In this video, right after Carly Fiorina says, “Your next President of the United States, Ted Cruz,” she disappears:
It is reported that she fell off the stage and was uninjured. Maybe. But who’s to say the devil himself didn’t just open a trapdoor to hell after she told that big fat lie?
Satan is allegedly the “Father of Lies,” so why would a standard bit of campaign mendacity provoke his wrath? Maybe the devil hates that miserable son of a bitch Cruz as much as everyone else does.
Open thread!
scav
Maybe she’s just learned her place and knows to get out of the way pronto when the true savior appears on stage.
Ryan
It’s obvious that Hitlery and Obama’s time machine are behind this shenanigans. Carly is now the second person to go up against the Clinton Machine and live to tell about it!
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Revrick
He doesn’t like being upstaged?
cleek
@srv:
well, there’s the part where he’s essentially out of the race but continues to shit all over Clinton and the Party itself. that doesn’t help anyone but St Sanders.
Villago Delenda Est
Um, Carly…Rafael doesn’t even stand a chance of a first ballot nomination, let along being the nominee, so “Next President of the United States” is terribly, terribly presumptuous of you.
Oh, wait. This is Carly, the bidness genious we’re talking about.
Never mind.
Villago Delenda Est
@Revrick: If the Presidential candidate in question were The Donald, there’s no doubt about that.
“Get on the plane. Go home. Get on the plane.”
Keith P.
I look forward to hearing Carly sing “Sweet Child O’ Mine” while sitting in a motorized throne.
Mike J
HAZARD SCORES! CHELSEA TIES IT UP AT 2!
Leicester win the league if the score holds for 7 more minutes plus stoppage.
Villago Delenda Est
@srv: The magic word here is “a POLITICO analysis”. Which means “ridiculously suspect.”
Renie
It appeared that Cruz looked down at her and did nothing but turned towards the people standing next to him.
redshirt
Don’t most evil people have trapdoors?
Mike J
@Villago Delenda Est:
misterpuff
Demon Ewe gets a Boo-Boo.
Villago Delenda Est
@Mike J: Forgive me if my math is off, but $9.5 million of $36 million is slightly more than 1%?
Steeplejack (phone)
@Mike J:
Great match. Tottenham is devolving in the last minutes.
Weaselone
@Villago Delenda Est:
Honestly, anything from the media that involves any sort of math calculation is highly suspect.
BretH
Some unseen person had just slipped her $40 million to Go Away.
muddy
Lo, she spake the name of Satan, and he drew her to the depths…
Mike J
@Steeplejack (phone):
Whats the record for yellows in stoppage?
We hate Tottenham Hotspur!
We hate Arsenal too!
We hate Man United!
But Chelsea we love you!
Just Some Fuckhead, Clinton Supporter
I thought I’d done witnessed The Rapture, glawreeeeeeeeeeeee to God! Take me, Jesus!
raven
GOOOOOOOAAAAALLLL
raven
Aren’t these guys a little premature on who wins?
raven
Jeffrey Goes To Leicester Square-Jethro Tull
Steeplejack (phone)
@Mike J:
Dunno. But nine bookings just for Tottenham today.
Does the EPL do post-match reviews and tack on penalties?
Uh-oh, ruckus by the tunnel!
raven
@Steeplejack (phone): Bungle in the Jungle!
Mike J
@Steeplejack (phone):
Yes.
I think the ref should have used a stronger hand in the first half with both teams.
goblue72
Hillary Clinton’s claim to be fundraising for the Democratic Party as a whole appears to be as much full of shit as the rest of her campaign.
Trollhattan
@srv:
Was the former already claimed?
raven
@goblue72: You got a lot of guts talking about someone else being full of shit.
Uncle Cosmo
When Orange Julius characterized Cruz-Rhymes-With-Lose as “Lucifer in the flesh,” even the Prince of Darkness took exception.
chopper
@raven:
hah!
NotMax
That’s one small misstep for woman and one giant creep for mankind.
schrodinger's cat
She is a Founder*, that’s why she disappeared.
*From DS9.
