Another Fourth of July Jesus Story

This one is from Bozeman, Montana:

Just five years ago, however, Bozeman woke up to controversy when the newly formed local Tea Party decided it wanted to march down Main Street on the Fourth to protest taxes and government spending. But rather than follow the normal process for a parade permit, the Tea Party stormed a Bozeman City Commission meeting and demanded a parade permit for July 4. The commissioners were so intimidated that they ignored both the usual application process and Montana’s Open Meeting Law. On the spot, the Tea Party was granted a parade permit.

The town then learned that the Tea Party’s plan to close down Main Street for its tax protest was going to cost city taxpayers $1,100 in staff and police overtime. The irony turned out to be too much to pass up, so I applied for a second parade permit for Independence Day. And because city regulations only allowed an organization to apply for a parade permit, I made the application (with tongue firmly in cheek) on behalf of a new, contrastingly “big tent” organization: The Green Coalition of Gay Loggers for Jesus.

The whole thing is a fun read. Open thread.






88 replies
  1. 1
    Botsplainer says:

    Love it.

  2. 2
    c u n d gulag says:

    ROTFLMAO!
    TOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. 3
    askew says:

    That’s awesome.

    Since this is an open thread, anyone have suggestions for dealing with jackass neighbors? The townhouse next to me has been sublet by a couple of guys in their 20s who are complete tools. They play their music so loud it shakes the pictures on my walls, park in my driveway, block my driveway and hangout on their back patio which is basically right below my bedroom until 4-5 in the morning talking loudly and hacking up loogies. Last night, they took the party outside at 4:30 am and I’ve been up since. I’ve asked them repeatedly to turn down the music so my walls stop shaking and to stop blocking and parking in my driveway. It works for a couple of days and they are right back at it again. I can deal with all of it except the patio parties in the middle of the night.

    Is their a mosquito anti-loitering devise that only works on assholes?

  4. 4
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    Some years back, some friends of mine were banned from the St Louis St Patrick’s Day parade through downtown STL. Apparently, the powers that be were not at all amused by a bunch of hairy, somewhat overweight, middle aged, men dressed as Girl Scouts. So they organized an alternative St Paddy’s day parade in the Soulard neighborhood. We had an awful lot of fun with it for a couple years. LOTS of degenerates in STL.

  5. 5
    I'mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet says:

    @askew: Bummer. Maybe you could try one of these gizmos. :-/

    Is there management you can complain to? At some point, you can call the cops on them, too. There must be noise ordinances they’re violating.

    No good solution, unfortunately. I hope you find some quiet soon.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  6. 6
    big ole hound says:

    @askew: Since your balcony is right above theirs, I think you should water the plants including those below you.

  7. 7
    askew says:

    @I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet:

    Thanks. I can reach out to management but it is out of state and I doubt they’ll do much of anything besides send a letter. Since the people don’t respond to me, I doubt they’ll care about a letter. They are just too young to be living in this development. It’s a bunch of seniors and young people with families. Except for these douchebags who are the only ones really making noise at 4 in the morning outside. I am just lucky enough to live next door to them.

  8. 8
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @askew: Water hoses. On the parties, inside the house too. In the vehicles too. Especially in winter. On the more serious side, if being an even bigger dick than they are is not your style, call the landlord. The sublet could well be illegal between his renter and these yahoos.

  9. 9
    Elizabelle says:

    @askew:

    Well, they’ve got to sleep sometime. Invite the seniors and some kids with drums to a patio party at 9:00 am a few times after the jerks have been up all night loogying.

    Let your other neighbors know why you’re doing it.

    Serve coffee to the adults and sugar, sugar, sugar to the kids. Barky dogs welcome too.

  10. 10
    debbie says:

    @askew:

    Your town/city must have some kind of noise ordinance that’s being violated. I’d also check with your other neighbors and see if they’re as bothered by the noise as you are.

