Thursday Morning Open Thread: Dolly Parton, America’s Queen of Hearts

… Although I always think of her as our Queen of Cups: loving, generous, and wise. Just for giving all those books to all those kids who need them, she’d deserve a place in the pantheon:

… “My dad didn’t get the chance to go to school. And Daddy couldn’t read and write, and that was kind of crippling to him,” Parton said. “He was such a smart man, though. He just had such good common sense. They call it horse sense in the country.”

“But Daddy thought it was just something he couldn’t learn after he was grown, so he never tried to learn to read and write. And that was just kind of embarrassing to him,” she continued. “But I didn’t want Daddy to feel embarrassed.”

Parton was determined to give the children of Sevier County something her father never had: early access to books. She started the Imagination Library in 1995, and involved her father, too. He was able to see the program take off before he died in 2000.

“He got to hear the kids call me ‘The Book Lady.’ He got a big kick out of that,” she said. “But he took great pride and felt like he’d helped do something special.”…

And if she didn’t have that golden voice, she could’ve been a successful comedian. From NYMag:

All of my life, I have been known for two things,” deadpanned Dolly Parton, as she took the stage to collect the MusiCares Person of the Year, pausing for effect, “Well, not them.”

“I’ve also been known as a singer and songwriter, too,” the country icon clarified. “Although, I’m not complaining — Ol’ Pancho and Lefty’ve been pretty good to me!” She then confided to the packed-to-the-back-wall crowd assembled at the Los Angeles Convention Center: “Everybody always expects me to do a boob joke, and I like to do that right up front.”

To illustrate Parton’s reputation as a stellar songwriter over the course of her five decade career, an A-list assembly of talent from across a wide swath of musical genres took the stage to perform her biggest hits and most personal compositions as the Recording Academy and its philanthropic arm MusiCares paid tribute to Parton’s singular accomplishments and longtime commitment to giving back at its annual Grammy Week gala…

Being honored for her contributions to music, Parton told Vulture on the red carpet, “means more than anything, because if I had to stop everything else and just choose one thing, I’d choose to be a songwriter.”…

For Nettles, who portrayed Parton’s mother in two television movies based on the icon’s childhood, Parton holds a particularly special place in her life. “For me, she is a mentor, she is an icon, she is a hero, someone I look up to as a singer/songwriter, as a woman, as a businesswoman, as a philanthropist, as an actress,” Nettles said. “She’s done it all, and she’s still so vibrant, still so relevant. I look at her, and we should all be so lucky, I think, to be able to have that kind of career and that kind of impact.”

“Those waters run really deep for her,” added Nettles. “You hear all of that depth and all of that gravitas in the stories that she tells, but then she has all this buoyancy on top that really draws us in.”

“I truly, I truly can feel the love in this house tonight — either that or my telephone’s on vibrate,” Parton cracked, telling the crowd she endured the career retrospective with a mix of dismay — “I really thought my hair looked good, back then. Can you believe that hair? Now that’s country music at its finest” — and wry reflection. “Watching them is sort of like watching porn. You’re not personally involved, but you still get off on it. So really got off on this show, tonight. Hey now, don’t blame me. At my age, you’ll take anything you can get. And I’m still hoping that I live long enough to get the Betty White longevity award. I’m working on it.”

167 replies
  1. 1
    Bruce K says:

    The more one learns about Dolly Parton, the more admirable she becomes.

    ReplyReply
  2. 2
    Steeplejack (phone) says:

    Dolly plain and true: “Coat of Many Colors.”

    ReplyReply
  3. 3
    Noah Brand says:

    Hearts, Cups, nothin’.

    She’s our Queen Of The Silver Dollar.

    ReplyReply
  4. 4
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    she has all this buoyancy on top

    Blech.

    ReplyReply
  5. 5
    rikyrah says:

    Good Morning, Everyone 😄😄😄

    ReplyReply
  6. 6
    Steeplejack (phone) says:

    Emmylou, Linda, Dolly, “After the Gold Rush.”

    ReplyReply
  7. 7
    rikyrah says:

    Always liked Ms. Parton👏👏

    ReplyReply
  8. 8
    rikyrah says:

    Ms. Parton has been a smart businesswoman.

    ReplyReply
  9. 9
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    Oh Paulie, you won’t see him no more.

    ReplyReply
  10. 10
    raven says:

    double

    ReplyReply
  11. 11
    raven says:

    @Steeplejack (phone): Saw your Spirit comments. I had a particular experience with acid and a sunrise that evoked Ice. And my groundhog video with Bohdi. . .well you know.

    ReplyReply
  12. 12
    raven says:

    And speaking of Zeppelin. Dolly and Stairway.

    ReplyReply
  13. 13
    Bobby Thomson says:

    The correction is incorrect, which is apparent reading the story. 100 millionth book delivered; the program is now up to 1 million books per month.

    ReplyReply
  14. 14
    Baud says:

    @rikyrah: Good morning.

    Dolly’s good people.

    ReplyReply
  15. 15
    Pogonip says:

    When I grow up, I want to be just like Dolly Parton.

    ReplyReply
  16. 16
  17. 17
    Baud says:

    @Bobby Thomson: We interrupt this correction to bring you this correction to the correction.

