I couldn’t fall asleep until about 6 am and then woke up at nine, but I have spent the better part of the day lying with the dogs under the sheets with the covers pulled over my head in what could accurately be described as a dutch oven of grief. I called the folks to see how they are doing, and dad answered mom’s cell because she is racing him to the hospital because he somehow almost cut his finger off cleaning the bottom of the dishwasher. And no, I have no idea how he did it, but as you can see the entire family has this gift of bizarre injuries.
I’ve never wanted a Monday to get here faster.
aimai
John, I’m just so sorry you are going through this and that wherever you look right now things look horrible and bleak. Can you take the dogs for a walk? Can you head down to the local shelter and get someone else to take care of–not to replace the unreplaceable but to distract you from your grief? I have grieved loved ones and I have grieved pets–albeit a long time ago for the pets–and you just have to get up again and start living for those you need to be living for. It sounds like monday is your self imposed deadline for that so I’m not going to say you have to get out of bed a moment earlier but honestly? you will feel better if you do. head down to the hospital and hold your mother’s hand and what’s left of your fathers. You will feel better.
SiubhanDuinne
“Dutch oven of grief” is brilliant. And yes, the last couple of days have combined to make an awful terrible horrible no-good very-bad suckitudinous weekend. Your girls are there for you, and I’m glad of that.
I thought your dad already cut his finger off. Not to make light of a scary and potentially serious injury, but is this an annual event with him?
RaflW
Of the Dutch oven of grief helps you get through this Sunday, stay abed as long as you need. But eat some decent nutritious food and take a long, girly bath.
Keep being kind to yourself and yer lovable dogs and time will pass and Monday will be some small increment better.
spudgun
@SiubhanDuinne: I know, right? I was thinking the same thing…I think the last time was a circular saw? Something like that.
Anyway, John – just sending big hugs your way.
Emerald
Glad you got some sleep at least, and the doggies are sticking by you (we knew they would).
This isn’t the worst weekend I’ve ever experienced, but damn, it’s close.
We’re all with you, John. I hope it helps. Keep blogging. We care, and we need it too! (Anyway, I do)
chopper
man I am so sorry John. This whole weekend is just shit all around
Jewish Steel
That dutch oven? My advice? Stay put til Monday.
kathy a.
hope your dad’s OK. give the girls a scritch for me.
Suzanne
Good Lord. What else can happen to you this weekend?!
I second Aimai and the others who recommend you get to the shelter and get yourself a new friend. Not to replace Tunch, as that is not possible. But to remind you that joy and life are constantly renewed.
Johannes
You’re in the hearts of the Brooklyn Navy Yard Cat Colony Crew, Cole. We’re donating, cherishing our little guys, and grieving for and with you.
different-church-lady
Belated condolences and strength.
My internet has been out since Friday night — I think Verizon was trying to save me from an entire weekend of shitty news.
Sister Inspired Revolver of Freedom
Hang tough. We’re here for you.
gogol's wife
@Jewish Steel:
I agree.
Mrs. Polly
Mr. Cole, I just turned on the computer after a long Trayvon Martin-centered night, and find this heartbreaking news. What to say except you have my every sympathy, and how grateful we are at Rumproast for your kindness when we were going through our own great shock?
I hope you can get some rest, and wish healing to you and all your family.
max
I called the folks to see how they are doing, and dad answered mom’s cell because she is racing him to the hospital because he somehow almost cut his finger off cleaning the bottom of the dishwasher.
Man, your dad is not real fond of his fingers is he? Between that and the woodchipper, that’s two and he’s in his what? 70’s? I’m surprised he still has *hands*!
max
[‘So, a cat. Near WV panhandle, is it?’]
The Other Chuck
As you’ve said, you’re German, so wouldn’t it be a Deutsch Oven? Har.
Anyway, it’s summer. Put on some sunscreen and deet and get outside. Indoors and alone is not where you need to be all day.
Josie
Everyone has a different timetable for grieving and healing, John. You will find yours by taking good care of your pets and family and yourself. I wish there was a way to take away the pain, but we are helpless to do that. I’m sure you realize that hundreds of us care about you and yours and that we wish you the best.
Mandarama
I haven’t been here in some time, but my sister sent me this horrible news…dear God, John, I’m beyond sorry. I wish I could do anything or say anything that would help, and I know I can’t. I can just tell you that I have my old original Tunch t-shirt, and I’ve felt so much affection for him and for you over the last five years. Your love and sorrow are shared by many.
Mystical Chick
Not to pimp my blog because I know the woo doesn’t totally resonate with this crowd but I wanted to share a post I wrote this morning about losing Tunch and the love and support of this wonderful community for John – someone most of us only know from his words (and few pictures).
(It was my way of paying tribute to JC and T.)
Quoting a bit:
“And EIGHT HUNDRED PEOPLE left him comments, condolences and helped him carry his grief. Not only because we had come to know Tunch through John’s stories on the blog but we had come to see John’s heart reflected in those same stories.
When someone shows you their heart, hold it in your hands gently. As those eight hundred people did.
Behind every single word on a screen sits someone who has loved and lost, like John has.
Behind every single comment left on a blog sits someone reaching out in the only way they can.
To comfort.
To care.
To hold close by their words.”
Emerald
Obviously, John, only you know how much you can face at one time, but even if you only fostered a kitteh for awhile, it certainly would take the edge off the pain you’re feeling, having another little soul to take care of. Just having something to do temporarily for an abandoned kitteh, not replacing Tunch (which is impossible).
When my kitteh Windy died, I adopted Emerald the very next morning. I did that because I’d seen Emerald at the Pet Smart (Humane Society adoption). She’d been adopted but returned because she could’t get along with a dog. I told her I’d take her home except that my Windy would be with us for some weeks yet. When I came home, Windy was hemorrhaging, so I had to rush her to the vet and do the right thing. She’d been sick for months.
So the next day I kept my promise and now I have Emerald, who loves me completely, although she’s a totally different kitteh. I’ve never regretted doing that.
So that’s an option for sometime in the near future for you, I hope.
And if not, we’re all here with ya.
JenJen
Never has a weekend been more suck-filled. We’re all just drained and devastated.
Take care of yourself, take comfort in your friends, take plenty of time, and go ahead and cry.
Nicole
I hope your dad is okay. And I’m glad the dogs are taking care of you. Your account last night of Rosie not leaving you alone made me remember my pet schnauzer from childhood. When my mom was dying of cancer, during the times my mom was able to be at home, Cindy planted herself under my mom’s bed and wouldn’t leave her post for love nor money (and she and my mom were previously rivals for my dad’s affection). Terriers, I tell ya. Impossible brats, but they really do come through when the chips are down. Cindy has been gone 25 years (five fewer than my mom) and I still see both of them in my dreams sometimes.
