Okay, okay: Here’s your damn college football open thread


Go ‘Cocks!

207 replies
  1. 1
    Dolly Llama says:

    Thanks, Betty. Kentucky fought the good fight.

  2. 2
    Yatsuno says:

    I was a wee bit worried for The Dangerman’s heart there for a bit. But then out of nowhere UCLA remembered how to play football.

    Oh and GO ILLINI!!!

  3. 3
  4. 4
    SiubhanDuinne says:


  5. 5
    kbuttle says:

    Roll Tide, from London.

  6. 6
  7. 7
    Botsplainer says:

    Only a broadcast team from ESPN could be so in the tank for the SEC that they could pretend that a 4th and 10 play with 1:40 left to go (and 14 points to cover) would potentially lead to a win.

    I’m calling them ESECPN from now on.

  8. 8
    Amir Khalid says:

    You said college football open thread, right? So …
    It’s been a good Saturday for Liverpool FC in the English Prem. Last week’s second placed club, Chelsea, have lost 0 – 1 at Everton; so on Monday, Liverpool need only beat Swansea, mired in the relegation-zone, to return to the top of the table with a three-point lead.

  9. 9
    Yatsuno says:


    I’m calling them ESECPN from now on.

    You just noticed this now? I swear Corso gets wood every time he says SEC. Kinda like Grandpa Walnuts and wars.

  10. 10
    Tommy says:

    @Yatsuno: I am an SEC guy (LSU). But live in Big Ten country (go Ilini). Look the SEC is really good (see all the national championships in a row), but if I wasn’t a SEC guy I am sure I’d be pretty sick of hearing how good we are. My parents always taught me when you are good at something you don’t have to talk about it.

  11. 11
    Botsplainer says:


    Noticed it long ago, just hadn’t concocted the name.

    And Lee Corso is never right.

  12. 12
    OzarkHillbilly says:


    My parents always taught me when you are good at something you don’t have to talk about it.

    Your parents were a little different than mine. My old man taught me that if you can’t kick a man when he’s down, when can you kick him? ;-)

  13. 13
    Cassidy says:

    @Botsplainer: @Yatsuno: Ya’ll are just jealous that the NC is being decided today.

  14. 14
    Botsplainer says:


    Rooting for injuries all around….

  15. 15
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    After looking at that pic, I’d bet you don’t let your little one play in the yard, do you Betty?

  16. 16
    raven says:

    Fucking Michigan holds on!

  17. 17
    raven says:


  18. 18
    Maxwel says:

    One of my alma maters just beat my ~home town team.

  19. 19
    Moonbatting Average says:

    So close, Akron. So. damn. close.

  20. 20
    Tommy says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: File this under I might yell someday to “get off my lawn.” Your comment got me thinking about what I said to somebody, a parent the other day.

    I live in a rural town of 5,500. Maybe the safest town in America.

    I live on the edge of town, heck a 5,000 acre soybean field in front of my house.

    Walking to the 7-11 type store yesterday to get a soda. Kids where coming home from school on the bus. I’ve seen this many times before, but I never say anything. Parents drive like 2-3 blocks from their homes to pick their kids up from the bus stop. These are not 4 year olds. Almost teens.

    I noted to a mother it was like 82, not a cloud in the sky. I’d seen parents doing this for years and I just had to ask, couldn’t they just walk home?

    I was politely told to mind my own business, which I should have, but I just had to ask.

  21. 21
    raven says:

    @Tommy: I bleed Orange and Blue and their is no comparison, the SEC rules.

  22. 22
    raven says:

    @Tommy: Didn’t just have a little girl murdered in that area last week?

  23. 23
    SiubhanDuinne says:


    Illinois stole their fight song from my high school.

  24. 24
    Tommy says:

    @raven: Well I am sure there was, East St. Louis is only a few miles from me. Folks killed there it seems almost daily. But in my town nothing like that. I look at the crime report each year and crime breaks down to this (1) Kids being kids. (2) Way to many men beating their wives/girlfriends (filed under domestic violence calls — and seems to be “covered” up). Outside that nothing. Heck I don’t even lock my front door and I don’t know other people that think/worry about that either.

  25. 25
  26. 26
    The Dangerman says:


    I was a wee bit worried for The Dangerman’s heart there for a bit.

    I’ll admit, I thought they were done; they could have come out sky high OR flat as a pancake…

    …I didn’t think that OR could have been an AND, but it was. Fine, fine win.

    That wasn’t really a squeaker, so I guess that means Bama will win in a close one.

    ETA: Nah, Bama is gonna kick their ass.

