Trump Crime Cartel Open Thread: J-Kush, Real Estate Developer, Will SOLVE the Middle Eastern Puzzle

… and without Israel (i.e., Netahyahu) having to lift a finger, or give up an inch!

This is a middle-schooler’s game of Risk — or, more likely, one of those notorious NYC developer deals where Company A swaps two parking lots and the air rights over Parcel B to the city in return for a frontage easement on Parcel C that will allow Company D to build out, on the understanding that Company D will then invest a few mill in Company A’s overleveraged Rental Tower F. Of course Kushner has no idea what’s at risk here, and if he did, he’d assume it was somebody else’s problem to clean up after him.

For her new book Kushner Inc., journalist Vicky Ward interviewed some 220 people to better understand the roles of Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump within the tumultuous White House. Ward found that the power couple is quite power hungry, demanding to travel free on the State Department’s dime and skirting around the “no’s” of former Secretary of State Rex Tillerson…

The White House envoy to the Middle East, Jason Greenblatt, has denied the book’s details of the Middle East plan. Whether or not the final product looks like the draft described to Vicky Ward, Kushner’s peace proposal is expected sometime after Israel’s election scheduled on April 9. Last month, Trump’s senior advisor described his plan — in a typically vague statement — as “really about establishing borders and resolving final-status issues … The plan will have a broad economic impact, not only on Israel and the Palestinians, but on the entire region as well.”

From the extract at Amazon, Vicky Ward’s new Kushner, Inc: Greed.Ambition. Corruption.… does not look like a gripping read. But the details put out so far are, if nothing else, illuminating.






122 replies
  1. 1
    burnspbesq says:

    Go Belmont! Stew the Turtle!

  2. 2
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    Jar Jar Kush & Ivanka of Botox-Gone-Berserk infamy.

    Order all the orange jumpsuits, Dyslexa!

  3. 3
    rikyrah says:

    I want both of them in silver handcuffs

  4. 4
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @burnspbesq: Fuck off & die, esquatter.

  5. 5
    hells littlest angel says:

    Saudi Arabia should hold out for Baltic, Mediterranean, and the Short Line Railroad.

  6. 6
    rikyrah says:

    EXCELLENT!

    LOL

    Bill & Ted 3 confirmed by Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter

    Stars of the popular comedy make announcement on Youtube that Bill & Ted Face the Music is going into production this summer

    The long-mooted third Bill and Ted movie is set to go into production this year with a projected release date of summer 2020, it has been announced.

    Actors Alex Winter and Keanu Reeves – aka William “Bill” S Preston Esq and Theodore “Ted” Logan – broke the news in a short promotional video filmed at the Hollywood Bowl. Thanking “you the fans”, the pair said the title of the new film would be Bill & Ted Face the Music, and would “hopefully” shoot in the summer.

  7. 7
    raven says:

    @burnspbesq: The Braves are giving Sparty a run and Izzo may fall out!

  8. 8
    raven says:

    @rikyrah: The preacher who buried my brother-in-law is Keanu’s stunt double!

  9. 9
    Mary G says:

    Why do I think that Jordan’s not on board with giving part of their country away?

  10. 10

    So what the hell does Egypt get out of giving up islands to Saudi Arabia?

    This “solution” does not seem to address other issues such as reparations, the necessity of nation-building for a new Palestine, and the likelihood of requiring UN security forces patrolling borders for 10-20 years to ensure a peace can form between hostile nations.

  11. 11

    @rikyrah:

    Silver can burn a vampire’s skin.

  12. 12

    @Mary G:

    It might involve shutting down and relocating unwanted trump towers.

  13. 13
    Eric S. says:

    @hells littlest angel: Thank you for a good laugh after reading the post below.

  14. 14
    Hoodie says:

    The last episode of westerners drawing national boundaries in the ME went so well . . .

  15. 15
    Brickley Paiste says:

    @PaulWartenberg:
    I’m sure either Jared or someone in his brain trust has mouthed the words: “That just a question of implementation, lets focus on big picture here.”

  16. 16
    dmsilev says:

    That’s a remarkably stupid plan, even by Trump administration/family standards. Let’s start with the obvious questions, what happens to all of the Palestinians who don’t want to relocate to New Palestine (nee Jordan) and similarly where do all of the Jordanians who have no interest in becoming New Palestinians go? And who pays for all of the relocations? And what about all of the real estate?