(Look, no judgments about my naming the dog Cindy, okay? It was the 70’s)
Mj_Oregon
Grief is a monstrous tidal wave within the soul. Endure the pain as best you can. I am, as are so many others, with you in spirit and we offer our own tears in tribute to Tunch’s memory.
Emerald
@Mystical Chick: That’s a really lovely entry, Mystical. Not woo at all, just heartfelt.
dedc79
John, ever read the book My Family and Other Animals? It’s put a smile on my face during dome very sad times and I think, if nothing else, it might serve as a good distraction for you.
Quinerly
Keep blogging. Big hugs from me, Leo, the cheese loving dog; Ivan, reclusive kitty; and John Lennon, fearless rescue kitty. My heart breaks for you.
Stillwater
@Mystical Chick: What you wrote there? THAT is awesome. It’s what makes this whole carnival ride go round and round and ever upward.
Mystical Chick
@Emerald: Thanks, Emerald. (My woo is of the practical sort, I’d like to think.)
@Stillwater: It just sort of came out (most of my writing is like that – I only have the vaguest of ideas and then fingers to keys and it rolls on out). Thank you for the nice words.
Ol Froth
I just saw the news. I am so, so very sorry to read of your loss. It never is easy.
JPL
John, The dutch oven sounds like the best cure right now. In fact you certainly are allowed to sit shiva. The Jewish community had that right. Mourning takes time.
Last night I received a not from Marc and the donations were pouring in for Tunch.
Mike S
I know the feeling John. I have lost family, friends and pets. By far the hardest for me were the pets. Those were the times when getting out of bed was the hardest. I think it is because you can tell your family and friends how much you care about them and they can respond. Pets don’t respond with I love you too. But never doubt that Tunch loved you too. You spoiled him like a billionaire spoils his mistress so how could he not love you. I’m betting that he even started bringing you “gifts” when you started letting him out just to show you how much he loved you.
Ivan X
I don’t know you personally John, and I don’t even post here very often, and yet hearing about Tunch was shocking, enough that I actually said something to my partner about it: that the mascot of a blog I read, the dearest friend of its creator, was dead, and I just felt so terrible for him. And I do. That can’t do anything to make you feel better, and I wouldn’t even attempt to try. I just feel for you. And I don’t even have a pet. I guess it says something about how affectingly you have shared what and who is important to you with your readers.
SG
Oh, John, this is just the weekend of cosmic suck. Yet, this too shall pass. It’s an overused cliche, but that’s because it’s true. Tomorrow will come, and the day after that, and the raw edge of this pain will start to dull. Hang in there, big guy. Hug Lily and Rosie at every opportunity.
c u n d gulag
Man, talk about your bad week getting even worse!
I hope Monday comes quickly for you, John, and things get better.
Stay well, and know we love you, Chub’s! ;-)
We’re here for ya!!!
Laura C
Man, I spent a bunch of the day in bed crying about Tunch, and I never met him. (And I’m not a cryer.) You have to give yourself more crying-in-bed time than people who only read about him on the internet!
I’m going to dissent, though, from the people saying to go get another cat now. Soon, but not yet. Give yourself a little time, and start looking when your eyes are a little less filled with tears.
max
@Suzanne: I second Aimai and the others who recommend you get to the shelter and get yourself a new friend. Not to replace Tunch, as that is not possible. But to remind you that joy and life are constantly renewed.
B-9 “Snowbell”: “Domestic Short Hair – Buff And White: An adoptable cat in Triadelphia, WV [that would be the Ohio County animal shelter at 304-547-1013] – Medium • Senior • Female – Snowbell is 12 years old, but still full of life!! She is spayed and declawed already and very friendly.” I am personally down on declawing, tail-bobbing and ear-cropping since it strikes me as callous at best and sadistic at worst, but the cat didn’t do it. At any rate, around here, the adoption rate at the shelter for dogs is 78% and for cats is 26%. Of course, that adoption rate skews in favor of puppies and kittens, so someone her age is probably a much longer shot. So she ain’t got too much time left on this earth, unless someone adopts her.
So there’s that.
max
[‘Well, that took almost two minutes.’]
SiubhanDuinne
@Mystical Chick: Lovely tribute — to Cole, to Tunch, to community.
I’m glad to know about your website.
Haydnseek
I’m sitting in my favorite chair with my cat in my lap. She’s doing that stretch/purr thing that she does so well. I’m blubbering like a child. I’ve never known a life without at least one cat in it (my parents loved them) and I’m 61 years old. I love them beyond all reason, and they have loved me back tenfold. I feel your pain, John, because I’ve been there. I feel like I know you, and Tunch, and as I skritch my sweet Raeline in that special spot under her chin, I grieve. For you, for me, and all of us who were ever consumed by our love for our furry companions. But we keep coming back. We may go to a shelter, we may pluck a kitten out of a cardboard box manned by a ten year old in front of the grocery store. (I’ve done both.) But we always come back. Because the love is always stronger than the loss. You’re a good man, Cole, because you can love through the pain. I’m gonna give Raeline some fresh Mahi-Mahi, and I’ll be thinking of you and Tunch when I do. Good on ya, Cole.
Bill E Pilgrim
Hey John,
Not around much anymore (RL intrudes) but I just wanted to say I’m really sorry, that sucks. My brother just lost his favorite cat and he said he never remembered being so heartbroken in his life. This is someone well past your age who’s had no shortage of relationships of human and non-human kinds, some very long ones.
I also want to bid farewell to General Stuck. I made a lighthearted snark several years ago that included something about “the kind of thread where Stuck is threatening to punch someone by the end of it” or whatever it was, and he showed up and laughed, said he didn’t realize he was so famous. He made a point in that same exchange, and I always remembered this, of saying that he liked me, using exactly that word, despite the fact that we didn’t agree on much. It was a completely disarming comment and, in no small part because of it, the feeling was mutual.
JPL
John, Tamara posted this during the three hours while you were sleeping. Since it captured a lot of our feelings,
I posting it again without permission, I might add.
You may not be able to absorb it all in the moment, John Cole, but what an amazing amount of love is flowing to you from this crazy community of cyber souls…………………………………………………………………………………
Thinking about it, we’re kind of like Rosie. We jumped in your car when you stopped, we’re unruly and hard to tame, but in the end, when you need us, we’re here for you.
Elizabelle
“dutch oven of grief.”
