But We’ve Got the Biggest Balls of Them All!

I’m speechless:

House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) on Tuesday blamed the Obama administration for a disastrous chemical spill in West Virginia.

He said at a news conference in D.C. that the country had enough environmental and health regulations, but they were not being properly enforced.

“The issue is this, we have enough regulations on the books,” Boehner remarked. “What the administration ought to be doing is actually doing their jobs. Why wasn’t this plant inspected since 1991?”

“I am entirely confident that there are ample regulations already on the books to protect the health and safety of the American people,” Boehner added. “Somebody ought to be held accountable here.”

“What we try to do is look at those regulations that we think are cumbersome, are over-the-top and are costing our economy jobs. That’s what our focus continues to be.”

Every asshole in Ohio who voted for this putrid fuck should be waterboarded with methylcyclohexene methanol.

What are the odds on our intrepid media confronting this orange shitheel over this outrageous bullshit, and, I dunno, actually looks at the history of deregulation and Republican efforts to neuter the EPA and other regulators? I put the odds at zero and dropping.

93 replies
  1. 1
    El Cid says:

    He raises a good point — why did Obama order the stand-down in Benghazi West Virginia?

  2. 2
    Boudica says:

    According to the report I heard on npr, storage facilities are not subject to the same regulations as production plants. So clearly we do NOT have enough regulations. Boehner is an ass.

  3. 3
    txvoodoo says:

    1. reduce funding for everything except GOP ideas.
    2. wait for shit to happen
    3. Blame Obama!
    4. Profit. (that’s part of all the steps, actually)

  4. 4
    RaflW says:


    Non-stop, Devil drives my Gremlin, lie like you’re gonna die tomorrow offense.

    And the press loves it, it sells papers and earns clicks. Who gives a shit if its true?

  5. 5
    Boudica says:

    So I’m sure he’ll get right on it, correcting that little lapse in our regulatory wasteland.

  6. 6
    Amir Khalid says:

    I feel a song coming on.

  7. 7
    Lex says:

    I’ll bet the Weeping Cheeto would be whining out the other side of his mouth had the spill occurred in the Potomac.

    That said, “Every asshole in Ohio who voted for this putrid fuck should be waterboarded with methylcyclohexene methanol.” THIS. So much this.

  8. 8
    HinTN says:

    Who gives a shit if it’s true?


  9. 9
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    “Somebody ought to be held accountable here.”

    Maybe the people who want the government small enough to drown in a bathtub? Let’s start with them.

  10. 10
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    Why wasn’t this plant inspected since 1991?”


    Obama’s been President since 1991?

    No wonder Republicans are upset w/ the man…

  11. 11
    HinTN says:

    Damn if I can make this mobile shit work, but you know what I meant

  12. 12
    PeakVT says:

    Chemical manufacturers are required to be inspected in West Virginia, but chemical storage facilities are not.

    States’ “rights” strikes again.

  13. 13
    HinTN says:

    Must have Weeping Cheeto as tag line NOW

  14. 14
    jl says:

    @The Republic of Stupidity:

    ” Obama’s been President since 1991? ”

    The sheeples have already forgotten about Obama’s time machine.

  15. 15
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    It’s telling that the banner ad is “Vote now! Is Obama the worst President in history?” sponsored, of course, by TeaParty.org.

    I’d click through to give John the shekels, but I suspect that the choices would be “Worst President in History,” “Worst President Ever,” and “Worst President of Your Lifetime.”

  16. 16
    SiubhanDuinne says:


    the Weeping Cheeto

    Oh yes, this.

    Also, would make a good band name, rotating tag, etc.

  17. 17
    MikeJ says:

    @The Republic of Stupidity:

    Obama’s been President since 1991?

    Don’t you remember back when his wife Hillary was killing all those people?

  18. 18
    NotMax says:

    I’m speechless


    This is more par for the course spin from both sides of the Speaker’s face (when expedient for him to do so) – pro-corporatist and try to shift culpability to the administration and ‘big government.’

    Had he said almost anything else, speechlessness might be justified.

  19. 19
    liberal says:

    @Lex: yeah, that’s a great line.

  20. 20
    bmoak says:

    Didn’t Manchin take the Obama Administration EPA to court and win when he was governor, forcing them to roll back some of their regulations?

