Well, now that we’ve all gotten the annual Mothers Day brunch out of the way, what’s the best or worst Mothers Day memories you all have?
When I was nine, my dad was working very hard as a City Manager of a small town in Wyoming. Normally he was on top of things like Mothers Day and birthdays and such, but he’d forgotten this year, and our small town didn’t have much in the way of consumer choice. For just about anything that wasn’t a truck part, a gun, or ranch equipment, you had to go to Denver or order it in the Sears, Wards, or Spiegel catalogs that we still got back in the dark ages of the 1970s and 80s.. Even the state capitol at Cheyenne didn’t have much.
So he forgot Mothers Day. He was leaving the office and his secretary asked him what he was getting my mom for Mothers Day, and he realized his situation. The Wards store was closed, so the only place available was Tru-Value Hardware. Ever since that day, I have remembered sitting in my room listening to my mom downstairs yelling at my dad about the bathroom scales he bought her (he’d vaguely remembered her saying something about needing one) and thought to myself “don’t EVER do that.”
My wife got homemade breakfast from me and my daughter, my son cleaned and washed her car, and I just got done building a raised flower bed while she’s been taking a nap. I’m not the smartest guy around, but I’ll never forget Mothers Day, 1979. In 21 years of marriage, I have never bought bathroom scales.
Also too, open thread
raven
Just pulled in from the haul back from Jekyll. Mothers Day was in evidence all across South and Middle Georgia. It also seems all the candidates are trying to out conservative each other on their signs.
PsiFighter37
Read some interesting stuff on the origins of Mother’s Day. Not surprisingly, it wasn’t always an over-commercialized holiday (grouped in with this bullshit “Moms, Dads, and Grads” crap).
I have my engagement photos in a couple hours in Brooklyn in a couple hours, so I’m focused on getting myself did up properly so I look halfway photogenic.
Citizen_X
@PsiFighter37: Oh, wow. Congratulations!
raven
This ain’t the first time:
BGinCHI
Nothing says “there’s more of you to love” than a nice bathroom scale.
Lee Rudolph
The only Mother’s Day I recall at all is of the one (in 1956 or 1957?) that brought our neighborhood in Cleveland, Ohio, its first (and as far as I know, last) tornado in living memory. We went down to the basement just like you’re supposed to. Lots of trees went down in the woods behind our house (we lived uphill from the Cleveland Zoo, situated in the valley of the imaginatively named Big Creek, a major tributary of the Cuyahoga River), and a few on our street.
Baud
@raven:
Unless one of the signs fires live rounds, I say they all failed.
Iowa Old Lady
I just noticed that someone banged their car door into my front passenger door. The dent is deep. Happy Mother’s Day to me.
BGinCHI
@raven: When is the GOP primary for the Senate seat?
raven
@BGinCHI: the 20th.
raven
@Iowa Old Lady: Dent puller
NotMax
And happy birthday to…
me.
(toots own horn once, softly)
BGinCHI
@raven: Who’s gonna win?
wmd
When I was living in Bloomington I had a tradition for a mother’s day gift. Every spring I’d load a truckload or two of manure (usually horse manure, on occasion goat manure) for fertilizing my vegetable garden and flower beds at my house. So sometime in April I’d have a nice pile of manure by my house. On mother’s day I’d load of a couple of trash cans of manure and deliver it to my mother for her gardens. She loved it.
We both saw the humor in it too. The symbolism has some ambiguity – was I delivering a load of shit to her, or was I giving her gardens enhanced fertility?
Like I said it was a tradition we both enjoyed for many years. I managed to continue a few times after I moved to California, not that I needed manure for a vegetable garden in Indiana at that point, but I do still work on perennial flower beds there and free nitrogenous organic fertilizer is useful. I miss the ritual loading of manure, but now I’ve got chicken manure that only needs to be transported a few feet. Somehow shoveling a wheelbarrow full of chicken manure just isn’t the same as loading a ton or two of horse manure. Somewhere I’ve got a picture of myself shoveling horse manure – I figure when I run for political office again it would be a good campaign picture.
Iowa Old Lady
@raven: Assuming it was a device and not an insult, I googled dent puller. OK. Mr IOL is an engineer. He should be able to manage that.