  17. 17
    dmsilev says:

    @Brickley Paiste:

    I’m sure either Jared or someone in his brain trust has mouthed the words: “That just a question of implementation, lets focus on big picture here.”

    “When the organizers of FyreFestival turned to international relations…”

  18. 18
    Aleta says:

    And Egypt said: Sure Jared, glad to help out any way we can.

  19. 19
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    Every last one of these criminal shits needs to be in prison forever.

  20. 20
    Brickley Paiste says:

    @dmsilev:

    Yes, I assume Jared’s plan promises gourmet meals, too. Maybe Kanye will do a free concert on the Mount of Olives or at the Western Wall in celebration of the accord. (You know that Trump extracted some promise for that pardon or commutation or whatever it was.)

  21. 21
    Betty Cracker says:

    I’m generally opposed to violent uprisings that result in the guillotining of noodle-armed, whey-faced scions of ruling class crime families. But darned if this administration isn’t making me rethink all that. Might have to take up knitting.

  22. 22
    WaterGirl says:

    @PaulWartenberg: Then silver is a most excellent choice!

  23. 23
    Marcopolo says:

    @raven: Yeah, well the Winters lived down the street from me in the 70’s in St Louis. I took modern dance from the mom (it did not take), knew both Alex & his older brother Steven. I guess that puts me a 1 degree from Keanu. Woohoo!

    And I saw tha author of the book in Steph Ruhle’s show yesterday. Considering how much damning stuff is out there about Kushner it was a pretty bland interview.

  24. 24
    Hoodie says:

    @Villago Delenda Est: They should be forced to live in Gaza, prison is too kind.

  25. 25
    burnspbesq says:

    @Uncle Cosmo:

    Nobody in the ACC misses you. Enjoy playing Nebraska and Rutgers for all eternity.

  26. 26
    Aleta says:

    (WSJ) The House Judiciary Committee is eyeing additional document requests to associates of President Trump, including Trump lawyer Rudy Giuliani and a former lawyer for Michael Cohen who last year sought a pardon on his client’s behalf, according to a person familiar with the committee’s plans.

    Other individuals likely to be sent requests include former Secretary of State Rex Tillerson and Gary Cohn, an investment banker who served as Mr. Trump’s top economic adviser until he stepped down one year ago.

    Coincidentally, Tillerson has three different mentions about himself as a Boy Scout in three different stories today.

  27. 27
    raven says:

    @Marcopolo: I don’t know who Winters is? I only know Reeves from Little Buddha .

  28. 28
    WaterGirl says:

    @dmsilev: Did you ever read The Cat in the Hat Comes Back? I think that’s the name of the book where they get something pink on something important while the parents were gone, and they try to wash it out in the bathroom but that leaves a pink ring in the tub, and every single thing they try just leaves more pink in their wake until the their trail of pink is everywhere and the house is a total disaster.

    That’s what this plan reminds me of.

  29. 29
    raven says:

    @burnspbesq: And the Frighting Illini!

  30. 30
    burnspbesq says:

    @Hoodie:

    They should be forced to live in Gaza, prison is too kind

    Haven’t the people of Gaza suffered enough?

  31. 31
    WaterGirl says:

    @Betty Cracker: Um, maybe the knitting needles aren’t the best idea?

  32. 32
    WaterGirl says:

    @burnspbesq: I assume this is just trash talk related to sports and you guys don’t really hate each other?

  33. 33
    chopper says:

    Kushner’s plan: Jordan would give land to the Palestinian territories

    why the shitting fuck would jordan give their land up to israeli occupation?

  34. 34
    burnspbesq says:

    @WaterGirl:

    The first part is correct. The second part doesn’t necessarily follow.

  35. 35
    ruemara says:

    @raven: Is he single?

    Re, subject:
    I’m tired of hearing about this crime family. Nothing will happen to them for their treason or corruption. NOTHING. This will be the shame of the world.

  36. 36
    MattF says:

    I guess Satan got the property at 666 Fifth Ave. But, then… what did Kushner get from Satan? Wait, wait, don’t tell me…

  37. 37
    Bill Arnold says:

    @Aleta:

    Coincidentally, Tillerson has three different mentions about himself as a Boy Scout in three different stories today.

    Who spotted this and more important how? Seems pretty useful.

  38. 38
    raven says:

    @ruemara: Huh, I don’t know. He played QB at Clemson when Hatfield was there making him in his 50’s at least. His name is Christopher Robin!

