Please tell me they’re trolling. PLEASE, Sweet Merciful Jesus, tell me they’re trolling.
This is just unconscionable dipshittery.
2.
SiubhanDuinne
Nothing more to say. “For fuck’s sake” says it all.
3.
Just Some Fuckhead
Space out hooks along the vertical bars of your child’s crib for a convenient and nifty gun rack.
4.
cmorenc
Just when I think the NRA can’t get any more irresponsible and insane, they outdo themselves.
5.
Litlebritdifrnt
If I may be completely an asshole, meh at least it will thin out the herd so to speak. What? That is exactly what they say about liberals and abortion.
6.
Yutsano
They love their guns more than their own flesh and blood. It’s as simple as that.
7.
Just Some Fuckhead
Sew a slot into your child’s favorite stuffed animal for a great place to stash a loaded handgun.
8.
cathyx
I think under the pillow is a good spot.
9.
scav
They’re still thinking small. There should clearly be a loaded semi in every room in the house (not omitting hallways and closets) so they are instantly available at a moments notice. Don’t omit the trunk in case carjackers bundle you into there while stealing your toddlers as you drive the womders to T-ball. Number one critical room in the house is actually the BATHROOM where you may have been so unwary as to take off your holster and body armor while showering.
Southern Beale is going to be kept very busy, what with tracking all those “terrible accident,” “who could have foreseen?,”haven’t they suffered enough?,” “just cleaning it” and similar GODDAMN FUCKING LAME FAIL EXCUSES.
Fuck those fucking fucktards.
11.
Chet
I don’t get it. If you have guns in your house, your kids know where they are anyway. Do you think your bedroom door is a magic force field? If you have kids, don’t fucking have guns in your house. If you have kids and guns, your guns better be in a safe they can’t open. And if they can’t open it, what the fuck does it matter what room the safe is in?
12.
gnomedad
They are four fucking years old and absolutely can’t stand being told they shouldn’t do something. Now would be an excellent time to remind them (as another commenter suggested recently) of the dangers of running a car in a closed garage.
13.
JPL
@Litlebritdifrnt: Let me be an asshole, politics doesn’t dictate who gets an abortion. Conservatives like to promote that fallacy, without any proof.
I hope that liberals are smart enough to keep a gun out of a child’s room and that makes me biased.
14.
askew
Nothing the NRA does surprises me anymore. They are basically marketing arms for the gun manufacturers and these manufacturers have no shame. It’s similar to how the cigarette manufacturers were until they lost all those lawsuits. Remember all the ads marketed to children and telling us how cool smoking was?
I actually thought this link was going to be to a story about the Obama admin seriously considering arming Syrian rebels. That is a dumbfuck idea that will backfire on us for decades to come.
15.
JPL
@gnomedad: You might have the solution. They could keep their guns in the garage with the car running.
your guns better be in a safe they can’t open. And if they can’t open it, what the fuck does it matter what room the safe is in?
That kind of practicality doesn’t lend itself very well to the outrage mongers here.
21.
JWL
George “The Tall Coyote” Bush (The Elder)* possessed the decency to turn his back on the NRA after it declared federal marshals to be “jack booted thugs”. He did that many years ago.
Do any of today’s republicans possess a similar decency?
The question is, of course, rhetorical.
*(“There was one exact moment, in fact, when I knew for sure that Al Gore would Never be President of the United States, no matter what the experts were saying — and that was when the whole Bush family suddenly appeared on TV and openly scoffed at the idea of Gore winning Florida. It was Nonsense, said the Candidate, Utter nonsense. … Anybody who believed Bush had lost Florida was a Fool. The Media, all of them, were Liars & Dunces or treacherous whores trying to sabotage his victory.”).
Hunter “The Good Doctor” Thompson (RIP)
22.
MattF
And, of course, the guns in every room would all have to be loaded, since you don’t want to be scrounging around for bullets during an emergency. And everyone would have to know where the guns are and how to shoot them. And when your five-year old points his finger at his little sister and says ‘BANG’, you should congratulate him for being brave and grownup.
That should about do it.
23.
Corner Stone
@Just Some Fuckhead: They can stash it in the body cavity of their kids’ favorite stuffed animal. The Roo really packs a kick, eh mate?
24.
the Conster
LOL @ fucktards.
25.
scav
Children know what medicine cabinets are and can crawl up and get in there so why are we bothering with child-proof caps and not selling drugs to minors?
What do you mean “basically”? S&W is the sponsor of the NRA Women’s recruiting initiative.
To Juicers who own firearms: do you make an effort to buy from a maker with the least noxious political affiliations? Do such exist?
29.
scav
@Corner Stone: well, apart from having it in the room where the child has the most unsupervised time might have an unfortunate overlap with the odd moment someone forgets to lock it. But that would be outrage mongering so easily passed over.
30.
Corner Stone
@gnomedad: An eco friendly gun manufacturer? Gun makers are in business to make the best product possible, and to move that product to as many potential buyers as possible.
This is a silly question.
@gnomedad: I have a japanese WWII rifle passed down to me and three weapons that my father owned.
33.
Corner Stone
@scav: This is stupid. Sticking a gun safe in a child’s room?
Give me a break.
34.
scav
@Corner Stone: Sorry for snark overload — I’m suffering from it myself.
35.
Corner Stone
@JPL: I say a King James Bible with a nice .380 in there.
“So sayeth the Lord! Amen!”
36.
Carl Nyberg
When I was home on leave from the Navy, I did run a home invader out of my parents house.
I awoke when the guy busted the basement door, which was under the room where I slept.
I went downstairs to investigate. I could see the flicker of a lighter illuminating the wall. I awoke my brother and told him to call 911.
The guy fled when he heard me.
I was nervous, but I didn’t feel like I needed a firearm to deal with the situation. And I don’t feel like a firearm or firearms in the house would have made me safer.
What do you mean “basically”? S&W is the sponsor of the NRA Women’s recruiting initiative.
You know, for a second I wondered why the hell a seller of canned tomatoes would be sponsoring an “initiative” featuring products such as “boob holsters”.
I think this is perfect – as long as they store all their ammo up their ass. Just to keep it safe
40.
mai naem
I think people should store the gun in the diaper. With boys, it should have the gun facing the same way as the pen1s and hopefully it’ll discharge at the diaper changer’s face like the way the pen1s does sometimes.
