I’m gonna disagree with DougJ about Ben Carson — he’s not the next Herman Cain, he’s the next Newt Gingrich. I bookmarked this Washington Post article last night:
BALTIMORE — The voice mail greeting at Benjamin Carson’s Johns Hopkins Hospital office, where he is the director of pediatric neurosurgery, stretches for almost eight minutes…
Carson’s voice mail greeting, which has been growing in 20-second increments for almost two decades, reflects the many identities that he has added through the years. The list includes world renowned neurosurgeon, author, speaker, inner-city folk hero, role model to evangelical Christians and, most recently, rising conservative political star.
His latest brush with fame followed the prayer breakfast speech in which he criticized the president’s health-care overhaul, called for a flat tax and warned that the enforcers of political correctness had put a dangerous “muzzle” on debate in the country. To the delight of conservatives, Carson delivered the address with a stone-faced President Obama sitting a few yards away.
Within days of his remarks, Carson was being touted as a possible presidential candidate by the Wall Street Journal. He got one of the most enthusiastic receptions at the recently held Conservative Political Action Conference, where he stoked speculation that he may, just may, be willing to run for president.
After a several-day onslaught from fans and the media, many wanting to know his potential political plans, Carson has eased away from suggestions he may have his eyes on the White House. The 61-year-old doctor now says the likelihood of a presidential run is “incredibly small.” What he really wants is a second career in television when he retires from Johns Hopkins later this year…
Remember, the WaPo tends to interpret politics in business terms — politics is the money product of its company town, so they don’t have the NYT‘s airy philosopher-king approach to every new idea and/or candidate. I’m sure Dr. Carson is a very godly man, and it’s totally coincidental that the God he worships seems to agree with everything Dr. Carson says. The GOP’s latest Great Not-Obama Hope doesn’t want to run for President, but he might just settle for being chosen Prophet-King, if enough people ask him nicely…
Seriously, Carson’s been on the bookmongering/motivational-speaking circuit for some years already, and the Republican clown-car primaries during the 2012 campaign made it clear that GOP voters are starved for quality entertainment “uplift” at which to throw their money. He’s not as — what’s the polite phrasing? charismatic? — as the Giant Albino Amphibian, but on the other hand, the odds of him having a stream of sexual & financial peccadillos to amuse the sneering Dems are a lot lower. Quite possibly the Koch brothers or Foster ‘Aspirin’ Friess could be persuaded to fund, if not a talk show, at least a Glenn-Beck-style performance tour with state-of-the-art technology and top-of-the-scale amenities, just to demonstrate they’ve found One of the Good Ones. Much nicer, for a little retirement jaunt, than an RV tour of Walmart parking lots.
schrodinger's cat
GOP = Grifting old Party of snake-oil salesmen (and occasionally, women)
Derelict
So the latest conservative hero turns out to be a grifter just like all the others.
Who’da thunk?
Boots Day
My wingnut dad recently posted on Facebook that Carson had, ominously, claimed that after his highly political speech at the national prayer breakfast, certain people had criticized him specifically for talking about God and the bible. Given the incredible heights of naivete required to believe that, I have to think that Dr. Carson’s relationship with the truth is probably close to Gingrichian.
BGinCHI
Is the fantasy of the GOP that if they run a black or brown man they will get all the black and/or brown votes?
Seriously?
Have they considered that they might lose more white votes than they could ever gain by that stupid strategy?
Have they ever heard of policy?
The Moar You Know
How come all the people who badmouth welfare want to be on it so badly?
Snarki, child of Loki
“Ben Carson — he’s not the next Herman Cain, he’s the next Newt Gingrich.”
No way! The Universe isn’t big enough to contain TWO egos that large.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
No good Republicans ever wants to run for President (at least that’s what led some of the Republicans I know to have supported Bush). Either God or Corporation delivers its holy message that the person should run, and whose going to deny the will of God/Money.
JGabriel
Don’t CPAC-made conservative stars have a shelf life of about year, tops?
I can’t think of anyone who made their first splash at CPAC and was still a player or successful pol/pundit/etc. over a year later.
.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
@BGinCHI: What would be the point of policy? Government doesn’t work, remember?
c u n d gulag
Just like in a police line-up, any N*gger in a pinch!
The Republicans sure do LOOOOOOOOOOOVES them some self-hating minorities.
And the self-hating minorities, sure do LOOOOOOOOOOOVES them the Republican Party.
One side hopes to get votes – the other side’s in it for the money – and any vestigial power.
I only wish I was a minority, so that I could hate myself enough to fame and fortune!
dmsilev
As the boundless electoral success of Alan Keyes proves, the GOP definitely should keep doubling down on their minority outreach strategy.
Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)
Gophers finish the season with an NCAA championship.
41-0-0
Woodrowfan
@Boots Day: Did you ask your Dad why he’d think someone would criticize a speaker for talking about religion at a prayer breakfast??
