Open Thread

I haven’t seen Steve since last night and he missed his morning feeding, so I am wondering if he jumped the fence and is out and about. Not going to freak out because it is still daytime and he will probably come home tonight. But I hate it when he does this. The problem with cats is there is no real point searching for them because you will only find them when they want you to- he’ll either come home or he won’t. Furry bastards.

Everyone tell Steve to come home.






134 replies
  1. 1
    Trentrunner says:

    Steve, you erstwhile hirsute bastard, find your way home.

  2. 2
    burnspbesq says:

    Yo, Steve, get yer ass home. Your mom is having a meltdown.

  3. 3
    raven says:

    Get home big dude.

  4. 4
    Elizabelle says:

    Come home, Steve. You don’t have it so bad chez Cole.

  5. 5
    SFAW says:

    I’ll keep an eye out for him.

    I don’t like it when our cats disappear for a day or two, so I know that feeling.

    STEVE! GO HOME!

  6. 6
    Fair Economist says:

    Come home Steve!

    (He reads the internet? He IS really something!)

  7. 7
    Yutsano says:

    Steve will come home. Don’t freak out too bad.

    Work has me in Richmond, Virginia, from the 7th until the 20th of next month. Schedule will be a bit tight but I’ll e-mail Anne Laurie some more details later. I do have to go to Charlottesville to see a friend but most evenings I should be free.

  8. 8
    burnspbesq says:

    Since this is an open thread … if you are a fan of the wonderful singer-songwriter Lori McKenna, be advised that her forthcoming album is streaming for free at NPR First Listen.

  9. 9
    Trollhattan says:

    “Steeeeeeve!” [can-opener SFX]

    Has his hair done growed back from the sap trim?

  10. 10
    CaseyL says:

    Steve, you don’t want to miss last call of the night; come on home, big guy!

    (Mine stay out all night a lot in the summer, too.)

  11. 11

    Dammit, Steve–go home.

    Don’t make 2016 any worse than it already is.

  12. 12
    Mnemosyne says:

    I’m very peeved right now because my Fitbit Charge HR fell apart 3 months after the warranty expired and the most they’ll do is give me a discount on a new one. Come to find out, there have been multiple complaints about this and Fitbit is trying to cheap out.

    Now I’m considering a Garmin Vivofit. This is very annoying, because I’ve been a Fitbit customer for a while (this is my third one) and I’m really pissed that they would blow me off like this. So much for customer loyalty.

  13. 13
    Trollhattan says:

    @Mnemosyne:
    The Garmins are really good. Sounds like its time to jump.

  14. 14

    Cats are like that. Hope he wanders home soon.

  15. 15
    tinare says:

    That’s why, despite my cat’s loud protests, I don’t let mine outside. I could not handle the stress. Hope he’s back soon!

  16. 16
    FlipYrWhig says:

    C’mon, Steve, this isn’t funny anymore.

  17. 17
    rikyrah says:

    Steve,

    Bring your scary self back to Cole.

  18. 18
    germy says:

    Former Sandra Bland jailer admits falsifying logs — he never checked on her just before her death

  19. 19
    Cermet says:

    Steve, Cole is too old for this nonsense; so, get the fuck onto his lawn, now!

  20. 20
    jeffreyw says:

    All those alley cats out there that point at his bare butt and laugh? He’s busy kicking their asses. It’s probably a full day o’ whuppin’ work ahead.

  21. 21
    Michael says:

    My tom cat, Buddy, went missing for ten (!) days. He eventually came home and was sitting on the back porch by the sliding glass door. I opened the door, he looked at me, yelled at me, and went into the kitchen and CHOWED down. He lost 6 pounds, but was none the less no worst for the trial. I, on the other hand, was a mess for nearly two weeks. They are little shits. Aren’t they?

  22. 22
    J R in WV says:

    Steve is just being a big cat, quietly and invisibly ghosting around the neighborhood to see what he can see. And seeing if there’s anything he can catch that would be a different tasty bit before dinner.

    He’ll be back soon. Be calm.

