Let’s Not Forget the Most Important Thing

Andrew Cuomo is safe: safe as houses, blue-chip stocks, or a bet on a warm day in July. In much the same way as swallows return to Capistrano, or searchers return to Google, Mario’s Kid bucked the tide last night and returned to his seat as governor. He did so by running the least inspiring, most self-centered campaign in modern memory. After greasing up the Working Families Party with a set of well-polished lies, New York’s foremost navel-gazer and non-contender for the Presidency spent a jillion dollars in advertising while sitting at home gagging on whatever canned delight Sandra Lee put on the table. By which I mean, he did fuck-all for the down ticket, though the Times puts it more gently:

But after winning his primary in September, Mr. Cuomo proved to be a less-than-energetic campaigner for Senate Democrats, sparing in his endorsements and rarely stumping for embattled incumbents or hopefuls. And on Tuesday, it seemed likely that the liberal wing of the Democratic Party would lay heavy blame at the feet of the governor, who was easily re-elected to a second term.

Yes, Andrew is safe, and the New York State Senate is safely in Republican hands, and all is well in the money party. Gazing in my crystal ball, I see a wedding to Ms. Lee, a less-than-energetic Presidential run, a Cabinet seat in the Clinton Administration and, finally, retirement after a few years as a board member at Goldman-Sachs. Unless Andrew chokes on a Corn Nut in one of Sandra’s Kwanzaa Cakes, he will live a long, safe life untroubled by the messy business of campaigning for anyone but himself. He is the kind of Democrat that brings us election nights like last night, and there are far too many of his kind in the party.

18 replies
  1. 1
    Baud says:

    I don’t like Cuomo either, but I guess I’m not in the mood today to criticize Democrats who have won their races.

    Better Democrats need to find a way to win primaries and elections. And I have no advice on that score right now.

  2. 2
    Botsplainer says:

    Dude, RainbowBright Sparklepony was never going to win. Her hippie parents decided that when they hung her moniker on her at birth.

  3. 3
    Walker says:

    Ithaca – Ithaca! – has not had an opponent to its Republican state senator in four election cycles. Hard to bitch about Republican control if no one will run.

  4. 4
    Catherine D. says:

    Yeah, I’ve never gotten that. Not that I could run for it, since I am temperamentally unsuited for suffering fools …

  5. 5
    Cervantes says:

    Great song, but things change.

    From Paloma Esquivel (Los Angeles Times, March 25, 2009):

    There was a time, people say, when the swallows swarmed San Juan Capistrano in the days just before winter gave way to spring. Every year, locals say, the white-bellied birds filled the sky like a rain cloud. They returned to their nests in the old adobe mission as church bells rang, heralding their arrival. But the mission bells rang again and again during this year’s Festival of the Swallows, which ended Sunday, and the tiny birds just didn’t make an appearance. Truth is, they’ve hardly been seen at the mission for years.

    Not sure it portends anything for Cuomo, though.

  6. 6
    Cervantes says:

    @Catherine D.:

    Not quite a People’s Republic, then?

  7. 7
    Catherine D. says:

    Well, it could be a safety issue – the senate district is chock full of Repeal the SAFE Act signs. An actual Democrat could be seriously injured campaigning :)

  8. 8
    Sherparick says:

    Reading the N.Y. Times articles on Cuomo these last six months indicate that he really does believe he could run for President and be elected. He is very much a Wall Street Democrat, defining liberalism in purely social terms connected to Reproductive Rights and LBGT rights (police state created by the drug and terrorism wars he is fine with) and almost as much a flat taxer as any Republican on economic issues. All social problems and inequalities will be solved by “school reform” and the private sector paying teachers’s minimum wages when they can find unpaid interns to do the job for “experience” and “networking.”

    This is a very troubling election. About 60% of the white vote getting locked in Republican and the South is now as one party state as it was under the Dixiecrats. A sharp recession under a Democratic President and we get Tea Party President (Ted Cruz), to go with a Tea Party Congress, and I expect we will be permanently in a oligarchic republic/state at that point.

  9. 9
    Cervantes says:

    @Catherine D.:

    This could help.

  10. 10
    hilts says:

    Cuomo is also Safe as Milk

    h/t Captain Beefheart and his Magic Band

  11. 11
    mai naem mobile says:

    Fuck Cuomo. Seriously fuck him.

  12. 12
    The Moar You Know says:

    By which I mean, he did fuck-all for the down ticket

    Please expand this to “the Democratic Party did fuck-all for the down ticket”. The national and state GOP poured money into our local races. Not the Dems. We got fucking slaughtered here. San Diego County went from purple to hard red last night. The damage is going to take years to undo, and that’s assuming it doesn’t get any worse next cycle. And that’s a bet I’m no longer willing to make.

  13. 13
    JGabriel says:

    mistermix @ top:

    Gazing in my crystal ball, I see a wedding to Ms. Lee, a less-than-energetic Presidential run, a Cabinet seat in the Clinton Administration …

    I don’t know about a cabinet seat in the Clinton Administration. I could be wrong, but I get the feeling than Andy and Hillary aren’t actually the bestest of buds.

  14. 14
    wenchacha says:

    I wrote in for Teachout, anyway.

  15. 15
    Ruckus says:

    He is the kind of Democrat that brings us election nights like last night, and there are far too many of his kind in the party.

    Just had the same basic thought before I checked in. All national politicians are in it for themselves with very few exceptions. And even fewer of those are altruistic to a level that would be easily recognizable.

  16. 16
    Epicurus says:

    @wenchacha: Me too! While it may have been a “wasted vote,” there was no way in hell I was going to color in the bubble for this crook. Disbanding the Moreland Commission because they were too close to finding some of the skeletons in his closet was the last straw for me. I hope he enjoys the next four years, because his political life is OVER after that. President? Hahahahahaha…Ted Cruz will get elected to that office before Cuoma and that ain’t NEVER gonna happen! (He wrote, whistling past the graveyard.)

  17. 17
    Milk Maid in Chief says:

    Cuomo’s behavior reminds me a good deal of our former CA governor, Gray Davis. He had an appetite for eating his own, was cold molasses slow with his political appointments, and wouldn’t lift a finger for a fellow Democrat. When shit hit the fan, no one had his back, because: fuck him.

    You may not like the personalities of the politicians that get to the national level, but my god, what we expect our national politicians to be willing to put themselves through requires the hide of a tank and an ego large enough to think you are worth all that money you have to ask for, not to mention, you have to enjoy talking yourself up to large crowds for months on end. That is not for the bashful or the shy. I’ve seen multiple really good, really thoughtful local politicians get no support from the electorate when they run for state office, and then they drop out of the political world. It’s frustrating as hell. Get involved in your local races people- that is where eventual state and national politicians come from!

  18. 18
    Full metal Wingnut says:

    @Sherparick: I’m unimpressed with Cuomo, but comparing both him and Clinton on the merits, there isn’t really anything to differentiate them.

    Only thing I can think of-Clinton seems much less weaselly and slimy. And I don’t think Clinton would stab her own party in the back, which Cuomo has shown he’s willing to do. It’s a marginal difference, but politics is all about the margins I guess.

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