BGinCHI
@Belafon (formerly anonevent): It’s like they are working really hard to convert to a religion they avowedly do not believe in.
It’s hard to find a proper analogy.
Wag
@JGabriel:
This.
askew
So, Mark Warner has now come out for Same Sex Marriage. It’s amazing to see how fast this has shift from when pundits were declaring Obama’s re-election DOA after he came out for SSM. Not sure if Warner is doing this for his Senate re-election or if he really is planning on running for President in 2016.
Roger Moore
@BGinCHI:
Even more amazing is the fantasy that they won’t lose a lot of racist white votes. I don’t think those racist whites will necessarily vote for the other guy, but they might refuse to vote for either candidate.
kindness
Why is it that Republicans are so over the top when pushing their non-racist cred by making nut case black men the (momentary) point of their existence.
OK, sure, the MSM will bite any hook that comes their way but the rest of us understand looney. Michael Steel, Herman Cain & now this guy. They are all grifters and nuts.
ruemara
I think these guys are decoys sent out by the Blacks®, so every wingnut can have a new black best friend to prove they aren’t Ray Cist. Since inevitably, the official black person with the sanctioned programming will in some way fail to be perfectly conservative in every way, a new black bestie has to be rolled out every 18 to 24 months. Don’t say I told you so or they’ll bar me from the monthly meetings and I could miss the early zombie warning memos and get stuck with you pale bastards come the zombie apocalypse. And then I’d have to start shooting on principle.
MattF
Open thread, so I can post a link to the magnificent Venn Diagram Of Irrational Nonsense (via jwz):
http://crispian-jago.blogspot.com/2013/03/the-venn-diagram-of-irrational-nonsense.html
Yutsano
I just got called a Republican by a taxpayer. As if that was the worst insult she could come up with on short notice. I died larfing since of course she has no clue.
dmsilev
@Yutsano: You have to admit, that is a pretty nasty thing to accuse someone of.
GregB
If the GOP nominates Dr. Carson they’ll lose the Zimmerman family vote for sure.
Yutsano
@dmsilev: If I wasn’t at work I’d bother to be insulted. Instead it was just so off the wall I had to die laughing after I got off the phone with her.
Omnes Omnibus
@Yutsano: Were you lowering her taxes or probing her vagina?
Bruce s
@Snarki, child of Loki:
You mean he’s been Trumped?
Todd
OT – Possibly the saddest display I’ve ever seen. The drawing power of Real True Conservatism
http://www.goodeforpresident2012.com/photos.html
Roger Moore
@Omnes Omnibus:
Considering where Yutsano works, I’m guessing that she wasn’t mad at him for lowering her taxes. Besides, everyone knows those lower tax rates only apply to the 1%; the rest of us are going to lose our favorite deductions to pay for their rate decreases.
SatanicPanic
Are the pundits going to like Carson so much when they figure out he’s angling for their job?
Omnes Omnibus
@Roger Moore: But I tend to doubt he was probing her either. What else do Republicans do?
Redshift
@Boots Day:
What do you bet that (assuming the story isn’t completely made up) that people criticized Carson for using God and the Bible to advocate for policies diametrically opposed to what the Bible says, and he chose to report this as “certain people had criticized him specifically for talking about God and the bible”?
Violet
Speaking of Republican stars who really want a TV show, check out these photos of Sarah Palin at a basketball game. (Link goes to Daily Mail.) The Palin fansite “Palin4President” claims the top photo is “Almost too hot to publish” (seriously?), but the bottom photo shows just how far her looks have faded. And would it kill her to use a brush or a comb?
Side note, the Palin fansite got pissed off when people posted mean comments about her, so the owner posted all the emails of the mean comment posters so people could go harrass them. Seriously. Talk about a thin skin.
Redshift
@askew:
Just as a guess, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s doing it now for purposes of Virginia politics, since we have a gubernatorial election this year. Warner’s pretty much the most popular Virginia politician, and not just with Democrats; if he can shift the mainstream to make the wingnut Cuccinelli (and whoever they pick for LG and AG) look even more extreme, it’ll benefit the Democratic ticket.
The Moar You Know
@Yutsano: Shit, I think that’s “ten paces, turn and fire” level of insult right there.
The obvious one, and I’m very surprised it hasn’t happened to you yet, is that you’ll be called a Democrat.
Bubblegum Tate
@MattF:
That is a work of art.
MattF
@Redshift: I suppose that if he wasn’t being ‘persecuted’ for his ‘beliefs’, he wouldn’t qualify as a ‘conservative.’ FWIW, you could probably put quotes around all the other words in that sentence. I’m off, now, to go persecute a salami sandwich– need to keep in practice in preparation for 2016.
Comrade Dread
For all of the talk about trusting in God, a great many conservatives within the church see hobgoblins around every corner.
