James O’Keefe Apologizes (Not Really)

Kudos to Wonkette‘s Matthew Phelan and Liz Farkas for breaking the news that human turd James O’Keefe has once again bobbed to the surface:

James O’Keefe—the blonde bombshell who set the conservative world of hidden-camera YouTube movies ablaze—has just agreed to a $100,000 settlement to calm down the unjustly fired (and weirdly litigious about it) ACORN employee Juan Carlos Vera. According to a copy of the deal, obtained late last night by your wonkettes and viewable after the jump, O’Keefe has also agreed to ink an 11-word non-apology apology, that sources close to reality are calling “insincere” and “suuuuuuuch bullshit.”

According to the final 5-page agreement, signed by O’Keefe and his legal counsel Mike Madigan this past Tuesday, the boy detective now publicly “regrets any pain suffered by Mr. Vera or his family.” O’Keefe and his counsel have also consented to fork over the $100,000 within 30 business days of the settlement agreement’s being signed…

…[A]s Vera’s attorney Gene Iredale suggested to us in a telephone interview, O’Keefe’s willingness to pay this exorbitant sum is, by itself, a tacit admission of guilt. The sum is $35,000 more than James received from Andrew Breitbart for his “life rights” based on the top-shelf (derp-derp) quality of the ACORN videos in the first place. So, a limited amount of justice has been served.

It is also illuminating to know that O’Keefe and his handlers have determined that it was worth at least $100,000 to avoid publicly losing a court case, and thus further tarnishing the James O’Keefe “folk hero” fundraising brand with a guilty verdict directly related to sloppy journalism. If you do the math, this diversion of funds could have paid for two Project Veritas “investigations” on the scale of their seemingly never-ending Voter ID project last year…

Much more detail & illumination at the link (it’s Friday. Go read it!)

So, having been exposed as a dishonest grifter, of course O’Keefe has now resolved to go and sin no more, right? Yeah, right.

I’m really, really looking forward to seeing Shirley Sherrod‘s lawyers examine this little weasel. (And scrub their hands thoroughly afterwards, for safety’s sake.)

36 replies
  1. 1
    Baud says:

    Wow, Anne. I called you and you came. One of us is amazing. (Hint: It’s not me.)

  2. 2
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    and Anne Laurie steps on Cole for a change!

    kidding, kidding

    It is also illuminating to know that O’Keefe and his handlers have determined that it was worth at least $100,000 to avoid publicly losing a court case,

    IANAL, but might O’Keefe’s patrons also be looking to avoid having to answer questions in such a case? about who paid for what, and releasing the complete tapes? and can more ACORN employees go after him/them?

  3. 3
    Roger Moore says:

    And scrub their hands thoroughly afterwards, for safety’s sake.

    As thoroughly as the guys who found the gun ABL posted about yesterday.

  4. 4
    jl says:

    The plaintiff is the ACORN staffer who tried to turn in O’Keefe and his accomplice for sex trafficking, right? And who O’Keefe represented as willing to assist, right?

    So, I am not interested in what this scumbag O’Keefe has to say.

  5. 5
    Anne Laurie says:

    @efgoldman: Sherrod’s lawsuit against Breitbart’s estate is ongoing, AFAICT. One assumes O’Keefe, as the individual responsible for producing the doctored tape, will have to testify at some point, but I’d be more than happy to hear from an actual lawyer about this.

  6. 6
    Hungry Joe says:

    What’s fascinating about O’Keefe is that the guy’s got nothing — no talent, no presence, no looks, no brains. Other, similar weasels at least have something identifiable going for them; Tucker Carlson, for example, has money and family connections. O’Keefe was the C student who was also a dweeby jerk when anybody paid any attention to him, which was pretty much never. Yet here he is, a national figure. Discredited time and again, sure, but still, here he is. I find it so … odd.

  7. 7
    gbear says:

    Isn’t O’Keefe on probation? Why isn’t he in jail yet?

  8. 8
    Misterpuff says:

    So does the douche have 100Large for every ACORN employee that lost their jobs due to his hit job on ACORN?

    ’cause that would be sweet (and a fair use for cash from the Wingnut Welfare Faucet)

  9. 9
    the Conster says:

    @Hungry Joe:

    He’s got nothing, so he’s got nothing to lose by being a soulless ugly hack for filthy lucre. You don’t see many people put themselves out there so shamelessly, and on some level he seems to understand that this is his only path to something, which is more than the nothing that he really is.

  10. 10
    The Sailor says:

    O’Queef’s lawyer has already stated it was to settle a “nuisance lawsuit”.

    INAL, but isn’t that in violation of the agreement that included an apology?

  11. 11
    danielx says:

    James O’Keefe: voted most likely to be raped in prison* by his graduating class. Not that I’d wish the little shit any ill…

    *Yes, I realize it’s no joking matter. Neither is James O’Keefe.

  12. 12
    NotMax says:

    having been exposed as a dishonest grifter,

    What other kind is there?