  27. 27
    raven says:

    @Tommy: I don’t lock my door much but the Bodhisattva is a mighty guard.

  28. 28
    Baud says:


    Have you considered the possibility that maybe it’s you they’re afraid of?
    (Just kidding.)

  29. 29
  30. 30
    pamelabrown53 says:

    Dear Betty,

    Cocks, Croks or Gators?

    I live in a rich republican hamlet of Florida, Gators rule.

  31. 31
    Dolly Llama says:

    God fucking DAMN, A&M just made Alabama look stupid. Fuck. I harbor nothing but ill will for Johnny Signball, but damn. That was what it was.

  32. 32
    The Dangerman says:

    I’m still not buying what A&M is selling…

    …but I’ll settle for an exciting game. Or a blowout and a nap. I’m easy.

  33. 33
    Shana says:

    I’m surprised I’m the first to comment on the Bloggess reference.

  34. 34
    Tommy says:

    @Baud: LOL. Outside of a few elderly folks, I am about the only person of child raising age (44) that doesn’t have kids within a block or two of my house. They are everywhere. I bought my parents house I grew up in, so I know this area as a kid. Within a baseball throw of my house, or at least a nine iron there are enough kids to start a football team. I never see them outside. They never walk home from school. I am sorry, I just find that strange.

    Now just to note as a kid my dad and I built a computer from a kit in like 1982. I had every gaming system. Pong. Atari 2600. Commedore 64. I was a geek, but after an hour or so I was told to go outside and play. I don’t see kids playing outside.

  35. 35
    raven says:

    @The Dangerman: Their D is zipola.

  36. 36
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @raven: Well, I was thinking specifically of the Loyalty Song. But on doing some Googling, I am finding some contrary information, and if I’m wrong I beg to offer an unqualified non-apology apology :-)

    When I was growing up (third-generation Oak Parker) it was an unquestioned article of faith that the song was written for OPRFHS and later adopted by U of Illinois. My grandmother and great-aunt were OP class of 1910, and it was well-established by then as the school fight song. But I can’t track down a date of first use in OP. A couple of sources tell me it was written for Illinois in 1906, so certainly possible they were there first, but not for long.

    Not that it matters. Great fight song, I’ve always thought.

  37. 37
    Jerzy Russian says:

    @efgoldman: I have two questions regarding the Huskers:

    1. How do you prevent the Huskers from scoring over 50 points?

    2. What does the N on their helmets stand for?

    The answers will be forthcoming.

  38. 38
    raven says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: It’s the singer not the songgggg/

    The same old places and the same old songs
    We’ve been going there for much too long
    There’s something wrong and it gives me that feeling
    inside that I know I must be right
    It’s the singer not the song
    It’s the singer not the song
    It’s the singer not the song

  39. 39
    raven says:

    @Jerzy Russian: They whined like fucking babies when the Dawgs kicked their asses in the bowl game last year, fuck em.

  40. 40
    Dolly Llama says:

    @efgoldman: And you would be. Fuck, if A&M wins, we’ll never heard the fucking end of it.

  41. 41
    Hill Dweller says:

    The 2nd false start call on Alabama was BS, but they showed very little composure in that first series.

  42. 42
    MattF says:

    I hope everyone realizes that the croc on the front page is only a baby. Less than six feet, looks to me. Just a cutie pie! AWWWW…

  43. 43
    Tommy says:

    I dislike Bama as an LSU guy, but I actually might hate A&M, if for no other reason then when I went to the campus there are large parts of it where there are signs telling you not to walk on the grass (no clue if they are still there). Oh and when I was at LSU in the early 90s they were a powerhouse and we had them the first game of the year (and we totally, totally sucked). They put up like 50+ points on us just cause they could.

  44. 44
    Dolly Llama says:

    @Hill Dweller:

    The 2nd false start call on Alabama was BS

    Damn right it was.

  45. 45
    raven says:

    @efgoldman: Two penalties on the offense does not a defense make.

  46. 46
    raven says:

    Keep running like that shithead.

  47. 47
    raven says:

    But two drives like this may a defense make. . . disappear!

  48. 48
    OzarkHillbilly says:


    Have you considered the possibility that maybe it’s you they’re afraid of?

    Heh. Some years ago I moved into an apt in not the greatest neighborhood in south St Louis. I had a walking stick with a goat skull mounted on it (long story). When I moved out, the landlord told me I was making the neighbors very happy, as they would no longer have to worry about me working a “voodoo curse” on them.

  49. 49
    Jerzy Russian says:

    @MattF: Is that a croc or a gator? I could never remember the distinction.

