Cock-a-Doodle DON’T (Open Thread)

My chickens used to be so quiet. Not anymore. I recounted a recent incident here where they started raising hell before the sun came up. That was, thankfully, an isolated occurrence. But they’ve generally become noisier lately, and it worries me because I don’t want the neighbors to get pissed off about it.

I live in a small town, and it’s legal to keep chickens. Plenty of folks even have roosters — I hear them crowing their heads off in the distance. We also hear cattle lowing if the wind is right since this is a rural-ish area. My point is that barnyard sounds aren’t out of place here. Also, this being Florida, there are plenty of noisy WILD birds around, including Quaker parrots and Sandhill cranes, which are loud enough to knock the paint off a barn.

We talked to the neighbors before getting chickens, and no one had a problem with it. I share the eggs with the neighbors, and no one has complained. But still, I worry that all the cackling and clucking we’ve had lately may get on their nerves if the hens don’t settle down.

I’m not sure why they’ve been so noisy over the last couple of weeks. It’s normal for them to squawk when laying (if I had to pass a watermelon-sized egg every time I ovulated, I’d goddamn well squawk too!), but this goes beyond the usual bok-bok-bok-buh-kok. They carry on from around nine to noon (which is their typical laying time), and then they shut up.

I can see the coop from where I work, so lately I’ve observed them closely to make sure they aren’t being menaced by a cat or something, and I let the dogs out to investigate frequently. But I don’t think it’s something like that, and I can’t figure out anything else that’s changed. It’s a bit cooler, but surely 75 degrees is nothing to complain about. Any ideas or suggestions? (I mean aside from making chicken pot pies!)

Open thread, so feel free to discuss non-poultry topics.

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205 replies
  1. 1
    comrade scott's agenda of rage says:

    This is why I love Teh Internetzez:

    http://theweek.com/article/ind.....his-datsun

    Read the comments, they make the piece.

    And then go to the guy’s home page where the daughter figures more prominently:
    http://www.ridleysrides.com/lexa.html

    Note how she doesn’t smile–the few times she cracks open her mouth it appears she comes from The Land Of Much Needed Dental Work. Clearly what available funding the family had went for tattoos instead.

  2. 2
    Another Halocene Human says:

    They’re crowing about the election.

    A friend told me to wave at people with my thumb tucked in. You’re waving “four more years” and they don’t even know it.

    Gotta survive somehow in Northern Florida.

  3. 3
  4. 4
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Another Halocene Human: A couple of days after the election, my kiddo and I were driving down the highway out in the middle of nowhere, and this car pulled up next to us, honking the horn and waving like that and shouting something that we eventually made out to be “Four More Years!” Scared the bejesus out of me at first — I figured I was trailing flames or something. But they were just exuberant fellow Obots who noticed my bumper stickers and had to share. It made me happy!

  5. 5
    Tim F. says:

    Burmese pythons. Next week you will find a snake stuck halfway under the porch with seven or eight chicken-sized lumps in it.

  6. 6
    Jay C says:

    I’m not sure why they’ve been so noisy over the last couple of weeks

    Sexual abuse from Republican officeholders and/or rightwing pundits?

  7. 7
    the Conster says:

    @Another Halocene Human:

    My Obot sister in Ponte Vedra has some…. interesting…. stories about post-election encounters. Did you know Obama killed 5 people?

    @Betty Cracker– were they a nicely dressed older white couple?

  8. 8
    quannlace says:

    Maybe they heard about Thanksgiving but learned that it usually involves turkeys.

  9. 9
    schrodinger's cat says:

    Are you sure there are no alligators in your back yard. The chickens are warning you, may be.

  10. 10
    MattF says:

    @the Conster: Probably believes similar things about Clinton, too.

  11. 11
    Kane says:

    Have you ever considered telling the chickens to shut the cluck up?

  12. 12
    anibundel says:

    Our HOA has no rules against chickens.
    The minute we try to have some, there will be a rule against them within 30 days.

  13. 13
    Everett says:

    We share chickens with our next door neighbors. For a long time, the coop was behind their house on the concrete slab of their back patio. The coop has an integrated run that’s roughly four feet (w) by seven feet (l) by six feet (h). The chickens were initially happy, but starting being really loud unless they were freed from the coop and allowed to roam the yard. Their pecking and digging just totally ruined the yard, though.

    When the neighbors decided to build a new garage to replace their tiny old one, we moved the chickens into our backyard. Now, the coop is in the far back corner under an aspen and a catalpa. We put up a 4′ fence that extends their accessible area to a circle roughly 12′ in diameter in addition to the coop and the run. Now, the chickens are never loud. They appear fairly content to come and go in that limited, but not confined space.

    So, FWIW, maybe your chickens need a little more room. You might be able to see the new set up on this FB picture that I think I have made public. Maybe you can do something similar in your yard?

  14. 14
    Betty Cracker says:

    @the Conster: No — a bunch of young dudes in a car with out of state plates. I suspect they may have been campaign volunteers on their way home from South FL, but that’s just a guess.

  15. 15
    the Conster says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    Yeah, I think my sister has learned how to make Obot gang signs with fellow Obots, because they’re few and far between in their country club world. Honking and waving isn’t her style.

  16. 16
  17. 17
    JWL says:

    Chickens have brains the size of a peanut, so it’s likely they’re still upset about Romney’s defeat. Give ’em time, and they’ll get over it. And if they don’t, then invite the neighborhood over for a barbeque.

  18. 18
    Nancy says:

    I saw a photo you posted of your chickens in their lovely coop a few weeks ago . I am living in Spain and a friend gave me some hens and roosters because he saw I had a coop. Folks here are pretty unsentimental about animals and most of my questions about providing a nice place for them have been met with laughter. So just wondering if you spread anything( straw, wood chips) on the ground. I read that diotemacious earth was good for combating fleas and mites but haven’t been able to find any here. Any suggestions you have would be mighty appreciated, I want happy chickens!

  19. 19

    Ah an open thread! I have a post up about intellectual property stuff. And actually, since I’m not a tech person at all, I’d love for some people to tell me what app or device that hasn’t been invented yet they wish they had. If you can think of anything.

  20. 20
    Dork says:

    the usual bok-bok-bok-buh-kok

    I’ve never seen that attempted in print before. golf clap. Can I use it in Scrabble?

  21. 21
    JoyfulA says:

    I’m thinking about getting my husband a quit-smoking electronic cigarette for Christmas. He keeps quitting for a week and then resumes.

    What I “know” so far is that the cheapest ones have the most expensive nicotine replacement modules. Any advice?

  22. 22
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Everett: Thanks, Everett! Good looking chickens you have there. Are they Australorps? I have three of those (and four reds).

    We currently have a hen house and a fully enclosed run set up that gives them lots of room, but it’s possible they are clamoring for more space. We allow them to roam the entire yard for about an hour before sundown under our supervision. Maybe they’re squawking in hopes that I’ll let them out sooner?

    I’d like to let them free range more, but we have a lot of hawks around here, plus, it wouldn’t be fair to the dogs, who have to be inside when the chickens are out.

  23. 23
    Jax6655 says:

    @comrade scott’s agenda of rage:

    As a daughter, this is so very disturbing. Can’t imagine my father seeing me like this, let alone building a website [shrine?] full of these pictures of his own flesh and blood.

    Don’t like to judge but, WTF??

