PX Rangers

Tough guys are always found on Sunday shows:

BROOKS: Basically since Yalta we’ve had an assumption that borders are basically going to be borders and once that comes into question if in Ukraine or in Crimea or anywhere else, then all over the world all bets are off. And let’s face it, Obama, whether deservedly or not, does have a — I’ll say it crudely — but a manhood problem in the Middle East. Is he tough enough to stand up to somebody like Assad or somebody like Putin? I think a lot of the rap is unfair but certainly in the Middle East there is an assumption that he’s not tough enough.

I’m basically coming to the conclusion that all Republican men are either closeted homosexuals or very, very bothered about the inadequacies of their own penis.

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71 replies
  1. 1
    Chris says:

    And let’s face it, Obama, whether deservedly or not, does have a — I’ll say it crudely — but a manhood problem in the Middle East. Is he tough enough to stand up to somebody like Assad or somebody like Putin? I think a lot of the rap is unfair but certainly in the Middle East there is an assumption that he’s not tough enough.

    And Putin invaded Georgia because Obama wasn’t manly enough. After all, who’s this “George W. Bush” character of which we speak?

  2. 2
    Ruckus says:

    I’m basically coming to the conclusion that all Republican men are either closeted homosexuals or very, very bothered about the inadequacies of their own penis.

    This seems to have taken you much too long to decide.

  3. 3
    DH says:

    A real man resorts to violence only as a last resort. Brooks is nothing but a moron.

  4. 4
    Triumph says:

    Perhaps we should ask Osama bin Laden about this perceived manhood problem.

  5. 5
    Kevin says:

    Is the sniveling whiner David Brooks the best person to talk about manliness? Seriously, every time I see him talk, I want to hop in a Dolorian and beat up the younger David Brooks. He has turned me into a time traveling bully.

  6. 6
    Iowa Old Lady says:

    Any man that concerned about some other guy’s manliness has a problem.

  7. 7
    LosGatosCA says:

    Let’s face it, Republicans have had a man hood problem since Teddy Roosevelt turned the office over to Taft. They think talking tough and carrying a small penis is a winner for them.

  8. 8
    PurpleGirl says:

    How it should be phrased: President Obama is not manly enough to send young Americans someplace to die in combat. (Or to become so wounded that their lives are forever changed.) Brooks was born in Canada; has he become an American citizen yet?

    ETA: And since he is too hold to join the military now, he should STFU.

  9. 9
    JGabriel says:

    Obama, whether deservedly or not, does have a — I’ll say it crudely — but a manhood problem in the Middle East. Is he tough enough to stand up to somebody like Assad or somebody like Putin? I think a lot of the rap is unfair but certainly in the Middle East there is an assumption that he’s not tough enough.

    I’m just curious: why the fuck does David Brooks think he knows anything about anyone’s reputation in the Middle East? When was the last time Brooks spoke to a cab driver in Riyadh?

  10. 10
    geg6 says:

    David Brooks couldn’t find his pen1s with tweezers and a magnifying glass. Bin Laden won’t be arguing about Obama’s manliness. He found out about it the hard way. If only he’d do the same for David Brooks…

  11. 11
    Professor says:

    Can someone tell me whether David Brooks has ever fought in any of the many wars the USA has fought during his lifetime? Or is he one of those armchair generals?

  12. 12
    MattF says:

    Brooks has a collection of attitudes, but no actual ideas.

  13. 13
    OldBean says:

    @Kevin:

    Is the sniveling whiner David Brooks the best person to talk about manliness?

    It’s called “projection”.

  14. 14
    karen says:

    So that’s it! The GOP and their media (Everyone, not just Fox News) are so vicious and hateful towards Obama because his “manhood” is bigger than theirs!

  15. 15
    JGabriel says:

    Kevin:

    Is the sniveling whiner David Brooks the best person to talk about manliness?

    David Brooks:

    I sat next to a Republican senator once at dinner and he had his hand on my inner thigh the whole time. I was like, ehh, get me out of here.

    Yeah, I think a guy who doesn’t have the balls to ask a Republican senator to take his hand off the guy’s inner thigh, probably isn’t someone who should be questioning other people’s masculinity.

  16. 16
    Boots Day says:

    And of course, when Obama intervened in Libya, the Republicans decided not that he was a manly man but rather a dictator putting American lives at risk.

  17. 17
    Mike G says:

    @Chris:

    I’m basically coming to the conclusion that all Republican men are either closeted homosexuals or very, very bothered about the inadequacies of their own penis.

    I’m sure Putin just quivered in his boots in the last decade at the thought of upsetting the dry-drunk fratboy Potemkin-rancher who proclaimed he had “looked into his soul”, and referred to him as “Pooty-poot”.

