176 replies
  1. 1
    cay says:

    Tell her you have a blog. No, wait…

  2. 2
    Spaghetti Lee says:

    Hooray for Midnight drunk posting!

  3. 3
    RoonieRoo says:

    Austin will do that to you. It’s a surprising city. This Austinite is having an insomnia attack tonight. I’m glad to hear someone is at least having fun down here. I sure am not.

  4. 4
    Joseph Nobles says:

    Bora Bora is a great place for a honeymoon.

  5. 5
    Joey Maloney says:

    I hear Tora Bora is also lovely this time of year. #notintendedtobeafactualstatement

  6. 6
    SRW1 says:

    Give yourselves a chance if she met you as well.

  7. 7
    Narcissus says:

    Wait so that chick from a few months back was your sister?

    eww man

  8. 8
    rda909 says:

    Bqhatevwr, dude. We want pictures.

  9. 9
    Alison says:



    /feminist pedant

    :P But seriously, have fun, dude.

  10. 10
    RobertDSC-eMac 1.25 says:

    LOL. Wait until Tunch gets a hold of her.

  11. 11
    Anne Laurie says:

    “How nice for you!”

  12. 12
    amk says:

    For the last time dood, tunch is not a girl.

    Oh, you meant Zsa Zsa?

  13. 13
    Fordpowers says:


  14. 14
    Sphex says:

    Delurking to say: this is the kind of optimism I can only get at BJ. :)

  15. 15
    dance around in your bones says:

    Wait, what does this mean? What’s the arrow thing all about? Does she know you are telling your 1000 closest friends about her? And that they will all be irresponsibly speculating on the sexytime?

    Also, why am I still awake?

  16. 16
    NotMax says:

    So now Mr. Cole is reduced to doing Jethro Beaudine impressions?

    The horror, the horror.

    On the plus side, presumably he brought pants along on this trip.

  17. 17
    MeDrewNotYou says:

    @dance around in your bones: If there’s one thing I know about women (and I’m a freakin’ expert!), its that they love the idea of hundreds of total strangers intensely curious about what’s going on with their vaginas. Cole should be in like Flynn, as it were.

    Otherwise, where else are all those GOP voters with their strange obsession coming from? Admit it, it makes total sense.

  18. 18
  19. 19
    raven says:

    @dance around in your bones: So you were born where, Aurora, Naperville, Waugegan?

  20. 20
    dance around in your bones says:


    Well, I’m a wymen and I don’t want 1000 peeps speculating (see what I did there?) about what’s all up in my hoo-ha. Cole better be careful about his drunk posting ;)

    @raven: Berwyn, Illinois. Find THAT on a map!

    eta: just checked Cole’s Twitter feed – at least he’s not tweeting about whatever the heck is happening.

  21. 21
    raven says:

    @dance around in your bones: I’m from Villa Park, I found it all the time when my old man was a teacher in Berkely-Bellwod.

  22. 22
    dance around in your bones says:

    Well, hell – we could have been playmates! Only I left there at age 5 or so.

  23. 23
    raven says:

    @dance around in your bones: My dad was raised there. We moved from North Chicago to LA in 57. My folks split-up and I moved back (was basically kidnapped by my old man) to VP in 61. Stayed until after my Jr year of high school and then into the big green machine.

  24. 24
    cbear says:


    That’s great, John.
    Someone alert the media.

  25. 25
    dance around in your bones says:

    @raven: Well, as I said previously, we left Berwyn in about ’58? for Nuevo Mexico. Thank Gawd.

    I love New Mexico. Still have family there, may have to move out of this hellhole Santa Barbara (kidding! – it’s beautiful here). Plus, the ocean. But – Hatch green chiles! and sopapillas with honey! It’s a toss-up.

    eta: so sorry you got sucked into the green machine. Glad you made it back,

  26. 26
    Alex S. says:

    Did you just meet her, or also talk to her?

  27. 27
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    You’re from Berwyn? I know exactly where that is. I was born and raised in Oak Park.

  28. 28
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    Oh, never mind. I was all set for a rousing game of “Did You Know and Do You Remember?” but just saw that you left the area at an early age (and we’re half a generation apart in age anyhow, so there would be few shared memories).

