Floriduh Man!, Floriduh Woman!, And Floriduh Toddler! Send 2017 Out With A Bang Or A Whimper

In the waning moments of 2017 we check in one last time with Floriduh Man! to see what he’s been up to at the end of this year.

First up we have a naked polo player.


A polo player was arrested after he entered another man’s home, stripped naked and then climbed into bed, Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office deputies said.

Jason Crowder, 29, was arrested Saturday in Wellington on charges of burglary and resisting arrest with violence.

The resident told deputies Crowder entered his home through an unlocked door, walked upstairs to the bedroom and then closed the door.

According to the arrest report, deputies were called and entered the bedroom, where they found Crowder naked in bed under a sheet.

Deputies said Crowder refused numerous commands to put on his clothes and get out of bed, so they attempted to forcibly remove him, but he kept flailing his arms in resistance.

Eventually, deputies said they were able to pull him out of bed, but not without a struggle.

Crowder’s speech was slurred and he appeared to be under the influence of alcohol, the report stated.

Can another Floriduh Man! outdo our naked polo player? Of course he can!!!!!

CBS An Orlando, Florida man is facing charges after he was found masturbating in a baby’s nursery closet.

Orange County police say the mother was getting her three month old baby girl ready for daycare when she opened the closet door and found the man.

The mother screamed for her fiancé and put herself in front of the doorway to stop the man from fleeing.

The fiancé said he arrived to find the man completely naked.
The suspect allegedly told him that he was homeless and then put his hands up.

The father of the child told police he began hitting the man to protect his daughter and two-year old son.

According to the police report, the suspect refused to leave the house, and the fiancé said he ran to the kitchen and got a knife.
But by the time he returned, the suspect ran to the garage and jumped a fence.

The suspect was later arrested and denied masturbating inside the home and told police he could not remember how he had gotten into the home.

Officials say that while the suspect was in the police interview room, he began touching and exposing himself by lowering his pants.
The man faces charges related to exposing himself and burglary.

Finally, or at least until tomorrow when various local Florida police departments update their arrests from tonight, we end with a Floriduh Man! with a bad attitude, poor impulse control, and a case of the munchies.

 – A Florida man was charged with assaulting his girlfriend over who ate the last chocolate chip cookie, police say.

Port St. Lucie police responded to their home on Aster Road on December 14. Richard Anthony Hessic told police he was upset when he discovered someone ate the last chocolate chip cookie and that his girlfriend was not taking him seriously.

His girlfriend said she joked with him about reviewing surveillance cameras to determine who ate the cookie, and did not want to argue “over something so petty,” so she offered to purchase more cookies, according to his affidavit.

After, she went to take a shower, and he followed her into the bathroom. “He felt she was blowing him off so he ripped down the shower curtain,” his affidavit read, “and punched her on the left side of her face.”

Police say they didn’t notice any swelling or bruising on the victim’s face.

Hessic was arrested and charged with battery.

But what about Floriduh Woman!? We have an update on the Floriduh Woman! charged with DUI for equestrianism while drunk.

(BARTOW, Fla.) — A Florida judge says a sheriff’s office must retain custody of a horse whose owner was charged with drunken driving while riding the animal.

In a report by The Ledger , Polk County Judge Sharon Franklin said 53-year-old Donna Byrne was unfit to care for the horse. Franklin also said Byrne must complete treatment for alcohol addiction.

Byrne was arrested Nov. 2 after riding her horse down a highway. Police said her blood-alcohol level twice Florida’s legal limit.

Byrne’s attorney, Craig Whisenhunt, says he will revisit the custody issue at a Jan. 11 hearing regarding additional pending charges of disorderly intoxication, animal endangerment and culpable negligence.

Whisenhunt questions whether the charges applied to Byrne, saying she had not been disorderly and was a pedestrian under the law.

We also have a Floriduh Woman! who is auditioning for the role in the new Grinch movie.

