So, a couple of days ago, as we were entertaining visitors in the Swamp Compound, we all got to see a “nature, red in tooth and claw” drama play out right under our noses. First, this Great Blue Heron speared a big old bullfrog:
Sad for the frog, but at least its ordeal was short-lived. It soon became clear that the heron couldn’t figure out how to get the dead frog off its face, which it needed to do in order to eat the frog. It tried shaking its head vigorously, snapping its beak, etc., but the frog remained firmly affixed.
Meanwhile, the heron’s frantic frog-dislodging activities attracted the attention of a nearby hawk, which offered to assist by dive-bombing the heron and trying to snatch the frog away in its talons. It tried several times as we watched. (And as I fumbled with the damned camera to try to switch to video mode to capture the hawk attack — unsuccessfully!)
Eventually, the heron flew away across the river, with the frog still attached to its face. There’s probably a metaphor in there somewhere.
Open thread!
Amir Khalid
Maybe the heron went home to its next, and its mate was able to help.
jl
@Amir Khalid: Looking for some relief from the blood drenched Darwinian hellhole Cracker has moved to?
I just hope Cracker gets the camera working soon enough for a last pic when Godzilla or King Kong lurch out of the mists.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
“The heron who speared the bullfrog” is the new “the dog who caught the car”?
SiubhanDuinne
Seeing numerous reports (although none of them very well sourced) saying that AF1 has been spotted over the UK and Europe, heading toward the Middle East. Is Trump meeting with Erdogan, or the Saudis, or has he been shamed into visiting troops in Syria/Afghanistan?
germy
Is this like the trump presidency? He chases after the nomination, wins the election and then is stuck with it all over his face when his efforts to profit are scrutinized. Mueller (the hawk) swoops down to snatch away his presidency.
Major Major Major Major
I find it’s best to let these things speak for themselves…
chris
Man, I hate when something gets stuck in my teeth! Good luck, Great Blue.
I hope Santa was good to y’all. I’m off for a long walk to work on the several pounds I’ve gained over the last two days.
trollhattan
President Frog-on-Face has a nice ring to it.
jl
@chris: ‘Santa’? How old are you? Talking about Santa at your age, pretty marginal.
Merry Trumpas and a Happy new tax evasion cycle!
Edit: I was planning on avoiding Trump’s conversation with the kid on Santa Claus, but the radio news presented it me first thing when I woke up. Trump brought it up out of the blue. What a toxic weirdo. OTOH, if Trump did think the kid was too old to believe, and was gullible, why didn’t he try to sell her some Trump product? Vodka or something like that.
trollhattan
This reminds me of the Hiaasen book (Florida tie-in!) in which a character spent several chapters with a pitbull head latched onto his arm.
Miss Bianca
@germy: Sounds as good as any other meaning.
Meanwhile, poor heron!
Jim, Foolish Literalist
That was my thought. That would explain the lack of tweets today. IIRC Obama and Bush pulled off a couple of surprise landings in Afghanistan, but they were already traveling or said to be heading somewhere else.
ETA: can/do they put some kind of security gag order on the media? that would explain the lack of any reporting of the twitter rumors on the more mainstream outlets?
Fred Fnord
My nomination for best post of the year.
germy
@Miss Bianca: I feel sorry for the bullfrog. He was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Meanwhile, his spouse is waiting and wondering where he is. “Last time he didn’t come home he was drunk for three days!” she tells Tad, the oldest.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
odds that trump says something incredibly offensive and/or impulsively blabs classified information while visiting troops to regain some good press after Mattis disaster? Magic eight ball says…. Pretty damn good
MattF
B’ree deeep, he explained.
Martin
Nice writeup of Governor Moonbeam, who I contend is the best governor in the nation. His fearlessness in tackling big problems is unique, and leaves California functioning much more like a nation than a state.
JPL
@SiubhanDuinne: If true, he’s visiting the troops. Maybe this is the time he is finally …ah never mind.
dmsilev
Via TPM, in case anyone doubted where Sarah Huckabee Sanders got her winning personality from, here’s Dear Old Dad:
germy
I went to the DMV this morning to renew my driver’s license. Whole thing took about five minutes.
They were quick, competent and courteous.