  21. 21
    🎂 Martin says:

    @jl: No, no – it’s not Obama’s time machine. It’s the CIAs time machine – Obama just used it to go to Mars. And College of the Siskiyous is a lovely little campus. I never knew why it existed until I read that story. It all makes sense now.

  22. 22
    Bubblegum Tate says:

    Boy, I can’t wait for the GOP’s proposal to raise the revenue to fully fund the EPA and get additional inspectors out there to enforce these regulations! Comin’ any day now, I’m sure.

  23. 23
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Bubblegum Tate: Isn’t there a spending bill in the hopper? A quick amendment adding the funding and Bob’s your uncle.

  24. 24

    Chutzpah – murdering your parents, then asking the court for leniency because you’re an orphan.

  25. 25
    The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik says:

    Christ all. No fucking shame.

  26. 26
    The Dangerman says:

    Imagine you’re Boehner; you’re watching your early presumptive nominee going down in flames (Christie will be lucky if he only gets impeached; there may be jail in his future) and all the candidates you have left are all collectively several goldfish shy of a full aquarium. I mean, fuck all, the early leader now has to be Santorum. Sanfuckingtorum. You’d be drinking heavily, too.

    Why attribute to evil what can easily be explained as being drunk off your ass?

  27. 27
    Mike in NC says:

    Darrell Issa needs to hold hearings about this outrage!

  28. 28
    ChrisNYC says:

    How they look at themselves in the mirror, all GOPers, and some Dems, still escapes me. How does he not just break down and cry at the terrible tragedy of it. He’s the Speaker of the House and he just goes out and spews crap and nonsense and gets nothing done. Really, how in the hell does he drag himself out of bed in the morning?

  29. 29

    @The Dangerman: Ah, for the opportunity to cross over and vote for Santorum in the Missouri sort of primary again in 2016.

  30. 30
    Freemark says:

    By any chance do you remember the Joe Isuzu commercial with him connected to a lie detector?

    I’d love to see that hooked up to any Republican on TV.

  31. 31
    beltane says:


    Really, how in the hell does he drag himself out of bed in the morning?

    A pounding headache will do wonders in this regard.

  32. 32
    Wag says:


    But wasn’t the ACA a Republican idea?

    It was?

    Ok. Let’s fully finance it, then.

  33. 33
    Stacy says:

    Methyi cyclohexane methanol-gate is not as much fun as yelling BENGHAZI so I don’t see it catching on as the next Obamascandal.

  34. 34
    beltane says:

    @Stacy: Too bad it wasn’t benzine or they could combine the two Obamascandals.

  35. 35
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Stacy: Let’s see: Methyi cyclohexane methanol = MCM = 1900 which is like 1600 and what is Obama’s street address?

    ETA: I probably missed a few steps, but that’s the outline.

  36. 36
    Wag says:


    If you call it MCMG it sounds like a drug. Maybe that’s the key to getting the GOP to regulate things. War on drugs!

  37. 37
    MomSense says:

    Agent Orange and the rest of them would never get away with this crap if we had a functioning media that worked in the public interest.

  38. 38
    amk says:

    Isn’t brazen lying the standard schtick of the rw’ers? Look at pox news, limpaugh, beckster and other such rw multimillionaires who grew their wealth merely on american ignorance and idiocy.

  39. 39
    sidhra says:

    I blame Jomo Kenyatta.

  40. 40
    mdblanche says:

    Every asshole in Ohio who voted for this putrid fuck should be waterboarded with methylcyclohexene methanol.

    If it makes you feel any better, the Grim Weeper’s district is downstream from this spill. I know that makes me feel better. I’ve really found myself losing the ability to sympathize with red state victims of these types of disasters lately. If they don’t want to regulate their chemical tanks maybe the rest of us should ignore their cries for help when the hoocouldaknowed hits the fan.

  41. 41
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @sidhra: I’ll see your Kenyatta, and raise you Dedan Kimathi.

  42. 42
    sidhra says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: And the Nairobi Trio.

  43. 43
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @sidhra: That was unexpected.

  44. 44
    Davis X. Machina says:

    You can’t change the Narrative. Everyone who remembers when it was real has to die first.

    The deficit is exploding. Inflation is rampant.
    Taxes are too high. Regulations are too tight.

    These things just are

  45. 45
    sidhra says:

    “Boehner’s Funding From Coal up 2,400 Percent”

  46. 46
    NotMax says:


    Kovacs doesn’t get referenced as much as he ought.