  11. 11
    askew says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    I am hoping the sublet is illegal so I’ll check on that. The place was bought as an investment right before the market tanked and it has been a never-ending stream of sublets but everyone else has been quiet and friendly. Then, these yahoos show-up and we are on the 2nd year of this behavior. I can’t take much more.

    @Elizabelle – that is a good idea if I was more of an extrovert. But, it took all the nerve I’ve had to ask them to be quiet the # of times that I have.

    @debbie – I’ll have to look into the noise ordinance and work up the nerve to talk to the other neighbors about it.

  12. 12
    Elizabelle says:

    @askew:

    A quieter option for revenge fantasy: get a record that drives one crazy,and play it over and over and over, loudly, during their rest and restoration hours.

    One year at college, there was a student on other side of dorm wall who played “The Monster Mash” over and over, late at night. It wasn’t that loud, but was strange.

    Never saw the girl. She left school a few weeks in.

  13. 13
    debbie says:

    @askew:

    I’ve been through this kind of situation in the past in NYC as well as in smaller towns (jerks are everywhere), so I know how aggravation and frustration can build up. You might want to try leaving notes in their mailboxes and let them come to you should your nerve fail you.

  14. 14
    askew says:

    All excellent ideas. I’ve thought about making a ton of noise on my side early in the morning to annoy them, but honestly I don’t think I could take the noise on my side. They must have the stereo up to 11 in order to shake all my pictures on my side of the wall. It sounds like a 1990s techno club in my townhouse and I hate techno music.

    I think I’ll start with the HOA and see if they are in violation of the sublet rules and see if there are rules for noise. I’d guess there has to be since I got fined $25 for not taking my garbage cans in quick enough and not replacing my light in the back of my house when it burnt out.

    It makes me feel better to know that I am not being unreasonable. I try to follow a live and let live approach but they’ve pushed me too far.

  15. 15
    Baud says:

    @askew:

    Welcome to libertarian paradise!

    Is their a mosquito anti-loitering devise that only works on assholes?

    I have read of a device that emits a high pitched sound that only young people can hear. It’s used to deter loitering. If these guys are in their 20s, they may already be too old for it to work. I’m not sure where the age cutoff is for this thing.

  16. 16
    PurpleGirl says:

    Askew — you are not being unreasonable. You have the right to enjoy your residence in peace and quiet. That’s how it’s phrased in NYC law.

    The two main things to look into are the regulations regarding sublets and city/town noise ordinances. The noise regulations won’t probably involve the landlord, just the local police. (Maybe it’s SWAT team that’ll get sent.)

  17. 17
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    @askew:

    I think I’ll start with the HOA and see if they are in violation of the sublet rules and see if there are rules for noise.

    Now yer talkin’. A HOA often has more power than the municipality. And as small-scale administrators* they’re often eager to throw the book at people.

    *tyrants

  18. 18
    raven says:

    @askew: Call the cops, screw all the rest of that bullshit.

  19. 19
    satby says:

    @Baud: If they’re in their 20s and been playing loud music for years, as is probable, they’ve surely already lost hearing ability in those higher registers.

    edited for typo

  20. 20
    I'mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet says:

    @Elizabelle: My wife J has a similar story about a guy who lived next door and would play Gilbert O’ Sullivan’s Claire at high volume all night… :-/

    People are weird…

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  21. 21
    satby says:

    OT bleg of a sorts: When will we do another crafter / artisan thread? I finally went live with my own Etsy shop for my soapmaking, and I’m dying to share :)

  22. 22
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @askew:

    They must have the stereo up to 11 in order to shake all my pictures on my side of the wall. It sounds like a 1990s techno club in my townhouse and I hate techno music.

    This gives me another idea: Do the same thing with country music, somebody like Dwight Yoakam oughta work, on continuous play, when you leave.

  23. 23
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    I had a downstairs duplex tenant who would pass out at night with Crystal Gale’s song Angel in the Morning playing on repeat. She drove a truck at a gravel pit and was too deaf to be awakened by banging on the door.

