Sort of Maybe a Bit Like Friday Recipe Exchange on Monday: Do NOT Try This at Home Edition!!!!!

Alton Brown has been tinkering again. He’s invented a way to make ice cream in under 10 seconds. The video is below. Whatever you do, do not try this at home!

Bon appetit! And open thread.

87 replies
  1. 1
    NotMax says:

    Happy to try this at home.

    Just not at my home.


  2. 2
    jl says:

    Carbonated ice cream? I want some, but will wait for the app for that. Hope it comes out soon.

    Edit: Oh, wait, this a Balloon Juice. I demand a recipe post with simple easy step by step instructions right away. Or this is not a full service blog. At all. Despite all of Cole’s empty promises (euphemism alert).

  3. 3
    Technocrat says:

    Alton Brown is a food god. I am genuinely an AB fanboy. At the same time, I acknowledge that his recipes are designed solely for wealthy obsessive compulsives.

  4. 4
    daves910 says:

    I think the store will continue to get my ice cream dollar.
    OT but interesting, I hope, the only known recording of Virginia Woolf, it’s on the BBC and good god, what a posh accent. Makes the queen sound like a cockney slut.

  5. 5
    Origuy says:

    There’s a post over at Pharyngula that evolved (as they do) into a discussion of food and American Indian food in particular. One comment mentioned a Canadian cooking show called Cooking with the Wolfman hosted by a BC First Nations man who is a classically trained chef. There are some recipes on that site that sound delicious. His show is carried on some cable networks in Canada and the US that target American Indians/First Nations.

  6. 6
    redshirt says:

    I’m in no rush.

    Remember when iced cream was a months long endeavor?

    Pepperidge Farm remembers.

  7. 7
    Mnemosyne says:


    G is a fan, and he calls him “the anal-retentive chef.” Towards the end of “Good Eats,” there was a definitely resemblance.

    We’re hooked on “Cutthroat Kitchen” but IMO the best parts are when Brown confides to the camera what the contestant just did wrong. He’s not always right, but it’s interesting to hear.

  8. 8
    dmsilev says:

    I’ve made ice cream using liquid nitrogen many times. Maybe not ten seconds, but certainly under a minute. And it’s pretty good stuff.

    It’s a standard party trick for any grad students with easy access to LN2 (i.e. pretty much any chemist, biologist or physicist, and a bunch of other fields as well).

  9. 9
    ThresherK says:

    Lemme guess (I didn’t peek, I swear): The fire extinguisher?

    Because I can’t figure out how he could get liquid nitrogen to do this.

  10. 10
    A Ghost To Most says:

    I learned a lot from Good Eats.

  11. 11
    dmsilev says:

    @ThresherK: Yep. It’s a CO2 extinguisher, and rapid expansion of gas == cooling.

  12. 12
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @ThresherK: yep, very big fire extinguisher.

  13. 13
    Kathleen says:

    @daves910: I heard that this morning! Also heard the observation that she had a great laugh. I haven’t read her stories since I graduated from college in 19 mumble mumble, but I liked her writing.

  14. 14
    NotMax says:


    Enjoyed many parts of Good Eats.

    It’s been disappointing and sad to watch Brown slowly morph into a poor man’s Bud Collyer (with more than a soupçon of Monty Hall) since then.

  15. 15
    AkaDad says:

    Bernie is like Superman ice cream. Hillary is like Rocky Road.


  16. 16

    I am not all the impressed by Alton Brown’s and America’s Test Kitchen’s so called scientific approach to cooking. Cooking is like a party trick, in this school of thought, every recipe a different trick to master, when in reality there are lot of commonalities even across different cuisines.

    I prefer Jacques Pepin, Hubert Keller, Julia Child, Sarah Moulton types as TV chefs than the Alton Brown and Chris Kimball types, who like to make everything super complicated.

  17. 17
    Mnemosyne says:


    I would blame the Food Network more — they pretty much don’t have cooking shows anymore. It’s all competition shows. He’s just going along with his contract.

    I do like “Cutthroat Kitchen,” though, because it’s a lot more goofy and surreal than shows like “Chopped,” which take themselves WAY too seriously.

  18. 18
    Miss Bianca says:

    @Adam L Silverman:

    completely off-topic, but just for you…couldn’t resist, given the source and the subject matter:

    two points:

    1. Hearing about ’em is is not enough – I WANT TO SEE THESE COSTUMES.

    2. And remember, as our interviewee is careful to point out: “show girls were NOT strippers.” Got that? all righty, then…

  19. 19

    Okay, since we’re talking about cooking shows, can someone tell me how to access season 2 of the “Great British Baking Show” via streaming? My PBS app just has lame-ass previews. TIA!