Now let me try to contact my cable provider or worse yet my cell phone company. (Just to experience the … contrast)
And yet, in the RW fever swamps “gubmint bad, private enterprise good”
Duane
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: The heron bit off more than it could chew, as has Trumpov. The heron’s need to eat is understandable. Trumpov can choke on it.
germy
@dmsilev: Why do I suspect Mike boiled young Sarah’s beloved pet rabbit sometime during her childhood?
SiubhanDuinne
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
I honestly don’t know whether the secrecy is simply a matter of putting something over on the media, or out of security considerations. If, in fact, Trump is heading for the ME, I expect ALS will have something to say about it.
dmsilev
@germy: It would be irresponsible not to speculate.
Amir Khalid
@SiubhanDuinne:
An Air Force One flight to anywhere doesn’t seem to me as simple as calling Uber to get a car. You have to get the business all prepared that POTUS is travelling on, which includes fitting it into the schedules of some very important people. You have to assign people to the trip, prep the plane, etc. These aren’t trips made on short notice.
Ohio Mom
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: From a quick visit to google, it looks like this rumor’s source is Wikileaks. So consider the source.
I like imagining Trump’s on his way to defect, that there’s a nice little dacha being readied for him even as I type.
Not that I think this is at all likely, I just like to daydream big.
SiubhanDuinne
@germy:
Exactly what I was thinking. Who comes up with that kind of analogy just randomly?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@germy: maybe I’m unusually lucky but in the thirty-five years I’ve been a licensed driver the worst experience I’ve had was running in to renew my license while wearing a baseball cap over my too long and very messy hair. They made me take it off and I made a joke about it and the nice lady taking the picture said, in a tone that sounded like she wasn’t sure who she trying to convince, “Oh, you look fine, honey”
Just got the NYT alert that The Beast is in Iraq. Is there some kind of dark prophecy this fulfills? A return to Ur or Nineveh? One thing: The poll numbers they must have shown him to get him to do this must have been bad, and he’s going to be in a foul mood.
OldDave
@SiubhanDuinne:
Via Twitter: AF1 over Englandland.
JPL
He’s in Iraq with Melania
MattF
@Ohio Mom: Mar-a-Lago East.
germy
@dmsilev: I imagine it played out like this:
Her pet bunny disappeared one day. Frantic and tearful she asked her parents for help. They shrugged and said they’d keep a lookout, but told her she should understand that sometimes bunnies just “disappear.”
That night, at dinner, while Sarah is chewing her food her older brothers giggle and tell her she’s eating rabbit stew. She cries and implores her dad to tell them it isn’t true, but he joins into the general laughter.
From then on, Sarah’s heart hardens a bit more each day, until finally she finds herself at a podium defending this administration.
dmsilev
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
I guess now that the truth is out about his ‘bone spur’, the draft board was reconvened solely for the purpose of calling him up and shipping him out to the nearest war zone.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@germy: I’m confident the Huckabee house was a dark place for children
Kelly
@germy: Same for me the last time I went to the DMV. I’ll add that every Forest Service person I ever worked with has been reliable, hard working and cared deeply for our public lands.
SiubhanDuinne
@Amir Khalid:
No, but as Jim, Foolish Literalist pointed out, other Presidents (most recently GWB and Obama) traveled on more than one occasion to visit deployed troops, and the whole thing was kept out of media until after the visits had happened. There are protocols in place.
PaulWartenberg
The moral of the story, boys and girls, is to use utensils when you eat.
trollhattan
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
Yup. His avuncularity covers for something deep and vile. His dog-killing son is but one product.
JPL
@germy: Like father, like son, but Huck’s son was fired as a troop counselor because he killed a dog.
Roger Moore
@Amir Khalid:
Maybe, but probably not. Birds don’t use their nests as year-round homes. The nest is only used as a place for incubating eggs and raising young until they fledge. Once the young can travel with their parents, the family will stop using the nest. And great blue herons don’t mate for life; they typically choose a new mate every year. So unless it’s nesting season, and I suspect it’s early for that even in Florida, the bird may have neither a nest nor a mate to go home to.
Mnemosyne
@Martin:
IMO, Jerry did a good job because he had given up any ambition to be president and just concentrated on making California as strong as it could be.
