@ProfJeffJarvis is the only thing that makes twitter worth reading for me.
His fake Innovation Party piece (deleted, but you can read it here) is the best piece of parody trolling I’ve seen in quite some time.
by DougJ| 79 Comments
This post is in: Blogospheric Navel-Gazing
@ProfJeffJarvis is the only thing that makes twitter worth reading for me.
His fake Innovation Party piece (deleted, but you can read it here) is the best piece of parody trolling I’ve seen in quite some time.
Comments are closed.
Tractarian
I’m still not 100% convinced you are not @ProfJeffJarvis, Doug.
Trollhattan
Hilarious, even if I’m oblivious to a quarter of the buzzwords. People actually talk like this and believe they’re communicating. I’ve seen it; it frightens me a little.
Major Major Major Major
god how did i end up in tech
Matt McIrvin
It kind of amazes me that the original “Innovation Party” article got so much ridicule when it appeared; I’m positive that in, say, 2002 it would have gotten mostly positive attention.
different-church-lady
“…hyperglobal thinkfluencer…”
@Trollhattan: Oh, it’s much worse: people actually talk like that and believe they’re fixing things.
Technocrat
@Trollhattan:
I remember, years ago, being taught to “power-cycle” a computer to fix a certain problem. Of course I was like “Sorry? How do I power cycle something?”.
“Oh, that means turn it off and on again”.
Gin & Tonic
The best part of this, to me, was finding out the real name of the satirist in question (Rurik Bradbury) and being awestruck that someone in the 20th century would name their son “Rurik.”
Major Major Major Major
@Matt McIrvin: When was TED still a thing? It would have been then.
Mnemosyne
I managed to talk my spouse into getting season tickets to the Pantages next year. So, not only guaranteed “Hamilton” tickets, but also “Hedwig & the Angry Inch,” “The King and I,” “Finding Neverland,” “An American in Paris,” and “Book of Mormon.” All for less than $100 per seat total. Woot!
Redshift
That essay is utterly brilliant.
p.a.
@Major Major Major Major: read that article at Aspen and the audience will have a group spooge.
@Mnemosyne: awesome!
Miss Bianca
@Mnemosyne: Woot, indeed!
Wag
Best piece of political satire I’ve read in a year. Awesome!
Mike J
I thought peach was only a thing for about 36 hours one weekend. Does anyone still use it?
Wag
@Technocrat: Lol
BillinGlendaleCA
@Major Major Major Major: Medicine seemed to icky?
Feathers
Disruption wasn’t around in 2002. Clay Christianson is a great guy, but the whole disruption thing is a huge bag of stupid. It allows anyone with sufficient ego and a lack of brains to think dazzle creates change. Disruption is basically if it is tech bullshit, it MUST come true.
The most dangerous thing anyone has every thought is “things can’t get any worse.”
Peale
@Feathers: Yep. I bamboozled by the amount of huffing and puffing going on over “FinTech” and the end of banking as we know it! Payments! Online Banking Only! It’s like no one ever heard of ING Direct, or the Bank of Indiana and now, whooboy the banks are going to be disrupted and maybe replaced by a Silicon Valley start up and Peer-to-Peer Lending! It’s all a lot of “lookitme”.
O. Felix Culpa
OT, but the grey lady just had a news alert that Bernie is laying off hundreds of campaign workers to focus efforts on “winning” California.
Mnemosyne
@p.a.:
@Miss Bianca:
He’s not big on traditional musicals (like “Oklahoma!” or stuff like that) but he likes theater, so he’s willing to go.
They’re also doing a production of “The Bodyguard,” but I’m willing to put those up for sale to someone who’s actually interested.
Mnemosyne
@Miss Bianca:
Also, my niece turned down “A Chorus Line,” so that will be a date night instead.
