Trust me, this will (or should) win something.
*** Update ***
I’ve removed the damned video. Go to Comedy Central and find it your fucking selves. Autoplay was NOT on, you whiny gits. Check yourself and your browsers before you go all up into my shit, but I tried it on a pc and a mac in firefox/safari/chrome and it never autoplayed.
Sometimes the bullshit attitudes from you guys when the problem is fucking operator error pisses me off. 95% of these website problems are caused by the person you see looking in the mirror in the morning. I wondered what kind of asshole would bitch about the ACA site being slow when it was first released, when I should have known all along.
Fuck you. I’ve had a shitty two days.
DaveInOz
Saw it last night – it was awesome.
ranchandsyrup
Yeah it was great. Kind of had a Strangers With Candy/Colbert vibe to it.
Keith G
The Daily Show has been on fire since their post holiday return. Stewart’s interview of Richard Cordrey was the most insightful coverage of that topic that I have seen on any media.
WaterGirl
My laptop is in the shop, and all I see on my iPad is a big empty space. Link, please!
YellowJournalism
The woman was just saying what we’ve all been thinking.
monkeyfister
Samantha Bee is AWESOME!!!
Autoplay on the front page? Not so Awesome.
kindness
It was funny. A little long for a Stewart skit but fun.
mainmata
Samantha Bee has always been one of the edgier comediennes…er reporters on The Daily Show but, yes, last night’s was over the top great!
Trollhattan
Yeah, she killed it. Was trying to decide what weird early-’60s artifact she might have been drawing from. The Fantasticks?
It’s not often the interview guest references one of the bits when they come on.
jeffreyw
Please kill the auto play.
Kenn
Bookmark deleted due to autoplay.
Goodbye forever.
Joel
I fast forwarded through it, to be honest.
jheartney
BAD autoplay, BAD!
SiubhanDuinne
John, O/T, but if you’re still around: I don’t know whether you’ve seen this (about the chemical spill in WV), but righteous rant is righteously ranty.
http://aattp.org/a-west-virginian-shared-his-thoughts-on-the-chemical-spill-and-its-so-perfect-we-dont-want-to-change-a-thing/
A small sample:
Whole thing is well worth reading.
sparrow
@SiubhanDuinne: Good find. I agree with his sentiment RE: being from “backwards” places. I never met more parochial idiots with stupid things to say about where I was from than in “liberal” East-coast cities.
Wrye
Yes. John should read that. Hell, everybody who comes to this site should.
Trollhattan
@Kenn:
Reminds me of a Dan Hicks song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rW9-FOLG-iA
TheMightyTrowel
OT: Cats and dogs lying down together
Mike E
OT also: PBO opened up a manufacturing innovation institute right here in tobacco road, and with NC kicking everybody’s ass in solar energy growth I heartily approve of this.
burnspbesq
OT: common sense had a good day in court yesterday. The word “such” had an especially good day.
http://theincidentaleconomist.com/a-resounding-victory-for-the-administration-in-the-exchange-litigation/
The opinion is a master-class on statutory construction.
Amir Khalid
OT, sorry about that; but we’re between open threads.
There’s been a judge’s ruling in the lawsuit brought by Rahinah Ibrahim, the Malaysian university dean who sued to get off the no-fly list. The judge says Professor Rahinah has a right to know if she is still on the list, and to have corrected any mistaken information about her. “The government’s administrative remedies fall short of such relief and do not supply sufficient due process,” the judge wrote in his ruling. The judge also ordered authorities to tell Professor Rahinah more about the denial of her visa application.
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
We need to clean house and start over here. I remember when the comments used to be the big draw here. You fuckers have ruined everything.
kc
Ooohh, I love it when you scold us!
Astor Column
What show/performance piece/artist was Samantha paying homage to? I can well believe that ‘The Five’ is chock fulla upchuck-worthy coquetry and flirting between the manly Fox alpha-males and the blondalicious Foxettes… but I’m still not willing to actually watch it.
kc
@Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader:
Yeah, but that was when John was a wingnut. We don’t want him to backslide.
kindness
Can I say I really do like John’s relationship with his participants. And I am not joking. That whole love/hate thing. Talk about funny.