  23. 23
    JordanRules says:

    Steve, hit Cole up, he’s looking for you playboy.

  24. 24
    Tilda Swinton's Bald Cap says:

    Steve, go home.

  25. 25
    laura says:

    Oh the Cat came back, the very next day.
    Steve! You come home now!
    If he doesn’t come right home, please ask all your neighbors to check their outer buildings garages, sheds etc., when Mr. Minkers pulled his last runner, I found him next door in the shed all askart due to a thundershower. He was reluctant to come out and needed a day or so to return to his formidable Top Cat self.

  26. 26
    Miss Bianca says:

    Last night was the first night we let the Office Kitties out on their own in the bigger store, and I was so worried about them getting into a bag of rat poison, or getting stuck under a shelf, or something similarly horrible happening. They were back in the office safe and sound when I got there in the morning – so they obviously survived – and were jumping on my keyboard and shutting down the computer (how do they manage to do that? – I can’t even figure out which combination of keys they’re hitting!). so obviously thriving, but I totally get it now about Cat Worry – come home, Steve!

  27. 27
    Mnemosyne says:

    @germy:

    EVEN IF she committed suicide, there’s a reason they’re supposed to check on the prisoners at regular intervals — to PREVENT them from doing that. Fucking lying asswipes.

  28. 28
    gogol's wife says:

    @laura:

    That’s a good idea.

  29. 29
    singfoom says:

    I hope Steve returns safe. I lost a wonderful kind and super smart cat to the vile attention of meth heads back in the day. I never let my kitties go outside after that. Turns out that the police really don’t care if someone hurts animals at all and have no interest in complaints about that.

    Steve, come home!

  30. 30
    Mnemosyne says:

    Also, this is why our cats are indoor only. I would be a nervous wreck if they were allowed outside. Of course, I live near a freeway and we have frequent coyote sightings, so there are probably a lot more apparent dangers.

    Sometimes standing at the door and shaking the bag of dry food can help.

  31. 31
    sherparick says:

    Steve, come home. Yep, always makes me nervous to when they do this. My ol’Tom is now old and not much of a wanderer so will spend the night sleeping on the back patio.

  32. 32
    🚸 Martin says:

    Steve had an appointment at a rally in Florida. Our next VP, carrying the great state of West Virginia.

  33. 33
    EriktheRed says:

    Get yer kitty butt back home, Steve.

  34. 34

    Sometimes they disappear when there are fireworks or earthquakes in the area.

    I once had a cat who disappeared for 3 days during a series of small quakes. The quakes were so small that I didn’t feel them, but my paper had a big front page article on a odd cluster of small quakes that had occurred.

  35. 35
    MomSense says:

    Go home right now, Steve.

  36. 36
  37. 37
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @Trollhattan: Do either of you, or anyone else, know of a device like that, that lets me control my own data?

  38. 38
    satby says:

    Hope Steve comes home soon. Good thoughts for that.

    That’s why I built a fully enclosed catio, so they wouldn’t get lost and their predations on local wildlife would be curtailed. It’s been a huge relief for all concerned, because cyotes and other predators are too close, as is a busy road that claims enough wildlife as is.

  39. 39
    Felonius Monk says:

    Steve, get the hell home where it’s safe. Donald Trump is on the loose.

  40. 40
    Soylent Green says:

    Cole, you are a prince among men, but please get rid of the fucking autoplay audio ads.

    Steve, get your ass in the house.

  41. 41
    Damned at Random says:

    I had a cat who disappeared and I figured the coyotes got him. About 3 months later, he stopped by for a visit. I guess the son-of-a-bitch found another woman.

    Get back home, Steve. You are missed

  42. 42
    RepubAnon says:

    @David 🍁▶️Hillary/Harley Quinn 2016▶️🍁 Koch: Those small quakes – maybe Chris Christie was doing jumping jacks.