A 61-year-old Florida woman was arrested after deputies said she became a bit Grinch-like just days before Christmas.

The Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office said Deborah Margaret McClung helped herself to a mailman’s Christmas card and his $25 cash.

When they caught up with McClung, she had envelopes and Amazon packages from 20 other residences, according to a sheriff’s news release.

The Clearwater woman was arrested after around noon Friday when a 74-year-old homeowner confronted McClung in her laundry room.

Roseanne Chiaramonte told deputies that she left the card on her sliding-glass door and as she went into her laundry room, she found a strange woman standing there red-handed, according to the release.

When asked what she was doing, the sheriff’s release said that McClung replied, “The mailman does not come down here; I will bring it to him.”

McClung returned the card and cash before driving off in a Toyota Solaris.

The following day, deputies noticed the car in the same area, conducted a traffic stop and found the stolen stash inside her car. They also collected Amazon packages addressed to other people.

McClung admitted to the crimes, the release stated. She was charged with burglary to an occupied structure as well as violation of probation grand theft. Additional grand theft charges are probable.

 So if you live in Clearwater, Safety Harbor, Palm Harbor, Dunedin, and/or Oldsmar you may want to check with the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Department to see if they have your missing Christmas gift from Amazon.
And we’ll end with a brawl involving six Floriduh Women! and one Floriduh Toddler! who was clearly fighting above her weight class.

What lifts a mall brawl above the mundane yapping-and-slapping? How about stepping away from the brawl to bring a toddler into the action?

That’s what one woman did during a Sunday donnybrook at Fort Myers’ Edison Mall captured on video by David Milburn.

The video opens with at least four women pounding and punching one woman turtling to protect herself. The attacked woman sinks to the ground, still in cover-up mode from repeated punches and kicks.

One of the women ganging up on her, a blue-shirted woman wearing what appears to be a raspberry beret, stops punching and walks off screen. She returns to the fray pushing a toddler in a plastic stroller shaped like a car.

As the attacked woman starts to rise, the stroller pusher stops to deliver a side kick to the attacked woman’s face.

The kung fu moment momentarily unbalanced and stunned the woman who was attacked, but she popped back up to go after Bruce Lee-in-a-beret. The woman who kicked her retreated, leaving the bewildered child sitting in the stroller alone.

She eventually returned to scoop the child out of the stroller and disappear into Victoria’s Secret as the brawl broke up.

According to the Fort Myers News-Press, a statement from Fort Myers police Capt. Jay Rodriguez said, “Upon arrival, the incident had already dissipated and police did not find a confrontation going on. Approximately two hours later police were called back to the mall in reference to apparent injuries that occurred previously and spoke to complainants.”

A report of simple battery was filed. The investigation remains open.

Stay frosty! Open thread! And a happy and healthy New Year to you all!

84 replies
  1. 1

    Who are your choices for Hack List 2017? Here’s a partial list of mine, in no particular order:
    •Dean Baquet*
    •James Bennet
    •Andrew Lack/Stephen Burke
    •Chris Chinchilla
    •Glenn Greenwald/Zaid Jilani
    •Patrick Lawrence Smith
    •Megyn Kelly
    •Jack Shafer
    •Louise Mensch
    •Michael Tracey/Nomiki Konst

    *Putting HaberThrush in with Baquet, as they’re his subordinates.

  2. 2
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    In defense of the polo player, polo players tend to be weird.

  3. 3
    Ruckus says:

    I know everywhere has stories of people who just don’t quite fit into polite society. But FL seems to have maybe more than it’s share? I may figure out how to fit into polite society one day if I can ever find it. Maybe I don’t want to live in a society that will have me for a member.

  4. 4
    debbie says:

    It’s almost overwhelming! What the hell is in the water down there?

  5. 5
    Walker says:


    Open records laws that allow journalists to see every police report recorded. I am sure we would see the same in other states if they had similar records laws.