  20. 20
    NotMax says:


    Surprising, too (in an American posh sort of way) is Teddy Roosevelt’s voice.

    Closer to a tenor, too, than one might have presumed.

  21. 21


    I’ve made ice cream using liquid nitrogen many times. Maybe not ten seconds, but certainly under a minute. And it’s pretty good stuff.

    There’s now at least one (small) chain of ice cream stores that will make LN2 ice cream for you while you wait and watch. I just happen to have gone there for the first time this past weekend. It’s on the expensive side, especially given that they aren’t using premium ingredients, but the whole production is a lot of fun.

  22. 22
    jl says:

    @schrodinger’s cat: America’s Test Kitchen’s is ‘scientific’? I didn’t know that. My folks are addicted to that show. I am mainly fascinated by eerily perfect building and countryside where it is supposedly shot.

    A commenter recently gave a link to James Townsend and son 18th century cooking youtubes, which seems to be aimed at historical re-enactments for East Coast US. I like their approach, if you can’t bake it, roast or fry it, you tie it up in a bag and boil it. Lots of kidney suet and lard. Raisins get upgraded to ‘plums’. Nutmeg in everything. Butter. They used paw-paw leaves to wrap up some food for cooking in one recipe, which I thought was cool.

  23. 23
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Miss Bianca: I have a coffee table book I inherited from my Dad entitled Las Vegas. Its basically a pictorial history through the late 70s/early 80s. An entire chapter is dedicated to the showgirls and their costumes.

  24. 24
    ThresherK says:

    @Mnemosyne: I like “Worst Cooks in America” sometimes, because unless one was brought up to do some cooking, some of the things they mess up are all-too-familiar, and then it’s nice to see the learning curve.

  25. 25
    Steeplejack says:


    I’ve been rewatching old episodes of Good Eats on the Cooking Channel (11:00 and 11:30 p.m. EDT on weeknights, repeats at 3:00 and 3:30 a.m.), and, while what you say about Alton Brown is true, I’ve been surprised at the volume of solid, no-nonsense advice he provides along with the recipes. Just saw his episode on tea and am going to use some info from that to experiment with my iced-tea recipe.

  26. 26

    @jl: They break down a recipe and then try to perfect it. Then they throw away the “experiments” that didn’t work. Its good TV but not a great way to learn how to cook.

    ETA: May be “scientific” doesn’t exactly describe it.

  27. 27
    raven says:

    After months of work, the FBI finally has a way into the San Bernardino iPhone. In a court filing today, prosecutors told the court the new method for breaking into the phone is sound, and Apple’s assistance is no longer required. “The government has now successfully accessed the data stored on Farook’s iPhone,” the filing reads, “and therefore no longer requires the assistance from Apple.” The filing provides no further details on the nature of the new method. The result effectively finishes the court fight that has consumed Apple since February is now officially over.

  28. 28
    Just One More Canuck says:

    @daves910: who’s to say she’s not – you don’t know what she does in her off hours

  29. 29
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @raven: The follow on problem is that the company that helped them with this is an Israeli subsidiary of a larger Chinese firm. So now the Israelis and the Chinese have the ability to force break into an iPhone.

  30. 30
    Steeplejack says:


    Link or source?

  31. 31
    chopper says:

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    i don’t agree with any of this. brown’s cooking, at least the actual recipes and techniques he puts forth like on good eats, aren’t very complicated at all; his recipes are no more complicated than any others i’ve found. he does like to explain various bits about why this particular technique works/what it does/the science behind it, or bust some myth or other (which often helps make the recipe easier), but it really isn’t very complicated and that stuff isn’t at all necessary to make the food. you can never watch a single episode and just make the recipe off food network’s website and do just great.

    same is true for CI/ATK. their recipes tend to be pretty simple. they publish tons of editions on quick meals or crock pot recipes or ‘5-ingredient dinners’ that are really very easy to make. but they like to point out what makes the recipe work or what makes it different from the traditional way of doing it.

    the thing that tends to drive me nuts about CI is the way the recipe backstories are written; they tend to have this insufferable nature to them, like all “so i added a dash of beef stock and then i knew i had attained absolute perfection” where you want to reach through the magazine and throttle the motherfucker. but once you realize you can skim that part and get to the actual recipe it’s a lot easier to deal with.

    i dunno, maybe it’s cause i cook all the time, but neither source seems all that complicated.

