Late Night Schadenfreude Open Thread: Ripe to Rot

The Bush crime family, like its spirit animal the shark, are predators who have outlasted their more attractive primaeval competitors in the GOP clades by prioritizing simple vicious bloodlust over flexibility or intelligence. But with the ancient seas of WASP plutocracy drying up and a swarm of even more vicious new competitors evolving to compete in the shallows and the muck, current exemplar JEB! is not doing very well in this changing new environment. There is still plenty of flesh remaining on his carcass, however, so his retinue of remoras and pilot fish have yet to abandon him. Steve Benen, at MSNBC’s Maddowblog:

Broadly speaking, Plan A for members of Team Jeb was making their candidate look great. Nearly $30 million later, this strategy has clearly come up short. Plan B was making Donald Trump look awful, and that hasn’t gone well, either. But the Politico piece hints at a possible Plan C.

Mike Murphy, the Los Angeles-based ad man running Bush’s Right to Rise super PAC, isn’t about to leave the $75 million left in the group’s bank account unspent and is readying a 15-minute biographical film about Bush. According to another source close to Right to Rise, Murphy has been floating another tactical shift to potential supporters, suggesting that he might spend the bulk of the $75 million to carpet bomb Rubio, Cruz, Carson, Chris Christie – everyone but Trump. The thinking: Making the race into a binary choice between Bush and Trump might be the only way a majority of primary voters go with Bush.

… It’s hard to blame Bush’s super PAC, which is flush with cash, from looking for ways to create the head-to-head dynamic that might work to the former governor’s advantage. Bush’s odds of success are obviously dwindling, but if the party en masse were forced to choose between Trump and Jeb, the latter would probably be pretty competitive.

So, the thinking goes, Team Jeb could spend $75 million trying to get Republican voters to fall in love with Bush (an unlikely scenario), or use that money to tear down Trump (a fool’s gambit), but why bother? It’d probably be easier to devote the resources to bringing down the other candidates between Trump and Bush.

Why not go after just Cruz or just Rubio or just Carson? Because it’s difficult to say for sure where their supporters would go under such a scenario. The result is a bit like a mafia movie in which the don targets all the rival families at once, since anything less would lead to chaotic failure…

Note how metaphors about sharks and mafia dons come so naturally when you think about the Bushes. Also, to Mr. Pierce at Esquire, rabid dogs — “It’s Time for Jeb (!) to Old Yeller His Campaign“:

… To be completely fair, no candidate was less suited to the carnival of souls that this campaign has become than was Jeb (!). He had lots of money, and lots of influential friends, and he even had a mainly undeserved reputation as a Republican with the ability to reach out to minorities. Then, two things happened. He ran facefirst into I, Trump, who found in Jeb (!) the perfect foil—humorless, stuffy, and very easily pantsed on stage. Nobody could have anticipated how truly deformed one man could make our politics. But, for all that, Jeb (!) has proven to be an absolute lemon of a candidate. He has entirely different—​​but no less serious—​problems with English than his brother did. He couldn’t find spontaneity if you gave him the ghost of Robin Williams as a guide. And, let us never forget that The Base has decided that his surname is a curse unto 10 generations, and Jeb (!) is nowhere near the pol to turn all that around in one election cycle. Rubio is younger. Cruz is more conservative. Fiorina is a bigger prevaricator. Ben Carson is crazier. Rand Paul is quirkier. And He, Trump is more, well, everything. Even if you put him at the top of the Single Digit Club, where’s the room for Jeb (!) to run in a Republican primary field?​

It’s not your year, big fella. Just admit it. Don’t go to Vegas next week and stand up there and get your trou’ dropped on you again. (I mean, Jesus H. Christ on a package tour of the Balkans, Rubio embarrassed you last time.) Maintain some dignity. Take the campaign out behind the shed and come back alone. There’s no hope for it now. It’s suffering, Jeb (!), and only you can do it.

Since I lack Mr. Pierce’s generous spirit, I don’t care if JEB! drops out early or late, as long as he’s wasting GOP money attacking the other Repub candidates — and presumably causing them to waste money attacking him in turn — that might otherwise have gone to attacking HRClinton (or whomever the Democratic nominee turns out to be).