    Bush would have been the easiest mark ever for a trained KGB operative — if Putin had flattered him with some crap about Jesus and Churchill, he’d probably have sold Alaska back to Russia at the original price.

  18. 18
    Narcissus says:

    @JGabriel: He didn’t say he wanted the hand off his thigh, he just wanted the senator to get him out of there, and presumably into something more comfortable.

  19. 19
    Amir Khalid says:

    David Brooks is a very silly person, isn’t he? Getting into other people’s fights for no good reason is a sure way to lose them. Do Brooks and the rest of his ilk look at every conflict and see another World War 2 for America to be heroic in?

  20. 20
    PurpleGirl says:

    Damn, I should have checked Wikipedia first. Brooks’ father was an American citizen who was living in Canada, so Brooks could be citizen by birth if they registered him.

    However, he has never served in any branch of the armed services, so he should still STFU. (He covered Russia for one of his news reporting jobs but he didn’t live there and apparently doesn’t speak Russian.)

    That man is more than idiot.

  21. 21
    John O says:

    Exactly, John!

    I read this earlier today and thought immediately that every problem can be resolved in the conservative mind by whipping out a gun or a penis. It’s very creepy.

  22. 22
    Cacti says:

    When Brooks talks about manhood, what he means is unnecessary war. GOPers are still bummed out that Dubya couldn’t deliver shooting wars with Iran and Syria after cocking up Iraq so abysmally.

  23. 23
    RobertDSC-Power Mac G5 Dual says:

    Brooks should ask Osama Bin Laden about Barack Obama’s “manhood problem”.

  24. 24
    Mike G says:

    Do Brooks and the rest of his ilk look at every conflict and see another World War 2 for America to be heroic in?

    Right-wingers grew up believing John Wayne movies were documentaries, so they feel a gaping hole of guilt in their soul for not having “proven their manliness” in combat.

    There’s no limit to the number of American soldiers the 101st Chairborne Chickenhawks will send to die in pointless ego exercises to vicariously assuage their feelings of cowardice.

  25. 25
    Grumpy Code Monkey says:

    I’m basically coming to the conclusion that all Republican men are either closeted homosexuals or very, very bothered about the inadequacies of their own penis.

    That’s not an exclusive-or.

    The rest of it can be summarized as “Negro”. And yes, as time goes on, I’m becoming more and more convinced it really is that simple.

  26. 26
    Mandalay says:

    Obama, whether deservedly or not, does have a — I’ll say it crudely — but a manhood problem in the Middle East.

    That statement crystalizes why Brooks is far worse, and far more dishonest, than your average wingnut. He carefully excludes himself from the bogus accusation, so when there’s blowback he can distance himself from his own remarks.

    Cowardice in the extreme.

  27. 27
    MattF says:

    @Cacti: Yeah, I think Brooks would be a neocon if he had the guts. He’s just failing on several levels here.

  28. 28
    gwangung says:

    @Cacti:

    When Brooks talks about manhood, what he means is unnecessary war. GOPers are still bummed out that Dubya couldn’t deliver shooting wars with Iran and Syria after cocking up Iraq so abysmally.

    GOPers still don’t quite get that the “cocking up” is a natural result of intervention. You are NEVER going to “win” wars as the GOP imagines.

  29. 29
    the Conster says:

    I’ve been convinced since before Obama that most of the wars throughout history could have been avoided by just having a dick measuring contest. The only problem being that if that were actually a thing, it couldn’t be done because shrivel.

  30. 30
    🌷 Martin says:

    To conservatives, ‘leadership’ means doing things they don’t have the stones to do. So, torture is fine. Spying is fine. They’ll tolerate that of a Republican because they want Republicans to be leaders, even though they know that it crosses a line with the public. If Obama does it, they’ll jump all over the fact that he crossed that line.

    Thats why Libya was so revealing. Obama did what they want a Republican to do, but they couldn’t really reconcile their desire to bomb Gaddafi with their desire to see Obama weak, so he was both a lawless dictator and gutless for not going in harder. I’m pretty sure that’s why Benghazi is such a thing for the GOP – it’s a way to paper over Obama’s actions in Libya to ensure he never gets credit there.

  31. 31

    I’m basically coming to the conclusion that all Republican men are either closeted homosexuals or very, very bothered about the inadequacies of their own penis.

    Which makes me even more certain that my team really needs to have an admissions committee. Applicants will have to prove they are worthy, and getting felt up at a dinner does not qualify. We will demand character references, too.

    I will bring it up again at the next Radical Homosexual meeting and add it to our agenda.

  32. 32
    Ruckus says:

    @PurpleGirl:

    That man is more than idiot.