  6. 6
    Mary G says:

    Don’t Lowes or Home Depot have any stores in Florida so these people can get locks for their doors? It really cuts down on strangers coming in.

    @Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD): Chinchilla is in a category of his own. And of course DoubtThat, Stephens and Brooks on the NYT opinion page are so bad they don’t fit under Bacquet. Howard Kurtz has gone full metal wingnut since going to Fox.

    Happy New Year, Adam and everyone!

  7. 7
    debbie says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    i exercised polo ponies for the local club back when I was in high school. The players weren’t weird like that guy. A little drunken, maybe.

  8. 8
    The Moar You Know says:

    When I was a kid, my family used to visit Panama City every year. Incredible ocean, incredible beaches, and the most unpleasant people I have ever met. Thieves, weirdos and drunks.

    And that’s the nice part of Florida. Inland is scary.

  9. 9
    debbie says:


    Maybe, but I think the weather plays a significant role.

  10. 10
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Ruckus: Part of it is the sunshine laws here in Florida. It allows the various local newspapers to get quick access to police arrest logs and details of the arrests. The rest of it is the humidity.

  11. 11
    Schlemazel says:

    Sorry, I don’t buy it. From my time living there I think the state attracts certain types of people. The end result of which is that they get these sorts of events in numbers greater that their population would indicate.

  12. 12
    laura says:

    I’m concerned that floriduh man/woman lacks a think/do filter, but they make it up with a surfeit of hold my beer brio and what could possibly go wrong personal responsibility.

  13. 13
    oatler. says:

    Epcot Center is quite nice except for the pimps and the CHUDs.

  14. 14

    @Mary G: Those three do fit under Bennet, however.

  15. 15
    Mike J says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: When they found him in bed why didn’t they just chukker him out?

    I’ll get me coat.

  16. 16

    @oatler.: You gotta deal with the pimps and the CHUDS, by hand, G / Plus the Gorilla Mindset Family

  17. 17
    Another Scott says:

    HNY Adam and to your crew. Here’s hoping that 2018 is better for you, and the rest of us!


  18. 18
    Yutsano says:

    @Ruckus: Carl Hiaasen still makes a living writing about the quirks and vagarities of his home. The fact they all have plausibility just adds to the character.

  19. 19
    NotMax says:

    A full-throated “adios'” to this Edsel Vega Pinto Yugo of a year.

  20. 20
    eclare says:

    Just gave my dog a second sedative because of fireworks and gunfire. I do it on Halloween also, it’s ok, physically, but I detest other people making me have to do it.

  21. 21
    Schlemazel says:

    Happy New Year to our friends on the East side of the US, Lets hope that 17 was the bottom & it is all up from here

  22. 22
    mdblanche says:

    Should auld acquaintance be forgot…

  23. 23
    Mnemosyne says:

    Since half of us are watching the Thin Man marathon, keep an eye out for this upcoming dialogue scene:

    Nick Charles: [Nick finds Nora at a table surrounded by a crowd of suitors] Now, Mommy, you know better than to come to place like this, your first day out of bed. What if the health officers find out? They’ll put you right back in quarantine.
    Nora Charles: I won’t stay in quarantine! I don’t care who catches it.
    [the suitors quickly leave]

  24. 24
    frosty says:

    Stay Frosty!!! Oh, you didn’t, with all of us east and midwest jackals dealing with temps in the single digits at best! I hope it gets into the 40s in FL and you can’t find your knit hat and parka.*

    * Actual scene at the campsite with our Florida friends in February a couple of years ago.

  25. 25
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Another Scott: Let’s hope so!

  26. 26

    Щедрик, щедрик, щедрівочка,
    Прилетіла ластівочка

  27. 27
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @eclare: Mine have their anti-anxiety shirts on, have had a celebratory Himalayan yak milk cheese chew apiece, and are, by and large chilling despite the fireworks.