118 replies
  1. 1
    The Republic of Stupity says:

    The Bush crime family, like its spirit animal the shark…

    You’re giving sharks a bad name they don’t deserve when you say this…

  2. 2
    Anne Laurie says:

    @The Republic of Stupity: We can’t always live up to the best of our spirit animals, that’s the tragedy of being human. (Or human-ish, if you’re talking about the Bush family.)

  3. 3
    The Republic of Stupity says:

    @Anne Laurie: Sharks are amazing animals…

    Go to youtube and look for footage of great whites hunting seals, if you’ve never done it…

    Some of the footage is astonishing…

    Not sure what animal I’d be willing to identify w/ the Bushes…




  4. 4
    Amir Khalid says:

    Jeb’s not doing well enough to be a contender, yet not quite badly enough to be dismissed as a no-hoper. He doesn’t have enough money in his campaign, and must cut corners; yet he has too much super-PAC money to just drop out, because then the donors would be mad at him. Jeb plainly doesn’t have the political chops to run for president, but either won’t or can’t quit the race. Absent other options, Jeb’s campaign will eventually grind to a halt. No doubt, those who like to savour their Schadenfreude will want the process to be as slow and painful as possible.

  5. 5
    Mike J says:

    @Amir Khalid: Please get to the airport and pick up your airplanes.

  6. 6

    @Amir Khalid:
    The question is… who else? We’re seeing a ‘not Romney’ series of rises and flameouts. Bush does remain steady… in fifth. If they all die and Trump explodes, which is by no means out of the question, he has a shot. I’ll grant you that’s a lot of ‘if’s, but Trump is a clown, and I have no idea if he can last. I only know what got him to the lead and what’s keeping him there – the hard, overt racism the Republican Party has been denying itself for years, like that cake in the refrigerator.

  7. 7
    🚸 Martin says:

    On of my favorite Bob’s Burgers lines, Louise talking about how boring one of her classmates is: “If she was a spice, she’d be flour! If she was a book, she’d be two books!”

    I guess that’s Jeb?’s challenge – make flour everyone’s 2nd favorite ice cream flavor. Unfortunately their first choice seems to goebbels.

  8. 8

    Sometimes I think I should go back and erase my comments. There’s just nothing NEW to say in this cycle. Trump is succeeding through racism. Jeb:( is a loser. Who the fuck knows what’s going on. It’s the only viable analysis to every situation that comes up.

  9. 9
    BGinCHI says:

    If the GOP thinks that Trump as the frontrunner is the worst thing that can happen, then wait until they ratfuck him out of the lead.

    With this much support, and this much money, Trump is going to run as an Independent if given the slightest provocation.

    It has no downside for him. It’s even more suited to his brand than the current path which involves messy debates and ground games.

  10. 10
    sm*t cl*de says:

    no candidate was less suited to the carnival of souls that this campaign has become

    Note to self: Must re-watch Carnival of Souls.

  11. 11
    sm*t cl*de says:

    @The Republic of Stupity:

    Not sure what animal I’d be willing to identify w/ the Bushes…

    “Guinea worm” is still available.

  12. 12
    Peale says:

    @BGinCHI: I don’t know. I think in the end 3rd party trump gets 4%. Enough to maybe swing two-three states to Hillary. Just enough for him to take the blame for the GOP loss, but not enough to actually cost the GOP the election. I don’t think he’s going to spend $500m of his own money.

  13. 13
    Amir Khalid says:

    @Mike J:
    They ain’t MY planes. It looks like they were abandoned there by the Icelandic owner when MASkargo’s lease ran out and MAS didn’t want to renew. (It’s a common airline-biz practice to lease one’s planes from such companies, as I understand.) It’s a pity there’s no bazillionaire to buy the planes and refurbish them as private jets. But I appreciate that running a 747 as a private jet is a quick way for a rich dude to become a poor dude.

  14. 14
    Amir Khalid says:


    I don’t think he’s going to spend $500m of his own money.

    Who’s going to stop him? He’ll still have billions left. Blowing half a billion wouldn’t put a crimp in his lifestyle or leave his children destitute.

  15. 15
    BGinCHI says:

    @Amir Khalid: Assuming Trump would cede his place in the spotlight of the Greatest Show on Earth is a piss poor assumption.

    You are right: money is no issue where ego is concerned.

