Sunday Morning Open Thread

happy train

We finally got a taste of winter down here in sunny Florida; it got down into the 30s last night. My hubby dragged all of his tomato and pepper plant seedlings into the house. I hope there are no snakes lurking in the 30 or so containers.

We’re going to put a pot of red beans on to simmer and have them over rice later. What are y’all up to today?

PS: President Obama is to blame for the shitty weather. It’s not going to get back into the 70s until he leaves.

[Picture via BuzzFeed]

131 replies
  1. 1
    Linda Featheringill says:

    Hey, good morning! Wow. The BJ community must be sleeping in this morning.

    Not much on the agenda today, fortunately. I could use a nice, serene day. [Maybe I should stay away from politics?]

    BTW, when do you guys actually plant your tomato seedlings?

    ETA: And can we fix the nymnesia?

  2. 2

    A cool front blasted through South Florida last night, dropping temps into the 40’s inland and 50’s here on the coast.

    So I’m heading down to the Keys where it’s a little bit warmer.

  3. 3
    c u n d gulag says:

    I know people will find this disgusting, but it’s really, really delicious, I’ll be making some soup using salmon heads:

    Fish-head Soup, with millet, carrots, onions, potato’s, and celery.

    The fish-heads are the base of the soups stock, and are wrapped in cheese-cloth – gnawing on any meat they may have on them, after you take them out, is optional.

  4. 4
    nancydarling says:

    I’d be grumpy too, if I were forced to wear that hat.

  5. 5
    geg6 says:

    Got about two inches of snow last night. My John took me to dinner at Ruth’s Chris last night for belated Valentine’s Day. As his reward, I’m making bracciole with orechette and a side of sauteed broccoli rabe and shiitake mushrooms. It takes a lot of effort and time, but it’s delicious and perfect for a cold snowy day.

  6. 6
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Linda Featheringill: Hubby does 100% of the gardening, so I can’t say for sure. He has something going year-round.

    Last night, he dragged in about 30 young tomato plants that are in buckets (they stay in the buckets; our soil is kind of crappy for growing here on the coast) plus several trays containing 20 or so cups of seedlings each; he says they are more tomatoes, hot peppers, mild peppers and eggplants.

    There are also beans growing in larger containers outside; he covered those up rather than dragging them inside. We didn’t get a freeze, but it was cold and windy.

    RE: WordPress — wish I could help, but I have no idea how. It deletes my info too when I’m on the tablet but seems to save it on the laptop. Maybe it’s a browser thing?

  7. 7
    JPL says:

    @Linda Featheringill: Wow! If you stay away from politics, you’ll miss McCain’s appearance on MTP. Little McCain will be on Fox news.

  8. 8
    Ramalama says:

    Morning in wintry Quebec means no snakes for me! But it sure would be nice to have an early thaw.

    Sunday morning means chocolate croissants and something tasty and hot to drink but alas I seem to have found myself in Lenten mode. A lifetime in Catholic schools and I never once gave anything up for Lent. Never. It was a source of quiet defiance for me. But now as an adult I fall in, every once in a while, with this one rite. And this year, the Year of the Snake, finds me doing just that.

    Or not doing.

    Not eating anything chocolate, that is.

  9. 9
    bemused says:

    I’m laughing about Joe Troll Scarborough’s obsession with stalking Krugman.

  10. 10
    PurpleGirl says:

    @nancydarling: Yeah, Grandma went a little crazy with the crochet hook… Looking at the kid to her right, I wonder if a bunch of grandmas went crazy with the crochet hooks.

    I love the juxaposition of the grumpy kid and the sign naming The Happy Train.

  11. 11
    Linda Featheringill says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    I can appreciate going to container gardening. Takes care of several problems all at once, including you can bring them inside!

    I plan to start tomato seeds next week, using a method I found on the internet. And they can’t put anything on the internet that isn’t true. Right? [I’ll report if it works.]

    I try to stay away from McCain anyway. And by extension, anyone who sucks up to him. So on Sundays, I am usually browsing in the how-the-universe-was-made section.

  12. 12
    PurpleGirl says:

    Much luck with keeping to no chocolate.

    I knew a monsignor (the head of my university’s Catholic Center) who advocated for a Lenten routine of doing something positive, i.e., if you didn’t start the day with a prayer normally, then during Lent starting your day with a prayer, or reading a Bible passage or Missal entry every night before bed. What he wanted to do was to get people thinking about daily discipline and behavior change. (Gee, I haven’t thought about Monsignor Searson in ages. He was nice guy.)

  13. 13
    TS says:


    Yeah, Grandma went a little crazy with the crochet hook… Looking at the kid to her right, I wonder if a bunch of grandmas went crazy with the crochet hooks.

    Sisters – just the one grandma

  14. 14
    Ronzoni Rigatoni says:

    @Mustang Bobby: Try the Gulf Coast. We hit a low of 37 last night. I am thinking of moving to Puerto Rico, pero hablo espanol muy poco.

  15. 15
    JPL says:

    @Ronzoni Rigatoni: I live north of Atlanta and it was 22 when I awoke. It’s 27 now…wahoo!

  16. 16
    Amir Khalid says:

    @c u n d gulag:
    Why not try some traditional Malaysian fish-head curry recipes?

  17. 17
    Jay C says:

    I hope there are no snakes lurking in the 30 or so containers.

