Stop This Man Before He Drives Again

Spent the whole day looking for excuses to drive the new car.

“Hey, I need to go to the post office and check my mail!”

“It’s been three weeks since I had a hair cut. I should drive to Wellsburg and get one.”

One of my fraternity boys called and wanted to talk- “I’ll be up at the house in five minutes and we can take a drive down Castleman Run (a scenic backroad).”

Really happy with my purchase, although I know some of you are sick and tired of hearing about it, but big purchases for me are a product of prolonged angst and prodigious research. When I buy something like this, it is as if I feel psychic birthing pains. It took me three months to decide on which amp and pre-amp to buy when I was in the Army in 1991, and to this day I still have the same Adcom amp and Adcom Pre-Amp powering my stereo, so I guess it is worth it.

It’s just really such an amazing ride, and I test drove 2014 models of a variety of cars, and this one was just the best.

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78 replies
  1. 1

    How do the doggies like the car? What about Steve?

  2. 2
    gbear says:

    I can relate. The weather finally warmed up enough for me to get my scooter out last weekend (after 10″ of snow on friday!). I ran a lot of recreational errands.

  3. 3
    Avery Greynold says:

    Something something out in the field please hate me.

  4. 4
    🍀 Martin says:

    Thank you Ron Johnson and Bill Kramer for breaking our streak of Democratic malfeasance. California appreciates the effort.

    I don’t think it’ll take down Johnson, but this story doesn’t help their efforts winning over women voters.

  5. 5
    Olivia says:

    I love hearing all about the car and you driving the car and the color and how it drives so just keep talking!

  6. 6
    efgoldman says:

    It’s been three weeks since I had a hair cut.

    I thought you cut your hair with the pet floofer thingie.

  7. 7
    TaMara (BHF) says:

    As someone who just made a new car purchase and had to wait four months after I ordered it, I understand the need to drive. Where are my keys….there must be an errand to run.

  8. 8
    Pogonip says:


    You know, it occurs to me that a good troll-remover would be to replace all the troll’s comments with “Hodor” until it gives up and goes away. Maybe Cleek could make such a program?

  9. 9
    Pogonip says:

    Not to imply that John is trolling his own blog.

  10. 10
    🍀 Martin says:

    @TaMara (BHF): Children are great for this. The day I got my last car I realized that the children were in urgent need of ice cream! From some place far away! So we get there, they get their giant ice cream cones, and they both spill them in the back seat. Which is awesome! It an Element! No carpet! Waterproof seats!

  11. 11
    Howard Beale IV says:

    Adcom’s good shit-no need to fret over that.

    Now if ya wanna go Home theater, Go Yamaha Aventage and be done with it.

  12. 12
    gbear says:

    I saw what Mr. Cole did there. Yay.

  13. 13
    ronin122 says:

    So what’s next? Getting laid or getting it stuck in a field again?

  14. 14
    🍀 Martin says:

    @ronin122: Dude, it’s farmer Boner’s field. You’re getting laid while stuck in the field.

  15. 15
    Baud says:


    Getting laid or getting it stuck in a field again?

    In West Virginia, those two things are the same.

  16. 16
    SiubhanDuinne says:


    That made me laugh. Unfortunately, since I have been suffering mightily the past few days from an excess of pollen, the laugh quickly turned into a horrible death-rattle of a coughing fit, and it’s taken me about ten minutes to recover.

    But what you said was the funny.

  17. 17
    NotMax says:

    It’s been three weeks since I had a hair cut.

    Twenty-five years since last had one. Really.

    Nice to hear you’re reaping maximum enjoyment from the newest pet.

  18. 18
    Belafon says:

    John reminds me of Gwen Stefani after she got married. No Doubt’s happy songs aren’t nearly as good.

  19. 19
    Marquis says:

    We just bought one of these also and just love driving it. The amazing thing about this car is that I feel like the car actually handles best while making tight turns on somewhat crappy roads. It just makes you feel like you have total control. It is solid and peppy enough to be fun to drive.

  20. 20
    Jay C says:


    I thought you cut your hair with the pet floofer thingie.

    He probably broke it attempting to shave Steve’s ass.
    Hey! There’s another errand John can go run in his new car!

    (Getting a new pet floofer thingie, that is, not shaving Steve’s ass. Though I’m sure if the latter job needs an auto to accomplish, Our John will find a way)

  21. 21
    srv says:

    I was going to be looking at cars.