    ReplyReply
  18. 18
    Chet says:

    “Pancho and Lefty” 😂😂😂

    As an 80s kid my first exposure to Dolly Parton was “Islands in the Stream.” Pretty decent song (although it’s a Bee Gees song). But the more I learn about her music and her character the more I respect her. She is a treasure.

    ReplyReply
  19. 19
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    Republicans had signaled earlier on Wednesday that Trump would not sign legislation that includes back pay for federal contractors,

    Because stiffing contractors is just how he rolls.

    ReplyReply
  20. 20
    rikyrah says:

    😠😠😠

    Red T Raccoon (@RedTRaccoon) Tweeted:
    A GOP proposal could snatch your student loan payment right from your paycheck.

    https://t.co/zLoWzipsIM https://twitter.com/RedTRaccoon/status/1095886264434348033?s=17

    ReplyReply
  21. 21
    rikyrah says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:
    Story of his business life😠😠

    ReplyReply
  22. 22
    raven says:

    Ok, I got the roses and cards on the table! Let her rip.

    ReplyReply
  23. 23
    satby says:

    @raven: Happy Valentine’s Day to your princess.

    @rikyrah: Good morning rikyrah!

    ReplyReply
  24. 24
    raven says:

    @satby: She always pretends she’s surprised!

    ReplyReply
  25. 25
    rikyrah says:

    Cheri Jacobus (@CheriJacobus) Tweeted:
    CNN promotes Schultz as a way to help Trump. Zucker & his bff Trump have a deal. Zucker helped Trump win, and Trump pretend-slams CNN to help them compete w/ MSNBC. (Trump never mentions MSNBC) CNN books discredited Trumpkins to legitimize them. We are being played. Again

    . https://t.co/DjNAuHrlhx https://twitter.com/CheriJacobus/status/1095914601479311360?s=17

    ReplyReply
  26. 26
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    Valentines day. Triple Blech.

    ReplyReply
  27. 27
  28. 28
    Bobby Thomson says:

    @Baud: those responsible for the correction have been sacked.

    ReplyReply
  29. 29
    JPL says:

    I’ve always liked Dolly.

    ReplyReply
  30. 30
    satby says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: well mine started out positively Cole-ish because the cat puked on me in bed.
    Even with no Valentines to get, the day can only improve from here.

    ReplyReply
  31. 31
    oldster says:

    I just went to Ilhan Omar’s ActBlue page and kicked in a contribution.

    It’s the best way I know of saying “thank you” to her, immediately and directly, for her questioning of Eliott Abrams yesterday.

    There have been many Dem politicians that I have admired in the last few decades. But very, very few of them have been willing to buck the DC code of elite unaccountability. According to that code, if you are part of the inner circle, then the laws don’t apply to you. If you break them, you get pardoned. And you continue as a member in good standing.

    (Henry Kissinger is exhibit A for this.)

    If Omar is going to challenge that status quo, then I am going to stand with her.

    ReplyReply
  32. 32
    Amir Khalid says:

    My own favourite of Dolly Parton’s songs is this not-so-well-known one she wrote for Emmylou Harris, To Daddy.
    ETA: A cautionary tale for husbands everywhere.

    ReplyReply
  33. 33
    Amir Khalid says:

    @Bobby Thomson:
    I fear for those responsible for sacking those responsible for the correction.

    ReplyReply
  34. 34
    JPL says:

    From the Washington Post
    For Valentine’sss Day, this zoo says it has just the right snake for your venomous ex
    Just what I always wanted to do.. Name a snake for my ex. lol
    link

    ReplyReply
  35. 35
    Immanentize says:

    @JPL:
    Snakes? For the poetry minded, and perfect for a Valentine’s Day Blech, here is probably my favorite poem:
    The Viper by Nicanor Parra

    ReplyReply
  36. 36
    Matt McIrvin says:

    When these “Dolly Parton is awesome” stories pop up I keep thinking they’re obituaries and getting sad.

    ReplyReply
  37. 37

    Man. I remember Dolly when she was on the telebision w/ Porter Wagoner.

    ReplyReply
  38. 38
    debbie says:

    @oldster:

    NPR reported this morning on the hearings, but it included nothing at all about her part in them.

    ReplyReply
  39. 39
    JPL says:

    Scott Pelley is on CBS This Morning discussing the upcoming 60 minutes interview with Andrew McCabe. There were open discussions about how to remove the president. Wow! The asshole is gonna be pissed after that segment airs on Sunday. Must watch TV!

    ReplyReply
  40. 40
    debbie says:

    @JPL:

    Zoos are also selling naming rights for cockroaches which will be fed to whatever animals eat them.

    ReplyReply
  41. 41
    JPL says:

    @Immanentize: New song. . .
    What is lust?
    Baby don’t hurt me
    Don’t hurt me
    No more

    ReplyReply
  42. 42
    Immanentize says:

    @JPL:

    My favorite line from The Viper is:

    She would not let me use the toothbrush I had given her myself,

    Says it all.

    ReplyReply
  43. 43
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    The best Valentine gift? Not having to buy one at all

    Back when my wife and I started getting serious I told her, “If you want roses on Valentines Day, diamonds for anniversaries, romantic dinners on your birthdays, you better find someone else. You’ll be lucky if I even notice one of them.”

