Great Football Names

So the Eers barely escaped their game with Iowa State with a win, so I am in a better and more relaxed mood than usual for the past five weeks. Switched over to ESPN, where the Cincinnati Bearcats are taking on South Florida, and I basically am only watching because the Bearcats have two of the greatest names in football- their QB Munchie Legaux and a DL named Silverberry Mouhon. Both of those are outstanding, but I still think my favorite football name is Georgia’s Bacarri Rambo. Some other names I’ve loved in the past were Yancey Thigpen and Plaxico Burress (who is now a Steeler again).

For those of you who follow football, what are some of your favorite player names?

*** Update ***

I forgot about Champ and Boss Bailey, as well as Bronko Nagurski.

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196 replies
  1. 1
    latinist says:

    I mean, I hope everyone has seen this:

    http://youtu.be/gODZzSOelss

  2. 2
    Raven says:

    George Shorthose (WR, Mizzou 1985, Round 6, Miami Dolphins)

  3. 3
    Ben Franklin says:

    Rosie Grier…that is all.

  4. 4
    Yutsano says:

    Marshal Lobbestael, lovingly shortened to Lobstah.

    Oh and GO COUGS!!

    EDIT: And of course TUNCH!!

  5. 5
  6. 6
    Ben Franklin says:

    Oh, and Jackie Robinson…

    oops

  7. 7
    tom says:

    Martavious Odoms, who played for Michigan and is currently a free agent, has one of my favorite names.

  8. 8
    Raven says:

    Christian Okoyem, the Nigerian Nightmare

  9. 9
    The Fat Kate Middleton says:

    @Ben Franklin: I loved Rosie, Whar was hobby? Needlepoint?

  10. 10
    Raven says:

    @tom: Ali S. Haji-Sheikh weren’t bad either.

  11. 11

    Major Applewhite – Should have been a character in Catch-22

  12. 12
    MattR says:

    From yesterday’s first game: “Mercilus on the tackle.”

    My inner child enjoyed the former West Virginia defensive line duo Johnny Dingle and Scooter Berry.

  13. 13
    The Fat Kate Middleton says:

    Jesus .. WhaT WAS his hobby. Trying to write while I eat.

  14. 14
    Raven says:

    @The Fat Kate Middleton: I’ll stay away from any RFK jokes.

  15. 15
  16. 16
  17. 17
    cathyx says:

    Ochocinco, of course. I went to elementary school in a town called Eightyfour. Really. That’s where 84 Lumber was from.

  18. 18
    Raven says:

    Marques Tavita Tuiasosopo

  19. 19
    tom says:

    @Raven: it was Ali Haji-sheik, but yeah, good name. Tshimanga Biakabatuka is a great name too.

    Edit: I see you fixed Haji-sheik’s name.

  20. 20
    Yutsano says:

    @Raven: There’s a whole clan of them you know. Really big Samoan family and both the boys and girls are big athletes.

  21. 21
    MoeLarryAndJesus says:

    Tedy Bruschi, who somehow kept his dignity even though he could have made millions as a spokesman for Coors or Budweiser.

  22. 22
    Raven says:

    In other Dawg names “ANDRE “PULPWOOD” SMITH”!

  23. 23
    jlow says:

    Undamukong Suh does sound a bit like onomatopoeia for a hard kick to the nuts.

  24. 24
    Just One More Canuck says:

    Lawyer Milloy

  25. 25
    LT says:

    Say what you will about that other stuff – Orenthal is an awesome name.

    And I love how so many linebackers and OL and DL players could only by their names be linebackers and OL and DL. You’re never gonna hear, “And it’s a deep pass to Butkis…”, or, “And Ham with the fingertip grab in the end zone!,” right?

  26. 26
    Raven says:

    @tom: fixed, there was also the Nam vet kicker for Michigan who had some awful misses.

    ‘course I hate Michigan with a passion.

    eta Mike Lantry

  27. 27
    The Fat Kate Middleton says:

    @The Fat Kate Middleton: In answer to my own fkd up comment: http://www.amazon.com/Rosey-Gr.....0802704212

  28. 28
    Raven says:

    @Yutsano: Then there was Jack Thompson, the Throwin Samoan!

  29. 29
    ed_finnerty says:

    in the old XFL

    “He Hate Me”

  30. 30
    MattR says:

    How about current LSU LB Barkevious Mingo?

