Bankster, Bankster, That’s What They’re Yellin!

I’m changing my name to the First Bank of John Cole so I can rob people on vacation, have the charges dropped, and then tell the victim to fuck right off:

Katie Barnett, a resident of MacArthur, OH, claims that a bank she doesn’t belong to broke into her house while she was on vacation and either took or destroyed most of her possessions. First National Bank in Wellston had meant to foreclose and repossess a house across the street and blames its GPS for the mix-up.

Barnett says she has since presented the president of the bank with an $18,000 estimate to compensate her for the loss, but he has refused to pay her. “He got very firm with me and said, ‘We’re not paying you retail here, that’s just the way it is,’” she told 10TV News. The bank president told 10TV that it is trying to come to terms with Barnett. The bank did not respond to ThinkProgress’s request for comment.

Barnett called the police after the incident, but the police told her the case was closed just weeks later.

I wish I could say this was unbelievable. Oh, also too, this.

America, Fuck Yeah!

*** Update ***

Video removed because for some reason it is autoplaying and I have better things to do than deal with whiny emails all night. It didn’t autoplay in Firefox or Chrome, but apparently some of you wankers still use IE.

52 replies
  1. 1
    Yatsuno says:

    Sounds like a good test case for corporate personhood. If a bank can break and enter a home and cause damage, then they can go to jail for it right?

    (HA! I slay me!)

  2. 2
    Jebediah says:

    What are her prospects with a civil suit?

  3. 3
    Baud says:

    @Jebediah:

    Very good.

  4. 4

    It’s not about a salary it’s all about non-reality.

  5. 5

    Step 1, tell your story to every local news outlet there is (tv, newspapers, radio) step 2, get yourself a good lawyer and sue to the pants off the bank, step 3, go to a jury trial where every member of the jury pool remembers seeing on tv where a bank fucked up and stole all of a persons stuff because of a GPS screw up. Step 4, PROFIT!

  6. 6
    Ted & Hellen says:

    Yay!

    Can we talk about how five years after the financial meltdown, under the Obama administration and DOJ, all the big banks are sitting prettier and bigger than ever and how their executives are scraping more than ever off the top for themselves and share holders?

    Can we? Can we?

    Racist!

  7. 7
    TaMara (BHF) says:

    Saw this earlier today. My favorite part is the big lie the bank CEO posted on their website.

    The balls on this guy and his advisers.

  8. 8
    Gex says:

    This is where stand your ground laws could be most useful. If the banksters come for your home, just shoot them. They terrify me.

  9. 9
    max says:

    Shouldn’t that be a middle finger?

    max
    [‘I mean, since it’s for bankers.’]

  10. 10
    piratedan says:

    gee, she should sic the insurance company on them, that would be popcorn worthy to watch that in court.

    might as well sue the police too, since they know who the culprits are and never made an arrest.

  11. 11
    Citizen_X says:

    @TaMara (BHF): You know, I could believe his tale about a homeowner trying to (apparently) defraud them, but his “the GPS made us go there” story stinks to high heaven. They couldn’t check the address on the house, the mailbox, the neighbor’s houses? The numbers just change randomly from one side of the street to the other? Bullshit.

  12. 12

    We have a case currently where the homeowner had a first mortgage and a HELOC. The first mortgage was foreclosed upon, and the house was sold in the foreclosure process. It was sold for way over the first mortgage price and there was an excess which is currently being held by the Clerk of Court. The HELOC holder is suing to recover all of the excess funds, despite the fact that the excess funds far exceed the amount of the HELOC. HELOC is 11K, HELOC holder is suing for 23K. Luckily for us the HELOC attorney is a total and utter incompetent and doesn’t know how to a) draft pleadings, b) serve defendants and c) file notifications of service on defendants. The Clerk of Court is so pissed off at this guy right now that she has dismissed his lawsuit twice and he is trying a third time. Guess who the HELOC holder is? Bank of America, and they don’t have the resources to hire a semi-competent attorney.

  13. 13
    Steeplejack says:

    Autoplay alert on that video!

    Fix it, put it below the fold or be prepared for endless bitching.

    ETA: Please just fix it. I don’t want to have to nip it every goddamn time I refresh this thread.

  14. 14
    Lavocat says:

    Burglary? Check. Grand Larceny? Check. Criminal Trespass? Check. Criminal Mischief? Check. Criminal Tampering? Check. Criminal Possession of Stolen Property? Check. Misconduct by a Corporate Official? Check.

    And yet NO charges were filed against this fucking bank!!!???

    Fuck a simple civil suit.

    I’d go the whole hog and rip these motherfuckers’ throats out on a violation of civil rights action.

    Don’t wanna pay retail, huh?

    Yeah, well, I guess we’ll just call it even at a cool million.