  24. 24
    Cassidy says:

    In the Jordan Davis muder case, one of the boys who was with him was interviewed and stated that Dunn did not “politely ask them to turn it down”, but instead shouted to “turn that fucking music down”. Following that, Davis’s friend did turn it down and Davis reached over and turned it back up.

  25. 25
    Betty Cracker says:

    @JoyfulA: I have a friend who quit using an e-cig (though he hasn’t been able to quit the e-cig). I quit after smoking for 20+ years and have stayed quit for almost six months now. Hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life, bar none. You have to REALLY want to quit, or it ain’t gonna work. Good luck to your hubby!

  26. 26
    comrade scott's agenda of rage says:

    @Jax6655:

    From one of the comments in the article:

    “The mistakes this father made started well before he listed his car online.”

  27. 27
    Face says:

    @Cassidy: If this fucker wins on the SYG (aka “Shoot Your Guns”) defense, then the state of Florida is officially going Wild Westing. If you can successfully drop 9 hollow-points in a SUV full of people for the crime of decibles and get off, then there’s nothing that can be prosecuted.

  28. 28
    trollhattan says:

    @comrade scott’s agenda of rage:
    Ugh. Presuming she lives that long, that poor misguided girl (am guessing she’s not a very “mature” twenty) is not going to look very good at forty.

    Dad must be a real peach. And where’s mom?

  29. 29
  30. 30
    Punchy says:

    @Face: So the crime is DWB (Driving While Blaupunkt)?

  31. 31
    trollhattan says:

    @ Betty Crocker

    If your thread title is an Ivor Cutler reference, you win the thread title sweepstakes for the rest of the year.

  32. 32
    catclub says:

    @Betty Cracker: I like the way my sunday school (!?) teacher quit. ‘When I went to the hospital with a heart attack, I did not bring them.’

  33. 33
    The Red Pen says:

    Please oh please oh please
    Gingrich: House Republicans should stop negotiating with President Obama
    (Free Republic link to a Failing Caller story)

  34. 34
    JoyfulA says:

    @Betty Cracker: I could never quit my nicotine gum!

  35. 35
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Face: True. I find it encouraging that, unlike in the Martin case, they arrested the son of a bitch right off the bat. This was a murder, pure and simple.

  36. 36
    Higgs Boson's Mate says:

    @Southern Beale:

    I’d love for some people to tell me what app or device that hasn’t been invented yet they wish they had. If you can think of anything.

    The Orb

  37. 37
    trollhattan says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    it’s possible they are clamoring for more space.

    Moochers! Don’t fall for it–next thing you know they’ll be clucking fordemanding designer bugs and Evian water–their version of T-bones. Be firm with your foul.

  38. 38
    mdblanche says:

    @The Red Pen: The provision to give Gingrich an upgrade to first class on his next flight must have fallen through.

  39. 39
    trollhattan says:

    @anibundel:
    Is there another force in the universe as powerful as the desire of homeowner board members to control/mess with their neighbors?

  40. 40
    chopper says:

    given all the republican chicken-fucking going on since the election, i think the birds are just a little nervous is all.

  41. 41
    PurpleGirl says:

    @jeffreyw: Yummy. (I swear I must gain a few pounds whenever I look at your food pron.) But, please, keep posting the pictures.

  42. 42
    dr. bloor says:

    @comrade scott’s agenda of rage:

    Dad’s not very good at living up to his job description.

  43. 43
    The Red Pen says:

    @comrade scott’s agenda of rage: From the article:

    Sometimes acknowledging a daughter’s fledging sexuality can be a positive thing

    I don’t think “fledgling” is the right word. I’m thinking, “well-traveled.”

  44. 44
    Cassidy says:

    @Betty Cracker: I’m’ using the e-cig right now. I quit for a month about 3 months ago using the e-cig and was satisfied with it. Then I went “oh, I’m good now”. When something really stressful came up and I didn’t have anything to turn to and really neeeeeeeeeeeeeddddddeeeeddd a cigarette, I bought a pack. So this time I know: keep the e-cig charged and ready to go, even when I feel I don’t need the nicotine.

  45. 45
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    interesting…. stories about post-election encounters. Did you know Obama killed 5 people?
    @MattF: @the Conster: Probably believes similar things about Clinton, too.

    I’d bet they believed it fifteen years ago like they believe Jeebus spoke English, but they have no memory of believing it now. In three years, I predict they’ll believe it again.

  46. 46
    Redshift says:

    @trollhattan: There’s a reason why one of our top considerations when buying a house was that the neighborhood not have a HOA with any power.

    Another friend of mine decided that since he lived in a neighborhood that did, the best way to deal with it was to get onto the board. If you’re on the HOA board, you can pretty much ignore the rules (unless it has major factional fighting, as another friend had to deal with.)

  47. 47
    jeffreyw says:

    @PurpleGirl: Mrs J is making pie crust dough as I type. A bargain post-Tday turkey is in the oven roasting. There will be moar pie, this I promise!

  48. 48
    The Red Pen says:

    @J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford:

    Chicken Pot Chicken Pot Chicken Pot Pie

    For those of us who can’t view YouTube at work… was this David Cross on Just Shoot Me? Classic.

  49. 49
    PurpleGirl says:

    @trollhattan: When a friend was first house-hunting around Boca Raton, he saw a house he really liked (and his wife did too). He was about to make an offer when the owner told him about the HOA rules against pets. He had to tell her that he was thinking about making an offer but he had 2 parrots, 4 dogs, 3 ferrets, a cat and some gerbils and that if he couldn’t have pets, he couldn’t buy the house. (They had a 9-roon house in Peekskill.) The homeowner began to cry and said she’d lost several possible sales over the pet rules. And that she had voted for the pet ban. He later told me that it was her karma for voting against allowing pets.

  50. 50
    Alex S. says:

    The mayans were right. The chickens know.

  51. 51
    Rusty says:

    Concerned about infringing upon neighbors’ noise free property rights? That sounds downright libertarianish to me. j/k

  52. 52
    Redshift says:

    @The Red Pen: The comments there are precious.

  53. 53
    Cassidy says:

    @Rusty: This is Florida. Excessive noice can get you shot.

  54. 54
    Mike in NC says:

    Several years back when we lived in Alexandria, VA (close to the DC Beltway) one time I started to hear roosters crowing at all hours. I soon discovered some Koreans a street over decided to build a chicken coop in their backyard. Naturally it violated county regulations and it was shut down pretty quickly.

  55. 55
    schrodinger's cat says:

    test

  56. 56
    Interrobang says:

    I think my paternal grandfather quit smoking in the most unusual way ever. These days, it’d never happen, because we have such a thing as “medical ethics,” but this was in the late 1940s, and it was a different time. My granddad went to the doctor to have a mole taken off his neck. Doctor didn’t believe in local anesthesia, used hypnotism where possible instead. Doctor was also death on smoking (I personally believe this is because he’d fled the Nazis and had seen their research on the harms of smoking before he left). While Granddad was out, Doctor gave Granddad a post-hypnotic suggestion that any time from then on if he tried to smoke, he’d get sick to his stomach. Granddad never smoked again, and still to this day I wonder how he managed to live for another 30 or so years with a woman (my grandma) who smoked like a chimney all her waking hours…

  57. 57
    trollhattan says:

    @Cassidy:
    I believe they have a Peck Your Ground law, also, too.

    Speaking of assholes and their beloved guns, we just had this occur.