  31. 31
    Raven says:

    Eddie “Meat Cleaver” Weaver

  32. 32
    James Gary says:

    Twenty-eight posts and no one has yet mentioned Garo Yepremian, place-kicker for the Miami Dolphins in their early ’70s glory days? Fah. Adding immeasurably to the man’s coolness were his Austin Powers nerd-specs and his James Bond-ian jersey number–the double zero, 00.

    Edit: A quick Google search indicates that his jersey numbers were “1” and “47” and he didn’t wear glasses at all. Weird how memory plays tricks on you.

  33. 33
    Beauzeaux says:

    @latinist: The best.

  34. 34
    LT says:

    Dan Dierdorf.

    Sounds like an Austrian hunting village.

  35. 35
    J. says:

    D’Brickashaw Ferguson… Cadillac Williams… Prince Amukamara… Jermon Bushrod* (the last name alone is pure (Nick Man)gold)… Guy Whimper…

    *Reggie Bush… Danny Woodhead…

  36. 36
    hintn says:

    Hacksaw Reynolds / Mean Joe Greene / YA Tittle – you people are puppies!!!

  37. 37
    LT says:

    @James Gary: Consider me chastened. Watched him beat my Bills a Billion times, too.

    Oh hell, brings back another: Daryle Lamonica

  38. 38
    Raven says:

    @hintn: Sheeeet.

  39. 39
    LT says:

    Biletnikoff!

    God bless you.

  40. 40
    Raven says:

    Irv Kupcinet

  41. 41
    LT says:

    @hintn: Mean Joe Greene does not qualify. Simple dumb rhymes Do Not Qualify. You hear?

  42. 42
    Raven says:

    And the motherfucker of all mothefuckers, Joe Don Looney

  43. 43
    sidhra says:

    Dick Butkus.

  44. 44
  45. 45
    hintn says:

    @Raven: A freaking men!!!

  46. 46
    koolearl says:

    Mercury Morris

  47. 47
    hintn says:

    @LT: But, names baby – they’re what people say…

  48. 48
    Raven says:

    Tim Rossovich was a wild man AND a hippie!

  49. 49
    LT says:

    Engelbert Humperdinck – again, I tell, you – he could only have been a linebacker.

  50. 50
    Highway Rob says:

    Iowa State’s pr0n qb, Steele Jantz.

  51. 51
    eemom says:

    I think there is someone called R2D2 on the Redskins now.

  52. 52
    J. Michael Neal says:

    Giovanni van Bronckhorst

  53. 53
    koolearl says:

    Chris Fuamatu-Ma’afala

  54. 54
    handsmile says:

    “Crazy Legs” Hirsch, “Night Train” Lane (before my time, but still…)

    William “The Refrigerator” Perry.

    Jim Brown. (didn’t need nothing fancy nor no nickname neither)

  55. 55
    AnotherBruce says:

    Harry Colon, yes I am not making this up. He played in the NFL.

  56. 56
    redshirt says:

    Lynn Swan

    Pierre Garcon

  57. 57
    J. Michael Neal says:

    @Raven: Ali Haji-Sheik isn’t the same without the Michigan Stadium PA announcer really drawing it out.

  58. 58
    Raven says:

    @handsmile: Elroy, Dick and William.

  59. 59
    Raven says:

    “Champaign” Tony Eason

  60. 60
    Robin says:

    D’Brickshaw Ferguson.

  61. 61
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    Fair Hooker a wide receiver for the Cleveland Browns in the ’70s.

  62. 62
    Raven says:

    @Mr Stagger Lee: Icky Woods!

  63. 63
    karl says:

    Sonny Sixkiller; Larry Csonka; Lance Allworth.

  64. 64
    Raenelle says:

    A college basketball player from a couple of decades ago: Baskerville Holmes.

  65. 65
    Raven says:

    The dog show on NBC is better than this dog game. Go Dawgs!

  66. 66
    Yutsano says:

    Gronkowski. All three of them!

  67. 67
    AnotherBruce says:

    Pat Angerer is a hell of a name for a middle linebacker. But not quite as good as Butkus.

  68. 68
    realbtl says:

    Wasn’t there a college player from the 70s named I.M. Hipp?

    Or did I murder too many brain cells during those years.

  69. 69
    Raven says:

    Holy shit, you should see the size of this Dane and now a Mastiff!