    I realize you’re probably talking about something less scary than a Burmese python (Florida’s newest mascot!): but really: how the hell big are these “containers”? And conversely, how big a snake is likely to lurk in a “bucket”? – not, of course, to dismiss any latent herpetophobia…..

  18. 18
    Ash Can says:

    @Betty Cracker: How did your chickens keep warm last night?

    FYWP also too.

  19. 19
    cathyx says:

    That picture reminds me of an America’s Funniest Video clip of a group of children singing ‘If You’re Happy and You Know It’ and a child right in the middle of the group just bawling his eyes out.

  20. 20
    debbie says:

    It’s cold enough that the furnace is kicking off every 15 minutes or so, which hadn’t happened this winter. I’m going to make rice pudding, which seems an appropriate accompaniment to the Downton Abbey finale tonight.

  21. 21
    jurassicpork says:

    It sure would suck getting evicted, especially at this time of year. But Mrs. JP and I have our backs against the wall.

  22. 22
    Jay C says:

    And in the Annals of FYWP, I noticed that BJ/WP is now remembering my nym and email in the comments box. For now, anyway.

  23. 23
    c u n d gulag says:

    @Amir Khalid:
    Wow, thanks – that looks GREAT!

    And I’d love it.
    My Mom… uhm… not so much.

    I have to spice-up my own plate, because she doesn’t like hot or overly spicy food.

    Neither does my sister or brother-in-law, so when they come over and I cook, I make seperate plates for my nephew and me, since we both love hot and spicy food.

  24. 24
    Schlemizel says:

    its 9 here out on the frozen tundra this morning so forgive me is I don’t shed a tear for those of you bearing up under 30s and 40s. About a month before we even start our tomato seeds.

    Went to the Gopher Womens hockey game last night and it was their first overtime game in their current 40 straight victory run. But they won in overtime.

    Afterwards there was a reception to honor the seniors – all of whom are actually graduating (unlike too many male student-athletes) and not an ego problem in the bunch. It wsa a good night

  25. 25
    emma says:

    @c u n d gulag: Fish head soup of amy kind is fantastic. After cooking my father takes them out, removes the meat and puts it back in the pot. Yum

  26. 26
    Phylllis says:

    Puttering around the house and avoiding the Sunday Morning Gasbags. Supper will be a pork loin with turnip greens and roots. The roots came from a co-worker who brought them in with the garden dirt still attached. They smelled so good. Might even whip up an olive oil pound cake.

  27. 27
    Schlemizel says:

    @Jay C:

    Coral snakes are rather small, only a few inches, but have one of the deadliest poisons of an snake in North America. We had a guy bitten by one near us in near Cocoa Beach back in the 90’s. Snakes don’t have to be huge to be scarey

  28. 28
    BGinCHI says:

    @bemused: I wish Krugman would challenge him to a Texas Cage Match of Economics on live morning TV.

  29. 29
    MomSense says:

    @c u n d gulag:

    I’m coming over for dinner! Will bring some nice wines and some good bread!

  30. 30
    PsiFighter37 says:

    Getting old sucks. Tweaked my upper left back and lower back this morning, and I have a residual sinus headache from a couple weeks ago that started when I was stuffed up. I thought 27 was supposed to still be relatively young?

  31. 31
    General Stuck says:

    END the tyranny!!


  32. 32
    MattF says:

    Cold morning here in the DC area. I’m continuing my experiments with cooking polenta in my rice cooker. First try yesterday worked well, yielding yummy and smooth cornmeal mush, but required hovering over the rice cooker for about an hour and a half– which is contrary to the rice cooker credo. Second try is a less fussy recipe, so we shall see how much difference it makes.

  33. 33
  34. 34
    Svensker says:

    Have to leave a few minutes early for Quaker meeting this morning to get the snow off the car. Our street hasn’t been plowed yet and prolly won’t be since it’s just a few inches, so I may get to see how the snow tires work.

    Making dinner for a friend of the kid who’s joining us tonight. Sausages and mushrooms with gremolata, polenta, and salad. Wish there was some broccoli rabe to go with, but I’m too lazy to walk over to the store to get.

  35. 35
    Scout211 says:

    Re: auto-fill problem

    I rarely post, but when I read the complaints about this, I check the comment box and my name and email are still there from the last time I posted.

    I use Chrome on the Mac desktop, the Mac laptop and the iPad. I have not experienced the problem on any of those devices using Chrome.

    I have no idea why the auto-fill works for me, but it does.

  36. 36
    Maude says:

    I’ve heard of Coral Snakes. Glad they aren’t around here.
    As soon as my freezer fan is fixed, I’m going to start the Instant Breakfast, ice cream and milk to try to gain a couple of pounds.

  37. 37
    General Stuck says:


    Fabulous photo, jeffrey. I miss them too.

  38. 38
    bemused says:


    Joe would get his ass kicked but still think he won.

  39. 39
    Jay C says:


    Coral snakes. Gotcha.

    Also: BJ nymnesia now cured on my tablet as well. Weird.

  40. 40
    MomSense says:

    Anyone else watching the horror show on MTP? Yes, let’s ask Carly Fiorina how to run the country. Who better especially considering her record at HP????

  41. 41
    RaflW says:

    Hoping my friends who took the self-dubbed Earth Train to DC have a powerful and effective Keystone XL protest today!

    Trying to find some news, saw some asshattery from Forbes about the protest that 1) made fun of them for picking the climatically coldest week of the year for the event and 2) making the claim that 850,000 Bbl of crude per day is a piffle. Totally ignored the stripmining, the carbon input to turn bitumen/tar sands into oil, etc.