    A Galt man suspected of killing a Sacramento County animal control officer is in custody this morning after an all-night standoff with law enforcement. The animal control officer went to a Galt home Wednesday afternoon to tend to cats and dogs left behind by an evicted resident. The home was supposed to be empty. But when the officer and a bank official approached, a shotgun blast exploded through the front door, killing the animal control officer and prompting a lengthy standoff with police from across the county.
    __
    The Sacramento County Coroner’s office identified the slain officer as Roy Curtis Marcum, 45, of Elk Grove. Authorities named the suspected shooter as 65-year-old Joseph Francis Corey, who has lived at the First Street home where the shooting occurred. He remained inside the home through the night, refusing to surrender.

    http://blogs.sacbee.com/crime/.....rylink=cpy

  58. 58
    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford says:

    @The Red Pen:

    Yes it was. “Donnie” was awesome.

  59. 59
    mdblanche says:

    Potomac Patty responds to Stuart Stevens. Get this:

    Stevens fails in precisely the way in which the campaign failed: a refusal to acknowledge real and material incompetence by himself and others on the campaign. The piece stubbornly refuses to express regrets or apologies for a campaign that, as evidence has come forth, makes “The Perils of Pauline” look like the Rockettes.

    Hilarious. I haven’t laughed at something so hard in ages. Rubin has so little self-awareness she probably doesn’t even know she’s a comedian.

  60. 60
    Betty Cracker says:

    @trollhattan: The only force I’ve seen that would compete with it is the PTAs’ ability to hatch power-mad mombies. I flat-out refuse to live anywhere with a powerful HOA. I’d much rather put up with chartreuse paint jobs, washing machine planters in the yard, etc. Hell, I’d rather live next door to a pig farm.

  61. 61
    Dana says:

    Giving those tasty free eggs to your neighbors buys a lot of tolerance. Good strategy.

  62. 62
    trollhattan says:

    @PurpleGirl:
    No pets whatsoever? I could maybe see it in a Nob Hill co-op, but an actual detached, single-family subdivision? Insanity.

  63. 63
    JGabriel says:

    __
    __
    Crazy Freeper via The Red Pen:

    Start passing bills in the House and force the Senate and President to publicly oppose them. Imagine Obama having to veto a bill which keeps middle class taxes at the current level when the alternative is that they are raised automatically, just to get his tax increases on the rich.

    [JGabriel gapes in gobsmacked amazement.]

    Wow. Freepers actually think holding middle class tax cuts hostage to tax cuts for the wealthy is a winning strategy. It’s a wonder this guys eyeballs don’t fall backwards through his skull with so little brain to hold them in place.

    .

  64. 64
    Forum Transmitted Disease says:

    They’re probably scared out of their wits, what with all the chicken-fucking going on these days.

  65. 65
    PurpleGirl says:

    @trollhattan: Yes, it was a no-pets-at-all ban. Single family, detached house subdivision outside Boca. He asked about keeping pets inside the house and she told him, no, not even inside (pets can get out, you know). N loves animals, and animals love him. He needs animals around him.

  66. 66
    Roger Moore says:

    @jeffreyw:
    A chicken in every pot … pie.

  67. 67
    Capri says:

    I live outside any city limits, but in a subdivision that takes itself very seriously. I’ve opted to go for ducks rather than chickens because they are quieter for one, but also because for some reason people think a few ducks are “pets” while a few chickens are livestock.

    Their eggs taste just as good and are larger than a chickens.

  68. 68
    maryQ says:

    I wonder whether 2012 will be the year that Obama finally uses drones in the War on Christmas.

  69. 69
    Ruckus says:

    Betty
    My neighbors chickens scream like the dickens to be let out into the yard. The reason they are not let out anymore is that a hawk or falcon flew into the coup and killed two of them on separate occasions. Walking by one morning I saw the bird of pray in the coup and chased it off. The hawk had about a 3 1/2-4 foot wing span but could not fly with a chicken in it’s claws and fit through the door. Had to fold it’s wings and dive through the door then start flying again. Pretty amazing to be that close.

  70. 70
    cckids says:

    @Betty Cracker:

    I flat-out refuse to live anywhere with a powerful HOA. I’d much rather put up with chartreuse paint jobs, washing machine planters in the yard, etc. Hell, I’d rather live next door to a pig farm.

    No kidding. I swear I don’t have a libertarian bone in my body, but the idea that a committee of my neighbors can tell me what color my front door/house can & can’t be, or what trees & flowers I can plant in my own yard just makes me crazy. Not for me.

  71. 71

    @Higgs Boson’s Mate:

    Au contraire. The Orb has been invented. It’s called Ecstasy.

    :-)

  72. 72
    General Stuck says:

    including Quaker parrots

    And anti war parrots, at that. Polly want a Quaker?

  73. 73
    Roger Moore says:

    @maryQ:

    I wonder whether 2012 will be the year that Obama finally uses drones in the War on Christmas.

    ITYM DROOOOONEZZZZZ‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼

  74. 74
    slag says:

    @Southern Beale: I’m looking for an easy-to-use graphics program into which I can scan a map or diagram and have it distinguish the text from the color fill from the outlines and then allow me to select and add or remove layers based on those categorical attributes. Basically, an image layering program that’s both simpler and more complex than Photoshop in different respects. Mostly to be used as an educational tool.

    I don’t know if this has been invented yet.

  75. 75
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Betty Cracker: I quit a two-pack-a-day smoking habit nearly 20 years ago, when I had a heart attack. I was stubbing out a cigarette when I phoned 911, and by the time the ambulance arrived I absolutely KNEW without question that I was an ex-smoker.

    That was easy, I’ve never had another smoke, and in my conscious daily life I not only don’t miss it at all, I am quite offended being around smokers. But apparently some little piece of me still craves nicotine, because I have very frequent recurring dreams in which I am smoking, and they are invariably so realistic that I wake up really wondering whether I’ve taken up the habit again. After two decades! Weird.

  76. 76
    Roger Moore says:

    @cckids:
    As long as the HOA is a voluntary association of like-minded citizens, shouldn’t libertarians believe that it’s just fine? It’s only governments that they object to.

  77. 77
    trollhattan says:

    @Betty Cracker:
    Wife of a former Cow-Orker got so fed up with being cited and fined by the HOA at their vacation cabin (untidy distribution of pine needles and such) that she took it upon herself to haunt the state capitol and actually spurred legislation to restrict their powers…a bit. They basically had unfettered power to levy miscreants with fines and then, if unpaid, put a lien on the property.

    Never mess with an old lady in tennis shoes!

  78. 78
    Schlemizel says:

    @Another Halocene Human:

    Having lived in FLorida for a few years I’d choose to wave with my thumb and 3 of my fingers tucked in.

    But thats just me, I’m sort of a sorehead

  79. 79
    trollhattan says:

    @SiubhanDuinne:
    Good for you!

    My father finally quit smoking–never had another after his lung and brain cancer diagnosis. My mother had quit well before that and oulived him by more than twenty years. He picked up the habit while in the Navy, as the cigarette makers selflessly helped our effort to get Tojo by supplying them for free (either that or the gummint bought them and gave them away).

  80. 80
    cckids says:

    @Roger Moore: Maybe so, but that argument is WAY to full of logic to pass muster with any libertarians I know.

  81. 81
    Betty Cracker says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: Wow, glad you made it! That is powerful motivation for sure. I know what you mean about the nicotine dreams. I had a very vivid smoking dream awhile back, and even in the dream, I was so mad at myself for falling off the wagon! I was relieved when I woke up and realized it was just a dream.