John: as others have mentioned, even when you are prostrate with a whacking personal loss, you are still a damn fine writer.
RE your father: I was thinking: how many digits does that man have left?
No way over this loss but through it.
Wishing you and your family peace and comfort. Wishing I lived close enough to subject you to a casserole. (Be glad for the distance.)
Ruckus
I’ve had a number of bad weekends over the years but the worst was probably the weekend of my mom’s memorial. I will not go into details but with the confluence of events that crappy weekend which ended in my grand ole dog biting my hand, that was rock bottom. But I’m still here, breathing in and out, heart pumping(OK mostly), and everything sort of working.
It gets easier, we get used to the pain, we get to understand the pain. Not embrace it, just understand it. I’m not sure that’s always so but it has been my experience so far. I’m encouraged by a man I knew who lived to 105. He outlived two wives, and things that should have killed him numerous time and still had a spirit of life that was unbeatable.
Laura
Are you by any chance related to a John Cole who worked at BBN in MA, now retired? He hasn’t been responding to emails from some old friends who have grown concerned….
Sibling Nonspecific Firearm of Random Adjective Followed by a Noun That Describes a Mental State (fka AWS)
as if Monday doesn’t suck.
Brian
John- I commented the other night. As I said at the time, long time lurker…etc. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that your blog has gotten me through some of the toughest times of my life. I check in a couple times a day. I know at my lowest I always found comfort in cooking…I know your joy when you create a great meal. Just a suggestion. We all grieve differently and staying in bed might be the best route for your day. But getting up and doing something creative might help…
My thoughts are with you.
-BK
TrishB
John, please buy and consume something like Ensure and Gatorade. It seems silly, but when in grief, at least keep some minimum of nutrition going.That was all I could do when my ex announced a desire for divorce. Food wouldn’t stay in my system, so this helped. the first day or so after the pronouncement, I could barely think straight. After that, I downed three each of Ensure and Gatorade a day for 3 days until I could answer the phone and sound like a semi-coherent person. (Shhh, don’t mention the wine, but yeah, that was there, too)
This all brought to you from the wench who had the “wrong” reaction when the ex announced divorce. I pointed to the pups, and said “Well fine, but I’m keeping them!”
dance around in your bones
John, I’m amazed that you even have the energy to post on your blog. It went down today for a bit (no doubt from the outpouring of sympathetic comments) and I thought oh gawd, he’s pulling the plug (on the blog, not – you know).
And for everyone who is kindly suggesting getting another kitty or cat right away? I remember when my beloved calico got run over and some well-meaning person suggested the same thing (along with a lecture about the cat being outside) and I just about wanted to strangle her. I was grieving, for chrissakes, not in any mood to consider another kitty.
You’ll get (or not get) another cat when the time is right for you and not a minute before.
I know everyone is well-meaning but jeez – it’s so individual for every person. This is said in loving kindness for everyone so please don’t take it as a criticism.
Suzanne
@JPL: I always refer to those people who are there for you when the shit hits the fan as “foul-weather friends”. They are priceless beyond rubies.
YellowJournalism
Yeah, this weekend can get over real soon. Haven’t had that thought in a long time.
I know everyone means well by encouraging John to go out and find another furry friend in need, but it sounds to me like the best thing would be to let John warm up his Dutch oven with his grief today and let him decide the time to move on and maybe open his home to another furry friend. I know if it was me (and at one time in my life it was), going to a shelter would be the last thing on my mind. The suggestion actually filled me with more grief and guilt when it was made to me.
Angela
@JPL: TaMara’s comment said it all for me too.
Thanks for checking in John. Grief has its way with us. As I said before, if I lived closer, I would be dropping off some food for you.
Taking care of yourself while grieving is an art. And you will know what you need. Still sitting with you, as best we can, from afar.
JenJen
@Bill E Pilgrim: It’s good to see you here again! I mostly lurk these days. Nothing like the passing of our beloved Tunch to bring us out of the shadows. :-(
Tara the Antisocial Social Worker
Dear Universe:
ENOUGH with the crapping on the Cole family already!
Thank you.
Love,
Tara
gbear
I’m going to counter some of the advice above and say DON’T get a new kitty right away and especially not a foster kitty. Wait until your head is clear. Wait until the new cat you bring in to your house doesn’t have anything to with your memories of Tunch (I’m not in any way saying forget about Tunch, just start the new kitty with a clean slate). I’m really glad that you’re considering a senior cat.They tend to get overlooked at the shelters. Two of my three shelter adoptions were over 5 years old.
Staying in bed all day today seems like a perfectly reasonable reaction to how horrible yesterday was. I’m really glad that you’re checking in here, and I hope your dad will be OK. Take care.
WereBear
This cat mourning article seems pertinent:
After a loss, how long before we get a new cat?
It is, of course, an individual issue.
phoebes-in-santa fe
You guys know that “Tunch” is the second huge cat the liberal blogging community has lost lately. Last year Kevin Drum and his wife Marian over at Mother Jones lost their wonderful boy,” Inkblot”. That cat made “Tunch” look like a kitteh. He also wandered away from home and was found dead in their So Cal neighborhood.
“Inkblot” and his sister “Domino” were always shown in “Friday Cat Blogging”; now it’s only “Domino”. I felt as bad about “Inkblot’s” death as I’m feeling about “Tunch’s” death.
I’m typing this on my bed and my 7 year old rescue tabby, “Alice Obama” (or “Alley O” for short) is balanced on my hip. Her 4 year old rescue brother Tuxie, “Robin Obama” are the lights of my life. (Sons and granddaughter live half a country away)
As I wrote earlier, Cole should take the two dogs out to “Tunch’s” grave. I think the dogs will recognise “Tunch” somehow. And it’s a slow process, recovering from losing a cat or dog. I’ve lost 5 during the course of my life. Whether it’s sudden death or death from illness, it’s very difficult and we all mourn in our own ways.
Both “Inkblot” and “Tunch” live on – immortalised forever in the liberal blog world. And that’s good.
sw
John, I know this may sound crazy and like the last thing you need right now, but you need a kitten. Not a cat but a kitten. I lost my long time feline companion Jesse in May after sixteen years and was pretty much inconsolable. I still find myself weeping at inappropriate moments and for a late middle age badass like myself it is somewhat embarrassing. But there is something about the nature of a kitten, the way they find wonder in every little thing the whole world this amazing new experience that just draws you in and you can’t help but have that edge taken off the raw hurt you are feeling now. It is the only thing I have found that really helps. I am old enough for this to be the second time I have gone through this and it really works when nothing else does. Besides, there are a million kittens that need homes. Find one that sort of looks like the big guy and and it won’t be hard to believe that he is dropping in on you to see how you are.
