the boss lady said no tree this year.
Ruckus
@Steeplejack (phone):
On the upside, they are now cheaper! And faster!
Villago Delenda Est
(picture of a not very happy cat wearing a reindeer hat)
Don we now our gay apparel
Fa la la la, la la la la
Put yourself in mortal peril
Fa la la la, la la la la
Ruckus
@PST:
She had all that time to develop the eye for what looks great, without making any mistakes or doing the work. Planning. Now she gets to put all that into motion.
FlyingToaster
I don’t have to bake until Xmas Eve, when me-n-WarriorGirl make the “Big Momma”* batch of Gingerbread. Right now I’m just trying to get through the last week of school before break.
* From the Jamie Lee Curtis book: “My Mommy Hung the Moon”
Kathleen
@debbie: Me too. I thought they were just an Ohio-Northern Kentucky thing. I had not seen them on any of the other states I’ve lived in.
Steeplejack (phone)
@Sloane Ranger:
I don’t think it’s that, but I texted my neighbor* to see if her Internet is out. Haven’t heard back yet.
* Small apartment building.
Steeplejack (phone)
@Ruckus:
True. That’s the one constant of replacing electronics: it’s always an upgrade.
Ruckus
@Gin & Tonic:
There used to be, maybe still is, a gallery that had Chihuly blown glass on display that was great to see. I think it was summer Thursday evenings walk around town or something like that. Would go when in town.
trollhattan
@West of the Rockies:
The Victorian Christmas in Nevada City is quite nice, because it suits the town. Not like, say, some tony place in Orange County. Enjoy!
Suzanne
@JPL: THANKS!!
It looks like I’m going to be commuting between Phoenix and Cleveland/Pittsburgh for a little while until the end of the school year. Can any Juicers do any meetups? Mr. Suzanne and I will need help learning the local haunts and meeting people.
Jay
Amir Khalid
These jackaltariat Christmas stories are just wonderful.
Meanwhile it’s been a fantastic Premier League Saturday for me, because Liverpool’s lead over the rest has been increased from eight points to ten. Liverpool won their match against Watford 2-0 to bring their points tally to 49, while second-placed Leicester City could only draw 1-1 at home to second from last Norwich City. Liverpool now look like leading the table come New Year’s Day, and would have to lose four more matches than Leicester over the rest of the season to surrender that lead.
Ruckus
@PST:
a furry dispenser
A great description! Never thought a cat’s butt was anything else……
chris
@MomSense: Yeah, wind gusting around 40mph. I love waiting for the power to go out :-( Wunderground says the rain will continue until the wee hours tomorrow and then all the puddles will freeze by Monday. Climate hoax doing its thing.
rikyrah
@MattF:
wasn’t a bad article. Made a lot of sense.
MomSense
@Suzanne:
My son’s former roommates moved to Pittsburgh in September.He works in one of the theaters and I’m not sure what she is doing, but they are really nice and seem to be doing lots of cool things based on their Instagram. They moved into a sort of mixed use warehouse / residential area that has a lot of parks and cool shops and restaurants. Their dog seems very happy with their new place.
Miss Bianca
Posted in previous thread by mistake, this one seems more appropriate:
OK, bakers – this recipe for Normandy rye-cider bread calls for a mixer with a dough hook. I do not have such a fancy-ass contraption on hand. Do I need one, or will hand-kneading do?
(note: I am not the bread baker in this household – this will be my first attempt in many moons – D fancies a non-knead, slow-rise method that takes no hands on at all)
ETA: the link doesn’t seem to want to link. : (
Here it is nekkid:
nationalpost.com/life/food/cook-this-normandy-apple-cider-rye-bread-fragrant-sweet-and-spicy
Ruckus
We lived in a house with a domed celling in the living room for the last half of my childhood. Something like 10ft tall at the peak, it held grand trees, and outside the front window was a huge pine of some sort, about 2 foot trunk. Very festive for xmas. A tree that tall was also wide enough to just about fill the big window at the front of the room, and which was very difficult to get through the front door. Not hard to bring home though as we always had a pick up for dad’s business. Rotated holidays at our house or one of my two aunts, with all the cousins there would be up to 16 people in someone’s house. The moms all worried that it would be OK, all were great cooks so it always was.
