Not sure how I am going to approach this subject and I am a little afraid of the repercussions of posting this, but since I kinda just usually let it all hang out, I’ll plow forward in my own way and deal with the fallout in a predictable manner- probably giving some online middle fingers and attacking people in the comments before calming down and apologizing profusely for being wrong. One of the best things about this website is that I’ve found that just being straight up and honest with you all always leads to straight up and honest responses, so whatever. Or maybe for once I won’t be wrong, but, regardless, y’all better strap in because there is going to be a lot to unpack in this one. Hold on.
Today was a legitimately hot and humid day, and after messing around in the yard for a while, I went to Wheeling, hit Lowe’s, Coleman’s, and Jebbia’s, and came home. Picked up some pretty amazing portabellas and some mangos that would make you cry (saving those sugar bombs for the Hawks/Red Wings game), and made some stuffed portabellas, some tomatoes/onions/cukes, and some sweet corn for dinner. I also made a command decision I was tired of being hot, so I turned on the ac to bring the heat down inside the house from 85. I hate turning it on this early, but the ceiling fans were not doing it and the thermostat had 85, so I had little choice.
At any rate, I’m a big fan of the Showtime show The Borgias– it is right up my alley. Pseudo historical dreck with lots of violence, scheming, T&A, and what now, as well as a fictional confirmation of everything I already think about the Catholic hierarchy. So I was watching the last two episodes, and in one they meet the Duke of Urbina, who trounces around naked in a sauna with what must be a 12 inch cock, and in the second, my absolute favorite character, Micheletto, the assassin, has several trysts with a male lover.
In both occasions, I got that metallic taste in my mouth and just thought “EWW.” I have no problem with stating out loud that I think another man is good looking- a couple months ago my mom dropped off the SI swimsuit edition (she gives it to me every year and I leaf through it and then take it up to the frat boys), and I remember seeing a pic of David Beckham selling watches and thinking “Damn, that’s a good looking man” and the other day I was chit chatting with commenter JenJen (a hockey fanatic) during the Pens game and said “I think Letang is a good looking man” and she responded “MMMMHMMM” or something to that extent. But, you know what? I don’t want to see their cocks or watch them have sex together.
But I just can’t watch scenes of gay sex on tv, despite the fact that I fully support people to do what they want to do and the only thing I think anyone should ever care about is who is in their own god damned bed. I’m in favor of gay marriage, I support complete rights for all Americans, I have no problem with men kissing in public or holding hands or adopting kids, but still, I react the same way every time I see men romantically involved in carnal acts on tv. I hit fast forward.
I guess what I am wondering is does this make me a bigot? Or is this what tolerance is all about? I may not find it appealing, but I have no problem with it. I have gay friends who tell me the idea of sleeping with a woman makes them physically ill, and I tell myself I am just the mirror image of that. Am I the only one?
But wait, it doesn’t stop there. Why is it that there is so much female nudity in films and tv shows, but male nudity is so rare I can count it on one hand? Is that because male sex does not sell, or is it because Hollywood is dominated by males and they are as squeamish as me about video of gay sex in cinema?
Like I said, a lot to unpack, but you all should just be happy you don’t have to deal with the shit rattling around my pumpkin sized head all day. And please, a serious discussion would be nice rather than dozens of comments speculating about whether I am closeted. I’m not. I’m hetero and I was born that way, just like all of you were born with your sexual preferences and orientations.
*** Update ***
JenJen texted me to call me a liar, because she was not lusting after Letang, but Pascal Dupuis. I don’t remember, because I was on the bottle.