Tom Levenson
John: crossed out a couple of messages. I keep remembering that words, no matter how well intentioned (or wonderful, in retrospect) are of variable use now. Do what works, take comfort when and as you can, and think about what comes next some other time. Good thoughts in MA flowing WV way.
the Conster
For what it’s worth, Mercury is in retrograde which fucks all your shit up, and all of this together is some fucked up shit. I for one have seen enough bullshit, pain and sorrow to last a lifetime.
WereBear
On a personal note, I have spent decades in rescue and always have multiple cats. The other cats grieve when a cat is gone, and they do brighten up when a newcomer appears.
Personally, I see it as a life-affirming gesture.
I lost my Bubby thirteen years ago, at thirteen, and I still miss him and always will… as does his old friend, James Bond. But that has nothing to do with rescuing Reverend Jim and Olwyn and Tristan.
I see bringing a new cat into the home as a tribute and a memorial.
wmd
Let the girls comfort you. When Rosie starts to piss you off you’ll know that your on your way out of the darkness. I posted yesterday that she was going to surprise the hell out of you – you just need to let it happen.
As for another cat you will do it when you’re ready. Don’t let us commentors push you around, your heart will know just like it did with Lily.
Princess Leia
@Tara the Antisocial Social Worker: Exactly.
raven
There are not many Deadheads here but I thought this clip from the restored 72 Dead show in Oregon playing China Cat Sunflower was appropriate.
Look for awhile at the China Cat Sunflower
proud-walking jingle in the midnight sun
Copper-dome Bodhi drip a silver kimono
like a crazy-quilt stargown
through a dream night wind
Krazy Kat peeking through a lace bandana
like a one-eyed Cheshire
like a diamond-eye Jack
A leaf of all colors plays
a golden string fiddle
to a double-e waterfall over my back
smith
Thoughts and prayers go out to you today John. This is going to be a tough few days, hell weeks.
Losing a pet is hell. There are times I still tear up about my beloved dog who died 6 years ago. I never got another dog because it just hurts too much.
Violet
It is a terrible weekend. Hope your dad’s finger is okay. Your family does have a way with accidents. I can imagine your whole family is traumatized this weekend after what happened. Stay in your Dutch oven of grief as long as you need. Sounds like a great way to spend this Sunday.
khead
Do not play with fire in the Dutch oven.
Goblue72
*waves a terrible towel in silence*
Chat Noir
Been thinking about you since the terrible news last night. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for you, John. You grieve as much as you need while taking care of yourself and the girls. Sending virtual support your way though I wish it could be something more concrete to help you through this sad and painful time.
Haydnseek
@raven: Saw the Dead segue from China Cat Sunflower into Jack Straw. El Monte Legion Stadium. 1971? 72? Can’t remember the date. Don’t care. Unforgettable music. Yeah, here there be deadheads………we can share what we got of yours cuz we done shared all of mine…………If I had written that line, I could die happy.
CAfan
John Cole, you did not in any way “let Tunch down”, as you wrote recently. You kept that dog out of your house , you can’t be blamed that didn’t work. You took wonderful care of Tunch for 12 years, and gave him a huge number of well-wishers. It’s not your fault!
MikeInSewickley
John, I love this blog and everyone who work so hard to maintain it.
I go to other places for news as well and to see what the world is up to. But under your guidance, BJ is the only place I’ve ever found that so well combines real people problems while talking about the big world problems we face and need to work to correct.
But it still boils down to each one of us having to cope with life and cause change where we can.
BJ helps me get through the day so it’s normal that we are here to help you get through yours. Hang in there, hug the piglets close, and reach out to the community when you need to.
Gex
I hear you John. I have found weekends to be more difficult. I just have nothing but love and hugs for you. I’m so, so sorry. My heart aches for you and Tunch. And your family who must be equally traumatized.
I’m so sorry.
Nina-the-first
From NYC to WV: remembering, thinking, grieving, caring, and feeling such gratitude for what was, and will come as you (‘roll roll roll’), today in bed, and on Monday, we’ll see. Blessings to you and all your family.
Nina Simone Ooh child
kmeyerthelurker
John, I am so sorry for your loss. Remember that the pain you feel is testament to how truly you two were family. It’s pretty clear that there are a lot of people out there who love you (albeit many only virtually, but still), and that is also pretty awesome.
West of the Cascades
I’m wearing my t-shirt that says “Feed” on it today along with the image of your precious Tunch – probably thousands of people around the country are doing the same today and sending good thoughts your way. Wishing you all the comfort you can get from your girls and your family (and glad your Dad is OK) and from your Dutch oven of grief.
raven
@Haydnseek: This is apparently newly restored footage, I’ve got a good many concert vids but this is really clear. My favorite line for quite some time (since I went to a Wharf Rat get together in Charlotte) is “I can tell your future, just look what’s is your hand”.
Birthmarker
Sincere condolences to you and the pups. Just grieve in your own way. It’s all OK.
former lurker
Haven’t been on your site lately, but when I heard about Tunch via Tbogg, I just had to drop by to express my sympathy. Try to find some peace in knowing you gave him a wonderful life, but grieve as you need to.
raven
@Haydnseek: Of course right now:
See here how everything
lead up to this day
and it’s just like
any other day
that’s ever been
Sun goin up
and then the
sun it goin down
Shine through my window and
my friends they come around
come around
RandomMonster
Dutch Oven Of Grief would be a great band name.
So sorry for your loss, John. It’s hard to lose a friend and companion.
Amir Khalid
Take all the advice you’re getting here, including from me, with a pinch of salt. Let Lily and Rosie give you all the comfort they can. You’ll always be the best judge of when you’re ready to move on from mourning Tunch and recruit a new feline member into your household. And as you’ve seen these few days, out here on the Intertoobz you’ve got a great big support group that’s with you all the way.
MazeDancer
Losing any pet, but especially a first kitty like the magnificent Tunch, is devastating and flattening pain. It hasn’t even been a whole day. Stay down as deep as you need. Grieve as long as necessary. Weeks, months, whatever it takes. One day is no where near enough time, Mr Cole.
And listen to no one’s ideas but your own about any activities. (Including this post, too, of course.) Except to know that every “suggestion” is just the commenter’s way of expressing true, heartfelt care about you and the mighty Tunch.
Yatsuno
John, it’s rough. It get rougher. Then, slowly, it gets better. Uncle Joe said it best.