  50. 50
    Dolly Llama says:

    Holy fuck, this is getting really ugly, really quick.

  51. 51
    raven says:

    Someone in College Station is blowing a vuvuzuela and I keep thinking my phone is buzzing!

  52. 52
    OzarkHillbilly says:

    @Tommy: It is a different world than the one we grew up in. Some things are better, others not quite. shrug

  53. 53
    Dolly Llama says:

    @efgoldman: A shit call is a shit call, fuck you very much.

  54. 54
    Hill Dweller says:

    Saban has to either quit the bump and run coverage or give his left corner some help over the top, because he is getting scorched thus far.

  55. 55
    MattF says:

    @Jerzy Russian: Croc, I think. Crocs have long snouts, gators have short snouts. It’s possible that the babies have different proportions.

  56. 56
    Jerzy Russian says:

    @Jerzy Russian:

    1. How do you prevent the Huskers from scoring over 50 points?

    You give them the SAT.

    2. What does the N on their helmets stand for?


  57. 57
    raven says:

    @Hill Dweller: Need pressure up front.

  58. 58
    Tommy says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: I am a pretty laid back, easy going guy. Lived my entire adult life in DC until I moved back here to rural, southern IL where I grew up. I used to fly this flag (still do BTW). A person said people didn’t know what it was and thought I might support some communist nation. It is mostly red with red stars.

    I was like that is the flag for the District of Columbia, you know the nation’s capital.

  59. 59
    Corner Stone says:


    Need pressure up front.

    Bama can’t. If they don’t maintain gaps then Johnny will run for 15 every snap.
    That 5’10” corner looks like a middle schooler against that beast A&M calls a wide receiver.

  60. 60
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @MattF: Bless his pwecious widdle heart.

  61. 61
    Dolly Llama says:

    OK. We have a game again.

  62. 62
    Corner Stone says:

    I don’t think that was TD. His hand was down out before the ball crossed.

  63. 63
    raven says:

    @Tommy: My people were from DuQuoin.

  64. 64
    raven says:

    hahahaha, stfu Gary

  65. 65
    Tommy says:

    @raven: 64 to 51 and I am at your “people’s” place. Not that far. Maybe 30-45 minutes (if that). I am outside of Belleville/Scott Air Force Base.

  66. 66
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @efgoldman: Remember the joke about the Crocogator, the meanest animal in the world?

    – He has the head of a crocodile on one end (snap, snap, bite you to death!) and the head of an alligator on the other end (snap, snap, bit you to death!)
    – So if he has a crocodile head on one end and an alligator head on the other end, how does he shit?
    – He don’t. That’s what makes him so mean.

    Well, it was amusing when I was about 14.

  67. 67
    raven says:

    @Tommy: The former home of the Hambletonian! This was my mom’s aunt Venus.</a.

    &#039 I;m sure you know about Bloody Williamson.

  68. 68
    Tommy says:

    Does Bama not have a defense or is A&M actually this good? Good thing I am not a betting man, cause I didn’t think A&M was for real.

  69. 69

    Go Cocks! My fondest memories of grad school was tailgating before the football games in the shadow of the stadium in Columbia.

  70. 70
    raven says:

    @Tommy: It’s early.

  71. 71
    IowaOldLady says:

    @Tommy: I used to walk the dog the single block to meet my kid’s school bus until he was 11 because both the dog and the kid liked it. I was never worried about his safety. I just liked meeting him.

  72. 72
    Hill Dweller says:

    Saban went with the third option: switching his corners.

  73. 73
    Dolly Llama says:

    @raven: It’s early, but damn. I don’t give a damn who you are, you can’t give up 14 points to any team that quick.

  74. 74
  75. 75
    OzarkHillbilly says:


    It’s early.

    Don’t sell A&M short. I doubt they will win, but they are good, from what I have read anyway. Not that I will ever watch them. I swore off Texas a long time ago in all it’s forms. I have relatives there.

  76. 76
    PaulW says:

    Knock-knock. Land Shark.

    Seriously, though, I hope to GOD USF Bulls beat Florida Atlantic tonight. Please God, don’t make South Florida go 0-12 this year…

  77. 77
    raven says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: Well that is one hell of a convincing testimony!

  78. 78
    Tommy says:


    I got NO problem with a parent walking down there. I think that is cool. Even better if you are taking a pet out for a walk. These folks drive 1-3 blocks on a sunny day, low 80s. Before I moved back here I lived in a large metro area. Downtown. I didn’t drive for days and walked all the time. So I walk here to the little store on the corner for a paper, soda, or candy bar. I recall once, only been here a few weeks, the lady that lives next to me stopped in her car and asked if I needed a ride. I just laughed, nope I am walking. It is only four blocks round trip, nice day. She looked at me like I had a third hand growing out of my forehead.

