Newsmax So Funny

Yes, one of our main worries is the extensive program of conservative outreach to young blacks (especially young black men), which has been perfected during the Obama presidency. That worry is barely eclipsed by our concern over Latino outreach. If the last few years have shown anything, it’s the ability of conservatives to appeal to a young, diverse audience.

64 replies
  1. 1
    c u n d gulag says:

    I’m waiting for the next Republican outreach attempts to minority youths:

    “Stand Your Hood!”
    Or, “Stand Your Ghetto!”

    But only, of course, against other minority members.

  2. 2
    Mr Longform says:

    Next Headline from Tim Scott: Atheists Fear Creation Museum Will Convince A Lot of Scientists to Be Stupid

  3. 3
    Barry says:

    That link doesn’t work.

  4. 4
    ET says:

    WTF? With the Republican party looking and acting like they do right now? I think not.

  5. 5
    rikyrah says:

    I realized this morning that I bought my Eskimo coat 6 years ago, and I have worn it more this winter than the previous six winters COMBINED.

    This is ridiculous.

    Puxatawney Phil needs to be put in a stew.

  6. 6
    EconWatcher says:

    The only liberal issues I can think of that have provoked significant dissent in the AA community are abortion and gay rights, and at least the latter is fading as an issue for pretty much everybody except some hardcore (probably mostly white) fundies. Are there are any others I’m missing?

  7. 7
    RSR says:

    Outreach: Former [Philadelphia] Eagle G. Cobb ‘leaning’ toward [GOP] run for Congress

    When Camden County Republican Chairman Thomas Booth told me Wednesday the party had found its candidate for the congressional seat being vacated by Democrat Rob Andrews, I think he might have been on the wrong snap count.

    I use the lame football joke here because the candidate Booth told me about was former Philadelphia Eagles linebacker Garry Cobb, who’s made a name for himself as a sports-talk radio personality.

    Booth encouraged me to call Cobb, but the call was returned by Pat Breslin, a friend and co-author with Cobb of the self-help book “Don’t Be Clueless.” Breslin said the man known to fans as G. Cobb is “strongly leaning” toward running, but not quite ready to announce anything.

    “There’s a couple more people he wants to connect with,” Breslin said. “He’s looking at everything from, you know, can he get enough support? Obviously in running for this type of office, resources, financial support is a huge thing.”

    Breslin said Cobb expects to decide in a week or two.

    New Jersey’s 1st Congressional District will be an uphill climb for any Republican. The respected Cook Political Report rates the district as a “D – plus 13,” meaning that it performs 13 percent better for Democrats than Republicans. That’s landslide territory.

    The Democrats’ consensus candidate for the seat is state Sen. Donald Norcross.

    Breslin said Cobb, who has a degree in sociology from the University of Southern California, is “passionately interested” in some issues, including the importance of limited government and personal responsibility.

    Breslin said Cobb began thinking about running as far back as Thanksgiving. He had his eye then on the 3rd Congressional District seat, which another former Eagle, Jon Runyan, was vacating after two terms in office.

    When Andrews announced his departure, Cobb, who lives in Cherry Hill, refocused on that seat.

  8. 8
    dpm (dread pirate mistermix) says:

    @Barry: Works for me:

    If you mean the Newsmax link, do you think I’m going to link to Newsmax? C’mon.

  9. 9
    Baud says:

    I don’t lay awake worrying about it, but no one’s support is assured. And no group of people is about being stupid, although, judging by voting habits, blacks (or “the blacks” as Scalia would say) seem to understand better than most which party really, really hates them.

  10. 10
    geg6 says:

    Oh yeah. Every young black person I know, especially the young black men, are enthralled by the GOP outreach that they’ve experienced during the reign of terror of the Kenyan Muslim sockalist fascist usurper.

  11. 11
    dmsilev says:

    @Barry: If you really really want to read the NewsMax story, it’s still in the ad sidebar.

  12. 12
    Ash Can says:

    Who is Tim Scott, and why is he being used by news organizations to showcase the voices in his head like a carnival freak, instead of being kept safe at home and being treated for his affliction?

  13. 13
    Baud says:

    @Ash Can:

    Senator from South Carolina. Only black senator until Boo ker was elected. Appointed, not elected.

  14. 14
    rikyrah says:

    from the WHAT THE FUCK files:

    “Democrats are known as having great policies (for minorities) on paper, but it’s harder to rise through the ranks,” said Andra Gillespie, an associate professor of political science at Emory University. “The Republicans don’t have great policies on paper, but they are often more supportive of their minority candidates.” more here:

  15. 15
    Anya says:

    It’s funny considering that all the “black conservatives” are either insane or dumb. They have no ability whatsoever to atract black youth. They’re always saying outrageously insane shit and all of their insanity is directed at denigrating the first black president. Yes, that’s the ticket for attracting black votes.