Cheryl Rofer
@Miss Bianca: You can knead it by hand. I have a dough hook and never use it.
Duane
A gathering of drunken aunties and no penis fish cookies? Here’s a chance for a new Christmas tradition. If anyone objects tell them they’re candles that came out wrong.
chopper
@Jay:
insert gif of homer simpson crying as he eats his pet lobster.
Martin
Criminology major daughter is making crime scene gingerbread men this year.
Jay
Barbara
@Miss Bianca: I made this recipe. It was the subject of a cooking thread a few weeks ago. You can knead it by hand, but it might help to make it a family activity in which multiple people take turns because the dough is very stiff. The recipe calls for using the dough hook for 20 minutes! Maybe a kind neighbor will lend you theirs?
debbie
@Kathleen:
It’s as close as I can get to my most favorite, no longer available flavor, Baskins Robbins’ peppermint fudge ribbon. ?
Jay
Man U’s next forward?
narya
@Jay: It works surprisingly well! Here’s the list:
Sweater Party: Ginger molasses cookies, w/ rye flour
Sierra Nevada Celebration: Orange wheat crisps
Sam Smith Winter: Malted barley & dates, w/ date cream cheese frosting
St. Bernardus: Spent grain, malted barley syrup, barley flour sandwich cookies; chocolate ganache filling
Great Lakes Christmas: barley syrup, ginger syrup, mixed fruits
Victory Winter Cheers: Lemon, ginger, oats
Cherry stout: chocolate cookies w/ cherries
Cider: apple cookies (made w/ boiled cider)
Brown Shugga: Maple cranberry
debbie
@Ruckus:
The Franklin Park Conservatory has permanent installations of Chilulys tucked in amongst the plants.
Gin & Tonic
@Ruckus: Haven’t been to Columbus in years, since my daughter finished her MA at THE Ohio State University. I don’t see any need to return.
Jay
Gin & Tonic
@narya: Mmm, make my own boiled cider every year. A very underrated sweetener.
The one year the pot slipped as I was taking it off wasn’t fun, though.
debbie
@Jay:
With little variation, this can be said about every fucking deal he’s made as president.
Jay C
@MomSense:
That’s why they have lights on them…..
StringOnAStick
Cross stitch? Here’s a good one: https://mockpaperscissors.com/2019/12/07/bad-crafts-cont/
We’ll stick with the ceramic tiny Christmas tree since our now 2 yo old kitties are a bit curious about new things. One of them is a chronic chewer, to the point that all clothes must be kept in closed closets and a large flat sheet is our bedspread now so we can tuck in every edge during the day (after she ate the edge of a cotton blanket and of a sheet as well). She’s our little Marie Kondo enforcer.
We took them both for their very delayed (due to me knee replacements) annual exam last week, mainly because the “Adventure Eater” had some not so firm “deposits” in the cat box. No parasites were detected so the vet recommended a pro level probiotic; the results were, ah, “explosive” and are only now sort of getting back to normal (holy crap, what a mess). The vet then recommended we go with much smaller doses until things get better, but that will have to wait until we return from our holiday trip because I don’t want our cat sitter to fire us. We did figure out how to mostly shave a cat’s ass though in case John Cole wants a tutorial! Pro tip: two people, one of which knows how to scruff properly, and good quality sewing scissors that can get through that fine long fur effectively. Argh…
WaterGirl
@Martin: This comment was in the trash, for no apparent reason. Had you asked someone to trash it?
John Revolta
We had cousins who used to save the tinsel every year but since it only cost about a quarter for a package we didn’t bother. This was the old style tinsel, none of your plastic stuff, this was made out of LEAD foil, so when you took it off the tree you could crush down a whole tree’s worth of tinsel into a little ball that weighed about 2 or 3 pounds. Then you could put it in the palm of your hand and PUNCH your brother in the arm! Good times.