    He really isn’t any more than that. He may not be stupid/uneducated, but he is just a fucking idiot.

  33. 33
    Mnemosyne says:

    @karen:

    The GOP and their media (Everyone, not just Fox News) are so vicious and hateful towards Obama because his “manhood” is bigger than theirs!

    They buy into all of the other traditional racist beliefs, so I don’t see any reason to think they don’t buy into that one, too.

    @Mike G:

    Right-wingers grew up believing John Wayne movies were documentaries, so they feel a gaping hole of guilt in their soul for not having “proven their manliness” in combat.

    Apparently Wayne himself felt the same gaping hole of guilt for not going to WWII and way overcompensated to make up for it. So this is second (or third) generation chickenhawkery at this point.

  34. 34
    Ruckus says:

    @Mnemosyne:
    Footsteps of idiocy.

    If you don’t choose your leaders wisely, or choose wise leaders, you will end up with idiots following idiots. Or, more specifically, our current conservative political party.

  35. 35
    the Conster says:

    Also I’ve come to fully appreciate that real men are Democrats. If I meet a man and find out he’s a Republican, I automatically know a few things about him – he’s either or all of: a closeted self-hating gay; a tiny dicked loser; a clueless moron; a wife beater who probably has a secret arsenal; or an overcompensated white guy who is afraid of being found out he’s been surfing on his white privilege and is terrified of being found out – a/k/a the David Brooks of the world.

  36. 36
    Suffern ACE says:

    It is very possible that Obama’s manhood is fine. I think Assad has a political problem, but I’m willing to consider it stems from masculinity issues. How was his relationship with his father?

  37. 37
    Bex says:

    Can’t wait to see what Moral Hazard has to say about this.

  38. 38
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    I would like to be a fly on the wall when the president is told that David Brooks questioned his manhood. I bet that Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock or even Dave Chappelle could such Guffaws.

  39. 39
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Amir Khalid: yes, they do. And yes, it is silly. There are no number of disputes that they wish to solve where the answer should be “ok. You two decide it. I’ll be over here doing my own thing.” The worst part is, they insist on taking sides in every damn dispute. They want to be the referee and the tag team partner.

  40. 40
    Baud says:

    Glad to know that electing Republicans means my taxes are going to be spent to support their manhood. Another reason to elect Democrats.

  41. 41
    RandomMonster says:

    This is one of your best comments ever, John :)

  42. 42
    chopper says:

    @JGabriel:

    I sat next to a Republican senator once at dinner and he had his hand on my inner thigh the whole time. I was like, ehh, get me out of here.

    if this statement doesn’t say ‘sun-chapped stud’ i’ll eat my hat.

  43. 43
    AxelFoley says:

    @Triumph:

    Perhaps we should ask Osama bin Laden about this perceived manhood problem.

    You would think that would shut them up, but noooooo…

  44. 44
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    Like the gelded shithead Brooks knows anything about “manhood”.

    The sooner his exsanguinated, broken body is found in a back alley, the better.

  45. 45
    Patrick says:

    Basically since Yalta we’ve had an assumption that borders are basically going to be borders and once that comes into question if in Ukraine or in Crimea or anywhere else, then all over the world all bets are off.

    I wonder why Brooks didn’t include Iraq when his hero Bush ignored the Iraqi borders…

  46. 46
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @Mike G:

    so they feel a gaping hole of guilt in their soul for not having “proven their manliness” in combat.

    Well, the deserting coward and the Dark Lord both had more than enough chances to sign up and get into the shit in ‘Nam, but unlike Al Gore and John Kerry, they had “other priorities” than demonstrating what studly men they were by humping an M16 through a rice paddy.

    Both of them deserve 1000 painful deaths for their obvious cowardice.

  47. 47
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @Mnemosyne: Actual WWII combat Marines had nothing but contempt for John Wayne.

    To this day, drill sergeants use “John Wayne” as a disparaging term for someone who is showboating with a weapon.

  48. 48
    Cassidy says:

    so they feel a gaping hole of guilt in their soul for not having “proven their manliness” in combat.

    Recruiting offices rarely close. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

  49. 49
    Linnaeus says:

    “Manliness” does not mean having to solve every problem with violence. I think Corey Robin makes a good point in The Reactionary Mind about the conservative attitude toward violence.

  50. 50
    Gravenstone says:

    John, to parallel your post title I’ll just drop this here.

  51. 51
    James E. Powell says:

    Basically since Yalta we’ve had an assumption that borders are basically going to be borders and once that comes into question if in Ukraine or in Crimea or anywhere else, then all over the world all bets are off.

    Making or agreeing with this statement requires one to disregard much of the last 60 years of US foreign policy and military/CIA actions. He can’t be that ignorant, right? He knows he is lying, right?