  32. 32
    NotMax says:

    @Adam L. Silverman

    One of the great names (in the “I’m not making this up” sense) was that of dancer/designer/choreographer Ffolliott “Fluff” LeCoque, the person behind some of the most successful Las Vegas extravaganzas. Obit from this past December.

  33. 33
    Technocrat says:


    G is a fan, and he calls him “the anal-retentive chef.”

    A perfect description. My wife and I are huge Good Eats nerds, and we used to joke about Alton Brown recipes:


    1) Hop a quick flight to Kansas.
    2) pick about 1/4 bushel of wheat

    BBQ Ribs:

    1) Take 1/4 cup of fresh black peppercorns
    2) Roast peppercorns at 300 degrees for 14 hours
    3) With a small nail file, shave half of each peppercorn into a bowl. put aside.


    I joke, but I really do love the guy. His passion for and knowledge of food are amazing.

  34. 34
    Miss Bianca says:

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    Is “America’s Test Kitchen” the same crew that puts out “Cook’s Illustrated” magazine? Never seen the show but have always loved “Cooks Illustrated” – so. freaking. geeky. and obsessive. about food. I love that.

    @chopper: ah, ha ha, sounds like what I love about CI is what you hate!

  35. 35
    debbie says:

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    Clearly, Julila Child and Jacques Pepin are without equal. Did you ever watch the series they did together? They’d each make their own version of dishes. They were great friends but bickered often about white pepper vs. black pepper. I can’t find it on youtube, but one time, Julia was making something and she pointedly said that since it was her version, she’d be using white pepper. Jacques replied with a sad look, “Pity!” You probably have to see it to see how funny it was and how representative of a very long and dear friendship.

    I don’t know much about Alton Brown, but I think Chris Kimble et al. are great on techniques. Yes, they often make recipes more complicated than they need be. But their hints for making bread pudding less smushy, for instance, are very helpful.

  36. 36

    @Miss Bianca: Same crew. I do like the taste tests and equipment corner.@chopper: I cook all the time too. I will give you an example of the wastefulness of ATK. They were making Pho, to make the beef broth, they used ground beef and then threw away the beef.

  37. 37
    dmsilev says:

    @Roger Moore: I’ll have to check that out. Also there is, or perhaps was, a similar store in the Chicago area. Can’t remember the name off-hand though.

    Really, if you have a hankering for LN2 ice cream, the easiest way is to find some grad students or techies and invite them to a party. Pro tip: Chemists seem to know the best booze-in-ice-cream recipes.

  38. 38
    Miss Bianca says:


    Yes, TR’s voice in recordings always shocked me – with such a “he man” image, I was expecting a bass-baritone!

    I {heart} Fluff LeCoque. That one would definitely have gone on the “Funny Names” list I used to keep when I was indexing the Guardian (back in the days when it was still “the Manchester Guardian”). Along with Benedict Nightingale and Canaan Banana. Ah…good times in the information biz…

  39. 39
    LAO says:

    Is there nothing duct tape can’t do?

  40. 40

    @debbie: Julia and Jacques cooking together are my among my favorite cooking shows.

  41. 41
    E. says:

    Do you all remember the Bundy-supporting rancher from New Mexico who heeded Bundy’s call to travel to Malheur and renounce his federal grazing permit? Adam Sewell, felon, rancher, and patriot, tore his permit up and vowed no longer to be a subject of the oppressive government forces. Well except now the Forest Service decided to let him graze a whole lot more cows and so he, you know, signed up again.

  42. 42
    JPL says:

    @schrodinger’s cat: He did a series with his daughter and at times, it appeared that she wasn’t enjoying it. Now Jacques can be seen in the kitchen with his granddaughter.
    I always like him.

  43. 43
    chopper says:


    yeah, it’s funny. but he’s also pretty clear that ‘regular X will do just fine here’. i think it’s a thing in many TV chefs that nobody wants to come off like sandra lee and her shows about cutting hot dogs into cereal or microwaving a bowl of pizza.

    shit, every time i see a reference to pepin i remember a show of his i watched and he was showing the TV audience how to make i dunno scrambled eggs or something. he starts throwing in creme fraiche and then at the end he’s all okay, now the last step and he whips out a huge truffle and starts shaving it on the top. he’s all this is what really gives it the flavor. oh yeah, for all of us at home who happen to have a $200 truffle just lying around, thanks dogg.