  39. 39
    chopper says:

    @hells littlest angel:

    “you sank my battleship!”

  40. 40
    A Ghost To Most says:

    @WaterGirl:
    Some people are not impressed by an Esq. (or PhD) after a name. It smacks of pretension.

  41. 41
    WaterGirl says:

    @burnspbesq: duly noted.

  42. 42
    chopper says:

    @A Ghost To Most:

    go fuck yourself.

    signed,
    chopper, phD, DDS, OBE

  43. 43
    WaterGirl says:

    @A Ghost To Most: You may call me Dr. WaterGirl, if you like. :-)

  44. 44
    PJ says:

    @PaulWartenberg: This “solution” doesn’t address anything the stakeholders want, except, of course, Israel, which wants the Palestinians out of the territory it controls.

    At this point, in the real world, I don’t see how a two state solution could work, given Israel’s decision to permanently settle the occupied territories. It’s either going to be one non-Jewish, multinational state, or apartheid. We know which alternative Likud wants, and which Republicans would support. Whether a Democratic administration would also support apartheid is an open question, but I think as time goes on, and younger voters have more power, the less tenable it will be.

  45. 45
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @chopper: Chopper, Chopper, Chopper of the BDA
    Chopper of the BD, Chopper of the BD, BD BDA!
    It’s a man’s life in the British Dental Association!

  46. 46
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @burnspbesq: Not my doing. No idea WTF they were thinking when they moved to the Big 10. Oh wait, you’re a Puke, aren’t you? Even after you fuck off & die, I’d resurrect you so you could fuck off & die again…

  47. 47
    A Ghost To Most says:

    @chopper: @

    I love you too.

  48. 48
    WaterGirl says:

    Apropos of nothing, I was pleased to see this:

    Pete Buttigieg
    Verified account
    @PeteButtigieg
    5h5 hours ago

    Climate change isn’t just happening in the Arctic. It’s happening in the Midwest. It’s killing people. So let’s call it what it is: a major security issue.

    edit: *just to be clear, I am not pleased to see that people are dying from the floods in the midwest.

  49. 49
    A Ghost To Most says:

    @Uncle Cosmo:
    Oh, you’re talking basketball.
    Nevermind. Stanley Cup to prepare for.

  50. 50
    germy says:

    Today, we remember the time Obama wore a bike helmet, the worst scandal in presidential history. pic.twitter.com/RZMqFm8aWl— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) March 21, 2019

  51. 51
    WaterGirl says:

    Twitter question: Is the “You may also like” list on a person’s twitter generated automatically or do you have a choice about who shows up in their list?

  52. 52
    Marcopolo says:

    @raven: @raven: FYI Alex Winter is the Bill part of the Bill & Ted’s movies. Now feel free to forget that as it isn’t particularly meaningful & we only have so many neurons to store info.

  53. 53
    WaterGirl says:

    @germy: What about the tan suit? Surely that was worse than the bike helmet? Or elitist mustard on a sandwich? Oh my god, who can forget the shoes on the desk? And didn’t he order the wrong drink once? So many scandals – it’s hard to keep track!

  54. 54
    piratedan says:

    @WaterGirl: i believe it’s algorithm based, so be careful who you hate follow

  55. 55
    WaterGirl says:

    @piratedan: Thanks. I don’t actually have a twitter account, but I do keep 4 twitter tabs open in my browser: Adam Schiff, John Cole, Preet Bharara, and Pete Buttigieg.

    Everybody but Preet has a “You may also like” list. And John’s has ABL, so I got to wondering.

  56. 56
    Marcopolo says:

    As for the NCAA March madness thing that is going on atm, rooting for St Louis U to make it to the second round. They play VA Tech in the final first round game late tomorrow and are the underdogs by quite a margin. And other than always rooting for the underdog to win every matchup I have no other horses in the race.

  57. 57
    West of the Rockies says:

    @PaulWartenberg:

    Egypt gets a third round conditional draft choice and 30K in cash.

  58. 58

    @WaterGirl: The TAN SUIT was a crime against humanity, worse than Jimmy Carter(happy b-day to 39).

  59. 59
  60. 60
    West of the Rockies says:

    It sounds sort of akin to the plot of They Shoot Horses Don’t They, wherein the marathon dance contest is all a big scam–no winners, only exhausted, depleted losers falling to the floor, and the organizer makes off with the money.

  61. 61
    Miss Bianca says:

    @raven:

    The preacher who buried my brother-in-law is Keanu’s stunt double!