    She likes to say she “married a frog and you’re still a frog.”

    ReplyReply
  44. 44
    Steeplejack (phone) says:

    @raven:

    Cool song. And I remember the pooch vs. varmint video.

    ReplyReply
  45. 45

    Dolly Parton is one of the good people.

    ReplyReply
  46. 46
    Kay says:

    Trump just said on the radio “I think I made my point” with the shutdown.

    The government shutdown cost the economy $11 billion, including a permanent $3 billion loss, Congressional Budget Office says

    Reckless, coddled, insulated people who operate entirely from selfishness. It’s nothing to them.

    Next time the flight attendants and air traffic controllers should go out immediately. They’ll open it right back up the minute a single airport closes. They need to be personally inconvenienced and the slightest inconvenience won’t be tolerated for more than half a day. They have to feel it and they’re so coddled and insulated it doesn’t take much.

    ReplyReply
  47. 47
    JPL says:

    Sunday night we need a thread for the 60 minutes interview. I’m gonna make me some popcorn.
    McCabe says he ordered the obstruction of justice probe of President Trump
    link

    ReplyReply
  48. 48
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    The Cat Ladders of Bern Some fairly ingenious creations. For architectural flair, I think this is my favorite .

    ReplyReply
  49. 49
    debbie says:

    @Immanentize:

    Call me jaded, but I like David Rakoff’s interpretation of the fable about the tortoise and the scorpion. It works for me for Valentine’s Day.

    ReplyReply
  50. 50
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Kay: I read somewhere (WaPo, I think) that the flight attendants did plan to strike — and call for a general strike — immediately if there was a second shutdown. That’s probably a major factor in the GOP fold.

    ReplyReply
  51. 51
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Kay:

    Next time the flight attendants and air traffic controllers should go out immediately.

    Amen.

    ReplyReply
  52. 52
    Splitting Image says:

    Dolly Parton is everything that Donald Trump only claims to be. She is a genuinely good businesswoman and a serious Christian. Her family has always meant an awful lot to her.

    She also bankrolled Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel, so she’s got that going for her, too.

    ReplyReply
  53. 53
    Steeplejack (phone) says:

    @M. Bouffant:

    Heh, “I Will Always Love You” was supposedly written about Porter Wagoner. Think about that the next time you hear Whitney Houston sing it.

    ReplyReply
  54. 54
    Baud says:

    @Splitting Image:

    David Boreanaz has had a silently impressive TV career.

    ReplyReply
  55. 55

    Rosenstein had better be cleaning out his desk.

    Wow – McCabe also tells CBS that Rosenstein's offer to wear a wire with the president was raised more than once and that McCabe took it to the lawyers at the FBI to discuss. https://t.co/R0pT5UI0RN— Jim Sciutto (@jimsciutto) February 14, 2019

    ReplyReply
  56. 56
    satby says:

    “My dad didn’t get the chance to go to school. And Daddy couldn’t read and write, and that was kind of crippling to him,” Parton said

    Illiteracy is crippling. We take basic literacy for granted in this country. And we shouldn’t, because we have an estimated 30 million adults who can’t read above a third grade level.

    ReplyReply
  57. 57
    Steeplejack (phone) says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    Great pictures!

    ReplyReply
  58. 58
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Immanentize: @Kay: If you and the other lawyers here haven’t yet read it, I think you’d really appreciate this long read Cole front paged yesterday: People Laughed When This Philly Lawyer Sued Led Zeppelin. Nobody’s Laughing Now.

    “Welcome to Hogwarts,” Malofiy jokes as he shows me around the vast oak and stained-glass room that houses the law library at the Beasley Firm, possibly the most fearsome and feared personal-injury law firm in the city, where he worked, in an of-counsel capacity, from 2012 to 2014.

    Fresh out of law school and still wet behind the ears, Malofiy showed up one day in search of mentoring. Granted an audience with Jim Beasley Jr., one of the most successful plaintiff’s attorney in the city, Malofiy ended up with a promise of rent-free office space, the phone extension 666, and a commitment to help finance some of the highly ambitious cases he was mounting — a product-liability suit against Volvo, and a breach-of-contract suit, against a marble manufacturer that had screwed his client out of an ownership share, that resulted in a $4.2 million verdict — not to mention the Usher case. “Jim was like, ‘I keep getting calls from defense lawyers saying That kid’s the fucking devil, so you must be doing something right,’” Malofiy recalls.

    During Malofiy’s tenure at Beasley, he took out a controversial full-page ad in this magazine that depicted him crashing through a courtroom in a hot rod, looking every bit James Dean in Rebel Without a Cause. Many members of Philadelphia’s uptight, buttoned-down legal community thought it was disrespectful. “Everyone was outraged, but I thought it was funny,” says Beasley. “He has a pretty good ‘fuck you’ attitude that comes from an inner confidence. He might have had a little too much of that early on, but I think he’s throttled back a bit. So many of a judge’s decisions are ties and jump-balls that are not reversible, and if you piss the judge off with your pirate act, the judge can make it difficult for you. Sometimes you could avoid all that by not swinging your pirate sword around.”