  29. 29
    dance around in your bones says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: Yes, I was born there. Lots of family from the Chicago area.

    My dad has been a lifelong Cubs fan, poor fellow.

    I remember getting lost in the Brookfield Zoo, following some guy who had a shirt on that looked like my dad’s. Zoo police (or whatever equivalent) found me sobbing on the lawn, took me to the lost and found kid Dept(?) and fed me ice cream until my frantic parental units showed up to claim me.

  30. 30
    MeDrewNotYou says:

    @raven: I think the saying refers to Errol Flynn.

  31. 31
    WereBear says:

    The arrow is pointing the wrong way? This must be some “girl”!

  32. 32
    PeakVT says:

    Wevs. I just want to know where I can get a live feed of your pets tearing up your house while you are away.

  33. 33
    dance around in your bones says:


    Perhaps raven was thinking of the movie In Like Flint. I know I did!

  34. 34
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    Well, I have a slew of Brookfield Zoo memories, although I don’t think any of us ever got lost. There were five of us kids, and the invariable, and much-reiterated rule, was that if anybody got separated we were to go back to the main entrance and WAIT THERE.

  35. 35
    Face says:

    I guess thats better than meeting a guy. Or meeting a guy you thawt was a gurl. Or meeting the police captain down at the station.

  36. 36
    MeDrewNotYou says:

    @dance around in your bones: I just now caught your joke (Hey, I’ve been up all night.). Hilarious!

  37. 37

    Yet another in a string of unsuspecting women he can lure to his cave of horror and animals. We can look forward to more photos of her sitting on the couch watching Tunch sit on the couch, playing hours and hours of video games and eating delightfully prepared meat products.

    I, for one, am excited about this prospect!

  38. 38
    dance around in your bones says:


    I woke up in a Soho doorway, and a policeman knew my name – he said you can go home and sleep tonight if you can get up and walk away…

    Of course, Lola might be appropriate, too!

    (still can’t figure out how to embed links in edit mode :(

  39. 39
    Anne Laurie says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    I remember getting lost in the Brookfield Zoo, following some guy who had a shirt on that looked like my dad’s. Zoo police (or whatever equivalent) found me sobbing on the lawn, took me to the lost and found kid Dept(?) and fed me ice cream until my frantic parental units showed up to claim me.

    Ha, I remember misplacing my dad at the Bronx Zoo (still one of my favorite places on Earth), age around 4, and being tearfully furious at the zoo personnel who kept asking if I was ‘lost’. I knew exactly where I was (the Horns & Hides Building)! It wasn’t my fault my old man wandered off! (Probably, in retrospect, in pursuit of my 2-1/2 year old brother… )

  40. 40
    PeakVT says:

    Speaking of streaming, SpaceX has live coverage of the Dragon module docking with the ISS. Right now the module has been captured with the Canadarm2 and the actual docking maneuver is coming up.

  41. 41
    Punchy says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: I’m from Arlington Heights….

  42. 42
    Linda Featheringill says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    Hey, dance! Still up? How the heckola are ya?

  43. 43
    Keith G says:

    So you met a “girl” late night in Austin.


    Is she a policewoman or an ER technician?

  44. 44
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    @Keith G:

    Is she a policewoman or an ER technician?

    Fingers crossed that ‘Paramedic’ is not the answer to that.

  45. 45
    dance around in your bones says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: An excellent plan. Unfortunately I was blindly following a plaid shirt.

    @Face: That was a crappy version of Lola. Maybe this one is better.

    @Anne Laurie (think my link limit has run out)

    That’s funny.You had ‘situational awareness’ (to borrow an old B.O.B. term), right? I was just fucking lost. Dang plaid shirt.

    eta: Keith Moon always looked like he was having so much fun. Sad the way he ended up, but at least he had fun on the life trip.

  46. 46
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Linda Featheringill: Yep! Still up and kickin’ it! Heck, the sun is going to be coming up pretty soon – I have no idea why I am still awake…

    My best friend was just here visiting for a couple of weeks and my mom – whom I haven’t seen for too many years – is coming to visit next week.

    So, life is good! Thanks for asking :)

  47. 47

    Mazel tov! I think.