Major Major Major Major
@Feathers: We aren’t your grandfather’s distributed peer-to-peer mobile microlending framework. Here at Sweatshop Tech LLC, we ‘hire’ only the finest 21-year-old javascript contractors to help us change the world! Our mission is simple: to disrupt the traditional ‘dead-tree’ world of paper currency and replace it with PonziCoins: The World’s Best Value Store (Unless The Power Goes Out(tm)). We offer unlimited paid time-off that we’ll guilt you into not using, and off-site work trips to Napa, where we’ll guilt you into staying inside the whole time and pulling an 80-hour week while your girlfriend tours wineries without you. Enjoy our gourmet food, on-site optometry and dentistry, and nap rooms. Sweatshop Tech: You’ll Never Have To Go Home Again!
p.a.
@Mnemosyne:
I personally have never seen people spontaneously break out in song, so I’m not a musical guy myself.
Recently saw an adaptation of Chekov’s The Seagull titled Stupid #*%!$&@ Bird; audience-participation crap where the main character Konstantin harangues the audience about our lack of concern over the injustice of his lack of popularity and fame. By act 3 I believe most of us were rooting for the gun.
eclare
@Mnemosyne: Great lineup! Loved Hedwig…
Roger Moore
@Feathers:
It’s also a helpful excuse for why you’re ignoring inconvenient laws, no matter how justified their reasoning. We’re a disruptive force, and those laws imposing educational and licensing requirements on medical practitioners are just the old economy’s way of trying to shut us out!
Nick Reynolds
Uh…..BillMon basically owns political Twitter. He’s unquestionably the best.
Mnemosyne
@p.a.:
I will steal a line from Lin-Manuel Miranda about his wife and say that G is also someone who only likes good musicals.
A Ghost To Most
@Major Major Major Major:
Had too many jobs like that. That shit will kill your spirit.
Joel
@Major Major Major Major: Could be worse, you could have gone into science.
Mnemosyne
@Nick Reynolds:
DougJ is a connoisseur of political parody, which isn’t really Billmon’s bailiwick.
Another great parody account is Jack Kimble (@RepJackKimble), who claims to be a conservative Republican representing California’s 54th District. Many a political reporter embarrassed themselves by not double-checking the number of congressional districts in CA before writing about “Kimble.”
p.a.
@Nick Reynolds: I don’t tweet; sure wish he’d go back to long-form blogging. Top rate stuff.
Billmon on Georgie’s great Iraq adventure (quoting Hirohito): “Despite the best that has been done by everyone… the war situation has developed not necessarily to Japan’s advantage…”
A Ghost To Most
@p.a.:
I have had this nightmare before. I always wake up in a cold sweat.
BillinGlendaleCA
@Major Major Major Major:
CONGRATULATIONS!
@Major Major Major Major: I feel exactly the same way. Would prefer to tell people I work in something respectable, like porn, or fast food, or being a ragpicker. I fucking hate everything about this field and most of the people who work in it are utterly horrible.
Mnemosyne
@BillinGlendaleCA:
MasterCard still has one of my all-time favorite commercials, where a woman is talking about the wonderful, romantic vacation to Italy she always wanted to take with her workaholic boyfriend Tom, and at the end the hot guy at all the romantic hotspots with her says to her (in Italian), “Who’s Tom?”
ETA: It was especially funny because the woman in the commercial was normal person pretty, not TV pretty.
BillinGlendaleCA
@Mnemosyne: CA-54 is a really picturesque district. I’ve enjoyed many a day there, not a lot of substance though.
satby
@Major Major Major Major: Hey, I worked there too!
khead
I will be the contrarian with the hot take.
It’s not that good.
It’s a lot better if you are steeped in TED talks.
If not then, well, you’ve seen it before.
p.a.
Cruz-Fiorina! It’s official. 2 dartboard-worthy personalities.
BillinGlendaleCA
@CONGRATULATIONS!: True, with porn when you get fucked there usually some degree of enjoyment; or so I’ve heard.