  28. 28
    Yutsano says:

    @Adam L Silverman: Border collie has already commenced freak-out.

    Happy New Year Adam!

  29. 29
    Suzanne says:

    My douchebag father lives in Port St. Lucie. I was rather hoping that someone stole his chocolate chip cookie.

  30. 30
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @debbie: A little drunken can spin out to weird.

  31. 31
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @frosty: We are due for lows in the low to mid 30s all week with highs in the low 50s to low 60s.

  32. 32
    Soprano2 says:

    I asked my polo-playing friends on FB if they know that man. They might, the polo world isn’t that big.

  33. 33
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Yutsano: A happy and healthy New Year to you too!

  34. 34
    Ruckus says:

    @Adam L Silverman:
    They always blame the humidity. Always.
    It is possible that it has shorted out the neurons swimming around in there but I think there must be something else going on.
    Sure the open record laws don’t help but do they have to take that as a challenge? Is the FL line, “Hold my beer and see if I can make the police report!”? Because it sure seems like it.

  35. 35
    FlyingToaster says:


    A full-throated “adios’” to this Edsel Vega Pinto Yugo of a year.

    No, a Trabi. Definitely a Trabi of a year.

  36. 36
    Ruckus says:

    @Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD):
    I don’t think google translate hit that one out of the park.
    What you mean Willis?

  37. 37
    Suzanne says:

    My Luna is upset by the fireworks going off down the street. She spent some time trembling and coming over for snuggles. I’m wondering if I should take her for a walk or not.

  38. 38
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Suzanne: I can make a call.//

  39. 39

    @Ruckus: The opening lyrics to “Shchedryk,” a Ukrainian New Year’s carol and the original lyrics for the “Carol of the Bells” melody.

  40. 40
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD): Why did you do that? Why make it hard on people? I am too tired to go to Google Trans., but you did post in Cyrillic. You are so talented. Golly.

  41. 41
    Ruckus says:

    I answered you in the previous thread and was looking for my answer in this thread because of this post. Are you trying to screw with us or just celebrating the last day of this Yugo year?

  42. 42
    frosty says:

    @Adam L Silverman: My friends will be digging out their gear. Bonus fun fact: they’re from Buffalo (via DC and Oregon).

  43. 43
    Ruckus says:

    @Butthurt Jordan Trombone (fka XTPD):
    Google got Ukraine but after that lost the plot completely.

  44. 44
  45. 45
    WaterGirl says:

    @Suzanne: Saw your comments about the in-laws coming to visit soon. Am I crazy, or was there some sort of episode with your MIL years back where she called you a cow? Or you called her a cow? I don’t recall the details, but I do recall that whatever interaction she had had with you was absolutely horrible.

    How “nice” the they are visiting again.

  46. 46
    mainmata says:

    @debbie: There are good people in FL among them my retired mother just as there are good people in TX but they are simply overwhelmed by ignoramuses and reactionaries, which is why our society is what it is.

  47. 47
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @frosty: People’s blood thins quickly once they move to Florida. I’m from Florida and unless it gets really, really cold, I’m not bothered by the cold other than if it is really cold and really dry the dry part bothers me. But hot and humid annoy me. It’s why I’m never happy when I wind up on an assignment down here and why I’m always looking for a billet back up north.

  48. 48
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Adam L Silverman: This is wonderful.

  49. 49
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: It is.

  50. 50
    frosty says:

    @Adam L Silverman: I was the same as you and then I got Old. Heat’s not a problem, I can deal with (Maryland) humidity but I’m done with being cold. Not done enough to move south, but enough to hit the road.

    ETA: Hope you get the billet you want soon. Maybe in 2018 even.

  51. 51
    Ruckus says:

    @Adam L Silverman:
    Very nice.
    Along the same line.
    Sometimes when I’m really feeling in the shit I just play this.

  52. 52
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @frosty: Thanks. I’m hoping so too.

  53. 53
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Ruckus: That’s nice too.