  48. 48
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Punchy: I think there’s a bunch of us here at Balloon Juice who spent formative years in Chicagoland.

  49. 49
    Rosie Outlook says:

    …and then he told her that his interests include video games, blogging, heavy drinking, and naked mopping.

    Back to the pet stories.

  50. 50
    Raven says:

    Sun is up, it’s 27 degrees and the coffee is hot! I’ve sat outside every day for 10 years at this bakery and people still say “wow it’s so cold, how do you do it!”

  51. 51
    Schlemizel says:


    Assuming facts not in evidence!

    Maybe Coles former life as a Republican left a vestigial thing for little girls!

    eww – sorry JC I hadda do it.

    Good luck, maybe we’ll all see a brightening of your disposition & it will be a win-win-win

  52. 52
    WereBear says:

    @Raven: I tell them I have antifreeze in my blood :)

    But while it is a rare quality, apparently, I’m one of those folks who really dislike heat.

  53. 53
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:


    But while it is a rare quality, apparently, I’m one of those folks who really dislike heat.

    My wife and I are sadly on opposite ends of that spectrum. She’s comfortable with the house at 58 degrees year round. I’ll happily do heavy labor when it’s 100 degrees out as long as there’s enough water. Most couples argue over money. We have a sullen stalemate over the thermostat.

  54. 54
    Schlemizel says:


    The only problem I would have with that is how can the coffee stay hot? I hate lukewarm coffee.

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:
    While not as extreme as yours we have something similar in my house too. I have taken to wearing hoodies, often with a thermal top underneath around here.

  55. 55
    chris says:

    Born and raised in Palatine, family everywhere from Lake Bluff to McHenry, Arlington Heights, Rolling Meadows, St. Charles, Barrington. Came from Rogers Park/Evanston

    Chicago has more bearing on my mindset then I ever thought. Lived in DC for years, realise my intolerance for bullshit is from Chicago.

  56. 56
    J.W. Hamner says:

    Is someone going to check on Cole and make sure he’s not in an ice bath missing one of his kidneys?

  57. 57
    max says:


    If she looks like this ( (and there are uh, people, in Austin who look like that) I think you should carefully consider your options.

    [‘Not so much The Crying Game as the The Belting & Whining.’]

  58. 58
  59. 59
    Schlemizel says:


    Nope, does not seem to work here on BJ with my current version of FF
    I tried code to see if that works to change text & that fails too, except for the ones that are shown above the text box

  60. 60
    jeffreyw says:

    @Schlemizel: last button on the right needs to be set to html

  61. 61
    elmo says:

    When I lived in SoCal, I used to boogieboard every day, year round. I have never in my life worn a wetsuit. Just me and a bathing suit in 55 degree water. I once went swimming in a lake at 10,000 feet elevation that had a snowbank extending down into it. Water was probably 40 degrees. I was blue for hours, but I loved it.

    But over 75? I’ll be sitting over here in the air conditioning with an icepack.

  62. 62
    SiubhanDuinne says:


    my intolerance for bullshit is from Chicago.


  63. 63
    Schlemizel says:


    Oh SURE! Like you expect me to read the instructions or something!

    Edit – nope, all kinds of HTML code in above but no change on my screen. I’ll keep playing with it

  64. 64
    satby says:

    Chicago folks and alums rule. It is where you grow an intolerance for b.s. (which is a bit of a handicap in my current employment).
    I’m South Side Irish, and I can tell people the show Shameless is more documentary that it is fiction.

  65. 65
    Punchy says:

    @J.W. Hamner: As far as I know, no one from this blog has actually ever seen Cole alive. He could be a 13 yr old girl trolling all of us all this time. It would make sense, as fascinated with cats and computers “he” is…..

  66. 66
    jeffreyw says:

    @Schlemizel: I haven’t played long with it in the BJ comment editing box, but I think FYWP limits the functionality to the same buttons you see on the regular comment box – bold, ital, b-quote etc. Not sure what code is allowed. I use it mainly for the link function.

  67. 67
    Schlemizel says:


    Thats a shame, I so much wanted to see how big a mess we could make out of poor ol JCs place when we started making text orange or numbered lists.