41.
Carl Nyberg
To me it’s weird for people to obsess over the possibility someone might break into their homes to do them harm.
This is an exceedingly rare form of crime (break-in and attack the occupants).
It seems like a willful ignorance of reality to think this is likely to be a problem for any given person.
But I suppose it is a way for the firearms industry to sell more product.
42.
Ken
What I don’t get – probably because it’s the irrationality at the heart of it all – is that the same parents would not even consider storing cleaning supplies, knives, or even matches in their kids’ rooms, and probably many of them even put those little plugs in the electrical sockets.
@Chet: I didn’t even know my dad had a gun until 1996 (Aussie gun turn in) when I saw him leaving the house with a shotgun to take it down to the cop station. I would never had known if I hadn’t dropped by my parents house that day.
When I said “I didn’t know you had a gun.” His only reply was “That’s right.”
To me it’s weird for people to obsess over the possibility someone might break into their homes to do them harm.
This is an exceedingly rare form of crime (break-in and attack the occupants).
Well…sure. But these are people who have already paid some moron to testify before Congress that she needs “assault rifles” because their scary appearance will help her when she has 5-against-one firefights in her livingroom. Testimony that, in my view, should disqualify her from living outside of an institutional setting.
Here is THE FULL quote in which ‘Tall Coyote’ is invoked– “the old man was the real tip off”..
Hunter Thompson On George W. Bush:
“There was one exact moment, in fact, when I knew for sure that Al Gore would never be President of the United States, no matter what the experts were saying — and that was when the whole Bush family suddenly appeared on TV and openly scoffed at the idea of Gore winning Florida. The old man was the real tip-off. The leer on his face was almost frightening. It was like looking into the eyes of a tall hyena* with a living sheep in its mouth. The sheep’s fate was sealed, and so was Al Gore’s.”
* (My heartfelt apology to coyotes everywhere for the initial misattribution).
Huh. Well, my family must have been too stupid to live then. My dad had guns and he also had six kids. And none of us six had a clue as to where he kept his guns. As a young adult, I moved back in when I was going to grad school. That’s the first time he showed me where the guns were. And the only reason he showed me then was there was a serial killer running around the area at the time.
@geg6: The only time I have loaded a weapon in the house was when a prof went off and shot his wife and two other people three blocks away. No one knew exactly what had happened, we just knew three people were dead and the dude was on the loose.
62.
Villago Delenda Est
Well, you know, all these “guns within easy reach” ideas are just terrific for the merchants of death. After all, no house without at least two pistols and two rifles in each room is properly protected. Also, be sure to design houses with firearms sight lines as the primary consideration.
63.
Librarian
@Mike in NC: I remember Robert Mitchum doing that in a movie where he played a minister in the old West.
64.
Corner Stone
For those idiots who keep saying how responsible their parents were for owning guns but never telling them where they were, I have a big fucking fireproof safe my son would need a cracksman or a hell of a torch to get into. A pry bar wouldn’t work because of where it’s positioned.
He knows where every one of them is. And he has about as much chance of getting one as I do of kissing Salma Hayek goodnight.
Now, what if he found my stash one day when I wasn’t there and he hadn’t been warned about them?
This is stupid. Your parents were fucking foolish for playing roulette that you wouldn’t find a firearm one day when you were hunting for Sandy Claw’s stash.
Morons. Be fucking responsible.
65.
Corner Stone
Shit. I used the term for a game where a person spins a little white ball round a wheel and now I’m moderated. Lovely.
66.
Omnes Omnibus
@Villago Delenda Est: Interlocking fields of fire and Claymores in the dead spots?
67.
Violet
In all the footage I saw from the NRA convention, I saw only one person who was non-white (and Asian male), and most were middle-aged men. Probably around 80% of the attendees in the footage. If they can’t figure out how to recruit younger, less white members then demographics are going to start being a real problem for them.
Friend 15 blocks away has a howitzer registered on all your rooms.
70.
Tom_B
@Corner Stone: blessed are the meek; they’re easier to pick off.
71.
Chet
@geg6: I don’t know if your family is stupid, but you sure as shit are. By the time I was 10 I knew the location of every gun in the house, and all the ammunition. Never played with them, never even loaded them – because my dad had told me the story of how as a kid he’d nearly taken his sisters head off with his day’s unsecured service revolver – but, man, if you didn’t know where your parents kept stuff you’re just a grade A mouth breather.
@raven: I’m suppose to have some pine trees removed and the date keeps getting pushed back. The house I bought has a man made little pond that was put in wrong.
The easy fix is five hundred but to do it right would be thousands. I’m going to have it buried. I’m just not the type of person who wants to spend hundreds to hear the water fall. I hate GA Power already and don’t want to give them more money than I have to. I’ll have to do more landscaping but I enjoy that.
We knew where my dad kept his guns — in a locked room that only he had a key to. The fact that your father had a traumatic experience and was still stupid enough to leave guns laying around for you to play with says a whole lot about your family.
I’ve been asking friends & acquaintances “Has there ever been a time in your life where you would have been better off if you’d had a gun?” (Not counting the military, of course.) Not a single affirmative, but two guys told me a similar story: They heard someone breaking into their house and at the time they wished they had a gun … and later were very glad they didn’t. One turned out to be a very drunk neighbor who thought his key didn’t work for some reason, and the other was a teenage wannabe burglar who thought no one was home and skedaddled when the lights went on.
I know I keep saying this, but I just can’t help myself: No one is going to break into your home and kill you. If you really want to keep your family safe, don’t have any guns in the house.
82.
Litlebritdifrnt
@JPL: How many emerging critters are you going to murder doing that? How many frogs? How many dragonflies that have been overwintering in the safety of your pond?
If they can’t figure out how to recruit younger, less white members then demographics are going to start being a real problem for them.
Their newly-elected President calls the 1860s…unpleasantness “The War of Northern Aggression”. He thinks all males should learn to use “military weapons”, while visibly displaying zero evidence that he could survive 24 hours in the military.
One of their board members is a serial poacher who sat in his own excrement for a week to avoid military service in a war that he does not otherwise criticize.
I’m thinking this is not news to the voters who, from recent polls, appear to be hating on Ayotte (R-NH), Begich (D-AK), and who appear OK with Toomey (R-PA) and Landrieu (D-LA).