  82. 82
    Violet says:

    Hey, Betty, check for mites. A friend who has chickens, their chickens had mites and squawked a lot more when cooped up. The mites were in the coop itself because it was made with untreated lumber.

  83. 83
    JoyfulA says:

    @Capri: When I lived in a big-city rowhouse neighborhood, with kitchen-size backyards surrounded by high fences (in other words, very urban), for years I heard ducks quacking without ever learning who kept ducks.

  84. 84
    Belafon (formerly anonevent) says:

    @Betty Cracker: We have an HOA where I live, but other than complaining about stuff in the yards, they can’t do anything. The rest of us refuse to show up in sufficient enough numbers for them to have a quorum. The one thing they are good for is making sure the entrances are mowed.

  85. 85
    trollhattan says:

    @Roger Moore:

    Can you imagine the Libertarian HOA board meetings? All that time taken up debating whether the declaration should read, “hereby officially declare that we despise” or “declare that we loathe and oppose Obamacare.”

    Also, too, “No Priuses.”

    A local subdivision has a rule against a garage door being open for more than fifteen minutes.

  86. 86
    trollhattan says:

    @JoyfulA:
    Google Earth satellite resolution is pretty good these days. Maybe you can find out now?

  87. 87
    rdldot says:

    @JoyfulA: Don’t know if you’re still here, but I’ve been using ecigs for 6 months now. Google ‘Steve K Vaping World’ – they have a lot of good advice on their website. I got mine from Totally Wicked, but I usually get my ejuice from Liberty Flights. It costs about $30/month once you get the initial outlay (around $100). The Totally Wicked people are really helpful – call and they’ll also give you a discount over the phone. What I initially did was get one of the disposibles to see if I would like it, but they are expensive to use every day. Just see if he likes it first before buying the other stuff.

  88. 88

    @slag:

    Hmm. I’m surprised such a thing doesn’t exist, seems like it would be a useful thing to have. OK thanks for that …

  89. 89
    Roger Moore says:

    @cckids:
    I would think that the best libertarian counter-argument would be to claim that a HOA is a de facto microgovernment. Despite what people say, they aren’t really a voluntary association; everyone who lives in the area covered by the HOA falls under their jurisdiction no matter how much they wish otherwise. Saying that HOA membership is voluntary is like saying that a city government is voluntary because anyone who doesn’t like it can live in a different city. HOA dues are just like taxes, HOA expenditures are just like government programs, and CCRs are just like local ordinances. If it looks like a government and acts like a government, a libertarian really ought to treat it like a government.

  90. 90
  91. 91
    Schlemizel says:

    I saw a picture yesterday of a guy somewhere that was not allowed to put up a shed for his horses (that may have been zoning rather than HOA but the concept is similar).

    So the guy put up what I think would be an art project of a table and two chairs, The scale is such that the horses and easily shade under them. He even had a table cloth on the table.

    I’ll see if I can find the image, its hilarious

  92. 92
    JoyfulA says:

    @trollhattan: I probably could, but that was going on 20 years ago, and I didn’t really care anyway. The combination of trolley bells and quacking was pleasant.

  93. 93
    wesindc says:

    @J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford:

    ROFL
    Same episode

    Donnie’s pants are getting tight!

  94. 94
    Punchy says:

    @General Stuck: Megyn Kelly is TEH HAWT.

  95. 95
    slag says:

    @Southern Beale: Also, I’m looking for an organization-in-a-box type of situation that basically combines all of the operational tools needed for a tiny organization behind one interface. Preferably one that makes use of the tools and interfaces that I already use. For instance, gmail, Google Drive, etc, are great, but Google sites blows, and there’s no easy way to get a simple, light weight relational database into the mix. Not to mention other handy customer relationship management tools, such as email marketing and list managers. All the importing and exporting that people have to do to accomplish the most basic of tasks…why? And don’t even mention Microsoft unless you want me to shoot you.

    Oh, Google, hear my prayers…

  96. 96
    Violet says:

    @trollhattan: A local subdivision near me has a rule against any kind of edible anything in the front yard. That includes things like rosemary that are evergreen where I live. Forget fruit trees or any kind of vegetables.

  97. 97
    MikeJ says:

    @Roger Moore:

    I would think that the best libertarian counter-argument would be to claim that a HOA is a de facto microgovernment. Despite what people say, they aren’t really a voluntary association; everyone who lives in the area covered by the HOA falls under their jurisdiction no matter how much they wish otherwise.

    You’ve never actually spoken to a libertarian, have you? They aren’t capable of siding with the powerless over the powerful. Simply can’t do it. Having power and money proves you are a better person and should have power and money.

  98. 98
    Roger Moore says:

    @MikeJ:
    I’ve met enough libertarians to know that they’ll make up their mind first and pick an argument to support their beliefs second. If they’re pissed at their HOA, they’ll be more than happy to come up with some kind of argument for why whatever it’s trying to do is illegitimate. Calling it a microgovernment seems like an argument that actually fits with the facts and with libertarian ideology. What’s not to like?

  99. 99
    Schlemizel says:

    Found the picture!

    denied a shelter permit, so they built a table

    Supposedly near Port St. Lucie, Fla

  100. 100
    General Stuck says:

    @Punchy:

    You think Betty’s hens are hot. Though so would I, a little.

  101. 101
    piratedan says:

    @Higgs Boson’s Mate: haven’t reached the bottom of the thread, but this came to mind

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8yQhXDquII

    The Nozzle

  102. 102
    jibeaux says:

    I’m also just here to say that I can’t bear HOAs. A friend lived in one with an enforcer dude on a bike who went around making sure the trash and recycling bins weren’t put out too early or brought back too late. Who has time for that shit?

  103. 103
    trollhattan says:

    @JoyfulA:
    Everybody loves a mystery (so long as it didn’t drive you quackers). :-)

  104. 104
    PurpleGirl says:

    @Schlemizel: I love it. They can claim it’s an art project; can’t say that it isn’t.

  105. 105
    trollhattan says:

    @Punchy:
    Also, too, did I detect a glimmer of self-awareness from Her Hawtness in those videos, like she know’s it’s all kabuki, Ailes-style?

  106. 106
    22over7 says:

    @jeffreyw: I want to live in your neighborhood. I’ll bring the wine.

  107. 107
    trollhattan says:

    @Schlemizel:

    By gawd that’s a complete win!

  108. 108
    IowaOldLady says:

    My neighborhood association sent this around a couple of weeks ago:

    White/Clear Lights Only: Please use white/clear lights only. Trees should be placed on your yard (not the parking) approximately 5 feet from the sidewalk and equally spaced across your yard.

    Fortunately they are not the boss of us. Still, I might have to buy a giant inflatable Santa.

  109. 109
    trollhattan says:

    @jibeaux:

    Who has time for that shit?

    George Zimmerman comes to mind.

  110. 110
    Tom Johnson says:

    Small point: Fox News want the President to create a Secretary of Business position for Mitt Romney. There’s no such job. So, wouldn’t a Secretary of Business be exactly the kind of cross-functional manager the press refers to as a czar? And weren’t conservatives in general and Fox News in particular apoplectic about Obama’s extra-constitutional use of czars? Weren’t they talking about impeaching Obama for his great threat to liberty?