  54. 54
    Gvg says:

    I have lived in Florida almost all my life. It’s normal boring and I mostly meet people like this in newspaper only. Population is is 20 million plus so you can find anything here. I have to read 100’s of academic progress financial aid petitions a year so I do know of people that have these kind of problems in real life but it’s still a tiny percent of a huge population.

  55. 55

    @mainmata: Given that it did go for Obama both times, the fight against reactionaries isn’t as Sisyphean as Texas.’

    We should cede the Redneck Riviera to Alabama.

  56. 56
    Jager says:


    As my buddy Roger said about Florida a long time ago, “A lotta shit washes up on the beach.”

  57. 57
    Mike J says:


    I know everywhere has stories of people who just don’t quite fit into polite society. But FL seems to have maybe more than it’s share?

    Lots of people got lured there by get rich quick schemes in the early 20th century. The descendants of the con men and the descendants of the people who thought they could get rich quick (you can’t cheat an honest man) are all living there now.

  58. 58
    Ruckus says:

    BTW Tonight I’m having a hard time.
    I was going to wait till the VA officially diagnoses what I have but I need to talk about this with someone. On Dec 18th my neuro doc told me that while he’s going to hold off diagnosis for a bit I should study up on Parkinson’s because he’s pretty sure that’s what I’ve got. It fits and I bet this was his way of breaking it to me as gently as possible. Along with the issues that led to the angiogram and the fun I’ve had with dealing with the abnormal side effects, I’m a bit of a wreck. I thought I had at least an outline of a plan for retirement, now what? Planning consists of what time do I get up in the morning and that’s as far as it goes. Yeah, one day at a time and all that, and I’ve been expecting something like this for a number of years that the docs have been watching. It’s still a kick in the gonads. I have a couple of acquaintances whose mom had Parkinson’s, a friend has ALS, my dad had a bad case of Alzheimer’s so I’m at least acquainted with degenerative neurological diseases, maybe that’s what’s kicking my ass. I don’t want to feel sorry for myself but I have no idea what the future holds. None of us really do of course but at least some know where they’d like it to go. I got nothing. My feet feel like I’ve got gestapo shoes on.

  59. 59
    Ruckus says:

    I think I know him. Or I’ve at least met his twin brother.

  60. 60
    WaterGirl says:

    @Ruckus: Hey Ruckus. From what you had told us a couple of weeks ago, I had wondered if you were potentially looking at Parkinson’s or ALS, but I was hoping it wasn’t so. I wish there was something I could say to make the future seem less daunting in the face of this kick in the teeth diagnosis.

    I can say that you are a frequent source of wisdom and inspiration here on Balloon Juice, and I very much appreciate the person you are.

  61. 61
    Ruckus says:

    I know a number of people who live in FL, none of whom are on this blog as far as I know. They are, in the normal range of humans. They work, they live, they enjoy they have sorrow. I know assholes from other states as well so I know this is not just FL. But the weather lets those in FL get outside pretty much year round with minimal clothes on and that can be a problem. There’s more to prove to someone and more people watching. For those with a highly active showoff gene you add beer and BAM you’ve got a problem. Then there are the spring breakers. Hormones, beer, warmish weather……….

  62. 62
    NotMax says:


    Then there are the spring breakers. Hormones, beer, warmish weather……….

    Nuthin’ new there


  63. 63
    WaterGirl says:

    @Ruckus: Tried to stay up in case you wanted to talk, but I am so tired that I can barely keep my eyes open so I am heading to bed. See you tomorrow. WG

  64. 64
    Ruckus says:

    Thank you very much.
    They were looking at MS 5 yrs ago but have ruled that out, it just doesn’t fit. But more symptoms have reared their ugly heads and that starts setting the direction. Docs have to make it a certain way down the road before they can commit because there really are only subjective tests for a lot of this, especially Parkinson’s and they’d like to be as sure as possible. ALS really doesn’t fit either and as far as I know has never even been considered. And either MS or especially ALS are not as much fun as Parkinson’s. It’s possible to have a decent life for a while, not so with ALS especially. That’s nasty stuff.
    Also they haven’t diagnosed yet, at this point it’s still conjecture, pretty solid conjecture but that’s still as far as they will go. I just need to keep my head above water and keep going. That’s my part of this deal, fight like it matters, because it does.