  44. 44
    Cermet says:

    Have an active refrigerated stirring ice creme maker; works well but allows one to make far, far too rich ice creme. In fact, trying to make low fat/no fat ice creme is not doable due to the lack of access and/or understanding of how to use the vast array of special ingredients needed to thicken and make it eatable. That is the trap, danger and problem with making one’s own – really have to make high end, high quality or it is awful. The upside of making real, high quality ice creme is that this ice creme is far too good to resist and not over eat …! Oh well, still fun.

  45. 45
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @LAO: Nope, the Mythbusters proved that.

  46. 46
    Miss Bianca says:



  47. 47
    chopper says:

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    to be fair, if you’re going to make pho right you’ll be left with some meat that has no flavor left at all. when i make homemade pho stock i give the leftover meat bits to the dog cause it doesn’t taste like anything at all anymore.

    the bones tho, they can keep working.

  48. 48
    dmsilev says:


    Is there nothing duct tape can’t do?

    Of course not. The Force in the Star Wars films is really duct tape: it has a light side and a dark side, and holds the universe together.

  49. 49
    chopper says:

    @Miss Bianca:

    “i was having trouble properly replying to miss bianca on the internet; but, when i tried again and added a bit of snark, i knew i had achieved perfection”

  50. 50
    lamh36 says:

    today I’m actually leaving the house for the first time since Friday. I’ve been feeling bad so haven’t done anything to process the whole job mess.

    I’m still irrationally mad about it. a thought occurred to me in my sickness and it made me mad all over again…the idea hat my former Supe knew I had applied and interviewed…NOLA is small, esp in Micro. So the idea that the Micro mgr discussed stuff with him made me see red…it’s probably just paranoia of a sick mind but it was enough to piss me off even more.. but I will say I don’t put it past these folks at all. the consequence of it being such a small group here in NOLA. they all are same age and contemporaries of each other.

    I’m planning to spend this week de-compressing. I still have to work with dude til maybe June. but as I’ve said before I have a poke face but I don’t have the ability to be fake with folks I’m pissed at .

    Anyway, I saw the movie Big Fat Greek Wedding 2. I’m a big fan of the original. If you are too, you’ll love it. It as great to see literally ALL the side family characters from the original. I came away from it feeling better than I did after Batman vs Superman.

    After the movie we went to our local Copeland’s Restaurant. I had the “Tomato Basil Cajun Chicken Pasta” and a lil bit of my cousin’s dessert, “Killed by Chocolate Cake”

  51. 51
    Miss Bianca says:



  52. 52
    NotMax says:


    As we’re sort of discussing TV cookery, will mention there are two who are undoubtedly highly skilled yet consistently manage to prepare and present dishes or meals I find unappealing.

    Bobby Flay and Jamie Oliver.

    Reaction is always “Yeah, I might try a nibble if there’s absolutely nothing else around to eat.”

    Oliver at least comes across as personally amiable. Flay, IMHO, is the Ted Cruz of TV chefs.

  53. 53
    LAO says:


    BTW, I’m totally embarrassed to admit, I alway thought it was duck tape. I learned the error of my ways about a year ago. I’m 46.

  54. 54
    chopper says:


    He did a series with his daughter and at times, it appeared that she wasn’t enjoying it.

    she also didn’t seem to ever be able to pick any of it up. i don’t understand how it’s possible to cook with jacques pepin and still not understand anything about cooking (even if he’s your dad) but apparently she was special.

  55. 55
    chopper says:


    the worst TV chef ever is guy fieri, hands down. talentless and a complete asshole. you know what really climbs my prick? the fact that that shitbag got famous.

  56. 56
    hamletta says:

    to make the beef broth, they used ground beef and then threw away the beef.

    Because…that’s what you do when you make broth, son. By the time a piece of meat has sat in a few gallons of water and simmered all day, there’s not much left except some flavorless muscle fibers.

  57. 57

    @lamh36: That tomato basil chicken looks so damn good! Have you ever tried to recreate it at home?

    Sorry about the work troubles. Been there, and I know how it can suck and spill over into your non-work life…

  58. 58
    debbie says:


    I agree about Flay. There was some series where he’d go head to head with a local chef and his look of outrage when he didn’t win was priceless.

    I’ve only ever seen Oliver on Oprah, which doesn’t count. I remember his special series on changing the school menus at some place in West Virginia. Tons of resistance at the beginning (his accent, I’m sure, didn’t help), but by the end, he had the kids and their parents eating better meals.


    Jacques has a new series (produced in 2015) where he’s cooking with his daughter and granddaughter. He seems happy with both of them. Maybe she figured it out.

  59. 59
    debbie says:


    Not to mention lousy table manners!

  60. 60
    NotMax says:


    Don’t even consider him a chef. He’s a culinary barker constantly in search of a midway.