@Trollhattan: I was hoping it was gonna be one of the Dan Hicks & His Hot Licks era songs but no. Still good though. Thanks.
NotMax
It’s not viewer related.
Embedding anything from Comedy Central is always, always iffy at best, site meltdown at worst.
aimai
That is vintage John Cole. I expect him to announce he’s leaving blogging, post five or six times in a row, and then apologize to everyone. Its all part of the magic that is baloon juice.
am
Hah! I work with computers and I want to print that out and put it on my wall. I will resist the urge for the sake of professionalism. Hope your next couple of days are better than the last.
El Caganer
And is there anything more pompous than the name of that show? “The Five.” Five what? Five bonobos? Five of diamonds? Five most disfiguring venereal diseases?
ranchandsyrup
@Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader: Time to lay out your vision, Sir. Enlighten us.
BGinCHI
Can we leave Mrs. BG out of this please? What did she ever do to you, Cole?!
max
I’ve removed the damned video.
It didn’t embed intelligibly anyways.
Go to Comedy Central and find it your fucking selves.
Link: http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-january-14-2014/passion-and-intrigue-on-the-five
Autoplay was NOT on, you whiny gits
I didn’t notice it, anyways. Some people may have autoplay turned on for them.
Check yourself and your browsers before you go all up into my shit, but I tried it on a pc and a mac in firefox/safari/chrome and it never autoplayed.
Yeah, Firefox 26/PC is having problems with all the Comedy Central videos since the turn of the year. (Flash runs, no vid.) Works in Chrome though.
So I endorse NotMe’s comment.
Fuck you. I’ve had a shitty two days.
You slept in your car. In the field. With a pit bull.
max
[‘It could happen.’]
gene108
Bee only talked about four of the five hosts of The Five. What about the brunette lady? Why was she totally ignored by Mrs. Bee?
I guess only blonds matter to Mrs. Bee.
Mike in NC
I heard there was some weird stuff in the water supply in West Virginia.
Trollhattan
Dollars to donuts (mmm, donuts) there’s a long form version that was pared down to this eight minutes. Heck, never heard of the show, and now I’m in fear of being stuck in an airport with it on every video screen. (Shudder)
Mnemosyne
Since everyone else is being OT and I’m in a fightin’ mood today, Edward Snowden claims the NSA can remotely access your computer using radio waves … even if the computer is powered off and not connected to the internet:
New York Times story
Sniffsniffsniff. What’s that smell? I’d say it’s the smell of bullshit, but I’ve been assured that everything Ed Snowden says is true, so that can’t possibly be the case.
kdaug
Buck up, chief.
Missed the bitching, but life continues.
(Louder.)
dexwood
Speaking of cats and dogs – I see the 2014 Balloon Juice calendar is now in the shop. Is 37 bucks the correct price? That’s not a typo? Big jump from $22 the last two years. Good cause, true, and a labor of love, but that’s a steep increase. I’ll buy one, though, I had planned to but two.
John Cole
@dexwood: Just a placeholder price while she uploads everything. I’ll let you all know when it is available.
muricafukyea
Sounds like Cole is all ackey breaky heart over his KhristieKreme man crush gone sour.
This one goes out to Cole and his deep thoughts.
http://vimeo.com/67287909
dexwood
Thanks, John.
Mudge
A scotch, a massage, a purring cat on his lap, a dog licking his face. John will be fine.
WaterGirl
Cole, sorry about your crappy couple of days. Hope you guys are all okay at your house. And family.
Corner Stone
@Mnemosyne: Where does Snowden make any claims in that article?
Kay S
John, I’ve come out of lurkdom to say ya knows we rilly loves ya, right? Sorry about your bad couple of days.
donnah
Sorry you had a rough couple of days, John. Hope some cat and dog goodness will make things better.
Trollhattan
@Mudge:
I vote for a wet nose in each armpit and Steve dragging the Subaru out of the weeds.
