My sister and brother and Bill and everyone else left around 11:30- midnight, so I dutifully turned on the latest Psych episode On Demand (it’s all about Woody, so you know it is going to rock), and then promptly fell asleep about five minutes in.
Woke up to a continuous stream of horn honking and drunk people screaming while leaving the bar and heading to the local frat houses, so I clutched my walking stick, got out of my chair, hobbled slowly to the door, grabbed my big ass maglite next on the table with my power outage kit, opened the door, shined the light onto the front walk, and as I opened the door, before looking, bellowed “It’s 12:30, show some damned decency and shut up.”
And that is when my eyes focused and I saw that I had my flashlight beamed on some skinny black dude walking down the street by himself. quietly talking on the phone, minding his own business and not bothering anyone, and he stopped, looked at me, and calmly said “Yo, dude. You missed them. They’re down the street now.” I looked down the street, and sure enough, there was the crowd of revelers walking alongside an SUV, making a shitload of noise.
Don’t think I have ever felt dumber and sadder about my so-called existence than right now.