    Akin to describing a round circle.

    /green-eyeshade wearing editor within

  13. 13
    Narcissus says:

    @danielx: There aren’t any barns or boats in prison dude

  14. 14
    dedc79 says:

    I’m only surprised (and sorry) that they couldn’t get more than that from him. It would’ve cost significantly more than $100,000 to try that case.

  15. 15
    sophronia says:

    Are they going after any of the other human waste involved in the making of these videos? As a longtime observer of the nightmare that is Doug Giles, alleged man of God, I’d love to see his daughter’s career as wingnut welfare queen brought to a quick end.

  16. 16
    Woodrowfan says:

    @Hungry Joe: He’s good at being a troll, at thinking up stunts to piss people off. Basically he’s a professional asshole.

  17. 17
    TheOtherWA says:

    The raw tapes of the O’Keeffe escapade in CA Acorn offices were released by the California AG’s office in April 2010. O’Keefe had to turn them over to avoid criminal charges for recording someone without their permission.

    But new, unedited videotapes discovered through Brown’s investigation, as well as other evidence, shed clearer light on interactions between O’Keefe and the now-defunct ACORN.

    The news release has links to the raw footage, if you want to download it for yourself.

    AFAIK, Rachel Maddow was the only one who reported on the raw footage.

  18. 18
    James E. Powell says:

    The Democratic Upper Echelons were fine with killing off ACORN because in their hearts they despise the activists on the left end of the line. They similarly rushed to condemn MoveOn because no one can ever criticize a general no matter what he says or does. This is, after all, the last best hope of mankind.

  19. 19
    Rosie Outlook says:

    Who is Doug Giles and who is his daughter?

    And how many times does O’Keefe get to violate his parole before his sorry ass is sent to prison?

  20. 20
    sophronia says:

    Oops, just reread the article and found the link to Giles’s settlement. Reading comprehension, yay.

  21. 21
    TheOtherWA says:

    Here’s the Rachel Maddow segment in all it’s plain truth glory. YouTube

  22. 22
    TheOtherWA says:

    The link for the CA AG’s news release didn’t show up, so I’ll try it again.

  23. 23
    pseudonymous in nc says:

    Doesn’t matter: O’Queef is a made man in the ratfucking business, and there will always be someone willing to pay his ratfucking bills. It’s not as if going to jail ends a wingnut ratfucker’s career.

  24. 24
    Jay says:

    O’Keefe puts on those sunglasses of his and he looks like a sex offender.

    Every time. Every. Bloody. Time.

  25. 25
    maus says:

    @Hungry Joe: “What’s fascinating about O’Keefe is that the guy’s got nothing”

    Well-connected parents will get you through life.

  26. 26
    marshall says:

    weirdly litigious


    What’s supposed to be weird about it? I am sure he wants revenge, and he did get $ 100,000 for his efforts.

  27. 27
    KS in MA says:

    @Hungry Joe: Just think of Donald Segretti.

  28. 28
    KCinDC says:

    The fact that O’Keefe, after his various plots—including conspiring to tamper with a senator’s phone system—is not in prison shows that Obama is incredibly bad at being a tyrant.

  29. 29
    SarahT says:

    Fine so far as it goes, but unless all former ACORN employees – and all those in the low-income communities ACORN served – get to line up and take turns punching O’Keefe in the neck, justice will not be done.

  30. 30
    YellowJournalism says:

    @SarahT: Do you have to be a former ACORN employee to wait in line for that, or can you just join in because you think the guy is a smarmy, dishonest yak’s butthole?

  31. 31
    TheWilyOne says:

    $100k? I’m sure O’Keefe’s patrons consider ACORN’s death an excellent return on investment. O’Keefe won this round big time.

  32. 32
    Cygil says:

    Don’t settle for less than a million, Ms. Sherrod. You can take this bastard for all he’s worth.

  33. 33
    Linda Featheringill says:

    Good morning.

    O’Keefe is young to be so strange. And to be such a loser with women. He’s 26, according to google.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if he slid into even more obvious difficulties with reality.

  34. 34
    WereBear says:

    @Linda Featheringill: I see that “loser with women” thing as part of their brand.

    Why women must be oppressed, after all.

  35. 35
    Ricardo says:

    “…human turd James O’Keefe” is overly generous; “turd James O’Keefe” is better.

  36. 36
    gvg says:

    ACORN didn’t get defended by lefties well because plenty of very active democrats I know thought they were a bit shady on voter registration efforts anyway. Basically the pay structure encouraged fake registrations by employees-made up ones to meet quotas, not anything that would ever result in fake votes. they had been repeatedly cited for that but did nothing to fix it. So since they were not actually well regarded, they didn’t get defended.

    This case happened before O’Keefe got caught trying to bug the congress womans office and put on probation so it can’t count as violating probation. I’m sure he’ll do something else. He seems not to have much common sense. The probation was supposedly because his parents were important or rich but lately stories are he doesn’t have connections??? don’t know which is correct.

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