    He is quite the character:

    At Malofiy’s insistence, I’ve been tailing him for the better part of a month: from a big-dollar NDA’d settlement in a judge’s quarters, to a Port Richmond dive bar called Chuckles, to a Bucks County gun shop where he plunked down $1,729 for a handsome Benelli shotgun (a gift for his right-hand man Fluehr), to a back-alley strip bar in Center City and the disused factory under the Commodore Barry Bridge that he’s purchased and plans to renovate into office space, living quarters and a beer garden. I watched him hide his $82,000 Land Rover from the repo man (“It’s all a misunderstanding”) and then, days later, saw a pile of white letter-size envelopes stacked on his desk, each containing what looked to be thousands in cash. What I have come to learn is this: When you write about lawyers, there is so much you can’t write about lawyers.

    ReplyReply
  59. 59
    JPL says:

    @Dorothy A. Winsor: CBS This Morning interview with Scott Pelley

    link

    Who’s on babysitting duty this morning?

  60. 60
    Kathleen says:

    @rikyrah: Since it’s Rethug proposal, you don’t even have to have a student loan!

    ReplyReply
  61. 61
    Highway Rob says:

    @raven:

    Ok, I got the roses and cards on the table! Let her rip.

    Long ago it was decreed that V-Day would no longer be a gift giving holiday in our house. And this year I was told I should not get flowers, either. I like getting her nice things; what was I to do?

    Brownies. From the really good bakery. We ate ’em two days early. Winner winner brownie dinner.

    ReplyReply
  62. 62
    oldster says:

    @debbie:

    Wow, that’s very disappointing. When Omar is holding a war criminal accountable, that is newsworthy.

    But Nice Polite Republicans don’t want to hear that a long-time Washington insider is a war criminal.

    ReplyReply
  63. 63
    germy says:

    Dolly, the first cloned sheep, was named after Ms. Parton. Because the scientists were basically giggling schoolboys deep inside their hearts.

    ReplyReply
  64. 64
    OldDave says:

    I’ll just leave this here: Jolene at 33 rpm…

    ReplyReply
  65. 65
    germy says:

    Drunk History examines the history of Dolly Parton and Porter.

    ReplyReply
  66. 66
    Immanentize says:

    @Highway Rob: my experience was, even if Julie and I had decided to not give gifts or really cut back on some given holiday, really beautiful jewelry was never rejected.

    ReplyReply
  67. 67
    germy says:

    CBS Evening News hasn’t been the same since Scott Pelley left. There were times during his broadcasts that I thought he might be a Balloon-Juice commenter, the way he dug deeper into the top stories, highlighting details the other networks ignored.

    ReplyReply
  68. 68
    JPL says:

    @Immanentize: At least you didn’t give her a framed copy of your favorite poem.

    ReplyReply
  69. 69
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @germy: All men are basically giggling schoolboys deep inside their hearts.

    ReplyReply
  70. 70
    germy says:

    "Fox News has rejected a national advertising buy for a 30-second spot that warns viewers about the potential dangers of American fascism." https://t.co/xeARBMqk8K
    — Michael Calderone (@mlcalderone) February 13, 2019

    ReplyReply
  71. 71
    Baud says:

    @germy:

    There are certain things you can’t put a price on.

    ReplyReply
  72. 72
    Kay says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    That’s probably a major factor in the GOP fold.

    I think it was and it wasn’t covered enough, I believe because it makes them feel vulnerable that the lowly flight attendants can wield all that power. It was covered a lot on labor twitter :)

    I just think it’s both amusing and sad that all those employees suffered for weeks and weeks and the MOMENT it became even potentially inconvenient for powerful people they were all screaming for relief. Weeks and weeks compared to, um, 4 hours. That’s the “capacity for pain differential” between the two groups. They’re cream puffs.

    ReplyReply
  73. 73
    raven says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: Did you see my comment last night? My brother sued them on behalf of Jake Holmes and Dazed and Confused and they settled.

    ReplyReply
  74. 74
    germy says:

    Fox News reportedly rejected a national advertising buy warning about the potential for fascism to take root in America after network leadership deemed it inappropriate "for their air," according to The Hollywood Reporter. https://t.co/DZaMGaHsEf
    — Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) February 14, 2019

    ReplyReply
  75. 75
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @Immanentize: Mrs G&T and I decided long, long ago that Valentine’s Day is for amateurs and have ignored it. But you’re right, good jewelry is never rejected.

    ReplyReply
  76. 76
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @JPL: What makes you so sure he didn’t

    ReplyReply
  77. 77
    Baud says:

    @Kay:

    They’re cream puffs.

    They put aside their racism to elect Obama by a large margin in 2008 because their 401(k)’s we’re hurting, but when things were better for them in 2016….well, you know the rest.

    ReplyReply
  78. 78
    zhena gogolia says:

    @Steeplejack (phone):

    I love that. Miley did a pretty good job with her at the Grammys. That can’t have been easy.

    ReplyReply
  79. 79
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @raven: No, I never read the comments on dead threads. Good for him.

    ReplyReply
  80. 80
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Splitting Image: She even has her own theme park, which I’ve never been to but is by all accounts an excellent theme park.