    But of course a magazine for the investor class isn’t likely to be friendly to people trying to assert some sense of limits around environmental rape. I’m sure I can find some Forbes bullshit about the joys of mountaintop removal, too, if I had the stomach for it.

    OK, off to church shortly. Then a potluck board meeting of a gay men’s summer camp/retreat center here in MN.

  42. 42
    Gex says:

    My big challenge these days is to deal with moving out of the house and getting it ready for sale without murdering my roommate.

    The roommate is a friend of Kate’s from high school, Anne. The kind of high school friend that is there because you haven’t figured out how to shake them. Anne moved in with us on a temporary basis when she broke up with her girlfriend…6 years ago. Of course, it is difficult to build a life and move on if all you do is go to work and then come home to watch TV and play XBox while getting plastered every night.

    I’m not at all happy with her. My clearest memories from January were of her being impossible and pissing me off. One day I had asked her if she could drop some clothes off for me in the hospital. But she is the kind of person that will not fucking answer a direct question. After about 5 minutes of trying to get an answer, I told her to forget it, I’ll get someone else to do it. Her classic Anne response was, “I didn’t say I wouldn’t!” Never noticing that her response was an admission that she never fucking answered the question.

    During the last days I had one day that anyone who wanted to could visit Kate. After that, I restricted it to inner circle people. People I wanted around me. Anne came on the open visit day. Then she started getting really pissed off that she couldn’t come again when Kate was extubated. I had to have FOUR people run interference for me, and still I gleaned enough to be pissed off by what she was doing. She was yelling about me and saying shitty things about me and so on.

    So my main goal this month has been to get out of this arrangement civilly. But Anne is the kind of drunk who does “nice” things for you. Not things that you think are nice. Things she thinks you think are nice. If you actually fucking hate what she does, then you are an ingrate.

    So Anne rearranged my living room before I came home from the hospital. And she decided that she should pay for the garage repair. And she decided that she should assume dog care duties AND that she can change the rules I have for him by letting him roam through the whole house instead of keep him upstairs behind the gate like I do.

    The absolute worst though, is that she decided that she needed to tell me some things about Kate that are upsetting to me, I can’t talk to Kate about, and I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

    There was a blow up yesterday. I ended up having to talk to her about letting the dog just do whatever and that I don’t want her involving herself in my life the way she had. Which of course, she denied doing. It’s apparently normal to up and rearrange someone’s furniture for them in her world. I ended up screaming at her to leave me alone. Which she agreed to do about 10 minutes before she actually went downstairs. The last 10 minutes of my side of the conversation were, “Is that leaving me alone?” repeatedly.

    But of course she didn’t, and she pushed me again. I have been working really hard to deal with some anger issues I have. I’ve done a really good job, and haven’t really lost my temper in over a year. Until yesterday. When she pushed me some more I lost it. I told her I didn’t like her because she is a drunk who only hears me after she pushed me to the point of screaming. And I asked her what she was thinking fucking with my memory of Kate with that story. (Her answer, “I was just kidding!” Bullshit.)

    Ugh. I dreaded coming home to my house more last night than any night since Kate died. I really, really, really hate Anne. I don’t like to say I hate people. But I really hate Anne.

    She’s been dragging her feet on moving out, but I’ve stopped worrying about it. I’ve told her I’m selling the house. I’ve told her that I have an apartment lined up. I’ve told her I don’t know how long it will take for the house to get through probate and be sold. But I’m not going to waste any time and energy worrying about her. If she doesn’t want to move out in an orderly fashion of her choosing, she can be forced to move out suddenly because the house sold.

    Oh, I think I did tell her that Kate didn’t want her here either, but she couldn’t figure out how to get rid of her. Which I am not proud of. But now she can have a new painful memory of Kate too.

    House drunks. The absolute fucking worst.


  43. 43
    JCT says:

    @General Stuck: Based on some of the temps people are reporting it may prove difficult to keep a good nipple “down” anyway.

    It’s about 50 here in Tucson and we’ll hit 75 today. Youngest is home from college for the weekend nursing a broken heart over some girl – so I am cooking all of his favorite foods. Husband is getting the smoker ready for ribs.

    I am hoping to get to the range today – it has been overrun with newbie idiots of late, used to be a place where I could clear my mind, now I just worry whether the guy in the next lane knows what he is doing. Thank you Wayne.

    Thought of you yesterday Betty. Local ACE hardware has a big cage of chicks up for the folks who want to keep chickens for eggs!

  44. 44
    raven says:

    @c u n d gulag: I checked on my redfish head skeletonization project and it’s going well. The dermestid beetle population has exploded and the skull structure is slowly being revealed.

  45. 45
    Comrade Jake says:

    Shocker that MTP has an exclusive with John McCain, eh my friends?

  46. 46
    Maude says:

    I know this seems extreme, but I would put all her stuff outside and change the locks. If she made a fuss, I’d call the police and have her hauled off.
    She has no right to be there.
    You can’t have people coming to see the house with her there.

  47. 47
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Ash Can: The chickens repaired to their cozy hen house inside the coop as usual last night, but we shut their little screened window, which we normally leave open, to keep out the drafts.