    I used to be able to get large & small fonts and superscripts here but that stopped working some time ago

    Thanks for the tool bar though – I’ll give it a try in other places

  68. 68
    Donut says:

    I’ve been to Austin more times than I can count.

    Have had some amazing times there; and one really bad day; and one day that was fairly good in the end, but could have been really bad. I seriously needed a helmet that time, but alas, did not have one, so left town with a broken face and a paper bag full of the nastiest ditch weed I have ever smoked.

    And that’s all I’m sayin.

  69. 69
    dance around in your bones says:


    Thanks jeffreyw – I can embed links just fine in my original comments – it’s just once I return (in edit mode) to add some pithy link there are no buttons to embed the new link so it just shows up butt-naked.

  70. 70
    La Caterina (Mrs. Johannes) says:

    @jeffreyw: how’s the wayward puppy?

    What, no breakfast pr0n?

  71. 71
    Jane2 says:

    @Raven: If you were sitting outside in 27 degree weather shorts and winter boots, you’d be Canadian.

  72. 72
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    OT, but over at Bonddad Blog New Deal Democrat has crunched some numbers on turnover in SCOTUS. He concludes that it’s unlikely that Obama will appoint a justice in his second term.
    Then he goes on to tear the Conservative 5 a new one for trying to ‘repeal the 20th century’. It’s a good read.

  73. 73
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Jane2: Hahahaha!

    I live in SoCal, and it always cracks me up when the grandkids go outside in 68ish degree weather and declare “it’s freezing!”

    Of course, they are often in a state of partial undress or just plain nekkid.

  74. 74
    JPL says:

    @Jane2: In the south black socks are appropriate with shorts in the winter.

  75. 75
    Jane2 says:

    @dance around in your bones: That’s summer! It’s up to 14F here and people are saying “Sure glad it’s warming up.”

  76. 76
    Violet says:

    Wondering if John still knows this girl, now that it’s morning.

  77. 77
    jeffreyw says:

    @dance around in your bones: Yes, the toolbar adds that same function to the BJ edit box – select the text you wish to turn into a link and click the icon in the tool bar, it works just like the link button over the regular comment box. The icon is the chain link image in a greenish circle.

  78. 78
    jeffreyw says:

    @La Caterina (Mrs. Johannes): Katie is still out and about. Haven’t had breakfast yet. Any requests?

  79. 79
    Jane2 says:

    @jeffreyw: Something delicious and carb-loaded would make a lovely picture.

  80. 80
    Violet says:

    @jeffreyw: Pancakes, maybe with blueberries or something. Maple syrup. Bacon.

    That’s what I’d have if I didn’t have to put on a lunch today.

  81. 81
    PeakVT says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder: That’s why I think justices should have terms, so they get replaced on a regular basis and can’t have a say in determining the allegiance of their successors.

  82. 82
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:


    Florida 2000 is a very good argument for that.

  83. 83
  84. 84
    jeffreyw says:

    @Jane2: I’m thinking breakfast taco with brisket and eggs, maybe. Some beans…cheese…peppers?

  85. 85
    Koios says:

    @dance around in your bones

    Justice Ginsberg has said she will retire before 2016 (don’t have a link( so Obama will get one more appointment if the Repubs in the Senate don’t slow walk it to a standstill.

  86. 86
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:

    He concludes that it’s unlikely that Obama will appoint a justice in his second term.

    That’s not quite what I got as his conclusion. My reading was more that the overall balance of the SCOTUS is unlikely to change by any possible Obama second-term appointments — that we will need at least one more consecutive Dem administration to shift the balance. But IANAA (actuary) and might have interpreted him incorrectly.

  87. 87
    piratedan says:

    lets hope that she likes pets!

  88. 88
    MattF says:

    @JC: In case things get, um, out of hand… there’s this:

  89. 89
    MomSense says:

    Speaking of train wrecks–anyone else watching David Gregory’s interview with Agent Orange?

  90. 90
    Dissatisfied Customer says:

    Sounds like you found Sixth Street just fine, John.

  91. 91
    MattF says:

    Not intending to surprise anyone here, but guess what ex-POW is on MTP this morning.

  92. 92
    Baud says:


    Not that one again.