    Now *that*, by God, is today’s principal contender for the “You don’t hear *that* shit every day” award!

  62. 62
    Kent says:

    @PJ:

    At this point, in the real world, I don’t see how a two state solution could work, given Israel’s decision to permanently settle the occupied territories. It’s either going to be one non-Jewish, multinational state, or apartheid. We know which alternative Likud wants, and which Republicans would support. Whether a Democratic administration would also support apartheid is an open question, but I think as time goes on, and younger voters have more power, the less tenable it will be.

    The obvious 2-state solution would be the: (1) Israel, a Jewish-majority state with a Palestinian minority as it is today, and (2) Palestine, a majority Palestinian state with a Jewish minority as it is today.

    All those Jewish settlers want to continue living in the West Bank? Fine, let them stay. But they will be within a majority Palestinian state and can trade in their Israeli passports for Palestinian passports. They can defend all their land claims in Palestian courts. Send their kids to Palestinian schools, etc. etc. There would be plenty of international and UN observers and administrators to make sure it is all fair and equitable. Every country in the middle east has had a prosperous and industrious Jewish minority population. The new Palestinian state could be exactly the same way.

    Yeah….never going to happen. But in theory there is absolutely no reason why we couldn’t have two multi-ethnic states living side by side. That happens everywhere else in the world. It’s the normal thing.

  63. 63
    raven says:

    @Marcopolo: I’m old and missed all that stuff.

  64. 64
    Immanentize says:

    Yeah, fellows, but what about the Lady Owls versus the Golden Eagles tomorrow?

  65. 65
    WaterGirl says:

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA: I liked the tan suit, but nobody ever asked me.

  66. 66
    Shana says:

    @raven: Is that a typo or intentional?

  67. 67
    Kent says:

    @WaterGirl:

    Apropos of nothing, I was pleased to see this:

    Pete Buttigieg
    Verified account
    @PeteButtigieg
    5h5 hours ago

    Climate change isn’t just happening in the Arctic. It’s happening in the Midwest. It’s killing people. So let’s call it what it is: a major security issue.

    edit: *just to be clear, I am not pleased to see that people are dying from the floods in the midwest.

    Nebraska’s absolute tool of a Senator Ben Sasse voted AGAINST disaster relief and food aid for Puerto Rico after Hurricane Maria: https://www.bustle.com/p/16-republicans-who-opposed-a-hurricane-disaster-relief-bill-in-the-senate-2979420

    We’ll see how he feels about disaster relief for Nebraska. These people have no fucking shame.

  68. 68
    WaterGirl says:

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA: I just read that today isn’t actually Carter’s birthday. It’s just that as of today, he has lived a day longer than Bush Sr when he croaked at 94 years 171 days. Carter is at 172.

    Seems kind of ghoulish for them to be talking about that, but again, nobody asked me.

  69. 69
  70. 70
    raven says:

    @Miss Bianca: Former double for Keanu Reeves does not believe in coincidence

    Nearly 14 years since that first phone call, Robbins’ stunt career continues to stretch the field. His stunt work is divided between films and narrative video games, including the 2004 film “Friday Night Lights” and his five-year stint with the action videogame series “Uncharted,” where he stunt-doubled for the animated protagonist Nathan Drake. His stunt work for videogame “Madden NFL” is 10 years and counting.

    This was 5 years ago. I’m obviously not religious but I really enjoyed talking to this dude.

  71. 71
    Leto says:

    @Betty Cracker: May I recommend Avalune for a teacher? Certified master knitter, multiple blue ribbon award winner, has a ton of teaching experience… plus you know she has the patience of a saint; she’s married to me after all :p

    @WaterGirl: Counter argument to that: you can take them onto planes. Apparently my finger nail clippers with that little spin around metal file is a “dangerous weapon”, yet her multitude of murder sticks are a-ok.

    @rikyrah: This makes me so happy 😀😀😀

  72. 72
    raven says:

    @Shana: Well, I’m a die-hard Illini but we are so bad in hoops and football that I’ve almost lost interest. It’s tough sledding when I’ve been a Georgia Bulldog for 35+ years too.

  73. 73
    mrmoshpotato says:

    @germy:

    Today, we remember the time Obama wore a bike helmet, the worst scandal in presidential history. pic.twitter.com/RZMqFm8aWl— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) March 21, 2019

    “WHILE WEARING A TAN SUIT AND EATING A BURGER WITH SPICY MUSTARD!” screamed Hannity.