Comrade Colette Collaboratrice
I got up and showed my husband how to make me a cappuccino, instead of just making one for myself. So, yay? I did get a lovely huge bouquet of roses, the first flowers he’s bought me in a few years, which was nice. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers, and to all those who’ve had one.
raven
@Iowa Old Lady: Indeed. They have them that are a slide hammer and you drill a little hole in the dent and screw it in. They also have suction cups that sometimes work. This reminds me that our windshield got cracked on the drive home.
raven
@BGinCHI: Kingston is the least moronic so we’re hoping he doesn’t. The teabaggers are all over he and Gingery so it’s really a toss up.
Bobby Thomson
That’s one of those “Don’t go in the house!” stories. He obviously did a lot of other things right.
Lee Rudolph
@Iowa Old Lady:
Assuming it was a device and not an insult, I googled dent puller
My working assumption was that Dent Puller was a Republican candidate for something or other (possibly related to Chesty Puller, USMC).
Mustang Bobby
When I was a kid we always gave Mom lilies of the valley since they are her favorite flower on Mother’s Day. My sister is carrying on the tradition (I hope) since she lives near my parents.
Next Monday is Mom’s birthday so all the kids and grandkids colluded to buy her a new computer so she can keep up with the blogs. She is far more active and progressive than I am and she’s a constant commenter on the blog (“Faithful Correspondent” is her handle). This new one has Windows 7 because at her age — or any age, really — having Microsoft move the food dish yet again is way too much hassle.
Mustang Bobby
@raven: Someone needs an intervention. Or a spanking.
James E. Powell
@Lee Rudolph:
I remember a tornado that hit Strongsville in the mid-60s. Memory is vague but it wasn’t too many year after my family moved from Garfield Heights to Brecksville. It was pretty unusual. Tornadoes are mostly associated with the flat parts of Ohio to the west and south.
nancydarling
@raven: Broun is an idiot in spite of having M.D. after his name. I recall him on C-SPAN when there was concern about a swine flu a few years back. One of his words of wisdom to stop its spread was not picking your nose. His son probably got the same caliber of advice about driving under the influence. Gingery is probably dumber than Broun.
mai naem mobile
@raven: that’s some awesome family values bringing up that kid.
satby
One son working, the other moved to California 2 months ago. I miss when they were little and made me cold toast and soggy cereal and cold coffee with too much sugar for my Mother’s Day breakfast in bed.
Luckily for their significant others, they both grew up to be excellent cooks.
Villago Delenda Est
@raven: That’s also the day of Oregon’s primary election, which is a serious snooze fest this year. The only thing that’s generating much excitement, statewide, is who the GOP will pick to take on Jeff Merkley in the fall. No ballot measures to generate any interest. Very locally, there are some contested county commissioner races…the three incumbents are all crony capitalist sleazeballs who got their dicks caught in a wringer when their county administrator selection got caught with her hand in the till.
Villago Delenda Est
@Mustang Bobby: Who needs the spanking? The father? There’s probably some woman in leather providing that already, knowing how Rethugs roll…
raven
@Lee Rudolph: Chesty’s son Lewis was a tragic case indeed. He wrote a Pulitzer Prize winning book called “Fortunate Son” after losing both legs and most of a hand in Vietnam. He did well for a number of years and then killed himself after battling alcohol and pain killer addition.
Villago Delenda Est
@Comrade Colette Collaboratrice:
Well, that leaves Rush Limbaugh out of things.
raven
@nancydarling: Who you tellin, he’s our rep.
raven
@Villago Delenda Est: We have an interesting mayoral race with two candidates named Denson. The incumbent worked in city/county government for years and is an establishment candidate . The challenger is a hipster with a tattoo parlor who was big in occupy. Our city council district race is another pickle that has me staying completely out of it because I know 3 of the 4 pretty well.
PsiFighter37
@Citizen_X: Thanks! Although, from the sample set of friends who are engaged/married already, we waited a bit long to do these (we’ve been engaged 2 years to the date, now that I think about it), and the wedding’s in 4 months. That said, hard to ask for better weather than it is today in NY (high 70s, pure sunshine)…especially since today is the only nice day sandwiched between a bunch of rain.
Bob In Portland
Your tax dollars at work.
Bob In Portland
Your tax dollars at work.
Pogonip
@wmd: Now, that’s a Mother’s Day present!
I have a cold for Mother’s Day. I’m sure my kid has something for me but we put off the get-together till tomorrow. Likewise with my mom; don’t want to share the wealth with anybody.
Villago Delenda Est
@Bob In Portland: HODOR!
Villago Delenda Est
@raven: Ma and Pa Denson?
PA: More meat at dinner!
MA: No, you’ll eat your broccoli and like it!