  70. 70
    Raven says:

    @realbtl: QB Nebraska .

  71. 71
    redshirt says:

    I don’t think it can be argued that “Dick Butkus” is the greatest football name of all time. All other names are competing for 2nd place.

  72. 72
    realbtl says:

    @Raven:
    Ah, that’s reassuring. Thanks.

  73. 73
    handsmile says:

    @J. Michael Neal:

    What you did there, I see it.

    In reply, let me offer: Creedence Clearwater Couto.

    ETA: @ karl
    Well-played, sir!

  74. 74
    Raven says:

    @redshirt: His nephew, Mark, is an assistant at Illinois now.

  75. 75
    Uncle Cosmo says:

    Perfect LB name from Baltimore Colts’ rosters of the 60s: Thornton Steve Stonebreaker. How could a Stonebreaker be anything but a LB?

    Then there was the other HB (beside the great Lenny Moore) on the Baltimore Colts championship teams of 1958-59: L. G. “Long Gone” Dupree. (The initials stood for Louis George, but no one ever called him anything but L. G.)

  76. 76
    Yutsano says:

    @Raven: Yup. That’s another Coug right there!

  77. 77
    Kane says:

    I. M. Hipp

  78. 78
    Raven says:

    Charlie “Choo Choo” Brackins

  79. 79
    Raven says:

    Willie Thrower
    QB, Bears

  80. 80
    Raven says:

    Roy “Wrong Way” Riegels

  81. 81
    markus o'farkus says:

    Hart Lee Dykes, Sam Gash, Damien Woody

    After looking through a list of Patriot alums I was reminded of:

    Dick Shiner
    Shockmain Davis

    How could I ever forget Zefross Moss?

  82. 82
    Raven says:

    And while we are on my Illini

    Red “Wheaton Iceman” Grange

    and, of course, The Galloping Ghost of Illinois

  83. 83
    marianne19 says:

    Benjarvus Green-Ellis

  84. 84
    Cacti says:

    De’Cody Fagg and Craphonso Thorpe, both played at Florida State in the aughties.

  85. 85
    redshirt says:

    Fran Tarkenton has a fabulous name, especially for a Viking.

  86. 86
    Raven says:

    @redshirt: Or ViQueen!

  87. 87
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    Wonderful Terrific Monds II.

  88. 88
    And Another Thing… says:

    Sal Zizzo.…midfielder, Portland Timbers

  89. 89

    Garo Yepremian and Roman Gabriel.

    @James Gary had Garo already. Rats.

  90. 90
    redshirt says:

    @Raven: Dandy Don agrees!

  91. 91
    Keith says:

    A post about greatest football names ever, and you leave off Dexter Manley. Tough crowd.

  92. 92
    redoubt says:

    Can’t believe “Wahoo” McDaniel hasn’t come up yet.

    Eddie Lee Ivery (RB, Georgia Tech).

    Patrick Pass (WR, UGA). Or as the late Larry Munson used to say, “Paaaatrick Paaasss”

  93. 93
    p.a. says:

    Sam ‘Bam’ Cunningham (even though I agree nicknames shouldn’t count, I can’t resist). Lofa and Mosi Tatupu. Stanley Morgan, Homer Jones (Wall St. links). Deacon Jones. Bob Lurtsema (or was it Jim?). Andy Robustelli. Bubba Smith. Frenchy Fuqua. Roman Gabriel. James? Quick. Jamie Quirk (baseball). Pete and Charlie Gogolak.
    And arguably the greatest athlete’s name of all time, from basketball; Olden Polynice.

  94. 94

    Jim Kiick. It is “foot” ball, after all.

  95. 95
  96. 96
    Raven says:

    @redoubt: Remember when Larry used to call Jared Lorenzen Godzilla?

    eta

    Tron Jackson and Hiawatha Berry too! Go Dawgs, Beat Tech!

  97. 97
    Scott Alloway says:

    @The Fat Kate Middleton: Yep. Needlepoint. Remember that from an old TV program in which he was interviewed. He was Bobby Kennedy’s bodyguard, too, IIRC.

  98. 98
    Bill Murray says:

    @Raven: Isiah Moses Hipp was an I-back not a quarterback\

    and we shouldn’t forget Captain Munnerlyn, Atari Bigbee and Frostee Rucker

  99. 99
    DFS says:

    There has never been a greater pro football name than Mack Strong, veteran blocking fullback for the Seahawks.