    Maybe I should just buy an amplifier. Rogue or Adcom?

  22. 22
    Arthur says:

    My family is Subaru through an through.

    Bought a 1994 Legacy wagon in 1996 for an over the road sales job that covered western PA and east OH…Lake Erie and Cleveland areas. Sold that car for $500 cash in November 2012; 287,000 miles.

    Wife drives a 2012 Tribeca (she loves it), I drive a 2010 Forester, and WVU student son drives 2000 Outback sedan.

  23. 23

    Yo’ouns got a SuperCuts over ta Wellsburg?

    Well I’ll be. (A long, long way from my roots.)

    Enjoy the drive(s)! This is the time of year to make the best of the middle of nowhere.

  24. 24
    ruemara says:

    I wound up with a $1060 bill for: new starter, new battery (installer damaged the innard wires), brake hydraulic hoses needing replacement and serpentine belt is cracking. The ‘rents think I should just go find a new car. I see the little nest egg of 1500 I scraped up is going to hatch and fly. New car = new payments, more insurance and I just got the new job.

    So now I’m walking about 4 miles a day or so between two jobs and home. We both got new transportation, mine is just coming in bits and pieces and now, I’m much fitter.

  25. 25
    Hal says:

    Now all you need is an Obama bumper sticker and some Sarah Palin fan will force you off the road and ask how the hopey changey thing is working out.

  26. 26
    efgoldman says:


    But what you said was the funny.

    Thanks. I try.
    Maybe it’s an age thing? I’m getting spring allergies this year for the first time. Usually I’m a sneezy basket case in August.

  27. 27
    dollared says:

    Wow. I guess we won’t get one of your epic rants until you tear the front CV boot thrashing around some corner with the gas pedal on the floor.

  28. 28
    Chickamin Slam says:

    I’ll mail you a postcard so you can take that trip to the Post Office.

  29. 29
    Keith G says:


  30. 30
    Fair Economist says:

    Just make sure you cash the product placement checks from Subaru promptly. It’s a real pain if you wait until they expire and have to get them reissued.

    Edit: and yes, you can drive to the bank to cash the check.

  31. 31
    AliceBlue says:

    Congratulations John! How ’bout a picture?

  32. 32
    Violet says:

    They really do drive great. Enjoy your new ride!

  33. 33
    trollhattan says:


    Plinius. As to whether the amp or car costs more, that’s up in the air until you get down to models, but the amp requires a lot less moolah to operate.

  34. 34
    John O says:

    Totally get it, John Cole. I’ve been considering replacing the contractor-grade, crappy windows on my 20 year old townhouse for a good 2 years, and I’m finally ready to pull the trigger. It’s always a long and thorough process for me, too.

    I’m finally tired enough of watching my shades blow around on windy days even with the windows closed to do something about it. Expensive proposition, however.

  35. 35
    dp says:

    Dude, I’ve got Adcoms too! Been really happy with them for 20+ years, though they’ve taken a backseat to the HT setup.

  36. 36
    The Dangerman says:

    @John O:

    …crappy windows…

    Just finished putting new Milgard on all opening windows in the house; easy installation, fine quality, damn glad it’s over.

    ETA: …though I don’t I run around the house opening the windows for no reason. Maybe it’s an Appalachian thing.

  37. 37
  38. 38
    John O says:

    @The Dangerman:

    How long ago did you do it? Seems like the quality is an unknown quantity until a few years go by, at least.

    Everyone’s offering a “lifetime guarantee” but I haven’t actually read any of them yet.

  39. 39
    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN) says:

    @🍀 Martin: As much as I dislike Ron Johnson I’m having a hard time seeing any malfeasance on his part in this issue. He didn’t inform anyone about the assault because the victim requested that he not do so. That seems reasonable. Kramer should be hung out to dry, though.

  40. 40
    The Dangerman says:

    @John O:

    How long ago did you do it?

    Started about 2 years ago (the process for the last windows was ugly). So far, so good; I was too lazy to read the warranty as I figure the house gets flipped before I will ever care.

  41. 41
    Mnemosyne says:


    Given your location, this is probably a good time to pick up a bike for cheap — you can almost always find a decent used one in a college town. Even a one-speed cruiser would give you a little more distance and speed.

  42. 42
    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN) says:

    And the Maple Loafs are eliminated from the playoffs. 1967, baby!