  24. 24
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @satby:

    I finally went live with my own Etsy shop for my soapmaking, and I’m dying to share :)

    You just did! I clicked on your nym and it took me right to the Etsy page.

    The soaps are beautiful, like jewels. That must be a fun craft.

  25. 25
    rachel says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: Or Sousa marches.

  26. 26
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @raven: Heh. I spent too many years in the city. It would never work there. They’d just tell you to move.

  27. 27
    Morzer says:

    @askew:

    Since this is an open thread, anyone have suggestions for dealing with jackass neighbors?

    Second Amendment remedies?

    Seriously, I’d call the police. I had to do that some years ago when the jerk who lived upstairs from me took to playing music loudly all night. To my evil delight, he got into a fight with the police when they came to remonstrate with him.

    You might find that the local ordinances only cover excessive noise during anti-social hours, but it’s worth trying, if only to get some peace and quiet at night.

  28. 28
    Lolis says:

    @askew:

    If they parked in my driveway, I would look into getting their car towed, same if they were blocking my driveway. Towing is an expensive lesson and they would never do that again. I would call the cops anytime they were loud. You can find out what the quiet hours for your neighbood are from the police. It is probably 10 pm on weekdays and 11 or midnight on weekends. Police will enforce noise after those hours.

  29. 29
    Botsplainer says:

    @askew:

    Can you mow the grass or work on your car at 7 am?

  30. 30
    WereBear says:

    Annoying them back will just be escalating. I would get the cops involved without another word… and write the landlord. Say the whole bunch of you would hate to look for other housing… see how many will sign it.

  31. 31
    SuperHrefna says:

    @askew: having been there myself all I can do is offer you my deepest condolences. Neighbors like that are the chief reason why I am happy to live in the deepest darkest piece of nowhere Long Island has to offer after years of big city life. Just thinking about it now makes my stomach clench. Stay strong, and look into moving.

  32. 32
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @rachel: Yeeaahhhh…..

  33. 33
    SFAW says:

    It might also help if you have a large friend or three explain to those assholes the error of their ways. Repeatedly.

    Of course, if said assholes are also nose-tackle size, it might not be as effective.

    Sugar in their gas tanks might sweeten their disposition, also.

  34. 34
    askew says:

    @Botsplainer:

    @askew:

    Can you mow the grass or work on your car at 7 am?

    We have landscapers through our HOA and they take care of waking everyone up with their early mowing.

    I am hoping HOA will be their usual annoying selves after I complain and fine the little bastards. Money should take care of the issue. I’m always in too big of a hurry to wait for a tow truck when they block my driveway.

  35. 35
    rikyrah says:

    That was a funny story and a nice way to begin the day.

  36. 36
    rikyrah says:

    @askew:
    Is there a reason why you have not called the police on them?

  37. 37
    SFAW says:

    And I would expect said assholes might respond poorly to being told they can’t behave like overstimulated three-year-olds any more. So you might want to try to rig up – or have someone do it for you – some kind of monitoring/surveillance system. (Easier said than done, I realize.) Then, if they respond as immature assholes often do, their offense moves from annoyance to outright vandalism, the consequences for which are sometimes a little greater.

  38. 38
    askew says:

    @SuperHrefna:

    @askew: having been there myself all I can do is offer you my deepest condolences. Neighbors like that are the chief reason why I am happy to live in the deepest darkest piece of nowhere Long Island has to offer after years of big city life. Just thinking about it now makes my stomach clench. Stay strong, and look into moving.

    I own my townhome and a still a bit underwater so I am stuck here for another couple of years. And I moved out here to the outer burbs to avoid assholes like my neighbors and had been successful until these jackasses showed up.

  39. 39
    askew says:

    @rikyrah:

    The police just seem like the last resort. Plus, I am worried the police will show up after the neighbors go back inside. I’ll call them during the day and see what I should do next time they are that loud.