    ReplyReply
  81. 81
    germy says:

    New movie coming out about a man (an unsuccessful rock musician) who gets knocked on the head and wakes up in the world where there were no Beatles. But he knows all the songs.

    So he performs the songs and takes credit for the songwriting, causing a major sensation:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uqvgPm8U4c

    From the dirctor of Slumdog Millionaire

    ReplyReply
  82. 82
    David 🎅🎄Merry Christmas🎄🎅 Koch says:

    If only someone had warned McCabe that planting smears against Clinton could result in Drumpf’s election, who in turn would trash him and his wife and take away his pension.

    ReplyReply
  83. 83
    Immanentize says:

    @JPL: @OzarkHillbilly: She knew I loved that poem, but no copy hanging in our home.
    I did have her read Gregory Corso’s poem, Marriage when we were engaged. She thought it was a hoot (it is).

    ReplyReply
  84. 84
    Kay says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    Personal injury and criminal defense lawyers are the mavericks – they’re generally interesting people. They see themselves as underdogs but they really enjoy the role. Even if they’re quiet and serious (and some of them are) if you talk to them they’ll often have passionate opinions. We had a big shot personal injury lawyer run the volunteer voter protection effort for Obama in Toledo in ’08. He did a really good job. He worked harder than anyone, and it was rigorous. He’d hold meetings at 8 AM but you didn’t mind because he’d been there since 7, reviewing election laws. It was as good as any paid effort would have been, and we were all volunteers.

    ReplyReply
  85. 85
  86. 86
    delk says:

    My husband and I took a road trip to her theme park, ‘DollyWood’ one Xmas. If they could put a string of lights on it, they did. So much fun we did it again a few years later.

    ReplyReply
  87. 87
    Immanentize says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:
    Thanks for that read! I love the older attorney’s comments about jump balls and how you learn that you can’t always be wild because it will hurt your client. But you can almost always be the best prepared person in the courtroom…

    My early lawyer days in Miami were as wild as they were serious. I swear crack cocaine was invented like 6 months before I started. It was devastating poor people, minority communities, street life folk — i.e. my client base. Meanwhile, prosecutors would celebrate sending some poor prostitute to jail for a gram of rock while they had an eight ball of powder in their pocket. And then, AIDS….

    ReplyReply
  88. 88
    Kay says:

    The contract employees must not have worked during the shutdown, right? It’s against the law to not pay people for work. They shouldn’t need a special Trump dispensation if they worked and weren’t paid.

    ReplyReply
  89. 89
    Immanentize says:

    @raven: I had no idea your brother was a lawyer. Good for him, he seems to have (at least some) interesting clients.

    ReplyReply
  90. 90
    Immanentize says:

    @Kay: But the government is not responsible for contract worker’s pay — the contracting company is.

    That’s why Trump served friggin junk food to athletes.

    ReplyReply
  91. 91
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Kay:

    Personal injury and criminal defense lawyers are the mavericks

    Some of my best friends are criminal defense lawyers. Hmmmmmmm…

    ReplyReply
  92. 92
    O. Felix Culpa says:

    @Highway Rob:

    Brownies.

    That’s what I was requested to make for V Day. My killer, to-die-for truffle brownies. They’ll be ready to devour when Ms. O gets back from work.

    ReplyReply
  93. 93
    O. Felix Culpa says:

    @JPL:

    At least you didn’t give her a framed copy of your favorite poem.

    Hmmm, sounds like there’s a story behind that.

    ReplyReply
  94. 94
    Kay says:

    @Immanentize:

    Exactly. They can’t contract around paying them for work that is performed, can they? It’s illegal.

    I know I rant but this is what I mean about “pain” and “accountability”. If the contractors take a hit this will stop. We’ve swaddled these people in layers of cotton and then we wonder why they’re so reckless. They have to get hurt. Now we know something else- we know that even a slight injury or the mere threat of an inconvenience (the flight attendants did not actually go out or make any formal move to go out) makes them fold, so it doesn’t even have to painful for the rest of us. The equivalent of a weather delay at an airport is unbearable – “forget the wall- make it stop!”

    ReplyReply
  95. 95
    Immanentize says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    Some of my best friends are criminal defense lawyers

    And they call you “Client?”

    ReplyReply
  96. 96
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Immanentize:

    O God, and the wedding! All her family and her friends
    and only a handful of mine all scroungy and bearded
    just waiting to get at the drinks and food-

    I think he attended my first wedding.

    ReplyReply
  97. 97
    Elizabelle says:

    Good morning, Valentine jackals.

    Dolly Parton is a good person to bring to mind more often. Be like Dolly.

    ReplyReply
  98. 98
    Immanentize says:

    While we are talking lawyers, have you guys ever checked out the Cindy Lauper spoof, I’m Billing in Time? Cracks me up every time I hear it.

    ReplyReply
  99. 99
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Immanentize: They call me all kinds of things, most of which are unsuitable for a family blog.

    ReplyReply
  100. 100
    Immanentize says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: I know he attended mine — my cousin was my best (and only) man. We had a very small wedding.