  65. 65
    ruemara says:

    Another amazing episode of WTFloriduh.

  66. 66
    Yutsano says:

    @Ruckus: *hug*
    I hope it comes back as bearable news. And I will say that the advances they have made with Parkinson’s are amazing.

  67. 67
    Mary G says:

    @Ruckus: That’s awful. You have enough to deal with already.

  68. 68
    Mnemosyne says:


    I’m so sorry. I don’t know much about any of those diseases, but if you have to choose from that buffet of horrible, I think Parkinson’s may be the least horrible. And at least you have the VA for your healthcare.

  69. 69
    Suzanne says:

    @Ruckus: Ohhhhh Ruckus. I have no words of wisdom. But I have hugs, best wishes, a listening ear, and bourbon. I hope 2018 gets better for you. We’re all here in the ether, either way.

  70. 70
    Suzanne says:

    @WaterGirl: My MIL didn’t call me a cow exactly. Instead, she made some comment right after Spawn the Younger was born about pregnant and nursing women and being fat so one can produce milk. Or something. It was like seven years ago, I don’t remember exactly. It was not intended to be hurtful but it was sure AF insensitive to say to someone who just had a baby.

  71. 71
    Ruckus says:

    The advances are also the reason the doc wanted me to study up. Over the last couple of years we have had a few discussions of how things go and differing meds and the side effects. He understands that I’m hands on and work better with knowledge.
    @Mary G:
    Mary, a lot of what I’m dealing with is why they went there in the first place. None of this is cut and dried. Each case is a bit different, and reacts differently to different meds. There are some subjective standards with various traits of it but the range of acceptable is still pretty wide. And then when a decision/diagnosis is made, they can choose which of the very few meds to use. Some of the traits determine what course to follow and that is also a reason for not being able to give a test and read the results. Also they need to see trait progression so that they can see as much as possible and tell if the meds are doing anything.
    And yes the VA seems to be a good place as any to be treated at. Once they decide to treat you they go all in. So they may be a bit tentative at first but when they go, they go all out and with the latest thinking. A lot of medical research is done at the VA, so our “friends” cutting that back really can have detrimental effect. And might just piss off a lot of people they thought were their friends. Couldn’t happen to a nicer bunch of assholes. There, that helped a bit. Get pissed, get them thrown out on their asses. Plunder and steal will you? Let’s see what the real bosses have to say about that.

  72. 72
    patrick II says:

    Fresh, home made chocolate chips I might understand, but hitting a girl over store-bought just seems wrong.

  73. 73
    amygdala says:

    @Ruckus: It may be time to sick a bunch of jackals on the universe, which has been dishing out an inordinate amount of grief to you of late.

    A troubling diagnosis is hard, more so when there is uncertainty. Sometimes it can help to embrace the scariest outcome and then ask, “Ok, then what?” I never worked at a VA, but do know that they provide top-notch Parkinson’s care, with access to state-of-the-art treatments, including brain stimulation that sounds like crazy sci-fi, but can be very effective. It’s important to have access to expert, multidisciplinary care, and the VA does this for Parkinson’s like few other places.

    There are lots of medications available to manage particular symptoms, with new ones under study all the time. The trial and error aspect can be tiring, but your docs will teach you to gauge efficacy. They’ll have to coordinate with your cardiologist, PCP etc. to make sure all your medications get along. And they’ll get you set up with PT and such, when you need it.