  40. 40
    MattF says:

    I have to admit that this wingericious LGF item:

    http://littlegreenfootballs.co....._President

    reminded me of the famous OJ tabloid headline “Nicole Lookalike Tells All.”

  41. 41
    coin operated says:

    I@askew: start with the HOA. As mentioned above, they’re petty tyrants but they’re effective.

    Other than that, call the cops and keep calling. If you were nice once and asked in person, let the cops be the assholes in the future. Cops really dislike being called to the same residence repeatedly…

    Finally, it’s illegal to block another’s driveway in many cities. I’d look into getting the car ticketed or towed.

  42. 42
    askew says:

    I just want to say this thread is one of the reasons I love this site so much. Posters who are willing to chime in with advise and don’t belittle your dumb problems. Thanks for the suggestions everyone.

  43. 43
    Keith P says:

    @coin operated: I’ve had an issue with another neighbor before (someone kept moving my lawn clippings to the middle of my driveway), and the HOA told me they don’t get involved in intra-neighbor disputes. They said to call the constable (which I did and who was perfectly fine with talking to said neighbor).

  44. 44
    Baud says:

    @Botsplainer:

    Can you mow the grass or work on your car at 7 am?

    Even better, do it naked, a la Cole.

  45. 45
    Baud says:

    @askew:

    don’t belittle your dumb problems

    It’s early. I don’t like to belittle until I’ve had my coffee.

  46. 46
    MattF says:

    @askew: FWIW, calling the police is a good idea. Several years ago some construction work began near my condo early on a Sunday morning and the cops were very effective in enforcing the noise ordinance. Also, just between you and me, your yahoo neighbors are probably indulging in some not-very-legal activities, and would not be pleased at seeing cops at their front door.

  47. 47
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    This darling parrot is making me crazy. As long as he can see me he’s happy. But when I disappear around the corner to sit at my desk/write/listen to music, he’s all “COME HERE!” “HELLO?” “BOOP!” “COME HERE!!” “BOOP” “GOOD BOY!” punctuated by various chirps and whistles.

    I may end up relocating my desk to have line-of-sight contact with the Bird Palace so I can type in relative peace.
    We adore him but he’s accustomed to living with an elderly shut-in and expects constant company.

  48. 48
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Elizabelle: yep. If they’re up drinking at 5:00 am, they aren’t going to be happy with a weed whacker at 11:30.

  49. 49
    askew says:

    @MattF:

    Yeah, I am guessing some pot smoking is occurring.

  50. 50
    Morzer says:

    @Baud:

    How you gonna keep ’em down on the farm, once they seen Karl Hungus?

  51. 51
    Stella B. says:

    Somebody parked across my driveway once. I called the cops and they arrived with tow-truck lickety-split. This is definitely a call the cops situation. I would be on the phone at midnight, every night, until the problem stops. Unless the HOA or these clowns’ mommies will back you up, the police are the right tool for the problem.

  52. 52
    Amir Khalid says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:
    I read in Irene Pepperberg’s Alex and Me that parrots are very social animals in the wild; they need constant company, and tend to act out like human four-year-olds if deprived of it.

  53. 53
    Fred says:

    @askew: That device is the local cops. Nobody likes to be an angry old guy but 4:30 am is off the charts bending rude to disturbing the peace illegal.

  54. 54
    tybee says:

    @askew:

    I’m always in too big of a hurry to wait for a tow truck when they block my driveway.

    you need to take the time to have the car towed.

    having to go get one’s car back from the tow company makes an impression on the miscreant.

    in most areas, once the car is hooked up to the truck, they owe the fee even if they rush out to plead their case. tow truck operators don’t back down.

    take the time to fix the problem.

  55. 55
    Cassidy says:

    @askew: Calling the cops creates a paper trail. It’s a lot easier tongi to the HOA with several police reports.