    I guess folks just are lazy and/or they really like their cars :).

    BTW: I should note so many folks do this that the lady that owns the house where the bus stops, put up stakes and string along her yard so people won’t park their right front tire on her lawn.

  79. 79
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @PaulW: You a USF alum too?

  80. 80
    Yatsuno says:

    @efgoldman: It’s part of the deal for moving to Florida. You get your very own guard gator for protecting your property.

  81. 81
    raven says:

    Now THAT was shitty D! Looked like the Cocks secondary.

  82. 82
    IowaOldLady says:

    @Tommy: Oh. Somehow I missed the driving angle.

    My dog loved that walk, a love that was increased when one winter day we were waiting inside the entry to the middle school/high school where the bus stopped, and the dog found a cookie under a radiator. Every time we went after that, he checked under that radiator, it being the place where cookies were evidently stored.

  83. 83
    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again) says:

    When will the NCAA step up and put an end to the uniform madness at Phil Knight University?

  84. 84
    Yatsuno says:

    @Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): When Phil Knight kicks the mortal coil. Or did you think the NCAA was deciding all that?

  85. 85
  86. 86
    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again) says:


    Will no one rid the NCAA of this turbulent cobbler?

  87. 87
    Dolly Llama says:

    Good God. What piss-poor tackling on the Tide’s part there.

    ETA: I can’t believe the announcer used “signature” and “Johnny Manziel” in the same sentence just now.

  88. 88
    Botsplainer says:

    Damn, what a play. Manziel truly IS the Kweisatz Haderach!

  89. 89
    Keith P says:

    Good lord, how the hell does Bama let Manziel convert on a 3rd down like that? Shoulda been a sack, but even discounting that, no way should their secondary let A&M catch that ball.

    EDIT: OK, redemption is found in the endzone.

  90. 90
    Tommy says:

    @Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): It is amazing isn’t it. RGIII got fined for wearing a non-Nike tee-shirt in the pre-game of a NFL pre-season game this year. I played some sports at a pretty high level (up to DI) and I was totally anal about what I wore, really anal about my shoes. I’ve always wondered if a player didn’t want to wear their gear what if anything could they do (nothing of course).

  91. 91
    raven says:

    @Keith P: Um the dude is a jerk but he didn’t win the Heisman because he can’t play.

  92. 92
    raven says:

    There’s that shitty bama secondary. OOOO, Jones pushed off!

  93. 93
    Hill Dweller says:

    The FSM giveth and the FSM taketh away.

  94. 94
    raven says:

    Eat the apple and fuck the corps!

  95. 95
    raven says:

    Imagine Johnny with that time.

  96. 96
    raven says:

    Whoa Nellie. . . .

  97. 97
    Tommy says:

    @raven: If A&M doesn’t get some kind of rush, this is going to be a really long day for them. I don’t care how good your D-backs are, they can only cover folks for so long before coverage breaks down and somebody is wide open (see recent Bama drive).

  98. 98
    Yatsuno says:


    Eat the apple and fuck the corps

    Stop teasing me…

    Oh and FSU is barely handling UNR.

  99. 99
    Keith P says:

    @raven: Doesn’t matter if it’s Joe Montana – that was just a bad play on Bama’s part. Manziel threw the ball into a crowd of people, ala a Hail Mary. Shoulda been batted down at worst. Matters not, though. Bama intercepted later and got a TD on a solid passing drive.

  100. 100
    Hill Dweller says:

    @Tommy: A&M is loading up the box to stop the run. But if they start playing a pass defense, Bama will run it down their throat.

  101. 101
    raven says:

    @Keith P: This should be the land of the free and the home of the brave too. His ability got him free and the receiver got lucky.

  102. 102
    Tommy says:

    My gosh that is a terrible, terrible call! They have to overturn that ejection.

  103. 103
    raven says:

    That was some horseshit right there.

  104. 104
    raven says:

    @Tommy: If it sticks he’s gone for the next game too.

  105. 105
    Tommy says:

    @raven: He wasn’t even trying to hit him, much less “target” him. He was clearly going for the ball.

  106. 106
    Mike in NC says:

    We have a similar photo of a gator that was wandering around in our development about 5 years ago.

  107. 107
  108. 108
    Botsplainer says:

    Fucked up call.

  109. 109
    Tommy says:

    @raven: I did not know that. Glad that was overturned.