I wouldn’t say it’s impossible, but you’re far more likely to be struck by lightning than to be the victim of murderous home invaders. Hell, you’re probably more likely to slip and fall in the bathtub and accidentally kill yourself than you are to have strangers break in to try and kill you.
86.
Omnes Omnibus
@Hungry Joe: I was mugged once and afterwards an army buddy asked me if I had changed my mind about concealed carry. I told him that the last thing I wanted to introduce into a situation like that was a loaded weapon. I lost about $50 and had to get my credit cards and DL reissued. I also got two stitches near my eye. It was not worth either dying or killing over that.
Interlocking fields of fire and Claymores in the dead spots?
We’ve already worked out the fields of fire, but the damn in-ground sprinkler system plays absolute hell with positioning the claymores.
Plus, booby traps are automatic incarceration. Probably not a big deal if the zombie cheetocolypse happens and all but til then…
91.
dewzke
Chet? What you portray is absolutely odd. People are talking about kids and guns in the house and you must have been smart one day….ballyhoo for you.
92.
RSA
How about putting a quick-access safe in your kids’ room? […] Good idea or bad idea? We have an emotional pushback to that.
No, you’re seeing anti-stupidity pushback on that.
@Mnemosyne: You’re right — it’s not impossible. But someone in your family is far more likely to be injured or killed by the gun you keep than at the hands of a murderous home invader. All together, now: NO ONE IS GOING TO BREAK INTO YOUR HOME AND TRY TO KILL YOU.
I’m hoping history books cover the rise of contrarianism in America (“Grade school massacre? Put guns in ALL schools!” “5 year old caps 2 year old sister? Keep a loaded gun with your children!”). It’s so strange/frustrating to live through it, but I’m curious how future generations will look at this era.
@Mnemosyne: I think it sounded like I was disagreeing with you somehow, but I wasn’t. I tried to edit and was told I didn’t have the right. Yet another freedom lost to Obama, I guess.
Now that I think about it, it turned out that my dad did have one other gun (a handgun) that he kept locked in a safe in his bedroom closet. I had no idea he had it until I went to college and they were packing up to move out of that house.
He was smart enough to keep the liquor bottles on top of it, so none of us kids bothered to try and figure out the safe when there was liquor to be had.
Why would I go looking around in my parents’ personal stuff and why would I want to find my dad’s guns? If we were going hunting or target shooting, he would provide the guns and take us. Unlike you, apparently, I took his lessons on gun safety seriously. Just because you were/are stupid enough to think guns were appropriate toys for hide and seek doesn’t mean it was okay. You are the kind of asshole that shouldn’t own guns if you think it’s fine for kids to rummage around in their parents’ belongings to find their guns without permission or supervision. Talk about mouth breathers.
101.
YellowJournalism
@geg6: It’s a shame your parents taught you to respect their privacy. Think of all the fun you could have had going through their drawers!
102.
Carl Nyberg
@Corner Stone:
Fighting off home invaders bent on physically harming occupants is a rare form of crime compared to real world problems that real people face on a regular basis.
I have been home-invaded three times and not once has the invader ever even attempted to harm me or anyone I was living with. Just grabbed my stuff and took off. I’m insured, and gun-free, and LOVE IT.
104.
El Cid
Why do we so foolishly separate “guns” from “non-guns”?
Why aren’t the legs of our furniture actually loaded firearms?
Why do we insist on having lamps and coat racks which aren’t firearms?
There should be a functional and loaded gun built into every sizeable and easily accessible object in the household, otherwise the commies have won.
105.
CaseyL
I’m with Litlebritdifrnt. Wingnuts don’t “believe in” birth control or abortion, so the only way to thin that herd is to let them win one Darwin Award after another.
@Omnes Omnibus: I had a similar experience: someone was in my house, lurking, and I had to fight him off.
Had a lot of people say, “Now! Don’t you wish you had a gun??”
To which I replied, “I was in my PJs, brushing my teeth, when he came out of the bathtub at me. Why would I have been carrying a goddamn gun, and where would I have put the goddamn gun?”
(PS: Fought him off successfully, BTW, and had the satisfaction of slamming the fuck out of him with the bedroom door. Was he ever caught by the cops? No: this was Miami in the mid-1980’s, when the crime rate was so high cops didn’t bother with a case unless it involved multiple corpses and/or tons of cocaine.)
106.
Tonal Crow
They’re trying to move the Overton Window. The problem is, they forgot about Overton Window Recoil.
@Carl Nyberg: I think it is comical when a bunch of white guys in the exurbs or in the rural boondocks, think that the Bloods, Crips, or MS-13 will come out to their neck of the woods just to do some bad stuff to them. So they must have an arsenal that would rival the stuff Neo and Trinity had on the Matrix.
Bond. James Bond. I assume that’s where they’re coming from. Of course, that’s where I naturally go when I hear that gun mentioned. “A delivery like a brick through a plate glass window.”
110.
Suzanne
@Chet: I lived with my grandparents as a kid, and they kept my great-grandfather’s WWI handgun in the house. They kept it hidden in a hope chest full of family heirlooms that I never looked at, because I wasn’t interested and I was told that those were their private things anyway. I didn’t know about it until I was fifteen, because I understood the basic concept of privacy, even as a kid. It’s really not hard.
Let me give you a hint: when visiting someone’s home, it’s considered impolite to go through your hosts’ dresser drawers. I’m sure that fact comes as a surprise to you. That’s probably why you’re never invited back.
111.
Lee Rudolph
@Chet: Wait. You mean stashing your gun with your other sex toys won’t keep the kids from finding it?
112.
Lee Rudolph
If you really need your guns in a hurry to prevent a home invasion, maybe you should consider keeping the guns out where you can get them fast, and put the kids in the safe.
113.
Gex
I’m not quite sure why the right hates abortion. Seems like if it wasn’t already a thing, they’d invent it to make sure more kids die.
114.
Roger Moore
@Lee Rudolph:
If you’re really worried about armed intruders breaking into your house, you should probably be more worried about your kids finding your large stash of narcotics, since drug dealers seem to be the main group for which it’s a realistic worry. Maybe the NRA members who are expressing these worries are revealing more than they’re willing to admit.
115.