  56. 56
    Amir Khalid says:

    @askew:
    There was a movie out earlier this year on this very subject. Perhaps it might offer some useful ideas.

  57. 57
    Eric S. says:

    @askew: have you looked into the community’s bylaws? There might be recourse in there. If the owners of the unit stay taking fines because of their sublets some action could be taken.

    I jumped to the end of the thread so sorry if this is a repeat suggestion.

  58. 58
    WaterGirl says:

    @Baud: Scott’s link to that device is at comment #5.

  59. 59
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    @Amir Khalid:

    I read in Irene Pepperberg’s Alex and Me that parrots are very social animals in the wild; they need constant company, and tend to act out like human four-year-olds if deprived of it.

    Seems to be true of this one. He’s the same species as Alex, Congo African Grey. He’s a great little companion and a real trickster but he really wants someone in the room with him or at least in sight at all times. Right now he’s raising a ruckus because he can hear me around the corner and I’m not paying attention to him.
    It makes phone calls interesting for the person on the other end.

  60. 60
    WaterGirl says:

    @askew: Small consolation for you, but you are making me feel less bad about my annoying neighbor. They and their 4 teenage kids park all 4 of their cars in front of my house, and they NEVER park in front of theirs. I also call them the Loud People. I have always gotten along with my neighbors in the past, but I have been feeling very frustrated.

    My neighbors are pikers compared to yours!

  61. 61
    Elizabelle says:

    @Baud:

    Welcome to libertarian paradise!

    Yeah, askew’s got a personal Porcfest going on. Right next door. Lucky dog.

    (WaPost story on the libertarian Burning Man festival, for those who missed it.)

  62. 62
    Elizabelle says:

    Porcfest official website. With pictures.

    They are who we thought they are.

  63. 63
    WaterGirl says:

    @satby: Your soaps are so beautiful! Friends often give me soaps like that as gifts, but I always have to give them away because I am allergic to anything perfume-y and also to lavender and some other herbs.

    I can handle some fruity scents, depending on how they are scented. I wonder if any of your soaps could work for me. Do you use essential oils for your fruit soaps?

  64. 64
    dmsilev says:

    @askew: Let me join the chorus of people saying ‘call the cops’. 4 AM noisefests are something that’s way way outside the bounds of acceptable just about anywhere.

  65. 65
    gene108 says:

    @Baud:

    Saw something on TV about tones people can hear. People in their twenties can still hear tones older folks cannot hear. The ability to hear certain frequencies degrades over time. Teens can hear more than 20-somethings, but 20- somethings can hear frequencies middle aged folks can no hear.

  66. 66
    dmsilev says:

    @gene108: My dad and I tested that once a couple of years ago. He had a dog-whistle app on his phone which could produce tones starting at about 10 kHz and going up to I think about 25 kHz or so (well above the human limit even for good ears, but perfectly fine for dog whistle purposes). I could hear tones a couple of kHz higher than his limit.

    The dog, of course, completely ignored all of the noise.

  67. 67
    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q) says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:

    I may end up relocating my desk to have line-of-sight contact with the Bird Palace so I can type in relative peace.
    We adore him but he’s accustomed to living with an elderly shut-in and expects constant company.

    If that’s feasible, it sounds like a nifty workaround. If seeing his folks keeps him quiet, arrange things so that he can.

  68. 68
    piratedan says:

    imho, creating a paper trail is a good way to go both with your local law enforcement and your petty tyrants at the HOA. Who knows, maybe you can end up making this a two-fer in that when your HOA decides to do nothing based on their previous petty spat with you (based on them fining you for the trash can incident post your previous squabble), you can use this as a lever to restore some sanity to your association and get local law enforcement to do the needful.

  69. 69
    Ksmiami says:

    @Elizabelle: I’d go with what’s up pussycat by tom jones on an endless loop… Should do the trick

  70. 70
    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q) says:

    @Elizabelle: When I saw that group shot, I was amazed by how diverse they are. There are men, women, and children of varying ages. There’s something alike about them all though…

  71. 71
    Elizabelle says:

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q):

    Yes. It was blinding!