    Steve, kitties need to come home – if they wander too often, their primate staff may make them wear collars with one of those Tile lost key trackers on it. (https://www.thetileapp.com/)

    Or maybe a cat-tracker: https://www.podtrackers.com/

  43. 43
    Gelfling 545 says:

    When a cat wants to be out and about, there’s no stopping them. Even my elderly fellow who decided 2 years ago that he wanted to live in my house, not just visit in bad weather, got a fit of the wanderlust a couple of days ago. He came back the next day & has stayed inside since. 90 degree temps vs air conditioning decided him, I think. Steve will be back when supper in the dish appeals more than supper in the hoof.

  44. 44
    Mary G says:

    Steve, your daddy is worried. Go home and he will give you a special treat after he is done being mad.

    My late Sophie ran out into a terrible storm. I had a sleepless night worrying about her, then found her perfectly dry, if very dusty, waiting at the front door to be let in.

  45. 45
    Cat48 says:

    Come on Steve, bring your butt home. Maybe Tuna tonight?

  46. 46
    Percysowner says:

    Steve! Come home!

    I have two that are indoor outdoor cats. Periodically they disappear and then I worry. I’ve tried to convince myself that until it’s a week, there’s nothing to worry about. So far, there hasn’t been. He’s out exploring and will come home when he’s tired and hungry and, with this weather, looking for air conditioning.

  47. 47
  48. 48
  49. 49
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    Here kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty,
    Here kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
    Here kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
    Here kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.
    HERE kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty.

    HEY STEVE!! GET YOUR SHAVED ASS BACK HOME!!

  50. 50
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @mdblanche:

    Eight dead now. Possibly nine.

  51. 51
    wmd says:

    I had to turn RC into an indoor cat due to fighting with ferals and subsequent abscesses. Around here cats get eaten by coyote and mountain lions as well, so being out overnight was worrisome back when he did go out.

    Hope Steve comes home soon, and is very hungry. If he’s being fed while he’s away his excursions are likely to continue.

  52. 52

    sometimes when my cat is gone all day, I leave his kat dish full of food on the porch and after a couple of hours he’s back, meowing for seconds.

  53. 53
    The Dangerman says:

    @David 🍁▶️Hillary/Harley Quinn 2016▶️🍁 Koch:

    By Washington Post Editorial Board July 22 at 3:59 PM

    Ouch. That wasn’t a rhetorical 2×4, that was a rhetorical Warthog (not the animal kind) to his ass.

  54. 54
    Mike in NC says:

    Go home, Steve!

    We live on a golf course with gators, so nobody lets their dogs and cats roam free.

  55. 55
    Fair Economist says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    Now I’m considering a Garmin Vivofit.

    My Garmin is still working a year and a half after I bought it. The rubber wristband broke over time, but there’s a spare. However, the heartbeat monitor never worked for me.

  56. 56
    Mnemosyne says:

    @mdblanche:

    It appears to be white supremacists. I didn’t realize that today is the 5th anniversary of the Norway massacre until the UK papers started saying it.

  57. 57
    Hungry Joe says:

    I give our Phoebe, an indoor/outdoor cat, just a tiny snack in the morning. She’s pretty much a homebody anyway, but by 2:30 or 3:00pm she’s hanging around the pet door meowing for dinner. I let her in, feed her, and raise the drawbridge.

    Our last cat, the very dearly departed Zelda, would have none of it. She’d trot up to the door when I noisily filled her bowl, then stay just out of my reach. She’d sit there for a while, thinking. About one time out of four she’d come in. The other three times she’d stroll away, just to annoy me. An hour or so later we’d replay the scene. Eventually she’d come in, but only after she’d made it clear that it was on her terms. Cats, man. Cats.

  58. 58
    manyakitty says:

    According to the missing pet boards I follow, it’s good to check under and around the house. If you go out at night with a flashlight, you can see his eyes reflecting back.

    At any rate, STEVE, GET YOUR BOOTY BACK HOME ON THE DOUBLE!