Haydnseek
@raven: Sometimes everything is shit. Sometimes it seems like it might be shit for the foreseeable future. But I take heart, cuz I know that the sun’s gonna shine in my back door someday………
Soprano2
It gets better, John, but the sadness never completely goes away. I’m ready for this year to be over, starting last September 15th I’ve lost my sister, her boyfriend and his three children in a small plane crash, a friend of my husband’s in a motorcycle accident, a friend’s husband of a pulmonary embolism, and a dog of 9 years to an undiagnosed heart tumor. Now this, I’ve cried a few tears over the death of a cat I’ve never met and in sympathy for the grief of a man I’ve never met, it’s strange but there it is. I’ve been depressed since I heard the news yesterday, I’ve had so much death in my life this year that any news of more hits me more than it usually would.
JPL
The first time John’s dad lost part of his finger was in a wood chipper and we showed such concern and now the comments have to do with how many fingers does he left. Somehow, I think your dad would understand.
Yatsuno
@efgoldman: CaseyL put up some pics on an earlier thread. Even though the mood was a bit somber we still had lots of drinks and good food and good times. An Psi wears his alcohol well I must say, though I don’t think we got enough into him.
Citizen_X
Here’s the bestest ever tribute to a departed pet, courtesy of Lord Byron:
Near this Spot
are deposited the Remains of one
who possessed Beauty without Vanity,
Strength without Insolence,
Courage without Ferosity,
and all the virtues of Man without his Vices.
This praise, which would be unmeaning Flattery
if inscribed over human Ashes,
is but a just tribute to the Memory of
BOATSWAIN, a DOG,
who was born in Newfoundland May 1803
and died at Newstead Nov. 18, 1808.
When some proud Son of Man returns to Earth,
Unknown to Glory, but upheld by Birth,
The sculptor’s art exhausts the pomp of woe,
And storied urns record who rests below.
When all is done, upon the Tomb is seen,
Not what he was, but what he should have been.
But the poor Dog, in life the firmest friend,
The first to welcome, foremost to defend,
Whose honest heart is still his Master’s own,
Who labours, fights, lives, breathes for him alone,
Unhonoured falls, unnoticed all his worth,
Denied in heaven the Soul he held on earth –
While man, vain insect! hopes to be forgiven,
And claims himself a sole exclusive heaven.
Oh man! thou feeble tenant of an hour,
Debased by slavery, or corrupt by power –
Who knows thee well must quit thee with disgust,
Degraded mass of animated dust!
Thy love is lust, thy friendship all a cheat,
Thy tongue hypocrisy, thy heart deceit!
By nature vile, ennobled but by name,
Each kindred brute might bid thee blush for shame.
Ye, who behold perchance this simple urn,
Pass on – it honors none you wish to mourn.
To mark a friend’s remains these stones arise;
I never knew but one — and here he lies.
raven
@Yatsuno: Are you the young fellow in the glasses?
JPL
@raven: which thread were the pictures on?
jenn
@Soprano2: Geez, that’s terrible. Sympathy and best wishes to you.
Yatsuno
@raven: The young fellow in the glasses is our esteemed guest. I’m in the gray sweatshirt at the end of the table.
WereBear
@Soprano2: That is terrible. I’m so sorry.
MomSense
Thank you for checking in, John. We have all been worrying about you. I’m glad your girls are by your side. Keeping you, the girls and your family in my thoughts.
raven
@JPL: Here
raven
@Yatsuno: Aha, nice to see you!
ruemara
Take it slow. It’s your grief and you have a right to mourn. If there’s one thing I’ve hated, it’s the idea that somehow you’re supposed to just pop back up, right as rain, as if someone you shared heart and hearth with wasn’t very important. Do what you need.
To get OT, I had an amazing bit of goodness in my life just now. A friend of mine not only delivered some much needed food (veggies are expensive, yo), but a camera. Nothing too fancy, but I can take pics and shoot video again. I feel like I have…worth. It’s not often I get a kindness like this, which is funny, because I’ve given away probably hundreds of dollars of photography over the years. And for those who were interested, here’s the full show, because I didn’t have room for all the pics hanging, so you get a better freebie than the cafe gallery.
Red Apple Smokes
I would just like to tell you that you have been in my thoughts, Mr. Cole. I’m basically a lurker, (commented once or twice under a different handle) but this community is helping me get through some of the toughest stuff I’ve ever been through (care giving for disabled parents while dealing with grad school and the accompanying poverty). The writers (yourself included) and commentators have challenged the way I think, in addition to providing countless hours of escape and levity. I am so sorry for your loss.
gogol's wife
@Citizen_X:
Cool.
SIA
Grief can make you tired and hungry. Sleep and eat. Take care of your body while your soul is desolated, so your body can sustain you. We are all with you, yet it has to be gone through alone. Healing blessings to all the Coles.
raven
@ruemara: You’re in Sacto huh?
bemused
@JPL:
We did jump in the car…Tamara captured this motley crew well.
SIA
@ruemara: OMG that is fantastic! Really good! Where is the show?
Patricia Kayden
@Mystical Chick: That’s beautiful. You’re a great writer.
There will never be another Tunch, but hopefully John will find another cat soon to love and be loved by. Pets bring so much joy to our lives. I know they’re not children, but they are family.
WereBear
@ruemara: I loved the misty trees!
fuckwit
WIth regard to the excreable Zimmerman, it reminds me of the last high-profile time someone got away with murder. And it’s a damn shame Zimmerman wasn’t a rich celebrity like OJ, so we could have a civil trial for millions of dollars, and another chance for Martin’s family to get some justice.
SIA
@Soprano2: No one should have to through so much loss in such a short time. I know it happens (it did to me in the late 90’s) but damn….
Demkat620
I haven’t commented much in a while but, I wanted to say how sorry I am, John.
Tunch and his antics always brought a smile to my face and I have shed more than a few tears for both of you.
He was a friend and he was loved. God bless you both.
West of the Cascades
@fuckwit: and Florida could amend its laws to create an affirmative duty to retreat for a person carrying a firearm when in a confrontation with a person who is unarmed. As was the case at common law and common sense. Call it the Trayvon Rule. And I’d like to see a federal civil rights prosecution in this case as well as another avenue for some justice. I don’t have much hope for either.
And I’d like this weekend to end.
JPL
@raven: Thank you! It’s always fun to see what the community looks like. Just as I imagined btw.
InternetDragons
For all those kindly offering John advice (“don’t get a cat yet”, “get a cat immediately”, “don’t get a cat, get a kitten”, etc…).
There have been so many posts that you might have missed the part where he said he wants to adopt one or more senior/abandoned cats once a little time has passed.