  74. 74
    NobodySpecial says:

    @WaterGirl: Look, the man was telling people to inflate their tires to a proper level. Clearly history’s second worst monster.

  75. 75
    WaterGirl says:

    @Kent: Fuck Sasse. He is the new Flake. I wanted to smack Flake every time I saw his “concerned” face. I don’t know if I could pick Sasse out of a line-up at this point, so he’s at a lower risk of smacking, but I don’t loathe him any less.

  76. 76
    WaterGirl says:

    @Kent: Maybe we should all send Sasse rolls of paper towels.

  77. 77
    Marcopolo says:

    @raven: I’ve heard that Reeves doesn’t actually use a stunt double for the John Wick movies (here is the trailer for JW3 for anyone who likes this stuff) though I wonder if that is actually true given the high possibility of injury doing stunts plotted against the value of the lead star being able to complete the shooting in a timely fashion. Also too, he is not getting any younger & bodies start to rebel against doing certain shit as they age–or at least mine has.

  78. 78
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    Seattle Mariners! Best record in baseball! Ichiro retires!

  79. 79
    mrmoshpotato says:

    Can we get rid of this mobbed-up, money-laundring, Soviet Shitpile crime family already?

    They do not bring me joy.

  80. 80
    Marcopolo says:

    @mrmoshpotato: And wearing mom jeans. Don’t forget the frigging mom jeans!

    FFS, how can anyone who did any kind of reporting on Obama and any of these kind of things look at themselves in the mirror? Or maybe they do but they just don’t see anything…just saying…

  81. 81
    WaterGirl says:

    @Leto: That makes no sense — as you obviously know — you could poke a person’s eye out with a knitting needle.

    (In truth, I was worried more worried about what they might do to Betty Cracker than any danger to those she might attack.)

  82. 82
    Miss Bianca says:

    @raven: Wow, he sounds like a really nice guy! The kind of preacher I’d feel like having a beer with!//

  83. 83
    Miss Bianca says:

    @WaterGirl:

    (In truth, I was worried more worried about what they might do to Betty Cracker than any danger to those she might attack.)

    Hey, this is Betty we’re talking about, not Cole!

  84. 84
    trollhattan says:

    @germy:
    Oh god, triggers memories of
    –GW Bush on mountain bike=manly, fun-loving, healthy Texan. Presidential!
    –John Kerry on road bike=snobby, sissyboy nearly French guy. Loserpants!

    The narratives are all pre-written, they just need to plug in the “evidence” pieces that fall into their laps. It might just as well have been shoes.

  85. 85
    Leto says:

    @Marcopolo: Idk, I think both Keanu and Paul Rudd found the elixir of life as neither of them have aged a day since they first appeared on screen. Seriously, go back to their earlier work and look at them today! They’re timeless!

  86. 86
    trollhattan says:

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    This video of Ichiro’s last time on a field with glove is well worth the watch. Completely captivating athlete, regardless of whether one follows baseball.

  87. 87
    A Ghost To Most says:

    @Villago Delenda Est: Funny, I never knew chopper was a dentist (or a PhD!), But I’ve always known Burns was an Esquire.

  88. 88
    WaterGirl says:

    @NobodySpecial: How did I forget that???

    My attempt to rank the crimes against humanity in order of (perceived) worst disrespect to the office to least:

    shoes on desk
    tan suit
    elite mustard
    mom jeans
    bike helmet
    asking for orange juice instead of coffee
    inflate tires to proper level

    edited to include mom jeans, and also moved mustard up in ranking.

  89. 89
    FelonyGovt says:

    I think I hate Jared and Ivanka even more than I hate Donald Jr. Their prominence in the administration really means we have become a banana republic.

  90. 90
    raven says:

    @Miss Bianca: @Miss Bianca: He didn’t really know my BIL and the service consisted of tons of pic of him on his Harley and other nefarious shots, testimonials to what a partier he was and a blasting of “Free Bird”! They buried him in the cemetery in Palos Verdes overlooking Long Beach so they can visit easily.

    After all that the preacher just said “durn, I wish I’d known him”!

  91. 91
    trollhattan says:

    @WaterGirl:
    The tire inflation thing barely made second-grade level. “Hardy, har, let’s sent out tire gages. You’re owned, libs!” Uhh.