    Both breeds we keep (Australorps and Reds) are hardy and pretty heat/cold tolerant. If we had been looking at a freeze, we’d have rigged up the heat lamp for them, but it didn’t get quite that cold, so they were fine huddled together on their roost in the hen house. They’re out foraging as usual right now, though sticking to the sunnier areas rather than the shade.

    Hubby’s plants would have probably been fine last night too. But he’s worked so hard on them; he was afraid to chance it with the wind.

  48. 48
    c u n d gulag says:


    Make it a nice seeded rye.

    They had gefilte fish on sale yesterday, and it’s great on the rye – with some green onion and a dollop of hot horseradish (I also love it with wasabi – but don’t tell any Jewish people that, since it’s probably against some dietary law or other).

    And a nice Reisling would go great with the soup and gefilte fish.

  49. 49
    tybee says:


    got pictures to share?

  50. 50
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Gex: What Maude said. She needs the boot.

  51. 51
    c u n d gulag says:

    @Comrade Jake:

    How did they ever convince that quiet, shy, and reclusive man to come out in public?

  52. 52
    bemused says:

    We are feeling very sad this morning. Our dil, son’s wife, took their beautiful, sweet chocolate Lab for his routine annual vet visit and after a test on his lymph nodes, he has a diagnosis of lymphoma. They had no clue anything usual was going on with him. He looks and acts completely normal. This is a total shock to all of us. He is only 7 years old and the choices are grim. Putting him through chemo at a cost of thousands of dollars to extend his life for maybe 16 months or lose him in 1 to 3 months without chemo.


    My brother went on that Earth Train too!

  53. 53
    Svensker says:


    Sounds hideous. But you will soon be on the other side of it. Ugh. Hugs.

  54. 54
    JCT says:

    @Maude: I second this, getting the house in order to show will be impossible with here around . Not to mention the fact that it takes a unique type of asshole to fuck with you at this time of your life.

  55. 55
    MomSense says:

    @c u n d gulag:

    Just happened to pick up a lovely rye at the farmers’ market–and Riesling sounds delightful. I’m on it!

  56. 56
    gelfling545 says:

    The absolute worst though, is that she decided that she needed to tell me some things about Kate that are upsetting to me, I can’t talk to Kate about, and I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

    Consider the source. Since the woman’s view of reality seems a bit skewed, it’s likely that these remarks were from her own take on things, not necessarily objective reality.

  57. 57
    c u n d gulag says:

    I’m sorry to hear about your situation, and your loss.

    Remember – it’s your house.

    Set a deadline – give her a decent period of time to get herself ready, and move out.

    Two weeks to a month is more than generous – at least in my eyes.

  58. 58
    MattF says:

    @c u n d gulag: I suppose wasabi isn’t echt-kosher, with a little ‘k’ on it, but it’s probably fine as far as the actual rules & regulations go.

  59. 59
    c u n d gulag says:

    Farmers market rye – YUM!!!

  60. 60
    BGinCHI says:

    @bemused: That’s pretty much the story of his whole career.

    How else do you get into TV punditry?

  61. 61
    Odie Hugh Manatee says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    I agree, toss her shit out in the front yard and tell her that the yard sale signs will be up the next day if it isn’t gone by then.

    The last thing you need right now is someone shitting all over you and your memories with Kate.

  62. 62
  63. 63
    raven says:

    @bemused: We spent a great deal of money when Raven got anal cancer. The treatment was brutal on him but he made it 2 years. No one can prepare you for what it is like but we say we wouldn’t do it again. . .NOW we say that as I look at my little girl curled up in her chair.

  64. 64
    MomSense says:

    @c u n d gulag:

    Link to the bakery. He sells out really early so we have to get to the farmers’ market right when it opens!

    I bought a Valija and a Couronne.

  65. 65
    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason says:

    @PsiFighter37: 20s or 30s is about when I must have started screwing up my back. My advice (now that I’ve finally done it). See a doc, make sure nothing structural is wrong, see a physical therapist, and DO THE DAMN EXERCISES he or she gives you.

    Also, if they tell you don’t twist and lift, then by all means don’t twist and lift.

    Good luck.

  66. 66
    Chris says:

    JESUS it’s cold. Had to bike back in it at 2AM last night and now praying to God I didn’t catch a cold, this week of all weeks I really can’t afford to be sick.

  67. 67
    bemused says:


    They are reeling and feeling helpless. The diagnosis was on Valentine’s Day and our dil had to wait until our son got home Friday after being out of town for work. She couldn’t tell him on the phone. When he did get home, she could barely get the words out to tell him without choking up. Our son couldn’t talk to us much when they called us with the bad news, he is so broken up. He is a triathloner and their Lab always go on long runs together. It’s even more shocking to get a diagnosis like that when the dog is so young and so fit.

  68. 68
    c u n d gulag says:


    The photo’s of that bakers bread should be labelled food-p*rn!

  69. 69
    MomSense says:

    @c u n d gulag:

    Right! Just as long as noone films us eating the bread–talk about food p*rn!

  70. 70
    cintibud says:

    Dancing Dave actually pushing against McCain’s continued Bengazhi talking points. Not that hard, actually – it’s dancing Dave, mind you, but still notable. Kevin Drum mentioned the other day that he thinks the media is finally noticing (or finding it too hard to ignore anymore) just how off the rails the GOP is and are starting, timidly of course, to maybe hint that one side maybe “does it a little more” than the other. Maybe there something to that.

  71. 71
    WaterGIrl says:

    @jeffreyw: I miss your hummingbirds, too!