El Caganer
@Mnemosyne: I don’t think it was Snowden who made the claim.
jl
Wow. That’s a good old fashioned Cole chews out the comenters.
I was getting a little worried for awhile something was happening to Cole, he was getting depressed and listless or something.
kdaug
@aimai: Ding.
I had to drag his fat ass around once, under fire. Won’t repeat the details, but the scars… searing.
raven
I had a rough couple and then made a decision that made me feel a lot better.
Ash Can
Why should I bother tracking down a video when I can read a classic John Cole rant? There’s no way the video’s going to be funnier than that.
MomSense
@John Cole:
Sorry you’ve had a shitty two days. Hope the piglets are some comfort.
Liquid
@Mnemosyne: They have to physically insert a device or otherwise provide you with equipment that has the device installed.
raven
@kdaug: At the Doha Dash no doubt!
WereBear
@Mnemosyne: Ermagerd! Wait till GG hears about this one!
p.a.
@kindness: Usually hate/hate. This love thing was disturbing. I think that JpodCole got beamed back up, and the real thing is back on earth. Those alien anal probes make you cranky. Terran probes do too.
eataTREE
John Cole is now my favorite technical support representative of all time.
kdaug
@BGinCHI:
Interesting point. I go days without looking in a mirror. When I do glance, I’m briefly startled by the rugged yet remarkably handsome gent staring back at me, but then I get on with other business.
The woman, however….
fordpowers
and.. the fucking assholes complaining are probably looking at it on internet explorer. for that alone – they should be shot.
Keith G
@Corner Stone: Ha! You are expecting a truthful discourse? Silly boy.
Job loss? Cancer? An important relationship 86-ed? A good friend pass away? You tested positive?
Were it any of those, I am truly sorry. Less than the above, why crap on people?
SiubhanDuinne
@Trollhattan:
Fixed for the 1%. Or the 53%. Or the 73%. Whatevs %.
Violet
Vintage Cole! So good to see. Say, can I ask for some help with my computer? Can you tell me how to get the cup holder to stay available all the time? It keeps disappearing!
Seriously, sorry you’ve had some bad days. Hope things improve. January is so often teh suxxors.
Violet
@raven: Still feeling good about your decision?
the Conster
Cole, you need a friend like mine – a certified CA pot grower (West County, Sonoma) who send their friends packages that turn those frowns upside down.
MikeJ
@Mnemosyne:
Tempest has been around for a long time. If we were to drive through the suburbs of DC, I could point out buildings to you that look like plain old glass cube office buildings, difference being that between the mirrored outside wall and the place where any work is done there’s a four foot air gap and a concrete wall.
Yes, somebody with the right tech could sit in a van outside your house and read your monitor just by picking up RF that leaks. No you don’t need to be connected to the internet. It does require power though.
raven
@Violet: Yea! It was probably dumb to get so worked up but I did feel a little funny bailing out. After I decided and called I was at the Y and a nurse that I know was telling me about the same surgery that her dad had. She said he was totally unable to play golf, his passion, so he went ahead. She said it was horrible for a couple of months but he’s glad he did it. I am nowhere near that. If I surf fish for a week straight it really hurts and I do get some pain in the evening after I swim. I’m going to scale back the swimming, maybe try spin and add some pt to the shoulder. It seemed like a good idea to jump on it but that long time frame just didn’t compute. I was thinking it was going to be like when I had my knee scoped but that isn’t the deal.
thx
dmsilev
@Violet:
Put a cup in it? Should work, or at least should be amusing to watch. (Don’t fill the cup with water though; might be a tad heavy…)
MikeJ
@Ash Can:
I watched the video. It wasn’t even close.
Betty Cracker
@Mnemosyne: I read the article. Are you saying that this technology doesn’t exist?
Shortstop
@Keith G: Welcome to Balloon Juice! I see you just arrived and are reading your very first post by our host!
Shortstop
I have decided that I really like cam screws.