    ReplyReply
  101. 101
    Kay says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    My husband is one so I’m biased but if they’re any good at all they’re worth every penny. They really do make a huge difference.
    My husband was a prosecutor and left and switched sides, which is not at all uncommon. Prosecutors get a ton of trial experience and they know all the players in that world, so it’s an easy transition. His heart was never in putting them away- he was always in trouble with superiors- it’s really top down. He’s happier on the other side. Better fit.
    I had a close friend tell me “oh, that’s too bad, I liked him in a white hat” and I just found that so offensive. Like the other side is a black hat.

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  102. 102
    Immanentize says:

    @Kay: Lots of contractors had to work — they aren’t furloughed or made “essential personnel.” Many were laid off for the three weeks, but lots of privatized parts of government just continued and the contractors will now have to eat the cost.

    You know what’s privatized? Drone operations. But I think the DOD runs that and they were not part of the shutdown….

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  103. 103
    chopper says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    part of me thinks they put that in there just to dare him to not sign it. everybody knows how he is about not paying contractors.

    ReplyReply
  104. 104

    I’ve been massaging my Orion Nebula pic, here’s the updated version.

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  105. 105
    Immanentize says:

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA: very nice! Fannebulistic!

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  106. 106

    @Immanentize: I’m thinking of breaking out the telescope if it ever clears here.

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  107. 107
    JoeyJoeJoe says:

    @Matt McIrvin: I’ll be there in April. It’s right next to the Smoky Mountains, so a good place for a multi day trip. Pictures will be coming

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  108. 108
    JPL says:

    @Immanentize: Yes it is.

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  109. 109
    JPL says:

    @germy: Why would they refuse to air it? guilty conscience possibly.

    ReplyReply
  110. 110
    WaterGirl says:

    Good thoughts for you and your pups, TaMara as Scout goes in to get spayed and Baby gets to go to the vet.

    How did Baby do with his toy when he got it back?

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  111. 111
    Amir Khalid says:

    Bill Cosby maintains he did nothing wrong and is a political prisoner, per this CNN report. Talk about denial …

    ReplyReply
  112. 112
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Kay: A very good friends was a Fed PD. She caught a case against a made guy once. The cops fucked up and the prosecutors doubled down on the shady shit in a hearing and she caught them all red handed in the cookie jar. Got the case thrown out lickety split.

    As he is walking out of court a free man he stops and says to her, “If any one ever gives you any kind of trouble what so ever, you got a freebie coming, Just call me.” She likes to remind people that she’s still owed a free hit so we better not piss her off.

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  113. 113
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @JPL: Nah, it’s the oldest rule in the grifter’s book: Never clue in the mark.

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  114. 114
    Amir Khalid says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:
    Are you sure she hasn’t called in that favour yet? ;)

    ReplyReply
  115. 115
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @🐾BillinGlendaleCA: I think everybody went there at once. No can lookee.

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  116. 116
    germy says:

    @JPL:

    Why would they refuse to air it? guilty conscience possibly.

    Doesn’t fit with their brand.

    ReplyReply
  117. 117
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Amir Khalid: I’m not about to test the boundaries to find out.

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  118. 118
    Yarrow says:

    But of course…

    EXCLUSIVE w/ @woodruffbets Trump’s DHS Guts Task Forces Protecting Elections From Foreign Meddling https://t.co/pIW2LUY0O4— Erin Banco (@ErinBanco) February 14, 2019

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  119. 119
    oldster says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    Thanks, OH. So at least a left-leaning UK paper is covering it, even if the US press is keeping it under wraps.

    ReplyReply
  120. 120
    Kay says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    Just knowing people matters a lot. Not in a gross way, not “special favors”, but just spending a lot of time with that crowd and knowing what they’ll do and how they operate. There’s a real home court advantage.
    I watched a true crime trial once and the defendant brought in a Detroit attorney to Virginia and I knew they would be mean and unfair to the Detroit lawyer, and they were. They were all like “no one knows our rules” in this proud way. I was outraged on his behalf, because Virginia doesn’t actually have unique rules on basic civil rights process protections, at least I hope they don’t. I’m pretty sure they’re still covered by the constitution, although CLEARLY very learned and superior :)

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  121. 121
    Yarrow says:

    @zhena gogolia: Well, Dolly is Miley’s godmother so they may have some experience singing together.

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  122. 122
    raven says:

    @Immanentize: Wolfman Jack’s estate too! He and his partner did airline litigation but, as he says, planes quit falling out of the sky. Since he already was managing the Floyd cover band entertainment and copyright seemed to be a good way to go.

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  123. 123
    Gin & Tonic says:

    In reading about the affairs of my local government I have found that one of the (lesser-known, I guess) appointed town officials is the “Sealer of Weights and Measures.” Now I’m intrigued as to what his responsibilities are.

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  124. 124
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Kay: Yep, talk to the locals and hire the guy they recommend. I had a DFS case worker (division of family services) recommend a guy to me when the shit hit the fan with my ex’s husband. She said something along the lines of “He and I have sparred plenty in court. He’s mean and tough but I respect him.”

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  125. 125
    Gelfling 545 says:

    @Baud: His father, Dave Thomas, was a local celebrity here in Buffalo as a weatherman and Commander Tom on the Rocketship 7 kids’ show.