  43. 43
    catclub says:

    @John O: On the other hand, my parents had some Andersen windows fog up between the two layers of glass, and got them replaced under warranty about 19 years after installation.

  44. 44
    CaseyL says:

    @ruemara: @Mnemosyne:

    Nah: scooter!

    The only lesson I’ve learned from car buying is: never deal with a dealer. Buy from an individual, take the car to a mechanic for a check-up, and then grab it if it’s good.

    (That doesn’t work for new cars, but I can’t see ever buying a new car. Damn fool waste of money.)

  45. 45
    piratedan says:

    open thread comment du juor….caretaking a process on site, working away from home. Miss my wife, miss my cats and dogs and yes, even my teenager. Web access is restricted but not from here strangely enough. Happy for small benefits like this one, being able to share ideas, snark and little victories with this community. TY all for being here and being who you are in all of your myriad compositions. You folks really help me out quite a bit by raising the bar for political and social discourse (mostly). OK, now we can get back to the topics at hand, Republican duplicity, Conservative depravity, cat and dog pics and why our bloghost is still a must read even if you don’t agree with him.

  46. 46
    The Dangerman says:

    @John O:

    A few words of wisdom; when you measure your frames after removing the old ones, allow for a fudge factor depending on how old the house is. I live in earthquake country and the house is old and the glass person took off the commonly used FF and it was damn near not enough at times (I don’t think I found a frame that was close to square). Caulking is easier than a press fit ;-)

  47. 47
    max says:

    @ruemara: I wound up with a $1060 bill for: new starter, new battery (installer damaged the innard wires), brake hydraulic hoses needing replacement and serpentine belt is cracking.

    For an ’87 Cavalier. WOW. Did they ever rob you blind.

    Fuckin’ A. And also Jesus H. Christ, stock broker at Goldman-Sachs.

    OK, so the battery is say, a 100$, the starter is about 50, the serpentine belt is 20 (25 if you want the dayco), and a hydraulic hose is almost 10$. So say 40$ if they do the hoses all the way around, plus 8$ if you want the clips. So 225 worth of parts (assuming you needed the parts) and 835$ worth of labor.

    Man. If they were gonna fuck you like that they could thrown in a new alternator as bonus.

    [‘Figure it took maybe 4-5 hours with a lift, so all it eight. So he billed you at 104$ an hour. Well. Guess he had a boat payment coming up.’]

  48. 48
    Bob S says:

    Dunno about your town, but in Champaign, IL the Subaru dealer puts vaguely bleeding-heart bumper stickers on cars in the showroom (ASPCA, Teach for America, etc). They know their demo.

    Sweet-looking car.

  49. 49
    Bill E Pilgrim says:

    I don’t know, it was sort of comforting to come here and count on seeing John saying “Still shopping for a car” over the months or years or whatever it’s been since the holy planting of the permanent Subaru Scarecrow, may it rust in place. Having you actually buy one is sort of like the dog finally catching the car: something that’s not supposed to ever happen, despite being the driving force behind everything.

    Case in point, writing about driving around a lot? Just not the same, sorry.

    Wait, what are those oblong lozenges above me? Guess it’s been a while.

  50. 50
    srv says:

    @trollhattan: I participated in a runoff that included a SA-102 once, and it came in second. But even if I could afford it, I couldn’t lift it. And it’s just a wee bit overkill for a desktop system.

    I see Adcom appears to be made overseas now, whereas Rogue is still USofA.

  51. 51
    Mandalay says:

    Here’s a story for our media to put in the background while we fixate on the latest stupid and unimportant thing that some politician said or did…

    A man who spent almost a quarter-century behind bars for murder was freed Tuesday and cleared of a killing that happened when he was 1,100 miles away on a Disney World vacation.

    Jonathan Fleming was in tears as he hugged his lawyers and family in a Brooklyn courtroom. Relatives said, “Thank you God!” after he was freed.

    “After 25 years, come hug your mother,” she said. And he did.

    Defense attorneys and prosecutors asked a Brooklyn judge to dismiss Fleming’s conviction in the 1989 shooting. A key eyewitness recanted, new witnesses have implicated someone else, and a review by prosecutors turned up a hotel receipt putting Fleming in Florida hours before the killing, defense lawyers Anthony Mayol and Taylor Koss said.

    25 years of his life wasted because of our corrupt system of justice.