PST
It was a fresh start for me too since I had lost custody of all my first marriage ornaments (although I got the ribbon-eating cat). I was astonished by the cost of the ornaments and made the mistake of expressing it, so every year I am reminded of how reasonable it all was when amortized over their useful life. My favorite part of her story about the buying expedition was seeing a tree skirt she thought was perfect at Marshall Field’s (as we will always call it) under a display tree. When the clerk said that they were out of those, she said, “No you’re not. I see one right there under that tree.” So the clerk got on her hands and knees and the lady got what she wanted.
WaterGirl
@Steeplejack (phone): I always buy my own cable modem. They never bother to upgrade your modem so they make a bundle off of monthly charges for old equipment that should long ago have been retired.
Jay
@StringOnAStick:
the Vet didn’t recommend a fabric softener?
debbie
OT but fun: Has this been shared yet?
WaterGirl
@Suzanne: You got the job!!!!!
WaterGirl
@debbie: That was awesome!
Jay
God, I hope this is true,
mrmoshpotato
@Baud: YES! ?
WereBear
@Jay: from the looks of him everyone he encounters would want to kick him in the nuts.
WaterGirl
I haven’t decorated my tree yet, but I did pick up poop and then put down grass seed and fenced off both ends of the yard from my pups. They do this racing loop around the house from one fence to another, so for the winter they basically get the back but not the sides, in the hopes that grass will actually grow in the spring.
That’s my technique – put down grass seed right before the first big snow, and then in the spring you get lovely grass without having to water it every 45 minutes after you have seeded. Crossing my fingers.
Laura Too
Travels with Merlin
It started out a bit rocky. My car died on my way home from work Tuesday night and I was too nervous to attempt to pick Merlin up at the vet. I figured no big deal, bestie could take me. Nope, she was busy. What to do? Schlamazel’s wife lives in that neighborhood so I sent her a message. Back and forth for a bit but she was on board with the scheme. An instant sense of peace came over me, which is very unusual when it comes to travel. I’m usually a wreck. I slept well & caught the train to the airport and waited for my Aunt to arrive. All good, waited in special services with the special guy and got our boarding passes. Now for TSA. Everyone said don’t open the kennel and that was what the agent was insisting I do. Nope, I dug in, there has to be another way. He reluctantly said a hand search and called the supervisor. Very nice supervisor and agent took me to a private room, letting me know I made a good call. Last week they spent 2 ½ hours searching for a cat whose owner said he’d be fine out of his kennel. Yeah, not so much! So on we went to the small room where they asked me to take him out so they could put the kennel through x-ray. I didn’t want to admit I had no idea how he would behave because I was worried they would deny boarding if he wasn’t mine. So I opened the door and peered in. Come on dude, out you go. He wasn’t having it so I had to tip him out. He hid in a corner and didn’t try to run but I wasn’t sure how putting him back in would go-visions of my arms being shredded. He was a perfect gentleman returning to his safe space. We continued towards the gate and as I’m walking I got the giggles thinking of John Cole’s trips to the vet and praying I didn’t get THAT smell! I needed breakfast so we stopped at a juice bar and I thought karma had come to bite me as I thought I heard the tell tales signs of a cat winding up to vomit but got lucky. It was only the bass on a really bad country song. Whew! We did pre-boarding and of course I put him in wrong but that’s okay I was also in the wrong seat. So we move again and this time with help the kennel is safely under the seat in front of me. (Why would you put velcro on the bottom of a kennel???) Two hours passed and he was a perfect sweetheart. We got off at Reagan international and the hunt for Steeplejack began. I of course chose the wrong side of the terminal but I was standing in glorious sunshine so I was good with it. Steep? Not so much. I stressed my highway angel out a bit but we finally connected. It was determined that I didn’t have enough time to get Merlin to Tomato Queen and make my return from Dulles airport so I got a wonderful animated tour of DC from one airport to another and the most awesome Steeplejack got to delver Merlin to his forever home. I found a great pizza place, had a beer and a 15 minute massage and was home by 7:00. I want to thank Red Dirt Girl for being such a kind souls as to care for this kitty, Tomato Queen for opening heart and home, Steeplejack for the kindness of an amazing taxi service , Anne Laurie the amazing pet saver, John Cole for being John Cole and everyone who contributed to making this a success! It is supposed to be -5 tonight and we can all sleep well knowing the beautiful black cat is safe and warm.
trollhattan
@Jay:
He did a little happy dance. Goooooooooooal!
chris
@Laura Too: Good on you! And Merlin too.