    ReplyReply
  126. 126
    Mnemosyne says:

    Speaking of adult literacy, G tutored an adult learner whose second language is English and who had given up trying to learn to read while she was in school because her teachers were so impatient. Now she’s taking classes to get her GED so she can find something better than fast food work. And I think we may be invited to her younger daughter’s quinceñera.

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  127. 127
    donnah says:

    @germy:

    We started watching CBS evening news after Trump has elected because Scott Pelley was unafraid to call Trump a liar. Pelley delivered straighforward news and didn’t hesitate to say when the Republicans and Trump were doing questionable things.

    I wrote to CBS news and told them I appreciated Pelley’s commentary; soon after that he was “relocated” to 60 Minutes. I hope he can still ask the tough questions.

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  128. 128
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Gin & Tonic: Here in Misery the state Dept of Agriculture has the job of testing and certifying that all “Weights and Measures” are accurate. I see their seals on gas pumps and scales all the time. I’d bet that’s what his job is

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  129. 129
    Kathleen says:

    @Kay: I hired an attorney in St Mary’s to handle matter for family member. I thank God for him every day. He was a gem.

    ReplyReply
  130. 130
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    And I think we may be invited to her younger daughter’s quinceñera.

    That should be fun.

    ReplyReply
  131. 131
    raven says:

    @Mnemosyne: My dissertation was a look at the lives of some GED grads and, for many of them, quitting school was a good idea.

    ReplyReply
  132. 132
    eclare says:

    @JPL: The herpetologist here at the Memphis Zoo named the reticulated python after his ex, Ann. One day that 20 foot long monster broke through the glass!

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  133. 133
    eclare says:

    @M. Bouffant: I know Whitney gets all the love, but I always preferred Dolly’s version of I Will Always Love You.

    ReplyReply
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  135. 135
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: Well, there’s a separate position for “Public Weigher.”

    ReplyReply
  136. 136
    raven says:

    @Mnemosyne: I do hope she intends to go further than her GED.

    ReplyReply
  137. 137
    Kay says:

    Eric Umansky
    ‏Verified account
    @ericuman
    1h1 hour ago
    More
    Trump admin officials are supposed to avoid lobbying for 5 years after leaving office.
    We found 33 former officials who are already back at it, including Ryan Zinke.
    Almost all work on issues they oversaw or helped shape while they were in govt.

    “Avoid”. What a bullshit word. Countries collapse from corruption and we’re not unique. If this keeps up unchecked we’ll be in that club. We’re not immune. The shit will really hit the fan when contracts can’t be enforced without bribes – when one of these people turns to The Rule Of Law and it isn’t there anymore. They all take it for granted but it’s not a given. It’s an infection and it spreads.

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  138. 138
    Amir Khalid says:

    @eclare:
    I agree. Whitney’s vocal fireworks are spectacular, but have always struck me as a poor fit for the lyrics. These aren’t words you shout to someone from a distance; Dolly meant them to be uttered tenderly to the one you’re breaking up with, perhaps with a touch of regret, in an intimate setting, and that’s how she did the song.

    ReplyReply
  139. 139
    eclare says:

    @Amir Khalid: Exactly.

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  140. 140
    The Lodger says:

    @Gin & Tonic: Back in PA the gas pumps all had stamps from the county superintendent of weights and measures with his name on them. It was a bit odd because I knew the guy.

    ReplyReply
  141. 141
    Highway Rob says:

    This thread may’ve gone the way of the dodo, but in case it hasn’t:

    @Immanentize: I’d ordinarily agree with you, but I could tell from her tone and the look in her eye that “no, not even jewelry” was the rule this time.

    @O. Felix Culpa: Recipe?

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  142. 142
    Just One More Canuck says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: nice thing to have in your back pocket

    ReplyReply
  143. 143
    satby says:

    @raven: why?
    Asking because I pulled my younger (smarter) kid out of high school to home school rather than have him drop out.

    ReplyReply
  144. 144
    Haroldo says:

    @Kay:

    “Avoid”. What a bullshit word. Countries collapse from corruption and we’re not unique. If this keeps up unchecked we’ll be in that club. We’re not immune. The shit will really hit the fan when contracts can’t be enforced without bribes – when one of these people turns to The Rule Of Law and it isn’t there anymore. They all take it for granted but it’s not a given. It’s an infection and it spreads.

    And we are well on our way. Transparency.org ranks the US as the 22nd least corrupt country in the world (out of 180).

    https://www.transparency.org/cpi2018

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  145. 145
    satby says:

    @Mnemosyne: that’s so nice! G is making a huge difference for that woman and her family.

    ReplyReply
  146. 146
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    I hear the jets a-screamin’,
    As their wheels hit the cement,
    But I ain’t seen the sunshine
    Since Trump was President –

    I’m stuck in this damn prison
    For an eternity,
    But it beats bein’ a free man
    Drinkin’ polonium tea…

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  147. 147
    O. Felix Culpa says:

    @Highway Rob: Truffle brownie recipe here. I skip the nuts and use a reduced amount of half-and-half (around 2/3 cup or a little less) in place of the 3/4 cup cream in the ganache. I also like to add a little bit of strong coffee or Kahlua to the batter for a hint of mocha flavor.