BobbyMac
Can I just “Like” this JCole-ness? Fuck you people. Relax
Corner Stone
@Betty Cracker: I’ve read the article three times now. Capt Mnemo is at her apex here of mendacious lying liartude.
dmsilev
@Shortstop:
Been assembling some furniture, or were you just suddenly swept off your feet by a lovely Philips-head driver?
dance around in your bones
Brings to mind a comment I wrote on another epic Cole rant:
I often imagine Cole with a chain around his ankle, dragging a laptop full of a chattering cacophony of commenters and pity him somewhat, while being ever so grateful that he is here and providing the space for us to be assholes or empathetics, sappy or drunk or indignant, witty and erudite or foolish and pedantic.
It was on this thread from May 2013. Epic.
eta:that was spoze to be a blockquote, not bolded. FYWP
Corner Stone
@Betty Cracker: Oh, and btw…DAMN YOUSE!!
ESPN’s Mel Kiper makes Johnny Manziel first pick in his initial 2014 mock draft
NOOOoooOOooOOOOOOoooo!!
/Vader anguish
Yatsuno
Heh. I had to tell wifey about this one. Having said that, I’m sorry you’re going through a rough patch JC. Maybe some extra cuddles with your excellent feline will help. Or a nip from Rosie.
MikeJ
@Shortstop:
Now that Carolina is out of the playoffs he may have time to help you with that.
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
Burn this motherfucker down.
Shortstop
@dmsilev: You dirty dawg! How did you find out about my pet name for my man? Have you been spying on my laptop using existent technology?
Scamp Dog
@Mnemosyne: Based on the Times article, I’d say it’s plausible. The trick is that they have to install hardware somehow, perhaps in a USB cable, and that hardware does the communication to an NSA computer a few miles away.
Doing it while powered down sounds like nonsense, but I didn’t see that claim mentioned in the NYT article.
Mnemosyne
@El Caganer:
It was released by him as part of the documents he gave to Greenwald. How would you say it?
ETA: The article says five times that the document came from what Snowden released.
Corner Stone
@Scamp Dog:
You mean Capt Mnemo read something, scrambled it all the F up, and then just made it into whatever she wanted it to say?
Shocked! Shocked, I am!!
asiangrrlMN
@Yatsuno: Thanks for alerting me to a classic Cole rant, Yutsy. The only thing that would make me happier is if he’d posted a pic of Sir Willie Whiskerton III sticking his tongue out at us to accompany this post.
dmsilev
@Shortstop: Just lucky, I suppose.
Or possibly there’s a hole in your shielding and you need another coat of tinfoil.
Keith G
@Shortstop: I was just noting the faint attempt to duck responsibility for the Christyism.
There are bad days and then there are bad days.
Why not just own it?
Corner Stone
@Mnemosyne: It’s not a claim by Snowden. It’s in documents.
That people can read and review. And then report on.
gnomedad
John Cole won an Emmy tonight.
Schlemizel
Just watched it on rerun . . . maybe I was expecting too much after that build up bur, meh. It was OK, not great but OK.
Mnemosyne
@Betty Cracker:
I think the NSA has a vested interest in making people — especially other countries — believe that it has capabilities that it actually doesn’t, especially countries like China that are constantly spying on us electronically. That’s why I think it’s bullshit. The expert that the Times talked to said it hasn’t been done before:
Cassidy
Cat lady mumu lost at the dry cleaners? Sucks, bro.
Cassidy
@Mnemosyne: Moriarty and his line of code.
chopper
@Corner Stone:
i just melted my computer down into a pile or red-hot slag. are you guys now saying the NSA can read what’s on what’s left of my hard drive??
Jim, Foolish Literalist
I suspect the only person more upset about that clip than the four of “The Five” co-hosts mentioned in that performance is the one who has to pretend she barely noticed she wasn’t considered worthwhile enough to mock.
Shortstop
Also too, it apparently took me decades to find out that you get what you pay for with drills. I am feeling pretty spunky right now. Betty, you were right! I can do this!
Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn
Good to know that being a full-service blog still includes dealing out severe
tonguekeyboard lashings.Whip me! Beat me! Moderate my comments!
