Twitter Games

This has been fun.






87 replies
  1. 1
    Corner Stone says:

    You had a couple good points but went waaayyy off the rails on most of them.

  2. 2
    rikyrah says:

    Stanley Kubrick ‘s movies give me a headache.

  3. 3
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    What are we supposed to do with it here?

  4. 4
    Ksmiami says:

    So The gos has put up an entry detailing what Trump said to one of the Green Beret widows- this ahole has to go now-

  5. 5
    misterpuff says:

    Cole, you forgot:

    Your Favorite band Sucks.

    Your favorite Sportsball Team Sucks (This goes double for Pittsburgh and Boston teams)

  6. 6
    Mary G says:

    I am exhausted from reading them all. Most people had seven or eight and you are closing in on triple digits soon.

  7. 7
    Mnemosyne says:

    @rikyrah:

    I like some of them, but not all. 2001 puts me to sleep, but I like Dr. Strangelove.

  8. 8
    Trentrunner says:

    “He knew what he signed up for…”

    Yup. We sure did.

  9. 9
    West of the Rockies (been a while) says:

    @rikyrah:

    Hey, Doc, it hurts when I go like this….

  10. 10
    West of the Rockies (been a while) says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    How’s your knee?

  11. 11
    Corner Stone says:

    @West of the Rockies (been a while): “If I had a head like that that didn’t hurt I’d go see a doctor”

  12. 12
    NotMax says:

    @West of the Rockies (been a while)

    Then don’t go like that.

    rimshot

  13. 13
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Oh, I get it. Cole is outsourcing his crankiness to twitter. I shan’t bother to respond.

    Cole, show your blog some respect. Without it, you wouldn’t be a Twitter player.

  14. 14

    Hm, I’m not seeing very many opinions on that tweet thread that are actually unpopular.

  15. 15
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Ksmiami:

    People in the other thread were constructing speeches that would include the phrase he knew what he signed up for that weren’t completely insensitive and dickish. This is part of the deal with narcissists — they know logically what they’re supposed to say, but because they don’t have any empathy, they don’t know how to construct the actual speech so that it’s comforting to another person. They just string the phrases together and assume that’s enough.

  16. 16
    Corner Stone says:

    There are few times I actually don’t mind some words from Parson Meacham. On this topic tonight may be one of them.

  17. 17
    Mnemosyne says:

    @West of the Rockies (been a while):

    So-so. I’ve been icing right on schedule and I take some more Advil in about 20 minutes. I still think it’s a bad sprain and not an ACL tear, but I guess there’s no way to know for sure without an MRI.

    Oh, and I discovered that our oldest cat is not afraid of the crutches. Like, at all. That seems weird, especially since the other two cats are freaked out by them.

  18. 18
    West of the Rockies (been a while) says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    Anyone see that horrific injury to Gordon Haywood of the Celtics? Reminiscent of Theismann.

  19. 19
    West of the Rockies (been a while) says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    Fingers crossed!

    At least it wasn’t your writing knee!

  20. 20
    sukabi says:

    @Mnemosyne: now you know which cat’s going to kill you. Be careful around stairs with your crutches and the cat.☺

  21. 21
  22. 22
    Sab says:

    I am not on Twitter so this entire post makes no sense to me. Cannot see what Cole is referring to, Pisses me off, like the secret in stuff in junior high school.

  23. 23
    Rommie says:

    Trump “beat” ISIS in 9 months, proving that Obama didn’t know what he was doing.

    GD, will anyone really buy that steaming pile? That’s like saying Truman whupped the Axis in under 4 months, because that damn lazy FDR was a incompetent boob. Not even Bizarro can sell that line of baloney.

  24. 24
    Mike J says:

    A nice caption from wikipedia, which I went to after reading the list:

    A square of American cheese is a component of the traditional cheeseburger, a popular food in North America.

  25. 25
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Major Major Major Major: There was a statue. I am not getting anything else. What am I missing?

  26. 26
  27. 27
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Short version: neo-Nazis were going on and on about how the statue was an example of white male European art at its finest, only to have someone clue them in that the artist is a Chinese woman.

    Hilarity ensued.

  28. 28
    West of the Rockies (been a while) says:

    @Sab:

    I don’t get it either, actually, but I’m just here for the free cookies…

    I was told there were homemade peanut butter cookies.