  59. 59
    OGLiberal says:

    Our cat got loose at our vacation trailer in the Poconos about a month ago and I and my wife spent 45 minutes circling her to make sure she didn’t leave the premises. Calling her had no effect as she knew that would mean inside and that’s not what she wanted. This was only her second excursion outside – she somehow wiggled out of the harness. She was sniffing around with that mouth open thing going on – cat owners will know. Couldn’t just leave her because she is an extreme indoor cat and would not fare well against raccoons, foxes or coyotes. The way we finally got her is to open the shed. Opening the shed padlock and latch sounds much like opening the attic door at open, another forbidden place for her. So she ran to the shed, I closed the door, and 10 minutes later she was at the door anxiously waiting to be set free. Now, she wanted to be set free to wander about the wilderness but I was able to catch her. I’ve had indoor cats who have had zero interest in being outside but while this cat was never an outdoor cat – born in a house, transferred to shelter, then adopted by us, she seems to think she’s Simba of the Wild or something like that. She doesn’t even know.

  60. 60
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Fair Economist:

    Checking again, and it’s the Vivosmart HR that I have my eye on. The one downside that people on Amazon have been complaining about is that the band cannot be replaced without sending it back to Garmin. OTOH, I’m not very hard on bands, so I might be okay.

    Also, come to find out that Fossil makes their own smart watches now, powered by Android. That’s a little bit tempting, but I would have to try one on, because I am a short woman with smallish wrists and a too-big watch looks silly on me.

  61. 61
    🐾BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @RepubAnon: I put a tile on my yorkiepom, she disappeared once and I found her wandering around the crawl space under the house(the landlord left it open after some repairs).

  62. 62
    amygdala says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: You beat me to it.

    Yo, Steve: home now, please.

  63. 63
    Barbara says:

    @Michael: My family cat ran away from us when we were at the veterinarian’s (she was exceptionally high strung) and she made her way home 11 days later. At five in the morning I had a dream that a fife and drum corps was marching around my house and when I woke up I heard this unearthly wailing, which turned out to be coming from the missing cat sitting on the window sill. She blew past me and went straight to my mother’s room and promptly sat on her face and continued wailing. Needless to say, we were all overjoyed. I hope Steve gets safely home quick.

  64. 64
    jacy says:

    Go home, Steve!

    Last month my mom’s elderly cat just disappeared. After 5 days, she was convinced he had gone off somewhere to die and so she packed up his bed and all his stuff. After 7 days he was back, wondering where the fuck his food bowls had disappeared to.

  65. 65

    @Mnemosyne: Is that confirmed, Mnem? I saw the speculation earlier, but all the news reports I’ve found are uninformative about the shooters.

  66. 66
    Cckids says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    Sometimes standing at the door and shaking the bag of dry food can help.

    When my food-loving cat gets out, I shake the canister of crunchy treats & yell “TREATS”.

    He appears so fast I’d swear he’s apparating.

  67. 67
    Aleta says:

    Sometimes when mine get out it takes awhile to find them just because they automatically switch to nocturnal cat time, synch to mice, hunt all night, sleep off and on all day. I have best luck finding them around 5 pm or if I call them off and on during the night. I tap on cans with a fork because the sound vibrates and carries and it sounds like dinner opening. Coincidentally, I have one like Steve but a lot smaller, and yesterday he was gone all night and all day, finally showed up after dark last evening. Whew.

  68. 68
    Punchy says:

    What the hell makes y’all think Steve even reads this blog?

  69. 69
    toschek says:

    Have your neighbors open their garage doors. Cats like to go sleep inside garages in the summer because the floor is cool, then when the owner closes the door they get trapped. It’s a way that a lot of indoor/outdoor cats get lost and die. We had it happen to us a few years ago and now I don’t let my cats out ever.

  70. 70
    burnspbesq says:

    @David 🍁▶️Hillary/Harley Quinn 2016▶️🍁 Koch:

    The in-house lawyers at Amazon just became the biggest Clinton supporters in Seattle.

  71. 71
    Mary G says:

    It’s not good news that another innocent unarmed black man has been shot and killed by a cop, but after reviewing the dashcam video, the Atlanta police fired the cop and charged him with murder.