  72. 72
    Gex says:

    Thanks, guys.

    Hopefully, I’ll be able to start moving in to my apartment next week. Then at least I won’t have to share a living space with her when I’m trying to get her out of here.

    I think I’m going to want to spend some time with Al Anon after living with her. It’s impressive, in a terrible way, what chronic hard core drinking does to a person.

  73. 73
    Suzanne says:

    @Gex: Good Lord.
    Kick. Her. Ass. Out.
    What a horrible person. Just tell her you’re selling the house and she needs to be out first and she has two weeks to be gone or you’re going to change the locks and sell her things.

    My house is a mess, but I am going to reward myself today with a manicure.

  74. 74
  75. 75
    c u n d gulag says:

    I’d love a couple of hunks, and I could die a happy man.

    One to slather some fresh butter on, and the other to dip in some good olive oil, with balsamic vinegar, some red pepper flakes, some ground pepper, and some shaved Parmesan cheese.

    Oh, Hell!
    Make it three slices – one to put some good cheese on.

    And then, I can go in sated peace.

  76. 76
    Suzanne says:

    @Gex: Al-Anon is wonderful. Good idea.

    @PsiFighter37: I feels you. About four weeks ago, my sinuses decided to swell shut. They periodically do this, in response to….God knows what. I need FloNase but I only have those horrible OTC nasal sprays. I really need FloNase STAT.

  77. 77
    Ramalama says:

    @bemused: Our dog was just diagnosed with terminal bone cancer – a total surprise because we’d been told that the back limping was old age / arthritis. New limp in front paw just appeared and guess what.

    We’ve had lots of vets telling us this and that through the 11 years… diagnosed with one thing when it turned out to be another thing. We’ve always checked out holistic treatments because they tended to work better than anything else… so we’re now looking into this for our boy – perhaps your DiL would be interested in this. The reviews seem legit.

  78. 78
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Suzanne: Selling a house with a tenant is not as easy as selling one without one. You want to show the house empty. If she hasn’t been paying rent or you have no lease, then it’s definitely time to go.

  79. 79
    WaterGIrl says:

    @bemused: I went through this with a dog of my own and then again about a year ago with a beloved dog that belongs to a friend.

    Did they do the test that tells you whether it’s the slow growing kind of lymphoma or the faster one? That’s really important to know. Really important.

    Second, have the vet try prednisone first. Some lymphoma responds really well to that, but not always. TRY THAT FIRST.

    Bear, who I loved as if she were my own, was responding really well to the prednisone. But she was in such great shape that the vets at the University Vet clinic and teaching hospital encouraged my friend to have Bear get chemo – “we have great success with this all the time”.

    I am sad to say that chemo was a terrible choice for our Bear. Bear was two days into the chemo and became terribly sick, throwing up day and night, and then 2 days later she was gone. It was a total shock and a terrible thing to see. We would give anything for Bear’s last 4 days not to have been that. Especially since she was responding so well to the prednisone.

    My dog, by the way, made it a couple of years with the prednisone, perfectly happy.

    Edit: Your dog might be one of the dogs who comes through it all just fine, as a very good percentage of dogs do. It’s just important to know both sides of the picture when trying to decide, and the vets had not told Carol about the flip side, what it looks like when it doesn’t go well.

    I am so not trying to scare or upset you.

  80. 80
    Jay C says:

    @c u n d gulag: @MattF:

    Dunno if it would affect its eligibility for that little “K” or not, but I read somewhere that most “wasabi” that one finds in the US isn’t real wasabi (which isn’t mass-produced, even in Japan), but rather just processed hot horseradish colored green. So zai gezunt….

  81. 81
    bemused says:


    I don’t know what they will decide to do, chemo or no, but he is a young, fit dog. He is not showing symptoms either so he would be a better candidate for chemo than an older dog with symptoms. Some estimates on chemo so far have been $3,500 to $5,000. I’m sure they will be doing a ton of research including other people’s experiences.

  82. 82
    Suzanne says:

    @Suffern ACE: Absolutely.
    Anne = hasta la pasta

  83. 83
    Ramalama says:

    @Gex: I fourth or fifth what the others have said about your situation and I just wonder if you can get someone who’s your Number 1 Gex supporter to Back You Up when you confront and deliver the news to the drunk.

    Someone absolutely Bad Ass needs to do this, and from the way it sounds you are – Kate just died – I don’t think you’re up to it on your own.

  84. 84
    bemused says:


    Great advice. I will be calling the kids now.

  85. 85
    c u n d gulag says:

    @Jay C:
    A sheynem dank!

    I’m not Jewish, but I grew-up in a Jewish neighborhood -and almost all of my friends when I was in grade school were Jewish, so I know a lot of the dietary laws, and some of the lingo.

  86. 86
    Jay C says:


    Good-looking bread! Funny, I just got back from a morning errand to get fresh bread for breakfast: fortunately, this century-old New York City landmark is just around the corner…

  87. 87
    MomSense says:

    @c u n d gulag:

    We always buy really good cheese at the farmers’ market and the other yummy thing is to roast some garlic and then add it to olive oil, salt, pepper, and red pepper flakes–some fresh herbs. Oh my!

    If you ever want to take a super foodie trip–Portland through Mid Coast Maine is definitely the place to go. Lots of small farms and many restaurants who only serve locally harvested items. We also have the best seafood anywhere!