That sounds like a great plan to me (hey, however he wants to handle this sounds great to me, but the senior cats idea is lovely). Anyway, just pointing out that he already thought about how he wants to handle the “next cat” part and has just said he needs a little time. I’m sure he’ll know when he’s ready, and/or fate will send the right cat(s) his way even if he thinks he isn’t ready yet. We all know how that can go.
Hugs to all, and peace and healing to JC and family.
Mnemosyne
Since a Balloon Juice thread requires an argument, I’m in the “a new cat will find you when you’re ready” camp. Keaton grabbed me from his rescue org cage as I walked through Petco to buy cat food for Boris. G and I both picked the same cat — Annie — from that rescue org’s website when Keaton was driving us NUTS with his neediness after Boris died. And Charlotte dropped from the underside of a car the day before our anniversary and demanded that G take her (and her sister) home.
Friends of mine lost both of their elderly cats within a year of each other and then had three (3) Ragdoll kittens turn up on their doorstep (literally) a few months later. So I’m a big believer that the right cat will present themselves to you when you’re ready, even if you think you’re not ready when it happens.
Valdivia
Big hugs. I told my Mom when I got back from ny trip today and she put on the Tunch shirt and she doesn’t even read the blog! The power of John and Tunch.
raven
@JPL: That’s funny, they are NEVER as I imagined! I would like the photo tagged!
Patricia Kayden
@fuckwit: The lawyers for Trayvon’s family are hinting that they’ll file a civil suit against Zimmerman. I see that happening in the near future.
Mnemosyne
Also, too, I’m a believer in wallowing for at least a day or two, so I’m also in the “stay in your Dutch oven of grief until tomorrow” camp.
Been spending the weekend making the final plans for my dad’s memorial. It’s all coming together, but I resent having to do it at all.
Daniel
Hi John….
I’ve read this blog with great enjoyment for three years, and have only begun to comment recently.
I hope you see this post.
I think I understand your loss of your much-loved Tunch even though I have never experienced the death of a pet. Since the age of 16 (in 1982) after breaking my neck, I have negotiated through life with a wheelchair, and will do until my last breath.
Everyday I have a sense of terrible loss and opportunities denied, but also of the beauty of the world, the beauty of love which sustain me–though there are many dark days, and always will be.
This is a rather complicated way of advising you to always remember the beautiful in your life even as you negotiate through sadness and pain.
I, like you, listen to the GD, and though I check out of their playing career by late 1978, there is, on youtube, the best version of Peggy-O I’ve heard from Duke University, April, 1978. Check it out…Jerry at his most soulful.
donovong
No advice here, no recommendations for grief cure-alls. Just, whatever you do, please keep checking in once in a while, so we know that you are still alive.
ruemara
@raven: Close, but not within, my security minded ojisan.
Chris Grrr
Quinerly’s right, John – I hope you keep blogging your way through. Whatever it takes to get by.
We were inspired to come together and hear about your stable of critters. Your honesty now is going to help more people than you’ll ever know.
WaterGIrl
Grief is like a river; you just have to go where it takes you, and the journey will take as long as it takes. John, we’re here whenever you want people around, and I know you’ll ignore us when you don’t.
I lost my first dog at just 9 months old when one of my 8 roommates let her out of the house, not on a leash, and she was hit by a car. The first thing I did was tell everyone that I did not want to know who let her out because I didn’t know if I would be able to let that go.
John, you don’t have the luxury of not knowing, but you have a heart full of love. So no matter what happened, I know that in time you’ll all be okay.
raven
@ruemara: Ooops, sorry.
KyCole
I remember when my dog was run over by the school bus in front of my kids. Losing a beloved pet in a horrific way makes the grief worse in my experience. I spent a week in bed crying. Do what you have to do to heal. I’m so sorry about Tunch.
Mary G
Dutch oven until you are done. Virtual hugs.
raven
@WaterGIrl: My best friend ran over my dog while I was working on my truck out a Brownfield Woods. The pup was watching me from under his truck and I reached for him when I heard the engine start but it was too tale. We raced into town, cut through Blair Park to the Vet Med Hospital on Lincoln but it was too late. He was my best friend then and he’s my best friend now.
gogol's wife
@Mnemosyne:
I’ve had eight cats over the years beginning in 1985, and I have never set foot in a shelter. They all found me.
Cacti
@fuckwit:
Oh, there may be yet. I’ve no doubt that clan Zimmerman will go on a national victory tour to sop up some of that sweet wingnut welfare.
He killed a black kid and got away with it. He’s a hero to millions now.
AnnaN
I am so sorry. Add me to the huge list of those grieving with you over the loss of your sweet companion. I would like to give you a hug and a box of kleenex. Please take care.
Flying Squirrel Girl
Life is a series of good pets. We love every one of them as differently as their many different personalities, but all of them fiercely. My heart goes out to you, and is breaking for you. Making a donation to MARC in Tunch’s honor.
Violet
@Flying Squirrel Girl: I have a feeling MARC has been inundated with donations. Tunch and John Cole are helping so many needy animals.
khead
@Mnemosyne:
Definitely this. The three we have now all showed up at random. Two at our house and then one in a storage unit. It will happen.
John Weiss
John, I’m so sorry that you’ve lost the mighty Tunch. I lost my darling Priscilla (queen of the desert) a couple of months ago. I’ll never get over that. I dream of her. I’ll find another kitty and go on, and you should too.
I still weep over that little turd. Not to mention all the others.
Villago Delenda Est
John, I would like to state, right here, right now, that you are as much at fault for Tunch’s passing as I am the true heir to the Manchu dynasty.
Never mind my Scots features. I underwent gene therapy like that Bond villain in Die Another Day.
Yup, I’m the true heir to the Manchu dynasty.
And in exactly that sense, you’re at fault here.
Also, too, what everyone else has been saying about this particular facet of this weekend of woe.
I know why you’re pining for Monday. You think that throwing yourself into your work will help ease the pain you’re feeling. That may be true, but you’ll still come home to a sofa that has a dent but not a dentee. Let the girls help you, and consider adopting another feline. No cat can ever replace Tunch, the dent is too big to fill. BUT, it will help. And consider adopting a kitten, not just a grown cat. Or, in the best of all possible worlds, a kitten and a grown cat. Might get close to tipping the scales on ol’ Tunch.
He lives on, the hero-cat, in our hearts, memories, and in the saving of all those other animals he inspired.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
I’m a sporadic reader (attacks of despair make me avoid politics for long stretches) and a very infrequent commenter, so I just now read about Tunch, and I have to express my condolences.