Corner Stone
@Carl Nyberg: You can keep repeating that. But I am going to keep asking you where your get the stats to base that assertion from.
Rare compared to what? And rare in what population/arena?
I live in a fantastic neighborhood these days and we had 6 high school age boys who kick entered their way into several blocks worth of homes before they were caught.
They were bored or whatever and kicked in the back door of homes they thought the people were at work.
Except some of them were not.
Obviously this does not happen all the time but to say it’s rare demands a stat or cite.
So give us one or shut the fuck up.
116.
Brian
@Chet: do you have a kid? Is it common that kid plays alone in your room a lot? If so you are certainly in the minority. And that is why it matters.
117.
Corner Stone
Listen people. Adults with firearms should be responsible. They should secure those firearms. Period.
Saying they hid them or placed them in private areas is the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard.
Because you know what? Kids find shit. And even if *your* kids don’t find shit, you know what? Their stupid fucking friends don’t give a flying fuck about your panty drawer privacy. they are drawn to it like a moth to a flame.
Stop saying this absolutely stupid mouth breathing level of moronosity.
If you own a firearm it is your responsibility to secure it.
There is no difference between your beloved grandpa hiding it in a drawer than Ms. Lanza leaving it where her son could access it.
None. Period.
118.
Corner Stone
@Brian: I don’t even know what this means. What does this mean?
@The Sailor: Thanks. I could access the bjs link but could not get the ncbi link for some reason.
The bjs link seems to indicate a million people a year were present during a break in and some smaller percentage were assaulted during those incidents.
It’s not an epidemic but it doesn’t seem like a whole lot of freakin fun either. I, personally, would not classify this as “rare”.
121.
PIGL
@Suzanne:I think you word you mean is “burglary” or “breaking and entering” or “entering a dwelling house under cover of night”.
“Home invasion” is something that pants-wetting. gunbuggering, reichtards dreamed up to frighten the horses by making an ordinary and time-honoured crime seem extra special scary. Also, too, with extra NiCLANG.
There is a bit of a definitional problem. Some sources seem to count any burglary where someone is in the house as a “home invasion” even if the burglar flees as soon as they see someone is at home. I think that when most people think of a “home invasion,” they think of something like In Cold Blood, where bad guys break into the house with the specific intent of murdering the inhabitants and also rob them as an afterthought.
124.
El Cid
If it were truly a major societal factor (rather than a rarity blown up to larger-than-probable fear levels) that people had to continually defend against potential home invasions, maybe we ought to be doing something about the plague of home invasions instead of saying ‘hey maybe if everyone had guns and had them ready and had them everywhere it would help because one in a thousand times might result in a home being defended by a firearm.’
Just sayin’.
125.
PIGL
@Mnemosyne: you are right, of course…home invasions in this “invasion of vampires” sense are vanishingly rare, though, so we should try not to call every witless thief a one of those.
126.
Odie Hugh Manatee
If the safe uses a keypad for code entry it would be like having a deadly roulette wheel in the kids room.
Brilliant!
127.
Odie Hugh Manatee
Hep me, ize bean modded fur BAD werds! :)
128.
Suzanne
@PIGL: Sure, call it whatever you want. People were home, someone or some people broke in and stole shit. End of story.
Marketing real guns for kids is along the same lines as putting Jack Daniel’s in a sippy cup so that kids can learn early on the joys of drinking and that just a little snort every so often — if done in moderation — is actually going to teach them how not to get shitfaced. Because kids know all there is to know about self-control.
My guess is that these people who are in favor of storing guns in their kids’ bedrooms are violently opposed to giving away condoms to high school kids or allowing 15-year-olds to get the morning-after pill because that will only teach them to have sex. Just a hunch.
130.
scav
latest boy shoots sister whoops comes from FL, 13 yo shoots 6 yo, non-fatal and reported with a few stats, believe and corroborate at will.
According to the Children’s Defense Fund, one-third of all households with children younger than 18 have a gun, and more than 40 percent of gun-owning households with children store their guns unlocked.
The fund also reported that 22 percent of children with gun-owning parents handled guns in their homes without their parents’ knowledge.
131.
GeriUpNorth
I wonder how many of those people who think they need a gun in their kid’s room in case of a home invasion have taken the steps of putting bars over their windows and having a reinforced door and an alarm system, you know, like people who live in regions where that might actually happen do.
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The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik
Please tell me they’re trolling. PLEASE, Sweet Merciful Jesus, tell me they’re trolling.
This is just unconscionable dipshittery.
SiubhanDuinne
Nothing more to say. “For fuck’s sake” says it all.
Just Some Fuckhead
Space out hooks along the vertical bars of your child’s crib for a convenient and nifty gun rack.
cmorenc
Just when I think the NRA can’t get any more irresponsible and insane, they outdo themselves.
Litlebritdifrnt
If I may be completely an asshole, meh at least it will thin out the herd so to speak. What? That is exactly what they say about liberals and abortion.
Yutsano
They love their guns more than their own flesh and blood. It’s as simple as that.
Just Some Fuckhead
Sew a slot into your child’s favorite stuffed animal for a great place to stash a loaded handgun.
cathyx
I think under the pillow is a good spot.
scav
They’re still thinking small. There should clearly be a loaded semi in every room in the house (not omitting hallways and closets) so they are instantly available at a moments notice. Don’t omit the trunk in case carjackers bundle you into there while stealing your toddlers as you drive the womders to T-ball. Number one critical room in the house is actually the BATHROOM where you may have been so unwary as to take off your holster and body armor while showering.
SiubhanDuinne
@The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik:
They are not trolling. They are for real.
Southern Beale is going to be kept very busy, what with tracking all those “terrible accident,” “who could have foreseen?,”haven’t they suffered enough?,” “just cleaning it” and similar GODDAMN FUCKING LAME FAIL EXCUSES.
Fuck those fucking fucktards.
Chet
I don’t get it. If you have guns in your house, your kids know where they are anyway. Do you think your bedroom door is a magic force field? If you have kids, don’t fucking have guns in your house. If you have kids and guns, your guns better be in a safe they can’t open. And if they can’t open it, what the fuck does it matter what room the safe is in?
gnomedad
They are four fucking years old and absolutely can’t stand being told they shouldn’t do something. Now would be an excellent time to remind them (as another commenter suggested recently) of the dangers of running a car in a closed garage.