  110. 110
    Keith P says:

    @raven: “Land of the free and home of the brave”? Are you high? All I’m saying is that the Bama secondary should have batted the goddamn ball down. Give the theatrics a rest!

  111. 111
    Hill Dweller says:

    Alabama’s D-line is starting to control the line of scrimmage.

  112. 112
    raven says:

    @Tommy: Here’s the language, I was wrong about the “next game”. Depends on the half:

    The rule, passed by the Football Rules Committee in February and approved by the Playing Rules Oversight Panel in March, addresses the committee’s concern about player safety by taking more measures to remove targeting, or above the shoulder hits on defenseless players, out of the game.
    The rule in football means that discipline for players flagged for violations will mirror the penalty for fighting. If the foul occurs in the first half of a game, the player is ejected for the remainder of the game. If the foul occurs in the second half or overtime of a game, the player is ejected for the remainder of the game and the first half of the next contest.

  113. 113
    Tommy says:

    @raven: I still didn’t know that. But I also wasn’t aware it could be reviewed “upstairs.” I guess that the “targeting” part can be reviewed I kind of like the rule. No review, not so much.

  114. 114
    raven says:

    @Hill Dweller: Yea, some dumbass said they should upthread and got shouted down.

  115. 115
    raven says:

    @Tommy: Yea, I was on the road and someone on the radio gave an explanation on a pre-season show.

  116. 116
    raven says:

    @Keith P: Am I high, shit. They SHOULD have. This the first fucking game you ever watched. Somebody should do something every goddamn play.

  117. 117
    Keith P says:

    @Tommy: It’s an OK compromise insofar as it technically keeps replays out of the core game WRT to reversing penalties, but on the other hand, ejecting a player for up to 1.5 games is severe enough that it’s good to let someone take a closer look at and possibly overturn it.

  118. 118
    raven says:

    @efgoldman: Condredge Holloway.

  119. 119
    raven says:

    Yea, A&M is going to beat this team throwing up jump balls all day.

  120. 120
    Tommy says:

    @efgoldman: Yeah some guy named Manning or something :). Before that my Redskins took some QB from TN (Heath Shuler) third overall (he sucked).

  121. 121
    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again) says:

    Not that I like the Vols much, but I’ll be happy when this certain loss is overturned when the NCAA rules that PKU intentionally blinded the visitors with their unis.

  122. 122
    raven says:

    @efgoldman: Condredge was badass.

  123. 123
    raven says:

    Jesus Jerry Kill had another seizure.

  124. 124
    raven says:

    @efgoldman: He’s the Minnesota head coach. He went there from Northern Illinois and has had at least one other one on the sidelines.

    “Kill has worked with doctors to bring his seizures under better control with medication, rest, nutrition and exercise, but the stress of a game day is hard to avoid. Kill suffered a seizure in the locker room at halftime last November during a loss to Michigan State, his third documented episode during a game at Minnesota since taking over here in 2011.

    He had seizures after a defeat by Northwestern last October and also in September 2011, on the sideline near the end of his first game at TCF Bank Stadium, a loss to New Mexico State. Other episodes have occurred elsewhere, without warning as epileptics know all too well.”

  125. 125
    raven says:

    @efgoldman:It’s a living.

  126. 126
    Yatsuno says:

    @raven: Might need to remix the meds. Poor soul has to deal with more neurologists. I hate neurologists.

  127. 127
    raven says:

    @Yatsuno: He’s right there at the Mayo.

  128. 128
    Hill Dweller says:

    Looks like McCarron left his brain back in the locker room.

  129. 129
    raven says:

    There’s that shitty Bama secondary again. Bueller?

  130. 130
    Keith P says:

    Killer interception by Bama. That’s just a dagger in the heart after holding Bama to start the 2nd half.

  131. 131
    Cassidy says:

    That run was a thing of beauty.

  132. 132
    raven says:

    I bought my first color tv for the Illinois-Washington game. . . 41 years ago! I have to watch this on my laptop.

  133. 133
    Hill Dweller says:

    That amazing interception return aside, Alabama hasn’t come out ready to play in the 2nd half. They’re flat on both sides of the ball.

  134. 134
    HeartlandLiberal says:

    Friend and I went to the Indiana Bowling Green game here in Bloomington. BEAUTIFUL day, clear skies, low 70’s.

    It is hard to be an IU football fan. My friend said he had read a recent survey of how IU’s football program ranks historically. Sounds like this article, in which IU is sixth worst ever:


    Anyway, IU won this game very convincingly, and I enjoyed the fruit smoothie and the chili cheese fires, since these games allow me to indulge in such health food as the latter, balanced by the excusable fruit smoothies.