I know how hard it is—I’ve lost many dear friends of the furry persuasion over my 60 years—and it never gets any easier. I just console myself with the thought that they were as happy as I was capable of making them as long as I was able to do so.
We have two (almost) 12-year-old cats now and I know it won’t be long before they’re gone as well, but the alternative is that they would have had much shorter and much less enjoyable lives if we hadn’t taken them in. (They were both rescues, I guess you could say—not pound rescues, but rescues.)
Some people just will never get it: “It was just a cat (dog)!” So far I’ve manged not to physically assault anyone who said something like that, but it’s been hard. Really hard, sometimes.
The pain will eventually become less acute—just take all the time you need to adjust. This blog isn’t a job, or a public service sentence. Take care of yourself first. All my sympathies, again.
Odie Hugh Manatee
When Tommy, our giant orange Maine Coon, died almost three years ago, it was in my arms. I felt his last breath and his final shudder as life departed his body. Even now it brings tears to my eyes. I keep kicking myself for not ignoring the shitty vet’s advice and calling another vet, trying to take the blame for his death.
I know what you are going through John, and it flat out sucks. Still, you gave Tunch a good home for many years and in return he gave you his love and friendship.
Quit beating yourself up John, you’re a good guy and your pets know it. Shit happens and there is nothing you can do to change it once it has happened.
SiubhanDuinne
@SIA: I used to refer to 1999 as “The Year of the Funerals.” My beloved aunt, my best friend from college, my ex-husband (who was still a very good friend), another good friend of many years’ standing, all died, one lingeringly, the others suddenly and shockingly. A colleague died, and two people I knew although not that well were killed in (separate) auto accidents. It got to the point that I was literally afraid to answer the phone for a while.
Last Friday (only two days ago, feels like a lifetime) I learned that a colleague here had just been diagnosed with melanoma and my best friend from high school had just been diagnosed with lung cancer. Then yesterday, Stuck, Tunch, Zimmerman verdict. I do hate these cosmic clusters of catastrophe. And we’re all going through this one. And it sucks.
snarkyspice
John, I just wanted you to know that 3,000 miles away, here in rural northern England, I sat in my garden this afternoon and wept for Tunch, having just caught up with the news. I can’t believe how much I care about a man I have never met and a cat I never knew, but I do. Lots.
Tried to explain to my neighbour why I was crying. Don’t think he fully understood, but he was kind anyway.
My husband sends his love too. We’re thinking of you and I hope you feel a little bit better tomorrow.
raven
@SiubhanDuinne: Obviously, for me, it was 1968. I guess it’s good when it happens when you are 18 so you know what is coming.
Yatsuno
@Villago Delenda Est: Not to make too fine a point of it, but the Mongols were quite good at getting their genes spread over quite a wide area.
(Wrong attribution, fixteth.)
Villago Delenda Est
Totally OT, but today is Bastille Day in France.
Vive la révolution!
SiubhanDuinne
@Soprano2: That is a terrible lot of sadness, especially in such a compressed period of time. Hugs to you.
RoonieRoo
I’ve been crying off and on today for Tunch. It just hits way to close to home in our cat and dog filled household. I just start to tear up periodically through the day and John just nods because he knows I’m thinking about you.
John and I have been thinking about you so much today and wishing we could take some of the grief for you. Don’t rush yourself. This week is going to be hard but you know you have a huge following that will be here with you every step of the way.
WaterGIrl
@raven: Sorry you lost your dog that way. You’re a good man.
I was 21 and I wasn’t sure I could let it go if I knew, and I didn’t want to lose any friends over a careless act that had terrible consequences.
I’ve shed a lot of tears for John and Tunch today, and I imagine that beyond the loss of Tunch, Cole and his siblings are all reeling from the horror of what happened.
JanetteB
Long-time lurker here. I’ve read your blog at least once a day since 2005, and I had come to feel that Tunch was one of my cats. I’m just devastated. Although I believe that all of our furry friends frolic in heaven and will one day be reunited with us, that thought is not enough to relieve the grief. I know that Tunch will always occupy a special place in your heart and mind. I also know that someday another cat will have his own place there as well. I’ve been down this road several times so I know.
Hal
I found this video very comforting last night. A man rescues three Chihuahuas. The ending is a little bitter sweet though, but it’s great to have people like this in the world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKHjgAZzvyQ
cckids
This has been a terrible weekend. Sad and infuriating news.
I find myself watching Ken Burns’ Civil War on PBS (it is the episode about Sherman’s devastating the South) and with every awesome quote from Sherman I am cheering him on, thinking of Trayvon Martin.
“They have chosen war as their remedy, and I mean to give them their fill of it.”
raven
@WaterGIrl: It was an accident. I hate it but, as you know, they happen. A few years later when I was in the hospital in Atlanta with a broken back he took the bus all the way from Berkeley to be with me.
WaterGIrl
@raven: P.S. I remember the race to the hospital, too. Arrow died in the car before we ever made it to the vet.
I think maybe we love our firsts in a special way, no protection of our heart, no realization that there will be loss, just full-on total all-in LOVE.
I will never forget how I felt losing my first dog, and even though I was heartbroken about losing my other dogs over the years, losing my first cat (quiver) was shocking. He was my kitty soulmate and he was also my first kitty love. It completely knocked me on my behind.
Cole has a tough road ahead. I know he will come out okay, but he has a pile of hell to wade through as he makes his way to the other side.
WaterGIrl
@raven: What a good friend. Sounds like a friendship forged with fire. You were laid up for something like 6 months, right?
edit: when I said laid up, I should have said “immobile’.