  61. 61
    chopper says:


    to be fair, that there’s some protein. it seems stupid to full-on throw away food. mix it in with something or other or give it to the dog.

  62. 62
    bystander says:

    @NotMax: Just recently found out that Bud was June Collyer’s brother.

    I love New Scandinavian Cooking. The scenery is always great, they cook in the environment that inspired their dish. The ingredients border on the grocery list for the original Iron Chef from Japan. But you could still translate some of their things.

  63. 63
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @LAO: Duck tape is similar, but has cute little ducks on it.😊

  64. 64
    Steve in the ATL says:

    @LAO: In your defense (you’re not used to being on the other side!), it was originally called duck tape for its water repelling property. So you’re just being an old school purist. Much like when you hit a persimmon driver off the first tee.

  65. 65
    NotMax says:


    Used to occasionally tune in to Oliver’s The Naked Chef series. One nice thing about it was that he did all the work in a kitchen much closer to the kind of cramped quarters most people have.

  66. 66
    chopper says:


    and he did a lot of stuff without equipment. like making bread dough using a pile of flour on a countertop (though it’s not like the show ended with 15 minutes of him cleaning up the mess).

  67. 67
    Technocrat says:


    sandra lee and her shows about cutting hot dogs into cereal or microwaving a bowl of pizza

    Man, I laughed so hard at this. Poor Sandra Lee. And her Pillsbury Biscuit dough Belgian waffles.

  68. 68
    NotMax says:

    The food gods must be angry.

    Winds outside picked up enough to make the cottage shake a little and a large, heavy hardcover (The Microwave Gourmet, gift from Mom many years ago) just leaped off the cookbook shelf and crashed to the floor.


    Yes indeedy.

  69. 69
    bystander says:

    The Food tv guy whose restaurant was great was Chuck Hughes. Garde Manger in Montreal was fantastic. But it’s been awhile.

    Flay’s restaurants are great when he’s in the kitchen riding herd. Otherwise they become just sort of dull and rote.

  70. 70
    LAO says:

    @Steve in the ATL: OT: nothing interesting on PACER today. 😔 I really need a fix.

  71. 71
    chopper says:


    nothing, and i mean nothing, will ever beat the kwanzaa cake.

  72. 72
    Steve in the ATL says:

    @LAO: Here’s a sov cit attempting his chicanery in court:

  73. 73
    redshirt says:

    @NotMax: The only microwave cookery book the internet will ever need.

  74. 74
  75. 75
    redshirt says:

    Let’s try this.
    The only microwave cookbook the internet needs.

  76. 76
    LAO says:

    @Steve in the ATL: I hate to admit (1) I watched it yesterday and (2) I emailed it to Adam.

    I appreciate that judge.

  77. 77
    lamh36 says:

    @Betty Cracker: i have not yet BC…but not to toot my own home, but I can I might just have to try to make it myself!

  78. 78
    NotMax says:


    Based on the full meal pictured on the cover, ought not that be “Microwave Cooking for One Champion Sumo Wrestler?”


  79. 79
    redshirt says:

    @NotMax: “We’re gonna need a bigger microwave.”

  80. 80
    Shana says:

    @chopper: You’re absolutely right about Guy Fieri. If I knew how to do links I’d include it, but go search for the New York Times review of his restaurant. One of the funniest things I’ve ever read. Right up there with The Bloggess’ big metal chicken post.

  81. 81

    @JPL: I think he did a couple of seasons of that. I liked that too, his granddaughter is cute. I also like Pati’s Mexican cooking. She was too giggly in the first season, she toned it down in later ones. I like her recipes.

  82. 82
    chopper says:


    that was one of my favorite reviews. just a long series of questions. complete and utter takedown.

  83. 83
    debbie says:

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    Here’s info on Jacques’s current series, which apparently will be his last. :(

  84. 84
    Adam L Silverman says:

    @Steve in the ATL: I have a set of Wilson Staff 2s with persimmon wood drivers. Inherited them from my Dad.

  85. 85
    Paul in KY says:

    @lamh36: Hope you get to feelin better!

  86. 86
    Paul in KY says:

    @NotMax: My late uncle & alive 1st cousin partied with him years ago down in Bahamas or somewhere like that. Said he was fun to party with (B. Flay).

  87. 87
    bemused senior says:

    @Adam L Silverman: Many people know how to break into that phone. The whole episode was a charade, where Apple was trying to spread the idea that their phones were super secure and the company ready to die on the alter of consumer privacy, because they are about to get into the business of replacing credit cards with phone apps in a big way.

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