I kind of wish there were more politicians like that, but it’s hard to tell an ambitious younger person to, like, stop being so ambitious and concentrate on their current job.
zhena gogolia
@SiubhanDuinne:
WaPo says he visited troops in Iraq. Lucky them.
Cheryl Rofer
@SiubhanDuinne:
Brachiator
@germy:
I guess I will have to go to a California DMV office to get a “Real ID,” but I will try to wait until it is clear what is required to get the stupid things.
I also have to renew my passport.
Doug R
Well, it is award season. Maybe the heron was trying for best actor: Kids in the Hall – Academy Awards
Brachiator
@Cheryl Rofer:
So, he got shamed into making a trip. I guess he is listening to somebody about some things that he needs to do so he doesn’t look like a total ass wipe.
germy
@Brachiator: In the renewal letter I received in the mail, they enclosed a card with a list of exactly what I’d need to bring if I wanted a Real ID, Enhanced or whatever. Didn’t you get a notification letter?
germy
@Brachiator: If you renew your passport, then why bother with the hassle of a Real ID? Your passport should cover any foreign or domestic flight requirements.
Ruviana
How does this work with the shutdown? I’ve really been wondering this. I’d assumed he couldn’t get to Mar-a-lago because AF1 was grounded but I guess not.
J R in WV
You would think that a critter dependent upon spearing food with its spear-like bill would learn really early in life how to get the food off its spear and into it’s mouth!?!?
Hope it doesn’t starve trying to get the frog off its face!
Trump goes to Iraq… where he is arrested for war crimes by Iranian Revolutionary Guards! One can hope. Turned over to The Hague ASAP!
Sarah PossumQueen story about her pet bunny is all too real, her parents and brothers must have been monsters to grow up with…
zhena gogolia
@Cheryl Rofer:
They stuck some poor African-American woman in the front. Love Melania’s combat boots. She’s always fashion-forward.
Gin & Tonic
@Brachiator: If you have a valid passport (and plan to keep current) then you have no need for a “Real ID.”
JPL
@Cheryl Rofer: There was another picture of him speaking to a group separately, and I assume it was at that time he spoke about the Wall, Comey and the Democrats.
Ohio Mom
Eh, not the first day dream of mine that did not come true.
That’s an interesting choice Melania made for footwear
JPL
@Brachiator:Did Rush call him?
Ohio Mom
If you look at that photo carefully, nobody in a uniform looks particularly thrilled. A lot of halfhearted smiles.
Mnemosyne
@Brachiator:
Google “California real ID checklist.” They put an interactive one on the DMV’s website. I will be bringing my certified birth certificate, Social Security card, and a bank statement or medical statement that shows my address.
It’s slightly more complicated if you’re a naturalized citizen or changed your name at any point because you need to bring those documents as well, but the list seems pretty complete.
VeniceRiley
RIP Sister Wendy Beckett. Everyone’s favorite art nun.
JPL
@JPL: So far we know he spoke about the Wall, and his decision to pull troops from Syria.
We are being taken advantage of yadda, yadda, yadda.
J R in WV
Here the DMV is pretty professional. When you come in you get a slip with a code on it, and there’s a board with now serving and the current codes on it for each window. Windows have different sets of functions.
This is at one of the larger DMV centers, the smaller ones are a little less formal, usually smaller crowds waiting for service. The big one in Charleston is closest, so I usually go there.
We can also get new license stickers and registration at the county courthouse, where you can also get a receipt for your taxes, which is required for any auto stuff, even an inspection. Gotta get the taxes paid to breathe! That costs a $0.25 extra for the Sheriff’s costs.
In the long ago there was only one site for all that statewide at the statehouse complex, and people made a living taking other people’s DMV payments and docs down to the statehouse… thank god that’s over. If you waited in the wrong line for an hour, standing there, all you got was a dirty look and a bark about “You need to be in line G, [asshole]!” Same if you didn’t have one out of 5 thing you needed, come back Tuesday and wait all over, only to learn about a 6th thing you were supposed to know you needed.
All that’s over with now, finally.
SiubhanDuinne
@JPL:
I think that was yesterday (or maybe even Xmas eve?), Skyping from the Oval. But I’ve tried not to follow it too closely, and could easily be wrong.