Miss Bianca
@redshirt: Most Elizabethan plays with devils in them routinely used the trap door feature. They were built into the stage. Medieval plays tended to go with the hell-mouth image.
@NotMax: Oooh…you’re wicked!
Germy Shoemangler
I was puzzled by the non-reaction of Ted & Heidi. I’m guessing iCarly landed on her rump and then looked up, laughed and told them “I’m okay, I’m okay” and so they continued campaigning.
I mean if she’d really hurt herself, they would have stopped and given her immediate attention, right?
Right?
kindness
That video of Carly falling would be classic if we could post our own audio over it. We’re an imaginative bunch. Of course it would be better…
Miss Bianca
@raven: The phrase my mother always used was “More nerve than sense.” ; )
Steeplejack (phone)
@Mike J: Yep. And there should have been at least one red toward the end.
Germy Shoemangler
@Miss Bianca: There’s the scene in “A Hard Day’s Night” where the old man sneaks on the rising platform (thinking he’s found the perfect hiding place) and finds himself suddenly onstage at a Beatles concert.
Uncle Cosmo
Expansion on the announcement of the discovery of 3 planets in the habitable zone of a “nearby” star, mentioned in an earlier open thread:
From Space.com
JCJ
Leicester!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
schrodinger's cat
I found this awesome video, Maulie Maulie that documents the journey (vari) that thousands of devotees make from all over Maharashtra to Pandharpur to see their Maulie (mother) Vithoba on the banks of Chandrabhaga. They usually walk, singing and dancing along the way. So much in common between varkaris (Bhakti movement in general) and Sufis in their rejection of the more conservative aspects of their respective religions.
Iowa Old Lady
I laughed and laughed. I am a bad person.
raven
@Germy Shoemangler: He’s clean. . .
Rommie
I believe the proper term from Mr. Cruz’s home state is sumbitch.
Miss Bianca
@Germy Shoemangler: love that scene. love that whole movie. time for a re-view, definitely!
tybee
@srv:
what if she pulls up the former?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
what do they say in Alberta? “oh, I’d say that fella’s a right stinker, eh!”
tybee
@Trollhattan:
damn you.
burnspbesq
@goblue72:
Well, Mr. Credibility has been heard from. Might as well fold up our tents and go home.
Calouste
@goblue72: As full of shit as Bernie “my tax returns are really simple, but my wife can’t find them” Sanders?
Uncle Cosmo
@Germy Shoemangler:
For some reason that non-reaction called to mind Candidate Stilson using a baby for a shield in The Dead Zone. Maybe because it sheds light on DetesTed’s character (or more properly, lack thereof). Might be nice if it had the same effect on the real-life campaign.
Trollhattan
@tybee:
So, you’re buying the first round?
Schlemazel Khan
His majesty, Cruzifer, is unaware of the fall but Mrs. Cruzifer sees it, reacts for a second and then goes back to smiling and waving. She is the perfect, soulless, match for the evil pustual.
Mike J
Germy Shoemangler
@Uncle Cosmo: I saw the video of Ted facing a crowd of sign-waving Trump supporters. He calmly refutes each of their shouting points. Even brings Mike Tyson into the discussion, hoping that’d win them over.
No punches were thrown but the crowd was NOT buying what he tried to sell.
Mnemosyne
@Germy Shoemangler:
I only saw that movie for the first time recently (what can I say, I’m a young’n, relatively speaking) and that scene made me laugh out loud. Perfectly timed for maximum comedy.
Unabogie
@Mike J: the rotund Madame…she is crooning…
NotMax
Dollars to doughnuts that Rachel pairs it with the video of Gary Bauer.
raven
I always knew he was a stupid motherfucker.
Germy Shoemangler
@Mnemosyne: The scene with the old man meeting the magician and giving him a congratulatory slap on the back, accidentally killing one of his concealed birds.
Schlemazel Khan
There are Dems who think Hill fans are dumb.
Seems she’s “evil” and “venal,” to some.
Here’s my question: When Bern
Does back Hill, will they spurn
“Sainted Bern” and demote him to scum?