JPL
@Litlebritdifrnt: Let me be an asshole, politics doesn’t dictate who gets an abortion. Conservatives like to promote that fallacy, without any proof.
I hope that liberals are smart enough to keep a gun out of a child’s room and that makes me biased.
askew
Nothing the NRA does surprises me anymore. They are basically marketing arms for the gun manufacturers and these manufacturers have no shame. It’s similar to how the cigarette manufacturers were until they lost all those lawsuits. Remember all the ads marketed to children and telling us how cool smoking was?
I actually thought this link was going to be to a story about the Obama admin seriously considering arming Syrian rebels. That is a dumbfuck idea that will backfire on us for decades to come.
JPL
@gnomedad: You might have the solution. They could keep their guns in the garage with the car running.
Corner Stone
@askew:
What do you mean “basically”? S&W is the sponsor of the NRA Women’s recruiting initiative.
SiubhanDuinne
@SiubhanDuinne:
Added: Fuck them hard. Fuck them sideways.
I wish I knew a word more … energetic … than “fuck.” Because I would fucking use it.
Keith
By that logic, they should also move in next door to a cemetery.
lojasmo
@Chet:
When I had a firearm, my teen had no idea where I kept it locked up.’
You are a moron.
Corner Stone
@Chet:
That kind of practicality doesn’t lend itself very well to the outrage mongers here.
JWL
George “The Tall Coyote” Bush (The Elder)* possessed the decency to turn his back on the NRA after it declared federal marshals to be “jack booted thugs”. He did that many years ago.
Do any of today’s republicans possess a similar decency?
The question is, of course, rhetorical.
*(“There was one exact moment, in fact, when I knew for sure that Al Gore would Never be President of the United States, no matter what the experts were saying — and that was when the whole Bush family suddenly appeared on TV and openly scoffed at the idea of Gore winning Florida. It was Nonsense, said the Candidate, Utter nonsense. … Anybody who believed Bush had lost Florida was a Fool. The Media, all of them, were Liars & Dunces or treacherous whores trying to sabotage his victory.”).
Hunter “The Good Doctor” Thompson (RIP)
MattF
And, of course, the guns in every room would all have to be loaded, since you don’t want to be scrounging around for bullets during an emergency. And everyone would have to know where the guns are and how to shoot them. And when your five-year old points his finger at his little sister and says ‘BANG’, you should congratulate him for being brave and grownup.
That should about do it.
Corner Stone
@Just Some Fuckhead: They can stash it in the body cavity of their kids’ favorite stuffed animal. The Roo really packs a kick, eh mate?
the Conster
LOL @ fucktards.
scav
Children know what medicine cabinets are and can crawl up and get in there so why are we bothering with child-proof caps and not selling drugs to minors?
Corner Stone
@JWL:
When he picked Joe Lieberman as VP candidate? Yeah, I knew it was pretty much over then too.
JPL
What about carving out a large coffee table book. It’s not as though they are preaching reading is fundamental anymore.
gnomedad
@Corner Stone:
To Juicers who own firearms: do you make an effort to buy from a maker with the least noxious political affiliations? Do such exist?
scav
@Corner Stone: well, apart from having it in the room where the child has the most unsupervised time might have an unfortunate overlap with the odd moment someone forgets to lock it. But that would be outrage mongering so easily passed over.
Corner Stone
@gnomedad: An eco friendly gun manufacturer? Gun makers are in business to make the best product possible, and to move that product to as many potential buyers as possible.
This is a silly question.
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
@Just Some Fuckhead:
I’m getting the pig!
raven
@gnomedad: I have a japanese WWII rifle passed down to me and three weapons that my father owned.
Corner Stone
@scav: This is stupid. Sticking a gun safe in a child’s room?
Give me a break.
scav
@Corner Stone: Sorry for snark overload — I’m suffering from it myself.
Corner Stone
@JPL: I say a King James Bible with a nice .380 in there.
“So sayeth the Lord! Amen!”
Carl Nyberg
When I was home on leave from the Navy, I did run a home invader out of my parents house.
I awoke when the guy busted the basement door, which was under the room where I slept.
I went downstairs to investigate. I could see the flicker of a lighter illuminating the wall. I awoke my brother and told him to call 911.
The guy fled when he heard me.
I was nervous, but I didn’t feel like I needed a firearm to deal with the situation. And I don’t feel like a firearm or firearms in the house would have made me safer.
LeftCoastTom
@Corner Stone:
You know, for a second I wondered why the hell a seller of canned tomatoes would be sponsoring an “initiative” featuring products such as “boob holsters”.
I assume you meant someone less familiar.
Corner Stone
@scav: Really? Hmmm. I’m delirious otherwise, also, too.
Schlemizel
I think this is perfect – as long as they store all their ammo up their ass. Just to keep it safe
mai naem
I think people should store the gun in the diaper. With boys, it should have the gun facing the same way as the pen1s and hopefully it’ll discharge at the diaper changer’s face like the way the pen1s does sometimes.
Carl Nyberg
To me it’s weird for people to obsess over the possibility someone might break into their homes to do them harm.
This is an exceedingly rare form of crime (break-in and attack the occupants).
It seems like a willful ignorance of reality to think this is likely to be a problem for any given person.
But I suppose it is a way for the firearms industry to sell more product.
Ken
What I don’t get – probably because it’s the irrationality at the heart of it all – is that the same parents would not even consider storing cleaning supplies, knives, or even matches in their kids’ rooms, and probably many of them even put those little plugs in the electrical sockets.
Corner Stone
@LeftCoastTom: Smith & Wesson?
Atticus Dogsbody
@Chet: I didn’t even know my dad had a gun until 1996 (Aussie gun turn in) when I saw him leaving the house with a shotgun to take it down to the cop station. I would never had known if I hadn’t dropped by my parents house that day.
When I said “I didn’t know you had a gun.” His only reply was “That’s right.”
Corner Stone
@Carl Nyberg:
Compared to? Using what stats?
Mike in NC
A hollowed-out family Bible would make an excellent place to stash a loaded handgun with the safety off and a round in the chamber.
ETA: Corner Stone beat me to it…
JPL
@Corner Stone: There’s a yegg for that.