  16. 16
    Ash Can says:

    @rikyrah: That must be why there are so many non-white Republican politicians, and so few Democratic ones. Oh, wait…

  17. 17
    Baud says:


    I meant “no group of people is ABOVE being stupid….”

  18. 18
    sparrow says:

    @rikyrah: Yes, and that explains why the republican congress is 90% white male while the dems are 50% non-white/non-male. Right.

  19. 19
    dmsilev says:

    @rikyrah: Years and years ago, Art Buchwald did a column about why it made sense for black people to be conservative: Because black conservatives were vanishingly rare, any example of such was immediately lauded and feted by the rest of the conservative movement, regardless of how talented the person in question might be. Whereas in the Democratic Party, you’d actually have to be good at something to be noticed.

    La plus ca change…

  20. 20
    Ash Can says:


    not elected

    And probably won’t ever be.

    (And thanks.)

  21. 21
    rikyrah says:

    Since the CBC has nobody on their staff that can do statistics, The Obama Diary breaks it down about President Obama and his Judicial Nominees:

    Here are the percentages of nominees:


    Obama 42%
    Bush 22%
    Clinton 29%

    Minority Women Judges?

    Obama 16%
    Bush 6.4%
    Clinton 6.1%


    Obama 19%
    Bush 8%
    Clinton 16%


    Obama 12%
    Bush 9%
    Clinton 7%

    President Obama has already appointed more Hispanic Judges than in Clintons ENTIRE 8 YEARS.

    Obama 7%
    Bush 1%
    Clinton 1%

  22. 22
    Cacti says:

    I’m sure young black people were duly impressed with how Fox News made Trayvon Martin’s murderer the mascot of their network.

  23. 23
    rikyrah says:

    ‘The 1 percent work harder’
    02/06/14 04:25 PM
    By Steve Benen

    Venture capitalist Tom Perkins recently caused a stir when he wrote an item comparing contemporary liberals to Nazis, insisting liberal criticism of the wealthiest 1% has “parallels” to Nazi genocide. He later apologized for having used the word “Kristallnacht,” but defended his message.

    The story ran its course and faded away, right up until yesterday, when billionaire Sam Zell, chairman of Equity Group Investments, decided to defend Perkins in a Bloomberg TV interview.

    “I guess my feeling is that he’s right,” Zell said when asked by Bloomberg’s Betty Liu how he felt about Perkins’ stance. “The 1 percent are being pummeled because it’s politically convenient to do so.”

    Zell then said the problem is that all non-rich are just jealous that they don’t have the same work ethic that the country’s wealthiest do.

    “The problem is that the world and this country should not talk about envy of the 1 percent. It should talk about emulating the 1 percent,” he said. “The 1 percent work harder. The 1 percent are much bigger factors in all forms of our society.”

    Oh dear.

  24. 24
    cintibud says:

    @dmsilev: Art Buchwald was dead on. If you are Black, intelligent and personable and willing to mouth GOP platitudes you will find an affirmative action seat in the first class section on the wingnut welfare train.

    Heck Michael Steel may have had only 2 of the above qualifications and he did quite well for himself.

  25. 25
    Cacti says:


    Yep, the 1-percent just work harder.

    30 percent of the Forbes 400 pulled themselves up by the bootstraps and inherited their money.

  26. 26
    Baud says:


    Hey, it’s hard work coming out of the right womb.

  27. 27
    Ash Can says:


    “The 1 percent work harder.”

    Yeah, the folks who are working 2 and 3 jobs to barely make ends meet are just cruising through life.

  28. 28
    Chyron HR says:


    No, no, George Zimmerman is a Democratic Obamist. I read it on the internet, so it must be true.

  29. 29
    gene108 says:


    Does Ms. Gillespie know who the current President is?

    Clearly minorities are kept down in the Democratic Party. / eye-roll

  30. 30

    Yeah, just like we were so scared of Sarah Palin’s candidacy. LOL.

    Hey everyone, it’s Good News Friday.

  31. 31
    Cacti says:


    Art Buchwald was dead on. If you are Black, intelligent and personable and willing to mouth GOP platitudes you will find an affirmative action seat in the first class section on the wingnut welfare train

    If you’re a person of color willing to trash people of color for a white audience, you will always have a place in the right wing of American politics, but there is a definite glass ceiling. You won’t be nominated for POTUS or VPOTUS, so forget about that.