    This will send a message that actions have consequences and possibly deter more trigger-happy goons in the future.

    If this has already been posted, I apologize, but I had to give myself an internet time-out today.

  72. 72
    gwangung says:

    @Mary G: I’ll be more impressed IF he’s convicted. Sorry.

  73. 73
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @laura:

    Oh the Cat came back, the very next day.

    Meow, kitty,
    Meow, so pretty.

  74. 74
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @Punchy: Well, somebody in that house has to.

  75. 75
    Barbara says:

    @David 🍁▶️Hillary/Harley Quinn 2016▶️🍁 Koch: The Washington Post has been braver and more hard hitting when it comes to Trump than nearly any other news source. For all that I hate most of their Op-Ed columnists, they do not view Trump through the lens of entertainment rather than news.

  76. 76
    Fair Economist says:

    @Mnemosyne: Obviously that’s a completely different design: on mine you can just pop the functional part out of the band. My original had a stiff band that became brittle after a while; it broke in the shower, not due to hard use. It had already lost some of the end but not up to the spot where I fastened it. Initially I couldn’t find my replacement band so I ended up buying a replacement; this one is a softer material and may be more durable, but I’ve only been using it about 6 weeks.

  77. 77
    The Dangerman says:

    The Onion

    I know this is redundant (Balloon-Juice, Onion), but this is very NSFW.

  78. 78
    Mike J says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    Now I’m considering a Garmin Vivofit. This is very annoying, because I’ve been a Fitbit customer for a while (this is my third one) and I’m really pissed that they would blow me off like this. So much for customer loyalty.

    Garmin appears to let you save data directly to your own computer without shipping it off to them. Fitbit will only give you a small slice of your data, charge you for a slightly larger slice, and make it impossible to see your own data without first giving it to them. Fitbit sucks.

  79. 79
    Enhanced Voting Techinques says:

    For someone from an entertainment background, Trump certainly doesn’t think about names:

    “Pardon me my good sir, but can you make change for my trumppence? I need some fatherings to purchase bombast at the confectionary”

  80. 80
    Seanly says:

    Hope Steve comes home soon!

    My dogs had a fun little jailbreak this week. Got this text from my wife yesterday:

    OMG. The dogs went crazy when the appraiser came, sniffed him up and then both RAN for it! Well, they didn’t respond to my calls and chasing, and I had to tell the appraiser to go ahead with the inspection and I got into the car and went to look for them. Drove around our neighborhood, then went into the neighborhood behind us. Came out Holcomb to Boise, and thankfully they were coming my way, down Boise, still basically together! And they came running and jumped into the car when I called! Whew! They were wet…enough for me to think they got into the canal. I got home and the appraiser was finished, and we had a laugh about it. And now the girls don’t need a walk today! Little shits.
    Thought I was going to have to call out from work today.

    One of the dogs had previously gotten out a window. We had spent all night looking for her and then had to claim her from the ASPCA the next day. Someone almost hit her & was able to coax her into their car. Little shits indeed!

  81. 81
    D58826 says:

    @Punchy: I thought B-I-P was Steve in mufti?

  82. 82
    Cat48 says:

    Mrs. Greenspan is following Hillz & she’s annoyed bc she is late for her rally. She just can’t wait for Tim Kaine to be selected bc she has told us all week it would be Kaine. She said the black caucus is happy about Tim Kaine.

    Steve, don’t stay out another night. Come home tonight. Don’t be rude to John. We don’t want him to worry. I hate when cats do this.

  83. 83
    Fair Economist says:

    @Mike J:

    Garmin appears to let you save data directly to your own computer without shipping it off to them. Fitbit will only give you a small slice of your data, charge you for a slightly larger slice, and make it impossible to see your own data without first giving it to them. Fitbit sucks

    Oreally? Yeah, the Garmin data collection is non-creepy although I don’t usually bother. Transfer is a bit slow, and I don’t have any desire to do statistics. I only transfer because the watch is slow too (loses about 1 minute per week) and data transfer is the only way to reset the time. I’ll never buy a Fitbit if they demand my personal data like that.