    Douchebags.

  15. 15
    srv says:

    With Larry Summers at the Fed and Jacob “Dodd-Frank dealt with too-big-to-fail” Lew at Treasury, we’ve got nowhere to go but up.

    In smoke.

  16. 16
    kc says:

    First National Bank in Wellston had meant to foreclose and repossess a house across the street and blames its GPS for the mix-up.

    That seems bizarre. I haven’t heard of a bank using GPS coordinates to identify a property on which it has a mortgage.

  17. 17
    NotMax says:

    The banks have to get those toasters they give away from somewhere.

  18. 18
    JPL says:

    @kc: They could have blamed Google map, so just be happy and admit that mistakes happen…

    also, too.. when 911 makes that mistake, the repubs will want to privatize that..

  19. 19
    kc says:

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    That sounds like grounds for sanctions against the lawyer.

  20. 20
    kc says:

    @TaMara (BHF):

    Oh, I see now. It was the homeowner’s fault, ’cause her lawn wasn’t mowed.

  21. 21
    John Cole says:

    @Steeplejack: It isn’t autoplaying for me in firefox or chrome.

  22. 22
    kdaug says:

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    Step 1, tell your story to every local news outlet there is (tv, newspapers, radio), step 1b, get your story to go viral on FB and random intertron tubes, step 2, get yourself a good lawyer and sue to the pants off the bank, step 3, go to a jury trial where every member of the jury pool remembers seeing on tv where a bank fucked up and stole all of a persons stuff because of a GPS screw up. Step 4, PROFIT!

  23. 23
    kdaug says:

    @John Cole: Me either. FFX 22.0

  24. 24
    Shalimar says:

    @Ted & Hellen: Holy crap, T&H has come close to being on-topic with his anti-Obama ranting. I’m going to bed early before I drink myself into oblivion.

  25. 25
    Cassidy says:

    @Shalimar: Give it a minute. It’ll say something incredibly bigoted or defend a pedophile or talk shit about the blah people for having the audacity to seek compensation for having their son murdered. At least we know it’s consistent in it’s douchebaggery.

  26. 26
    maya says:

    I always rooted for mister Potter to prevail over that goodie-two-shoe, handicapped ( he saved his bro boo-hoo), perpetual popularity contest contestant, George Bailey. The guy was just too saccharine for this earth and that goddam wino fairy should have let him drown.
    Potterville is America. Belt it out, Kate.

  27. 27
    different-church-lady says:

    So wait a minute: president of bank can’t figure out that $18k is probably less than a lawsuit would cost?

  28. 28
    Shalimar says:

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    Guess who the HELOC holder is? Bank of America, and they don’t have the resources to hire a semi-competent attorney.

    They have the resources, but they are so used to getting away with anything they want to do that it rarely matters. Thus, you end up with local VP’s idiot relative doing the job instead.

  29. 29
    different-church-lady says:

    @Steeplejack: What video?

    Oh, that’s right, I have the best technology ever invented: Flashblock!

  30. 30
    Starfish says:

    @John Cole: It’s autoplaying for me in Chrome Version 28.0.1500.71 on a Mac.

  31. 31
    01jack says:

    It autoplays for me, in Firefox and Chrome in Linux. I really wish somebody would figure this all out.

    Autoplay is about the only thing in the Internets that really, really peeves me. Ordinarily I just go away if I experience something annoying or uninteresting. But I gotta bitch about this.

    Now I’ll go away. Give it enough time to get pushed below the front page.

  32. 32
    Violet says:

    @TaMara (BHF): From that letter from the bank president:

    When our representatives arrived, they noted that the grass was overgrown, the door was unlocked, and the utilities had been turned off. The home was also nearly empty, with two dressers being the only furniture inside the premises, and a neighbor indicated that the home had been vacant for some time.

    What’s the homeowner saying about this? The door was unlocked? The utilities had been turned off? She says she was on vacation? Someone’s lying and if it’s the bank president, he’s now said it in print.

  33. 33
    JustRuss says:

    Oh of course, the GPS screwed up. Yeah. As I said in the next thread about this, these douches just can’t admit to making a mistake. Also too, apparently the houses in MacArthur, OH don’t have street numbers on them. Big business opportunity for somebody there.

  34. 34
    Ted & Hellen says:

    @Cassidy:

    I remain flattered by your stalking me, Closet Cassy, but if you won’t call me I can’t help you come out and do right by yourself and everyone in your life.

    Be brave!

  35. 35
    Steeplejack says:

    @John Cole:

    Firefox 22.0 on WinXP here. Still autoplaying.

  36. 36
    Steeplejack says:

    @Cole:

    It didn’t autoplay in Firefox or Chrome, but apparently some of you wankers still use IE.