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  148. 148
    Brachiator says:

    @satby:

    Illiteracy is crippling. We take basic literacy for granted in this country. And we shouldn’t, because we have an estimated 30 million adults who can’t read above a third grade level.

    And one of those adults is currently the president of the United States.

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  149. 149
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @raven: @satby: Speaking for myself (and maybe for my sons too) because some of us just don’t fit into such structured environments.

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  150. 150
    VeniceRiley says:

    @eclare: Dolly says she made a whole lot more money off Whitney’s version.

    ReplyReply
  151. 151
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Brachiator: And it’s crippling the country.

    ReplyReply
  152. 152
    satby says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: my youngest kid didn’t. I didn’t either really. But we’re all pretty literate at least.

    ReplyReply
  153. 153
    Highway Rob says:

    @O. Felix Culpa: Thanks!

    ReplyReply
  154. 154
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @satby: Both my sons are voracious readers. At least I passed on one good thing.

    ReplyReply
  155. 155
    satby says:

    @Brachiator: @OzarkHillbilly: I think his lack of function is because he’s declining cognitively. Seriously declining. And that we’re somewhat powerless in the ability to remove him shows the weakness in our version of democracy.

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  156. 156
    Brachiator says:

    @Amir Khalid:

    Whitney’s vocal fireworks are spectacular, but have always struck me as a poor fit for the lyrics. These aren’t words you shout to someone from a distance; Dolly meant them to be uttered tenderly to the one you’re breaking up with, perhaps with a touch of regret, in an intimate setting, and that’s how she did the song.

    I understand exactly what you mean and yet I absolutely love Whitney Houston’s version. It’s not just the vocal fireworks, but the feeling that is also conveyed.

    I did not know for a time that Parton was the songwriter, and when I heard her sing it, I admit that I still preferred Houston’s version, but acknowledged Parton as a great damn songwriter.

    ReplyReply
  157. 157
    raven says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: Hunters in a farmers world.

    ReplyReply
  158. 158
    dww44 says:

    @donnah:They caved to the monied class. As is almost always the case. Another reason that we must reclaim our representative democracy from their outsized influence.

    ReplyReply
  159. 159
    Brachiator says:

    @satby:

    I think his lack of function is because he’s declining cognitively. Seriously declining.

    I don’t think that there was ever much there. But I keep reading armchair diagnoses of Trump’s various supposed disabilities. Doesn’t matter since the official report says that he is the healthiest president ever.

    And that we’re somewhat powerless in the ability to remove him shows the weakness in our version of democracy.

    I don’t know what country has a version of democracy that has recently removed a president or prime minister because of diminished capacity, etc.

    ReplyReply
  160. 160
    stinger says:

    @OldDave:

    I’ll just leave this here: Jolene at 33 rpm…

    One of my fave recordings ever!

    ReplyReply
  161. 161
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @Immanentize: I saw Corso at Goucher College in the late 1960s. He read some fairly nondescript verse & then asked if anyone had a request. The crowd stood up as one person & shouted in chorus,

    Marriage!
    We want Marriage!
    You must read Marriage!

    “But I can’t,” he halfwhimpered, & again as one the crowd roared, Why not? – & he pointed to his wife & child in the first row. Fuckin’ copout he was.

    (I used to be famous for dramatic readings of “Marriage” – & I still owe one to a dear friend & his wife, who I have never met because I’ve never been able to arrange to visit them – & I had to miss their wedding because my only niece was gatting married the very same day 500 miles away. Time to arrange that visit & brush up my memory. Should I get married? Should I be good? Astound the girl next door with my velvet suit & faustus hood? Usw .)

    (ETF Thai Poes)

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  162. 162
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    And the priest! He looking at me if I masturbated
    asking me Do you take this woman for your lawful wedded wife?
    And I trembling what to say say Pie Glue!
    I kiss the bride all those corny men slapping me on the back
    She’s all yours, boy! Ha-ha-ha!
    And in their eyes you could see some obscene honeymoon going on–

    IMHO “Marriage” is the ultimate example of what I cal “slapstick poetry” – begging to be hammed up up the Wazoon (there’s that river in Pennsyltucky again!) in performance.

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  163. 163
    Kosh III says:

    She’s such an asset to the country. I only wish she had felt led to enter poltics: Gov. Parton-D or Sen. Parton-D. Woohoo

    ReplyReply
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  165. 165
    indianbadger1 says:

    I always appreciated how she completely cracked Johnny Carson on the Tonight Show.

    Carson: Are those really yours? (Staring at her immense cleavage)

    Dolly: Of course Johnny, I paid for ”em!

    Carson just went under the desk laughing.

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  166. 166

    Ms. Parton is a quality human, and classy to the core (ribald humor included).

    Good for her, and good for the children getting the books.

    ReplyReply
  167. 167
    cckids says:

    @eclare:

    I know Whitney gets all the love, but I always preferred Dolly’s version of I Will Always Love You.

    One of my favorite Dolly moments was sometime after Whitney’s version was the massive hit it became; Dolly was on some morning show & the host asked her if it didn’t bother her that Whitney’s version was so so much bigger than hers had been. Dolly laughed, patted his arm and said “Oh honey. Have you ever heard of royalties? Whitney can sing ANY song of mine she’d like.” She’s awesome.

    ReplyReply

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