  88. 88
    MomSense says:

    @Jay C:

    That looks awesome!

  89. 89
    Ash Can says:

    @Gex: I co-sign on the folks saying that you need to give Anne a deadline for being out of there completely, and sticking to it. I also co-sign on Ramalama’s idea of recruiting an enforcer friend to help. Both you and Kate have already been way more than generous to Anne. It’s time to draw the line.

  90. 90
    Steeplejack (tablet) says:

    Just seeing if I can get my nym to stick.

  91. 91
    c u n d gulag says:

    @Jay C:
    I’ve been there!

    We used to get our bread there sometimes, then go down to the East Village and get our kielbasa, and go to Russ & Daughters for some morinated herring and smoked fish – DELISH!!!

  92. 92
    ruemara says:

    I was feeling pretty good because I found $1.25 so I can do a load of laundry and if I hang it out, I can have clean clothes in 2 days. Now I am annoyed for Gex and sad for bemused’s DiL.

    I think the day will be about finishing yet another job app, having some clean clothes for next week and keep working on various projects. I’m also worried I’ll have my own unwelcome guest. My ex is going to losing the room he has been staying in for the past 5 months. I’ve already told him that his unemp ass is not staying with me because he is not just not working, he is failing to look for work with some real fervor. But I haven’t abandoned him because if I cut off the cell, he’d be cut off from any way to contact people and I help him out by cooking so his food budget can extend. I’ve been begging him to move back to NYC so he can start over with family, but so far, every date has been pushed back. I’m not doing well, the stress is making or has made my hypertension… dangerous. And I’ve started to notice that when he drops by to do any work (I allowed him to set up his work computer at my place since he said he needed to practice before he could get a job back in his field) I find some of his stuff stored somewhere else in my place. It seems I’m going to have to be mean to the man. And I’m not looking forward to it, but otherwise, he’ll settle himself right into my place, literally do nothing to help, just eat, watch tai chi videos and cartoons and play with the cats. I got no idea what the hell happened to the person I started off with nearly 20 years ago, but the guy who knew he had responsibilities seems to be gone.

  93. 93
    bemused says:


    Their vet is referring them to a pet oncologist. They don’t know yet if it is the more or less aggressive lymphoma but will soon.

    btw, they live in Raleigh, NC if anyone has info to share on dog lymphoma experiences and best treatment vets there.

  94. 94
    c u n d gulag says:

    Oh, I know!
    But I haven’t been up there in years and years.
    I’d love to go back up there!!!

    Maybe if anyone ever hires this soon-to-be 55 year-old, I can afford to take a trip somewhere.

  95. 95
    Gretchen says:

    Anybody know a good vegetarian bean recipe without tomatoes? I have one daughter coming for dinner who is a pregnant vegetarian, and I want to get some protein into her. The other daughter has celiac disease, so can’t eat anything with gluten, and thinks tomatoes are adding to her problems. So no wheat, meat, or tomatoes, which eliminates practically all the dishes I can think of. If only they could all have the same restrictive dietary issues, instead of conflicitng ones.

  96. 96
    wenchacha says:

    Who the fuck is pediatrician Dr. Ben Carson, and why does the WSJ want him to run for President, aside from loving his platitudes and flat-tax/tithing nonsense?

  97. 97
    c u n d gulag says:

    How about a nice lentil soup and/or salad?

    Or, a 3-bean salad?

  98. 98
    MattF says:

    @Gretchen: Nothing specific, but lentils are good nutritionally, are easy to cook, and like to be spiced up.

    ETA: Looks like Mr. Gulag and I are on the same wavelength.

  99. 99
    c u n d gulag says:

    As an appetizer, you can get a can of chickpeas, drain them, throw ’em in your blender, add some garlic, tahini (or throw some sesame seeds in, if you don’t have any – which is what I do), some lemon juice, olive oil, and salt and pepper to taste (red pepper flakes to kick it up a notch), buzz until smooth, and you’ll have some terrific hummus.

    Use sliced veggies, or your favorite chips.
    If you have any olives, you can either blend them, or rough-chop and put them into the already-made hummus.

    Nobody don’t love them some hummus.

  100. 100
    WaterGIrl says:

    @bemused: That’s good. Keep in mind that it was the oncologists at the vet school here who did the hard sell on the chemo for the lymphoma without sharing the flip side of what could happen in the not-happy cases.

    We knew chemo wouldn’t be fun, but we didn’t understand that a side effect of the chemo is that she could go from zero -60 in about 45 seconds. (she’s fine one day & then death is imminent in just 2 days). It was so fast we could hardly wrap our heads around it.

    Will hope it’s the slow growing responds to prednisone kind. :-)

    My niece lives in Winston-Salem and her golden retriever has tons of health problems and surgeries, all stemming from allergies. So I’m sure they know the best vets to go to. Is Winston-Salem NC close enough to Raleigh that you want me to find out of they have vet suggestions?

  101. 101
    Origuy says:

    Nobody remembers Dr Demento and Fish Heads by Barnes and Barnes?

  102. 102
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Origuy: I bought my fish head a sweater.

  103. 103
    Mnemosyne says:


    Since she sounds like the kind of person who would be more than happy to cause problems for you, you really should put it in writing. Draft a letter (or, even better, have a lawyer friend draft it for you) formally informing her that you are selling the house and she has 30 days from the date on the letter to move out. I’m not sure what your state’s tenant rights laws are, but you will save yourself a LOT of grief if you put it in writing and hand it to her. Plus if she does subsequently refuse to leave, you’ll have something to show the police when you call them to have her thrown out.