Damn, I feel so ALIVE!
Baud
I’ve had a good couple of days.
Anyone got a link to that video?
Corner Stone
@chopper: I don’t know what you’re even blabbering about. Maybe you need more meat in your diet?
jenn
Sorry to hear that you’ve had a sucky couple of days, John. My Rx: chocolate, tea, a good book/movie, and a couple of dogs to warm the feet. Feel free to revise as appropriate! :)
Yatsuno
@asiangrrlMN: We weren’t going to get that lucky. But any JC rant is worth listening to, if for no other reason than he doesn’t hold back when he’s scolding us.
Cassidy
@Baud: Asked and provided.
burnspbesq
@Mnemosyne:
Chloe could do it on “24.” Why do you doubt The Almighty NSA?
Baud
@Cassidy:
Thanks!
JPL
@chopper: Well duh! You could be in my shoes, my hard drive is boring.
Laertes
Re the update: You’re awesome. You’re an inspiration to take-no-shit-from-whiners everywhere. Rant on, brother.
burnspbesq
@Corner Stone:
Shame you weren’t electrocuted.
Jade Jordan
John’s been drinking tainted water. Be kind to him.
Baud
@Cassidy:
Oh you
danielx
I foresee a great future for Cole as an aide to Chris Christie – I understand there are several openings and he most definitely has the right attitude.
SiubhanDuinne
@Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn:
Batti, batti
Cassidy
@Baud: At least it was a genuine “good day” and not a rickroll.
Matt McIrvin
@Mnemosyne: The article doesn’t say anything about the computer being powered down. If somebody can physically access your computer and stick something into a USB port, they can spy on you; that’s basic computer security, and not particularly surprising.
Shortstop
@Jade Jordan: Wasn’t that a song by the…no. No, I can’t.
raven
@SiubhanDuinne: So where were you yesterday? Classic Center, Georgia Center. . .?
Bill E Pilgrim
@chopper: Could you move the slag a little to the left?
We’re not getting a good signal here.
danielx
@Matt McIrvin:
It’s at least as plausible as the NSA inserting hardware into computers and routers before they’re shipped to end users…actually, it sounds like one and the same.
Mnemosyne
@Matt McIrvin:
See, if the US is spying on China, Iran, and Mexican drug gangs, they must be using the same technology inside the US to spy on engadget readers! It’s the only thing that makes sense!
Bill E Pilgrim
@Scamp Dog: Right. The interviews I’ve heard and that NYT article are talking about having to get someone to insert a thumb drive in a computer to install whatever this is, or maybe a USB cable that gets swapped out for a regular one somewhere along the way. Radio signals are what comes out of the computer, not how they hack into it. Though maybe once things are set up they can go the other way also. The report on NPR today said it can transmit as many as eight miles away, to a briefcase-sized receiver.
Shortstop
@danielx: What’s “at least as plausible”? That it can be done to a powered-down device? Because nobody but Mnemosyne is saying that anyone at all is making that claim, and she’s declining to back herself up.
JPL
John, I’m sorry you had a shitty couple of days.
Number One Blah
One other front pager puts links “Below the fold” or however you guys call it. This way auto play or not we are forwarned and know what we are getting into.
maya
I gather Cole still hasn’t found the mustard.
Suffern ACE
So if I were going to send out a computer breaking radio wave, I’d probably send it out during Opie and Anthony. I’m assuming most computers try to tune in when we’re not around.
SiubhanDuinne
@raven: Tate Student Center
Shortstop
@Bill E Pilgrim: Part of the confusion stems from Mnemosyne reading that the combination of technologies allows a scale and sophistication that allows the NSA to penetrate particular systems no one has been able to access before, and somehow interpreting that to mean that no one has ever done this before at all.
Bill E Pilgrim
@kdaug:
I’ve never seen anyone describe “wearing a toupee” quite that way. Works though.