  29. 29
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Mnemosyne: Well, at least, Cole has respect for the format that gave him ‘net visibility.

  30. 30
    NotMax says:

    @Sab

    Ditto. No idea what Mr. Cole is going on about. Wouldn ‘t be the first time either.

    :)

  31. 31

    @Omnes Omnibus: There are multiple pictures.

    You can navigate with the right arrow key.

  32. 32
    Sab says:

    @Mnemosyne: How is your foot? You probably know this already but it was new to me. My spouse had back surgery a couple of years ago. His doctor recommended ice packs made by soaking kitchen towell in 1/4 rubbing alcohol and 3/4 water. Then we put them in big zip lock bags and packed them in the freezer. They got freezer cold but they didn’t freeze solid. So they are cold enough, but they aren’t stiff with those ice cube edges.

  33. 33

    @West of the Rockies (been a while): @Sab: For each ‘favorite’ that the tweet gets, Cole has been tweeting an “unpopular opinion”. You can see them if you scroll down from here.

  34. 34
    Steeplejack says:

    @Sab:

    You don’t have to be “on” Twitter to read Twitter stuff. If you click Cole’s “one like” black box at the top of this thread, it will take you to that illustration on Twitter. On that page, if you click the little blue X at the top, it will take you to the Twitter thread that shows you all the stuff Cole is talking about.

    Or you can just follow this link.

  35. 35
  36. 36
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Major Major Major Major: You assume technical competence that may be beyond me. I am a rather analogue person.

  37. 37

    @Mnemosyne:
    Luo Li Rong. The woman is a goddess. I can’t believe the cloth folding effects she gets out of bronze. Sculpts some damn pretty women, too.

  38. 38

    @Mnemosyne: I love 2001, but it’s definitely a niche sort of film. It’s a lot like Dunkirk: it’s about the experience, not the characters, which hardly exist. In terms of understanding what is going on, it helps to have read Arthur C. Clarke’s novel (which was written in conjunction with the movie; neither is adapted from the other). And the ending isn’t really explained until the sequel came out 15 years later.

    So, the movie had some flaws, and a lot of narrative choices that simply don’t work for many people. I liked it because it’s asking questions I’m very interested in, and it wasn’t like anything I had ever seen. In many ways, I still haven’t, though I thought that Interstellar was an outstanding remake of 2001, though its popularity is also limited for some of the same reasons.

  39. 39
    Steeplejack says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    What Major^4 said. When a Twitter image seems to show parts of several pictures or text blocks, when you click on it you see the first image. Then you can arrow right or slide right to see the remaining ones. In this case there are three: the statue; some quotes from some nimrods; and then another picture of the sculptor with the statue.

  40. 40

    @Omnes Omnibus: That’s why I told you which button on your keyboard to press.

  41. 41
    Mary G says:

    Dodgers win again.

  42. 42
    Christian says:

    Go to twitter and check out @mattyglesias (writes for Vox).
    He’s really good at this game today.

  43. 43
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Sab:

    His doctor recommended ice packs made by soaking kitchen towell in 1/4 rubbing alcohol and 3/4 water. Then we put them in big zip lock bags and packed them in the freezer. They got freezer cold but they didn’t freeze solid. So they are cold enough, but they aren’t stiff with those ice cube edges.

    So do you take the towels out of the Ziploc bags to use them, or leave them in the bag? I would think it would get messy to take them out. 🤔

    I have many different assorted cold packs both at home and at work. The “peas” style works pretty well and doesn’t get too pointy.

  44. 44
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Steeplejack: @Major Major Major Major: The sculptor is Asian in ancestry? That is the thing?

    I am going to go to bed and hope I wake up to a rational world.

  45. 45
    danielx says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Did I imagine it or did you have an alter ego here last evening named Omnes Ominbus?

  46. 46
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym:

    There’s a lot to admire in Kubrick’s movies, but they tend to leave me cold. G loves him, but he responds a lot more to pure visuals than I do.

    I always find it a little weird that Max Ophuls was one of Kubrick’s favorite directors, because Ophuls is steeped in emotion, but oftentimes artists admire in other artists the things they can’t do themselves.