    Frankly, the team this year is looking best I have seen in a long time, especially the offense, defense still weak. We shall see what happens when we hit Big Ten conference play.

    Oh, well, basketball is coming. Victor Oladipo and Cody Zeller, who left after last season to go pro to the Magic and the Charlotte Bobcats, were in town to visit, and I suspect help with recruiting. Both were in the top 4 picks this Spring, an amazing accomplishment for the program and indication of how far Coach Crean has brought IU basketball back to life.

  135. 135
    JPL says:

    @Hill Dweller: Yup and they can’t afford to be. Earlier my son called and said Texas A&M can’t play with that intensity for four quarters. hmmm

  136. 136
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    I’m not hip on Johnny Football the next Tebow for Skip Bayless to jack off to, but reading that story about the Alabama sorority story I would like to see the Aggies win, but it doesn’t look it. GO BUCKS BEAT CAL!!!

  137. 137
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    I’m not hip on Johnny Football the next Tebow for Skip Bayless to jack off to, but reading that story about the Alabama sorority story I would like to see the Aggies win, but it doesn’t look it. GO BUCKS BEAT CAL!!!

  138. 138
    Hill Dweller says:

    Nice answer by ‘Bama.

  139. 139
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    @HeartlandLiberal: I bet the Hoosiers never beat Ohio State and Michigan in the same year or it was a long time ago, I think I will google to see if this ever happened.

  140. 140
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    @HeartlandLiberal: I bet the Hoosiers never beat Ohio State and Michigan in the same year or it was a long time ago, I think I will google to see if this ever happened.

  141. 141
    Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism says:

    @efgoldman: See, there was this QB coach at TN, worked with a young man named Manning, who then went to Ole Miss to coach another young man named Manning. He’s at Duke now. The coach, that is.

  142. 142
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    @Mr Stagger Lee: @HeartlandLiberal: I appologize, I wasn’t trying to dog you on the reply, I do know all too well what the Hoosiers do to the Buckeyes in Hoops more often than not.

  143. 143
    Hill Dweller says:

    Alabama’s defense has been poor in the 2nd half. A long drive and score by their offense would do them a lot of good.

  144. 144
    JPL says:

    Oh no! A&M has a questionable penalty. Imagine that.

  145. 145
    Joseph Nobles says:

    @efgoldman: CBS Sports had it at Aggies +9. #oops

    ETA: Well, just went back and looked. They had it Aggies +9, O/U 64. I don’t know betting that well, so you can tell me what that means.

  146. 146
    Hill Dweller says:

    Another Yeldon fumble in a big game.

    Alabama’s defense better step up this series.

  147. 147
    Keith P says:

    Piss-poor ball handling by Bama. If they can’t close the show at the half yard line, maybe they don’t deserve to win.

    EDIT: That TD may just give Saban a stroke

  148. 148
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    I bet Nick Satan is a tad pissed right now.

  149. 149
    Punchy says:

    Iowa up a TD on ISU. Suck on that, Cyclowns.

    In heaven there is no beer….

  150. 150
    Hill Dweller says:

    Alabama’s defense has been horrendous in the 2nd half.

    Why play bump and run coverage on 3rd and long at the 5 yard line?

  151. 151
    The Dangerman says:

    Alabama had better learn how to tackle before they play Oregon. Good grief.

  152. 152
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    Somebody better tell the Aggies about time management, and AJ McCarron has learned well at the feet of the Mannings

  153. 153
    raven says:

    b-bye Johnny

  154. 154
    Keith P says:

    Jeez, Bama can’t even kick an extra point without drawing a penalty. They need to get this penalty crap under control sooner rather than later. It nearly cost them this game, and at some point, it will cost them a game.

  155. 155
    Hill Dweller says:

    Nice answer by the Alabama offense.

  156. 156
    Dolly Llama says:

    Well, that’s that. Johnny Signball gets to suck eggs tonight. I’m flipping over to the Vanderbilt/South Carolina game now. I’d normally be cheering Vanderbilt all the way, but fuck that noise now. Ain’t cheering for a pack of cokehead gang rapists.

  157. 157
    raven says:

    They don’t ask how they ask how many.

  158. 158
    raven says:

    @Dolly Llama: Auburn MSU is on the deuce.

  159. 159
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    90 yd touchdown by the Buckeyes, a QB controversy when Braxton Miller comes back.

  160. 160
    Captain Comrade says:

    I hate land alligators.

  161. 161
    Cassidy says:

    If you bring a vuvuzela to a sporting event, it should be legal to set you on fire.