  72. 72
    keestadoll says:

    @Elizabelle: Looks like a blast to me, but I’m a sucker for glow in the dark hula hoops. Also, on their update feed: “Can you smell the excitement? It smells like… bacon. And freedom. Bacon-scented freedom.” WIN for the author of that!

  73. 73
    Citizen_X says:

    @Elizabelle:

    They are who we thought they are.

    A typical bunch of New England hippies?

    Also, that setting sure isn’t carved out of ye wilderness primeval. It’s either public, which required a government, or a private events space for hire, which also required an infrastructure, government, etc. As the “Precedent” (yuk yuk, asshole) said, “You didn’t build that.”

  74. 74
    SuperHrefna says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: have you thought about getting him a pal? I know parrots are expensive, but they live such a long time and it might really pay off in the long run if you had two that got along with each other.

  75. 75
    sherparick says:

    From Atrios, quoting from Joseph Heller’s “Catch-22,” published in 1961.

    Teabagged
    Weekend re-run, because I like this.

    “…Major Major’s father was a sober God-fearing man whose idea of a good joke was to lie about his age. He was a longlimbed farmer, a God-fearing, freedom-loving, law-abiding rugged individualist who held that federal aid to anyone but farmers was creeping socialism. He advocated thrift and hard work and disapproved of loose women who turned him down. His specialty was alfalfa, and he made a good thing out of not growing any. The government paid him well for every bushel of alfalfa he did not grow. The more alfalfa he did not grow, the more money the government gave him, and he spent every penny he didn’t earn on new land to increase the amount of alfalfa he did not produce. Major Major’s father worked without rest at not growing alfalfa. On long winter evenings he remained indoors and did not mend harness, and he sprang out of bed at the crack of noon every day just to make certain that the chores would not be done. He invested in land wisely and soon was not growing more alfalfa than any other man in the county. Neighbors sought him out for advice on all subjects, for he had made much money and was therefore wise. “As ye sow, so shall ye reap,” he counseled one and all, and everyone said, “Amen.”

    Major Major’s father was an outspoken champion of economy in government, provided it did not interfere with the sacred duty of government to pay farmers as much as they could get for all the alfalfa they produced that no one else wanted or for not producing any alfalfa at all. He was a proud and independent man who was opposed to unemployment insurance and never hesitated to whine, whimper, wheedle and extort for as much as he could get from whomever he could…”
    http://www.eschatonblog.com/20.....qus_thread

  76. 76
    SuperHrefna says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: In a way parrots are the opposite of cats and dogs: pet owners can go through multiple generations of cats and dogs while parrots can go through multiple generations of humans.( of course unlucky cats and dogs frog through multiple humans too, but it all happens so fast, not like those parrots that live to be 80 or so)

  77. 77
    WaterGirl says:

    @satby: Something just occurred to me – am I remembering correctly that you have been out of work and have been flying through your savings? I thought I saw a comment like that in the past couple of weeks when you were commiserating with someone else who was in a similar, but worse situation.

    If so, your soaps are beautiful, so I think we should have an old-fashioned fundraiser for you where people could buy your beautiful soaps, even as christmas gifts, just purchased a bit early.

    We could help you kick off your new Etsy site, which is really well done, by the way. Some purchase history for you as a vendor might help jump start your sales on Etsy.

    Our local bookstore went out of business when the market fell and no one had any money a few years ago, but I found myself wishing they had had a “we’re going through a rough patch, sale” that might have kept them in business until things picked up.

    If I have you confused with someone else, then I think the “hey, I make cool stuff thread” that Cole periodically puts up would be a nice idea, too.