Betty Cracker
@debbie: We had neighbors from Ohio years ago who made buckeyes at Christmas, and my sister and I looked forward to it every year. So, when we established our own Christmas cookie thing, we made buckeyes a part of it.
Dorothy A. Winsor
Ted Lieu apparently had stent surgery, which I wound up having too. Stents are a miracle of modern medicine.
J R in WV
Our last Xmas tree was many years ago, we have donated all the classic ornaments to next door neighbor who does annual Solstice dinner, including class icicles etc.
But that last tree was stupendous, 10 or 11 feet high, I had to guy wire it to the wall up high. Then we put the lights on it, nothing else, and invited a ton of people for a Xmas party, IIRC the Saturday before actual Xmas, and everyone helped decorate it. It was beautiful, and everyone had a ball. Then we retired from trees and decorations…
Mostly retired from presents, tho we get something nice for all the neighbors, bottle of something, kitchen tool, etc. Still drive around to see the decorations sometimes, though.
Factoid, those evangelicals who fuss about people using Xmas, they’re showing their ignorance, in early Christian Greece and Rome the “X” always stood for Christ. So Xmas is the original name for the holiday, and they’re too ignorant to even know that.
Suzanne
@WaterGirl: Actually, I got two offers. I am very excited about the one in Pittsburgh and am very meh about the one in Philly, even though it is more money. I am very excited to relocate, but I am definitely feeling how much I will miss the friends, neighbors, and colleagues I have here. But it’s the right thing. You know? Happy to go and sad to leave.
mrmoshpotato
@J R in WV: Ten-to-11-foot tree inside? You got 15-foot ceilings?
J R in WV
@Suzanne:
Congrats on two offers, always a boost for one’s self regard! The “more money” offer in Philly is misleading, after costs I bet the P’burgh offer will be more cash in hand.
Lots of history in Philly, but not as friendly as Pittsburgh.
mrmoshpotato
@Martin: We’ll need evidence….eerrr pictures.
I can see myself out. (But I’m serious about pictures.)
J R in WV
@mrmoshpotato:
Nearly so at the top, it’s a barrel shaped ceiling/roof in a combo living room / kitchen great room. Also tipped, The west side is nearly 4 feet higher than the east side.
raven
Fucking asshole is doing the coin flip at the Army-Navy game with his fucking MAGA hat on.
Jay
Jay
Still, FTFNYT, this makes up for nothing,
Stopped clock and all that,….
Jim, Foolish Literalist
this strikes me as not just a dick move, but a stupid one, but what the fuck do I know?
frosty
@Suzanne: Congratulations on the offers! My son lives in PGH, he’s hosting Christmas this year. It’s a great place, not as overwhelming as Philly.
Betty Cracker
@raven: Oh, they thought they found a public sporting event activity he couldn’t possibly fuck up — it’s not like you have to actually catch the coin. Figures the asshole would wear campaign swag.
I was an involuntary spectator at the town Christmas parade this morning. Had to run to the hardware store, and part of the parade passed by while I was there. Some assholes had a Trump float. I booed, and several others joined in! We got lots of dirty looks though. Fuck ’em!
My guess is there wasn’t an Obama float in the town parade 2009-2016. One thing I hate about the Trumpers (one of MANY, MANY things!) is their insistence on shoving their golden calf down our throats. Gah!
Duane
@Jay: Unless there’s a state death certificate involved, no one should be purged from the voter rolls. It’s a load of horse shit, and Wisconsin isn’t the only state doing it.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@raven:
Jay
@Jim, Foolish Literalist
Blue Dog, 100% NRA Endorsement, ususal suspect,
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeff_Van_Drew
He needs a good primary, he’s up for reelection in 2020.