    Important point is one you alluded to about ALS–that we always hope the progression will be slow, but that it often is not. Parkinson’s, by contrast, can vary. I’ve taken care of patients who would stay stable for years at a time. Until the dust settles with all of this, I’m sure my fellow jackals will join me in fervent wishes, if the diagnosis holds up, that you’ll be someone for whom it’s annoying, but follows a stable course.

  74. 74
    Mary G says:

    @Ruckus: @amygdala: I have been there. It took almost five years of maybe it’s lupus, maybe it’s gout, maybe it’s rheumatoid arthritis when my joints first went to hell in my early twenties. The blood chemistry doesn’t fit any of them exactly and my first rheumatologist, great as he was, remained convinced that I had a rare orphan variety of immune disease, which gave my managed care insurance the excuse to deny any expensive treatments. It was frustrating beyond belief.

    I finally went to a big time guy in Beverly Hills who told me it was closest to RA than anything else, so it’s RA, and he was setting up a clinical trial for a new drug better than the one I was trying to get, so it ended up working out. But I shed a lot of tears on my cat and did a lot of screaming in my car along the way, so I can relate.

  75. 75
    patrick II says:

    Here is a link to Michael J Fox with Cold Play playing Johnnie B.Goode. You can feel the love coming at him. I admire him more than I can describe. Like others here , I have nothing to brilliant to say , but wish you well and show you that with Michael there is a person with Parkinson’s who lives life to the fullest. I don’t mean to minimize the struggle but merely show someone who has struggled and finds his way through.

  76. 76
    Ruckus says:

    Appreciate this from a professional.
    My friend with ALS has it bad. He is at best a very small shadow of himself. His son, whom I’ve never met, has as far as I can tell, gone way, way beyond anything I’ve ever seen. But his dad, while cheerful is physically, a disaster. Ten yrs ago you’d not have known anything was wrong. My dad’s Alzheimer’s went on from first symptoms to passing for 20 yrs. Dad was a strong old coot and so it took a lot of time for the disease to take him down. I’ve known of people who lasted only 6-7 yrs from first symptoms. These things are just a crap shoot. That said Parkinson’s seems to be the one to have if you have a choice. Of course you’d choose not to have the dementia to go along with it. Right now they see no evidence of that.
    You are right about the VA, it is a large bureaucracy, sometimes the rules/procedures can make you scream but by far most of the people are first rate. And because of the patients they see a lot of diseases of old people and a lot of neurological issues. There are safeguards about medications and a system to watch for dangerous interactions. The pharmacy just kicked a prescription that I have years of experience with because of my changing health. It sucks, it was the most effective med for one issue that I’ve had for decades but better it gets kicked than I get dead.
    Anyway my main concern is the speed at which some of my symptoms have progressed, or at least at the speed it feels like they have.
    docs will teach you to gauge efficacy because I study and understand a bit of the risks and of what the meds are supposed to do I’m pretty good at this already. It ‘s handy to still be able to be one’s own advocate because even with good docs a good strong advocate is necessary. Most docs are good and will listen but some are full of themselves and “know” what you tell them is just wrong. I’ve had one of those in 5 yrs, but I stood up for myself and he took himself off my case. I’m more worried about what happens when I can no longer do this. But then that will always be the case as we get older.

  77. 77
    Tehanu says:

    @Ruckus: So sorry to hear this, but don’t despair. My late father-in-law had Parkinson’s and he coped with it just fine for many years. Of course I realize everyone is different, but it isn’t totally hopeless and there is support. I wish you the very best for 2018 and many subsequent years.