  104. 104
    Yutsano says:

    @c u n d gulag: I can’t think of any veggies that aren’t kosher. Usually veggies get that way because of how they’re prepared rather than the veggie itself. I think there’s a Talmudic statement on that point somewhere.

  105. 105
    Maude says:

    The woman isn’t a legal tenant. She can be removed right away.
    Her name isn’t on the deed to the house and that is what counts.
    You don’t give someone 30 days to vacate when that someone is a drunk. That woman could do a lot of damage to the house.
    The police can help if it comes to that.
    There are red flags with this situation.
    I’d change those locks ASAP and toss her stuff out. That way she can’t go to court to gain entry to get her stuff.
    Safety first.

  106. 106
    Yutsano says:

    @Maude: Landlord\tenant law usually isn’t that cut and dry though. Oftentimes even without a formal lease if there has been an established tenancy relationship it can still be recognised as a month-to-month tenancy. This all depends on Minnesota law, but Anne still may have rights that she can use to fight the eviction. Yeah it gets sticky and messy.

  107. 107
    Steeplejack says:


    I think you said previously that he has depression (and won’t admit it?). It sounds pretty severe, and it definitely can be devastating.

  108. 108
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Yutsano: This.

    @Gex: I don’t do landlord-tenant work and I am not licensed in MN so I hesitate to make any legal pronouncements. I would talk to a lawyer about the best way to handle this. Given everything else you have on your plate right now, I doubt that you want to get into a legal wrangle with this person. If you pin down her exact status – guest, tenant, household pest – you can make sure that you can get her out without opening yourself up to any trouble. Free legal advice on the internet is, of course, worth exactly what you pay for it.

  109. 109
    Ramalama says:

    @Gretchen: Killer lentil recipe:

    Lentils – if dried in a bag, soak them in water for an hour or more if you’ve got the time (not necessary but helps with the toot factor) otherwise…

    put lentils in a pot of water with water slightly covering the whole batch and bring to boil, then reduce heat to simmer.

    while boiling/simmering, sautee an onion thinly sliced in olive oil in a frying pan or sautee pan. Add to the sautee some parsley and thyme ( I always err on the side of too much for proper company), and chopped / minced garlic (3 or more cloves perhaps) and sautee until the onion is translucent.

    Then toss the onion and oil and herbs in with the simmering lentils.

    add in two bay leaves to the water with the lentils

    add in 5-6 whole cloves (clous de girofle) – or maybe 1 teaspoon clove powder to the lentils

    add in some veggie bullion that’s gluten free (have to read those labels)

    handfuls of salt until it tastes…salty enough

    black pepper

    small dash of red pepper

    juice of one lemon

    and finally … the big honking secret….1/2 teaspoon of muscade.

    toss all that in while the lentils simmer, but also feel free to chop up a whole bunch of stuff like kale, spinach, carrots, swiss chard, watercress, whathaveyou, in to the soup. As long as this stuff doesn’t overpower the lentils you really can’t go wrong.

    Toss the whatever in, let it reduce and become one with the soup.

    Cook until lentils taste good and feel good in the mouth, maybe 40 minutes.

    At the very end add in a dash of apple cider vinegar. Stir. Serve.

  110. 110
    artem1s says:

    @Linda Featheringill:

    post the web URL for planting you are using.

    I started my seeds yesterday so will have to rely on the method I used last year which was pretty successful in getting actual plants that propagate. but I always have extra seeds to start a second batch if the first fail for some reason.

    got about a dozen heirloom varieties going. some new, some I have used before. really looking forward to trying Black Seaman and Royal Hillbilly. what varieties are you planting?

  111. 111
    Maude says:

    Gex isn’t a landlord. The name has to be on the deed to have a legal right to remain there.

  112. 112
    Maude says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    Lock her out and put her stuff out front is the right thing to do.
    The drunk can go to court and the house is for sale.
    This isn’t a safe situation for Gex. If the house is damaged by Anne, Gex gets to pay for it.
    I see real trouble for Gex unless she gets Anne out of there.
    If you haven’t had a situation like this in your life, it may seem imprudent to toss out a trouble maker.

  113. 113
    Omnes Omnibus says:


    The name has to be on the deed to have a legal right to remain there.

    This is not necessarily the case.


    Lock her out and put her stuff out front is the right thing to do.

    It may very well be, but that doesn’t negate anything I said. I am not interested in getting into a pissing match about this. I think people benefit from knowing their legal position in a situation like this. It doesn’t mean that one shouldn’t act quickly to protect oneself or one’s property from harm, but it does help to have some idea of where one stands in the eyes of the law.

  114. 114
    imonlylurking says:

    Gex, is she paying rent? I just did a quick google and Minnesota law would consider somebody paying rent without a lease as having an implied lease, which means also having some tenant rights. (Which means you can’t just toss her stuff out and change the locks.) If she *isn’t* paying anything then she moves to the realm of unwanted guest-I’m still poking around online but if you have any lawyer friends or friends with lawyer friends it’s not a bad idea to get some advice.

  115. 115
    imonlylurking says:

    Here’s some more. Remember, free advice on the internet is worth exactly what you pay for it:

    The first step is to establish whether the house guest is a lodger, a bonafide house guest, or a roommate. Legal definitions may vary slightly from state to state, so check with our local housing department for details.