  84. 84
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Iowa Old Lady: All they really have is that one witness said they heard a shooter yelling an insult about immigrants. The police aren’t saying anything about the shooters and they’re requesting that people not spread uninformed speculation.

    IS claimed responsibility and their supporters are celebrating, but that should probably be taken as imparting no information.

  85. 85
    Aleta says:

    Oh yeah, once or twice I flung catnip around outside the door. And once when I had to get on the road, a little juice from a tuna can. That might bring raccoons though.

  86. 86
    Mary G says:

    @gwangung: I know, but we have to start somewhere, and he lied in his statement (the old fear for my life BS), and at least got called on it and fired.

  87. 87
    TriassicSands says:

    Cats can be truly inconsiderate. They never stop to consider that we worry about them when they suddenly disappear. It can be a dangerous world for felines — vehicles, predators (if you live in that kind of environment), and, of course, radical jihadist Mexican Muslims (though they are really targeting humans and their offspring, not our companion critters).

    I hope Steve makes it home none the worse for wear. He needs to maintain some balance in a household overrun with evil doggies.

  88. 88
    pseudonymous in nc says:

    Steve: get home, you furry bugger.

  89. 89
    gwangung says:

    @Mary G: Yah. At least that…Tamir Rice’s murderer didn’t get that (even though he lied straight up three times).

    But that’s cold comfort for the families. And for the black community.

  90. 90
  91. 91
    p.a. says:

    Steeeeeevvvveeeee. Hoooooooommmmeeee. Fooooooooooooddddd.

    Truck Fump

  92. 92
    gogol's wife says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    I hate to say it, but if it’s white supremacists I’m relieved.

  93. 93
    rikyrah says:

    @Mnemosyne:
    Of course, they will be ‘lone wolfs’

  94. 94
  95. 95
    hedgehog mobile says:

    Steve,come home!

  96. 96
    Emma says:

    Yo, furry butt, get back home. It’s supper time!

  97. 97
    LAC says:

    Come home Steve!

    Since it is an open thread…

    Oh, and a note to the Brexit asshole who tried to make my point about food trivial: On NPR a couple of days ago there was a segment about this very topic – “in Paris, where food is king, refugee chefs show what they have to offer” . Apparently there is an international organization who encourages dialogue between cultures through food, called Food Sweet Food. Who knew? Ok dipshit?

    And as for Cleveland riots stemming from protests… There was more danger to the Cruz family inside.

  98. 98
  99. 99
    Technocrat says:

    Neither my wife or I believe in a God, but we do believe in a Parking Goddess.

    We discovered her at our first apartment, which was located on a very busy street a block from the prime shopping district. It’s a real bummer to have to park 4 blocks from your own house because the street is full. One day my wife said “Oh Goddess of Parking, give us a space”. An awkward silence ensued when we drove by our apartment and saw an empty space – right in front.

    Over the years, we’ve discovered that the PG takes care of more than just parking. We’ve called on her for job interviews (a few of which I landed), lost car keys (which we always eventually find), and a pregnancy test (which yielded the desired result). The only place she has failed (and rather spectacularly) was in nudging my daughter towards the college major we wanted. We’ve since decided that last was our mistake, clearly the Parking Goddess is not into mind control.

    Anyway, I’ve asked the PG to send Steve home safe. No need to thank me, Cole.

  100. 100
    LAC says:

    @Cckids: LOL! You and me both

  101. 101
    Mj_Oregon says:

    STEVE!!! HOME!!!! NOW!!!!!!!

    Stupid cats. I hate when one goes missing from my outdoor rescue clowder. One of the on-again/off-again members has been gone for two weeks. I don’t think he’s coming back this time. Got my fingers crossed that Steve shows up soonest!!

  102. 102
    gogol's wife says:

    I hope John bothers to let us know when he comes back.

  103. 103
    gogol's wife says:

    @Major Major Major Major:

    ISIS feeds into Trump’s narrative. I’m very sorry it’s happening at all, of course, I hope that goes without saying.