    Thanks for fixing it, but fuck you for the gratuitous—and demonstrably false—browser dig. You of all people should not be pretending that FYWP is some paragon of consistency. This is the first video that has autoplayed for me in quite a while.

    And, yeah, let’s totally rule out blogger error. That could never happen.

  37. 37
    RSA says:

    First National Bank in Wellston had meant to foreclose and repossess a house across the street and blames its GPS for the mix-up.

    So sue the GPS maker–oops, EULAs don’t allow for that. I wonder if it’s a reproducible error?

    I do like the First Bank of John Cole, but I don’t think you need to go even that far. Following the same rules, I can tell my friends to feel free to come into my house and take my stuff while I’m out. Any unoccupied house in my neighborhood becomes fair game.

    Of course, my friends aren’t banks, so they probably wouldn’t receive equal justice from the police.

  38. 38
    different-church-lady says:

    @Violet:

    When our representatives arrived, they noted that the grass was overgrown, the door was unlocked, and the utilities had been turned off. The home was also nearly empty, with two dressers being the only furniture inside the premises, and a neighbor indicated that the home had been vacant for some time.

    “Our representatives then went across the street and attempted to repossess Ms. Barnett’s home instead. This was an error, but what are you gonna do? Shit happens and it flows downhill.”

  39. 39
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    @John Cole: It autoplayed on Chrome on Win8. While I prefer IE in general, I use Chrome for this site.

  40. 40
    NotMax says:

    @BillinGlendaleCA

    While I prefer IE in general

    Speechless.

  41. 41
    stinger says:

    Insulting someone by implying they are gay is so ’00s.

  42. 42
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Violet: Did the bank go to and fuck with the wrong house? If so, it is really just a question of how much the damages should be. Plus the punitives.

  43. 43
    RepubAnon says:

    Burglary’s a specific intent crime – you have to enter the property of another with the intent of committing a further crime once there. These guys can use the “good heart, weak mind” defense for burglary, as they can believably claim they didn’t intend to steal anything, they were simply stupid enough to believe a GPS without double-checking the physical address.

    However, there are undoubtedly some general intent crimes available here – I’d mention misfeasance in office to the police department as well, for failing to charge anyone with anything.

    This case cries out for some ambitious attorney to take the case pro bono, and clean that bank out. The publicity would be priceless.

  44. 44
    NotMax says:

    @stinger

    Thus it is naughty?

    (quickly ducks behind something sturdy)

  45. 45
    stinger says:

    @NotMax: LOL I was thinking it was zero, empty, nuthin’, zip zilch loserville nowt, but yours is better.

  46. 46
    mainmati says:

    Has any one of us actually contacted Katie Barnett with these great suggestions? I doubt she subscribes to BJ. Maybe she’s already lawyered up and has filed a civil case but it might be worth a reach-out from this excellent community to let her know there is an online supportive community out there.

  47. 47
  48. 48
    Debbie(aussie) says:

    Why in the name of all that is holey should this woman need to get a lawyer. They broke so many laws it is not funny. What ever happened to bad publicity. When you are rich/run a bank, don’t count.
    Sometimes it seems like we live on another planent. Not just on the underside of the same:)

  49. 49
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Debbie(aussie): The only way she is going ensure that she gets a fair shake from the bank is if there is a lawsuit or the threat of a law suit. To do that properly, the lady needs an lawyer.

  50. 50
    Larv says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    This is what I don’t get. The bank is getting pissy because they think the woman is trying to get one over on them And yes, she probably is vastly overstating the value of the items. $9000 seems a lot for a couple of car engines, unless we’re talking new, crated engines. But the actual value is pretty much irrelevant. What the bank doesn’t seem to get that they’d still be getting off cheap given the magnitude of the error. No matter what was in the house, failing to check the address of the property you’re repoing and stripping is at least a $20,000 dollar error. In a trial, I suspect any jury in the country would assign at least that much in punitive damages. Not to mention the vastly greater amount of PR damage this will do to the bank. They should have happily ponied up the 18 grand and had her sign a nondisclosure agreement.

  51. 51
    mainmati says:

    Hello, I deal with GPS and GIS all the time. This is elementary. BOA is the quintessence of bullsh#t. We’re talking about rank incompetence.

  52. 52
    Crissa says:

    In my neighborhood the numbers are neither sequential nor do they have any relation to the side of the street. That’s mountain living for you. So I totally can understand the bank’s position.

    However, they really should have evidence of the stuff and conditions, not just a list.

    I really wish I was able to get the bank that forclosed on the property next door to admit to anything – they just said ‘oh that was the realtor’s person’ ‘oh that was the other bank’ when a couple of their moving vans backed into my steps and broke them.

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