  52. 52
    Bill E Pilgrim says:

    It is important to have a pre-amp, it’s true. Otherwise when you get a new stereo the old one can take you for everything you’re worth.

  53. 53
    Violet says:

    Did John ever get the Original Subaru out of the field?

  54. 54
    srv says:

    @Violet: The locals wanted to make an art piece of it, but the EPA came in and declared it habitat for feral cats.

  55. 55
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @🍀 Martin:

    Thank you Ron Johnson and Bill Kramer for breaking our streak of Democratic malfeasance.

    What have I missed?

  56. 56
    Violet says:

    Anyone know anything about this Heartbleed security hole in TLS/SSL? Sounds like it could be serious and untraceable as to who’s been affected. Yet more “change your password” warnings.

  57. 57
    ruemara says:

    People. I can’t ride a bike.

    and it’s the whole brake hydraulic system that needs new hoses. Mind you, I know I’m getting hosed due to lack of skills on my part, but these guys have a stellar reputation for quality. Baby needs to last another year and be safe for freeway travel.

  58. 58
    Omnes Omnibus says:


    and it’s the whole brake hydraulic system that needs new hoses. Mind you, I know I’m getting hosed due to lack of skills on my part, but these guys have a stellar reputation for quality. Baby needs to last another year and be safe for freeway travel.

    Sometimes a bunch of repairs like you are doing keep a car going for a long, long time.

  59. 59
    YellowJournalism says:

    The only reason I gave you shit is because you remind me of myself, and I’m annoying when it comes to big purchases. I have to look at all the angles.

    OT, but I’m sending out a warning to all the ladies with pets who have old purses sitting in a closet or mud room. I didn’t want to say anything until I knew she was in the clear, but my pup got into an old purse this weekend and happened to fish out some Advil I forgot to take out before switching to a new purse. She was in the vet hospital all weekend on IV’s and having her stomach and kidneys watched for damage. At one point she developed a heart murmer, but thankfully it was a complication of the stress from having the IV and not something permanent requiring surgery. She’s home now and on meds to keep her tummy safe. I’m just thankful she seems to have ingested much less than we originally thought. I felt horrible and lost most of the time she was gone. Thank God for the wonderful emergency vet staff and doctors who kept her healthy and made sure my family was comfortable when visiting her all weekend. They even put up with my blubberin and constant questions. People thought I was nuts all weekend, but I think you guys would get what state I was in at the time. We got the final all-clear blood test today after her being home for a night. Relieved but still watchful of the signs of damage.

    So, basically, make sure there aren’t old meds left behind in old purses, bags, or suitcases where your pet can unexpectedly get into…and does anyone have suggestions for a thank you to send the hospital staff? Definitely don’t want to send chocolates or flowers that could be harmful.

  60. 60
    RoonieRoo says:

    We’;ve had our new Subaru Forester for 3 weeks now and I’m falling in love with it more every time I drive it. I’ve loved my Mazdas and Nissans in the past but I get the Subaru loyalty now. We buy new and then drive them until the repair bills hit the magic number for their value. This Subaru is replacing the 1996 Ford Ranger that was bought new and is finally ready to be retired.

    But I believe we are official Subaru only converts if these first 3 weeks are any indication.

  61. 61
    Mike E says:

    Heh, Jimmy Fallon just aired the Fox News clip, “UCONN Huskies are this year’s NAACP Nat’l Champs!” ?uestlove’s expression was hilarious, and Fallon’s punchline, “This is why we have an NAACP.”

  62. 62
    Violet says:

    @YellowJournalism: Glad your pup is okay! Maybe send a fruit basket or fruit bouquet? Or if you know someone who does massage, coordinate with them and have them take their massage chair over and give the staff chair massages. I have a relative who’s a massage therapist and she does that for someone group she’s involved with–the teachers at her kid’s school or the church staff or something. It’s her holiday gift every year and apparently a big hit.

  63. 63
    🍀 Martin says:

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    That seems reasonable.

    But he didn’t need to sit by and allow Kramer rise in the ranks. He could have stopped that without breaking his word to the victim. It’s a relatively small thing, and it doesn’t really get him in trouble, but it perpetuates the old-boy-network of politics at a time when the GOP needs to be recruiting women. It hurts in their efforts to change that narrative because it at least gives the appearance (and I think an argument will be made that it was more than appearance) that Johnson was helping Kramer avoid any consequence for his sexual assault.