  47. 47

    @Omnes Omnibus: The sculptor is an Asian woman. The first two tweets are Nazis talking about how the sculpture is a perfect example of western civilization and the great works men will create to idolize women.

  48. 48
    Steeplejack says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    That the sculptor is a woman is the main thing, after the nimrod gasses on about “Is there an example of a female sculptor who committed herself to the same level of detail that a male does with a woman?”

  49. 49
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Major Major Major Major: Yeah, i am going to bed now. I just can’t….. Sorry.

  50. 50
    efgoldman says:

    @Major Major Major Major:

    The first two tweets are Nazis talking about how the sculpture is a perfect example of western civilization and the great works men will create to idolize women.

    I heard they want to put it on a place of honor in the public lobby of the Hanoi Hilton

  51. 51

    @Steeplejack: I’d say that’s got parity with how she’s also Chinese, after he talks about how it’s a great example of European civilization.

    @efgoldman: I see Alain made the fixed-width font less hideous.

  52. 52
    The Dangerman says:

    Been watching the Dodger game (been their year, all year, just like the Cubs last year)….

    …so I missed it for a while and Heaven Knows I’m not fully sober, but how do you fuck up a condolence call? How hard can it be? Asshole.

    I propose they hook up electrodes to the fuckers balls for things like this; say your predecessors didn’t call families of the fallen, flip the switch. Fuck up a condolence call, up the amps. Maybe when his balls are zapped a few times, maybe he’ll learn.

  53. 53
    Sab says:

    @Mnemosyne: Leave them in the zip lock bag. Watwrproof and very cold but not frozen stiff.We have been reusing them for a couple of years. Park them in the freezer for use as needed.

  54. 54
    Roger Moore says:

    @Sab:
    I think the traditional alternative to this is to use bags of frozen peas, which are flexible and may already be found in your freezer.

  55. 55
    Sab says:

    @Mnemosyne: My spouse used frozen Brussel sprouts. Totally annoying, because whenever I wanted to cook them he had already wasted them by using them as ice packs. The alcohol towel ice packs are a good alternative. Soft, flexible, not wasting food.

  56. 56
    Suzanne says:

    My most unpopular opinion: pizza kind of sucks.

  57. 57
    Sab says:

    @Roger Moore: Wasting perfectly good food.

  58. 58

    The opinion that seems to get me in the most trouble is that javascript is hot garbage, but that really has more to do with the circumstances of my life than the opinion being that weird.

  59. 59
    Roger Moore says:

    @The Dangerman:

    how do you fuck up a condolence call?

    By lacking ordinary human empathy. Nothing sounds worse than trying to fake empathy and failing miserably.

  60. 60
    jl says:

    @Sab: frozen peas are not, and cannot be transformed into by any currently known process, human food.

  61. 61
    Sab says:

    @Sab: 40% of American food is wasted. This is factually correct but morally so wrong.

  62. 62
    Roger Moore says:

    @Sab:
    Actually, wasting pretty awful food, in my experience.

  63. 63
    Sab says:

    @jl: They are delicious if tossed into pasta with tomato sauce. All the nutrients and you will hardly notice them.

  64. 64
    Steeplejack says:

    @Major Major Major Major:

    Barely read their asinine comments. I must have been hypnotized by the perky breasts.

  65. 65
    Steeplejack says:

    @Suzanne:

    You’re doing it wrong.

  66. 66

    @Steeplejack: Yeah those were some visible nipples.

  67. 67
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Suzanne:

    That’s because you live in Phoenix. There is no good pizza in Phoenix.

  68. 68
    Steeplejack says:

    @Major Major Major Major:

    I tried to edit to “cartoonishly perky breasts,” but FYWP wouldn’t let me.

  69. 69
    Sab says:

    @Suzanne: You are so lucky. I love pizza,and it is so unhealthy. I have high blood pressure and high cholesterol. I would eat pizza 3 meals a day if it wouldnt kill me.But it will, so it is a very rare treat.

  70. 70
    Steeplejack says:

    Goddamn, this site is loading slower than balls right now. And I say that as someone who doesn’t really know how slow balls load.

    Fuck you, Taboola. Fuck you up your stupid ass.

