Because I grew up with four younger brothers, I knew this was gonna happen. Via NYMag, Andrew Couts at Digital Trends tests out his iPhone 5S’s touch recognition system:
… Lastly, I went with the most secure body part I could think of – and all I will say is that I had to take off my pants. Unlike the knuckle and elbow, however, registering my nether region was a breeze. (It was quite chilly, in fact.) And not only did I successfully register this private part with relative ease, I was also able to use it to unlock the device. I think you can understand why there isn’t a video of this one.
Of course, using your junk to secure your iPhone isn’t just gross and absurd, it’s also impractical – you won’t be able to unlock your handset in public without drawing some unwanted attention, for example. But given that you leave your fingerprints everywhere, and that hackers have already broken through Touch ID’s defenses using a photocopy of a fingerprint and some wood glue, your manhood may be the most secure option you have.
Now, excuse me. I have to go buy some Purell.
Apart from finding the brain bleach, what’s on the agenda for the evening?