  64. 64
    piratedan says:

    @Violet: thread on it over at LGF, very bad mojo implications… think having to change your passwords to a whole lotta places you visit on the web kind of bad

  65. 65
    piratedan says:

    here’s the thread in question….

  66. 66
    🍀 Martin says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Keller is the assembly majority leader. There’s 3 different sexual assault accusations against him, two of which have now resulted in felony charges. Johnson was a witness in one of the cases from 2011, as we learn from a poorly redacted police report. The pivotal case against Keller (the 2nd of 3, chronologically) was held back by the victim on the promise that Keller wouldn’t ever do it again, but he did, and she pushed the case through. Since that second incident which Johnson was a witness, Keller was elected to majority leader. Johnson could have discouraged Keller or worked against that nomination without necessarily blowing the whistle on him.

    The 3rd incident which happened in Feb cause the woman from the 2011 incident to press charges, as is the woman from this most recent incident. I appreciate Johnson was keeping his word to the 2011 victim, but I wonder if the most recent victim will see it that way, or pretty much every other woman in America, because an opportunity to prevent a future assault was missed.

  67. 67
    cckids says:

    @YellowJournalism: A gift card to a place they could order in a nice lunch or breakfast is usually appreciated. Or a donation to an animal rescue org of their choice might be more their style.

    A heartfelt thank-you card/letter would mean a lot, I’m sure.

  68. 68
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @🍀 Martin: Okay. I knew about the charges against Kramer. I was not aware of the Johnson connection. I think you are right that it, in and of itself, won’t bring him down, but it is another arrow in the quiver and another reason that Johnson is an embarrassment to my state. I go back and forth on who is worse, Walker or Johnson.

  69. 69
    something fabulous says:

    @YellowJournalism: Great public service announcement, thanks! Something I’d never have thought of! For thanks, I wonder about some kind of cash or gift certificate to taking care of the animals who are often left/abandoned at a vet’s office? Share it forward?

  70. 70
    Jackie says:

    You remind me of my kids when they first got their license! At 17 LOL! Oh, mom, do you need butter? I’ll go to the store! Oh, mom, do you need bread? I’ll drive to the store! Do you need me to gas the car? I’ll go!

    Good times ;) ANY EXCUSE to get behind the wheel and drive to “anywhere.” Enjoy your new ride!


  71. 71
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Jackie: As someone who loves driving, it is interesting to see what is happening to Cole – someone who professed being a purely pragmatic driver. A really good and responsive machine makes a difference.

  72. 72
    ruemara says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: last repair job was 600 and over 2 years ago. I got this car for free, saved from being turned over for scrap. in 8 years, she’s cost me a lot of frustration, terror and about 5k in repairs. But she’s also saved my butt, earned my salary, allowed me to cart groceries and water home easily, allowed me to pick up friends from the bay who visit, let me fill the car with donations for the shelter, the pound and the library and tolerated being covered with giant glitter skulls and anti-prop 8 signage. All hail Deeba. I’ll pay for great mechanical work that lasts.

  73. 73
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @ruemara: Glitter skulls? Or should I just have enough sense to walk on?

    ETA: I resole any pair of shoes that can be redone. I have sunglasses older than some commenters here (I may have a sunglasses problem, but that is a different story).

  74. 74
    Chris T. says:

    You know a car is really something when several years later you are still looking for excuses to drive it… :-)

  75. 75
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Chris T.: Yesssss. I feel that way about my car. I also look back in parking lots to make sure she is safe. The emotional investment is there.

  76. 76
    Paul in KY says:

    Did you ever get the previous Subaru out of that farmer’s field?

  77. 77
    boatboy_srq says:

    @TaMara (BHF): @Chris T.: Ditto.

    My last car purchase took six months – of which about 30 minutes was sorting out what I wanted and the rest was finding it at a good price. Five years and 90K miles later I’m still really happy.

    ADVICE TO ANYONE DOING CAR SHOPPING: the worst way to start the process is by talking to your insurance agent. I had three dream cars absolutely nixed by the rates I got quoted.

  78. 78
    kindness says:

    Adcom is good stuff but c’mon now John. You live less than 100 miles from Binghamton NY. You should own McIntosh. Me? No, I don’t own any. I have a bunch of different stuff, Anthem, ATI, Pro-ject, Arcam, Oppo, Dual. Yea I still have my turntable from the 80’s.

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