Keith G
What? We should two have posts about this putz today? Oy!
danimal
AL:
Distinction without a difference. Both, after all, ran campaigns to
boost their speaker’s feesadd a needed voice to the GOP primary field.Boots Day
@Woodrowfan: It just goes to show you how EEee-vil those Democrats are, and how much they hate God. Seriously, they would believe anything. If there was a story going around about how Chelsea Clinton ate raw babies for breakfast, they would believe it.
Splitting Image
I’d say that given his religious bona fides, Dr. Carson is a cross between Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum. Which means that he can be his own unity ticket if Mitt Romney decides to run again, and he can probably dispense with choosing a Vice-Presidential candidate.
Look out Democrat party. Carson 2016!
Roger Moore
@Omnes Omnibus:
Act unreasonable? Screw over the working class? Act holier than thou? I can definitely understand somebody accusing Yutsano (working in his official capacity) of the first two, though not the third.
Trakker
Poor Dr. Carson. He’s basking in the adulation of bigots, not realizing they love him only as long as he never gets too close to capturing the Presidential nomination. If he starts winning too many primaries his popularity will soon drop like a rock. They don’t want a black President, just a token they can point to and scream, “See, we don’t hate Obama ’cause he’s black!!!!” Ironically, Carson’s using the GOP to boost his ego and the GOP is using him as cover. And neither realize it…
Jebediah
@Boots Day:
And that is so wrong! It was lunch, and they were thoroughly cooked.
Suffern ACE
They were excited about Ben Carson’s plan to not only rid us of the burden of medicare, medicaid and Obamacare, but to end the entire idea of employer-based insurance to boot. Yay! Healthcare savings accounts!
ruemara
sitting here in a blonde wig and gold eyepatch, wondering where my life went wrong. If I could spout these neocon talking points without laughing myself hoarse, I’d try it. It doesn’t hurt anything but your soul.
WereBear
On some level, I think they do. Which is where the self-hate comes in.
If anyone ever wonders if selling out is “worth it,” just check out Justice Clarence Thomas. He never opens his mouth in court, his wife leaves nasty phone messages, and so it’s no wonder he never looks happy.
Got everything he wanted… but I bet it didn’t turn out the way he planned.
Cygil
BALTIMORE — The voice mail greeting at Benjamin Carson’s Johns Hopkins Hospital office, where he is the director of pediatric neurosurgery, stretches for almost eight minutes…
I think many people would be shocked if they realized just how many of our high fliers are motivated purely by pure, rabid, untrammelled flaming narcissism. They don’t even realize they aren’t normal….
Omnes Omnibus
@Roger Moore:
That is probably the one she she was going for.
Yutsano
@Roger Moore: It was number 1 & number 2, or at least squeezing out our senior citizens. I don’t do holier than thou though.
raven
@Omnes Omnibus: You seen the story where the VFW and Legion are freaking out because some stupid “Great Race” episode in the Nam used a downed B-52 memorial as a landmark?
Ruckus
@The Moar You Know:
Welfare for me not thee. Besides conservatard welfare is privately funded(from the money rich bastards don’t pay in taxes)
GregB
@raven:
That was the controversy?
Oofah.
Are they upset there are no memorials to General Westmoreland too?
Michael
Don’t know if this has already been posted, but our venerable blog host’s home state may make pepperoni rolls its official state food. Good stuff
Baud
@raven:
Didn’t they support McCain, who’s scuttled many a plane?
Roger Moore
@Yutsano:
You don’t seem like the firebagger type.
Ruckus
@BGinCHI:
It’s hard to find a proper analogy.
There really are no analogies talking about conservatards that aren’t covered by or needed after the words “gross stupidity”.
Ruckus
@ruemara:
LOLZ
Ben Franklin
@Yutsano:
I don’t do holier than thou though.
Not as far as you would know…
TCG
Of course the wingnuts think us libtards are afraid of Dr. Carson just like we were afraid of Palin.
Zapruder F. Mashtots, D.D.S. (formerly Mumphrey, et al.)
Wasn’t this the clown who ran that gathering at the nuthouse conservative convention a week ago, the gathering where the asshole said that Frederick Douglass was a lazy, thankless leech for not appreciating that his owner was spending a lot of hard earned money feeding, housing and clothing Douglass? (Just whose hard labor went into feeding, housing and clothing him went unremarked on.) In the unlikely event that this asshole Carson gets to be a big player, the Democrats should run the two minutes of that little chat around the clock.
Zapruder F. Mashtots, D.D.S. (formerly Mumphrey, et al.)
@TCG:
Well, we were scared of Palin, at least I was. I mean, well, they thought we were scared of running against her, even though what scared us was the thought of what she’d do if she ever found herself in office. A small difference there, but it still means something, though that’s lost on the Republicans.
capybroa
Beautiful. Elegant, succinct, and fluid. Stuff like this is what keeps me coming back to Balloon Juice.