  104. 104
    Ben Cisco says:

    @laura: The cat came back, we thought he was a goner

  105. 105
    Miss Bianca says:

    @Technocrat: There is, indeed, a Goddess of Parking and Other Things. Her name is Sheila. And the mantra for summoning a parking space as you’re driving around is, “Sheila sits on my shoulder, she doesn’t shit on my head.”

    Ask me not how I know these things. Just accept it. You’re welcome.

  106. 106
    gogol's wife says:

    @Major Major Major Major:

    Unfortunately what I’m seeing makes it look more like it’s ISIS-inspired.

  107. 107
    Trollhattan says:

    @Matt McIrvin:
    Hell, IS takes responsibility for really bad freeway wrecks. “Yeah, that’s one of ours. Up yours America/Great Britain/France/Germany/Iraq/everyone not us.” Or as I call them: Trump voters.

  108. 108
    different-church-lady says:

    Ah, yes, I remember well the first big blizzard with my little man. He was an outdoor cat well before I got him but I had no idea how he’d handle a foot of snow. So the first few flakes started coming down and I figured I better let him in off the porch.

    Except no cat on the porch.

    20 min. later: still no cat on the porch.

    1 HR: about an inch on the ground. No cat.

    2 HR: No cat

    3 HR: No cat. Enough snow to plow.

    5 HR: Neighbors wondering who the idiot is wandering around the block ratting a jar of cat treats in a blizzard is. Weirdo is also looking under bushes and stopping ever few seconds hearing imaginary mews of pain from getting hit by a plow.

    7 HR, 9 inches on the ground. Figure I’ll go hit the shelters in the morning, see if he got turned in. It was nice knowing him.

    9 HR, 1 foot of snow: Little bastard comes flouncing down the street, skips his way into the house, absolutely wreaking of cigarette smoke and someone else’s kitchen.

    STEVE, QUIT BEING A SHIT AND GET YOUR ASS HOME.

  109. 109
    Carl W says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    Also, come to find out that Fossil makes their own smart watches now, powered by Android.

    So they’re getting back into the smart watch business… nice. I have one of these (somewhere), from 2003. (I read an ebook on it once, just so I could say I did.)

  110. 110
    Trollhattan says:

    @gogol’s wife:
    BBC posted this, but it’s far too early and still fluid to trust the info coming out.

    Witness Luan Zequiri said he was at the scene when the shooting broke out. He tells the Germany broadcaster n-tv that he heard the attacker yell an anti-foreigner slur. He says he saw only one attacker, who was wearing boots and a backpack.

  111. 111

    @Trollhattan: Somebody also said she heard the shooter yell “Allahu akbar,” and she said “I know because I am Muslim”. Who knows. Witnesses, you know?

  112. 112
    piratedan says:

    sounds like a good night to do tunafish

  113. 113
    Tokyokie says:

    Hope Steve gets home soon, and I’m familiar with the worry when one of the quadrupedal knuckleheads goes missing. My current cats are all indoor kitties, and on the rare occasions one them escapes, it will usually be found a few hours later cowering in fear on the back porch. (I think it may have had something to do with the pit bulls the former next-door neighbor kept.) We used to let Marvin, our lunatic lilac-point Siamese out in the back yard when we were with him, but he brought too many fleas in with him.

  114. 114
    debbie says:

    Steve, don’t ignore the hand that feeds you! Go home!

  115. 115
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Iowa Old Lady:

    It’s what Reuters was reporting, but things change rapidly in these situations.

  116. 116
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Technocrat:

    Can you please ask her to find my missing engagement ring that belonged to my grandmother? I’m about ready to start burning a candle to St. Jude over here.

  117. 117
    scuffletuffle says:

    Has anyone warned the groomer that had to shave his ass?

  118. 118
    Old Broad in California says:

    Steve, go home NOW. Little stinker.