Bill Arnold
The truly scary thing about that Prof. Jeff Jarvis piece is that if he had first filed the edges off, and then attached a donation machine to it, he could have grifted some decent money.
Mnemosyne
Totally random, but if people see lamh36 later tonight, we should advise her to hit some of the hot new restaurants in Oakland while she’s in the Bay Area. I’ve heard they’re having quite the nice little renaissance on that side of the bay right now, but people who live in the area can probably advise her better.
singfoom
I mean, the satire is kind of funny, especially if you’re in tech and get the buzzword salad that he made, but after reading the medium post by the real Jeff Jarvis, any humor I found in the piece is lost in the fact that this Rurik Bradbury is a fucking asshole who has caused unneeded and undeserved grief to Jeff Jarvis.
Couldn’t he, I dunno, have a parody account on twitter that doesn’t mess with someone who is real? Or am I being a grandpa?
singfoom
@Major Major Major Major:
Most likely you have an innate appreciation of problem solving. People who don’t have that need people who can solve problems. Then they used your work to make money. And since it made people money, they kept you around?
Upset at the lack of coding standards? Gotta write a coding style guide. Then, update your Jenkins build to fail if someone breaks the coding style guide.
cokane
i can appreciate what he does, but it’s a little too try hard to actually make me laugh.
Shana
@Mnemosyne: Mazel tov! A friend in Chicago is doing the same sort of thing and I’m paying for the Hamilton tickets as a previously-promised gift.
? Martin
@Feathers:
Disruption is a very specific thing that gets applied about 100x more broadly than it should. Basically disruption is simply about a low-end product coming in to fill an overserved market. Most of the things called ‘disruption’ aren’t low-end or aren’t attacking an overserved market. That’s not Christianson’s fault, and it is a bag of stupid if you consider all of the non-disruptive things to be disruptive.
The primary driver of tech is as I stated a number of threads back, that it’s a shift from marginal to fixed cost balanced out by the ability to scale to levels that traditional manufacturing could never reach. That’s most obvious in the App Store economy where a fixed amount of effort to create an app can then (under the right conditions) net hundreds of millions of units sold with zero recurring cost. At even $0.99 for the app, you can take almost no capital cost and turn tens of millions in profits.
People focus too much on the unpredictability of when it does and doesn’t work and overlook the fact that the scenario was theoretically impossible prior to the internet and the ability to get global distribution at no cost. That same dynamic has effectively killed newspapers and is slowly killing everything from taxis to shopping malls to television.
But the effect of no (or effectively no) marginal cost of products on traditional markets is one you ignore at your peril. And the impact of that is felt most strongly by organized labor and will continue to be.
AnotherBruce
When is Baud! going to announce his running mate? Sorry, Carly is already spooken for. Carly and Cruz, a match made in the center of the earth.
? Martin
@Peale:
Until they realize that the weak link in finance has been and will be identity, none of it is going anywhere because it will always be either too untrustworthy or too transactionally expensive. Once someone really cracks how to present and confirm identity in a (reasonably) non-hackable way and puts that out for all to use, then things will get interesting. Apple has all the technical pieces in TouchID/ApplePay, but I’m losing faith that either they are interested in leveraging it any further than they have already, or that they can get the agreements with identity anchors (social security, DMVs, etc), which is a shame. Hopefully someone will get there.
But it does seem as though the fintech folks are almost deliberately obtuse to the actual problem they need to solve.
BillinGlendaleCA
@AnotherBruce: Good News! Baud! said this morning that in light of last night’s primary results, he’s re-positioning his campaign for the general election. I’m sure a VP announcement is in the offing.
RSR
Great post title.
Following the meandering path from the archived post, through twitter, to the PopeHat website yielded: “the ancient, deadly, and noble art of satire” which, yes, exactly.
David ?Canadian Anchor Baby? Koch
.@BorowitzReport: is really good at parody
People should also check out https://twitter.com/IndieVoterGuy He’s a scream.