    In general, if you own and live in the dwelling unit or home, and the individual rents a room in the dwelling, he or she is considered a lodger.

    If you have a house guest and would like them to leave, you must establish whether the guest is a roommate or truly a guest. Unfortunately, the guest can delay any legal action by fabricating a story about an oral rental agreement between you, the renter, and the guest.

    If the house guest has been living in the unit for more than 30 days, the courts might consider him or her a tenant. In this case, you may only terminate tenancy by formal written notice, regardless of whether the individual’s name is on the lease. If the house guest (who is now considered a tenant) does not vacate within the notice period, you will have to begin formal eviction proceedings.

    You really need legal advice. Maude is right to see the red flags-I see them too-but legally you may not have many options.

  116. 116
    Ramalama says:

    Glad that cooler heads (than mine) have given you advice, Gex. even if it’s free from the internets.

  117. 117
    300baud says:


    Gex, my guess is you have all sorts of people offering to help, but who don’t really know what they could do. Maybe you could pick 2-4 of them with starch and ask them to take care of getting her out? And on the other anybody-could-do-it stuff with prepping the house for sale?

    At this point your relationship with The Thing That Wouldn’t Leave is so fraught that she’ll probably respond better to somebody else. And there’s no way you need somebody that crazy pushing your buttons right now.

  118. 118
    tybee says:

    @raven: what is the intended end use of said ocellatus skull?

  119. 119
    SRW1 says:

    I might be wildly off the mark, but I have a feeling that poor little girl ain’t gonna take up crochet as a hobby.

  120. 120
    Gretchen says:

    Thanks everyone for the dinner suggestions.

  121. 121
    raven says:

    @tybee: I dunno, we’ll see how it looks when it’s done. I thought it was a better way to say thanks the big fella than throwing it in the trash.

  122. 122
    tybee says:

    @raven: here on the coast, the DNR has a carcass donation program. you give them the fish carcass after filleting and after three or so donations, they send you a hat or a t-shirt.
    they only do that for a few species but reds are one of them.
    stuff they don’t want from us gets turned into crab bait or compost.

  123. 123
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @jurassicpork: Ah, thanks for the reminder, blogwhore.


  124. 124
    Scamp Dog says:

    @nancydarling: I probably wouldn’t manage it if she were my little relative and I were seeing her in real life, but that image does put a grin on my face. “Happy train my @$$, why are you making me sit here!”

  125. 125
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @MomSense: Anyone else watching the horror show on MTP? Yes, let’s ask Carly Fiorina how to run the country. Who better especially considering her record at HP????


  126. 126
    Another Halocene Human says:


    I’m not at all happy with her. My clearest memories from January were of her being impossible and pissing me off. One day I had asked her if she could drop some clothes off for me in the hospital. But she is the kind of person that will not fucking answer a direct question. After about 5 minutes of trying to get an answer, I told her to forget it, I’ll get someone else to do it. Her classic Anne response was, “I didn’t say I wouldn’t!” Never noticing that her response was an admission that she never fucking answered the question.

    I fucking hate people like that. So sorry you have to deal with this now. At least she has a job so she can drag her sorry ass to some other living situation where some other landlord can contemplate murder.

    Had a coworker just go through that mess. She’s maybe a little poorer but sooooo happy right now. Definitely worth it. Some roommates are so smooth and some are total nightmares. C’est la vie.

    (I’ve been very lucky in cohousing situations–until I got married, lol–but I was very picky. I didn’t walk, I ran from some prospectives and kept looking.)

  127. 127
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @c u n d gulag: Wait, are you me?

  128. 128
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @ruemara: Stay strong. Don’t let him suck more years of his life.

    You sound like a very kind and empathetic person. I guess I am the opposite, as I am mean. I have seen what happens when users get cut off. Guess what, they don’t die or commit suicide. They suddenly find the strength to take care of their own shit.

    He will play you until you are completely fed up. You see the warning signs. You are on the edge yourself. Enforce that boundary. You’ll both be happier.

  129. 129
    c u n d gulag says:

    @Another Halocene Human:
    I don’t know.

    Bur if you’re a soon-to-be 55 year-old 1st generation American of Russian/Ukrainian decent, a Liberal who’s handicapped, bald, overweight, and unemployed, then maybe… ;-)

  130. 130
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @Gretchen: How does the one with digestive issues feel about spices? Cumin and masa form the thick base of chili, plus of course ground chilis if that is acceptable.

    If tomatoes are giving her trouble, stay away from onions (common in vegetarian recipes because they impart a savory flavor). Maybe use mushrooms for the umami thing instead. Onions are full of oligosaccharides* which spell digestive hell for your typical recently diagnosed person with Celiac sprue.

    Well-cooked kale also tends to be pretty safe and is quite nice with white (cannelini) beans with a savory broth. There’s this stuff called “Better Than Bouillon: Not Chicken” which is good for vegetarian soup base.

    *translation: tough to digest starch complex which may feed overgrowth of gas-producing bacteria

  131. 131
    Ramalama says:

    @PurpleGirl: This thread is probably dead and so you won’t see this but it wasn’t until after I met some people from Pakistan who talked about Ramadan the same way your Monsignor spoke about Lent that I began to develop an appreciation. Keeping attentive to what was going into the mouth as well as coming out. Maybe I had a big chip on my shoulder as a kid because there were so many kind monks, priests and nuns surrounding me.

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