  119. 119
    CZanne says:

    @Mnemosyne: I like my Misfit Shine. No major charging (it runs on a coin battery that needs a change every 3-5 months) and in the necklace or the professional watch band, it is secure. I’ve had mine for most of a year with no problems. Three weeks after I got mine, Misfit noticed that my new, factory battery seemed low and mailed me a packet of spares, no charge.

    Detail data is always on the phone, not the device, and time is always to the closest 5 minutes since it has an analog time display. I actually like that about it — if I need precise time, that’s what my phone is for.

    They’re also inexpensive — $40 for the Shine pebble, $15 for a leather or metal band and housing, $15 for the necklace housing. I very much like that it looks like jewelry and looks professional. I would say to skip the magnetic silicone wristband — it’s not as secure as a buckle.

  120. 120
    Ella in New Mexico says:

    But I hate it when he does this. The problem with cats is there is no real point searching for them because you will only find them when they want you to-

    Why do they do this to us? I have one that does this two or three times a year. He has literally disappeared for two+ days, only to come bounding through the doggie door wailing “I’m home! I’m home!” and demanding to be fed like he never left. I suspect he has gotten stuck in a neighbor’s storage shed or garage somehow and couldn’t get out until someone opened the door. You’d think it’d teach them a lesson!

    Little bastards.

  121. 121
    WaterGirl says:

    Steve, I have been calling for you from Illinois and sending you the mind-meld in case you can’t hear me all the way in WV. Please come home now. Please please please.

  122. 122
    Amaranthine RBG says:

    Maybe instead you should keep your cat inside.

    Domestic cats kill millions and millions of birds every year.

  123. 123
    Technocrat says:

    @Mnemosyne:

    My Internet is acting funky, but I’ll give it a shot…

    …oh. Funny! She’s says it’s right behind th

  124. 124
    stinger says:

    Steve, come home!

    God, I know exactly how this is. They always do turn up, though. What little I can do to help, I will.

    Coooommmmmme hooooooommmmmmmme!

  125. 125
    muddy says:

    @jacy: My cat was missing for a week a couple of years ago. And he’s not one to miss a meal, nor yet venture very far. I think he got closed up in someone’s garage.

  126. 126
    catclub says:

    @muddy: Our previous cat loved our attic, so when the neighbor’s garage was open she went up in their attic.

    Luckily I heard her meowing out the eaves.

  127. 127
    muddy says:

    @catclub: I had given mine up for dead, it was a great surprise. Hopefully John has asked his neighbors about sheds etc.

  128. 128
    Miki says:

    Fuck you, Steve. We can’t handle this. The stress to our hearts from worrying about you is barely more than the stress from worrying about Cole. So just stop.

    Come home now, and don’t ever leave again.

    Sincerely,

    Jane and Michael Banks

  129. 129
    Mary in Ohio says:

    When the late great Bella went missing we were told to go outside and talk in our normal voices, not the stressed out sounding”Here kitty kitty kitty” that most people do. We tried it but no cat appeared. The next morning I was getting ready for work at 6 am. Bathroom window was open and I was talking to Mr. Mary in Ohio when I hear a tiny meow outside. She was sitting under the bathroom window just listening to us. Go outside. Talk in a normal voice. See what happens. COME HOME STEVE!

  130. 130
    pat says:

    So much good advice for Cole. Any indication that he’s following it?

    When we got home from a vacation we discovered a dead cat in our garage. Had never seen it before, no idea how it got there or where it came from.

    CHECK SHEDS

  131. 131
    Amir Khalid says:

    @Amaranthine RBG:
    You’re all heart, aren’t you?

  132. 132
    Amaranthine RBG says:

    @Amir Khalid:

    Sometimes what you need to hear isn’t what you want to hear.

    Or, to personalize it like you have: You really don’t give a shit about tens of millions of birds being killed, do you?

  133. 133
    manyakitty says:

    @Amir Khalid:
    @Amaranthine RBG: Yes, but timing. And all the “keep him inside” advice. Wait to indulge your need to set people straight until after Steve gets home.

  134. 134
    Sandia Blanca says:

    Update above says he showed up, all covered with cheese! (Sorry, with burrs.)

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