Bob In Portland
From India.
ruemara
Best & worst? Hmm. Worst: calling up my mother to tell her I had DVT-with no insurance because I had just left the job that had lied to me for nearly a year about my position-and that it could be serious. I didn’t want anything to happen and for her to feel awful because I hadn’t said anything. She said, “I’m sorry, I can’t help you, I don’t have any money for you” and hung up. Even after growing up with her, it was a surprise. My stepfather had to call me back to find out what DVT even meant.
Best: I got nothin’. I’ve had some very nice women in my life who’ve been as near as I think having a mother is like, so I’m grateful. And I’ve not been horrible to these little guys, who I miss eternally. I’m not sure if it will be good for them to be removed from where they are now, but they are so awesome. The current roommate’s cat only reminds me of the super awesome duo I used to be the mama to.
JGabriel
From God’s Twitter (via digby):
cckids
Not a Mother’s Day present, but my dad got a lot of grief at one time for giving Mom a dishwasher for Christmas. Friends & siblings ribbed him about giving her an appliance, but she LOVED it.
When I got to be an adult, I realized that, back in the early 70’s, a dishwasher for a woman who had 6 kids under the age of 10 was probably a godsend. He even wrapped it & put it by the tree.
raven
@Villago Delenda Est: Check him out.
Comrade Scrutinizer
@NotMax: Happy birthday, NotMax. I passed mine yesterday with little fanfare, except that my daughter, who stopped speaking to me years ago, sent me a text message wishing me a happy birthday. Discombobulating, that was.
Villago Delenda Est
Noisemax hilarity:
Trey Gowdy: Benghazi Panel Won’t Be ‘Kangaroo Court’
Also, too, the sun will rise in the West on the day the Benghazi panel convenes.
gogol's wife
@NotMax:
Happy Birthday!
gogol's wife
Commenter RSA has a beautiful essay in the NYTimes “Modern Love” series today:
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/05/11/fashion/Modern-Love-Promises-That-Can-Bend-Without-Breaking.html?ref=fashion&_r=0
He told us about it yesterday, but I waited for my dead-tree version to come to read it.
gogol's wife
@Villago Delenda Est:
I keep thinking Trey Gowdy must be a sportscaster, but I googled him and saw he’s yet another hideous Republican. They have an endless supply, don’t they?
Villago Delenda Est
@raven: Tim, I take it, is the hipster guy?
hilts
2 songs for all the great mothers out there
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDjjWpLKsGM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-62QgzmcDQ
Happy Mothers Day
raven
@Villago Delenda Est: Yea and here is granny Nancy.
Elizabelle
@Iowa Old Lady:
It were a mother that did that car damage.
scav
@Villago Delenda Est: Aaaahhhh! Kangaroos on broomsticks! They must exist! Or, are they Schrödinger’s Kangaroo Koven, both being and not being a Court or a Hunt depending on the person observing.
Iowa Old Lady
@Lee Rudolph: @Elizabelle: Hee. Balloon Juice always makes me feel better.
Morzer
@NotMax:
Happy Birthday, ageing person.
Botsplainer
Dealing with a teary-eyed spouse who is all emotion over our youngest daughter leaving Tuesday to spend the summer on an archaeological dig in Albania.
They spent Friday night and most of Saturday together.
Morzer
@Villago Delenda Est:
In the most recent news raven, learn how Westeros is being invaded by CIA-funded White Walkers, how Tyrion Lannister is really a fat little white Nazi stormtrooper, and how the Iron Bank is organizing death squads in Braavos in coordination with the Hilary Rodham Lannister campaign.
Svensker
@NotMax:
Happy BD!
askew
Today is pretty much the worst mother’s day I can think of. Mom is at the hospital with Dad who stopped being able to walk yesterday afternoon. Spent night in ER waiting for news. Turns out he has a cancerous tumor pressing on his spine making him unable to walk. He has stage 4 cancer and from the time it was diagnosed 2 weeks ago, it’s been a rapid progression of bad news. And this is mom’s first mother’s day without her mother who died right before Thanksgiving.
Svensker
@askew:
Aw, honey, so sorry. That is rotten and horrible. Big hugs to you all.
gogol's wife
@askew:
I’m so sorry. That sounds horrible.
RSA
@gogol’s wife: Thanks!
All day I’ve been getting email from people I don’t know. Some say they were touched by the essay; some tell me a story about themselves and their loved ones; sometimes they just offer encouragement. Pretty wonderful people. They lift my spirits.