WaterGirl
@Suzanne:
Oh yes, we know all about that!
As long as they are both enough money, the good thing is that it doesn’t have to be about the pay. Many things are more important than money, as long as you have enough. When do you have to let them know? Have you already pretty much decided?
JPL
@raven: Imagine if you will another president who skipped out of Nam, wearing a political hat to the game. What a f.king asshole.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Jay
@Duane
Just enough to rob both Stacy and Georgia.
At what point in time does it no longer qualify as a Democracy?
raven
@JPL: And I guarantee there were strict orders about behavior.
Jay
“Tojo and Roosevelt fight over common ground”
“Botha and Mandela continue to offer differing futures for South Africa”.
ThresherK
@raven: Did earlier, classier, CinC’s do the coin flip for the Army-Navy Game?
Trump is a fart in a non-descript restroom: You don’t really remember much otherwise, but you know he makes it worse simply by being there.
raven
@ThresherK: Yes, they showed a pic of Ford in 74.
Duane
@Jay: The only voter fraud happening is done by Republican controlled states. People should go to jail for stealing votes. Another institutional failure.
Kathleen
@debbie: I didn’t know Baskin Robbins was still around. I haven’t seen it in any stores in Cincinnati and there are no shops here anymore. I’ll have to try that peppermint thing from Graeters. I indulged myself with a purchase of Ghirardelli peppermint bark squares. I had coupon for $1 off and Kroger had it on sale. To die for.
prostratedragon
@Baud: Ah, an old favorite from I think 2015.
Kathleen
@Suzanne: Congratulaltions!
raven
The best thing about the game (besides the game which I like) is that USAA sponsors it and there are tons of vets having strokes because USAA sponsors NFL games too.
Ruckus
@Betty Cracker:
That’s a gold spray painted calf. He doesn’t have the money for real gold.
raven
@Kathleen: They are in Dunkin Donuts.
debbie
@Kathleen:
They are still around, mostly in the northern suburbs here, but they have been dead to me since they dropped peppermint fudge ribbon. ?
JPL
@raven: When we moved to Dallas decades ago, we looked at a house that Staubach owned early in his career. It was lovely but not as close in as I preferred. My ex had no idea who he was.
Immanentize
@raven: Ford was a real deal Navy man.
Butter Emails
@Jay:
Media and Republicans divided over execution of fake news “reporters”.
Immanentize
@raven: My Dad used to attend the Army/Navy game every year he could in Philly. Then he and my Mom would go to Bookbinder’s restaurant.
As for USAA, I just got my 54 dollar insurance member dividend! Woot! I love USAA.
Ruckus
@debbie:
There are a few Baskin and Robbins around here in socal. One about 1 1/2 mile from me.
Immanentize
@Suzanne: Congrats! Both cities are great, but I rather prefer Pittsburg. More eastern european working class folks like where I grew up. It’s a bit ugly, but it has really got some great things happening — especially in tech — these days. Also a good foodie town (and old school Italian, yum!) Both, however, are in the Pennsylvania legal system which sucks.
JPL
@Immanentize: Crap.. I only got 34.00. A decade or two ago, they gave out large dividends but with global warming it probably won’t happen again.
Immanentize
@JPL: That probably just means you pay less every month for your insurance than me.
raven
@Immanentize: I got $84.50!
I was at a conference in Augusta and got to talking to a guy at the bar while watching hoops. It turned our he was the commanding general of the 1st Signal Corps headquartered at Ft Gordon (he was in civvies). When I mentioned General Tom Reinzi, Commander of the 1st Sig when I was in Vietnam he couldn’t believe I had met him. He really went off when I showed him pics of the General that I have. He told me about an Army-Navy game when Reinzi stripped down to a bare chest and was waving his blues over his head!
He actually met the plane when the company hit country and shook every hand as we deplaned.
JPL
@Immanentize: Yup. The big payout was when we had sons and a more expensive house on the policies. Who knew. I do love USAA though.
Immanentize
@raven: Well good on him! I guess Reinzi understood the duality of man.