MikeJ
@Bill E Pilgrim:
“Hack” is a term that is applied very loosely to a wide variety of things. No, they might not be able to take over your computer and cause it to run code you don’t want via RF, but they certainly read your screen and watch everything you type.
Citizen_X
Geez, it’s not like you’ve been driving a lot recently or anything.
schrodinger's cat
Help Desk Kitteh is here to help. No, not really…
raven
@SiubhanDuinne: Oh boy, great parking!
Mnemosyne
@Shortstop:
I retract “powered down.” That was something only Infowars was claiming. Can we drop that distraction now?
Bill E Pilgrim
@MikeJ: Right, I just meant not how they gain access. This sounds like it’s running something on your computer, and they do it by having physical access.
The reports I’ve been hearing don’t leave any room for this being some paranoid fantasy, BTW, I mean people are saying yes, they’ve been doing that, in fact one of the things they’re complaining about is that now they can’t use the “Hey, use this USB cable why not” trick anymore.
Baud
The sad thing about the NSA’s radio wave spying tech is that it works better than Comcast at transmitting information.
Yatsuno
@efgoldman: She’s a JRT. Never ever EVER doubt the capabilities of a Jack Russel Terrorist.
kdaug
@Bill E Pilgrim: Shit you wish, Pilgrim. I’d love to be balding. I keep cutting this fucking hair off, and it keeps growing back.
I ain’t really got hair anywhere else, so I reckon all the “Yea! Let’s Grow!” genes migrated to my head. Irish/Scottish/Swede mutt. We ain’t known for our swarthyness.
Bill E Pilgrim
@Baud: Okay then Mr Brown, in order to provide technical support, do you mind if I take over your desktop? Oh wait, we already did. Silly me.
JPL
Anne had the Springsteen/Fallon youtube early this morning… Mistermix had the same you tube this afternoon and I was hoping for a Cole repeat. Maybe I was thinking to much.
Corner Stone
@Mnemosyne:
Your entire fucking comment was a garbage assed distraction. And just bullshit from start to finish.
In other words, one of your usual comments.
Baud
@Bill E Pilgrim:
If Comcast is capable of taking over my computer, they’re ten times more competent than I gave them credit for.
SiubhanDuinne
@raven: Seriously, yes! I was quite surprised (pleasantly).
Bill E Pilgrim
@Baud: Good point. I was sort of doing Comcast realizing that the NSA had already given them access. I think. Who knows.
windpond
@kindness: Yes you can. John’s blogging, complaining, responding, swearing. That’s the part I’ve missed for many months and now it’s back.
Jebediah, RBG
@efgoldman:
Wish I could say the same. Movie-star handsome, my dad was. Towering integrity, too, and wouldn’t toot his own horn with a gun to his head. He’s been gone since 1996, goddamnit.
A Humble Lurker
And it’s just another day at balloon juice.
Anne Laurie
@El Caganer:
They’re honestly proud they can count that high.
Mnemosyne
@kdaug:
Irish hair. There’s nothing you can do but go with it.
Fluke bucket
Now THIS is the Cole that hooked me and keeps me coming back for more!!!
danielx
@Shortstop:
No, I was referring to the whole physical access deal. However, now that you mention it, I’m investing in a new tinfoil hat – they can read your brain waves! Alex Jones says so!
Note: you’re correct about getting what you pay for with drills, but god-DAMN are they getting expensive.
Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn
@SiubhanDuinne: @SiubhanDuinne: OK, that chick needs help.
Mj_Oregon
I appreciate what you do here, John. Come back when you can and tell us why you had a shitty couple of days. Until then, blessings on you and your little canine/feline family.
cckids
@sparrow:
Ha. Its been a long time, but in 1985 I was in NYC, touring Parsons Design School. A local guy, on finding out I was from Nebraska, asked , in all seriousness, if we had buffalo roaming the streets, and if the Native Americans were friendly. Oy,
MikeJ
@cckids: That’s Wyoming, not Nebraska, duh. You just have sand dunes and Warren Buffet.
catclub
@Mudge: “a massage” pedicure
Shortstop
@Keith G: Well, right now the tally seems to be dozens amused vs. one offended. I agree that keeping perspective is important, as you tell Cole, but are you sure you don’t want to give that a try yourself?
chopper
@danielx:
heh. infowars. srsly.