    But if you’re okay with that, you can make a lucrative career as the brown or black face cheerleading and guard dogging the white supremacist agenda.

  32. 32
    danielx says:

    Because the Republicans’ policy of outreach towards minorities has been so outstandingly effective to date. When a prominent Republican actually blurts out “We’re not generating enough angry white guys to stay in business for the long term.”, you know they’re screwed, long term.

    The problem is the amount of damage they cause in the short term.

  33. 33
    Cacti says:


    The problem is the amount of damage they cause in the short term.

    The problem with their “outreach” efforts is they can’t talk to blacks, browns, or wimmins without being insulting or condescending with their first sentence.

    Usually it goes something like: “You people would be natural conservatives if you’d just (fill in with: get off the liberal plantation, stop demanding welfare handouts, etc.)”.

    Then they wonder where they went wrong.

  34. 34
    gene108 says:


    I guess that’s one “good” reason to oppose birth-control…not enough angry white guys getting born to sustain your politics…

  35. 35
    Amir Khalid says:

    The Washington Post reports Taliban forces have captured a US Army dog. Per The Post, the Taliban are claiming the dog is a Colonel; but from what I know colonels don’t go out on patrol, so this strikes me as unlikely.

  36. 36
    Jay C says:

    @Anya: @dmsilev:

    But you can’t say they don’t try: I recently saw an ad on TV (sponsored by some lengthily-disclaimered PAC) featuring Dr. Ben Carson rambling on about the “horrorshow” that is Obamacare – no real alternatives presented AFAICT, just a generalized rag – presumably, RWers are (just) cognizant enough to try to put the occasional non-white face in front of the public to try to rid the “conservative” tag of its white-supremacy malodor. Doesn’t seem to be working, though…

  37. 37
    rikyrah says:


    If you’re a person of color willing to trash people of color for a white audience, you will always have a place in the right wing of American politics, but there is a definite glass ceiling.

    Yes yes yes

    If you are willing to denigrate and disrespect Black people for a White audience, you will definitely get paid.

    So, collect your check, and receive your contempt from the Black community like a man….no whining.

  38. 38
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Amir Khalid: I read that somewhere, and that article (from where I don’t know, so I can’t vouch for trustworthiness) says that military dogs outrank their handlers for some reason. Maybe to be funny?

    At any rate, if they know what’s good for them, those motherfuckers better not hurt that dog. In America, a lunatic can gun down a classroom of first graders, and no policy will change as a result. But hurt an animal — despite the fact that tens of thousands of unwanted pets are euthanized every year — and the righteous rage of hell will rain down on your head. Just ask Michael Vick.

  39. 39
    Jay C says:

    @Amir Khalid:

    The Washington Post reports Taliban forces have captured a US Army dog. Per The Post, the Taliban are claiming the dog is a Colonel

    So: how long did he have to serve to get promoted to such a high rank? And was it in human years or dog years?
    Obviously a situation stemming from political-correctness and affirmative-action promotion run rampant in the military: back in the day, most Army dogs rarely made it past NCO rank….

  40. 40
    Shazza says:

    That’s why I’ve said all along that if President Obama were a Republican-they’d erect a statue in his honor! I mean, talk about someone lifting himself up by his bootstraps! He’s everything they claim to be about (I’m sure they’d promote his being biracial).

  41. 41
    Shortstop says:

    @Cacti: Allen West, Tim Scott, Herman Cain, Ben Carson, etc., etc. Their sole base is white people who are firmly racist but uncomfortable or offended to be called such. They daily validate this group’s anti-black feeling while providing a handy line: “How can you call me a racist when I support X?”

    They will never want for work.

  42. 42

    This makes me happy. The wealthy’s outreach to the 99% is becoming as insultingly tone deaf as the racist’s outreach to minorities. While I admire Obama for the speeches he made opening up the topic (before Occupy), I think Romney’s 47% speech was as powerful as every other public commenter combined in convincing America that shit needs to change.

  43. 43
    Shakezula says:

    Oh yes, I am just sick with worry that the GOP will charm young African-American voters with some cleverly devised scheme involving fried chicken and a few well placed Yo, whut ups. Of course, the GOP is hard at work making sure African-Americans can’t vote at all so I’m not sure why they’d bother. Must be some clever stratergery my dumb blah brain can’t figure out.

  44. 44
    Tone In DC says:


    These wingers will have lots of luck with that, no doubt. Just look at MC Rove and Mitch McTurtle from 2009 with that one term president remark.