Immanentize
@JPL: Ahh, something to look forward to when the Immp finally gets his license. At least he will be in Texas and can call USAA as a local charge.
ETA. Isnt it odd that probably no one under 30 has any clue what that second sentence above means….
Jim, Foolish Literalist
It’s hard to look and see it as anything else– three pictures, one looks like it’s being deliberately done over/behind the head of a black cade
ETA: I didn’t know about this.
Kathleen
@raven: Thanks! I very rarely go to Dunkin. My daughter’s job in high school and college was at Baskin Robbins in downtown Cinci. She got to meet a few baseball players (including Jim Kaat, whom I bet most folks here wouldn’t know. He was my favorite Twin when I lived in Minnesota in the 60’s).
Immanentize
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: what?
Kathleen
@debbie: I’m Irish and Scorpio rising so I know all about “being dead to me”!
debbie
@Immanentize:
@JPL:
I thought USAA was just for veterans???
opiejeanne
@Just One More Canuck:
My friends and I referred to that as Glitterfarts. Dangerous stuff for silly kitties.
Duane
@raven: Without any passing the game takes less time, but for all THE USAA commercials.
Immanentize
@debbie: It used to be just for officers and their families. Now includes enlisted NCOs and families. Also too, employees — my wife worked there in San Antonio. Always said it was a great place to work.
West of the Rockies
@trollhattan:
We’re steering clear of the downtown for a while. 200 Harleys doing a toy run. I can’t stand the overwhelming roar of those things and I think the pup might freak out. But, yes, Victoriana works well here!
West of the Rockies
@Martin:
When I was in CSI school in ’95, we had mock scenes in a decommissioned army barracks. Each room had a new homicide. It was cool and creepy. I did that work for 10 years before teaching English for another 14. I don’t miss it (teaching or evidence collection). I found CSI work to be mostly sad, smelly and disturbing. For those who are drawn to it, it can be rewarding and engaging.
JPL
@debbie: My father was a retired officer and at that time it opened up to children of officers. I have been a proud member longer than I want to admit
raven
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: It’s been a thing for a long time.
raven
@Immanentize: I think California somehow made them stop being so restrictive. I’ve been on it for almost 50 years because my old man was a mustang.
Ryan
What, no booze?
mrmoshpotato
@Ryan: You were expecting tales of a still running in the backyard? :)
debbie
@Immanentize:
@JPL:
Thanks. I’ve never heard anyone bad mouth them.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
I think “Can you imagine if Obama…” is a mostly pointless game because Obama wouldn’t say or do anything in the universe of the kind of shit trump does and says, you can imagine if Obama said anything snarky, or even less that worshipful, in these circumstances, they’d feed on it forever. A cousin of mine– who for context ain’t right in the head– brought up “57 states” a few months ago.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
This hollowed-out little mother-fucker. I hope it blows up in their faces. Maybe Harris can revive her campaign
Jay
@Immanentize:
the Nazis amongst other symbols have coopted the “ok” hand gesture, precisely because it is ambiguous.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/OK_gesture
And it doesn’t look like the cadets are playing the circle game, as the gesture is not being made below the waist on the gesturer’s own body,
nor is the gesture being made within the sightlines of another Cadet, as “the game” requires.
instead it’s deployed on the upper shoulder of an incamera cadet, after the camera focus’s in on the Cadet, by an anonymous Cadet standing behind him.
germy
Steeplejack (phone)
@Immanentize:
I got about $29, but I have only car insurance and I’m a low-mileage geezer.
Steeplejack (phone)
@raven:
Cool.
debbie
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
I saw somewhere on Twitter that Lindsey’s only 2 points ahead of the Dem candidate. Good news!
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@debbie:
all the retired officers– McRaven, Hayden, Hertling, who claim to be upset about trump could make some noise by traveling to SC to endorse Jaime Harrison. Maybe not a game changer, but it would sure make Lindsey uncomfortable
Kayla Rudbek
@debbie: active-duty, veterans, and children and grandchildren.
David ??Booooooo?? Koch
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: he’s not chairman anymore (gave it back to Grassley), so it’s a hollow kabuki invite.
mrmoshpotato