  16. 16
    mdblanche says:

    Rubio is younger. Cruz is more conservative. Fiorina is a bigger prevaricator. Ben Carson is crazier. Rand Paul is quirkier. And He, Trump is more, well, everything.

    Trump is yoooger,

  17. 17
    David Koch says:

    @BGinCHI: but how are they gonna fatfuck him?

    If they had something on him they would have released by now. I mean this shit is driving them nutz. And it’s been going for 6 straight months.

    4 years ago when one of freaks rose they quickly dumped oppo material on them and they melted.

    It’s interesting how the Koch Brothers are scared of his retaliation so even they aren’t willing to fund run of the mill attack ads.

  18. 18
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    Jeebus, I thought our cops were bad: Florida burglary suspect eaten by alligator after fleeing police

    Watch yourself down there.

  19. 19
    amk says:

    BJ Mobile site appears much more cleaner.

    ETA. Hope desktop version is also fixed along the same lines.

  20. 20
    bemused says:

    As far as I can see, Trump is only in this game for massive attention and thoroughly enjoying the power of being the puppeteer manipulating the strings of the marionettes, his supporters, the GOP and the media. It’s hard to see him getting bored and quitting anytime soon.

  21. 21
    Zinsky says:

    After the catastrophic failure that was the George W. Bush presidency (which was stolen, never forget), I never thought I would be saying that I feel sorry for his pudgy, humorless brother, but I kind of do. Jeb is so out of his depth in this race that an intellectual featherweight like Marco Rubio seems sage and wise, by comparison. Jebbie should have stayed in the Sunshine State, cheating on Columba with rich, bleach-blonde divorcees and fleecing erstwhile Cuban real estate developers.

  22. 22
    Amir Khalid says:

    The notion that the Donald would want to stop this crazy ride before it ends up with him in the White House assumes that he realises he’d make a terrible president. Why should he believe any such thing? Doesn’t a Master of the Universe like him deserve to be president? And of course he’d be a great president. He’s the man who can make any deal happen.

  23. 23
    raven says:

    The morning calm.

  24. 24
    MattF says:

    Why does anyone think that Jeb! would do well against Clinton? By any rational standard, the gang hanging out of the windows of the Klown Kar are all weak candidates– and Jeb! shares that trait.

  25. 25
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @Amir Khalid: Rachel seems to think that ‘the Donald’ would find the job of President a bit too demanding of his time.

  26. 26
    Amir Khalid says:

    Pah. The Donald’s a boss. Bosses know how to delegate.

  27. 27
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @raven: We got some bad news yesterday from that land. My late BIL’s SIL passed away. I didn’t particularly care for my BIL but his wife’s sister was a class act, didn’t take any shit and alot of fun to be around. I’ll miss her.

  28. 28
    Schlemazel says:

    The Bush crime family, like its spirit animal the shark, are predators who have outlasted their more attractive primaeval competitors in the GOP clades by prioritizing simple vicious bloodlust over flexibility or intelligence. But with the ancient seas of WASP plutocracy drying up and a swarm of even more vicious new competitors evolving to compete in the shallows and the muck, current exemplar JEB! is not doing very well in this changing new environment. There is still plenty of flesh remaining on his carcass, however, so his retinue of remoras and pilot fish have yet to abandon him.

    This right here is Pulitzer level material and should be preserved for posterity. Future generation need to know not everyone was a blind, deaf, moron

  29. 29
    raven says:

    @BillinGlendaleCA: Aw crap. I’m afraid we are getting to the age where we are losing people regularly. It’s bad enough when they are older but a buddy of mine just lost a 30 year old daughter suddenly.

  30. 30
    David Koch says:


    Jebbie should have stayed in the Sunshine State, cheating on Columba

    What makes you think he’s not cheating – from everything I’ve read, he cheats all the time (like any aristocrat). He even had an affair with Katherine Harris.

  31. 31
    Schlemazel says:

    @sm*t cl*de:
    Guinea worm would be a good choice if JEB? dies & takes the clan with him. President Carters efforts to wipe out the Guinea worm have been successful so it no longer torments is home range. It would be nice to think the same could be said of the Bushes.

  32. 32
    MattF says:

    Very OT. There’s a Duckman Wiki! And it seems to be active. Thank dog for the internet.

  33. 33
    Baud says:

    @raven: It makes me miss the wedding period and I hated that period.