Nethead Jay
@gogol’s wife: That’s a wonderful piece of writing. Got something in my eye all of a sudden…
scav
@askew: absolute ow. best to all of you.
srv
@RSA: Well done, in every way.
raven
@RSA: We have friends in a similar situation but her tumor was malignant. They went to Duke two years ago (shortly after she retired) for the surgery and for the follow up. All that you wrote resonates with us in the strongest way. My wife has done a great deal of support with her and I’ve been more so with her husband. Best to you and her.
Nethead Jay
@askew: Damn, that sucks like a giant black hole. Wish you and your whole family peace and strength.
hitchhiker
Okay, well . . . I was one of 8 kids. Our mom worked full time and drank a lot when she wasn’t sleeping. Our dad was often laid off; his main interest was television.
I didn’t understand the fuss about mothering until I wandered into an Al-Anon meeting after it became painfully obvious that I had a thing for drunks.
I was so lucky, my god. There were 3 or 4 very smart, kind, no-bullshit women there who literally loved me into adulthood. Those meetings — and I went every single day for more than a year — were the one place I’d ever been where you could only “win” if you told the the absolute truth.
I didn’t even know how much I was lying when I got there, and I don’t know how else I ever could have figured it out.
So, thanks for my life, Al-Anon moms. You gave it to me when I didn’t even know enough to want it.
The Other Bob
I owe a lot to at least four mothers in my life:
My own mom.
My wife and mother to our kids.
The two women who I have never met that gave birth to our children. One a long drive away, one a long plane ride.
satby
@NotMax: Happy Birthday! Hope it’s been excellent so far!
satby
@askew: Hugs askew, sorry to hear all that.
ranchandsyrup
moar Mother’s Day blogging from my spouse.
JPL
@RSA: I went to the NY TImes facebook page and the support was over-whelming. If John posts tonight before my bedtime, I’m going to put a link up. Not only would he be moved, I’m sure his mom would be sending you cookies.
It’s not worth sending him an email cuz he doesn’t read them.
Yatsuno
@askew: *hug* We’re here if you need us.
ruemara
@askew: So sorry, askew. Biggest of hugs and bestest of vibes out to you and yours.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@gogol’s wife: Beautiful is an understatement. Thanks for linking it.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@NotMax: Happy Birthday indeed.
opiejeanne
@Comrade Scrutinizer: Happy Birthday to you.
I hope the message from your daughter means she is reconsidering her shutting you out.
opiejeanne
@NotMax: Happy birthday!
opiejeanne
@askew: Oh my, I’m so sorry.
I’m feeling my orphanhood very keenly today, even though I lost my mom 11 years ago and Dad 2 years ago. The girls are both on the East coast but they called. I haven’t heard from my son today but that’s par for the course, he’s kind of a thoughtless person.
kideni
@askew: I’m really sorry about that, askew.
My husband’s Mother’s Day this year is the worst, because she died this morning. Had she lived to tomorrow, she would have been 89. Yesterday afternoon, she apparently fell during the three hours between my nephew stopping by for a chat and my sister-in-law’s husband checking on her in the late afternoon. She was pretty frail already, and apparently the trauma was too much. Her last words came last night, when my husband was on the phone with her and she was still lucid, and she told him she loved him. They’re all down in Florida, and we’re in Wisconsin, so we’re waiting to find out when the funeral is so that we can make arrangements to get down there.
opiejeanne
@gogol’s wife: OMC, that is making me cry, it’s so touching. They are both so young.
My own mother suffered from more than one type of dementia so this really hits home, but my mother was in her 80s.
opiejeanne
@kideni: I’m so sorry. My mom had Alzheimers but died of a fall. Hit her head on the dresser when Dad was helping her get out of bed, 24 hours later she lapsed into a coma and never woke up.
She had a shunt in her skull to drain fluid from a benign arachnoid cyst and the docs think that’s what gave her the extra day, which she spent with us; she was content.
NotMax
Mucho mahalo for the birthday wishes.
J R in WV
@RSA:
It was a wonderful essay, I told you earlier how sorry I was about your wife’s illness, but your essay shows how much you feel for her yourself.
Hang in there; you have hundreds of internet friends who will offer unconditional emotional support for your situation. You have done the best you can for her, and she knows deep inside, so far, that things are OK because you are there for her.
Thanks for sharing with us, as well.
RSA
@J R in WV: Thanks, JR, and thanks to everyone else who has commented.
My wife’s best friend of some 25 years (who now lives in WV, coincidentally) has been staying with us since Friday. It’s been a good weekend for all of us–sitting in the sunshine, looking at old photos, talking about past travels and missed friends. Small enjoyments that have become important to me.