  100. 100

    @DFS: Other good Seahawk names: Jim Zorn & Manu Tuiasosopo.

  101. 101
    Heliopause says:

    Can we include baseball names? Haven’t read all the comments but somebody must have mentioned Razor Shines.

  102. 102
    Raven says:

    @Bill Murray: I should have known that.

  103. 103

    Of course if you’re into the whole brevity thing, there’s always… Ray Guy.

  104. 104
    redoubt says:

    @Raven: “Godzilla”!. Yes, he was built like one.

    (I’m not really a college football fan, but I still hear Larry Munson every so often: “Loran! Whaddaya got?”)

    Also: Napoleon McCallum, Navy.

  105. 105
    Raven says:

    @redoubt: I used to see him at the Y. I’ll always remember seeing him on the first Saturday he wasn’t calling a game. I thought about speaking to him but decided to let him be.

  106. 106
    Bonnie says:

    I always thought Brian Piccolo was a great name for a football player.

  107. 107
    Jager says:

    Not famous but a great name a linebacker named Roger Bonk, drafted by the Stillers, cut, then player in Canada.

  108. 108
    Bostondreams says:

    Tom Brady, of course.

    What?

  109. 109
    Pappy G says:

    Jethro Pugh

  110. 110
    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again) says:

    Harlan Huckleby, God bless his cotton pickin’ maize and blue (and green and gold) heart!

  111. 111
    Raven says:

    Well shit, may as well throw Joe Theeseman in there.

  112. 112
    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again) says:

    @James Gary:

    …and he didn’t wear glasses at all. Weird how memory plays tricks on you.

    I’ll bet you’re confusing Yepremian with one of his contemporaries, also a kicker born outside of North America, Chester Marcol, who wore birth-control glasses during games later in his career.

  113. 113
    smithj86 says:

    Coy Bacon. Had his football card as a kid and never forgot it. And he was a great player–played DL until age 41 or so.

  114. 114
    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again) says:

    No one got to Emerson Boozer yet?

  115. 115
    Matt says:

    Not a football player, but Scientific Mapp

  116. 116
    Pappy G says:

    Also, Boobie Clark, if nicknames count.

  117. 117
    Captain Goto says:

    Ziggy Hood.

  118. 118
    Dee Loralei says:

    Another vote for Baskerville Holmes, though he played basketball for Univ of Memphis. Oklahoma had a basketball player named Mookie Blaylock. My husband threatened to name or son Shakespeare LaMookie so he’d be a great basketball player, LOL. We settled for Cooper Anderson.

    I always though ISU’s QB Seneca Wallace had a great name.

  119. 119
    Spike says:

    Basketball gets all the best names, none better than the brothers Mapp: Scientific and Majestic.

  120. 120
    Digital Amish says:

    Have you all forgotten that XFL great He Hate Me?

  121. 121
    Thlayli says:

    The Giants fans always referred to him as “Ali Haji-Shank”.

    Jarvis Redwine.

    Maurice Jones-Drew, sounds like he should be playing cricket for Oxford.

    Fuzzy Thurston.

  122. 122
    The prophet Nostradumbass says:

    Damarius Bilbo.

  123. 123
    Pappy G says:

    And in basketball I gotta go with World B. Free.

  124. 124
    Kent says:

    Colt McCoy (especially if you are a QB from Texas)

  125. 125
    Raven says:

    @Pappy G: “I’m so good even I couldn’t guard me”!

  126. 126
    Pappy G says:

    Elvis Peacock, played at Oklahoma in the seventies and then did a couple of seasons with the Rams. And speaking of the Rams, the Youngblood non-brothers, Jim and Jack.

  127. 127
    Geoduck says:

    The University of Washington finished its season by crashing and burning against Washington State. Doing better than a few years ago, scraped out a winning record in the end, but the roster is still weak and the head coach has to make some serious adjustments somewhere.

  128. 128
    Yutsano says:

    @Dee Loralei: Seneca played for the Seahacks for quite a few years. I’m not sure if he’s playing anymore though.

  129. 129
    Hayduke says:

    Elvis Peacock – running back in the wishbone formation for the Sooners in the mid-70s.

    Buster Rhymes – another player for the Sooners in the early 80s. No, not the musician.