JPL
@SiubhanDuinne: From the visit earlier today. We are just now learning what he spoke to the troops about.
Wapiti
@Brachiator: I recently got a Real ID here in WA. They had a list of required items on their website.
John Revolta
Well I dunno about you jackals but ME, I’d sooner starve to death than to go home with a goddamn frog stuck on my face and have to hear about it for the rest of my natural life, thankyouverymuch.
trollhattan
@germy:
Who wants to carry their passport for domestic travel?
Brachiator
@Wapiti:
Here in California, there apparently is a problem. And the first Real IDs issued will not be valid in the future. Approximately 2.3 million IDs issued do not meet the federal standard.
This should have been simple. But apparently it wasn’t. This is the part I love
For some reason, the DMV says that they won’t have everything fixed until Spring 2019.
Spanky
“Incorrectly” is … incorrect. To say the least.
trollhattan
@Wapiti:
IIUC California initially required one proof of residence (e.g., utility bill) but the feds told them they need to require two. It was a pretty trivial thing but in a state of 40 million small can get big quickly.
Brachiator
@Mnemosyne:
See my comment #66. There are problems with the California system of giving the Real ID.
trollhattan
@Brachiator:
It has not been a good year for the Ca DMV.
Brachiator
@trollhattan:
It rarely is.
Thing is, the last time I had to renew my CA ID, I had little problem. Of course, I was on crutches and got to jump to the head of the line. But staff were courteous, helpful and everything went quickly.
But I pass by a DMV office in the morning during my commute. And there is a long line of people sitting and waiting to for the place to open. Some offices are great, others definitely not so great. And the Real ID thing is adding extra confusion.
ETA. The Real ID mess is like a frog stuck to a heron’s face.
germy
I had a weird dream last night that CBS’s Paula Reid was my girlfriend.
Nothing X-rated, mind you. It was just a dream where we were sitting together and she held my hand and I realized (in the dream) that she really liked me. Then we went for a walk together.
This is what a combination of egg nogg and my MIL’s rum cake does to my sleep architecture, apparently.
I haven’t told my wife.
Gwangung
I suspect Trump is headed to Florida after this, and not DC. He’s going to meet with people who paid big bucks for access on New Year’s. He’s missed the Xmas opportunity and doesn’t want to miss New Year’s.
Michael Cain
@germy:
My experience has been that when you go to the wireless or cable companies’ retail outlets you get much better service. Some of that may be that I can put on my “I’m a geezer and I can tie you up all day” face, and they have to solve my problem before they can go back to commission-generating sales.
zhena gogolia
@Ohio Mom:
That’s what it looked like to me. And the woman in front is laughing because it looks as if they dragooned her into standing there.
This regime has made me a bad, suspicious, cynical person.
MCA1
@Duane: Yes, and note that this is all happening in a swamp. The heron thought it could just swoop in and feast on unsuspecting frogs and other swamp dwellers, bit off more than it could fit in its mouth, and is now unable to detach from, and being attacked by, the very thing it thought it would so easy to conquer. I hope the hawk talons the heron’s eyes out and leaves it writhing on the ground blind and in agony, and the next day there are vultures and feral hogs taking turns poking around at its flesh.
Mnemosyne
@Brachiator:
I realize that it’s hoop-jumping, but why the fuck are two forms of residency proof required? What is the purpose? Are there really huge numbers of terrorists out there who have a bank statement with their address but not a car insurance statement so we’re totally going to catch them that way?
I’ll bring 2 forms to my appointment in February, but I have to admit, I’m with the CA DMV on this. It’s a ridiculous requirement.
germy
@Mnemosyne: Security theater.
Mnemosyne
@Brachiator:
Okay, I actually found the text of the REAL ID legislation on the DHS website. The law says that the requirements are:
(A) A photo identity document or a non-photo document that includes the person’s full legal name and date of birth
(B) Documentation showing the person’s date of birth
(C) Proof of the person’s social security number or verification that they are not eligible for one
(D) Documentation showing the person’s name and address of principal residence
Nothing there about having to show 2 separate proofs of residence. One wonders who came up with that requirement and when, because it’s not part of the law as passed.