  111. 111
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    @IowaOldLady: Heh. I’m not a big holiday decorator, and I tend to prefer the understated lights, but a letter like that might just prompt me to make inquiries into renting a Rankin & Bass lawn scene featuring Rudolph, Yukon Cornelius and the Abominibable, and the Heat and Snow Misers, preferably all dancing. And Santa kneeling before a well-lit manger. Let the heathens complain about that and I’d call my local Fox affiliate. Or not.

  112. 112
    Violet says:

    @IowaOldLady: “Trees should be placed on your yard”? Do people buy trees for outside their houses? And WTF on the “clear lights only”? Bunch of people with too much time on their hands.

  113. 113
    Ruckus says:

    @trollhattan:
    I believe that the tobacco pushers gave them away or sold them at ridiculous prices in the military to get lifelong customers. Guys would line up at the ships store as soon as we got far enough off shore to avoid the taxes and buy all they could. A carton was something like 4 or 5 bucks if memory serves, may have been less. Between low cost cigs and clubs that served alcohol at less cost than bottled water we created an awful lot of smoking drunks. This was 40 yrs ago and I understand that this attitude has changed a lot.

  114. 114
    The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik says:

    For those that are interested, there’s something on CNN.com butting back against that abysmal ‘War on Men’ claptrap from Fox News.

    Good article…so depressingly, the comments are all full of comments frothing against the evils of feminism and persisting that the War on White Men is real and extra-destructive.

  115. 115
    slag says:

    @Southern Beale: Ooooh…and another thing I’d like is a real world pattern recognizer. There are pattern recognition apps all over the place, but they’re mostly static and only good at recognizing specific products or objects. Let’s say I’m in a party or other social situation. If I take a sweep of the room with a video camera, I want something that can pull out patterns that I might not even recognize myself. Not just stuff like how many people are wearing red shirts, but maybe how many people are eating crudites with dip v. without dip. Beyond which, I’d want to be able to set a camera up in a room and have it recognize all kinds of traffic patterns, socializing patterns, seating patterns, etc.

    At this point, I’m kind of torn between thinking that I’m some sort of freak for wanting something like this and thinking that of course something like this already exists.

  116. 116
    Violet says:

    @The Snarxist Formerly Known as Kryptik: Speaking of CNN, Jeff Zucker is taking the top spot there. I do not have high hopes he’ll do anything good with it.

  117. 117
    trollhattan says:

    @Tom Johnson:
    Wouldn’t that make Willard one of those “czars” we were hearing so much about a couple years back?

  118. 118
    peach flavored shampoo says:

    You think Betty’s hens are hot. Though so would I, a little.

    Are “hens” slang for her backsides or top frontsides?

  119. 119
    👽 Martin says:

    Its funny, I live in what many consider the iconic planned community/HOA in the nation. It’s widely derided as being horribly authoritarian, and yet we’ve never seen that side of it. We’ve done half a dozen things outside of the CC&R, asked for permission each time, gave them samples or plans (which we needed to do anyway) and they said ‘sure, that’s fine’. 3 of the things went into the revised CC&Rs as approved for everyone. No big fight, no going before a board. Usually just 2-3 emails, or a couple of phone calls. We make sure the neighbors aren’t surprised by anything, but we don’t seek their permission. Our immediate neighbor, who has lived there for 25 years has done a ton of work on her home since we moved in. Why? She always assumed everything would get turned down and never tried. I know a lot of people take that as an infringement on their liberty, but it’s such a trivial thing to do and neighbor disputes are nearly unheard of that it’s hardly a hardship. We’ve never had anything we wanted to do turned down. Actually, they did sort of turn one thing down, but they actually talked us into doing something that wound up being a better idea – and also an exception, which they approved on the spot since it was their idea.

    But it’s a nice place to live. Lots to do, very community feel to it thanks to the HOA because they organize a lot of the difficult stuff – swim lessons for the kids (they go up through lifeguard certification and then hire the teenagers to run the classes and be lifeguards), tennis lessons (same thing), big fireworks show on the 4th, and so on. No chickens, but they’re not allowed anywhere in the city not zoned for agriculture, so that’s not the HOAs fault.

  120. 120
    IowaOldLady says:

    @Violet: The “trees” they’re talking about have a square base with a pole in the middle and light strings running from the top of the pole to each corner of the base. Lots of people in our neighborhood have them and Mr. IowaOldLady built some.

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: I think that sounds lovely.

  121. 121
    Ash Can says:

    OK, Charles Johnson over at LGF has a story up at his joint that made me laugh out loud with sheer glee. It seems that there’s some buzz going around that maybe Al Gore should be nominated for Sec of State. Stroke of genius, that — let all the Repubs keep running around in circles and loading their pants over Susan Rice, then spring arguably the second most popular US pol worldwide behind Obama himself on their sorry asses. My first inclination if that were to happen would be to run to the store for a huge box of popcorn and a case of beer, and to make a “Go Al!” pennant to wave during the hearings.

  122. 122
    peach flavored shampoo says:

    And Santa kneeling before a well-lit manger

    Or if you really want to fire ’em up, maybe Mrs. Santa kneeling in front of Santa?

  123. 123
    The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge says:

    @J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford:

    “Donnie” was awesome.

    “My pants are tight!”

  124. 124
    catclub says:

    @Tom Johnson: I suspect they do not know there is a Secretary of Commerce? Which is where they try to put CEO’s for ‘business outreach’.

    Someone on the internets noted that CEO’s in general do not do well in government. Actually getting people who are not under you, to agree on things, is not their strength, but is kind of necessary in (non-dictatorial) governments

  125. 125
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @Tom Johnson: Secretary of Commerce isn’t good enough?

  126. 126
    Violet says:

    @IowaOldLady: Ah, okay. I didn’t understand what they were saying.

    @Ash Can: That would be fun. Although didn’t Al Gore have a few issues with some massage therapist a few years ago? Followed by he and his wife divorcing?

  127. 127
    Ruckus says:

    @Tom Johnson:
    How about

    Secretary of Complete Fucking Losers
    He’d be in charge of the conservative loons.

    Secretary of Business Assholes
    At least this way we might have a way to know where to find them with the pikes and machetes

  128. 128
    Geoduck says:

    @the Conster:

    My Obot sister in Ponte Vedra has some…. interesting…. stories about post-election encounters. Did you know Obama killed 5 people?

    Presumably they meant he did it in person, which, yes, is stupid. But.. he’s the president, and one thing presidents do is order people to be killed.

  129. 129
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @slag: NSA has probably had that for a decade.

  130. 130
    👽 Martin says:

    @peach flavored shampoo:

    Or if you really want to fire ‘em up, maybe Mrs. Santa kneeling in front of Santa?

    Or if you really, really want to fire them up, Yukon Cornelius kneeling in front of Santa.

  131. 131
    JoyfulA says:

    @rdldot: Wow, thanks! There’s enough information there to give me a headache. He did quit for 15 years before, so it’s doable for him. He doesn’t like the gum, the patches didn’t work even with the meds that supposedly help, and maybe this will do it, starting with a disposable, I guess.

  132. 132
    Fwiffo says:

    There’s this alarm that goes off occasionally in an outdoor utility closet next to my bedroom in my apartment complex. It’s annoying trying to sleep at night when it’s going off because it’s this slow, just audible beep-beep that sounds like a backing up truck and it takes them a couple days to fix usually.