LeftCoastTom
@Carl Nyberg:
Well…sure. But these are people who have already paid some moron to testify before Congress that she needs “assault rifles” because their scary appearance will help her when she has 5-against-one firefights in her livingroom. Testimony that, in my view, should disqualify her from living outside of an institutional setting.
Corner Stone
@Atticus Dogsbody:
I think this is more dangerous than the alternative, frankly.
raven
@JPL: You gettin hammered over there again?
scav
apology retracted.
Corner Stone
@JPL: If my 8 yr old knows where to find one…I have bigger yeggs to fry.
LeftCoastTom
@Corner Stone: Yes, I got that…frankly, “S&W” as a seller of food is something I see a bit more often in my life than “Smith and Wesson”.
JPL
@raven: Just a nice little thunder storm.
JWL
Here is THE FULL quote in which ‘Tall Coyote’ is invoked– “the old man was the real tip off”..
Hunter Thompson On George W. Bush:
“There was one exact moment, in fact, when I knew for sure that Al Gore would never be President of the United States, no matter what the experts were saying — and that was when the whole Bush family suddenly appeared on TV and openly scoffed at the idea of Gore winning Florida. The old man was the real tip-off. The leer on his face was almost frightening. It was like looking into the eyes of a tall hyena* with a living sheep in its mouth. The sheep’s fate was sealed, and so was Al Gore’s.”
* (My heartfelt apology to coyotes everywhere for the initial misattribution).
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
@gnomedad: I inherited two Remington shotguns.
And I have to admit that I was very amused when the only other liberal working at my office at the time showed me what he’d bought his wife for Xmas.
raven
@JPL: I busted my butt in the rain for three hours, it cleared and I made it till five. I was bummed that it was nice but I ran out of gas.
Redshirt
The undersides of furniture is a great place to conceal a sawed off shotgun.
geg6
@Chet:
Huh. Well, my family must have been too stupid to live then. My dad had guns and he also had six kids. And none of us six had a clue as to where he kept his guns. As a young adult, I moved back in when I was going to grad school. That’s the first time he showed me where the guns were. And the only reason he showed me then was there was a serial killer running around the area at the time.
Corner Stone
@Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism: “Plus an abundance of the Cool Factor” ??
WT..F?
raven
@geg6: The only time I have loaded a weapon in the house was when a prof went off and shot his wife and two other people three blocks away. No one knew exactly what had happened, we just knew three people were dead and the dude was on the loose.
Villago Delenda Est
Well, you know, all these “guns within easy reach” ideas are just terrific for the merchants of death. After all, no house without at least two pistols and two rifles in each room is properly protected. Also, be sure to design houses with firearms sight lines as the primary consideration.
Librarian
@Mike in NC: I remember Robert Mitchum doing that in a movie where he played a minister in the old West.
Corner Stone
For those idiots who keep saying how responsible their parents were for owning guns but never telling them where they were, I have a big fucking fireproof safe my son would need a cracksman or a hell of a torch to get into. A pry bar wouldn’t work because of where it’s positioned.
He knows where every one of them is. And he has about as much chance of getting one as I do of kissing Salma Hayek goodnight.
Now, what if he found my stash one day when I wasn’t there and he hadn’t been warned about them?
This is stupid. Your parents were fucking foolish for playing roulette that you wouldn’t find a firearm one day when you were hunting for Sandy Claw’s stash.
Morons. Be fucking responsible.
Corner Stone
Shit. I used the term for a game where a person spins a little white ball round a wheel and now I’m moderated. Lovely.
Omnes Omnibus
@Villago Delenda Est: Interlocking fields of fire and Claymores in the dead spots?
Violet
In all the footage I saw from the NRA convention, I saw only one person who was non-white (and Asian male), and most were middle-aged men. Probably around 80% of the attendees in the footage. If they can’t figure out how to recruit younger, less white members then demographics are going to start being a real problem for them.
Citizen_X
@Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism: @Corner Stone:
It’s not truly a “weapon.” It’s a fashion, and political, statement.
Villago Delenda Est
@Omnes Omnibus:
Friend 15 blocks away has a howitzer registered on all your rooms.
Tom_B
@Corner Stone: blessed are the meek; they’re easier to pick off.
Chet
@geg6: I don’t know if your family is stupid, but you sure as shit are. By the time I was 10 I knew the location of every gun in the house, and all the ammunition. Never played with them, never even loaded them – because my dad had told me the story of how as a kid he’d nearly taken his sisters head off with his day’s unsecured service revolver – but, man, if you didn’t know where your parents kept stuff you’re just a grade A mouth breather.
Villago Delenda Est
@Citizen_X:
It’s more like “see my fetish, hear me squeak”.
JPL
@raven: I’m suppose to have some pine trees removed and the date keeps getting pushed back. The house I bought has a man made little pond that was put in wrong.
The easy fix is five hundred but to do it right would be thousands. I’m going to have it buried. I’m just not the type of person who wants to spend hundreds to hear the water fall. I hate GA Power already and don’t want to give them more money than I have to. I’ll have to do more landscaping but I enjoy that.
Omnes Omnibus
@Villago Delenda Est: A howitzer? I am worth at least a battery.
JCT
@Villago Delenda Est: I seem to recall Mike McLelland and his wife, Cynthia had loaded guns all over their house. Didn’t do shit for them.
This stuff is all make- believe “I can be the hero” bullshit. And the NRA just keeps ramping it up to keep the money flowing.
Omnes Omnibus
@Chet: Not everyone roots through their parents’ possessions.
Villago Delenda Est
@Corner Stone:
You mean one of those places with blackjack, hookers, and Robert Goulet in the lounge?
red dog
@Librarian: Great old flick “Elmer Gantry”
JWL
@Corner Stone: Yeah, no doubt about it. Gore’s VP pick unquestionably ranks as an egregious political fuck-up-for-the-ages.
Mnemosyne
@Chet:
We knew where my dad kept his guns — in a locked room that only he had a key to. The fact that your father had a traumatic experience and was still stupid enough to leave guns laying around for you to play with says a whole lot about your family.
Hungry Joe
I’ve been asking friends & acquaintances “Has there ever been a time in your life where you would have been better off if you’d had a gun?” (Not counting the military, of course.) Not a single affirmative, but two guys told me a similar story: They heard someone breaking into their house and at the time they wished they had a gun … and later were very glad they didn’t. One turned out to be a very drunk neighbor who thought his key didn’t work for some reason, and the other was a teenage wannabe burglar who thought no one was home and skedaddled when the lights went on.