AnotherBruce
@BillinGlendaleCA: I think that very recently, we called “re-positioning” flip flopping. Whatever, I think if Baud! pulls the right strings, he can bag Chris Christie. I hear the guy is desperate.
Actually there is so much so wrong with this post.
satby
OT, but my niece just put up a cool T-shirt she’s selling in her Etsy shop, all proceeds go to the Chicago area rescue Precious Pets Almost Home. Another redheaded rescuer in the family, I’m so proud!
Mike J
Republicans don’t understand loyalty at all. They’ll throw people under the bus at the first sign that they aren’t PC enough.
D58826
well somethings never change
MomSense
@Mnemosyne:
Double woot!
LAO
O/T: since we haven’t had a Bundy Bunch post in weeks, I can’t help my self. http://media.oregonlive.com/oregon-standoff/other/2016/04/27/USETHISONEPOSTBUNDY.pdf
Crazy filing by Ammon’s lawyer. It fits the definition of a defense attorney that gives no fucks. It’s long. If you don’t feel like reading the whole thing, just check out the footnotes and page 23.
AnotherBruce
@D58826: Any guesses out there of how much melanin this kid had?
BillinGlendaleCA
@AnotherBruce:
That’d be a big catch!
BillinGlendaleCA
@LAO: I’m sure Adam will be hurt, sounds like you found a new dealer.
LAO
@BillinGlendaleCA: he has been terribly unreliable of late.
Miss Bianca
@LAO: Dr. Silverman hasn’t given you a shot in a while, eh? ; )
ETA: Bill got there first…Holy God…is it my imagination, or is this guy as totally off the hook as his client?
LAO
@Miss Bianca: yes. Yes he is. (The Nevada judge kicked him out of the courtroom audience for using his cellphone — you should seen the whining). Lol.
MomSense
@D58826:
It didn’t seem like these officers see their role as serving the people in the community. Terrible.
In other news, the Dems are organizing against the announcement that Obama administration is about to take action to lower the cost of prescription drugs. Pelosi is spearheading opposition. It’s a miracle we passed the ACA.
Miss Bianca
@MomSense: WTF…*why*?
BillinGlendaleCA
@LAO: Heh, guess you got tired of Waiting for my Man.
LAO
@BillinGlendaleCA: ??
Mike J
@Miss Bianca: Why is not the question. Until there’s a story from someplace reputable, it’s not true.
Miss Bianca
@Mike J: I sit corrected.
Trollhattan
@BillinGlendaleCA:
And yuuuge bag!
Matt McIrvin
@Feathers: I remember “disruption” as a big thing from the first Internet bubble in the late 90s. Wikipedia says Clayton Christensen popularized it around 1995-97. (I said 2002 because of the war-on-terror nonsense.)
MomSense
@Miss Bianca:
Democrats push back.
@Mike J:
WTF??
PurpleGirl
@satby: I like her buttons, good comments on them.
sinnedbackwards
@Technocrat: I learned a lot about how en-ghi-neers and I think differently many years ago when I discovered that the way to turn Windows 3 off was to push the ON symbol, and the way to turn my Motorola flip-phone on was to push the OFF button.
Don’t they think we understand toggles? Like from childhood we don’t deal with light SWITCHES?
sinnedbackwards
@Major Major Major Major: Think of how much you can save on rent! Particularly in Silicon Frisco!
Miss Bianca
@MomSense: Wankers. If this is true, I am disgusted.
redshirt
@Feathers: Pshaw! I was working 80 hours a week disruptin’ back in 1999.
bago
What Martin said. That’s why people keep talking about the cloud. Instant horizontal AND vertical scalability. With the right config, you don’t even have to lift a finger to balance your load. With Analytics packages just an include away, suddenly everyone has business intelligence coming out of their ears.
Yes, I have been watching the Xamarin conference. Why do you ask?