  93. 93
    Svensker says:

    Isn’t it amazing what happens every time Cole leaves home? I’m thinking he should get out more. Time that young feller were hitched and spawning pups of his own…

  94. 94
    Schlemizel says:


    OH THANK GAWD! I was wondering what happened to him, seems like he just disappeared after he lost the Presidential election. I was afraid we might have lost him

  95. 95
    PeakVT says:

    Maybe the Sunday shows will shut down when McCain dies for lack of guests. At least that’s what I hope will happen.

  96. 96
    JPL says:

    @MomSense: Did David kiss his ring?

  97. 97
    Ultraviolet Thunder says:

    Hey, go easy on McCain. After a certain age people tend to rely on routine to structure their lives. Some people of his generation meet up for brunch with their pals at Waffle House and complain about their aches and pains. McCain meets up with his friends on television and complains about the blah man who clobbered him in an election 4 years ago.

  98. 98
    MomSense says:


    No he actually asked him a few tough questions. Of course I am still cursing at my teevee because Gregory let him get away with a lot of nonsense.

    But Boehner looked quite surprised. His lips were quivering–he was flushed/turning into a pumpkin. It was interesting.

  99. 99
    GMann says:

    @<a href= Speaking of streaming, SpaceX has live coverage of the Dragon module docking with the ISS. Right now the module has been captured with the Canadarm2 and the actual docking maneuver is coming up.>PeakVT: Dragon Module and ISSS. . .actual docking maneuver. . . Is this some kind of code that John is going to get lucky ? ? ?

  100. 100
    JPL says:

    @MomSense: MTP starts in ten minutes in the Atlanta market but I’ve sworn off Sunday repub fests for lent.

  101. 101
    Maude says:

    Poor girl. She meets Cole and guess what? We are all here. In a way it’s worse than if John had children. There are a lot of us and we have no manners.

  102. 102
    Odie Hugh Manatee says:

    The only question I have for John is: How many drinks did you consume before you found this “girl” in Austin?

    @Ultraviolet Thunder:

    I think it’s more like Walnuts looked at his weekend choices and decided that being at home would mean that his plastic wife would want her ankles behind her head for a few minutes and that was just too much for him.

    Facing that, Walnuts opted to get another free rim job from Stretch on national teevee.

  103. 103
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @chris: Geneva through 6th grade.

    @Maude: I blame Cole. He didn’t have to post it.

  104. 104
    GMann says:


    Southside – Evergreen Park, Little Company of Money, The Plaza, Rosie’s Pizza. . .

    AZ now

  105. 105
    Maude says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    Well, of course we blame Cole. It comes with the territory.
    And we’d never forgive him if he didn’t tell us.

  106. 106
    Ash Can says:

    Heaven forbid that Girl finds this blog. Cole would end up with both a drink and a slap across his face and would be back to posting pictures of his pets sitting in his lap In front of the TV every evening.

    Also too, I don’t think it’s a huge coincidence that a bunch of former and current Chicagoans/suburbanites with a low tolerance for b.s. hang around this blog.

  107. 107
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Maude: Hey, if he didn’t post we wouldn’t know that there was something not to forgive. After all, I didn’t tell everybody about the girl with the “Deus ego sum” tattoo at the base of her neck, did I? Discretion counts.

  108. 108
    gnomedad says:

    Lisle resident here. Maybe we can swing a Chicago area meeting sometime.

  109. 109
    Ash Can says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Of course, if the relationship doesn’t work out and Cole wants to get rid of her, he can always tell her, “Hey, I posted about you on my blog. Wanna see what the commenters said about us?”

  110. 110
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Ash Can:

    Of course, if the relationship doesn’t work out and Cole wants to get rid of her, he can always tell her, “Hey, I posted about you on my blog. Wanna see what the commenters said about us?”

    He could also just leave town.

  111. 111
    gnomedad says:

    @J.W. Hamner:

    Is someone going to check on Cole and make sure he’s not in an ice bath missing one of his kidneys?

    We have a winner!

  112. 112
    different-church-lady says:

    You “met” her? You MET her? There’s like 15 dozen different plausible connotations here, scanning the gamut of “introduced to”, “crushing on”, “went out with” and “made a one-night two-backed beast with”.

