I’m just deleting this whole fucking post because I am a total moron. Discuss.

Now I am wired on coffee for a lunar event that happened several months ago. Fucking awesome.

43 replies
  1. 1
    joel hanes says:


    Isn’t today an equinox, not a solstice ?

    I would think “longest darkest” would be a new moon on the winter solstice.

  2. 2
    Emerald says:

    Not only only that, it was in December of 2010.

  3. 3
    Dave says:

    I think someone has mixed up equinox and solstice. The vernal and autumnal equinoxes are when the day and night are of equal length, and mark the beginning of Spring and Fall, respectively. The summer and winter solstices mark the beginning of summer and fall, and are the longest day and night, respectively. Not sure where you got the quote, but it seems to be in error.

  4. 4
    Not Adding Much To The Community says:

    You’re adorable, John Cole.

  5. 5
    Karmus says:

    Revisionist! Someone post the screen cap, plskthx

  6. 6
    joel hanes says:

    John, “total morons” aren’t aware that they’re making mistakes.

    “Total assholes” cannot admit they’ve made mistakes.

    You’re decent folk.

  7. 7
    The Dangerman says:

    That IS pretty cool (I thought the answer was going to be Donald Trump without his combover, so I was way off).

    ETA: Well, hell, I wasn’t quick enough to get my Fixx, um, fix.

  8. 8
    Aleta says:

    I think you can still watch the sky tonight and say that it is something no one has ever seen before.

  9. 9
    YellowJournalism says:

    This is how I feel when I trip over my own feet, accidentally retweet myself on Twitter, or butt-dial someone with my phone. “Don’t mind me! Just a dumbass!”

  10. 10
    🍀 Martin says:

    Too bad you didn’t come to the same conclusion for every post < Oct 9, 2007.

  11. 11

    Well, Happy Nowruz for those who are celebrating…

  12. 12
    Alison says:

    It’s okay JC, you’ll always be smarter than Limbaugh.

  13. 13
    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason says:

    And might I add, based on the last one I’m going to pay special attention to Cole’s posts tagged “OLD MAN SHAKES FIST AT CLOUDS” I’m there with ya, buddy.

  14. 14
    Karmus says:

    I think, next solstice, and maybe every solstice, Balloon Juice should have an Equinox Party and Get-Together, just to commemorate this event (and to confuse everyone).

  15. 15
    NotMax says:

    Thought perhaps the deletion referred to the stellar occultation, but that was the night previous.

  16. 16
    max says:

    Now I am wired on coffee for a lunar event that happened several months ago.

    There’s a total lunar eclipse coming up on April 15th.

    [‘So you’re just a month early. Right on the hour though.’]

  17. 17
    Felonius Monk says:

    Doesn’t matter, John. According to the wingers, Obama has surrendered the Internet — we are all toast now.

  18. 18
    Fred Fnord says:

    This is the funniest thing I’ve read in a week.

    Quick, could somebody point me toward some funny stuff to read?

  19. 19
    J.Ty says:

    @Fred Fnord:
    (Groucho of the famous brothers, FYWP)

    Barely scraping the bottom of the century barrel.

  20. 20
    Steeplejack says:


    Never a bad idea to sit outside and look at the stars.

  21. 21
    Amir Khalid says:

    The website for the TGV cinema chain is down. Now I can’t see what’s playing at my local cineplex. Pout.

  22. 22
  23. 23
    joel hanes says:

    @Fred Fnord:

    Quick, could somebody point me toward some funny stuff to read?

    How Shall I Word It by Max Beerbohm is good in a pinch. If the intro seems stilted, skip forward to the example letters …

  24. 24
    wrye says:

    Oh, I saw a link to an article about that event (I’m sure it’s the same thing you’re referring to) a couple days ago and thought, oh, neat! And then, wait a minute…and noticed the date. So this could happen to anyone! But I wonder why it bobbed back up to the surface of the internet just now?

  25. 25
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @joel hanes:


  26. 26
    Schlemizel says:

    Just cuz I wanna be pedantic
    John, you USED to be a moran but are not one now. You can be a moron if you so desire but some may disagree with the assessment.
    A moran hangs Lipton bags from their hat, knows that “English is are language” that Obama has not read the cositution that we must keep the government out of our medicare and a small increase in the marginal tax rates of billionaires is socalism.

    Thank you – the society for keeping the language pure

  27. 27

    Was this your audtion piece to replace Steve Doocy?

  28. 28
    Woodrowfan says:

    hummm, this may explain the whole “Subaru in the field” thing…

  29. 29
    PaulW says:

    I just wanna be loved, is that so wrong?

  30. 30
    big ole hound says:

    One of the odd facts about equinoxes is that the sun rises exactly due East and sets due West and the day is twelve hours long.

  31. 31
    J R in WV says:

    @big ole hound:

    This depends upon where on the earth;’s surface you are, I think.

    JOHN: Noting wrong with making a mistake and admitting it. The problems arise when you find yourself compelled to deny making the mistake. So just hang in there!

  32. 32
    Citizen_X says:

    @Karmus: Could we please, henceforth, refer to March 21st as the Solquinox or something?

  33. 33
    Joey Giraud says:

    @J R in WV:

    No, the hound is right on this one. Exactly due-East and West, 12 hours of sunlight, everywhere on earth ( excepting the poles where the sun will float almost exactly on the horizon all around you, a half-light day. )

    if you’re far enough from one of the poles for the sun to dive under or pop up from the horizon, it will do so at the location corresponding to due East or West for that latitude.

    It’s simple geometry

  34. 34
    Joey Giraud says:

    JC, getting some facts wrong isn’t the mark of a moron.

  35. 35
    delosgatos says:

    @J R in WV:
    Picture the Earth’s axis lying in a plane that is orthogonal to the line between the centers of the Earth and Sun.

  36. 36
    Avery Greynold says:

    A couple nights ago I stepped outside to search for a total lunar eclipse in progress. Thanks John, we are. But now I feel better about it.

  37. 37
    allium says:

    If this is about a lunar eclipse, I saw what sounds like the same 4 year old article pop up on io9 – but it turns out there IS one coming next month that will be visible over most of the Western Hemisphere. My guess is that some article-forwarding algorithm got the two eclipses confused.

  38. 38
    Lurker says:


    If I understand you correctly, today being the first day of spring, night and day should be of equal length, right?

  39. 39
    Downpuppy says:

    @Lurker: We have sunrise at 6:45 & sunset at 18:57. Sun’s not a point, etc.

    Martin’s post sent me To the Archives! 3/24/2006 – the storm. Little astronomical mixup? Pfft.

  40. 40
    Spinoza Is My Co-pilot says:

    Hey, umm…

    The vernal equinox was yesterday (March 20th). It has been on that date for some time now, going back before my best friend and I got married on that day in ’78 (and we’re still going strong!).

    That’s why we picked March 20th, being young romantic types at the time and looking for something notable and “bigger than us” to mark the date of our wedding since we were (are) non-religious.

    And John Cole — not a moron — remains my favorite blogger, as he’s been since his “road to Damascus” thing in ’05.

  41. 41
  42. 42
    mclaren says:

    “My advice to you is to start drinking heavily.” — Bluto, Animal House, 1978

  43. 43
    centerfielddj says:


    Well, no, he shouldn’t do that.

    One day at a time, John. Thanks for doing everything you do for us here. Take it easy, Brother.

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