  78. 78
    Ruckus says:

    @Mary G:
    I know you’ve had issues and have struggled a lot. I’ve done the sitting in my car pounding on the steering wheel and afraid to drive because I might aim at, OK it was my boss. I’m just glad I have a modicum of humanity and quit the job rather than run him over or take his head off with a baseball bat. Right now it’s feeling a bit run over, as in overwhelmed, a bit depressed, which is understandably part of the disease, and a bit of a shock, even though I’ve been expecting something every time I see one of the neuro gods. To actually hear it is as I said a kick in the gonads. It doesn’t matter that I’ve been expecting something, it’s still a shock.
    @patrick II:
    Look, we all end up in the same place, few of us have what one might call a perfect ride getting there, I know people who have issues and have had a far worse trip than it is probable that I will have, but we all know that life is personal. We add people, we add trinkets, but at the end of the day it boils down to, it’s personal. We can make it worse by being an ass, we can make it easier by not being one, but still, it’s personal. All of our lives start to revolve around whatever this major issue is, be it Parkinson’s, or RA or whatever, or just time. It can consume us if we let it, some times it consumes us no matter how hard we try. But deal with us it will, whatever our special bit of hell is, it’s the ride not the destination. Make the ride count, make it positive, that’s the best we can do.
    Some have said over the centuries that the mark of a person is what they do when the chips are down, how do they act under fire. It’s not the fuel for the fire that’s important, it’s the way you act, the way you react that is. That really is our humanity.

    Thank you all, letting me vent, giving me a shoulder to do it on. I’d bet I’ll be back for more rounds, but if nothing else this has allowed me to clarify a few things for myself.

  79. 79
    Another Scott says:

    @Ruckus: I’m very sorry, Ruckus. :-(

    Here’s hoping for the best!

    We just found out yesterday that a former colleague who recently gave up her STEM career to go to law school (to eventually be an elder-care lawyer) was not long ago diagnosed with MS. She’s brilliant, friendly, empathetic, beautiful, and in her 30s. Her symptoms are well controlled now, but nobody knows what the future holds. :-(

    Medical progress is slower than we want, and they still really don’t understand how our bodies (and medications) work very well at all yet, but they are indeed making progress.

    Hang in there, and keep us in the loop.


  80. 80
    patrick ii says:

    @Ruckus: I meant to give you helpful advice, instead you give me some. Well said.

  81. 81
    Ksmiami says:

    @Mike J: not to mention drug deals, mob money and a get rich quick mentality- the state is beautiful- the people are pretty slimy

  82. 82
    eschneider says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: No we’re not. Ok, maybe half are weird. Also, I’m pretty sure that polo player’s not an authentic Florida Man. Name sounds way too familiar. :0

  83. 83
    Ruckus says:

    @Another Scott:
    30 and MS? Damn. Tell her something I heard long ago and have been trying to do my entire life.
    “Don’t let the bastards win.”
    I’ve talked about her before but my classmate who had polio, Janet has been and continues to be an inspiration to me. Janet took crap from idiot kids. She walked on with her crutches. She worked hard and did well in school. She took crap from idiot kids. She walked into our 10 yr reunion without crutches and with her head held high. It was an honor to have known her, to learn from her. She personifies this saying to the max.
    I met a man when I was 14-15 yrs old, worked for my dad, Richard. He is a black bear of a man, built like a defensive lineman, but gentle as a kitten, he taught me humanity and dignity when it would have been understandable that he would have none. He was a friend and a mentor and it was an honor to have known him. He personifies this saying to the max.
    The bastards may be many, the road winding and rough, but it’s what we make of it that is important.
    Scott, have her back, she will need that. Support her, pick her up when she falls, hold her hand if or when she asks or needs it. One can never have too much of that.

  84. 84
    No One You Know says:

    @Ruckus: Hey, Ruckus. Hug, first. I hang on to the idea that the only thing that I really have is today. Making the best use of that is what I can do for tomorrow. And the effort to do that may inspire some to help along the way.

    A and sometimes it just sucks in a shockingly bad way.

    A friend of mine told me long ago that he didn’t believe in retirement. Lost mobility in one arm, I forget why. He told me that the “one day at a time” thing felt like falling forward, but it was the forward he could manage. And, falling forward isn’t the same as falling down.

    Hugs again.

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