I know I keep saying this, but I just can’t help myself: No one is going to break into your home and kill you. If you really want to keep your family safe, don’t have any guns in the house.
Litlebritdifrnt
@JPL: How many emerging critters are you going to murder doing that? How many frogs? How many dragonflies that have been overwintering in the safety of your pond?
SiubhanDuinne
@Chet:
To quote John Cole: For fuck’s sake.
LeftCoastTom
@Violet:
Their newly-elected President calls the 1860s…unpleasantness “The War of Northern Aggression”. He thinks all males should learn to use “military weapons”, while visibly displaying zero evidence that he could survive 24 hours in the military.
One of their board members is a serial poacher who sat in his own excrement for a week to avoid military service in a war that he does not otherwise criticize.
I’m thinking this is not news to the voters who, from recent polls, appear to be hating on Ayotte (R-NH), Begich (D-AK), and who appear OK with Toomey (R-PA) and Landrieu (D-LA).
Mnemosyne
@Hungry Joe:
I wouldn’t say it’s impossible, but you’re far more likely to be struck by lightning than to be the victim of murderous home invaders. Hell, you’re probably more likely to slip and fall in the bathtub and accidentally kill yourself than you are to have strangers break in to try and kill you.
Omnes Omnibus
@Hungry Joe: I was mugged once and afterwards an army buddy asked me if I had changed my mind about concealed carry. I told him that the last thing I wanted to introduce into a situation like that was a loaded weapon. I lost about $50 and had to get my credit cards and DL reissued. I also got two stitches near my eye. It was not worth either dying or killing over that.
Citizen_X
@Chet:
Perhaps you should not be questioning other people’s intelligence.
Just a suggestion.
joes527
@scav: leaving the gun safe in your child’s bedroom unlocked would be an isolated incident. You can’t count isolated incidents.
And besides, no true Scotsman would leave a gun safe unlocked in a child’s bedroom.
JPL
@Litlebritdifrnt: Are you my son?
That was the discussion today. Unfortunately, I have also been feeding heron by trying to keep fish in it.
Corner Stone
@Omnes Omnibus:
We’ve already worked out the fields of fire, but the damn in-ground sprinkler system plays absolute hell with positioning the claymores.
Plus, booby traps are automatic incarceration. Probably not a big deal if the zombie cheetocolypse happens and all but til then…
dewzke
Chet? What you portray is absolutely odd. People are talking about kids and guns in the house and you must have been smart one day….ballyhoo for you.
RSA
No, you’re seeing anti-stupidity pushback on that.
Hungry Joe
@Mnemosyne: You’re right — it’s not impossible. But someone in your family is far more likely to be injured or killed by the gun you keep than at the hands of a murderous home invader. All together, now: NO ONE IS GOING TO BREAK INTO YOUR HOME AND TRY TO KILL YOU.
@Omnes Omnibus: Exactly.
A Humble Lurker
@dewzke:
Assumes facts not in evidence.
Keith
I’m hoping history books cover the rise of contrarianism in America (“Grade school massacre? Put guns in ALL schools!” “5 year old caps 2 year old sister? Keep a loaded gun with your children!”). It’s so strange/frustrating to live through it, but I’m curious how future generations will look at this era.
Hungry Joe
@Mnemosyne: I think it sounded like I was disagreeing with you somehow, but I wasn’t. I tried to edit and was told I didn’t have the right. Yet another freedom lost to Obama, I guess.
Mnemosyne
@Hungry Joe:
Now that I think about it, it turned out that my dad did have one other gun (a handgun) that he kept locked in a safe in his bedroom closet. I had no idea he had it until I went to college and they were packing up to move out of that house.
He was smart enough to keep the liquor bottles on top of it, so none of us kids bothered to try and figure out the safe when there was liquor to be had.
dewzke
@A Humble Lurker: Trying to give the benefit of the doubt.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
@askew: The NRA gets money from each gun sold. Of course they are the marketing arm.
geg6
@Chet:
Me think thou dost project too much.
Why would I go looking around in my parents’ personal stuff and why would I want to find my dad’s guns? If we were going hunting or target shooting, he would provide the guns and take us. Unlike you, apparently, I took his lessons on gun safety seriously. Just because you were/are stupid enough to think guns were appropriate toys for hide and seek doesn’t mean it was okay. You are the kind of asshole that shouldn’t own guns if you think it’s fine for kids to rummage around in their parents’ belongings to find their guns without permission or supervision. Talk about mouth breathers.
YellowJournalism
@geg6: It’s a shame your parents taught you to respect their privacy. Think of all the fun you could have had going through their drawers!
Carl Nyberg
@Corner Stone:
Fighting off home invaders bent on physically harming occupants is a rare form of crime compared to real world problems that real people face on a regular basis.
Suzanne
@SiubhanDuinne:
This.
I have been home-invaded three times and not once has the invader ever even attempted to harm me or anyone I was living with. Just grabbed my stuff and took off. I’m insured, and gun-free, and LOVE IT.
El Cid
Why do we so foolishly separate “guns” from “non-guns”?
Why aren’t the legs of our furniture actually loaded firearms?
Why do we insist on having lamps and coat racks which aren’t firearms?
There should be a functional and loaded gun built into every sizeable and easily accessible object in the household, otherwise the commies have won.
CaseyL
I’m with Litlebritdifrnt. Wingnuts don’t “believe in” birth control or abortion, so the only way to thin that herd is to let them win one Darwin Award after another.
@Omnes Omnibus: I had a similar experience: someone was in my house, lurking, and I had to fight him off.
Had a lot of people say, “Now! Don’t you wish you had a gun??”
To which I replied, “I was in my PJs, brushing my teeth, when he came out of the bathtub at me. Why would I have been carrying a goddamn gun, and where would I have put the goddamn gun?”
(PS: Fought him off successfully, BTW, and had the satisfaction of slamming the fuck out of him with the bedroom door. Was he ever caught by the cops? No: this was Miami in the mid-1980’s, when the crime rate was so high cops didn’t bother with a case unless it involved multiple corpses and/or tons of cocaine.)