  113. 113
    Maude says:

    @Ash Can:
    #107 I think if she read the comments, he’d get a kick you know where.
    We take care of our John, don’t we.

  114. 114
    Shortstop says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: We probably know hundreds of the same people. That is unsettling.

    Raven: it really is “in like Flynn.”

  115. 115
    Shortstop says:

    I predict Cole won’t be seen here for days. There are many possible reasons for that with varying degrees of positivity. But the story, when we get it, won’t be boring.

  116. 116
    Shortstop says:

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: I very much doubt that Cindy and John have been in the same room since 2008.

  117. 117
    Violet says:

    @jeffreyw: That’s French toast, isn’t it? Looks delicious.

  118. 118
    Steeplejack says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    This is kind of a pain, but here is one way to do a link in edit mode:

    Do the linky bit first in the regular comment box, copy it (and erase it), then open your edit box and insert it where you want it. Ta-da! And FYWP.

  119. 119
    Jasmine Bleach says:

    @gnomedad: Or maybe he found out overnight that she was only into guys who do yoga . . .

  120. 120
    danielx says:


    Except we don’t do things like leaving corn chips in the dresser drawers.


    Also, too – is there an event in Austin?

  121. 121
    Mnemosyne says:

    @dance around in your bones:


    (Just proving my bonafides for the others who grew up in Chicagoland in the 1980s. But the winters drove me away — I bugged out after high school and have been in Southern California ever since.)

  122. 122
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Steeplejack: Wow, that sounds like it might actually work!

    I loved jeffryw’s suggestion but the comments on that add-on are so old and complainy that I was hesitant to add (yet another!) add-on to my Firefox.

    I try to keep things to a dull roar in that dept.

  123. 123
  124. 124
    Ash Can says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: And hope she doesn’t follow him, to see for herself if Tunch really is that big.

  125. 125
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Mnemosyne: That is one truly weird link!

    I may have to send it to my sister to give her a laugh this AM.

    Also, back in the days when you could easily walk back across the border from Mexico (i.e. pre-9/11) all you had to do was grin at the border patrol agent when he asked you where you were born and say “Berwyn, Illinois!” Got ya waved through every time, because who would know that shit if you weren’t born there?

  126. 126
    Ash Can says:

    @Mnemosyne: LOL! That was the first thing I thought of too, but I’m on my smart phone and too fucking lazy to haul my can out to the computer on which I can do links.

  127. 127
    Ash Can says:

    @dance around in your bones: The original Svengoolie was awesome, and Son Of is excellent too. It’s too bad that you left Berwyn before their time.

  128. 128
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Ash Can:

    There’s a whole book about Chicago horror movie hosts. I bought it on a visit home one summer. Yes, I moved 1,800 miles away and still managed to marry a guy who moved here from Oak Park. What are the odds?

  129. 129
    Central Planning says:

    Pics or it didn’t happen.

  130. 130
    Mnemosyne says:

    @dance around in your bones:

    For some reason, Berwyn was a running joke on “Son of Svengoolie.”

    My other Berwyn connection is that my (now late) father-in-law was heavily involved in Cook County politics and helped one of the mayoral candidates run her campaign a few years ago. I think she lost, though.

  131. 131
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Ash Can: But I made it to Albuquerque and never looked back!

    Well, at least until I ran away to San Francisco at age 15 to truly develop my DFH skills. Then it was off to the hippie trail to India! Onwards and upwards! Far out, man! (You gotta maintain).

    @Mnemosyne: Berwyn is just such a funny name.

  132. 132
    Ash Can says:

    @Mnemosyne: Heh! Some things are just meant to be. You can take the girl out of Chicago, but etc.

    ETA: Berwyn was a running joke on Son of Svengoolie because it was a running joke on the original Svengoolie. Now, how it got started on the original, I don’t know. I always assumed it was an inside joke among the goofs working on the show.

  133. 133
    blue48pw says:

    60-something lurker here, came clean for Gene and found BJ when JC came over to the good side. So my serial project collector daughter was out on the town in Austin last night. I won’t rest easy til I hear from her.