  130. 130
    MoeLarryAndJesus says:

    @marianne19:

    Benjarvus Green-Ellis

    It’s BenJarvus Green-Ellis and you have to mention that his Patriots teammates nicknamed him “Law Firm.”

  131. 131
    MoeLarryAndJesus says:

    @Hayduke:

    Elvis Peacock – running back in the wishbone formation for the Sooners in the mid-70s.

    And not to be confused with Elvis Grbac.

    Or current Bronco Elvis Kool Dumervil.

    Yes, that’s his real middle name.

  132. 132
    James Gary says:

    @Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):

    Possibly. Just OT and FYI, I was five years old in 1972. There was some kind of NFL collect-em-all stamp book thing going on that year where when if you (or your supportive parent) bought stuff at some national chain (Seven-Eleven, if memory serves), you got a few trading-card-like sticker/stamps that you could paste into an album, the goal being to collect all stickers for the entire league (which as I recall was doable–I only ended up about ten short.) And I distinctly remember being absolutely obsessed with the oddball coolness of Yepremian–his unusual name, glasses and odd jersey number.

    So it was sort of a shock to Google it an hour ago and discover that sometime between 1972 and now I’d made the glasses/double-zero thing up. (Coincidentally (or not) the performance artist Matthew Barney (same age as me) has done a number of pieces about the Raider center Jim Otto, whose jersey number actually was 00. Some sort of weird Gen-X numerology, I must assume.)

  133. 133
    redoubt says:

    I’m a Chicago Bears fan, so:
    Beattie Feathers, Clyde “Bulldog” Turner, Ed Sprinkle, Mike Ditka, Rick Casares, Jack “State Street Jack” Concannon, and Noah Jackson, an offensive guard we used to call “Holding Noah.”

  134. 134
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    Igwebuike.Donald Ig-way-bwee-kay. Vince Dooley butchered it as something very close to “boo-kee.” As a boy, I thought it was the neatest-sounding football player name there was.

  135. 135
    Raven says:

    @redoubt: Noah played with Revie Rock Hollywood Sorey, another Illini!

  136. 136
  137. 137
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    Detlef Schrempf.

    Wait, wrong sport. Sorry. Cool name, though, you must acknowledge.

  138. 138
    Raven says:

    @Evolving Deep Southerner: Uwe Blab and Jens Kuwajah too!

  139. 139
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    @Raven: Hell, yes. Did you see where the Jackets couldn’t even be moved to buy up 8,000 tickets at Sanford? Ended up having to give up almost 2,000.

    That visitors’ section will be the visitors’ sliver tomorrow.

    I predict a blowout of epic proportions. And I’m telling you, if we could somehow, near-miraculously, figure out a way to beat Alabama, we’ll be playing Notre-Fucking-Dame for the tropy. And we would beat the hell out of that crowd as bad as we beat Hawaii in the Sugar Bowl a few years ago.

  140. 140
    Raven says:

    @Evolving Deep Southerner: I’m jacked but not so jacked that I gave up my week at the beach. I got SEC tix, probably upper endzone corner like last year. I hate the dome so I’ll probably sell them and make my money back from this putrid home schedule.

    eta

    Texas A&M doesn’t have anywhere near the “D” we do. We’ve got a shot, that’s all we can ask for.

  141. 141
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    @Raven: There’s the hockey player named Satan. It’s the ultimate badass athlete name on some level.

    Manut Bol is also good.

  142. 142
    Raven says:

    @Evolving Deep Southerner: Remember God Shammgod from Providence? He played in the 1997 regional in Charlotte where UT Chatanooga beat the Illini and the Dawgs!

  143. 143
    FlipYrWhig says:

    Growing up a Cowboys fan — though it didn’t stick in adulthood — I liked the secondary when it included “Everson Walls” and “Dexter Clinkscales.”

  144. 144
    FlipYrWhig says:

    @Evolving Deep Southerner: IIRC there were a few years when the same hockey team had both Zitnik and Zmelik, a/k/a Shitty and Smelly.

  145. 145
    burnspbesq says:

    The best names are from the 50s and 60s.

    Big Daddy Lipscomb, Night Train Lane, John Henry Johnson.

  146. 146
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    And one of the best names might be from our very own time. Staats Battle.

  147. 147
    FlipYrWhig says:

    @burnspbesq: And Chuck Bednarik.