    The worst part is that the mockingbirds in the area pick up on it, and are soon making beep beep approximations on their own which persists for a few nights after they fix the alarm.

  133. 133
    👽 Martin says:

    @Gin & Tonic:

    Secretary of Commerce isn’t good enough?

    He’s not really skilled in Commerce. More like Secretary of Corporate Raiding and Wage Destruction. Or Secretary of Keeping Borrowed Money and Making the Serfs Pay it Off Through Toil and Personal Sacrifice.

    Needs a catchier anagram though.

  134. 134
    Xenos says:

    @anibundel:

    Our HOA has no rules against chickens.
    The minute we try to have some, there will be a rule against them within 30 days.

    Then you escalate… to peacocks. When they tell you to get rid of them you can sue, then appeal, and so on. Within a few weeks they will be begging you to go back to chickens.

  135. 135
    The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge says:

    @wesindc:

    I’ll ahem myself—hadn’t finished the thread.

  136. 136
    General Stuck says:

    @peach flavored shampoo:

    Are “hens” slang for her backsides or top frontsides?

    You talking breasts and thighs? I like both. Cole slaw, also too.

  137. 137
    mdblanche says:

    @👽 Martin: Secretary of Corporation Adulation, Money Making, and Erasure of Regulations

  138. 138
    Matthew Reid Krell says:

    @The Red Pen: Hooray, slut-shaming.

  139. 139
    Felonius Monk says:

    @BettyCracker:

    Any ideas or suggestions? (I mean aside from making chicken pot pies!)

    Do chicken pot pies lay eggs? :)

  140. 140
    Bill Arnold says:

    @Violet:

    …a rule against any kind of edible anything in the front yard.

    I would feel compelled to get silly about such a rule. e.g. a worm farm (are worms edible?), or maybe an osage orange tree.

  141. 141
    fleeting expletive says:

    Been using an e-cig for almost a year. I keep about 4 of them, rotating on the charger so none gets worn out too fast. I started with one of the kind of expensive, e-liquid refillables but when the battery died I didn’t want to spend that much on it. The nicotine cartridges on the disposable can actually be refilled multiple times with the e-liquid. Turns out not to be expensive at all. I quit for 12 years once, but apparently am not ready to let go of the “behaviors” of inhaling, and the e-cig accommodates that.

  142. 142
    Higgs Boson's Mate says:

    @Tom Johnson

    Small point: Fox News want the President to create a Secretary of Business position for Mitt Romney.

    Right, only they should name it The Department of Redundancy Department.

    “Secretary of Business” BWAHAHAHAHA

  143. 143
    dollared says:

    @Higgs Boson’s Mate: How about the Secretary of Getting Coffee for the The Real President, Like Right Now White Guy?

  144. 144
    rdldot says:

    @JoyfulA: I read about it for a whole month before I felt comfortable enough to know what to ask for. There is a lot of variation in the different devieces. But there is also a lot of info out there, and lots of different companies. It’s a nitch market so also a lot of competition. Good luck. I’m very happy with mine. You can use it to ween yourself off of nicotine because the liquid (ejuice) comes in different strengths. But most companies don’t promote that aspect. At best, it is considered a ‘harm reduction strategy’.

  145. 145
    Roger Moore says:

    @Bill Arnold:
    I’m thinking that edible flowers might be a good choice. Also, too, plants that generate edible things that most people don’t think about, like roses for rose hips.

  146. 146
    YellowJournalism says:

    @IowaOldLady: There is a great episode of Roseanne where the Conners get a letter asking “certain families” in the neighbourhood to tone down their lights and be tasteful, so they retaliate by going Griswold-house-on-steroids tacky. The best part was when they hung a sign from a Mexican restaurant that had a Feliz Navidad message ad advertised Ladies’ Night margaritas.

    So what I’m saying is: Do you have any Mexican restaurants or bars in your area?

    Also, I saw an Angry Birds Christmas display set at Canadian Tire up here. You should check down there for one.

  147. 147
    trollhattan says:

    @Bill Arnold:
    We have a mock orange (pittosporum) in the front yard. Have heard it mocking actual orange trees on our street.

  148. 148
    Bill Arnold says:

    @Roger Moore:

    edible flowers might be a good choice.

    That might work. One would need to pick the nasturtiums (or whatever) in very obviously agricultural way, maybe with a produce basket.

  149. 149
    JoyfulA says:

    @fleeting expletive: Hey, thanks for the tips! Especially about reusing the disposables. Here’s hoping progress will be made.

  150. 150
    IowaOldLady says:

    @YellowJournalism: Oh, you are full of good ideas! Sadly, there are no Mexican restaurants in my town. Not unless you count Taco Bell.

    We moved here from Detroit, and I really miss Middle Eastern food.

  151. 151
    catclub says:

    @Bill Arnold: I thought the point was to demand that the particularly officious HOA member that sends letters to get rid of edibles in the front yards, be told to remove their rose bushes.

  152. 152
    JoyfulA says:

    @rdldot: From what I was reading at the site you recommended, it’s illegal for manufacturers to claim it as a stop-smoking method. In a niche market, it probably wouldn’t be worth any one company’s while to run experiments to prove it.

  153. 153
    YellowJournalism says:

    @Interrobang: My dad quit for a while using the hypnotism method after being a volunteer during a hypnotist’s show. Dad performed as Elvis for a bit, then the guy did personalized hypnotic suggestions for his volunteers when the show was done. My dad doesn’t swear a whole lot, so it was funny to hear how the cigarettes he tried to smoke “tasted like shhhhitt” for weeks after the hypnotism. It wasn’t what made him ultimately quit (I think that was me and my sis, something about being a good example. Go figure!), but it got him seriously thinking about it for he months before he finally did it cold-turkey.

  154. 154
    Schlemizel says:

    @Ruckus:

    Hell they gave them away for free in WWII – my uncles all came back hooked & it killed a couple of them.

    The did it in WWI also, my grandfather talked about the troop ship home. He went up on deck to have a smoke, thought “this is stupid” and tossed his pack overboard. Never smoked again.

    I know in the late 60’s the PX in Frankfurt sold them for 10 cents a pack and a six pack of beer was around a buck I believe. Hard not to smoke & drink at those prices.

    The merchants of death knew what they were doing though – that first pack was free.

  155. 155
    Schlemizel says:

    @Violet:

    Come on its Jeff f’ing Zucker! He should do for CNN what he did to NBC! They will be behind “Springfield Tonight” in cable ratings, one step up from the Knitting Channel.

  156. 156
    normal liberal says:

    @👽 Martin: Seaside?

    I’m saving the horse-under-table photo for my file labeled “people sticking it to the zoning board creatively.”

  157. 157
    John says:

    @Ruckus: Sea store cigarettes were 1 dollar a carton when I was in in the 70s

  158. 158
    YellowJournalism says:

    @IowaOldLady: You could also fake them out by setting up a wonderfully tasteful white light display that’s hooked up to change colours and flash in time to the Jom Nabors Christmas album. (I would say McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmas Time,” but I’d fear for your safety.)

  159. 159
    trollhattan says:

    @Schlemizel:
    As much as I can recall the old man’s tales, they were included in rations and freely available on ship while they were at sea (WWII). By then the tobacco companies knew damn well how addictive their product was.

    In the ’60s I recall being on vacation in the Big City (Manhattan) when I was a wee sprout, and cigarette ladies were walking around handing out free packs. Advertising, you know.