Ryan
Try as she might to help Trump get the cameras out of the room before their discussion last week, Nancy could stop Trump insisted posturing to feed his base and failed in the process?
Gin & Tonic
@trollhattan: If you have a Global Entry ID, that is an acceptable substitute as I have found at several TSA checks. And it’s the size and shape of a credit card/driver’s license.
Mike in NC
Trump isn’t flying halfway around the world just for a mere photo op with the troops. He’ll lie his fat orange face off about how much winning he had in 2018, before making a side trip to Moscow or Riyadh to grovel with one of his favorite dictators. Our tax dollars at work.
FlyingToaster
@trollhattan: Me & mine. I’ve been doing it since 2004. I also have WarriorGirl’s birth certificate tucked in her cover, so that the TSA can’t separate us.
Brachiator
@Mnemosyne: I listened to a couple of pointlessly confusing news stories over the weekend. Right now, we have dueling agencies and consumers who insist that they know what the rules are.
Here is what is currently at the California DMV site:
I’m waiting for the feds to come up with new, conflicting rules.
Gin & Tonic
Apparently the DJIA liked that Trump left the country.
Ruckus
@dmsilev:
Asshole doesn’t fall far from the asshole.
Van Buren
Heron = herren =men’s
Bullfrog is a polite way of saying bullshit
It has to do with someone of German ancestry who has bullshit coming out of his mouth.
Who that could be, Lord knows.
Ruckus
@Brachiator:
Way too late for him not to look like an asswipe, used.
Mnemosyne
@Brachiator:
Yeah, pretty much. The DHS’s own website doesn’t say that 2 forms of proof of residency are required, except they are for California, because they sent an email to the state DMV to say so. What?
Ruckus
@J R in WV:
I’m not willing to give her the freebie that it was her father and brothers alone. She’s a horrible person in her own right. She didn’t get there because she’s working for the worst human being, she’s working for the worst human being because of who she is.
Ruckus
@trollhattan:
I used to use my passport all the time for travel, domestic and foreign. Never got hassled when I did.
Ruckus
@Michael Cain:
I just changed my cell service and getting the phone working with the new service took two trips to the retail store, 3 clerks, and my total time was over 6 hours.
The DMV has always been a lot faster.
Now this could also be the fact that it was my phone. I’ve developed a theory that there are some people who just have to wait for everything. I’m in that group.
Miss Bianca
@MCA1: You seem nice.
Mnemosyne
@Brachiator:
Found a link: California was following Wisconsin’s practice. Apparently Wisconsin is allowed to request only 1 residence document and use the Post Office for the second document, but California is not because shut up, that’s why. I looked at the WI DMV site and, yep, you only have to provide 1 residence document.
Also, the rules were issued by the Bush-era DHS a couple of days after Obama was inaugurated, so there’s a couple of fuck-yous to the states in there.
Ruckus
@germy:
Since Sept 2001. Don’t have to actually do anything constructive, just annoy everyone – job done.
zhena gogolia
@Miss Bianca:
I believe it’s an allegory of DJT, not really animus toward the heron.
Miss Bianca
@zhena gogolia: Boy, I hope so, because YOW! That was some animus!
It is entirely possible that my snark meter needs a tune-up.
Dorothy A. Winsor
When I read the headline for this post, I thought it was going to be about the Trump administration.
Ladyraxterinok
@Van Buren: Brother said old timers in the mi,itary stationed in
Germany played this trick on newbies who worried about finding the correct restroom in a bar.
It ‘s simple–Herren for the women (hers, Herren)
AND–Damen for the men (the men, Damen)
Frankensteinbeck
@Mike in NC:
Bear in mind, he is desperate to stop cable news from talking about how he’s an incompetent who’s destroying the economy with a shutdown confrontation everyone knows he’s going to lose. Oh, and that he’s so stupid and mean he fucked up the Christmas ‘phone calls to children’ tradition. This gets him away from that torture and gives him a chance to show how Presidential he is.
debbie
@Brachiator:
Hmm. Passive punishment for being California?
debbie
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
I think the trip was a very expensive means of distraction. And maybe also last minute. If not, I am surprised he didn’t shoot his mouth off about it.
Brachiator
@debbie:
Ha! Wouldn’t surprise me.