  148. 148
    Raven says:

    Damn it, this AZ-ASU game sizes up to be good but my ass is worn out from fishing all day in a kayak! night

  149. 149
    burnspbesq says:

    @FlipYrWhig:

    Dick Modzelewski. Andy Robustelli. Spider Lockhart, Lee Roy Jordan, Deacon Jones.

  150. 150
    Quaker in a Basement says:

    Maybe not as colorful as many others listed here, but I always liked: Billy Cannon.

  151. 151
    Steeplejack (phone) says:

    Big Daddy Lipscombe.

    Can’t check spelling. The housecat made me go bed early so she can test-drive the new flannel comforter cover.

  152. 152
    redshirt says:

    @Evolving Deep Southerner: I have a Satan jersey, no joke. Bruins victory run was the perfect time to buy it and wear it around the city.

    Also: Second motion on “Deacon Jones”. Love him!

  153. 153
    Mikita21 says:

    Yelton Abraham (Y.A.) Tittle, QB, NY giants

    Otis Sistrunk, Oakland (the first time around) Raiders

    Go Blue!!!

  154. 154
    Mikita21 says:

    Yelton Abraham (Y.A.) Tittle, QB, NY giants

    Otis Sistrunk, Oakland (the first time around) Raiders

    Go Blue!!!

  155. 155
    Mikita21 says:

    Otis Sistrunk, Oakland raiders

    Yelton Abraham Tittle, QB, NY Giants

  156. 156
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    I can’t really think of a “Colt” quarterback who ever really lived up to their billing – Brennan or McCoy – but “Colt” is a pretty quarterbacky name. It’s almost like their dads were pointing at the fences as soon as they knew it was a boy.

  157. 157
    Neddie Jingo says:

    Jesus Christ, people — do you not remember Antwaan Randle-El? Does it get better than that? I think not!

  158. 158
    Librarian says:

    Joe Flacco

  159. 159
    Neddie Jingo says:

    Or Santana Moss — who I can’t ever help but Spoonerize into Mantana Sauce? Dude caught some passes this last week…

  160. 160
    FistOSalmon says:

    Nobody mentioned Sonny Sixkiller?!?! UW late sixties QB. Great football name, all time greatest quarterback name.

  161. 161
    Neddie Jingo says:

    …From R2D2… Hilarious…

  162. 162
  163. 163
    cuddlefish says:

    @redoubt: One of my favorites. Wahoo McDaniel was a Sooner and Bronco (not to mention a wrestling champion).

  164. 164
    chuck says:

    @burnspbesq:
    Yale Lary and Milt Plum

  165. 165
    burnspbesq says:

    The Heisman Trophy winner from La Jolla Country Day, Rahsaan Salaam.

    Sal Aunese, dead of stomach cancer at age 21. Knocked up his coach’s daughter and left behind a son who turned out to be a decent college player, T.C. McCartney.

    Samoa Samoa, QB, Wazzu, late 70s.

  166. 166
    The prophet Nostradumbass says:

    How about Jumpy Geathers?

  167. 167
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    @cuddlefish: I’ll see your Wahoo McDaniel and raise you one Angelo Mosca. Manny Hernandez was also a football player who went on to fame in pro-wrestling circles. And then, much later of course, Goldberg.

  168. 168
    The prophet Nostradumbass says:

    A couple of years ago, the Gin and Tacos guy had a funny post about ridiculous college football player names.

  169. 169
    honus says:

    Big Daddy Lipscomb and Night Train Lane are nicknames, for the rther mundane Eugene and Dick, respectively. I still remember those “6-Killer for Heisman” bumper stickers from back in the day. And watched a lot of Dallas games where the most fearsome guy on the field was named Bob Lilly. But for the best name of all, and no nickname either, you have to go with auto racing’s Dick Trickle.

  170. 170
    honus says:

    @Evolving Deep Southerner: You don’t mean Marshall Goldberg, NFL Hall of Famer via Pitt and Elkins W. Va.?

  171. 171
  172. 172
    Captain C says:

    Hokie Gajan, running back for the Saints in the ’80s.

    Joe Klecko, of the New York Sack Exchange.

    Browning Nagle had a much better name than career. IIRC, he was the guy picked next after Brett Favre.