  162. 162
    raven says:

    @efgoldman: I know a guy who went to South Africa for the World Cup and got a lip infection from blowing one!

  163. 163
    Cassidy says:

    @efgoldman: Why limit yourself to just one option?

  164. 164
    Scout211 says:


    Is that game on the tube somewhere?

    Transplanted Hawkeye am I.

  165. 165
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    Ohio State is smoking Cal, another Bomb by Kenny Guixton!

  166. 166
    raven says:

    @Scout211: Fox Sports 1

  167. 167
    Keith P says:

    I don’t know if my nerves can handle watching the fight tonight after sitting through the Bama-A&M game. I was already frazzled from Texans-Chargers. I may need to step away from sports for a while. I’m a big Auburn fan, but I’m not even watching that game today.

  168. 168
    Hill Dweller says:

    Why can’t Saban recruit a dominant pass rusher? He has always had good run stoppers, but they’ve never been able to consistently get any pressure on the QB without a blitz and/or stunt.

    Granted, they’re still winning National Championships, and this amounts to nitpicking, but his life would be much easier if his front four could consistently pressure the QB.

  169. 169
    Scout211 says:



    I’ve never heard of that channel, but there it was, right on my Dish menu.

  170. 170
    Alison says:

    @Scout211: Rather recently created, I believe.

    My dad only went to Cal for one year but that plus living in the Bay Area I feel inclined to root for them, so this is a rather painful beginning…

  171. 171
    piratedan says:

    @Hill Dweller: sorry, I won’t shed a tear if Bama can’t buy.. er recruit a dominant pass rusher… cripes, your guys had to get on the plane for the first time in two years, don’t be so bleeping traumatized…. //

  172. 172
    Dolly Llama says:

    Another week, another big bowl of nothing special from Jadeveon Clowney.

  173. 173
    Keith P says:

    I’m sure you’ll still hear people telling you that regardless of how mediocre he plays, he’s still a monster, or that he had a great game because he got double-teamed all game.

  174. 174

    Go Cocks! My fondest memories of grad school were tailgating before the football games in the shadow of the stadium in Columbia.

  175. 175
    Yatsuno says:

    @Cassidy: I see zero reason why the options should be mutually exclusive. And I may never forgive South Africa for foisting those upon the world.

  176. 176
    Dolly Llama says:

    @Keith P: The people who handicap the NFL draft don’t listen to that shit.

  177. 177
    The Dangerman says:

    @Dolly Llama:

    Another week, another big bowl of nothing special from Jadeveon Clowney.

    If memory serves (this many beers in, it’s questionable), he would have been the #1 pick in the draft, but he won’t be draft eligible until this year; he may be protecting himself after watching Lattimore ruin his payday.

  178. 178
    Hill Dweller says:

    @piratedan: I’m not an Alabama fan. Just wondering aloud.

  179. 179
    Dolly Llama says:

    @The Dangerman: If so, he may be “protecting himself” right out of the big-money rounds.

  180. 180
    The Dangerman says:

    @Dolly Llama:

    If so, he may be “protecting himself” right out of the big-money rounds.

    Nah, he’s a dead solid lock as #1 pick; apparently, his numbers that will come up at the combine are off the charts.

  181. 181
    SiubhanDuinne says:


    And I may never forgive South Africa for foisting those upon the world.

    Last summer (2012) we had a kind of local Commonwealth Games for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee. South Africa cheated in the egg-and-spoon race. We would have won, otherwise.

  182. 182
    Corner Stone says:

    @Dolly Llama: Ha! Top 10 pick unless he gets injured. Your hate sweetens his HGH protein shake each morning.

  183. 183
    Corner Stone says:

    Go Cocks!

  184. 184
    Dolly Llama says:

    @Corner Stone: His shit performance against the Bulldogs last week will sweeten every meal, drink and snack I’ll have the rest of the season.

  185. 185
    Corner Stone says:

    @Dolly Llama: Uh, OK. Good for you?
    He’s still a multimillionaire come next summer. How’s that taste?
    Does that put more food in your dawg bowl? Golf clap to you.

  186. 186
    Dolly Llama says:

    @Corner Stone: Tastes fine to me. How does Clowney’s dick taste? Your admiration of the man is clearly … extraordinary.

  187. 187
    Corner Stone says:

    @Dolly Llama: Wow. A player who will be a unanimous top 10 pick in the draft, and I’m out of line for saying he’s pretty good?
    Maybe you have a mirror in your place?
    You’re a fucking idiot for putting a career of tape on one or even two games.
    Seems you got an irrational hate on. Why do you hate so much, you fucking troll?