    Thank you.

  47. 47
    sidhra says:

    I suspect John of Orange hasn’t been clamoring for enforcement since at least 2011. Nice of him to chime in now. Disingenuousness is not for the squeamish.

  48. 48
    Higgs Boson's Mate says:


    And the Nairobi Trio.


  49. 49
    Little Boots says:


  50. 50
    Little Boots says:

    but honestly, john, didn’t you like these people once upon a time?

    hopefully, everyone gets it, now.

  51. 51
  52. 52
    Little Boots says:

    oh, just react people.

    john doesn’t care.

  53. 53
  54. 54
    Citizen_X says:


    Boehner’s Funding From Coal up 2,400 Percent

    And there’s the punchline.

  55. 55
    David b says:

    I’m a dem and I take offense at your language. People on such a platform as this should learn to speak properly and somewhat more respectfully, if you want people to listen to you and take you for real.

  56. 56
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Violet: Is that enough in TX?

  57. 57
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    republicans are doomed. and it’s a good thing.

  58. 58
    mclaren says:

    John Boehner’s argument proves perfectly valid…against the Reagan administration.

    Anyone else remember that the Reagan Dept. of the Interior was so lax in enforcing the provisions of the EPA that the Sierra Club had to take the Reagan administration to court to get them to enforce the Clean Water Act?

    When he assumed the presidency in 1981, Ronald Reagan placed near the top of his domestic policy agenda the goal of reducing compliance burdens associated with environmental controls and other health and safety regulations. In his first State of the Union message, the new president said that `a virtual explosion in government regulations during the past decade’ had caused `higher prices, lower employment, and lower productivity growth.’

    Source: “The Reagan judiciary and environmental policy: the impact of appointments to the federal court of appeals,” Boston College Environment Affairs Law Review, Vol. 18, No. 4, 1 August 1991.

  59. 59
    Violet says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: TPM article says this:

    Davis’ campaign believes she must raise over $40 million to beat Abbott.

  60. 60
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    ya know what, buddy, I’m so pissed at the universe, right now, but I can’t fight the universe, so, I’ll stop.

  61. 61
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Of course it is. But they can do a shitload of damage in their death throes. Stuff that will take a generations to fix.

  62. 62
    Citizen_X says:

    @Violet: You know, Texas Monthly honestly does a good deal of quality reporting. But–in addition to all the other reasons–I’d like to see Wendy win just to make them eat that ridiculously presumptive cover.

  63. 63
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I am so damned pissed about something on another site. so, um, this has nothing to do with you. so, um, dammit.

  64. 64
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @mclaren: There is a difference between lax enforcement due to inclination and lax enforcement due to insufficient resources. Reagan was one; Obama is the other.

  65. 65
    Little Boots says:

    omnes, you hate when I post music, but really:


  66. 66
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: I’ve been listening to Hole since the end of Justified tonight, so it’s all good.

  67. 67
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    what about tina?

  68. 68
    KG says:

    @The Dangerman: a slightly more ambitious politician would be using the opportunity to run for the nomination. As Speaker he could claim the next in line mantle, he’s got name recognition, etc etc. Best case scenario you make a bit of history by being President and Speaker. Alternatively, you win the nomination, lose the general and ride off into the griftsunset, writing memoirs and getting speaking gigs and seats on boards of directors. Of course, Boehner would be the worst case scenario because the base thinks he’s an Orange RINO and hate him, so he’d probably lose Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina in resounding fashion

  69. 69
    Little Boots says:

    omnes, you are withdrawing. and that is sad.

  70. 70
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    hole is not tina.

    you are terrible to think that.

  71. 71
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @KG: No. Boehner knows he has reached his ceiling. He is a machine bagman. He gets his money, and he does what he is asked to do. He gets a good lifestyle. Trying to go above where he is will expose everything. he has no desire to do it.

  72. 72
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:


  73. 73
    Little Boots says:

    oh go upstairs

  74. 74
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Dude, 1) I like Courtney. Always have. 2) I wasn’t comparing. 3) Courtney reminded me of both Louise Wener and Justine Frischman, So I went into a 90s women mode. Back off.