    Maurice Carthon, Giants Super Bowl fullback, and fellow thousand yard rusher with Herschel Walker for the New Jersey Generals.

  173. 173
    Digby is God says:

    How can we be this far along without Carlester Crumpler??

  174. 174
    eclecticbrotha says:

    Can’t go wrong with a wide receiver named James Jett. And, he was fast enough to live up to his name.

  175. 175
    eclecticbrotha says:

    There was also a middle linebacker from Notre Dame named Mike Stonebreaker.

  176. 176
    notoriousJRT says:

    @Raven:
    Tui!

  177. 177
    notoriousJRT says:

    @Raven:
    Tui!

  178. 178
    notoriousJRT says:

    @Just One More Canuck:
    Ink Aleaga

  179. 179
    Basilisc says:

    Ephesians Bartley. Named after a book of the Bible.

    Naaah, they couldn’t go with “Samuel”. Or, for that matter, “John.”

  180. 180
    Basilisc says:

    @latinist: OK, so it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that was a parody.

  181. 181
    Basilisc says:

    The U of Texas used to have three running backs, named Johnnie “Lam” Jones, Johnnie “Ham” Jones, and Johnnie “Jam” Jones.

    The Philadelphia Eagles had a tight end named Keith Krepfle, which my family agreed was the singular of kreplach. Inside-ethnic-group joke.

  182. 182
    TG Chicago says:

    I always thought that Colt McCoy and Johnny Knox sounded like names of characters in a 1950s era comic strip about football.

  183. 183
    Basilisc says:

    Sort of related, at what point will young QBs decide it’s a good career move to take the nickname “Matt”? Sure seem to be a lot of Matts at QB in the NFL right now.

  184. 184
    Evolving Deep Southerner says:

    Tiaina Baul “Junior” Seau Jr. RIP.

  185. 185
    Mikita21 says:

    Cookie Gilchrist. — Saskatchewan Roughriders, Hamilton Tiger-Cats. (Grey Cup is Sunday!!)
    And of course, the Buffalo Bills!

  186. 186
    Bob says:

    Council Rudolph (name may be misspelled), defensive line, played for the St. Louis Cardinals. Drafted from royalty in the Austro-Hungarian Empire.

  187. 187
    mellowjohn says:

    @Count Ulster: van lingle mungo was a baseball player. as was mike kreevich (jean shepard did a great riff on white sox of the 30s and 40s built around him).

    when in comes to football names, i always like sonny sixkiller.

  188. 188
    Marcelo says:

    Sports Illustrated does an annual “All Name Team” celebrating the greatest names in college football. Current frontrunner is Wake Forest freshman God’s Power Offor, and the best part is they capture all the randoms in smaller teams like Philander Moore, as well as new recruits coming in like Gimel President, and Cassanova McKinzy.

    http://sportsillustrated.cnn.c.....index.html

    My favorite bit for John: “One potential name nightmare scenario could happen during bowl season. If West Virginia happens to meet Alabama in a bowl, it’s quite possible that Geno Smith could get intercepted by Geno Smith, given that the Mountaineers’ senior quarterback makes a bad read and throws in the vicinity of the Atlanta cornerback who plans to sign with the Crimson Tide next week.”

  189. 189
    Bubba says:

    Do nfl mascots count? If so, then

    Steely McBeam of the shitsburgh squeelers.

  190. 190
    redoubt says:

    OK, three more:

    Gino Marchetti and Madison Monroe “Buzz” Nutter, Baltimore Colts
    Vagas Ferguson (who Joe Montana used to hand off to at Notre Dame)

  191. 191
    Bolstring says:

    What about Lovie Smith?

  192. 192
    zonker says:

    I know you’re talking football, but I was a basketball player, and I was always fond of the name Baskerville Holmes from U of Memphis.

  193. 193
    Mikita21 says:

    Van lingle mungo is also a great song by dave frishberg………the lyrics made up of nothing but interesting baseball (sorry!) names.

  194. 194
    Thor Heyerdahl says:

    Dick Shatto

  195. 195
    John Revolta says:

    Ed O’Bradovich.

    How you gonna f*ck with ED O’BRADOVICH??

  196. 196
    bupalos says:

    Browns had a decent safety in the 90s named Thane Gash. And Webster Slaughter was pretty good too.

    Best name and one of the best players in the draft this year is Barkevious Mingo, which must have been mentioned before now.

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