  160. 160
  161. 161
    1badbaba3 says:

    @comrade scott’s agenda of rage: Wow, that is disturbing on a number of levels. I don’t object to him being a heinie man ( I’m kinda one as well), but Dude, not your daughter’s heinie. If some guy was spending that much time and effort bending my daughter over a trunk or a motorcycle and taking pictures of it I would be homicidal. And yet this guy obviously has a different parenting style.

    Somethin’ ain’t right there. Seems like there is more to this story, and it’s prolly really, exceedingly gross, gross, gross.

    Now, for relaxing, steaming hot, Silkwood shower of brain bleach. Ewww.

  162. 162
    scav says:

    many parts of the pine tree are edible

    ETA: maples? out, syrup. Nut bearers? nuh-uh. not even oaks, acorns make flour. We’ve not even hit the herbish cohort.

  163. 163
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    Watching Bob Corker string together a series of non-sequiturs about Benghazi and Al Qaeda, unchallenged by Tweety.

  164. 164
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    Corker: Susan Rice strikes me as more of a political operative…

    Tweety: Right

    ETA: I haven’t seen Tweety suck up to wingers like this since the height of the Clenis Days.

  165. 165
    Ben Franklin says:

    RT News reporting Palestinians have gained Statehood at UN….no corroboration yet

  166. 166
    Bill Arnold says:

    @catclub:

    …be told to remove their rose bushes.

    Doh. Didn’t see that tactic – going on the offensive would be fun too.
    My (very new, hasn’t even met yet) neighborhood association doesn’t allow any sort of farm animal. Nobody has tested the rules yet. Wild turkey families are OK. Coyotes are OK. Deer are OK.

  167. 167
  168. 168
    👽 Martin says:

    @normal liberal:

    Seaside?

    Woodbridge.

  169. 169
    Ruckus says:

    @John:
    I figured it was pretty cheap. I had stopped smoking a while before but even then I was rolling my own, so purchasing premade wasn’t happening. I do recall that rolling was even cheaper and besides I needed the practice for other substances. I’ve just tried to forget all about being a smoker.

  170. 170
    General Stuck says:

    @normal liberal:

    normal liberal

    Thank the Lard, you finally arrived. The place has turned into a snake pit for the abnormal of late. Bunch of fucking aminals.

    Wanna see me bait a firebagger? Free gratis.

  171. 171
    the Conster says:

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    He’s been really good on this subject the last couple of nights. I think he’s just mailing it in tonight. There’s no there there, as he’s been pointing out.

  172. 172
    Ben Franklin says:

    It’s official. Abbas wants a birth certificate in honor of Birfers who might want to dispute the authenticity, heh.

    http://www.reuters.com/article.....J520121129

  173. 173
    Elizabelle says:

    @Schlemizel:

    Link, please, to where you got this. (Horsies under the table)

    It made my day.

  174. 174
    Raven says:

    @trollhattan: We always had smokes in c-rats.

  175. 175
    Elizabelle says:

    banner atop NYTimes:

    U.N. Grants Palestine Status of Nonmember Observer State in 138-9 Vote; 41 Abstain

    (Who else is a nonmember observer state? Anyone?)

  176. 176
    Ruckus says:

    @Schlemizel:
    Thinking about it, all of my uncles smoked as well as my dad. Most of them stopped somewhere around 50 yrs old. One died of emphysema in his 70’s, one of cancer about the same age. Dad stopped when his doc told him not to bother to come back cause he’d be dead in 5-10 yrs anyway if he didn’t. Threw out his last pack next day and never fired up another one. He did chew for a while and that was even more disgusting to be around.

  177. 177
    spudvol says:

    @Elizabelle:

    (Who else is a nonmember observer state? Anyone?)

    Galtsgulchistan

  178. 178
    normal liberal says:

    @General Stuck: My normality is strictly geographic – sorry to disappoint.
    And I prefer to bait my own, thanks.

  179. 179
    gelfling545 says:

    @trollhattan: I had entertained the idea of moving to a condo in my retirement years. Then I did some temp work for a guy who was a property manager for several condo developments locally and dealt with a lot of HOAs. OH. MY. GOD. What a bunch of controlling, nosy, under-entertained people. Discussions about people cooking food they don’t like the smell of (un-American), people flushing their toilets at night; gods know what all & trying to make RULES restricting it all. No condo for me, never.

  180. 180
    Capri says:

    @Xenos: Either that or in 6 months you’ll have an ostrich ranch.

  181. 181
    👽 Martin says:

    @Elizabelle: Vatican. Does this mean Palestinians need to start diddling boys?

    Raw deal, man.

  182. 182
    Elizabelle says:

    @trollhattan:

    Tragic story, re the dead animal control officer.

    Would otherwise laugh, since shooter lives in Galt.

    (Always thought of photographing the city limits sign and posting it here, but never did.)

  183. 183
    penpen says:

    Random, inconsequential wtf of the day: when did ED Kain’s blog at Forbes become exclusively about video games??

    http://blogs.forbes.com/erikkain/

  184. 184
    the Conster says:

    @Geoduck:

    They think Obama did it all by himself.

  185. 185
    trollhattan says:

    @gelfling545:
    It can be ridiculous. My mom lived in a nice, small condo building (9 units IIRC) for a decade or so and the board just did whatever the hell they wanted. Nine units needs a board?

    Redecorate the elevator and assess everybody a thousand bucks? Hey, why not! Chop down the flowering cherries that provide a balcony view and screen from the neighboring apartments? Done! Reassign my mom’s parking space to somebody else and move her to the furthest space from the parking garage door (and hard as hell to park in). Do it yesterday, lady.

    They’re lucky I lived two states away.

  186. 186
    the Conster says:

    @gelfling545:

    Friends of mine moved into a new development with certain deed restrictions – there was no hanging out laundry to dry, and someone came by to tell them that everyone’s lawn needed to be the same color green at the same time and were told what fertilizer to use and when. “Stepford” came to mind.

  187. 187
    Mnemosyne says:

    @SiubhanDuinne:
    @Betty Cracker:

    Those dreams are apparently very common for anyone in recovery (not just ex-smokers, but also ex-drinkers, ex-heroin users, etc.) Psychologists say that they’re actually a very good sign, because your brain is imagining what it would be like to go back to using and rejecting the idea.

  188. 188
    Patrick says:

    When hens are ready to lay they are ready to lay. They are in a hurry, don’t like to be seen, and impatient. Many times, the whole flock of hens will want to lay in one particular nest box. Even with a whole row, they like one over the others. If a hen comes to that box and another is in there, squawking will start. Sometimes, two or more hens try and squeeze in while squawking. Most likely, this is what is going on.

    Not sure how you can cure it. You could try putting more nest boxes in. If it is a case of one bird going in there at 9 and bullying the other birds (i.e. playing king of the nest box), you could remove it. But that is tedious. It could be such a hen has gone broody.

    I would say that I doubt the hens make that much noise and it should sort itself out. If you are providing artificial light, you could stop it and maybe there wouldn’t be so much laying. Up North, with the lack of daylight, laying would be sparse, but I would guess in Florida your days are about the same year round.

    Patrick

  189. 189

    @slag:

    Now you are speaking to me. An “organization in a box” thing, so are you thinking a device? Or an app? I’m trying to envision such a thing. Intriguing.

  190. 190

    @slag:

    Also your other idea, the pattern organizer idea … very intriguing.