  34. 34

    He even had an affair with Katherine Harris.

    Eww. Ish. Yuck. Barf.

  35. 35
    raven says:

    @Baud: I had a couple.

  36. 36
    SFAW says:

    Site comment for Alain –
    You may already have noted this – I’m too lazy to go through the various note/comments wherein you describe the various fixes/updates – but the ad along the right-side top is for the new Star Wars film, “The Force Awake”

    In other words, the last however-many columns of pixels for that ad are either truncated or not displayed or whatever.

    Apologies if this is a Known Bug which you have noted multiple times. As I said, I’m lazy.

  37. 37
    Another Holocene Human says:

    Mike Murphy, the Los Angeles-based ad man running Bush’s Right to Rise super PAC, isn’t about to leave the $75 million left in the group’s bank account unspent

    Well okay then!

  38. 38
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @🚸 Martin: Trump’s more of a Goering. Well, Mussolini, really. It’s like they were cast from the same mold.

  39. 39
    SFAW says:

    @Amir Khalid:

    Bosses know how to delegate.

    Some do – I can them “managers.” Some just know how to give orders – I call them “bosses.”

    Some know how to pass out work and not follow up effectively (known as “abdication.”)

    It’s not clear – other than “The Apprentice,” perhaps (“perhaps” because I’ve never watched it) – that Trump is an effective anything, outside of “self-promoter.”

  40. 40
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @David Koch: Do GOPers not care about this kind of stuff now, or did he inherit his father’s Bush pass?

  41. 41
    SFAW says:

    @Another Holocene Human:
    Have they ever cared, when it was someone they didn’t hate?

  42. 42

    @Zinsky: Feh. He’ll still be employed, have money in the bank, a revenue stream from the grift mill, a big cushy safety net to fall into – would it that we were all such fortunate ones.

    I feel sorry for the Right to Rise troll, that person is just sad, so very sad.

  43. 43
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @David Koch: Yeah, you raise an interesting question. Trump has been bleating everything the Koch Bros stand against on tax/financial/economic policy. Why don’t they pull the terminate lever? They’ve got egos at least as big as Donald’s.

    I think JEB!’s campaign is as incompetent as he is. It’s pretty sad that this guy makes Romney look like a good manager. He certainly wasn’t a good governor of Massachusetts. And the Romney camp couldn’t beat Obama and indulged in fantasy again. Yet JEB! isn’t one fifth the candidate Romney was. Pretty astounding.

  44. 44
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @SFAW: I don’t actually know. Not since 2008, I think, but I can think of a few cases of GOP pols forced to resign in disgrace for affairs since then. None of them were executives. (Although the accusations against Nikki Haley might have just been bullshit anyway.) Sanford was forced out and returned in triumph. OTOH, David Vitter just got denied for governor.

    It must matter to SOME GOPers and those enigmatic swing voters. Just not very many of them.

    I would also suspect if the GOP pol who cheats and gets caught is not part of the Evangelical-Fundamentalist world, then the preacher-cons will be quick to condemn them. If they are part of that world you’ll see Sanford-esque attempts at rehabilitation and plenty of the sheep will baa baa on cue.

  45. 45
    Punchy says:

    The “wasting money atacking each other” trope is dumb and pointless. Their money supply is ENDLESS. They could blow $200…$300 mill on the primary, and that account would be refilled the next day with $500 mill or more. Attacking each other is great, but the money aspect of it is a non-starter. They could throw billions into this if they needed to.

  46. 46
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: That’s not half as weird as the criminal who jumped into a dolphin tank and was murdered by dolphins. They don’t eat humans–they just though he was annoying for some reason (if he was male and the dolphins were male that would probably be enough reason because dolphins are assholes) and deliberately drowned him. Dolphins weigh a lot more than a grown man and can hold their breath longer so drowning humans is easy for them.

    Carl Hiassen wrote about it in one of his “stranger than fiction” tales. Real episode from South Florida.

    (The other story there–why does the state of Florida allow people to pen megafauna like dolphins in tiny tanks?!?! Oh, that’s right, “small government”.)

  47. 47
    Amir Khalid says:

    The Donald is yoooge and classy at all those things. More seriously, I don’t think he’s all that great a boss either, since he’s never really been a subordinate.

  48. 48
    bemused says:

    @Amir Khalid:

    That’s the possibility that horrifies me. The stuff of nightmares.