Germy Shoemangler
What if someone throws a pie at Cruz and he grabs iCarly as a human shield…
And then his approval numbers go up?
Schlemazel Khan
@raven:
Gawd but I hate that tiny motherfucker. He was scum when he was here & I had to listen to his canned speech 4 times because the big money boys thought it was motivational. It was bullshit on toast & he is as phony as a $3 bill
Iowa Old Lady
@Mnemosyne: Hey, Mnem, I was eating lunch in Panera and reading Hamiltome, when a college age woman stopped by my table and said she was obsessed by the play. She’d gone running that morning with the album pumping through her earbuds. She said she sang along and pretended she was Lafayette.
Schlemazel Khan
Can Carly help Teddy prevail?
His desp’rate Hail Mary will fail.
Though she’s brighter than Palin,
Ted’s ‘woman card’s’ ailin’.
He’s not SURE Carly isn’t a male
Germy Shoemangler
@Schlemazel Khan:
Those who hate Hillary still will
If/when Sanders shakes hands with HillBill
But don’t worry, they’ll be fine
They still have Jill Stein
For the rest of us: the Art of The Dill…
Mnemosyne
@Iowa Old Lady:
Apparently you can take a “Hamilton” spin class in NYC. It’s frickin’ everywhere. I told you about the yarn ads I saw that referenced it, right?
If you look on YouTube, they did a Ham4Ham where they had three people compete to win a copy of the cast album by doing Lafayette’s rap from “Guns and Ships.” The winner was an Asian-American woman in her early 20s who brought the house down.
Shana
The young woman who won is a friend of my younger daughter and a fellow UChicago alum.
Iowa Old Lady
@Mnemosyne: I was delighted to meet another fan here in the middle of nowhere.
Gimlet
http://rollingout.com/2016/05/02/little-richard-gravely-ill-according-to-bootsy-collins/
Iconic musician and father of Rock & Roll, Little Richard is believed to be in serious medical distress. Over the past few years, Little Richard has suffered from a stroke, hip surgery and most recently a heart attack that has seen him become even more reclusive in his Macon, Georgia home..”
The rumor mill has started to fly and fans are now growing concerned over the singer’s health and reports that family members are gathering at his bedside. Multiple media outlets are now reporting that Little Richard is in critical condition at an unnamed hospital. However, there has been no official word from his publicist or family members about his health. In 2013, he suffered a heart attack during a fundraising event for the Recording Academy and announced his retirement from music a few weeks afterwards. Before the announcement, he had to stop a concert when he told the audience that he could barely breathe and exited the stage.
shortribs
@srv:
It doesn’t do any good sitting in a coffer (and really, who uses those anymore?), so I assume it’s been spent or as the article said, transferred to the DNC who’s sole purpose is to build the Democratic party, what’s the issue here?
gogol's wife
@Mike J:
I WANT HER TO CRUSH HIM
THEN CRUSH TRUMP
AxelFoley
@gogol’s wife:
And then hear the lamentation of their women?
Ken
@raven:
We’re an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality.
Ken
@Schlemazel Khan:
Maybe she suppressed her first instincts and kept going, all the while thinking “He said keep smiling, he said keep smiling and waving, I mustn’t get him angry again…”
Schlemazel Khan
@AxelFoley:
HEY! THATS MY LINE!
Sad_Dem
@Germy Shoemangler:
If by “attention” you mean ring-pulling and going through her pockets for change, then yes.
ThresherK
All I can think of is Margaret Hamilton, as the Wicked Witch of the Westt, going thru a trap-door.
Francis
@Iowa Old Lady: My wife and I have tickets for this Thursday.
gogol's wife
@Francis:
I hate you.
Not really. Have fun! Then come back here and join us annoying Hamilmaniacs.
Chip Daniels
Maybe someone else noted it, but I had to laugh at seeing the Yahoo headline, about how Heidi Cruz has responded to accusations that her husband is the Zodiac killer.
It reminds me of the famous LBJ line, where he wanted to accuse some guy of being a pig-f*cker, just to watch him deny it.
Amir Khalid
@Gimlet:
As I recall, Little Richard was the first gay iconic figure in rock music.