Tonal Crow
They’re trying to move the Overton Window. The problem is, they forgot about Overton Window Recoil.
Tonal Crow
@El Cid: Win.
Mr Stagger Lee
@Carl Nyberg: I think it is comical when a bunch of white guys in the exurbs or in the rural boondocks, think that the Bloods, Crips, or MS-13 will come out to their neck of the woods just to do some bad stuff to them. So they must have an arsenal that would rival the stuff Neo and Trinity had on the Matrix.
Roger Moore
@Corner Stone:
Bond. James Bond. I assume that’s where they’re coming from. Of course, that’s where I naturally go when I hear that gun mentioned. “A delivery like a brick through a plate glass window.”
Suzanne
@Chet: I lived with my grandparents as a kid, and they kept my great-grandfather’s WWI handgun in the house. They kept it hidden in a hope chest full of family heirlooms that I never looked at, because I wasn’t interested and I was told that those were their private things anyway. I didn’t know about it until I was fifteen, because I understood the basic concept of privacy, even as a kid. It’s really not hard.
Let me give you a hint: when visiting someone’s home, it’s considered impolite to go through your hosts’ dresser drawers. I’m sure that fact comes as a surprise to you. That’s probably why you’re never invited back.
Lee Rudolph
@Chet: Wait. You mean stashing your gun with your
othersex toys won’t keep the kids from finding it?Lee Rudolph
If you really need your guns in a hurry to prevent a home invasion, maybe you should consider keeping the guns out where you can get them fast, and put the kids in the safe.
Gex
I’m not quite sure why the right hates abortion. Seems like if it wasn’t already a thing, they’d invent it to make sure more kids die.
Roger Moore
@Lee Rudolph:
If you’re really worried about armed intruders breaking into your house, you should probably be more worried about your kids finding your large stash of narcotics, since drug dealers seem to be the main group for which it’s a realistic worry. Maybe the NRA members who are expressing these worries are revealing more than they’re willing to admit.
Corner Stone
@Carl Nyberg: You can keep repeating that. But I am going to keep asking you where your get the stats to base that assertion from.
Rare compared to what? And rare in what population/arena?
I live in a fantastic neighborhood these days and we had 6 high school age boys who kick entered their way into several blocks worth of homes before they were caught.
They were bored or whatever and kicked in the back door of homes they thought the people were at work.
Except some of them were not.
Obviously this does not happen all the time but to say it’s rare demands a stat or cite.
So give us one or shut the fuck up.
Brian
@Chet: do you have a kid? Is it common that kid plays alone in your room a lot? If so you are certainly in the minority. And that is why it matters.
Corner Stone
Listen people. Adults with firearms should be responsible. They should secure those firearms. Period.
Saying they hid them or placed them in private areas is the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard.
Because you know what? Kids find shit. And even if *your* kids don’t find shit, you know what? Their stupid fucking friends don’t give a flying fuck about your panty drawer privacy. they are drawn to it like a moth to a flame.
Stop saying this absolutely stupid mouth breathing level of moronosity.
If you own a firearm it is your responsibility to secure it.
There is no difference between your beloved grandpa hiding it in a drawer than Ms. Lanza leaving it where her son could access it.
None. Period.
Corner Stone
@Brian: I don’t even know what this means. What does this mean?
The Sailor
@Corner Stone: http://bjs.gov/content/pub/ascii/vdhb.txt
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/7769769
Corner Stone
@The Sailor: Thanks. I could access the bjs link but could not get the ncbi link for some reason.
The bjs link seems to indicate a million people a year were present during a break in and some smaller percentage were assaulted during those incidents.
It’s not an epidemic but it doesn’t seem like a whole lot of freakin fun either. I, personally, would not classify this as “rare”.
PIGL
@Suzanne:I think you word you mean is “burglary” or “breaking and entering” or “entering a dwelling house under cover of night”.
“Home invasion” is something that pants-wetting. gunbuggering, reichtards dreamed up to frighten the horses by making an ordinary and time-honoured crime seem extra special scary. Also, too, with extra NiCLANG.
Could we please stop using the word%
Mnemosyne
@The Sailor:
This was an interesting statistic in your first link:
As with so many crimes, you’re far more likely to be victimized by someone you already know than by a stranger.
Mnemosyne
@PIGL:
There is a bit of a definitional problem. Some sources seem to count any burglary where someone is in the house as a “home invasion” even if the burglar flees as soon as they see someone is at home. I think that when most people think of a “home invasion,” they think of something like In Cold Blood, where bad guys break into the house with the specific intent of murdering the inhabitants and also rob them as an afterthought.
El Cid
If it were truly a major societal factor (rather than a rarity blown up to larger-than-probable fear levels) that people had to continually defend against potential home invasions, maybe we ought to be doing something about the plague of home invasions instead of saying ‘hey maybe if everyone had guns and had them ready and had them everywhere it would help because one in a thousand times might result in a home being defended by a firearm.’
Just sayin’.
PIGL
@Mnemosyne: you are right, of course…home invasions in this “invasion of vampires” sense are vanishingly rare, though, so we should try not to call every witless thief a one of those.
Odie Hugh Manatee
If the safe uses a keypad for code entry it would be like having a deadly roulette wheel in the kids room.
Brilliant!
Odie Hugh Manatee
Hep me, ize bean modded fur BAD werds! :)
Suzanne
@PIGL: Sure, call it whatever you want. People were home, someone or some people broke in and stole shit. End of story.
Mustang Bobby
Marketing real guns for kids is along the same lines as putting Jack Daniel’s in a sippy cup so that kids can learn early on the joys of drinking and that just a little snort every so often — if done in moderation — is actually going to teach them how not to get shitfaced. Because kids know all there is to know about self-control.
My guess is that these people who are in favor of storing guns in their kids’ bedrooms are violently opposed to giving away condoms to high school kids or allowing 15-year-olds to get the morning-after pill because that will only teach them to have sex. Just a hunch.
scav
latest boy shoots sister whoops comes from FL, 13 yo shoots 6 yo, non-fatal and reported with a few stats, believe and corroborate at will.
GeriUpNorth
I wonder how many of those people who think they need a gun in their kid’s room in case of a home invasion have taken the steps of putting bars over their windows and having a reinforced door and an alarm system, you know, like people who live in regions where that might actually happen do.