  134. 134
    Maude says:

    #120 For us there’s an event in Austin. John met a girl. This just makes my weekend cheery.
    We are also going to tell Mrs. Cole about this so she can keep an eye on her playboy son.

  135. 135
    Shortstop says:

    @Mnemosyne: the real question is whether you could get Empire to install carpet in LA if you asked them nicely.

  136. 136
    PeorgieTirebiter says:


    So Mr. Tirebiter, how does an effete liberal snob like you end up living in Texas for the last twenty years?
    Uh, I met a girl.

  137. 137
    gogol's wife says:

    Lucky girl.

    (Now T&H will come around and tell me how pathetic I am.)

  138. 138
    Ash Can says:

    @dance around in your bones: You should write a book. Seriously. I’d love to read your memoirs, and I’m sure many, many other people would too. You’ve led a fabulous life.

  139. 139
    PeorgieTirebiter says:

    @blue48pw: @blue48pw:
    ” serial project collector…” Damn. That is too funny.

  140. 140
    Shortstop says:

    @gogol’s wife: I got your back. Cole’s immensely likable. T&H is repellent to all humanity. Pretty sure even the people who love(d) him can’t stand him.

  141. 141
    xian says:

    Cole kissed a girl and he liked it…
    It felt so wrong, it felt so right…

  142. 142
    Ash Can says:

    @Shortstop: And get Boushelle to clean it when it got dirty (“Hudson three two seven hundred”).

  143. 143
    Felonius Monk says:

    Will there be a ransom demand?

  144. 144
    JoyfulA says:

    @Alison: Yes, I was going to remind him of age-of-consent laws and the like, and then I thought, well, in Texas, the age of consent might be low enough to him to fall for a “girl.”

  145. 145
    CaseyL says:

    @Mnemosyne: So I watch the vid and think “Who are these guys?” and google them (holy hell, what did we do before Google existed?!) Sons of Svengoolie. Hell of a story. Nice to see the ghoulish lad is still on the air, long after Fox Broadcasting cancelled the original show.

    Right now in Seattle it’s cold but the sun is gloriously shining. I should go out and do something active.

    Actually, what I should do is take a trip to Austin. I’m as stubbornly single as Cole and almost as hard to live with; if he can find romance in Austin, maybe I can, too!

  146. 146
    Mnemosyne says:


    OMG YOU CAN! I almost died when I started seeing the commercials out here.

    They still use the same guy’s voice, but he’s an animated character now.

    My hometown question is, do they still use the same jingle for Weil Olds, or have they given it up now that Libertyville is full of condos (and trendy beer bistros)?

    ETA: Plus the Empire Carpets phone number is exactly the same as in Chicago, with the same chorus singing it. I think they’re trying to appeal to all of the Windy City exiles out here, ’cause there are a lot of us.

  147. 147
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Ash Can:

    I’ve been told that by many of my friends – the writing a book thing – and if I can ever stop being such a lazy bitch I just might do it.

    Part of me is afraid to spill too many (possibly probably definitely illegal beans) – but hey, if that Shantaram guy could do it, I guess I could, too!

  148. 148
    PNW_WarriorWoman says:

    If you’ve met a girl she’s too young for you. If you’ve met a woman, congratulations!

  149. 149
    Ash Can says:

    @Mnemosyne: Haven’t heard the “beautiful place in the country” jingle in a while. In fact, I looked up Weil to see if they were even still around. They are, but they’re focusing more on Caddies than Olds, which likely explains the demise of the jingle.

  150. 150
    Ash Can says:

    @dance around in your bones: Three words: Statute. Of. Limitations.

  151. 151
    rikyrah says:

    don’t get arrested

  152. 152
    Yutsano says:

    Waitaminute…what happened to Ladyfriend??

  153. 153
    Ash Can says:

    And on that note, it’s time to go watch the Detroit Redwings try their luck at being the first team this year to beat the Blackhawks in regulation time. Being a Chicago sports fan, it’s an exceedingly rare treat to be able to say about any of my guys that they aren’t just a team, they’re a scourge.

  154. 154
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Ash Can: Yeah, I used to joke that maybe when I was 80 I’d write the book.