  78. 78
    Origuy says:

    As I mentioned before, I used to be the president of my HOA. Directors can be petty tyrants, but the rules are there because of situations like askew’s. You said that the management is out of state.Surely there is a local manager to oversee the properties. Find out who that person is. As a member of the HOA, he or she works for you. You said that the property is sublet. Do you mean that the owner has rented it to someone who has sublet it to the problem children living there? Ultimately, it’s the property owner who has the responsibility that the residents of the property follow the rules. The HOA can’t fine the renters, they will go after the owner. Try to get to the owner before the HOA’s property manager does.

  79. 79
    SuperHrefna says:

    @satby: I just bought myself one of your beautiful unscented goat milk soaps! I love the ornate molds you are using and I could really do with something luscious that won’t set off my allergies: https://www.etsy.com/listing/184598502/unscented-goats-milk-soap-no-dyes-or?ref=listing-0

    @WaterGirl, I just saw you have allergies too – check these out! They may be the answer for you.

  80. 80
    coin operated says:

    @Keith P: The HOA I belonged to in Texas was every bit the petty tyrants many of us have experienced. If I’d made the same complaint as you did, they would have cited my neighbor for “unsightly appearance”, which was broadly defined in our by-laws and used as a cudgel for everything from dog droppings to leaving your trash cans out overnight.

    Edited to add…my HOA could be petty tyrants, but there is no doubt that our neighborhood was extremely well kept and our housing values, compared to others in a 5-mile radius, held up well.

  81. 81
    Waspuppet says:

    the newly formed local Tea Party decided it wanted to march down Main Street on the Fourth to protest taxes and government spending. But rather than follow the normal process for a parade permit, the Tea Party stormed a Bozeman City Commission meeting and demanded a parade permit for July 4. The commissioners were so intimidated that they ignored both the usual application process and Montana’s Open Meeting Law. On the spot, the Tea Party was granted a parade permit.

    As always with the Tea Party, substitute “Black Panthers” and I’m betting there’s a sliiiiightly different response.

  82. 82
    WaterGirl says:

    @satby: Are you still here? I have one more question for you.

  83. 83
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:

    I think BellaQ’s right — if it’s relatively unproblematic to move your desk to his line of sight, it’s probably worth doing.

    This website looks interesting, and her advice is to put yourself in the bird’s line of sight. Also, apparently African Greys don’t do well with other birds (unlike some other species of parrots, they form single-species flocks) so getting a companion bird wouldn’t work unless it’s another African Grey. Good news is, the bird is happy to consider you part of the flock and will be fine with just humans around.

  84. 84
    skerry says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: I have friends who have an African Grey. They got a dog to keep it company during the day when they are at work. The bird and the dog get along famously. The bird even calls the dog, who then comes and sits near the cage. They’ve shared some very funny videos of the two. Inter-species friendships are fun.

  85. 85
    gogol's wife says:

    @askew:

    I sympathize. There is nothing worse than bad, noisy neighbors. My only consolation is that they do move eventually. We traded neighbors who left their barky dogs out 24/7 for a nice young man who goes rock-climbing every weekend and never makes a peep when he’s home. It’s a heaven that I couldn’t have imagined when I was dealing with the unresponsive jerks a year ago.

  86. 86
    gogol's wife says:

    @Origuy:

    Good advice.

  87. 87
    trollhattan says:

    @askew:
    #1 Identify the owners, using title search as necessary, and send them a registered letter detailing the problem and demanding they resolve it by some date.
    #2 Sue if/when they don’t permanently fix the problem.

    Take your response to 11.

  88. 88
    LanceThruster says:

    @askew:

    You’re actually lucky that they’re a stationary target. My ex-neighbors’ kids had insanely loud boom stereos in their vehicles as well as overly loud modified exhausts. Plus, their parents were connected with the police (they were FD connected). The cops didn’t do/couldn’t do squat. I had to move (my sister lives there now). I call in their illegal fireworks every 4th to shut down their block party. I tell the dispatcher that if anything catches fire, I’ll use the recorded call as evidence of dereliction of duty. They are truly awful people. I lived there over four decades.

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