  45. 45
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @EconWatcher: When I was canvassing voters over Florida ballot measures in 2012, which included attempts at abortion restrictions, I did not run into issues over abortion with African-Americans, including males, including church-goers.

    White church-goers push these issues because in the back of their mind they assume they will always be able to ‘take care of’ their abortion.

  46. 46
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @Ash Can: He’s the latest cat’s paw of the SC GOP.

    There are quite a few Black wingers looking for wingnut welfare in the “I’m a serious Black conservative” racket. Looking to join crazeee eyes Star Jones Parker and Thomas Sowell’s Dispatches from La-La Land.

    There was one guy who used to get featured on Sadly, No. A Townhall columnist. Sadly, don’t think he had what it takes to really hit the big time.

    Joshua Black clearly has Tim Scott/Allen West envy but burned out too soon. Bummer!

    eta: Oops

  47. 47
    Paul Gottlieb says:

    I think appointing George Zimmerman head of minority outreach was a masterstroke

  48. 48
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Shakezula: So you are implying that this doesn’t work?

  49. 49
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @dmsilev: applies to self-hating Jews and gays as well

  50. 50
    Another Holocene Human says:

    @cintibud: To be fair, Michael Steele was and is genuinely a scion of the upper class and socially moderate. The RNC tossed him out on his ass just like they turfed richboy social liberal* William Weld 15 years ago.

    What those assholes really want is a Herman Cain, minus the icky had-consensual-sex-with-a-white-lady baggage.

    *social, as in glbt issues, where he was a groundbreaker, hence the turfing, not economic, where he privatized and union busted all day long

  51. 51
    shortstop says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: I know it’s hilarious, but it also causes me actual physical pain to watch that. Every time.

  52. 52
    catclub says:

    @rikyrah: “Asian” The Hawaii influence. Very worldview expanding place.

  53. 53
    elmo says:

    @Another Holocene Human:

    There was one guy who used to get featured on Sadly, No. A Townhall columnist.

    I think you mean Walter Williams.

  54. 54
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @shortstop: It is a sacrifice for the greater good. Thank you for your service.

  55. 55
    gwangung says:

    @catclub: Actually, more likely family influence. Sister’s Indonesian, remember.

  56. 56
    Shakezula says:

    @Tone In DC: Mitt “Who let the dogs out [of the carrier on the roof]” is a big hit as well.

  57. 57
    catclub says:

    @gwangung: Yeah, both.

  58. 58
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Shakezula: Well, I know many African Americans who subscribe to the National Review just for its insightful reviews of the latest hip-hop trends.

  59. 59
    Shakezula says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Sorry, I didn’t see your reply. Great minds?

    But, yeah. And it says something that being close contact with African-Americans made Rmoney look more robotic and unnatural.

  60. 60
    Ian says:

    I know quite a few African Americans who are pretty conservative. The problem for Republicans isn’t a lack of conservative AAs, it is their own southern strategy. Do they really think that minorities will vote for candidates that caucus with Dick Shelby and Jefferson Baueregaurd Sessions III? Whose former senate leader called Strom Thurmond a hero and said the country would be better if he had been president?
    It isn’t a lack of ideological overlap, it is a lack of recognition that the Republican political party allows racists to be in their leadership positions. And it also involves the assumption that AA voters somehow just will overlook that.

  61. 61
    Paul in KY says:

    @Baud: Some of them would really say it was damned hard work kissing ass to whatever asshole relative they had to to ensure they would still be in the will.

  62. 62
    Paul in KY says:

    @Amir Khalid: Think the poor dog may be named ‘Colonel’.

  63. 63
    shortstop says:

    @Suffern ACE: That made me laugh extremely hard. Thanks!

  64. 64
    shortstop says:

    @Shakezula: I can’t remember who said it, but someone here just cracked me up after the incident in question. Y’all will recall that the IIQ was just one (though inarguably the most stilted and painful) of a string of racial/ethnic meet-and-greets in which Romney would congratulate Italians on “their-a fast-a car-as,” tell Jewish people he has always loved bagels and borrowing money, etc. I’m making up these examples, but they’re not far off reality.

    Anyway, the BJ commenter said something like this: “I can’t wait to read the tell-all books from Romney campaign staffers down the line. ‘We tried to teach the candidate something substantive about the many ethnic, racial and religious groups in America, but it was just too hard for him. We decided to create a list of one memorable item about each of 25 groups he could use as a cheat sheet when talking to these demographics he’d never encountered in his life.'”

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