LT
John, just going about my business yesterday I had several clutch the gut momemts thinking of you, and your brother, in those bad moments. We’re still with you, okay? Damn.
raven
@WaterGIrl: Yea, that was a strange thing in our case. We got Floyd when Ralphie was only about three. After Floyd died Ralphie and Co-Co had Henry Doodle Bug. Ralphie was really my first dog and he’s the one I let hang on longer than I should have. I swore I’d never do that again and haven’t in the subsequent 25 years. You can’t win (or lose) either way. Sudden or long term it’s agonizing but I guess that’s why they are so meaningful.
rn in nyc
John, so very sorry for your loss. long time reader never registered, never commented, coming out of the swamps of Jersey to send you heartfelt hugs to you. I have loved & lost a pet suddenly, a soulmate, better than any friend or relative, better than any spouse. It happened on a Sunday and I went to work on Monday determined not to speak about it because I knew I’d lose it. In the first minute of my day someone asked how my weekend was and I lost it. I waited two months, every day in pain until I heard about a mostly mini-schnauzer puppy abandoned at a farm, advertised at a mini-schnazuer resuce. He was a mess, full of intestinal bugs and festering cuts in his fur. Took him home, stayed up with him all night for weeks while he cried & pooped out the bugs. That was 3 years ago. I still think of the dog I lost but am so very grateful to the dog that saved me.
hugs to you from a real nurse in nyc
raven
@WaterGIrl: Two months in the hospital, 9 in a full body cast and three more in a brace. But when I read Daniel’s situation it reinforces how lucky I was.
asiangrrlMN
Oh, Cole. I would give you a big hug if I could. I have to say, even in your grief, you have a way with words. I half-smiled at your description of your mother racing your father to the hospital, thinking, “Haven’t I heard this before?” The situation isn’t funny at all, but your second-to-last sentence was. Cuddle your girls. I hope they can give you a modicum of comfort in this dark hour.
schrodinger's cat
A Tribute to Tunch Kitteh
dance around in your bones
@gogol’s wife:
This is interesting and got me to thinking about how all my cats were introduced into my life. I can think of only one we got from a shelter – they had a room there where all the cats lounged on shelves and cat trees, and one black cat with the most beautiful green eyes immediately jumped down from the cat tree, ran over to the window, put his paws on the windowsill and gazed straight into our eyes. Well, that was it. He came home with us for the next 10 years.
All the rest just hopped over the wall or strolled onto the front porch or were found as kitties under a bush, covered with fleas or cowering in the backyard of an abandoned house……main point, those cats all found US and we were the better for it.
I’m a big fan of cats who adopt YOU.
schrodinger's cat
@asiangrrlMN: Ohai! Haven’t seen you around in these parts lately fellow Tunch fan.
Comrade Mary
For John and everyone else (including me) who has ever beaten themselves up over the death of a beloved pet, Peter Watts has a few words and many pictures for us all in his story of Banana and the concept of the Life Sausage
.
I think Tunch’s life sausage was built to scale with his heft and heart, thanks to you, John.
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
I want to second the advice about laying in a stock of Gatorade and some sort of nutrition drink and/or bar. Crying robs you of electrolytes as efficiently as sweating does, and it kills your ability to appreciate food. Sometimes, it even kills your ability to stomach food.
Gotta take care of yourself so you can take care of the girls.
RN in NYC
John,
Long time reader, never registered, never commented, coming out of the Swamps of Jersey to send you hugs through the internet.
I had a dog named Mackey, best dog ever, that dog loved me and I loved him more than anything ever. Just an intense and insane relationship. When he was 8 years old, he died in my bed, one Sunday morning. Let out a screech & that was it. I went to work that Monday numb, determined to not tell a soul. If I didn’t talk about it, it wasn’t real. Five minutes into my shift, a co-worker asked how my weekend was and I lost it. Cried so hard my boss had to send me home.
I waited two months, wanting to get another dog but knowing there was no filling the hole in my heart. I scanned rescue sites wanting to get another dog but feeling guilty about replacing Mackey. One day I read about a puppy that had been abandoned at a farm upstate, a mostly mini-schnauzer with intestinal bugs & sores on his fur. So, I rented a car and drove up to the farm, gave them 50 bucks for their trouble & took him home, stayed up nights with him while he cried & pooped out the bugs.
That was 3 years ago. I still think of Mackey every now and then, and when I do, I hug Murphy the Mostly Mini-Schnauzer & he licks me with his awful dog breath tongue.
Hugs to you John, I really feel your pain. It will get better, I promise.
Love,
a Real Nurse in NYC
Redshift
Hey, John,
I’m just catching up after being completely off the blog yesterday* and I just wanted to add to all the other kind words. I think we all feel like we knew the big guy through you (even Ms. Redshift, who has never posted here, found the news very upsetting.) I’m not going to try to offer any advice, but just know that we’re here for you, and Tunch had a whole lot of people who cared about him, even if most of us never got to meet him.
(* I managed to scratch my cornea about six weeks back, and it was all recovered until I went back to work and was staring at a computer all day, so now I’m trying to avoid also staring at a computer all weekend, which is actually pretty tough for me.)
Gustopher
I feel a little odd that I am more upset about Tunch than Trayvor Martin. I suppose that if Trayvor had been the blog mascot for years, it would be different, but I feel like I knew Tunch. Poor Tunch, he was a great cat.
Don’t beat yourself up with what happened to Tunch, Mr. Cole. You can take every reasonable precaution, and even some unreasonable precautions, but you can’t take every possible precaution, and sometimes terrible things do happen.
For instance, you go to the store to get some Skittles, and a racist wanna-be tough-guy playing cop stalks you, frightens you, scares you to the point where you try to defend yourself, and then shoots you to death and then gets off scott free because of terrible laws and prosecutors not really trying.
You did good with Tunch. And Lily. And especially Rosie. Your father is not doing so good with his fingers though…
asiangrrlMN
@schrodinger’s cat: Good to see ya despite the circumstances! I’ve pared waaaaay back on politics lately, but the sad news of Tunchie’s demise drew me back. Your post on him made me smile as a fellow unabashed-Tunchie fan.
@Yatsuno: Hi, hon. ::hugs::
AliceBlue
I’ve been so down and dispirited today. It’s like yesterday never ended.
Hugs and peace to you John.
raven
@asiangrrlMN: Hi
Violet
@asiangrrlMN: Hi, asiangrrrlMN! Have missed seeing you around these parts.
cuillean
Another longtime lurker here de-lurking to say how very sad I am to read of Tunch’s untimely demise.
He was one cool cat. How lucky you and he were to have each other for all these years, John.
And how lucky we were that you shared him with us.
Be well.
On the Death of a Cat
In life, death
was nothing
to you: I am
willing to wager
my soul that it
simply never occurred
to your nightmareless
mind, while sleep
was everything
(see it raised
to an infinite
power and perfection). No death
in you then, so now
how even less. Dear stealth
of innocence
licked polished
to an evil
luster, little
milk fang, whiskered
night
friend
go.
– Franz Wright
asiangrrlMN
@raven: Hey, Raven! Good to see you.
@Violet: Hey, Violet! It’s good to see you, too.
Man, I’ve missed you guys.
Violet
@asiangrrlMN: Stop by any time. Would love to see more of your comments. Loved how we used to have fun on the late night threads.
Bob In Portland
If I could just take this occasion to say what I’ve never said before: Tucker Carlson is a douchebag.
schrodinger's cat
@asiangrrlMN: Thanks! How are your purry terrors? I have missed you.