  75. 75
    Jennifer says:

    Oh, for fuck’s sake. Let’s finally end this fucking charade; have the President announce that the Democrats are going to introduce legislation providing that states who choose a wild west approach to regulation pick up the tab when the fertilizer plant explodes taking out schools and half the town, or when chemical spills from plants just upriver from drinking water supplies mean a half million people have no water. If the people in the state are ok with letting corporations shit everyone’s nest, they should have no problem paying for cleaning up the shit themselves. This argument about over-regulation will sound a lot less convincing when local governments have to start passing millage or sales tax increases to pay for cleaning up this kind of shit.

  76. 76
    Little Boots says:

    would you goobers get upstairs so I can make fun of you?????

  77. 77
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Jennifer: Dictatorship!


  78. 78
    danielx says:

    I put the odds at zero and dropping.

    That would be slim and none, and slim’s outta town.

  79. 79
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    you especially.

  80. 80
    PhilbertDesanex says:

    @David b: “Real” ? What’s that all about?

  81. 81
    Villago Delenda Est says:


    There’s also Homer Simpson hooked up to an FBI lie detector and he’s told by Fox Mulder that anything he says can be used against him in a court of law, and when asked if he understood that, he says “yes”, and the lie detector explodes.

  82. 82
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @Little Boots:

    republicans are doomed. and it’s a good thing.

    The problem is that they’re going to take the rest of us with them to doom.

  83. 83
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Villago Delenda Est: Also the Homer/Marge interaction where Marge asks him a direct question and Homer says, “Marge, I won’t lie to you.” and then just walks out of the room.

  84. 84
    Bubblegum Tate says:

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Eddie: Did you hold a grudge against Mr. Burns?

    Moe: No!

    (The lie detector buzzes, indicating a lie.)

    Moe: Okay, maybe I did, but I didn’t shoot him!

    (The lie detector dings, indicating the truth.)

    Eddie: Checks out. Okay, sir, you’re free to go.

    Moe: Good, ’cause I’ve got a hot date tonight! (buzz) Odd date. (buzz) Dinner with friends. (buzz) Dinner alone. (buzz) Watching TV alone. (buzz) Alright! I’m just going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria’s Secret catalog! (buzz) Sears catalog. (ding) Now, would you unhook this already, please?! I don’t deserve this kind of shabby treatment! (buzz)

  85. 85
    HgMn says:

    Is he asking for more inspectors ? Why don’t they call him on it ? Boner demands more inspectors for all chemical factories throughout the US! Hire more inspectors so the government can inspect your local chemical processing plant and check they are up to code. Republicans want to protect the citizenry!!

  86. 86
    NonyNony says:


    Boner demands more inspectors for all chemical factories throughout the US!

    This is actually how I’d write the headline for any report on his little drunken speech. Well, except that I’d spell his name right. Possibly.

  87. 87
    monkeyfister says:

    And House Amendments to the Budget DE-FUND the EPA Superfund.

    Those Republicans are environmental superheroes, I tell ya!

  88. 88
    Manyakitty says:

    @efgoldman: I live in Ohio. I did NOT vote for the Weeping Cheeto (LOVE this!). That said, I don’t think he cares if/where toxic spills happen, just as long as they don’t inconvenience the corporations people he actually represents.

  89. 89
    Flukebucket says:

    Weeping Cheeto shall now start to pop up all over Facebook :-)

  90. 90
    El Cid says:

    @Lex: “Weeping Cheeto” LMAO

  91. 91
    chopper says:

    Sir Accuse, Orangeman is just doing what he always does.

  92. 92
    J R in WV says:

    For what it’s worth, I live near the Methyl Death leak. The latest news is the Freedom Enterprises founder is a 2 time coke dealer.

    They knew their tank was leaking. They used one (1) cinder-block and one (1) 50 LB sack of absorbent to control the leak, which was 4 (FOUR!!!) feet wide.

    I’m hoping someone goes to jail for failing to abate the situation AND failing to call the water company and the DEP to alert everyone to the problem.

    Not likely, but hope springs eternal, just like toxic leaks!

  93. 93
    Sondra says:

    I too have read other articles which say the same thing. Plants that process “clean coal” in West Virginia are regulated but storage facilities in West Virginia are not regulated.

    I’m betting their Republican Legislature arranged it this way and/or the storage facilities have taken advantage of a loop-hole.

    I don’t know if there are Federal Regulations on Storage Facilites: maybe one of you know?

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