  49. 49
    Punchy says:

    @Mustang Bobby: She did have nice front junk.

  50. 50
    HeartlandLiberal says:

    What puzzles me is no one in the pundit class is willing to point out that a candidate with less than 5% standing in the polls is really just a statistical non-entity, since the margin of error for most polls is usually 3 – 5%. The fact that Jeb! polls anything is, as far as I can tell, just static and white noise on the polling landscape. I would say he was full of sound and fury, signifying nothing, but that would just be so, so far from the truth it would not work for Jeb!. who impresses one more in the diametrically opposite direction from dynamic. I frankly cannot recall a presidential candidate with his charisma level, namely that of a limp wet dishcloth that really needs to be thrown in the wash.

  51. 51
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Frankensteinbeck: Ted Cruz is coming on strong. The one candidate who disturbs me as much as Trump.

  52. 52
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @Amir Khalid: People will put up with a lot of shit (cough Steve Jobs) if they’re making money/successful. Trump isn’t; he fucks people. He doesn’t give a shit. Now who’s gonna want to work with him? Lately it was TV networks because their lawyers are bigger sharks than Trump and his lawyers. No, fuck you.

  53. 53

    @Punchy: Well, okay, if you like that sort of thing. But she was the prototype for Michele Bachmann. Fortunately her career in Congress was significant by being completely insignificant.

  54. 54
    Keith G says:

    @Matt McIrvin: To me, Cruz is the most interesting character of the GOP lot. Now, that’s not saying much and what I find interesting when I do check into campaign news are not favorable personality traits.

  55. 55
    azelie says:

    Trying to tear down everyone but the person you think you think you have the best chance running against? That sounds like David Vitter’s recent gubernatorial campaign and it didn’t go well for him.

  56. 56
    MomSense says:


    My kids are losing classmates to heroine. It’s tragic.

  57. 57
    Germy says:

    Undercover Greenpeace activists buy off corrupt academics in a climate science sting

    The environmental activism group Greenpeace today disclosed that it led an undercover investigation to expose how easy it is for big oil, gas, or coal companies to pay academics at leading U.S. universities to write research that sheds doubt on climate science, and promotes the commercial interests of the fossil fuel industry.

  58. 58
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Keith G: The thing about Cruz is, he’s probably smarter than Trump, but his appeal to Republicans is of a traditional type whose ability to swing the whole country is declining, Whereas Trumpism–a “conservatism” that deemphasizes the appeals to traditional culture or deregulation, and instead hits hard on raw racism and hatred of foreigners–seems like it might be the future, not just here but all over the world.

  59. 59
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @azelie: Claire McKaskill pulled that off. You have to be good at the game, though. Apparently Vitter wasn’t expecting a rival who would sock him right on the chin. Repeatedly.

  60. 60
    Cermet says:

    Chump is a troll and really what the base in the GOP loves. Will the latest “He’s a Dem plant” work by JEB(?) ? Maybe it will since few things get that base more upset than anything that might be related to liberals. No matter, the ride is fun and when that clown crashes (or doesn’t) new clowns will continue.

  61. 61
    Baud says:

    @Matt McIrvin: And Trump is more likeable than Cruz. It feels icky to say, but then fascism relies on charismatic leaders.

  62. 62
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @Matt McIrvin: Trumpism is the politics of “I’m worse off today than yesterday, and expect to be even worse off tomorrow.” Which is why it kills in austerity states. Most of US population lives in cities where efforts like Fight for Fifteen are underway. The Dem race is a totally different story, one of faith in bending the curve back towards the little people: students, workers, people on the margins with chronic health conditions, anybody who’s been fucked by 30 years of trickle down the oligarch’s leg.

    There are absolutely NOT more of them than there are of us but we do have to really work at turnout, and that’s what keeps Democrats up at night.

  63. 63
    Germy says:


    And Trump is more likeable than Cruz. It feels icky to say, but then fascism relies on charismatic leaders.

    Trump has that Joan Rivers “Can we talk?” vibe. When he gives a speech, it doesn’t feel like a speech. It just feels like he’s up there to get some stuff off his chest. And his crowds love it.