Shortstop
@Mnemosyne: Well, all right, but the rest of your original assertions aren’t faring much better in this thread. Is there a one left standing? At any rate, tardy and ungracious as it was, I will treasure the only walkback I’ve ever seen you make. I admit I didn’t think you had it in you.
Shortstop
@chopper: Never saw it until tonight. Doesn’t seem to have much crossover with the NYT. Also, should be prosecuted for crimes against typography.
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@Shortstop:
You probably should hang around more if you’ve never seen me retract anything before.
Though I’m curious to see if the New York Times changes their opinion that Snowden deserves amnesty. After all, who really cares if he let the Chinese, Iranians, and Mexican drug cartels know how the US spies on them, amirite? It’s not like we need to know what they’re up to.
themann1086
“Error found between keyboard and chair”
different-church-lady
@Kenn: Who are you again?
different-church-lady
@Mnemosyne:
Wait, I think I see the problem: you read Infowars.
@Baud: Snerk!
GHayduke (formerly lojasmo)
@Corner Stone:
I am surprised that this bothers you, of all people.
Feel better, John.
max
@Mnemosyne: Since everyone else is being OT and I’m in a fightin’ mood today, Edward Snowden claims the NSA can remotely access your computer using radio waves … even if the computer is powered off and not connected to the internet:
Sigh. Fine. You have heard of ‘bugs’ right? Little devices private investigators & the CIA use to listen in on people? Those tend to communicate with the world using radio waves.
This would be the same basic idea here. In particular, if the NSA can intercept new devices in transit prior to first use, they can insert advice before hand. As for the networking aspects, radio waves are very common in networking. You will have heard of WiFi, I imagine, yes? Also Bluetooth? (I doubt you will have heard of ham radio networking (via shortwave), but that also exists.)
There are circumstances in which deploying a bug this way would fail, but it depends entirely on the circumstances and who it is you are trying to spy upon. It could be a particular operation might be implausible, but I haven’t heard any specifics, so nothing to say about that. Of course, what they could do is simply install crap on, say, every new computer shipping to Iran, and hope that some or most of them are reachable, and then they could simply write off the ones that don’t. (The Chinese version of this is to install crap in their router firmware, a danger brought to our attention by…the NSA and other national security types. So evidently they don’t find the concept of doing something like this as implausible. Of course, if you’re deeply invested in hyping the Yellow Peril and maybe not so much invested in the dangers of somewhat megalomaniacal Bush administration holdovers than there’s not much I could say that would change your mind. I’m assuming not big on the foreign policy stylings of Bill Kristol though.)
The more interesting phenomenon (to me anyways) is the persistent BIOS infector. That would have been impossible (more or less) in 1990 and very very hard/non-functional in 2000, but times & technology change, and apparently they finally got that to work.
max
[‘And yes, if you’re near an extremely powerful radio transmitter, it can light up your metal fillings – an awesomely power radio transmitter would eventually cause them to melt. The tinfoil hat thing, on the other hand, is silly.’]
Uncle Cosmo
Trust you, Cole? On something having to do with the performing arts? Never again. I don’t care what obscure shtick from my young-adulthood Bee might have been trying to parody, I had to shut that “performance” down after a minute and a half to keep from puking my guts out at its sheer offkey hamhandedness. It doesn’t deserve an Emmy, it deserves cremation with the ashes scattered over the Kanawha River, (Note I am referring to the “performance” & not the performer–though she sounds like she could use a remedial course at Famous Actors School…)
bewleys
That ACA thing you said in the header, was what I was thinking.
The Government is rolling out a program as big as Social Security in its day, except with millions of more citizens, and it should be flawless?
What planet are you people living on?
Jesus wept.
The bar here is pretty high, along with the incomes, I´m sure.
brantl
@MikeJ: I’m a computer technician, and you’re nuts. Period.