    The sad thing is that my husband, who had pretty nearly total recall of every crazy ass thing we did together (he was the guy I ran off to San Francisco with and eventually on the hippie trail from Amsterdam to Nepal) is gone now, and he has taken a lot of memories with him.

    I miss how I would be telling some story to somebody and he’d chime in and say “no, THIS is the way it happened!” and he was always right, the fucker. I need his memory because I am sometimes fuzzy on the details.

  155. 155
    Amir Khalid says:

    I guess Ladyfriend is what John Cole always said she was, a lady who’s only a friend. Probably like you, I am disappointed that she hasn’t been commenting here in a while.

    Now, about the Girl, I think the consensus here is that we all want photographic, or better yet video, proof of existence. From Austin, definitely; and from West Virginia in the fullness of time, should matters come to further fruition. N’est-ce pas?

  156. 156
    Dan says:

    Lmk when you meet a woman.

  157. 157
    Tonal Crow says:

    I think JC’s post is code, because it seems so enigmatic, but I cannot decipher it. Meanwhile, Mitt Mitt Bull of Shit is whining about not being President, and Ann is whining about the media.

  158. 158
    Cain says:

    588-2300 has been seared into my memory. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. Especially when they would blanket WGN channel constantly with that.

    of course, they’ve expanded and now I see the ads on my local tv channel as well.

  159. 159
    Cain says:

    Good Job, John! It figures that you would meet a woman not in the same state as you, ya bum. I hope you had at least some sexy times. :-)

  160. 160
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Tonal Crow: Jeez, I wish it had killed him not to be President.

    Ok, not really, but – just go gentle into that good night, Mitt. And his wife blames the media?

    You bought the ticket, you took the ride and yes, bloody hell, it’s over! Thank Dog we won’t have Mitt to kick around anymore.

  161. 161
    Cain says:

    I think we’re going to have to ask Imani what happened, cuz you know he’s probably made a drunk call to her at least once!

  162. 162
    gnomedad says:

    @Ash Can:
    Reminds me of a line from Hill Street Blues: “I got three words for you: Statue. Tory. Rape.”

  163. 163

    Love, exciting and new.
    Come aboard, we’re expecting you.
    Love, life’s sweetest reward.
    Let it flow. It floats back to you.

  164. 164
    Phoenician in a time of Romans says:


    Are you expecting us to form a chorus of

    “Well-a well-a well-a, huh
    Tell us more, tell us more,
    Did you get very far?”

  165. 165
    gogol's wife says:


    Was that Andy? I’m hearing that in Andy’s voice. Or was Andy the culprit (Ally Sheedy plot)?

  166. 166
    Msskwesq says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: yes that seems true. I grew up in Wheaton. Most of my family are in Oak Park, La Grange, Elmhust and the north side, where I was born.

  167. 167
    kindness says:

    OMG could you imagine John Cole with a little 22 year old Molly Ivins shitkicker from Texas? Karma is a bitch John. On the other hand, who could turn down the fun?

  168. 168
    Morzer says:


    And then she bagged your groceries and wished you a nice day, amirite?

  169. 169
    Ruckus says:

    Relax legs, butt falls into chair. Sitting.

    That’s not what they meant?

  170. 170
    notorious JRT says:

    @raven: Flynn (as in Errol)

  171. 171
    Eric the infrequent says:

    @Punchy: oh shit, me too.

  172. 172
    jayjaybear says:


    588-2300 has been seared into my memory. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. Especially when they would blanket WGN channel constantly with that.

    I think you mean “carpet”, considering…

  173. 173
    LosGatosCA says:

    If you can’t meet a girl in Austin, you’re in a deep coma.

    PS don’t show her your transvaginal probe on the first date. Keep it a mystery until you know she’s the one.

  174. 174
    Rome Again says:

    How does she like being the subject of a blog post?

  175. 175
    redoubt says:

    @Ash Can: Maybe get Aronson “home of the credit connection” to sell you some furniture. (Or if you’re upscale, John M. Smyth’s Homemakers.)

    Cook County Hospital-born, CVS grad. And yeah, I left because I couldn’t take the winters anymore. . .

  176. 176
    Jacquie says:

    There is literally no legitimate reason for me to be as excited about this news as I am. Good luck, man!

Comments are closed.