    Watched Major Garrett on CBS This Morning. He did a report on the GOP candidates’ repudiation of Trump. At the end, Garrett said (with more than a hint of alarm) “Analysts say that if Trump wins the nomination, Hillary Clinton will win the election easily.” And then he made a sour face.

  64. 64
    Baud says:

    @Another Holocene Human: Since we don’t have the like button yet, please accept this comment in lieu of said like.

  65. 65
    MomSense says:

    @Matt McIrvin:
    Cruz is definitely smarter but there is something creepy about him that he can’t shake. Remember that photo of him holding a bacon wrapped rifle? He just looked really strange like he was playing dress up.

  66. 66
    Kay says:


    They just got an manslaughter conviction against a dealer here for a heroin death- a jury trial. I hadn’t seen that tried before. Two women, both in their thirties, one sold the other the drug, accidental overdose, seller convicted of involuntary manslaughter.

  67. 67
    Baud says:


    And then he made a sour face.

    More professional than uncontrolled sobbing, which I’m sure is what he was feeling on the inside.

  68. 68
    Joel says:

    @Germy: It’s not that these douchebags are corrupt, it’s that they sell out for so little.

  69. 69
    JPL says:

    @Germy: In fairness, Major Garrett always has a sour face.

  70. 70
    Germy says:

    @JPL: The look Major Garrett gave after reporting a Trump nomination would win Hillary the election was “And we can’t have that.”

  71. 71
    Baud says:

    Angela Merkel is Time’s person of the year.

  72. 72
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @Baud: Any reason why?

  73. 73
    Baud says:

    @BillinGlendaleCA: I just caught a snippet on the news. Apparently it’s because she has had to deal with a bunch of shit this year.

  74. 74
    OldDave says:


    It was Time. ::runs:: ::hides::

  75. 75
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Germy: I’ve been watching the Huffington Post aggregation of “X vs. Clinton” head-to-head polls for a long time.

    Unfortunately it’s hard to say what they indicate, because these polls are a bit scarce on the ground at the moment, especially for candidates like Trump or Ben Carson who were not considered major players at the beginning of the campaign. A single, possibly garbage poll can swing all the averages. Every so often, someone (often Fox News) puts out a poll that shows most or all of the Republicans walloping Hillary Clinton by gigantic margins, and it turns all the graphs in alarming directions.

    This somewhat mysterious “Morning Consult” operation just released a poll showing Trump beating Clinton 45-40 nationwide, and that all by itself caused HuffPo’s model to show Trump ahead of Clinton by one point. But other polls taken over the same time period don’t show that.

    Anyway, one might be able to use them at least to do candidate-by-candidate comparisons, if not to call the race. It looks to me as if Trump is still more electable than Ted Cruz, but Rubio and Carson actually do the best (even the most reputable polls often show them beating Clinton at this point; the averages are pretty much tied).

  76. 76
    debbie says:


    The worst was the Bar/Bat Mitzvah period.

  77. 77
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @Baud: Well, if that’s the criteria; O-man should have received it the last 7 years.

  78. 78
    Betty Cracker says:

    @debbie: Worse than the baby shower period? If so, it must have been pretty damn bad.

  79. 79
    Gin & Tonic says:

    Sitting at home this morning waiting for the oil service guys to show up, as I am having my fuel oil storage tank replaced. Those who read this blog obsessively regularly may recall that about a month and a half ago I had a leak in one component of that system, making a huge mess that I am still recovering from.

    Note to other homeowners who use fuel oil for heat: it is easier and better to replace these things before you need to. The rated useful life of a single-wall tank is about 35 years.

  80. 80
    Baud says:

    @BillinGlendaleCA: Has he won it in any year? Surely 2008?

  81. 81
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @BillinGlendaleCA: Because they were probably icked out at the thought of giving it to Trump or al-Baghdadi.

  82. 82
    debbie says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    Definitely worse. Okay if you’re a kid and it’s your friend being mitzvahed, but to be an older friend/relative and basically have to spend several hours watching a bunch of teens at more or less a school dance is less amusing.

  83. 83
    MomSense says:


    Wow. We have had a number of convictions for possession and selling here but not manslaughter. Now if we could go after the pharmaceutical companies for what their part in this catastrophe.

  84. 84
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @Baud: 2008 and 20012. I guess it’s good to be a winner. Baud!, Time’s Person of the Year 2016.

  85. 85
    David Koch says:

    @Baud: What!? Not ¿Jeb ? What a ripoff.