    I’m a little interested in knowing why you want to know this stuff. Are you one of those stealth marketers wanting to know who eats the corn chips and who eats the potato chips and why? :-)

  191. 191
    redshirt says:

    Another big thumbs up for Electronic cigarettes. I switched 6 months ago and have not had a single temptation for a cigarette since. I’ve not tried quitting the ecigs and I am no rush too, since it’s damn cheap. I’ve spent 60 bucks over 6 months on the nicotine fluid. The initial ecigs I got were very nice and permanent, but pricey – $130 for the kit (two ecigs, 5 vaporizer heads, holding case, etc). But that seems a small price to pay for quitting smoking.

    I tried quitting cold turkey dozens and dozens of times and always failed – whether it was after 3 days or even 3 months. I am feeling confident I won’t fail again.

    Also too: Pine trees are edible. Try eating the top of a new shoot in spring. Surprisingly tasty.

  192. 192
    slag says:

    @Southern Beale: Cloud-based. Just logging in through the web browser should easily open up the entire operational world of a small organization. No more Filemaker Pro for accounting, Salesforce for employee and CRM (and whatever awkwardly complicated email marketing plugins they add on there), Outlook (ick) for email, etc etc. I want one interface to rule them all. And no multiple sources for the same data or exporting/important chaos either. When an email bounces, automatically offer to update the goddamned database with a simple click.

  193. 193
    slag says:

    @Southern Beale: Nope. Since you asked, I’m actually thinking of it in terms of education. Superficially, I think standardized tests are stupid and don’t address problems. If we can measure something as small as a change in a kid’s posture at her desk or the frequency with which she engages others over time, that could mean something more substantive. But really, I don’t know. That kind of thing just seems like it could have a lot of uses.

  194. 194
    Death Panel Truck says:

    But they’ve generally become noisier lately, and it worries me

    It should worry you. They know something you don’t. It’s a portent of impending doom they’re sensing: The Zombie Apocalypse.

    Animals know these things before humans do.

  195. 195
    JenJen says:

    @JoyfulA: I quit smoking many, many times before it finally took, and it’s because of e-cigs. I tried nicotine patches, nicotine gum, even that gawd-awful Chantrix pill. I always started up again; it usually only took a few months.

    So I thought I’d try e-cigs, because it really wasn’t the nicotine I was missing, it was the drag on a cigarette. It’s the kind of thing only smokers could understand having a lifelong craving for. I tried Blu, and bought one of those starter kits at my local Walgreens. I liked the idea of being able to run to the drugstore to get a refill if I ran out, and I loved that they came in a “cigarette pack” that also acts as a battery charger. I was completely surprised at how much like actual smoking it felt. When I started running low on the starter cartridges, I went online to their website to order more and the prices were entirely reasonable. My initial starter pack was full-nicotine; I stepped down to “light” for a few months and then “ultra-light” which I still use. There is a non-nicotine option as well, but as it turns out, I hardly even need to hit a Blu cig anymore. I might take ten puffs a day, tops. The cartridges seem to last forever. Also, my starter pack has a social feature! If I’m out somewhere and someone is “vaping” with a Blu cig, my pack lights up and vibrates! Does the same when I’m at a retailer who carries Blu!

    By the way, next week, it will be 18 months (!!) since I had an actual cigarette. I can’t imagine ever going back. The e-cigs absolutely were the fix I needed. I don’t crave actual cigarettes at all anymore, and anytime I feel a little stressed or have an unbeatable craving, a couple puffs and a couple vapes and I’m fine. I realize they don’t work for everyone, and not “vaping” at all is probably better, but cold turkey doesn’t work for me, so they really are worth a shot. I highly recommend the Blu cigs and if your hubby takes to the whole e-cig concept, there are so many other options available on line if he’s not crazy about Blu. By the way, the Vanilla flavor is yum!!

  196. 196
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Mnemosyne:
    Thank you for that, Mnem. I’ve not heard that before, and it’s reassuring. (And now that I know what it means, I wonder whether the smoking dreams will just stop.) I have a number of friends successfully in AA. Next time I see them I’m going to ask whether they’ve had drinking dreams. Very interesting.

  197. 197
    redshirt says:

    @JenJen: Congrats JenJen. My experience is pretty much identical. It’s funny too, because I started researching ecigs a couple of years back, and then started talking them up with my smoking crew at work. One of the guys in the crew – 30 year hard core smoker – made the switch based on my research, and quit cigarettes immediately. He loved it, and you could see the change in his physical appearance. He looked better. He then became the ecig evangelist, but for whatever reason it took me another 2 years of fucking cigarettes before I believed him, and myself.

  198. 198
    JenJen says:

    @redshirt: That’s so awesome. I absolutely feel health benefits from switching, and like your crew member, it worked so well for me and I feel and look so much better, I can understand being a little evangelical about ecigs and vaping!

  199. 199
    redshirt says:

    @JenJen: Big thumbs up! :) I’m pretty evangelical at this point too. I feel great, and not just physically. To be free of the fire and the smoke and that whole deal is just enormous, mentally. Life changing! I saw someone smoking the other day and had a bit of a mental shock, as it seemed to foreign, and yet that we me just 6 months ago. And for so long before that.

    For my own record, I want to disparage American Spirit cigarettes. I had pretty much quit until I discovered these cigarettes and they are very different than the Marlboros/Camels I was familiar with. They got me re-hooked, much to my shame/chagrin. They were too good, relatively.

  200. 200
    Amir Khalid says:

    Does anyone here remember The X-Files episode (Arcadia, from season 6) about the evil HOA in a gated community? Mulder and Scully go in undercover as a married couple to investigate the mysterious disappearances. Mulder has loads of fun yanking the local conformists’ chain, and especially yanking Scully’s chain about playing house.

  201. 201
    JenJen says:

    @redshirt: Oh no!! Our experience really is exactly the same, isn’t it? Those damned American Spirits! So delicious. Last cig I ever smoked was, of course, an American Spirit. It’s like breaking up with an amazing lover, it is.

    And it is an enormous life change. No more lighters, no more midnight cig runs, no more smelly clothes, no more freezing outdoors. It’s kind of weird, honestly. I still check myself from time to time.

  202. 202
    redshirt says:

    @JenJen: Heh. Yeah. I ran marathons and did a half ironman while technically a smoker. On Marlboro/Camel yet this was maybe 20 cigarettes a week, and most of that on the weekend. Yet that was small cheese compared to American Spirits. I ran 5 miles a day, 4 days a week, while smoking full packs of American Spirits every two days, for about 3 years. I hardly believe it myself, and yet here I am, typing it up.

  203. 203
    The Red Pen says:

    @Matthew Reid Krell:

    Hooray, slut-shaming.

    Acknowledging that a woman has probably had sex before in her life is not “slut shaming” you smug, repressed, turdpile.

  204. 204
    Mary says:

    @Southern Beale: i’d like a decently fast date book app, in which you can do all the usual datebook-y type things, plus write with a stylus. I want to be able to set an alarm for the stylus writing and have it interrupt me. The one that currently exists, Organizer HD, is sloooooow. And it has many functions I don’t care about, like pages you can write on separate from the calendar.

  205. 205
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Patrick: Thank you, Patrick. Now that you mention it, I bet that’s exactly what’s going on. I have seven hens and six nest boxes, which should be plenty. But they do tend to favor two nest boxes above all others. One time I found six eggs in ONE nest box. Weird critters!

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