  188. 188
    Corner Stone says:

    Oh, and Go Cocks!

  189. 189
    Dolly Llama says:

    @Corner Stone:

    Seems you got an irrational hate on. Why do you hate so much, you fucking troll?

    I just heard so much about God, er, Clowney in the offseason that I guess I just expected to see a little more, that’s all. Have a great night!

  190. 190
    tybee says:

    well, free shoes won, penn state is losing to UCF, bama won (although i thought for a while i’d be able to annoy some friends who are tide fans).

    not a bad day.

    now let’s see how innovative atlanta can be while losing to the rams on the morrow.

  191. 191
    Corner Stone says:

    @Dolly Llama: As soon as I have Him in my tight embrace again tonight, I will.

  192. 192
    Dolly Llama says:

    @Corner Stone: The ironic thing about jawing with you about any of this is that tonight’s probably the only night this year I’ll actually be pulling for the Ol’ Ball Sack’s team. Normally I’d be cheering for Vanderbilt, but I can’t bring myself to pull for a coach who would play a guy that, at the very least, aided and abetted a bunch of coke-addled gang rapists. So, yeah, go ‘Cocks, I guess. You personally can still go fuck yourself, though. Have a great night!

  193. 193
    Corner Stone says:

    @Dolly Llama: Trolling, trolling, trolling…keep those dawgies trolling, rawhide!
    Thanks, honeybuns.

  194. 194

    Recipe wanted.

    Let me know if you’ve got one.

  195. 195
    Joseph Nobles says:

    @efgoldman: OK, so an over/under bet would be based on that 65 number; and if you had put some serious cash on Over 15, you would be swimming in green right about now?

  196. 196
    Betsy says:

    @Moonbatting Average: fucking Florida, always got to be pulling shit like that

  197. 197
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Southern Beale: I’ve sent out the bat signal to my cousin, expert and arbiter of all things grilled, smoked, and BBQ’d. Will respond on your blog when I hear from him. Or he may reply directly — I sent him link to your blog.

  198. 198
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    One word:


    I apologize for the uniforms, which is now obligatory for all DuckU alumni.

  199. 199
    raven says:

    Well, the Illini weren’t embarrassed.

  200. 200
    tybee says:

    @Southern Beale:

    i start from here and tweak a bit depending on what i want as a finished productL

    1/4 cup brown sugar
    1/4 cup paprika
    2 Tablespoons coarse kosher salt
    1 teaspoon ground cumin
    3 Tablespoon garlic powder
    1 Tablespoon black pepper
    1 1/2 teaspoons paprika
    1 Tablespoon cayenne pepper

    run it through a grinder.
    rub critter with it.

  201. 201
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @tybee: Man, that sounds awesome. I think i’ll tell my cousin not to bother. (I think i’ll share this with him, in fact.)

  202. 202
    tybee says:

    dunno why i have paprika listed twice but the quarter cup is correct.

  203. 203
    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN) says:

    @raven: Kill has been diagnosed with epilepsy. So having a seizure during a game isn’t really a surprise, particularly since stress is one of the triggers. It played out very differently today than it did the first couple of times he had one while he was here. He and the rest of the staff here have decided that it’s something that’s going to happen from time to time and they should just prepare for it.

    They spent a *lot* of time talking to the team about it so that they didn’t panic like they did two years ago. The medical staff went to help him, the alterations in the chain of authority were predetermined and the team pretty much just went back to work. The party line is that it just isn’t a big deal and that certainly seemed to be borne out by the way they handled it.

    The big event of the day was the women’s hockey team getting their national championship rings between the first and second quarter. That’s the only reason I went.

  204. 204
    Yatsuno says:

    @tybee: My druthers would be to add in coriander where that second paprika is in that amount. But as with all things YMMV.

  205. 205
    BruinKid says:

    The ending to the Wisconsin-Arizona State game was just… bizarre.

  206. 206
    tybee says:


    i fired up the server this morn and checked the original document. that second helping of paprika is not in the original.


    coriander is good but i have a person or two that i feed occasionally that don’t like cilantro in any form or fashion.
    i’ve also used oregano or rosemary in that basic mix.
    i quadruple the recipe and keep that in an airtight jar so i can get out the quantity i need and then mix in the other ingredients…curries, ginger, more hot peppers, etc.

  207. 207
    nemesis says:

    @Hill Dweller: pass rushing sacks arent a requirement of Sabans defenses. The main thrust is to effect the QB by getting him to move his feet. Causes lots of poor throws. Plus the Bama noseguard is designed to be huge (350 lbs) and occupy two offensive linemen, which leads to lesspass rush push up the middle.

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