  71. 71
    Roger Moore says:

    @Steeplejack:
    This. Good pizza is really great, but the pizza most people wind up eating is mass produced junk. Basing your opinion of pizza on Pizza Hut (or Dominoes, etc.) is like basing your opinion of cheese on Kraft singles.

  72. 72

    @Roger Moore: In fairness, I could fuck up a condolence call, too. Not quite for completely lacking empathy, but because I don’t understand the rules of human interaction in general, and grieving is at the top of the list. I feel awkward not only trying to express sympathy, but receiving it, too. That’s autism for you.

    On the other hand, I’m smart enough not to put myself into a position where I have to offer condolences in person to complete strangers as a part of my job.

  73. 73
    NotMax says:

    @Steeplejack

    Site gets the vapors post-midnight Eastern time on a regular basis now.

    Longest wait encountered recently during those episodes was (no exaggeration) eight minutes from clicking Post Comment to the page refreshing..

  74. 74
    Steeplejack says:

    @Roger Moore:

    Truth. It’s very easy to make badly, not so easy—but not impossible—to make well. And there are enough variables in the pizza “space” to accommodate almost any dietary restrictions.

  75. 75
    Steeplejack says:

    @NotMax:

    I thought the vapors didn’t roll in until about 4:00 a.m. This is still semi-prime time for commenting, especially for West Coast (and later) peeps.

  76. 76

    @NotMax: I believe it’s the result of a lengthy backup process.

  77. 77
    NotMax says:

    @Steeplejack

    There’s honest to goodness pizza and the there’s a menu full of pizzoids.

    White sauce and call it a pizza? Heresy.

  78. 78
    NotMax says:

    @Major Major Major Major

    This is something newer and looks to be different. The backup was (originally) explained to be around 4 in the a.m., Eastern time. What has happened of late is intermittent, kicks in and out without warning starting around 12:30 a.m. and lasts for hours.

  79. 79
    Steeplejack says:

    @Major Major Major Major:

    I wonder how lengthy, if going into morning post time is a concern. Even starting at 2:00 a.m. EDT would be much better. Let the morning peeps share a bit of the slowdown.

  80. 80

    @NotMax: Hm, I guess I hadn’t noticed. Somebody should look into that!

    @Steeplejack: I understand it’s pretty long on account of WordPress database design is dumb.

  81. 81
    Steeplejack says:

    @Steeplejack:

    I also wonder if it’s some of the background ad servers rebalancing, etc. On this tablet I can’t see which individual components are loading and taking a lot of time.

  82. 82
    different-church-lady says:

    I have no idea what the game is supposed to be, but this is effin’ brilliant:

    55.) Many times when you think someone has changed for the worse, you’ve actually just changed for the better and they stayed the same

  83. 83
    different-church-lady says:

    Oh, so is the game supposed to be, “See if you can come up with something that gets no more than one like”?

  84. 84
    J R in WV says:

    @Suzanne:

    Bad pizza is terrible, and even mediocre pizza is pretty bad. But great pizza is a gift from the food gods. Mixing flavors, being selective and having enough of each item without just making a stack of stuff, so you can taste each item added separately and with the other flavors to blend.

    Worst pizza disaster, in Wast Mass for summer symphony, hard to find good food in New England. Finally found local small mansion made into brick oven pizza place, looked forward to spicy Italian style food.

    Pizza did have crunchy good crust, but toppings were bland for the most part. So I asked for crushed red peppers, which pizza places lost in the western praries and deserts have, NOPE. Not in Massachusetts. Had never even heard of them. Had blank Franks Hot Sauce, which I tried to make the pepperoni spicy.

    Nope.

    Also hit family restaurant on the way up, just north of NYC, tried their roast turkey dinner as something hard to mess up. Theyhad a magic flavor remover device back in there. Nothing had any flavor, dressing was just damp bread. Turkey was just dry bird meat. Green BEans were just green tubes of squishy vegetation. WE added salt and pepper, then it just tasted salty. score = 0

  85. 85
    Amir Khalid says:

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym:
    I agree. Interstellar is a 2001 for the 21st century.

  86. 86
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Rommie:

    GD, will anyone really buy that steaming pile?

    The answer is always “yes”.

  87. 87
    Matt McIrvin says:

    Most of Cole’s unpopular opinions are fairly popular.

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