    Stoopid Time. The person of the should have been Gay Marriage. Seriously, in the long term, there was no bigger development.

  86. 86
    Baud says:


    I might have to buy a copy if that happens.

  87. 87
    debbie says:

    @Matt McIrvin:

    It looks to me as if Trump is still more electable than Ted Cruz

    I’m not so sure of that. Trump’s increasing outrageousness will make Cruz more palatable to conservatives. I still think he’s more dangerous then Trump. Trump’s a blowhard, but Cruz is a zealot. His proclamation that under his presidency, the country will return to the Christian nation it was destined to be is very frightening.

  88. 88
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    I think I’ve decided to root my new phone, the Sammy volume nag is already annoying me after only one day.

  89. 89
    MomSense says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    Oh god. I went to one where the mom got a dozen copies of that horrible book I’ll Love You Forever [and stalk you in a troublesome and unhealthy way]. I was the only one there who wasn’t gushing and practically crying about that book.

  90. 90
    Betty Cracker says:

    @debbie: That does sound horrid. Hopefully cocktails are served!

  91. 91
    debbie says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    Yes, cocktails and good food. Yiddish bribery.

  92. 92
    MattF says:

    @debbie: It also depends on who you get to sit with. My sister seated me with the ‘miscellaneous unclassifiable’. It was not fun.

    ETA: Although, perhaps, accurate.

  93. 93
    p.a. says:

    I have a question about the anti anti-GMO campaigns. Am I missing something? The ‘anti-antis’ seem to be claiming the ‘label GMO products’ people are whackos who think GMO products will kill them. Straw man? The anti-GMO arguments I’m familiar with claim the issue is production and its environmental effects; farmed and GMO salmon affecting wild stocks and genetic diversity, Roundup resistant crops leading to the evo of superweeds, insect resistant plants damaging non-target beneficial insects, birds etc, and experimental crops with unproven benefits escaping and crossing with wild counterparts. The labeling issue to me is just a way to exert market pressure by being able to avoid those products.

    And that’s not even taking into account the already proven examples of bad economic actions by Monsanto etc.

  94. 94
    Emily68 says:


    How does the 5th place guy eventually win? Several Olympics ago, I was watching the Short Track Ice Skating race. The guy who won was the 5th and slowest qualifier for the finals. He said afterwards his strategy was to hang back and hope all the other guys wiped out. If so, he’d been far enough back not to get wiped out, but close enough to skate past them all and WIN. It was his only chance because he was by far the slowest guy in the race. And sure enough, in the last lap, one guy fell and took out three other guys and the 5th place qualifier won!!!!

    So maybe Jeb was watching that race, too.

  95. 95
    Baud says:


    seated me with the ‘miscellaneous unclassifiable’.

    So they knew you were a regular Balloon Juice commenter?

  96. 96
    debbie says:

    This is what makes Cruz so dangerous:

  97. 97
    MattF says:

    @Baud: It was pre-BJ, but I clearly had potential.

  98. 98
    Baud says:

    @debbie: They’re all dangerous in their own special way.

    Cruz is interesting because it would represent a major comeback of the religious right, which has been relatively quiet on the national level lately, while libertarian rhetoric had been on more of an upswing on the right.

  99. 99
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @debbie: They all lie Debbie, they’re politicians (including Dems). I really don’t worry much about Cruz, at least not at this point. Everybody hates him. That probably includes his wife.

  100. 100
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @Baud: The religious right has really felt like they’ve been played the last 35 years

  101. 101
    Baud says:


    On one hand, they kind of have been played. On the other hand, they deserve to be.

    They may yet succeed in the abortion arena, however.

  102. 102
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    Daniel Larrison at The American Conservative: Why Cruz Won’t Be the Republican Nominee

    As an ideologue, Cruz isn’t worried about the consequences of what he does, and as a demagogue he has no scruples about vilifying and attacking others, including those theoretically on the same side of a debate, when they deviate even a little from his preferred position. That gives him a committed following from a fraction of “very conservative” voters around the country while making everyone else resent and loathe him. Someone like this can’t unite a coalition behind him, and he certainly isn’t going to win a general election. It’s why he is very unlikely to become the party’s nominee, and it’s also why the GOP should be glad that he won’t be.