  52. 52
    James E. Powell says:

    Basically since Yalta we’ve had an assumption that borders are basically going to be borders and once that comes into question if in Ukraine or in Crimea or anywhere else, then all over the world all bets are off.

    Making or agreeing with this statement requires one to disregard much of the last 60 years of US foreign policy and military/CIA actions. He can’t be that ignorant, right? He knows he is lying, right?

  53. 53
    LanceThruster says:

    Not everyone can be a big swinging dick like Rambobo.

  54. 54
    pete says:

    @James E. Powell: He really said that? Pakistan would like a word; and so would Bangla Desh.

  55. 55
    FlipYrWhig says:

    Apart from everything else, does Brooks think Obama has a “manhood problem” in the Middle East, or everywhere? He shifts from “the Middle East” to “Putin” pretty quickly, and, ya know, those aren’t really the same issue. Is he supposed to treat Putin a certain way to get a certain reaction from the Middle East, or the Middle East a certain way to get a certain reaction from Putin, or something else? Or does he even know what he’s saying other than “dickless”?

  56. 56
    Petorado says:

    Conservatives have a special relationship with death and cruelty because it’s the only means they have of protecting their favorable status. When you know you can’t compete for life at the top of the pile in the realms of intelligence or physical prowess, cruelty is the best way to keep the position you inherited as a member of the lucky sperm club.

  57. 57
    GregB says:

    By this manhood standard I assume that Obama should send in the federal troops to massacre the entire Bundy clan, butcher every cow and salt the earth in Nevada because he if he doesn’t he’ll appear weak and Putin, Assad and Ayman Zawahiri can smell weakness like a wolf.

  58. 58
  59. 59

    @Villago Delenda Est: John Wayne was a vain drug-abusing serial-married wife-beater whose children hated and feared him. Or, as they say, a GOP role model.

  60. 60
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Mustang Bobby:

    Well, more of a drunk than a drug abuser, but mostly on point.

  61. 61
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @PurpleGirl:

    However, he has never served in any branch of the armed services, so he should still STFU.

    I cannot tell you how strongly I disagree with the implication that only someone who has served in the military has a right to comment about military policy.

  62. 62
    Seanly says:

    I’m basically coming to the conclusion that all Republican men are either closeted homosexuals or very, very bothered about the inadequacies of their own penis.

    Can’t it be both?

  63. 63
    qwerty42 says:

    I really think the neocons could do with some therapy. Probably a solid Freudian. They seem to have … certain issues.

  64. 64
    Lurking Canadian says:

    @James E. Powell: You have to insert the phrase “white people’s” before the first occurrence of the word “borders” in order to parse what he’s really saying here. The lines the simple brown folk draw on their little maps are of no concern to a towering intellect like David Brooks.

  65. 65
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Yeah, but Brooks has no basis at all to comment on Obama’s “mancred”.

  66. 66
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @Linnaeus: One of the things Robin points out is that Burke had this thing about the “sublimity” of war that could only be sustained if you didn’t actually get involved with it yourself. All that sheer butchery was for the little people…you were supposed to, as a proper conservative, be removed from it and groove on it from a distance.

    Something that Dick Cheney could very well appreciate as he jerked off to torture videos.

  67. 67
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Villago Delenda Est: Well, no shit, but that’s because Brooks has none as far as I know. Not even the Al Bundy kind based on his dragging his ass to a crappy job day after day to take care of his family. Brooks is a courtier, but one without any accomplishments outside the court.

  68. 68
    Patricia Kayden says:

    So was there any progressive journalist to respond to Brooks’ ridiculous comments about President Obama’s manliness? I’ve stopped watching Sunday morning shows because it seems that conservatives get to make wild, unsubstantiated comments without any pushback from hosts or other panelists.

  69. 69
    BobS says:

    Which category did you belong in during the early days of your blog?

  70. 70
    Davo says:

    I was enjoying my sunday morning, perusing the interwebs and half-listening to Brooks inanities in the background… then he said the manhood thing and I immediately looked up and smiled. “The commentariat is gunna have fun with that one!”

  71. 71
    Ella in New Mexico says:

    Something like 670, 000 people in the 25-54 year-old demographic watched Meet the Press on April 13, with 894,000 tuning in to Face the Nation. The good news is that Fox is last with 420,000 (not counting the Spanish language Univision network). All the Sunday talk shows have so destroyed their former reputations for giving us fresh, informed and diverse debate that they’re pretty much breathing agonally right now.

    So really, without the post-broadcast geysers of insider blog posts telling everyone what he said, Brooks would just fade into the oblivion of insignificance. But NOOOOO, they simply can’t resist….

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