  92. 92
    Leto says:

    @WaterGirl: She has a few pair of cable needles (designed to knit circular items) that are mobster tools in the proper hands. They’re needles that have a cable between them, so not only is she going to murder puncture you but then she has the option to strangle you too. The amount of murder weapons she has as “knitting items” is surprising! People think of knitters as these docile old ladies… not so! Also the TSA are idiots so it’s not surprising that things like knitting items make it through, yet 3.1 ounces of liquid constitutes a clear and present danger.

    @Miss Bianca: Betty would totally poke out a Trumpters eyes while Cole would probably beat the same Trumpster to death with their own arm. :p

  93. 93
    WaterGirl says:

    @Miss Bianca: Point taken. Just to be clear, I was assuming intentional harm inflicted by Betty Cracker, not accidental harm as it would be with Cole.

    I was imposing my near spontaneous combustion level rage on to Betty Cracker when perhaps I shouldn’t have.

  94. 94
    WaterGirl says:

    @Leto: TSA idiots are idiots. Check.

    I’m still not scared of Avelune, but you did make me laugh!

  95. 95
    eemom says:

    wrt knitting needles, I believe Betty is referring to Mme. Defarge in Tale of Two Cities. #englishmajorpedant

    wrt referring to oneself as “Esq.”, it is actually not the same as Ph.D., which at least serves the practical purpose of advising others of one’s professional qualifications. The degree possessed by a lawyer is a JD or LLM. “Esquire” is an honorific for addressing others who possess those degrees. A lawyer who uses it after their OWN name is advising others of their laughable ignorance and pomposity rather than their professional qualifications. Kind of like calling yourself “My Honor”. #PSA

    Just trying to be helpful. 😁

  96. 96
    Leto says:

    @WaterGirl: We laughed ourselves because she was worried about it, but after they cleared her through without a second glance we started detailing out all the ways we could take over the plane with her items. Truely, we were the deep state operators they never would’ve seen coming: the Pink Pu$$y Hat brigade! 🧶

  97. 97
    zhena gogolia says:

    @WaterGirl:

    You left out arugula.

  98. 98
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA:

    Um, Jimmy Carter’s birthday is October 1. You may be referencing the fact that (assuming he lives through the night, and I have no reason to believe he won’t) as of tomorrow he will officially become the oldest US President in history, surpassing (by a day) George H. W. Bush’s age when he died last year.

    Quite the milestone.

  99. 99
    A Ghost To Most says:

    @eemom: Useful in business.
    Elitism on a blog. Like foghorning where you got your degree. In my line of work, it was what you could accomplish, not where you got your degree, or even what your degree was.. Plenty of people from “elite” CS schools flamed out to marketing and sales. I worked with several history majors who were programming machines.

  100. 100
    trollhattan says:

    @SiubhanDuinne:
    Jimmy Carter kicked cancer’s ass!

    God, feels good to say that. Keep on keepin’ on, mister president.

  101. 101
    WaterGirl says:

    @zhena gogolia: Dammit!

  102. 102
    beergoggles says:

    First Dem candidate to say they will revoke or undo all treaties and agreements entered into by 45 gets my vote..
    Except gabbard.. she can diaf with her dad.

  103. 103
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @Leto: Remind me to tell you about the time at the Prague airport when fucking Czech “security” confiscated a pair of cuticle scissors with blades maybe an inch long out of a designer set (gift) as a “deadly weapon.” Deadly to a gerbil, maybe. Motherfuckers.

  104. 104
    FelonyGovt says:

    @Uncle Cosmo: I was turned away at Petco Park in San Diego because I was carrying my 1 inch Swiss Army Knife. Had to run it back to my hotel.

  105. 105
    boatboy_srq says:

    Someone please correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t this idea proposed in the 40s or 50s and rejected because Jordan wouldn’t give up the East Bank then? What makes anyone besides these simpletons think it would work now?

  106. 106
    Leto says:

    @Uncle Cosmo: I was on one of the second commercial flight out of Prince Sultan Air Base, Saudi Arabia after 9/11. We (there was about 10 of us) were all deployed with two full bags of chem gear. Just a ton of shit in these bags. When we got to BWI, before we could go to our connecting flights the agents at the gates made us all unpack every damn bag and display all of our stuff. Tried to get us to open sealed gas mask canisters and all other sorts of stuff, that if opened would have renders them useless. If looks could’ve killed, it would’ve been bad!