  103. 103
    debbie says:


    Everybody hates him. That probably includes his wife.

    Thank you. After listening to two separate Cruz interviews on NPR this morning, your comment cheered me immensely.

  104. 104
    Betty Cracker says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: It would be possible to write an equally convincing case on why each one of the GOP candidates can’t win the nomination. And yet one of them will.

  105. 105
    MattF says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: Also, like many politicians, Cruz probably has Daddy Problems. Given the weirdness of Cruz’s daddy, I don’t think we want to go there.

  106. 106
    PaulW says:

    Jeb? can’t quit because pride is on the line. Familial pride, personal pride.

    Jeb? is looking at the facts he has a deep enough campaign pool to draw from – and may get some funders back when the lesser souls like Kasich drop out – and the possibility of getting to the July 2016 convention with enough delegates to rig the rules against Trump or Rubio or Cruz (whomever gets there with the most delegates). A brokered convention favors the establishment regardless of how angry the base gets about it, and Bushes own the establishment.

    The only reason Jeb? will drop out is if he gets past the first three rounds of primaries (not caucuses) without a single delegate. By then it will be clearly too late and the establishment will burn the Bush regime in favor of whomever they can trust to stop Trump (and likely Cruz, because he’s not well-liked either).

  107. 107
    Betty Cracker says:

    @PaulW: That sounds about right to me. He’s got the money to hang in there. It’s not like he has a job to go back to, and he’s seen his family sleaze people into all kinds of unlikely positions of power, including his own dumb brother as POTUS. In his “lived experience,” anything is possible.

  108. 108
    Feebog says:

    @Betty Cracker: anything is possible, but I just don’t see Jeb? Pulling it off. Burning through 75 million to take out Cruz, Rubio, and perhaps Christie (Carson is already toast), reeks of desperation. Moreover, it’s a stupid idea. As is a a 15 minute documentary. They may as well film a week old loaf of wonderbread slowly molding away.

  109. 109
    JimV says:

    I venture into the new, unfamiliar comment system to say: great metaphor! (At the start of the OP.) You should think about writing a book. (I’ll go check on Amazon to see if you have already.)

  110. 110
    Steve in the ATL says:


    Jeb:( is a loser

    According to my internet experience, the correct spelling is “looser”

  111. 111
    01jack says:

    @p.a.: But still, asking for labeling in order to make possible a boycott campaign is a little weak, is it not?

  112. 112
    Elie says:

    No one, including Jeb is quitting before the primaries and I predict, the primaries will be full of surprises. All these “national polls” are not structured like the primaries are set up and the ground game is everything. Trust me from someone who has had a real sense of what that is in winning and losing campaigns, it is a skill and strength in its own right and looking at the money spent does not necessarily give you an accurate measure of who has and who has not got one. It is not having a stadium packed with people for speeches. Its how much your candidate can get the right people to organize and sustain the weary doorbelling, calling and keeping tabs on the data of who has and has not been contacted. I always worry, of course, but I don’t think we will get a real measure of who is really on top and who is strong or weak until after these start…

  113. 113
    p.a. says:

    @01jack: Not a boycott campaign, just transparency and individual choice. And the fact that even simple labelling is being treated as a whack-o’s issue shows nothing more can be achieved currently.

  114. 114
    JustRuss says:

    @Feebog: I don’t know, I think kneecapping everyone else is Jeb’s best shot. Trump is made of teflon as far as his supporters are concerned, but they’re a minority of Republicans, and the rest really want a serious not-Trump to turn to. Jeb’s dull as dirt but he has enough positives to make him competitive with the rest of the field (yes, that’s a low bar to clear).

    As for the 15-minute Life of Jeb! film, yeah, bad idea. The less people know about Jeb the better.

  115. 115
    Anoniminous says:

    @Matt McIrvin:

    I suspect Morning Consult is a polling Troll.

  116. 116
    GHayduke (formerly lojasmo) says:

    Day two of staged bath remodel. Tearing out the lath and plaster around the tub. Almost done with demolition, thank her noodly appendages. What a fucking mess.

    Edit: to, too, two

  117. 117
  118. 118
    Matt McIrvin says:

    @Anoniminous: Their polls have been all over the place; they aren’t quite as obviously terrible as, say, Gravis Marketing/One America, but I also find them suspicious.

Comments are closed.