  107. 107
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @trollhattan:

    I love him. Two of my favourite possessions are (1) a photo of me with Jimmy and Rosalynn at an event I arranged at the JC childhood home in Plains, and (2) the personal (not personalized) letter he wrote me when I was recovering from my quadruple bypass surgery in 2001.

    Utmost respect.

  108. 108
    Momus says:

    Jared will surely get the Trump peace prize for this.

  109. 109
    J R in WV says:

    @dmsilev:

    I will point out now that on maps of the MId-East drawn prior to WW II, the nation now called “Jordan” was then named “Trans-Jordanian Palestine” — meaning that part of Palestine on the other, eastern, side of the Jordan River. So the question of Palestine and Jordan is an old and complex question.

  110. 110

    His loyalty seems to be to his own bank account above any allegiance whatsoever to the American people.

    You say this as though it surprises you.

  111. 111
    WaterGirl says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: I still have my letter from Barack Obama on my fridge, thanking me for going to Iowa for the two weeks before the Iowa caucus, and for my hard work and my personal convictions. It’s one of my treasures. I put heart and soul into getting him elected. If the house was burning, I would grab it from the fridge.

    How wonderful for you to have known Carter. Truly a special man.

  112. 112
    Steve in the ATL says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: checking into a hotel in Paris about twenty years ago, the desk clerk got all excited about our address and said, “Carter was from Georgia!”

    I doubt Parisian hotel clerks are excited about trump….

  113. 113
    NotMax says:

    “Daddy, Jared has the most brilliant idea! We swap Mexico with Norway. No more caravans!”

  114. 114
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @WaterGirl:

    What a treasure!

  115. 115
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Steve in the ATL:

    Cool story! I miss the days when current or former POTI were admired around the world.

  116. 116
    sm*t cl*de says:

    @PJ:

    This “solution” doesn’t address anything the stakeholders want, except, of course, Israel, which wants the Palestinians out of the territory it controls.

    There is a long US tradition of dealing with people already occupying nice land which the settlers want, by relocating them to unwanted territory somewhere else.

  117. 117
    sm*t cl*de says:

    @trollhattan:

    Jimmy Carter kicked cancer’s ass!
    God, feels good to say that. Keep on keepin’ on, mister president.

    Pres. Carter remains on-track to outlive the Guinea Worm.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dracunculus_medinensis#Eradication_program

  118. 118
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @Leto: That sux. BWI is my home airport & I travel to/from there most of the time. I think they’ve gotten better since then – they sure as fuck have had enough time.

    Everyone was freaking out then. I was in the middle of Lithuania on holiday when the Towers fell, got stranded in Iceland for a couple of days, & when they said I could board I kept setting off the metal detector. I took off the last thing with metal (my belt) & said, If this thing goes off now it’s my fillings. (It didn’t.)

    Re the scissors, I had the good fortune to stumble upon a pair on clearance at a local market that fit perfectly into the recess of the wooden-box gift set, which is now reconstituted except for the hoitytoity logo on the scissors. Of course if I put it in my Czeched bag I take the chance that TSA staff will live down to the sarcastic version of the acronym (“They’ll Steal Anything”). So when I think about it I toss the scissors & nail file into a baggie in the big bag & everything else into my carryon & hope. /tmi

  119. 119
    Steve in the ATL says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: and I sure couldn’t tell you which provinces any French presidents were from.

  120. 120
    Ruckus says:

    His loyalty seems to beto his own bank account above any allegiance whatsoever to the American people.

    Fucking seems to be?
    That phrase seems to be doing a ton of work in that sentence. And should be changed to fucking is.

  121. 121
    Ruckus says:

    @Leto:
    A few yrs ago I was in the scanner line at LAX behind a Marine cpl in his dress uniform. They fucked with this guy and basically had him all but in his boxers and sent him back and forth at least a half a dozen times. I had forgotten that I had a very small Swiss Army pen knife on my keychain and they never said anything. That Marine almost went full on wipe them all out mode. It was almost as bad as most every other time during that period they would pick on one 90 yr old grandma in pretty much the same way. I think the only reason no one ever said any thing was obvious, she was taking the heat for everyone else.

  122. 122
    Tenar Arha says:

    @Marcopolo: IIRC he does a lot of it, though not all. For your stunt enjoyment, check this out…

    Video:
    KEANU REEVES TACTICAL TRAINING FOR JOHN WICK 2 (2017)

    Article:
    The secret behind Keanu Reeves’ stunts in John Wick: Chapter 2

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